Lucha Underground Episode 36: The Beginning of the End Review

ER: So Pentagon's Master will reveal himself when he "proves that he is ready", which I assume is going to be a loooooong time from now as he's presently getting handled by tiny women and tubby announcers.

1. Bengala vs. Delavar Daivari

ER: I'm torn on whether to give Striker credit or not for "Bengala trying to earn his stripes". I groaned, but also appreciated how he said it in a real understated way instead of trying to yuk it up. Not a big fan of more Daivari wrestling on TV, but they kept this short at least. Bengala hit a great dive past the turnbuckles, and I liked his rolling German finish, but this really wasn't much.

PAS: I thought this was pretty good, Daviari is one of my least favorite people in this fed (and they all wrestled tonight!!) but he was inoffensive, and I thought Bengala was pretty cool, I loved all of the backfire interference spots by Big Ryck, and Bengalas tope taking him out was pretty cool. Perfectly acceptable stuff.

ER: I don't think I've ever seen anybody get more laid out by a chokeslam than Pentagon was here. Dude looked like he died after taking a 4 foot back bump. I'm just really not sure what to make of this whole feud. Pentagon is likely going to win, but I imagine Vampiro is going to come out looking like the real winner. The crowd seemed amped to see an out-of-shape-Vic-Mackey-stuck-behind-a-desk cosplayer take out one of the bigger badasses in the fed, and it's likely not going to be as infuriating as the wretched and embarrassing Sexy Star feud, but there's just no amount of smoke and mirrors that can make this good, right? This whole promo segment was pretty bad. Last week Vampiro got jumped and got gasoline dumped all over him. This week he and Pentagon stand in the ring NOT tearing each other apart, Pentagon making Ian Hodgkinson jokes, Vampiro casually walking around the ring with his back turned to Pentagon (the man who just attacked him from behind last week), just a bad bad segment.

PAS: I think Vampiro has been OK in this role, I agree about the craziness of that chokeslam being sold like that and I would rather see Pentagon do something else, but this is worlds better than the Sexy Star feud, and if you are going to build to a Vampiro match in 2015 you could certainly do worse then this.

2. King Cuerno vs. Killshot

ER: Cuerno hasn't been on in over a month, and now he's waiting in the ring after a commercial break while fucking KILLSHOT gets his entrance!? That's some absurd bullshit right there. And Vampiro is now just like that my new hero, as Killshot does an embarrassing running back elbow and Vampiro goes "what was THAT?" Nobody knows, Vamp. It certainly doesn't look like something meant to do harm to another human. Killshot may have the most thigh slap based offense I've ever seen. And none of his strikes ever look like they land. They're timed properly with the slap, the strikes just look horrible. And my god all of his moves start with a long looping somersault. Can't just do a diamond cutter, gotta handspring over the ropes and do a slooooow somersault before bunnyhopping up into one! It's all so hideous. Cuerno having to sell for this goof is a travesty. I'm reluctant to give him credit, but at least Killshot dies on a nasty apron sideslam, and holds his ground to take the Cuerno tope, and spikes himself on a nutty reverse rana. It should be noted, though, that every single move Cuerno did to Killshot did less harm than Vampiro's little chokeslam did to Pentagon. So much hate flowing through me right now.

PAS: Killshot did die nastily on the bumps he took, he might be fine as a Joel Goodhart style jobber who just gets murdered by guys who want to put over. Just never let him get any offense. He has to have the worst thigh slaps I have ever seen, just so obvious, it is like 60's Batman cartoon exclamations.

3. Super Fly vs. Sexy Star

ER: Just make it stop. I don't know why it's happening, I don't want to know why. Just take her off my TV. Please. It's awful.

4. Marty the Moth Martinez vs. Sexy Star

ER: It's so fucking terrible. It's pointless to even waste time watching it at this point. She's going to be on TV every week, she's never going to look good, she has the magic powers to make every opponent  suddenly not able to hit his moves at full strength. It's getting so damn tiring watching everybody have to noticeably hold back on their power moves. We get it, she is so tough and her story is truly inspirational to us ALL. Except I don't get what's inspiring, and she can't be that tough if guys have to set her down on the mat afraid that she'll snap in half. Is this some sort of elaborate Make A Wish campaign? Is Sexy Star dying? Did she win a sweepstakes?

PAS: I imagine both matches went about 20 minutes live and they had to edit them down to 90 seconds each to make them look semi professional.

ER: Well this has to be the worst episode in the show's history, right? Every match featured my least favorite people in the fed, with Daivari, Sexy Star and Killshot all getting WAY TOO MUCH screen time, and all looking like people who do not deserve any sort of screen time.

PAS: This show felt like a rib.



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Lucha Underground Episode 35: Fuel to the Fire Review

ER: Loved Pentagon meeting with his Master in the dojo, but really this Master sounds like a tough customer. You think he would be more unhappy with his slave looking like such a weenie against Sexy Star and a tubby commentator.

1. The Mack vs. Cage

ER: Oh man Striker calls Mack "lucha Ron Funches". That's awesome. Funches is a huge wrestling fan so I bet that tickled him. And this match was awesome. Two big guys who can move, simultaneously working a fast spot match and a power offense match. Right out the gate they slam into each other with double clotheslines and it makes this crazy sound, just two slabs of meat slamming into each other (oh man picture Kal Rudman saying a sentence like that...). All their power moves looked great, Cage holding a long vertical suplex, Mack doing a running vertical suplex, Mack hitting a nasty shin kick to Cage's jaw, Cage laying Mack the fuck out with his awesome discus clothesline (I've been critical of Cage in the past, but his discus clothesline ALWAYS looks great). These guys have been perfect foils for each other in LU, and they left me wishing the match was twice as long. This was about as much fun as you can cram into 5 minutes.

PAS: Yeah this was an awesome short Nitro match, I loved them coming out and slamming each other with clobbering lariats early. I have no problem with this going short as it was clearly setting up a big Ultimo Lucha match, the show is much more like a pre-PPV Raw then it ever was before, although it is a fine pre-PPV Raw.

ER: Vampiro was a bit too scripted in the Pentagon interview, but overall I liked it. I liked the humble approach Vampiro attempted to take, and liked the subtle reveal that Pentagon has the psychic power to magically place his chair back in a seated position.

2. Mil Muertes vs. Son of Havoc

ER: Damn, Muertes waiting in the ring and freaking Son of Havoc gets his entrance shown?? That shouldn't be. And I have no godly reason why they felt the need to make Havoc look so strong against Muertes. They needed to give Havoc a knee injury, and then have him distracted by taking out the Disciples of Death, and THEN Muertes was able to gain an advantage over him. It's structured really poorly as Havoc goes on his big offensive run after getting powerbombed meanly on the announce table and thrown through dozens of ringside chairs. I don't dislike Havoc, and I like him as part of their trios. But Muertes needed to just steamroll him here. What's even more odd is it was never pushed as Havoc having a chance. Striker said once that it would be maybe the biggest upset in LU, but even when Havoc was controlling things they were talking about how Muertes was going on to face Puma at Ultima Lucha. So we have Havoc looking really strong against Muertes but not really getting credit for it, and your big monster working underneath in a match against him. It just did not make sense to me.

PAS: It does seem weird that Havoc has gone from a jobber to a guy getting so much offense against the biggest killer in the fed. Muertes is really good at working in these type of matches killing flyers and I though this had some cool moments, but this did need to be closer to the second Fenix v. Muertes match.

ER: Didn't see the Blue Demon heel turn coming but that makes me infinitely more interested in Demon than I've ever been. So that counts for something.

3. Albert El Patron, Aerostar, Drago & Sexy Star vs. Johnny Mundo, Jack Evans, Super Fly & Hernandez

ER: Man this fed is good at multi mans. This had everything you could possibly want, with Alberto looking like a big deal, Aerostar hitting this loony springboard reverse frog splash type thing to the floor....I mean good lord it looked weird and awesome. Drago brains himself on a tornillo, Sexy Star hits her own tornillo after setting it up for what I can only guess was several minutes edited down to still feel too long. Evans bumped all over the place in equally humorous and awesome fashion, and then was outbumped by Super Fly who took a big hiptoss over the top to the floor. Splat. Finish got a little silly with Evans having to move himself away from the ropes on the Patron armbar to stay in it longer, and then Mundo beating Sexy Star by holding the tights. The level of protection SS gets in this fed is flat out absurd.

PAS: This is the perfect kind of match to set up a big show, throw everyone in the ring and let them go after each other. I did think parts of this looked bad, especially the Sexy Star parts. Jack Evans is a loon and just takes everything in the worst way. Aerostar is a guy with a bunch of really pretty dives, although I did wish we got to see him and Super Fly go at it a bit, I know their feud isn't LU canon or anything, but I did love stuff like Piper and Valentine going after each other in Royal Rumbles.

ER: I think the Pentagon beatdown crossed a line for me. Not a moral line, but more just taking something so far that it gets eyeroll-y. Him ambushing Vampiro was awesome, kicking him hard in the back of the head, kicking him around at ringside. But then he gets a can that actually says "GASOLINE" all around it (I imagine he also keeps his money in burlap sacks with $$$ printed on the side) and douses Vampiro with it, threatening to light him on fire. Can you imagine if somebody did this in Vince Russo WCW? It would be getting mocked to this day. I really don't see how this is any less stupid than Tank Abbott holding a knife to Big Al's throat and threatening to kill him. The beatdown on Vampiro looked SOOOO good. But threatening to light a man on fire? My god that is just so stupid. Several weeks ago Pentagon went after Melissa Santos and it was shocking, over the line and within the realm of believability. It made Pentagon come off like not only a loose cannon, but a real scumbag, and a man with no code who is completely unpredictable. Now I know this promotion is clearly not going for believability. They have ghosts and the living dead and a dragon, and - maybe the most unbelievable thing possible - they attempt to make Sexy Star appear like a credible pro wrestler. But to expect anybody to get emotionally invested in a real person getting lit on fire in front of an audience...that's just so silly. At this point why didn't Pentagon just drop an anvil on Vampiro's head?

PAS: This fed does a bunch of goofy shit which irritates me, but honestly lighting a guy on fire is part of the narrative world of pro wrestling. This wasn't that far off from the Sheik, Lawler and virtually the same as the kind of stuff that they do in Big Japan. As a crazy threat it was fine, and I did like the out of nowhere attack. I have way more problems with all the goofy Black Lotus stuff then I did with this.


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Lucha Underground Episode 33: Death vs. The Dragon Review

ER: Kinda lost a little interest in LU for a couple weeks, got a little burnt out. That episode with Sexy Star vs. Pentagon kinda took a bit out of me, made me more interested in checking out other things for a few weeks. So naturally, Sexy Star is in the first fucking match when I decide to dive back in. Super Fly is good in the pre-match interview, talking about how he wanted Pentagon to break her arm, to feel the pain that he felt, but then Vampiro had to get into the ring and stop him.

1. Sexy Star vs. Super Fly

ER: And this was not good. Super Fly worked pillowy soft gentle on Sexy Star, really pulling back on every single thing he did. Even the end powerbomb looked like he was gently setting down an antique nightstand while helping his mom move. Every elbow drop, senton, thigh slap kick, all of it looked like fake fighting John Cena would do when visiting a Make-a-Wish kid with Brittle Bone Disease. Sexy Star for her part looked predictably garbage. She fell way short on several of her moves, requiring Super Fly to run towards her to catch the move. I don't know how he managed to save one of her top rope armdrags. She was going to land nowhere near him, and he managed to sprint ahead, catch her arm and believably take an armdrag. He worked a miracle right there. So yes, we get Sexy Star getting handled like a delicate Faberge egg, and Fly having to push the boundaries of believability just to take any of her offense. You know, it was a reallll Sexy Star match!

PAS: I liked Super Fly's outside of the ring bump, he is a pretty bland guy, but a solid wrestler. Would have been a good guy to throw under the Disciple of Death gimmick rather then the guys they are using. Still Sexy Star is atrocious and this was by far her longest match and worse performance. She would be a bottom five WWE diva, and there are tons better luchadoras who could have this gimmick.

ER: So Pentagon is going full force into a feud with tubby Vampiro. Super Fly just beat Sexy Star fairly easy. Pentagon needed Fly's help to beat her. Now he's going to feud with a guy who can barely move. I'm not loving the direction for Pentagon right here, especially considering where he was just 4-6 episodes ago.

2. Aerostar vs. Cage vs. The Mack vs. Marty the Moth

ER: Those medallions reallllly look like the Legends of the Hidden Temple medallions. If they bring in some Temple guards to lurk in the shadows, I'd go full thumbs up. I'm not even asking for Olmec here. Just give me some Temple guards jumping out and scaring kids. This fed really knows how to work satisfying 4 way matches, and this was no different. Even with The Moth's brand of "comedy" and some lesser stuff from Cage, this still easily worked. Mack had maybe his best LU showing yet, every single thing he did looked awesome. His strikes put Cage's to shame, his bumping was great, all of his impressive spots looked impressive. I mean dear lord that overheard belly to belly he gave Cage on the apron was just crazy for both men to pull off. Willie Mack is like the perfect 4 way spotfest worker. He is truly the ideal LU guy. Aerostar hit some nice stuff including a wild triple jump flip dive. Moth almost took a header on his dive and I guess takes a beating okay. I dunno. His brand of comedy was not really what I was looking for from LU.

PAS: I really liked this, and didn't even mind the Moth as much as Eric did, I thought his dive was pretty cool, and I dig his sleazeball comedy, he is less Colt Cabana then John Tatum. The Mack was incredible here and I am really looking forward to his big Cage match as those guys clearly have worked each other a ton, and are going to go crazy on a big stage. Cage is a hit or miss dude with me usually, but he was pretty dope here, I loved him doing curls with Aeorstar before chucking him over the top.

ER: My god. The lightning in that segment. Lightning which grows slow moving wrestlers with ABS. That happened. Catrina is good in these kind of segments, though it feels like if I were an acting coach I would regularly be telling her "you're acting through your nostrils too much. Less nostrils."

PAS: It was pretty dumb, I hated Papa Shango, and I don't like this either.

3. Drago vs. Mil Muertes

ER: Hernandez jumps Drago before the bell and looks really vicious doing so. Really got over how weak Drago was going to be going into the match against Muertes. Hernandez' hammer blow to the back looked especially brutal. So Drago is weakened for the match, and because of that the match was merely decent. It was certainly not bad. Muertes looked like a monster, hitting a ridiculously awesome spear/double leg, tossing Drago into chairs and bouncing chairs off his body, nasty powerbomb onto the announcer table, etc. They got a little crossed up in the middle and were doing some awkward walking around to get into proper position, but they eventually got nicely back on track. I dug Muertes being the one to roll through Drago's (up until now) sure thing victory roll-up, and his blows to Drago's back after rolling through looked tough. Good for the goal it set out to do, and I'm definitely down for seeing Muertes/Puma.

PAS: This was an extended squash, but Murtes is really great at these squashes where a guy gets in a couple of big hope spots before getting murked. There was a little awkwardness, but the violence of it totally made up for it. The stuff with the chairs was next level awesome, all the broken wood and shards made it look like an earthquake hit the set.

ER: At least the show got the shit out of the way early, but my oh my was that Sexy Star match shit. Easily a contender for worst match in LU history. There have maybe been shorter matches that were more offensive, but this was given a little time and my god did she just look so horrible. But we got that out of the way early, and the rest of the show was a keeper.

PAS: 2 out of 3 ain't bad at all, and both of the good matches were very good


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Lucha Underground Episode 22: Mask versus Mask Workrate Report

ER: I love the addition of the trios titles. Feels more than appropriate for this fed. The fed seems like it has a good head as far as keeping titles important, so I love the prospect of wild trios title matches.

1. Angelico, Ivelisse & Son of Havoc vs. Aerostar, Drago & Fenix

ER: This may be the first time I've ever said the words "I wish we were getting more tournament wrestling!" Wrestling tournaments are kind of famously lame. Trios tourney is 2 for 2 so far and I'm really loving these tossed together teams with something to prove. Angelico decided he was going to take a bunch of DDTs right on his head, we had an all time great dive train, and one of the most fascinating/stupid/dangerous/WHY spots of all time, with Aerostar standing straight up on Fenix's shoulders, on the middle rope, with Fenix idiotically leaping off to send Aerostar leaping off of him. My brain immediately went to the Sid leg break, or the Gronda leg break, or the Mickey Knuckles leg break, or any other stupid leg break where somebody decided to jump from heights and land on their feet. Stupid stupid stupid. Havoc is now way over with the crowd so kudos to the way they've booked him so far, loved him interrupting Ivelisse's dive with a crazy flip dive of his own. This was all sorts of fun.

PAS: This was a blast, they are clearly taking the WCWSN style of lucha trios match for this fed, which is fine. Guys like Angelico and Fenix who maybe a little questionable in a singles match, are perfect here as they can hit their cool shit and get out of the way, and they all have some cool shit. That dive train was bonkers, the Fenix rope walk Foley elbow was one of the cooler spots of the year. I usually hate feuding tag partners stuff, but this didn't derail the match. Good stuff.

ER: Loved the numerous takes of Puma/Mundo's Predator-style zoomed in flexed arm handshakes.

2. Super Fly vs. Sexy Star

ER: Dario announces the pre-match mask vs. mask stip which is a little weird, as there's no feud between these two and just the prior week they were helping each other. Interesting, because I've never seen an "owner" force two people against each other by making sure one of them loses something important, but dumb because they threw out a gigantic stipulation match with zero build whatsoever. And then we go and get a 4 minute match that ends with no real build. Super Fly looked good in this, his uppercuts looked great and he tried to take Sexy's stuff as plausibly as possible. But then we get a roll up finish with Super Fly apparently not able to kick out of a cradle from a 120 lb. person. I get that this puts over the unpredictability of Cueto, but this is the first mask match of the promotion and really should have been made into a much much bigger deal. Yes, a lot of us knew that Super Fly lost his mask in Mexico already at this point, but I'd wager a lot of viewers did not know this, and maybe had never seen a mask match before. And now their first exposure to a legendary stipulation was a 4 minute match with somebody winning a mask in unconvincing fashion. It worked as a Dario dickhead move. I don't think it worked in any other way.

PAS: This was super dumb. I guess it was a fine bit of character work for Dario, but talk about shitting away a big opportunity. You only have one chance to debut the mask v. mask stipulation and make it a huge deal, and they piss it away on a nothing four minute match that ends in a roll up. Imagine how big a Puma v. Muertes mask match could have been if you built it over a season, or even something like Son of Havoc v. Aerostar. Now they have conditioned their audience to view it as a throw away middle of the show thing. Dumbest booking in this fed so far.

3. Prince Puma vs. King Cuerno

ER: Pretty disappointed with this one. There's a lot of involvement with the seconds and thirds, and any time I have the option of "normal match" or "match with Hernandez and Cage interference" I'll probably usually choose the former. They worked some unique interference or feuding seconds spots, with Puma doing a dive that gets caught by Cuerno's seconds, who toss Puma into a Cuerno neckbreaker. Later on and Mundo hits a wild sideways cannoball over the top taking out some dudes. But I don't know, the whole thing felt pretty disjointed, and Cuerno doesn't seem to be treated as much of a threat anymore which makes me sad.

PAS: I liked this more then Eric, I think it was a mistake to make it a title match, instead it should have just been a set up for next weeks trios, but as the RAW match to set up Survivor Series it was pretty good. I liked all of the interference spots, and Mundo's dive ruled.


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Lucha Underground Episode 21: Uno! Dos! Tres! Workrate Report

ER: Ryck and his boys (including Willie Mack!) confronting Dario, with his boys holding him down while Ryck casually eyes his lit cigar, made me legit tense and nervous. These vignettes are so damn effective.

1. Angelico vs. Johnny Mundo

ER: I really liked all the kung fu counter sequence. I could also see putting some guys on blast for something like that, but fuck you're on a network where 20% of the programming is kung fu movies, so it feels like a nice thing to do, like it will make for a nice "Network Synergy" montage to be shown at an El Rey corporate retreat. This whole match was really a pleasant surprise. Not something I was excited for when I saw the lineup. Angelico has some junky looking offense (I hate his missed punches, he throws them with the same arm slot you'd throw a baseball), but he will bump like a loon and he flies admirably into some of Mundo's goofy-yet-fun offense here. Mound's parkour wall-leaping spin kick was awesome, Angelico can throw a fine flying knee, Mundo dumped him with a top rope powerbomb, just a bunch of fun quirky spots that all landed.

PAS: Man I kind of like Angelico in this fed. Pretty shocked, as he was a nightmare when he first showed up. This was dosey doe wrestling, but it had some very awesome individual moments, this was the coolest Mundo parkour stuff yet, and I could live without ever seeing another Angelico v. Mundo punch exchange, but there was way more to like then dislike.

ER: And talk about stuff that's perfect for El Rey, now we have an "Avenging my parents' death" angle. Yes!! Next we'll have somebody debuting because they're trying to rid their village of drug lords. Or a rare elephant heirloom has been stolen from their village and people in Lucha Underground know where it is.

2. Drago vs. Aerostar

ER: A little disjointed but with these two at this point I really don't care, they're just too fun to watch. You get the dives you want, some of their cool headscissor takedowns; Aerostar does a bunch of effortless stuff, but also peppers in nice between move stuff like nice stomach kicks and a couple mean stomps to Drago's head. I love the force Aerostar gets on his spin around rope walk dropkick, love Drago's tight cradles and submissions. The finishing flash pin worked for me because it looked constructed in a way that Aerostar kicking out of it was unlikely. Drago did such a cool job of grapevining every limb.

PAS:  A little less crazy then some of their other matches, but it definitely had it's moments, Aerostar has been awesome so far, I think they should push him as one of the top guys going forward, he has really put it all together.

3. Big Ryck, Killshot & The Mack vs. Sexy Star, Super Fly & Pentagon Jr.

ER: Killshot is Shane Strickland, who was in one of the worst matches I've seen in the last decade. I know there are a finite amount of black indie guys available, but come on man. Toss Derrick King some dollars or something. And man was Strickland predictably bad in this. All of his overly rehearsed strike combos looked so awkward. And his flying offense is completely negated by teaming up with a giant fat dude who does way more impressive flying offense. Hats off to him for catching Star on the alley oop top rope rana but damn did he look like shit in this. That's not even factoring in his shitty lurching body posture and mannerisms, which I guess is his idea of character work? Really would have been flipping the hell out for this if it was Ryck/Mack vs. Pentagon/Fly and those guys all straight brung it. The Pentagon/Mack stuff was godly, with Pentagon lighting Mack's chest up with chops (Pentagon really came off like a menacing badass throughout, even against the much larger Ryck) and Mack hitting all his super impressive fat guy flying. Striker was a complete king of the misplaced references twat throughout the show, here saying Mack reminded him of a young Junkyard Dog...as Mack is hitting a springboard armdrag.

PAS: There isn't really a finite amount of indy black guys though (I mean technically the number isn't infinite, but in the colloquial sense of the term, scarcity isn't an issue) so here comes a classic Segunda Caida name drop, 27 indy black guys who would have been better then Shane Strickland in this six man

1. ACH
2. Louis Lyndon
3. Flip Kendrick
4. Rich Swann
5. Derrick King
6. 2 Cold Scorpio (how fucking great would 2 Cold be in Lucha Underground)
7. AR Fox
8. Boyce Le Grande
9. Dairus Carter
10. Jonathan Gresham
11. Se7en
12. Virgil Flynn
13. Marcus Lewis
14. Kongo Kong
15. Moose
16. Big Ben Johnson
17. Trevor Aeon
18. Black Baron
19. Jay Lethal
20. The Dark Mon
21. Brian XL
22. Shadow Jackson
23. Jon Williams
24. Trey Williams
25. Fred Vehi
26. Cedrick Alexander
27. Oaktown Kid Tyson Thompson

I have no idea what that Killshot suplex was supposed to be, it looked like he powerslammed himself. Continuing to love Ryck in this fed, and this really made me want to see Ryck v. Pentagon singles match. Also dug the Mack too he looks way more polished then last time I saw him. Despite Sexy and Killshot, this was very good.

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Lucha Underground Episode 15: Eye for an Eye Workrate Report

1. Mil Muertes vs. Chavo Guerrero, Jr.

ER: Well. This was…okay? Kinda felt like treading water. I liked Chavo's plancha. The best stuff all happened post match as Muertes punches a chair out of Chavo's hands and then lands his best right hand of the match. It is kinda funny that Russo rumors circulated last week and this week we have Muertes choking Catrina and almost doing his finisher on her (yes yes I know these were taped months ago). I also liked Fenix and Catrina's super sloppy drunk person make out sesh.

PAS: I liked Chavo in this fine and this was the best in ring match of a pretty weak show. Don't really know if we established Muertes and Catrina's relationship enough to have their break up mean a ton. Also have no idea who the face and who the heel in their relationship is.

ER: I've gotten so used to the low hanging fruit advertising aimed at us dummy wrestling fans that I mostly just tune out and fast forward if possible, but man is it a little jarring seeing gory Lucio Fulci movies advertised on TV during wrestling.

2. Ivelisse vs. Angelico

ER: This was amusing for what it was. Ivelisse's stuff looked good, if unlikely. I liked how supportive and helpful Son of Havoc was. It's refreshing not seeing the jealous man angle. I like the idea of loser Son of Havoc being the jobless stay-at-home boyfriend who still doesn't really do his share of the chores.

PAS: No idea why you'd do two breakup angles back to back. This seemed like sort of a waste of time to me, although Angelico does have some sleazebag charisma.

3. Super Fly vs. Texano

ER: Not really the debut path I would have taken for Texano, working mirror sequences with a flier, but whatever. Now the post match stuff with Patron was great. Texano laces into him with a couple stiff shots on the floor and Alberto goes off and beats him with nasty shots with the bull rope wrapped around his fist.

PAS: Texano's finisher is really dumb looking. I also really dug the post match brawl. I haven't seen any of the Patron v. Texano matches in AAA, but this made me want to check some of them out.

4. Bael, Cortez Castro & Mr. Cisco vs. Pimpinela Escarlata, Sexy Star & Mascarita Sagrada

ER: I thought this served its purpose. Dario set up The Crew with some theoretical tomato cans, two of whom they dispatched easily and the other they toyed with too long. Pimpi got dealt with first and I really liked the way he sold being choked out by the kendo stick. Cisco generously bumps a bit for Sagrada but eventually they hit a rough curb stomp and nasty apron powerbomb on him and B-Boy finally does something that looks decent by yakuza kicking Sagrada on the floor (the overhead camera shot betrays us again as Sagrada does a dive but it doesn't look like much with that view). That leaves us with The Crew taking on Sexy Star, and some stuff looked better than others but I thought this was effective if they actually plan on continuing to push Star. Ryck comes down the temple stairs looking like one hoss motherfucker, allowing Star to get a reverse roll-up on Bael (jeez he could have at least attempted to get one of his shoulders down for the pin. He was leaned way up into her ass crack so that it didn't even look like a pin). Striker even made a Donovan Morgan reference, which is weird.

PAS: I would have rather seen the first part of this match be a little more even until they started taking people out. Pimpi is a great brawler, and he falls really fast. I did like the curbstomp on the chair, if you a writing someone out, that is a nasty way to do it. There were moments in the Sexy Star match, but other stuff did not look good.

ER: Kind of a flat show this week. Most weeks the hour breezes right by but this one kind of dragged. Not much good in the wrestling department and not much to the backstage segments.

PAS: Yeah this was the worst show they have done. Also really odd booking having implied sexual assault in three separate segments. Really hurts the main event threatened rape, if that is an undercard spot too. Really feels like the part of Foley's book where he had a bloody match planned against Gilbert and they ran a first blood battle royal as the opener.


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Lucha Underground Episode 12: They Call Him Cage

PAS: Cage really needs a manager, what is Jeff G. Bailey doing these days.

1. Fenix vs. Mil Muertes

PAS: This is the best Muertes has looked, (not literally, his pants still suck) I really liked his jabs and big right hands and all of his throws looked good. Fenix mostly just stuck and moved which kept him from doing some of his dumber more elaborate stuff. Still have no idea why they had a David v. Goliath opener, on the same show with a David v. Goliath main event

ER: I thought this match was awesome. Both guys laid in shots, Fenix bumped all over, and everything looked cool. Perfect little WorldWide match. Fenix peppered in a couple stiff elbow shots, great running knee and then of course spectacular leans into everything Muertes throws. I rewound a couple different moments in this which is always a good sign. Loved how Fenix bumped that running punch from Muertes, loved how he took the spear, loved him getting dumped by a deadlift suplex and really loved him getting plopped on his head in the corner from a belly to belly. Really liked both guys in this. Just a perfect short match.

PAS: They are still great at the vignettes, as Cage as crazy street fighter crushing bottles with his hands is the best use of him

ER: This was great, loved that shot of Cage looking at the camera while a dude ran up and broke a bottle over his head and Cage no sold it. This episode is off to a killer start.

2. Argenis, Super Fly & Aerostar vs. Mr. Cisco, Bael & Cortez Castro

PAS: Really fun match, the crew are one of my favorite things in this fed, even Bael looked a little better then he had in the past. Just balls to the wall stuff, with Aerostar breaking out a little from the pack, he really moves smooth, just effortless flow with all of his moves, and some really nutso dives. I liked the AAA trio (although it ignores the Aerostar v. Super Fly mask v. mask beef) they should give them all matching gear and a gimmick. I could see this matchup a ton of different times.

ER: Man I wasn't expecting this to get 10+ minutes but I'm glad it did! Tons of crazy stuff in this. Aerostar standing on Argenis shoulders, while Argenis himself stood on the ropes, to deliver a crossbody was nuts and something I've never seen. Also loved the corner dropkick sequence that saw the Crew each get to attempt to scrape Aerostar's mask off onto their boots. We had some wild dives, Cisco getting rana'd off the top onto everybody, the weird Striker overhype for Argenis (a couple weeks ago he compared him to Silver King and Dr. Wagner, who he is absolutely nothing like, and this week he compares him to Hijo Del Santo), Cisco continuing to be a chubby little bump machine and doing a bunch of nice little things (loved how he really went for the legs on drop downs), and arguably the most I've ever enjoyed Cortez/Reyes. This episode is on a freaking roll.

PAS: I know I don't want to see Vampiro v. Konan in the ring, but I did enjoy their face off. I am a fan of Konan on this show and I like all of the history you felt in that face off. Maybe they could do a poor mans Eddie Marlin v. Tommy Gilbert match cowboy boot match.

ER: Boy, for two guys I never liked in their prime, and two guys I know would be horrible now……I really want to see a Vampiro/Konnan fight now. I really liked their interactions throughout this interview, and maybe if they know their own extreme limitations they can hobble something out? I love old guy fights so if it's them potatoing each other for a few minutes I could see me loving it more than anything else they've ever done.

3. Prince Puma vs. Cage

ER: This match was weird as I enjoyed the ring work of both men, while at the same time had a major problem with the match structure. In a vacuum, both guys looked good. Cage got to do his power offense and had some neat little ways to cut off offense, loved his little shoulder shrug to block Puma offense, loved him burying his shoulder into Puma's stomach in the corner, then shaking him off. A lot of Puma's stuff looked nice, he really lands with accuracy and it makes his flying stuff look better than most. But the problem was they've presented Cage as this bulldozer street fighter and now he's wrestling the same as Fenix. It's that horrible Abyss paradox where he's larger and can bump, but would bump exactly the same no matter if he was wrestling Chris Sabin or Rhino or Sonjay Dutt. Here Cage breaks out his 2nd rope moonsault and bumps all over for Puma, which is impressive, but completely absurd. I hate this even stevens kind of thing anyway, but when there's this kind of size difference you just can't work this kind of match. And this is a corner they backed themselves into when having a couple large guys in a fed made up of a bunch of smaller guys. Phil mentioned earlier they booked a David & Goliath undercard match on a show with a David & Goliath main event. And then the main event goes and just has a layout the same as any other guys in the fed.

PAS: Agree with Eric, this was Cage trying to prove he could work at the same speed as Puma, while Puma is trying to throw suplexes. Big Ryck is a much smarter worker, and this match would have been way better if Cage worked it like he worked the vignette street fight. Did like some of the spots, and the finish with the nasty Konan blade job ruled, but I wanted the match to be better.

ER: So that mystery Asian woman may be a vampire. I would actually kind of love if they added in a From Dusk Til Dawn crossover story, because why not. Who will Matanza (?) be? Will he be immortal? Whatever the case I loved how Dario sold this whole exchange. I think this was actually my favorite episode of the series so far.

PAS: I wonder if Matanza is the monster being kept in the basement with the key. I wonder who is going to play him, seems like they already have too many giant characters, although Kongo Kong would be awesome in this fed


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Lucha Underground Episode 11: Last Luchador Standing Workrate Report

1. Cortez Castro & Mr. Cisco vs. Pimpinela Escarlata & Mascarita Sagrada

ER: I've actually been liking Cisco a lot during his LU run and I thought he looked great in this. He bumps way bigger than Cortez and I think he has a bunch of really great offense. He takes moves way better than the other guys and this match was a good showcase for that, as Pimpi has a few moves that require both heels to bump at the same time and Cisco always looked better. Sagrada was also downplayed as he hits a couple ranas and a flip dive (which B-Boy bumps terribly and makes it look like he got barely grazed with a Nerf football). I like how the rudos isolate him and make the most of the size disadvantage. I still like what Pimpi is bringing to the fed (even though I've seen him getting dumped on a lot). I always think he looks fine and again, Cisco made a lot of his stuff look great.

PAS: I really enjoyed this, the crew added in a lot of nasty looking cheap shots, and Pimpi may not have the athletic juice of his younger days, he still knows how to lay it in, time comebacks and elicit sympathy. I am adding my voice to the praising of Cisco. What the fuck happened to B-Boy? He was always a guys who's instincts I questioned a bit, but his execution was always good, he has looked awful in every moment of action in this fed, did he have a stroke or something?

ER: Post match and everybody turns on Big Ryck and jumps him, brutally burning his eye with his own cigar. Nasty stuff. I'm not sure what to make of the turn but Ryck seems an odd guy to be a babyface in this promotion as it's a little tough to regularly get behind a guy who won't be an underdog in any situation. Maybe Cueto digs the "strength in numbers" thing but still curious about storyline reasons for Dario paying fat stacks of cash to take out the other guy he was paying cash. Striker is still WWE conditioned as he states Ryck has been taken to a "medical facility".

PAS: I have enjoyed the look and vibe of the backstage stuff in this fed, but the motivations have often been lacking. Cueto has great delivery, but nothing he does makes any sense. What happened to the monster he had locked up anyway? Why did he pay one group of thugs to take out another thug he payed to take out John Morrison? I am worried we are getting the same lazy writing that has plagued wrestling for the last 20 years, with a slightly flashier package.

ER: Cage interview sure wasn't much. This man has not been given the gift of speech. He had an almost comically bad delivery. Vampiro looked absurd, like Vic Mackey going under cover to stop a Byz Lats drug ring.

PAS: I like Vampiro as an aggressive interviewer. He is better in that role, than at commentary.

2. Super Fly vs. Pentagon Jr.

ER: Kind of an aimless match with a couple of cool spots. A lot of this was centered around Pentagon attacking Super Fly's leg, and Super Fly yelling about his battered leg, but outside of yelling and holding his leg after getting kicked it never seemed to bother him too much. We do get a bunch of fun superkicks that just made me want a Chris Adams style superkick match, and Pentagon does his brutal dropkick to a moonsaulting opponent, but this didn't add up to much for me.

PAS: I liked this more then Eric. Pentagon is at his best as a nasty asskicker, and I like him beating on dudes better then flying around trying to match spot for spot with guys like Fenix.


3. Sexy Star vs. Mariachi Loco

ER: This felt like the kind of match they should have had when Sexy Star debuted. Instead this match was spent acting like Star has always been an equal to her male counterparts, when they could have just done something like this the first week and had it established that she's equal. That said I liked this match and Star's comebacks and offensive runs were logical, and she even brought some stiff work especially with some kicks to the face. I dug all her armdrags and her capitalizing on Mariachi's mistakes made sense in the match.

PAS: Yeah this was pretty good, Sexy Star was really laying it in, and Marachi Loco was good too as a bumbling heel bumping around. Not really sure where they are going with her now that the Chavo feud is over, but I wouldn't mind Pimpi turning heel and a feud between those two.

4. Last Luchador Standing: King Cuerno vs. Drago

ER: Well this was disappointing, but I'm also a guy who dislikes Last Man Standing matches more than a lot of people. It's a stip that just constantly interrupts the action, with a big move and then lying around waiting. There have been LMS matches that I've enjoyed but usually with me it just ends up getting in the way of what could have been a fine normal match. And it doesn't help when you have a goofy ending where apparently it counts as a guy not being able to stand, when the other guy is physically preventing him from doing so? That took what could have been a brutal finish in a No DQ match, into a confusing finish. Both guys have shown a good rhythm together, and this stip took away that rhythm, as instead of a grueling match it just came across as a restart after every move. We still got big spots like the Cuerno tope and a sick Michinoku Driver to the floor, I just don't think overall the stip helped them.

PAS: I didn't mind the pacing as much as Eric, Cuerno is already deliberate, which is what I like about him, so the pauses kind of worked with the pacing of his matches. The pace differences is what I like about this series. Still that was a pretty dumb finish. Especially if this was supposed to end the feud. This show had some fun action, but it really made me question their booking


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Lucha Underground Episode 9: Aztec Warfare Workrate Report

PAS: One match show with no backstage vignettes which does take away a bit from the camp part of the show I enjoy so much. Aztec Warfare was a Royal Rumble with pinfalls and submissions which allowed guys to do dives, and we got a bunch of them. Lots of crazy flips, but again my favorite was Cuerno's bullet tope which was a missile. They did a nice job of weaving a bunch of stories through the match, the Chavo v. Sexy Star stuff, finishing how they started with Puma and Mundo. It had a very Pat Patterson rumble feel to it. Loved Ryck obliteration Sagrada, they really should have done a stretcher job. I also liked how they protected Ryck and Muertes by having them take multiple kill shots before going down.  Just solid stuff, which makes me intrigued about where they go forward

ER: "Aztec Warfare continues to change wrestling as we know it," said Matt Striker, 4 minutes into what was introduced as "the most brutal match in existence". But it's a Royal Rumble with pinfalls instead of over the top rope eliminations. They've had a couple of pretty violent matches in their short history so the build up and hype for what turned out to be a battle royal was kind of perplexing. I don't love the idea of one match taking up a whole episode, but I thought overall it worked as a large collection of spots. I did get majorly burnt out on Mundo by the end of this, especially his ultra athletic bumping. Most of the times his bumps feel really disconnected from the actual moves he is taking. It's like he takes the move, and there's a split second pause before he just does a flip. The worst was taking a nice rana from Sexy Star, he just stood afterwards and then somersaulted on his own. There were many moments of stuff just like this. A whole episode of Mundo is too mucho. But, he did blast Katrina with a crazy kick while she was on the apron, that might have gotten the biggest cheer of the entire match. Kind of came out of nowhere and made a big sound, great spot. Also felt like this match played like an In Memoriam to the superkick. Like this is the last time they were using it, so everybody was required to do a few of them. You could probably put together a pretty compelling tribute video of all the superkicks in this match, complete with Sarah MacLachlan's "Angel" playing over it. There had to be 30+ superkicks in this. It also drove me completely bonkers how Striker pronounced Blue Demon Jr. BLOO-dee-MOAN! BLOO-dee-MOAN. Just say Demon. Say fucking Demon. His emphasis is so fucking bizarre, it's like weird old movies from the 30s where they have foreign actors reading English words they don't know. I do love Vampiro pointing out stupid match strategy like breaking up pinfalls, and giving a logical reason for guys laying around all the time.

Still there was plenty about the match to like. I'd have to be a negative jerk to feel my time watching this was wasted. Almost all of the guys in here got fun moments to shine. I had complained about everybody working even with Sagrada in the last match, and this was like a direct response to me as Fenix dropkicks the shit out of him and Ryck smother clotheslines him to get him out of there quick. Chavo gets to come in and actually work the match logically, by blasting guys with chairs and eliminating them. Although it kind of made everybody else seem pretty stupid to not ever use a chair. I really dug Sexy Star's spots on Chavo, dug Mundo/Puma's 450s to vanquish a distracted and enraged Muertes, Cuerno has the best tope in lucha presently, even dug stuff like Mr. Cisco's chubby full contact sentons. Overall it felt like it was the end of a chapter, with some new stories beginning and others working towards more of a blow off, which makes for satisfying episodic television.


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Lucha Underground Episode 8: A Unique Opportunity Workrate Report

1. 10 Man 1 Fall to Finish

ER: Dug Cueto hiding his shiner behind a pair of big shades. So I thought this was a battle royal, but then they explained the rules that first pinfall wins it, so really it was more like a 10 man scramble. This match both worked for me and did not work for me. There were some really fun moments. I liked Havoc's stuff with Puma, dug Cuerno's flattening tope, Havoc had some crazy high speed Space Flying Tiger Something into a crowd of people, tons of fun spots and go go go. What I couldn't stand about it was that everybody was on a completely equal plane and there was no established hierarchy. In the first 7 weeks the show did a nice job of establishing a hierarchy. We knew the top of the food chain and the bottom. Here everybody was the same. Mariachi Loco got more showcase spots than King Cuerno. Sagrada worked equally with Big Ryck. The Sagrada shit is really starting to annoy me at this point. Not only does everybody in the fed now work equal to him, but he sells less than any worker in the fed.  He'll take a move that would put a larger worker down, but when he takes it he's already moving into position to hit his next spot. The novelty is still there for most of the crowd so I get the push, but the novelty is over for me and seeing him put over so strongly over more believable, capable workers is just strange to my eyes.

PAS: Lots of fun dives in this, but this would have been a below average ROH scramble, it really needed Dixie to give it some structure. I don't get what Son of Havoc's deal is, he was a thug biker who was getting humiliated, and now he is breaking out the craziest high flying spots of the match. If they wanted Matt Cross to do his stuff, give him a different gimmick. Individually fun stuff, and I liked the end run with Puma and Fenix, although I am not sure how that singles match is going to work.

ER: Another Cage promo. "I am not a man, I am a machine." A machine that manufactures triceps tears, I imagine.

2. Boyle Heights Battle Royal

ER: Okay this is the battle royal. So another 10 people but more traditional "feet touch the floor" rules. And for a battle royal it was okayish. I like how Sexy Star went after Chavo until she was eliminated, how she had the blinders on to the rest of things and just wanted his blood. Mundo did his standard "guy who can't be eliminated" schtick, always hanging on during potential eliminations. Vampiro made me laugh one of the times he hung on by dropping "If Fit Finlay were in this he would have kicked Mundo's lungs out through his chest right now." I'm not sure what it had to do with anything, but he's probably right, and I kind of would like a regular "What Would Finlay Do" updates during matches. Shoot, any wrestler ever could think WWFD and it would always make them a better wrestler. Last week Vampiro randomly brought up his Wrestle Society X match with X-Pac (the best match of that promotion's run), so who knows what other surprises lurk in his brain. The ending went on a little too long for me, felt like an endless series of Mundo getting almost tossed, then getting back in. Plus once it was down to Mundo and a couple others we got a bunch of really bad Mundo offense. Really bad knees from the clinch (a couple really whiffed by 2 feet), floppy kicks to nowhere, pretty flashy bunch of nothing.

PAS: I don't mind Mundo's goofy stuff, and the last three with Chavo, Mundo and Muertes was pretty neat. Chavo taking that German suplex like Kenta Kobashi was pretty crazy. Chavo has been so good in this fed so far, I really hope he gets something interesting to do. Still it was a battle royal, and had the flaws of a battle royal.

3. Mil Muertes vs. Fenix

ER: This match didn't do tons for me either. Dario's pre-match promo was kind of clunky, taking the scenic route to get to his announcement of AZTEC WARFARE, which is the most dangerous and extreme match EVER devised…and I suppose we'll find out what it actually is in a few weeks when they come back after the holidays. Fenix and Muertes didn't match up very well, with Muertes have to stand around for some silly offense (the worst offender being a dorky handspring into a diamond cutter). I just wasn't feeling this one.

PAS: Fenix gets really exposed in singles matches, and Muertes isn't a great opponent for him. Nothing much to see here.

PAS: I did love Dario backstage with the belt. "I know you like to break pretty things" is a pretty bad ass line, really looking forward to this surprise.


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Lucha Underground Episode 7: The Top of the Ladder Workrate Report

Danny Trejo is in the house for this episode!

1. Super Fly vs. King Cuerno

PAS: Super Fly shows up on Lucha Underground with a mask four days after losing it in Mexico, they should probably coordinate that stuff better. This was a fun match, with Super Fly being good in the role of enhancement guy. His Space Flying Tiger Drop was pretty great looking. Pretty much just a set up for more Cuerno v Drago, but I liked it

ER: This was a fun extended Cuerno showcase. Cuerno has nice stomps, which is not really something anybody has anymore. When you think about it the stomp used to be a pretty common thing for a bad guy to do, but you just don't see many guys using them anymore. At least the guys doing them are apparently doing them with pride. So I didn't have much problems with it in the past episodes, but pretty sure we can officially get rid of the vertical hanging camera. I don't think it adds to any shots, and often it takes away from them. Here Cuerno took what looked like a cool bump to the floor but you couldn't really get a feel for the gravity of it with the overhead shot.

PAS: Pentagon Jr. vignette was fun. I don't really get violent Ninja warrior from what he is doing so far, but I liked the Kung Fu B-Movie feel.

ER: Oh man the zoom in on the victim when Pentagon Jr. breaks the poor guy's arm during a sparring session was hilarious. He's like a villain in Bloodsport or something. Also laughed at the dual superman punch by two Aztec warriors on a sunset hillside.

2. Fenix v. Chavo Guerrero Jr.

ER: Did not love this, although it actually had a bunch of individual moments that I liked. I loved the spot where Fenix was taking Chavo apart with leg kicks and Chavo levels him with a clothesline. Fenix took the clothesline great. Loved Chavo twisting his boot on Fenix's mask. Loved Pentagon's interference. But it was very disjointed and at the end felt like a bunch of things happened, but it didn't add up to a lot. We've talked about how Fenix has trouble stringing his big spots together as he doesn't seem to know what to do between the big moments. We had the return of the overhead camera shot as I had no idea what happened with a miscommunication spot, as both men ran towards the ropes but Chavo ended up falling through them to the floor or…something. It looked clunky from that camera, and it's possible it was a bad looking spot that looked worse than clunky when shot normally, so they opted for the overheard traffic cam, but either way I'm no fan. Also did not like the Chavo reversal spot on Fenix's big double knees from the top. Almost every reversal spot I've ever seen from a top rope move looks bad, as the reverser ends up taking the full brunt of the move, then just rolls through to do his thing as if the move didn't happen. Here Chavo takes the double knees, then just grabs a half crab. It "looked cool" but it also made the double knees (which I thought was a pretty great spot) look like garbage. I get those moves being risky, but the risk shouldn't be "ah HA! You hit the move flush but *I* just chose to ignore that even happened!!"

PAS: I really enjoyed Chavo in this, as I think he is pretty good in the rudo base roll against high flyers, and I liked the double knee reversal thing, I buy if you know something is coming you can brace yourself and prep a roll through. Fenix is sort of a mess though, he has some cool highspots, but they aren't any cooler then Drago or Puma and he looks very lost in between them, and that is with a vet like Chavo and editing, he is obviously being built for bigger things in this fed and I am not sure he can live up to them

ER: We get a Cage vignette which is really nothing more than a throwaway UFC pre-fight video, with him flipping tractor tires and doing bicep curls. Brian Cage is a huge gassed up guy who 18 months ago was about 50 pounds of muscle lighter. This is an extreme case of wrestling body dysmorphia. He still has some surprising agility that occasionally breaks through the layers of mass, kind of like early super gassed era Scott Steiner. You know, how most of the time he looked like a guy who couldn't properly put his arms down at his sides, but would from time to time break out some impressive things the way he used to. I've seen Cage look good in matches, and I've seen matches hurt by his newfound physique. Curious to see how he does here.

PAS: I had kind of assumed the key was to unlock the Brian Cage, but him in this vignette seem to suggest that he is going to be used in a different way. With Cage and Big Ryck it is weird that this lucha fed has more roid monsters then the WWE.

3. Big Ryck vs. Johnny Mundo vs. Prince Puma ($100,000 LADDER MATCH)

ER: Ladder match is starting at just the 30 minute mark of the episode which seems kind crazy, but intriguing (but made more sense when the show went off the air at the 54 minute mark). But by the end of this match I was still just kinda bored. Everything I loved about the street fight a couple weeks back was lacking here. All of the run ins and garbage spots in that match felt very organic, and here the run ins operated much more on super obvious spot set up. All the garbage spots were integrated really seamlessly into the street fight, and here the set up for all of them was clunky and obvious. Plenty of great individual moments, such as Puma's cool dive through the ladder, and an ESPECIALLY  awesome Steamboat Bill  spot with Puma and a falling ladder. Never seen that before outside the magic of the cinemaplex and I fell in love all over again. Puma and Morrison both pulled out some pretty crazy stuff, with Puma breaking a ladder in half by falling through it on the way to the floor, Morrison making a slingshot spot look brutal by going in nose first. But I thought almost all of the run in moments were bad, as opposed to them being a strength like they were in the street fight. The match still had its strengths, and I really liked Big Ryck in this. While the set up for the crazy spots was at times bad, the crazy spots themselves all looked great. The worst thing about the match was the run in. Phil told me afterwards on the phone that it was B-Boy, who I have seen live a bunch (jeeeeez dating back over a DECADE!) and when he ran in Striker was all "who is this some sort of fan or something? Jesus get security out here" and I was rolling my eyes because it sounded like "That's Lance Storm!! HEEEE doesn't work HEREEEE!!!" but then all of this mystery man's strikes looked insanely bad , like he was fake fighting a little kid with progeria and had to be extra gentle, and then he took the worst ever bump off a Mundo superkick, kinda pausing for a goofy "Did I do that!?" look at a camera that wasn't there before falling the wrong direction. After all that I thought "oh shit that HAD to have been a fan, Striker was right!! because clearly a guy who had actual wrestling training wouldn't have looked that bad." But again, Phil told me it was B-Boy. Now, in fairness to B-Boy, maybe he's a method wrestler and really got into his character and thought "okay, you have to look bad. Bad enough for the announcer to confuse you for some lowlife fan. Wear cargo shorts. Pooch out your belly a bit. Throw punches that wouldn't break wet paper. Look like a man who has not had formal training in any sort of occupation, least of all pro wrestling. BEEE that possible fan, running in, confusing announcers." So that's a possibility.

PAS: I liked this but didn't love it. Mundo has looked pretty bad brawling during this entire show, and it was rough when he had to exchange punches. I also thought this went long, I like that give main events this long without commercial breaks, but this dragged a bit. Also kind of silly to have a surprise run in, have it be a guy nowone knows, in a match where there are already lots of non-surprise run ins. Did love all of the big bumps, which were totally crazy, that Puma fall into the ladder was bonkers, and Ryck was great, the set up for the nut shot where he tries to climb two ladders ruled. I always like Big Show in ladder matches and Ryck played a similar roll of a monster totally out of his element, but still dangerous. Nice bump by Cuerto in the post match angle too, that guy is just awesome.


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Angels Pacing, Gently Placing, Roses 'Round Cassandro's Head

~Cassandro/Billy Boy/Fabi Apache/Mini Abismo Negro vs. Cinthia Moreno/Mascarita Sagrada 2007/Pimpinela Escarlata/Super Fly Lumberjack Match, AAA, 10/7/07) - GREAT

All of the AAA minis act as the lumberjacks here and it is just too much fun. Cassandro controlled the whole match, which I've never seen before. He is usually the guy in the role of stealing a match in AAA, not leading a match. He obviously needs to lead matches more, as he was just incredible here. Also, his outfit was an amazing black glittery Zach Ryder-style one-legged pantsuit with roses on it. So rad.

He really does it all here, playing up a maestro role that I've never seen him do, but still squeezing in great comedy moments. He'd roll through a submission sequence (and I've never seen him do many submissions, but he busts out a cool octopus variation and an awesome indian deathlock pin), but then also steals the show when he would get thrown to the floor and run screaming from all the minis trying to attack him. Just a total tour de force performance.

That is not to say the others weren't impressive here as well, as this is amongst the best Billy Boy performances I've ever seen. He shows a lot of passion and character here, and sometimes he can come off as just soooo bland. He has some real fine moments here, though; my favorite being when Super Fly was going for a pin, Billy Boy casually walks in, stops the ref's arm from counting, then turns around and just kicks Fly right in the stomach. Awesome. Fabi and Moreno are also really good in this. They're just so smooth at working spots in and out of all the craziness, and they match up well with both the male workers, and each other. Great, fun match.

~Cassandro/Intocable/Mascara Divina/Pimpinela Escarlata vs. Jesse/Nygma/Polvo de Estrellas/Yuriko (AAA, 12/14/07) - SKIPPABLE

Wow this was awful. I was looking forward to Cassandro and Pimpi teaming, and those guys were definitely NOT the problem in this match. Spice Boy Intocable is bad, but Mascara Divina is just absolutely awful. Every time he gets the chance to shine he just completely blows it. During the end run dive train he opts for a somersault tope and looks like a total load, holding onto the ropes for too long so instead of landing on anybody he just flips over the ropes, lands on his butt on the apron, not close to anybody, then to cover decides to throw a punch that whiffs by about two feet. It just totally falls apart here. Cassandro tried his damndest to hold the dive train together as while everybody is lying around he's the only one trying to catch most of the time. He catches three of the dives himself while all the other chumps are just lying around. Pimpi bails on his dive half way through as two of the Night Queens are just completely out of position. Just a whole big mess. Cassandro has a fun sequence with Yuriko and I'm consistently amused by Yuriko screaming whenever bailing to the floor. But just too little good to recommend this one.

COMPLETE AND ACCURATE CASSANDRO

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Then Cassandro Disintegrates Between a Wall of Clouds

Cassandro/Faby Apache/Mini Abismo Negro/Alfa vs. Pimpinela Escarlata/Cinthia Moreno/Octagoncito/Oriental AAA 7/15/07 - EPIC

I love these matches. Exotico/Lady/Mini/Dude matches always entertain me to no end. Everybody seems to work up a notch and their is always constant action. There always seems to be a game of one-upsmanship going on and this took place at Triplemania, so they were working in front of a pretty large crowd. Pimpi and Cassandro start and Cassandro has a crazy Justin Beiber haircut. He and Pimpi tie up and do a great hair toss sequence where Cassandro's Beiber 'do just comes right off!! Ah, that's right, he lost his hair the night before in a giant cage match that will never ever see the light of day. So Cassandro is totally buzzed under his Bieber wig. His fury and embarrassment over losing his beautiful locks drives him to completely OWN this match, putting on possibly the greatest performance of his I have ever seen. Every time he's in he just does the most insane things known to man. After his initial exchange with Pimp he takes a monstrous bump over the top to the floor at an incredibly fast speed. Later he charges right at Oriental and takes his trademark insane bump off the ring post to the floor. Throw in an out-of-control Asai moonsault and some great miscommunication spots and he was just on fire here.

Cinthia Morena is always really fun and always matches up with smaller guys impressively, and I always love Faby Apache. Mini Abismo Negro bumps all over the place for everybody and Octagoncito does a crazy hurracanrana to the floor. It's all action all the time and there is not one bland moment here.


Cassandro/Pimpinela Escarlata/Super Fly/El Angel vs. Jesse/Nygma/Polvo de Estrellas/Yuriko AAA, 10/26/07 - GREAT

Night Queens are wearing their ridiculous apricot-colored jammies and are all about coming up with new ways to smack the tecnicos with trash cans in this one. They start off by pummeling Super Fly and dumping him butt first in a trashcan, then putting the can up on the apron with him in it, then double baseball slide dropkicking it to the floor with him in it, landing him in all sorts of pain. Pimpi is the next to take the pain of the trash can, as he comes jumping off the ropes and gets clonked in the side of his head while his body goes splaying. We get some fun dive sequences, we get Cassandro and Pimpi doing their stereo sassy ropewalking into a hurracanrana and a flippy armdrag (respectively), followed by them doing an awesome hopscoth double-dutch tandem dance-off ending with a butt bump that makes you jealous that you don't have someone in your life to work on dance routines with you! Yuriko screams hilariously when he is about to take any sort of offense, Jesse wears the most garish pants ever made (some sort of apricot Zubaz pants with apricot plaid patches), and Cassandro KILLS himself at the end going for a dive as trashcans come back into play. Cassandro sets up a huge dive and one of the Queens holds up a trash can at the last second and Cassandro dives INTO the trashcan. He didn't get hit with it, he swooshed right into it and then got stomped while in the damn thing. Cold. Polvo kicks Pimp right in the balls to end it and this was all sorts of awesome.


Cassandro/Pimpinela Escarlata/Billy Boy/Mascara Divina vs. Jesse/Nygma/Polvo de Estrellas/Yuriko AAA, 1/19/08 - SKIPPABLE

Cassandro and Pimpi are wearing their totally awesome black widow spider outfits and Cassandro has the coolest headdress in the history of humans wearing cool headdresses. The match never really gets going. I don't much care for Divina, especially now that he no longer works his "awesome" Televisa Deportes gimmick (which would be the equivalent of a U.S. worker being named ESPN Sportscenter), and Billy Boy doesn't do too much here. Polvo can be kind of a load at times and while there were fun moments, there was also plenty of patented AAA "Show a shot of people in the crowd while clipping". Still, it does have it's moments, but it is rather short and forgettable.

COMPLETE AND ACCURATE CASSANDRO

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