Lucha Underground Episode 33: Death vs. The Dragon Review

ER: Kinda lost a little interest in LU for a couple weeks, got a little burnt out. That episode with Sexy Star vs. Pentagon kinda took a bit out of me, made me more interested in checking out other things for a few weeks. So naturally, Sexy Star is in the first fucking match when I decide to dive back in. Super Fly is good in the pre-match interview, talking about how he wanted Pentagon to break her arm, to feel the pain that he felt, but then Vampiro had to get into the ring and stop him.

1. Sexy Star vs. Super Fly

ER: And this was not good. Super Fly worked pillowy soft gentle on Sexy Star, really pulling back on every single thing he did. Even the end powerbomb looked like he was gently setting down an antique nightstand while helping his mom move. Every elbow drop, senton, thigh slap kick, all of it looked like fake fighting John Cena would do when visiting a Make-a-Wish kid with Brittle Bone Disease. Sexy Star for her part looked predictably garbage. She fell way short on several of her moves, requiring Super Fly to run towards her to catch the move. I don't know how he managed to save one of her top rope armdrags. She was going to land nowhere near him, and he managed to sprint ahead, catch her arm and believably take an armdrag. He worked a miracle right there. So yes, we get Sexy Star getting handled like a delicate Faberge egg, and Fly having to push the boundaries of believability just to take any of her offense. You know, it was a reallll Sexy Star match!

PAS: I liked Super Fly's outside of the ring bump, he is a pretty bland guy, but a solid wrestler. Would have been a good guy to throw under the Disciple of Death gimmick rather then the guys they are using. Still Sexy Star is atrocious and this was by far her longest match and worse performance. She would be a bottom five WWE diva, and there are tons better luchadoras who could have this gimmick.

ER: So Pentagon is going full force into a feud with tubby Vampiro. Super Fly just beat Sexy Star fairly easy. Pentagon needed Fly's help to beat her. Now he's going to feud with a guy who can barely move. I'm not loving the direction for Pentagon right here, especially considering where he was just 4-6 episodes ago.

2. Aerostar vs. Cage vs. The Mack vs. Marty the Moth

ER: Those medallions reallllly look like the Legends of the Hidden Temple medallions. If they bring in some Temple guards to lurk in the shadows, I'd go full thumbs up. I'm not even asking for Olmec here. Just give me some Temple guards jumping out and scaring kids. This fed really knows how to work satisfying 4 way matches, and this was no different. Even with The Moth's brand of "comedy" and some lesser stuff from Cage, this still easily worked. Mack had maybe his best LU showing yet, every single thing he did looked awesome. His strikes put Cage's to shame, his bumping was great, all of his impressive spots looked impressive. I mean dear lord that overheard belly to belly he gave Cage on the apron was just crazy for both men to pull off. Willie Mack is like the perfect 4 way spotfest worker. He is truly the ideal LU guy. Aerostar hit some nice stuff including a wild triple jump flip dive. Moth almost took a header on his dive and I guess takes a beating okay. I dunno. His brand of comedy was not really what I was looking for from LU.

PAS: I really liked this, and didn't even mind the Moth as much as Eric did, I thought his dive was pretty cool, and I dig his sleazeball comedy, he is less Colt Cabana then John Tatum. The Mack was incredible here and I am really looking forward to his big Cage match as those guys clearly have worked each other a ton, and are going to go crazy on a big stage. Cage is a hit or miss dude with me usually, but he was pretty dope here, I loved him doing curls with Aeorstar before chucking him over the top.

ER: My god. The lightning in that segment. Lightning which grows slow moving wrestlers with ABS. That happened. Catrina is good in these kind of segments, though it feels like if I were an acting coach I would regularly be telling her "you're acting through your nostrils too much. Less nostrils."

PAS: It was pretty dumb, I hated Papa Shango, and I don't like this either.

3. Drago vs. Mil Muertes

ER: Hernandez jumps Drago before the bell and looks really vicious doing so. Really got over how weak Drago was going to be going into the match against Muertes. Hernandez' hammer blow to the back looked especially brutal. So Drago is weakened for the match, and because of that the match was merely decent. It was certainly not bad. Muertes looked like a monster, hitting a ridiculously awesome spear/double leg, tossing Drago into chairs and bouncing chairs off his body, nasty powerbomb onto the announcer table, etc. They got a little crossed up in the middle and were doing some awkward walking around to get into proper position, but they eventually got nicely back on track. I dug Muertes being the one to roll through Drago's (up until now) sure thing victory roll-up, and his blows to Drago's back after rolling through looked tough. Good for the goal it set out to do, and I'm definitely down for seeing Muertes/Puma.

PAS: This was an extended squash, but Murtes is really great at these squashes where a guy gets in a couple of big hope spots before getting murked. There was a little awkwardness, but the violence of it totally made up for it. The stuff with the chairs was next level awesome, all the broken wood and shards made it look like an earthquake hit the set.

ER: At least the show got the shit out of the way early, but my oh my was that Sexy Star match shit. Easily a contender for worst match in LU history. There have maybe been shorter matches that were more offensive, but this was given a little time and my god did she just look so horrible. But we got that out of the way early, and the rest of the show was a keeper.

PAS: 2 out of 3 ain't bad at all, and both of the good matches were very good


LUCHA UNDERGROUND MASTER LIST


 

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CMLL Worth Watching 5/10/15 & 6/19/15

Comandante Pierroth, Tiger & Sagrado vs. Fuego, The Panther & Blue Panther Jr. (5/10/15)

Man I dug this. Pierroth has been one of my favorite CMLL guys this year, real high energy ass kicker who always wings nasty clubbing shots, stomps guys into oblivion, jumps all over them while stomping them, breaks out some nice slams, etc. He's like a throwback Dinamita. As in, if you've been missing Mascara Ano 2000, Cien Caras or Universo 2000 on your TV (and I have been), Pierroth has been an oddly, unexpectedly great fill-in this year. Sagrado as a rudo is the only worthwhile stuff he has done in his entire career. This guy was just a clueless tecnico, always tripping over himself, and now suddenly he looks capable, has nice presence, takes a tope like a man (god did Panther just snap Sagrado's back over the barrier on a tope) and hits a mean piledriver to end the primera (say aren't those things sorta illegal down there?). BP Jr. is pretty green and can't really work long sequences, but he hits a nice dive in the tercera, and the greenness of BP's kids works to the match's advantage, as the segunda has a satisfying finish with the rudos getting cocky, chasing BP Jr. and Fuego up the ramp, allowing Panther to get a surprise roll up on Pierroth as he roots on his goons. Tiger sold the loss great, like he could not believe they lost even one fall to these wimps. Real satisfying story here, and the work fit the match nicely.

Blue Panther, Maximo & Marco Corleone vs. Euforia, Niebla Roja & Gran Guerrero (5/10/15)

You've probably seen some combination of this trios a dozen times, but sometimes guys show up a bit more spirited than other times, and this was one of those times. I always love Panther but spirited Panther is just the best. Here he works a nice long opening mat sequence with GG, which was arguably the most interesting thing GG has ever been involved in. Panther has a million reversals and the way he rolls through into various grapevines and leverage moves always leaves me slack-jawed. We don't get any dives in this, and the falls go quick, but the tecnicos amusingly must have decided before the match to see who could throw the nicest/neatest arm drag. Panther throws more in this match than I've seen him in years, including one where he gets tilt-a-whirled by Roja into performing an upside down arm drag on Euforia; Maximo throws some nice rolling ones too, one springing high off the top rope and another rolling over Roja's back. Even Marco throws a shockingly good one while rolling over Euforia's back. Marco's punches have been looking kinda lackluster this year, and here he breaks out some nice ones as he pinballs his fists back and forth between Roja and Euforia. Kind of a one sided affair for the tecnicos, but everybody busted ass and it's stunning to see Panther so spry at 54.

Stuka Jr., Angel de Oro & Super Porky vs. Barbaro Cavernario, Felino & Okumura (6/19/15)

So I'm not sure this is very good, but "worth watching" and "very good" are two different things, and I thought this was worth watching, more for its parts than its sum. Firstly, Porky takes FOUR bumps in the primera. This feels noteworthy to me. Porky is a guy who goes to great lengths to avoid bumping. Yet here he's splatting all over the mat for shoulderblocks and lariats. Think of the effort it takes him to stand up from a back bump!!! And here he does it 4 times in about 40 seconds. I admittedly starting writing this up right after witnessing that. I had made up my mind to immediately include it in a "worth watching" list. Beyond that we got one of the better Oro performances, as he hits a couple very impressive flying spots, and then spikes himself on an Okumura apron DDT. We get a Kemonito apron splash, Porky doing a seated senton to the rudos on the rampway, Felino not acting like current Felino (including getting heat from starting the match wearing his mask and jawing with the Arena Mexico old people) and Stuka Jr. doing his awesome bullet splash. It's like 8 minutes of your life, and it will bring you joy.

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