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Monday, February 20, 2017

73 Shockingly Great Berzerker Matches. #54 Will Leave You Speechless!

1. The Viking vs. Tommy Landell - Superstars 1/28/91

"I'm the guy who's gonna get his hands on ya! I'm the guy who's gonna know exactly what to do when he gets his hands on ya! I'm the guy who's gonna conquer the WWF and won't be stopped! I'm the Viking!! Huss! Huss! Huss!" ~The Berzerker

The big Superstars debut, with Nord merely referred to as The Viking, billed from Iceland. Amusingly, he gets a cut screen promo and essentially cuts a promo exactly like Jim Duggan. "I'm the guy who's going to beat you up with my fists!" In 1991 I only knew of Iceland because of Carmen San Diego, but I don't think I pictured their people as a large screaming white man with a Midwest accent threatening a beating with fists. Viking has a pretty awesome debut as he certainly acted like no other wrestler. He quickly boots Landell in the stomach and drops him with a powerslam, then runs the ropes really fast and starts doing back bumps. He drops a big knee, ties Landell in the ropes and then does a brutal running high kick to Landell's chin, then whips him hard into the mat with a front vertical suplex. After, he hits his finisher, which is picking up a man and throwing him over the top rope to the floor, to win by countout. Then he runs the ropes even more, really fast. And then, completely unexpectedly, he hits a freaking plancha on Landell, while Landell hasn't even gotten to his feet!! Nord is a huge guy, and he just launched himself over the top to the floor, essentially splashing a recumbent Landell. Tons of people in the crowd noticeably jump out of their seat, understandably so. I don't think anybody was expecting to see that. Pretty excellent start to our Berzerker love fest.

2. The Viking vs. David Isley - Wrestling Challenge 1/29/91

A pretty by the books Viking match, against owner of a Tarheels starter jacket David Isley. Isley got off a little easier than Landell, but Viking still hit a super high dropkick, awesome falling front slam, big front suplex, and got chucked to the floor. AND, he did his crazy plancha AGAIN! I've never seen this. It's like Super Calo's rolling senton to the floor, except a giant 300+ pound man is just doing a plancha splash while his opponent is lying on the mats. It's insane. He lands in a half splash/half kneedrop, just a pillaging lunatic flinging himself way down onto his opponent. It's a crazy spot for anybody, let alone a man of this size. The next year, Isley did an All Japan tour.

"Mr. Fuji go faaaar and wide, and look what I found: The Viking! So vicious, so rugged, so devious, and only I, Mr. Fuji, can control him" ~Mr. Fuji

3. The Viking vs. Danny Brazil - Superstars 2/18/91

Dude, Dan Brazil. Who. Are. You. This ain't his first rodeo, and he looks a lot like Dennis Stamp. A little grimy, and he leaps out of the way of Viking's dropkick, but makes up for it by standing up to three running big boots. Viking tosses Brazil to the floor, and after he's counted out he does his plancha kneedrop right to Brazil's chest. "Well, that'll end a career," Roddy Piper says nonchalantly.

"Only I can control the Viking. Who is the most cruelest, meanest and wildest wrestler in the WWF? I will turn him loose on EVERYbody!" ~Mr. Fuji

4. The Viking vs. Brian Costello - Wrestling Challenge 2/19/91

Viking tries a couple new things here, mainly a huge flying shoulderblock, coming in fully horizontal at Costello's head. He does his great falling front slam, ties Costello in the ropes and delivers two big boots (except Costello is short, and usually Viking gets the boot under their chin so they spring back and forth in the ropes. Here he just clonks Costello in the forehead a couple times and Costello doesn't move a lot). He tosses him to the floor for the count out win, then does an awesome kneedrop plancha to his gut. The kneedrop plancha will never not be awesome. In 1994 Costello would get to go on a tour of All Japan, even teaming up a few times with some guy named John Nord.

"Berzerker make Mr. Fuji VERY proud. He a little crazy, like Mr. Fuji, and make opponents suffer hahaha." ~Mr. Fuji

5. Berzerker vs. Jim Kolhep - Superstars 3/26/91

This starts with Berzerker throwing a lariat at the back of Kolhep's head, then bulldozing him around with 3 JYD headbutts. Berzerker throws a big boot to Kolhep's chest, takes a couple back bumps, then plants him with that front slam, twice! Kolhep takes a nasty spill, getting tossed to the floor almost past the mats into the entrance way. Berzerker makes up the difference by just crashing into him off the plancha shoulder/side first. He landed flush on Kolhep and then HUSS'd off into the good night.

6. Berzerker vs. John Allen - Prime Time Wrestling 3/26/91

Allen is a bigger guy and takes some great flop bumps. And this is really go go go and a high end squash. Berzerker delivers two falling front slams, super high dropkick, tons of big boots, does a fabulous JYD headbutt to Allen's ribs (and he really didn't hold back on it, just flew into him head first without pulling it), and really boots Allen under the chin a couple times while tied in the ropes. Allen was a good sport here. And after the match Berzerker does his best (so far) plancha to the floor, just splatting a prone Allen.

7. Berzerker vs. Dan Robbins - Superstars 4/15/91

Dan Robbins looked like an early 20s version of a kid roaming around a trailer park with a Koolaid mustache. He's got a 1991 John Daly style chopped blonde mullet, but with a full dark brown beard, and a couple high bicep tattoos that don't look like much of anything, but you know they weren't well thought out. He's also a crummy bumper, taking things rigid and not believable. Berzerker hits a great over the shoulder powerslam, and does what looks like a shoot biel, as Robbins doesn't help him at all and it looks like Berzerker just picking up and throwing the guy. Robbins does get tossed to the floor nicely, and Berzerker does an awesome rolling knee drop plancha.

8. Berzerker vs. Randy Fox - Wrestling Challenge 4/16/91

Fox is a lean and muscular guy with a great head of hair on him, looking like same-period Steve Vai. And Berzerker must despise guitar histrionics as he charges hard at Fox and just headbutts him in the stomach, pushing Fox all the way into the buckles with just his head. I've never seen that before. He just treated Fox like a tackling dummy, and then tackled him with his damn head. Then kicked him in the face. Huge chokeslam, then he violently ties Fox in the ropes and clonks him with a couple boots (begging his master Fuji to let him do a second one). Fox gets tossed to the floor and bounces around off the guardrail in comical floppy ways. Berzerker does a slingshot bombs away from the ring to the floor, then does a couple back bumps back in the ring. Poor Randy Fox.

9. Berzerker vs. British Bulldog - UK Rampage 4/24/91

This was a shockingly long and shockingly Berzerker-dominated match. This match goes 16 minutes! That's an awful lot of time, and much of it is spent with Berzerker in control, totally dominating Smith. Smith would get occasional hope spots but they would mostly get shut down, almost immediately. Berzerker hadn't been in WWF very long at this point, and hadn't had any televised matches against "name talent", so it's surprising they'd let him have a 16 minute match against Smith, who I imagine was one of the big draws on this show. That's a big position for him to be put in. But maybe they knew something nobody else knew, as he was awesome here. The first thing that jumps out is just how massive he is, really towering over Bulldog. And the whole match is just Berzerker crushing Bulldog, hitting shoulderblocks, legdrops, locking him in a nice cravate, big bearhug, booting him in the face, hitting a couple powerslams, etc. He also showed how huge a bumper he was, taking three separate, increasingly crazy bumps to the floor. The first was off a clothesline and was his trademark fast flip back over the ropes and landing feet first on the floor. I'm still blown away by this bump as I've never seen a guy his size take it this way, this quickly, this wildly. He did another one later that was even faster. But his craziest bump comes when he ties Bulldog up in the ropes, doing his trademark big boots to a trapped opponent. He hits a couple, comes running in really fast for another, Davey Boy moves and Berzerker misses a high speed running boot over the top to the floor. Absolutely insane spot. Later he takes a mammoth backdrop bump, getting more height than maybe anybody I've seen, as if he was Zach Gowen getting launched by Brock Lesnar. Just crazy. Berzerker even hits an all time great piledriver, letting Bulldog think about it for a long time and just planting him. A truly great piledriver. So the match had plenty of great moments, and Berzerker looked really great, but there really wasn't enough drama to justify the long run time. For dominating as long as he did, Berzerker never really got any convincing nearfalls. And while he fed into Davey Boy's end of match comeback nicely (loved the missed shoulderblock into the buckles to set up a powerslam), it did feel that after a while they were just killing time - a lot of time - until Davey Boy's inevitable comeback. Still, I love that they trusted him to go out there and give them 16 minutes, and considering how little Bulldog did it was a pretty impressive time fill.

10. Berzerker vs. Jim Powers - Prime Time Wrestling 4/30/91

Powers gets a full entrance and sprints to the ring, surely wanting his beating to be done quicker. Berzerker does little frog hops around the ring and does shadow karate. He hits a big boot and bigger leg drop (surprised they let someone the same size as Hogan use a legdrop as just a throwaway move), then starts working over Powers' knee with JYD headbutts!!!! That is awesome!! Just headbutting Powers right in the hammy. He whips Powers into the ropes and catches a Powers crossbody with a chokeslam! Just yanked him out of the air and dropped to his knee with a chokeslam. So awesome. Powers tries dropkicking Berzerker in the knee, but aims too low and just looks like he slid terribly into 3rd. Berzerker covers for him by just kneedropping him. Powers goes for a crossbody, gets caught again, this time with the falling front slam. IMPORTANT: Berzerker wins the first match I've seen of his by pinfall, after hitting a killer kneedrop from the middle rope. History, right there.

"I'm going to turn him loose on EVERYbody in the World Wrestling Federation! HAhahahaha!" ~Mr. Fuji

11. Berzerker vs. Gary Jensen - Superstars 5/6/91

One of the least notable Berzerker matches so far. Jensen has a hard time staying on his feet, really staying down selling far too long. Berzerker clubs him, Jensen stays down for 15 seconds, so Berzerker frog hops around the ring. He hits a killer powerslam and does then bombs away plancha, and Jensen takes a decent bump off the toss to the floor, but this was low end on the Berzerker squash totem.

More tomorrow!!

COMPLETE & ACCURATE BERZERKER