Segunda Caida

Phil Schneider, Eric Ritz, Matt D, Sebastian, and other friends write about pro wrestling. Follow us @segundacaida

Saturday, May 21, 2011

CLASSIC PHIL and TOMK- Other Japan Matches from DVDVR 165

14. Atsushi Onita vs Masashi Aoyagi 10/6/89 FMW -Tomk

This is the main event of your first FMW show and is awesome. FMW at this point really isn't a garbage fed. I'm not sure what exactly it is, but it's not a garbage fed yet. Opening match is a lucharesu jr vs a guy in a mask who kind of wrestles like Ricky Rice and then there are a couple of matches between US wrestlers vs guys in gis, then a fat US women vs. three joshi girls and then there is this main event. This is worked as rounds style MMA v wrestling match. These basically need to follow a simple formula: one guy controls first round, opponent gets to answer in second round and then all hell breaks loose in third. It's simple formula. We watched a lot of these (in UWF and elsewhere) in putting this set of DVDs together and this is really one of the best.

Part of what makes this match so neat is that you have essentially a split crowd. Normally when people talk about Onita, the talking point is that he's extremely charismatic guy who knows how to milk that charisma. Normally in those conversations, people are referring to Onita's work as babyface. Here he really isn't the babyface. Match starts with Aoyagi getting presented with something like 8 flower bouquets from various women and children. Onita gets one bouquet as he watches the other women file past him. Aoyagi gets whole heap of streamers , while Onita gets one diffident one. And the crowd feels like its mostly made up of Aoyagi supporters, family of students, whatever. If WWF and WCW collapsed in the early nineties I imagine Flair would have spent the last decade working main events against local football coaches (former high school stars now coaching). These would be built around Flair working heel until coach finally gets three point stance and spears Flair. Maybe a more athletic coach would get to string together a shouldertackle, spear and flying tackle. There are large chunks of this match that feel like that fantasy Flair match.

First round is all Onita dominating through cheap shots, while Aoyagi maintains his dignity. Onita attacks before the bell, kicks at students, chokes, hits behind the head, kicks Aoyagi when he's down, etc. Aoyagi does some Dustyish "come on" challenges but really has too much dignity to fight back against the cheap shots and round ends with Onita chucking Aoyagi into his corner post bell.

Second round is all Aoyagi just wasting Onita with kicks and punches, while Onita bails and has to be protected by the ref. Onita gets one string of offense while ref holding Aoyagi back, Onita hits him with (an illegal?) lariat and then dropkicks Aoyagi out of ring, Aoyagi gets back into ring and again wastes Onita working him over like a heavybag. This would be the coach hits his tackles section, Flair would have done the beg off into low blow instead of the ref separating lariat.

Onita and Aoyagi go for the all hell breaks loose third fall. This is worked more give and take then the other rounds. Punches and kicks are exchanged until ref struggles to separate, Onita hits big suplex for Aoyagi to answer with big koppo kick...back and forth. Aoyagi says fuck maintaining my dignity, and spends the third round shrugging off the ref, kicking and punching Onita when he's down, chasing Onita into the crowd when Onita bails, and eventually throwing off the Gi. Aoyagi gets busted open for chasing Onita into the crowd and Onita tries to headbutt Aoyagi out of ring.

Onita lays on the mat between third and fourth round and they run a fourth fall where the towel finally gets thrown in..and you have Aoyagi busted open some more and a giant pull apart where Aoyagi's seconds and Onita's seconds get involved eventually leading Tarzan Goto, dressed in a cabana shirt and white pants looking like a villain from Wiseguy, to come in and slap Onita for disappointing his dojo. Fucking awesome.

15. Kazuo Yamazaki vs Nobuhiko Takada 9/11/85 UWF Phil

When these two were at their best in this set, it really was working young upstart against a strong veteran. Yamazaki working off Fujiwara and Takada working off of Meada and Backlund were really able to show their strengths and allow the veterans to work off of their fire and selling. Putting them against each other though, really creates the lucha problem of matching up two highflyers. They are both young firey underdogs, so you get kind of a mirror match, lots of sound and fury signifying nothing.
The opening matwork time killing section of this was pretty dull as UWF1 time killing matwork tended to be. They do a double spill to the floor, and then the last half of the match is pretty much all action. This really was a juniors match in pacing, and had some of the flaws of that style. Both guys doing lots of fancy stuff, for close near falls, but no real build. The stuff at the beginning doesn't lead to the stuff at the end, and neither guy ever really gets an advantage until the match ends.
However I can see why people liked this match more then I did. To be fair to it, the stuff is pretty great stuff. While both guys tended to be hit and miss with their stiffness on this set, they were bringing it here. The kicks thudded, and both guys did a great job both selling the impact of individual moves, and the cumulative effect of the shots. The first big highkick by Yamazaki was a spectacular shot, and the spectacular shots kept coming. Both guys are also really great at coming up at 9, or milking a submission right up to a rope break. The last half of this did have great individual things about it, it just didn't feel like much of a total match to me.


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Wattstoberfest Segunda Caida Style

Here are the SC contributions to the failed Wattstoberfest project. WE SHALL RETURN

12. "Gentleman" Chris Adams vs. Terry Taylor 5/3/87-EricR

Nice guys really do finish last. Terry Taylor spent this whole set using bland babyface offense and getting cheered by ladies and then losing. Like a loser. So he knew what he had to do.

This match was really well done and hit all of its intended goals: This was Terry Taylor's heel turn, and they had a 20 minute match to get it over. Taylor does a very nice job of subtley becoming an asshole over those 20 minutes, and it's a real treat to watch. He really starts at the lowest point and builds and slowly incorporates more heel tactics. Taylor basically started working as Flair in this match, right down to the kneedrop out of the corner. The cheating, the begging, the bumping. Real fun stuff.

It started off like most other Taylor matches: some opening matwork that appeared to be going nowhere fast, with Adams getting the duke. But here Taylor starts the subtle shift, showing real disgust and frustration after every break, when Adams keeps 1-upping him with headlock takeovers.

Over the course of the match, Taylor starts to transition to offense off of clean corner breaks. Adams breaks clean, Taylor knees him in the stomach and clubs the back of his neck. Carl Fergie breaks the two in the corner, and Taylor does a GREAT uppercut right to Adams neck.

At this point Taylor is audibly getting booed from the dudes, but still getting cheered by the ladies. I'm not going to do a Meltzer style John Cena boo/cheer percentage, but I thought it was cool that guys in the crowd were slowly like "Wait a minute, Taylor is using underhanded tactics" while the ladies were still chanting "Go Terry, Go!"

The match goes on and once the nearfalls start it gets really good. My favorite spot was when Adams going for a headlock takeover (which he had been hitting all match), and Taylor physically strains his neck forward in the headlock, holds his base, and deadlifts Adams back into an awesome backdrop. It looked really nasty with Taylor looking like he forcibly stopped his body from going over with the takedown, then just snapping Adams backwards. Later in the match Adams does a nasty deadlift backdrop of his own.

The match threatens to fall apart right at the end when Fergie does a strange ref bump/dive combo, essentially doing a face first flop in the middle of the ring. But, Adams conks heads with Fergie and rolls to the outside rattled, and at this point Taylor's facials looking around and seeing his chance was great. Similar situation to their previous match, which Taylor lost by countout. With Fergie still down Taylor goes out and just blasts Adams with a piledriver, then rolls in for the countout win.

By this point the fans are mostly against Taylor, and his tremendous post-match interview seals it. Taylor just acts like a complete unwitting deuche, with Ross and Magnum playing off him really well. "You don't think that was a cheap win?" And Taylor with just a great aloof expression on his face "No! Why would it be?" Then Eddie Gilbert comes out in his amazing acid wash jeans and OP button-up with suspenders, and I thought Magnum was gonna legit beat the shit out of Terry when he said something along the lines of "That wreck really messed you up".

Very well done match and angle.

13. Rock N Roll Express & Hacksaw Duggan vs. Midnight Express & Ernie Ladd 6/8/84-Lee Benaka

Cornette is a heat-magnet from the get-go, grabbing the mic to introduce his team to lots of boos from the Houston crowd. Ernie Ladd, thankfully not dressed for a Republican Party golfing fund-raiser is is the norm for his streetfights, is ready to start with Duggan, but the Express counsel him to leave, so it ends up being Morton and Eaton. Morton gets the best of two exchanges, sending Bobby back to hug Dennis, which inspires some homophobic mockery by Gibson. Dennis comes in and is promptly triple-teamed in the face corner. Eaton's cowardly attempts to save are amusing. Dennis tags in Ladd to work over Morton, and the ladies in the crowd squeal. Ladd lifts him up really high in the air by is hair twice and throws him down. Morton fails to knock down the big man but uses his quickness to get a drop kick in. Morton also gets some quick arm drags on Ladd after Ladd misses a punch. Ladd's subtle cautionary selling is fun to watch also. Morton continues to have his way with dropkicks until Ladd finally kicks him to set Morton up for the DEADLY DOUBLE LEG DROP OF DOOM. Ladd adds a slam and then tags in Eaton. Eaton quickly loses Morton, who tags in Duggan. So you have a tease of a Morton-in-peril segment, dramatic foreshadowing for the crazed beatdown to come. Duggan and Eaton have some eachanges before Duggan KILLS Eaton with a clothesline from the corner. Eaton tags Condrey soon, but Dennis doesn't want to get in the ring. The Express take turns trying to pin Duggan, and then try at the same time, a fun spot, while Ladd is covering his ears on the apron. Ladd unenthusiastically tags in from Condrey. Ladd eats a huge backdrop and can't slam Duggan's head into the corner, even with Condrey's help. Ladd goes to the tights and punches Duggan in the gut with something; the crowd is livid. Two more punches to Duggan's throat. Dennis distracts the ref so Bobby can hit Duggan with the racquet. Duggan hulks up a little too soon and tags Gibson. More tags, and Dennis throws Morton over the top rope, and Eaton hits him in the head with a chair, and we're on. In the ring, Dennis bites the cut. Amazing quadruple teaming with Morton over the bottom rope, with the racket over his neck, Ladd's leg on top of him, Eaton holding his legs out, and Dennis kicking him in the gut. Morton is a bloody mess, and Ladd raises Morton's head off the mat so it rubs against the bottom rope. Ladd delivers another double leg drop and bites the cut. GOOD GOD, another double leg-drop. And this is my one quibble with the match; Morton should be dead now and should not be getting up at all, because Ladd's leg drops are just plain devastating. Condrey does some more biting after Eaton tages in and distracts the ref Dennis does a nice job tripping up Morton as he tries to make a tag. More biting from Condrey. Morton finally gets a hot tag but the ref misses it, leading to more triple teams before all six wrestlers are in the ring. Fans start throwing stuff. Cornette runs in with spray (ether in a can?), but Morton gets it and sprays Eaton in the face for the pin. Cornette runs in with ether-soaked rag and downs Morton, then kicks at him. Eaton works over Gibson with raquest, ref goes down, Condrey chokes Morton's motionsless obdy. Cornette gets in some vicious raquest strikes on Gibson and Duggan while they are held. Finally help arrives, and the heels run off. Magnum TA attends to the faces amid popcorn and other debris. And I am exhausted, sweaty, and bloody. Or at least feel like it. This is an awesome match.

15. Dick Murdoch v.. Ted DiBiase NO DQ, 12/31/85-EricR

S.L.L. did a pretty great job talking about what made their 12/27/85 match great, and I had both of them in my top 10. I had this one higher (maybe even #2 overall?), but I would be pretty hard-pressed to tell you NOW why I had one higher than the other. This one just felt a little tighter, a little stiffer, it had Murdoch constantly working Dibiase's neck to set up for the brainbuster (that Ted nicely reversed out of at the end), it had blood, it had Joel Watts putting over the technical merits of both of them while one of them is biting the other's head.....it had fucking EVERYthing.

In one of the Flair/Taylor threads, someone stated something ridiculous like "This match is HATE personified". That made no sense to me, especially when there are matches like THIS on the set. Loosely applied neverending headlocks.......or guys punching each other in the face and fistdropping each others' noses? THIS is HATE.

BUT, as all three of the Flair/Taylor series popped up in this here top 30, I guess it's more contentious than I would've guessed.

But THIS. This is great brawling. I love how much they throw behind everything, hit or miss. All the punches hit hard, but the misses are just as hard. Watch Murdoch drive his elbow completely straight into the mat on a missed elbowdrop, watch Dibiase go knuckle first HARD on a missed fistdrop. But the hits! My God! Murdoch punting Dibiase in the throat, Murdoch kicking the shit out of Dibiase's head while Teddy was getting in the ring, Murdoch braining Ted with chairshots, Dibiase knocking the wind out of Dick with a nasty powerslam. This was constant intensity, not a dull moment. There are likely many moments I'm forgetting.

But moments don't make a match, and thankfully we had Murdoch guiding this one. I love Dibiase, but this match was the Capt. Redneck show. He takes a nasty stiff brawl, and adds neat stuff and uses everything in the arena to craft a match. He integrates weapons really nicely (dumping Ted on the ring barricade, blasting him with chairshots, slamming Ted into a table), and almost most impressively, does the best job of everybody on the set of incorporating Tommy Gilbert into the match.

Tommy Gilbert got a lot of criticism for his reffing on this set, as most felt he was too hands-on and it got in the way of some matches. Some of those complaints were valid. Here, I think it made the match better, and it was all because of how expertly Murdoch played off him. In the beginning Dick is kinda smug and almost laughs off Gilbert, understanding that he's the ref and just doing his job, even though it's No DQ...and every single altercation between the two of them gets slightly escalated, until Murdoch is just shoving Tommy out of the way to continue tearing Dibiase apart. Murdoch works spots so well with Tommy that it makes every other worker on the set look like a doofus for LETTING Tommy get in the way of their matches. Dick just rightfully makes him a part of the match, and by working off Tommy this way it builds even more sympathy for Dibiase when Murdoch is shoving past him to stomp Ted some more.

This match was great, and I'm glad it ranked as high as it did.

16. Terry Taylor vs. Ric Flair 6/1/85-Tomk

Flair’s a guy who gets criticized a lot these days for being a formula worker. And so it’s interesting to me that the Flair v Taylor match that placed the highest in the voting is the most formulaic of these. Lesson is formula works.

The Houston match has the neat arm work and the subtlest of Flair heel work, and probably the best of the Taylor selling. OKC match has the really full on heel asshole Flair and the most violent leg work. Taylor comes off really tough in that match and of the three Flair v Taylor matches, maybe the one Taylor contribute the most to. This on the other hand may be the one he contributes the least to. As this really is Flair working the Flair match against an opponent who often seems lost and blown up.

For most of Midsouth I've preferred brawling Taylor to technical Taylor. But that has been with Taylor taking huge bumps and brawling back from below against monsters like Kamala. Against Flair I way prefer technical Taylor as Taylor isn't as good brawling from above. This is the match which positions Taylor most as guy from above.

They work it similar to the Flair v Reed No DQ match I wrote about earlier: Taylor controlling with front chancery into brawling exchange into fatigued near fall exchange. Butch Reed had a really nasty tight headlock. Taylor on the other hand has a rather loose headlock. Loose enough that at times it looks like you could squeeze an extra two heads in there (did Sweetser turn in a Mid-south ballot?). And the Taylor as brawler section has some nice full swinging chops from Taylor but again Taylor as brawler just isn't as good as Reed as brawler.

And we move into the fatigued near fall section. In the Reed match this was all about make or miss stuff. Here its all about both guys being so tired they fall into opponents stuff with Taylor getting several backslide nearfalls. Taylor appears to be legit blown up and really Flair has to constantly adjust to put himself into leg scissors, backslide himself put himself into small package etc. Flair selling fatigued guy getting caught in stuff from shoot fatigued guy and making it work is impressive. My favorite spot in this section is where Taylor goes for a big chop into a headlock and Flair catches him with a side suplex. Taylor really has nothing in his chops at this point in the match and his lack of wind actually makes this spot even cooler. It’s almost a Pirata Morgan v Brazo De Oro Tercera Caida in slow motion sell.

Taylor also does his signature insane over the top rope “fuck did he hit the rail” bump. But pretty much this is Flair by the numbers O’Connor roll reversal into tights for the finish. If you’ve seen lots of Flair this is less interesting than some of the other matchups, but possible that Flair at his most formulaic is the most rewarding.

18. Magnum T.A. vs. Ted DiBiase 7/6/84-SLL

I think the biggest discovery of this set might have been Magnum TA. I think we knew Reed was good, we just didn't know how good. Duggan was a guy who had a reputation for Mid-South greatness, it's just that a lot of people hadn't seen it. DiBiase, Murdoch, Roberts, Gilbert, Slater, and the Guerreros were all guys who had strong reputations already that got bolstered further by this set. Flair, Gordy, Williams, the R'n'Rs, the Midnights, and the Fans had strong reputations that didn't really need any bolstering from this set, although they got it. And certainly, there were other guys like JYD, Olympia, Roop, Hayes, Tatum, and even Bill Watts himself who had a poor reputation or no reputation at all that came out of this looking much better than they had going in, but of that bunch, none shone as brightly as Magnum. Magnum goes into this set with a reputation as a guy who had a good look and nothing else. Hired by Mid-Atlantic on the basis of that, he gets pushed to the moon, gets booked mostly in squash matches to cover up his otherwise glaring weaknesses, lucks into a classic "I quit" cage match with Tully Blanchard, and then plows his Corvette under a truck, sparing us from his inevitable NWA World Title run.

That's what I was told, anyway. The reality that this set presents us with is quite different the the established Magnum story, however. I had this match at #7, making it the highest ranked Magnum match on my ballot. This is in spite of the fact that Magnum - who we're told needed to be booked in short squashes to keep from sucking - spends most of this 15-minute match selling a DiBiase beatdown. Yes, DiBiase delivers a great beatdown, slamming him on the concrete and working over his back for the first half of the match before getting pissed at a hope spot and posting him, and then just focusing on beating the shit out of him like you want Ted DiBiase to do in his matches. But the fact remains that dominant-squash-monster-by-necessity Magnum TA is not only capable of playing the underdog fighting from behind, he's actually better at it, to the point that you wonder not only why you would think he would need to avoid this role in Mid-Atlantic, but why anyone would even choose to have him avoid this role. His strength is obviously as a fired-up babyface who sells a beatdown, bleeds a whole bunch, but sticks it out until he can find his opening and make his comeback with some well-placed punches (better than DiBiase's, which is saying something) and regain control so he can hit the belly-to-belly. That's your classic wrestling babyface formula, and Magnum does it about as well as anyone.

This match probably stands out in a lot of people's minds because of one of the top turnbuckles falling off near the end. Both guys work well with it. DiBiase grabs it and tries to use it as a weapon, but Magnum snatches it away and bonks DiBiase on the head instead. Then Magnum ends up running the bottom two ropes like he was Rey Mysterio, presumably because it was part of the planned finish, but I'd prefer to think he just did it to show everyone he could.

21. Dick Murdoch vs. Dr. Death 6/13/87-SLL

This is a #1 Contender's match for Big Bubba Rogers' UWF Title. Williams is going into this match with a broken arm, and if he strikes Murdoch with the cast, he will be disqualified.

Watching this set, it certainly becomes apparent how much of Paul Heyman's methods were jacked from Watts, and how much better Watts did them than Heyman. One of the newer additions to the big book of wrestling accomplishments that Heyman can allegedly take credit for is discovering that wrestlers can be treated as disposable commodities. Putting aside the question of whether or not Heyman really took this approach any more or less than any other American wrestling promoter ever, it does become apparent that after a couple of years, he was struggling to find and market wrestlers that were as interesting and entertaining the the ones he had previously disposed of. Contrast 1987 UWF. With less than a year of life left in it, and with JYD, Reed, Duggan, DiBiase, and a whole host of other former stars long gone, they could still have a great show with Steve Williams slotted as the top babyface, opposed by a returning Dick Murdoch and a surging Eddie Gilbert, and The Freebirds, Chris Adams, The Lightning Express, a rising Sting, and Terry Taylor in the one and perhaps only time in his career that he was actually kinda useful elsewhere on the card. This match is a great example of what Watts' promotion could still do even this close to the end.

Match is built around Murdoch going after Williams' injured arm and Williams trying to give Murdoch a taste of his own medicine by going after his arm. The work is based on Murdoch trying to push his obvious advantage as far as he can until Williams has no way to come back from it. The first half is all tactical escalation. Murdoch tries to strike Williams' arm, but Williams avoids, Murdoch stooges humorously, and Williams counter-attacks. Murdoch gains the advantage and starts stomping on the arm, but Williams comes back and wraps Murdoch's arm around the post, etc., etc. Turning point comes when Murdoch exploits the other big advantage he has over Williams - Eddie Gilbert in his corner - allowing him to hit Williams in the arm with a mic stand and the biggest honking ringbell I've ever seen. The only things Williams has to counter that are his superhuman willpower and a cast he's not allowed to use as a weapon, so it becomes a question of whether or not he can tough it out long enough for Murdoch to get worn out or to get an opportunity to hit him with the cast, the latter of which he ends up getting. This is one of those matches where you get to see that Dick Murdoch was really one of those wrestlers who seemed to be great at everything. Guy you often think of primarily as a badass, but also a great stooge in the first half of this match, and a great sneaky, veteran heel in the second half. Similarly, Doc is a guy you always think of as a straightforward asskicker, but he plays clever, skilled babyface really well in the first half of this match and gutsy underdog in the second, showing a bit more range than you usually think of him having. The result is a great match that serves as a fine look at what probably would have been the big UWF feud of '87 if they hadn't have gone under.

23. Magnum T.A. vs. Ted DiBiase (No DQ) OKC 5/27/84-SLL

This is the match where it becomes obvious that....

A. The whole "If Ted DiBiase was so great, why doesn't he have any great matches?" talking point was bullshit.
B. The conventional wisdom that Magnum TA was a muscular stiff who couldn't actually do anything in the ring was bullshit.

This and the rematch from the same day in Tulsa are wild brawls fought at a blistering pace. These two guys just blast each other with punches (and yes, I'll say it again, Magnum TA threw better punches than Ted freakin' DiBiase), toss each other about outside the ring, and otherwise punish each other in spectacular fashion. Magnum hits a hell of a gusher, which just gives Ted even more incentive to punch him in the dome, only occasionally taking time out to mock him or load up the dreaded black glove, before Magnum comes back with a dropkick that sends Ted careening over the top rope, and then manages to score the belly-to-belly to finish him off. Functionally the same as the Tulsa match but marred somewhat by the intrusive Jim Ross commentary that cuts out the crowd noise, this was still a crazy fight from beginning to end, and more than worthy of it's spot on the list.


24. Ric Flair vs. Butch Reed 8/10/85-Tomk

Weird.

I really don’t get this match doing as poorly as it did.

I think this was my highest ranked Flair match.

Your standard rube criticism of Flair is that he made all his opponents work the same match and everyone was forced to do powerslams even if that wasn’t part of their normal offense. Butch Reed is a guy with a great powerslam who builds his matches around powerslams and flying tackle spots. Reed really is the ideal power wrestler-brawler opponent for Flair. At the end of watching this set, I was left thinking that it was a real shame that Reed wasn’t able to tour this match outside of Mid-South. I wish Reed had gotten the opportunities that Luger got. Reed’s a guy with great looking dominant power offense. Guy with a really really nasty grinding headlock, neat powerslam variations, and bad ass shoulder tackles. He’s also a guy who sells a ton and is a bump freak. He’s an ideal opponent for Flair.

The formula for a long Flair match involves Flair getting dominated for most of the match. Normally you leave the match with the kayfabe message of Flair is weaker but wily, smartly willing to cheat to eak out a win (or at least to hold onto the belt). You walk away from this match going “Holy shit Flair is a tough motherfucker”.

I love the Flair trying to escape the tight headlock with a suplex spot. Instead of using suplex as something to throw out in front or end of match, Flair will sometimes use a suplex as an escape or transition (ie. opponent running at him and he catches with a desperation suplex). Rarely do you see that against a power wrestler like Reed, but he does it in a couple of the Reed matches and it makes it look even more bad ass. It’s a no DQ match so Flair can’t hold onto through DQ (throwing opponent over top rope, getting self thrown over top rope, posting etc). So you have both guys getting hurled over the top rope to floor multiple times and the match continuing.

Long Flair matches are stories of Flair surviving. Normally they are stories of Flair surviving by his smarts. This was one where he survived by sheer toughness.


26. The Fabulous Ones vs. Chavo & Hector Guerrero (Mexican Death Match) 1/24/86-Lee Benaka

This match is a clinic in spite and disdain by the Fabulous Ones. One of the revelations of the Watts set to me was the effectiveness of the Fabs as heels. Looking back on this match, one could argue that the Fabs didn’t even care about trying to win, they just wanted to seriously injure someone. Expectations are seriously raised here that this feud between the Guerreros and the Fabs would be settled once and for all. I mean, it’s a MEXICAN Death Match. The ref has to stay outside the ring, except to count falls. No DQ. This should indeed be a “feud-settler,” to quote one of the announcers. But it just raises this feud up to another hateful level in the end. So here’s 10 ways to be a great heel in wrestling:
1. Flip off the crowd and your opponents a few times.
2. Mockingly dance to your opponents’ entrance music, and then hold your nose as they approach the ring.
3. Grab the mic from the safety of the ring floor and shout, “I never heard of this kind of stupid Mexican match…you make all the Mexican rules you want, we’re gonna kick your butts.”
4. Gesture to your opponent and the crowd to kiss your butt.
5. Repeatedly bite your opponent’s head, and then repeatedly headbutt the cut on your opponent’s head.
6. During the 30-second rest period after you’ve pinned your opponent, instead of letting him rest, kick him in the head a few times.
7. Run your opponent’s head into a chair.
8. After you pin your opponent, lounge around on the mat next to your opponent and do goofy leg stretches.
9. Grab the mic and taunt your opponents as your partner beats one of them down.
10. Grab your opponent’s legs as he lays prone on the mat while your partner hits him about 20 times in the chest with a chair, and drives the chair into this throat several times.
Bonus heel technique: Just leave the ring after beating your bloody opponent repeatedly with a chair, and don’t return to the ring after you are counted out. Obviously, I’m glad this match squeaked into the top 30.

27. Ric Flair vs. Terry Taylor 5/3/85-SLL

Phil promised to send me The Necro Butcher vs. 2 Cold Scorpio if I reviewed this for him, so I couldn't really say no. Besides, I think I hated these matches the least of everyone who is actually reviewing them, so I'm probably their best bet in that regard. I think what it comes down to is that while the Flair/Taylor matches are largely your by-the-numbers Flair vs. Broomstick matches, that's still something I find really entertaining. Yes, I'd rather watch the matches Flair had on this set against Reed or Wahoo or Jake Roberts or DiBiase or even the more fired up Taylor of their 6/1/85 match, but Ric doing his thing against someone who is neither going to hold him back nor be held back by the formula is probably going to be a fun watch for me. So is the case here, and Flair even spices things up a little by going after Taylor's arm after spending every other day of the year attacking his opponents' legs. Taylor, for his part, throws some good punches, gets over with the crowd, and otherwise doesn't fuck anything up. Does that merit a top 30 spot for this match? Probably not, no. But Flair's formula exists because it works, and I think this match bears that out.

28. Dick Slater vs. Jake Roberts (No DQ, Dark Journey In A Cage) 2/28/86-PHIL

For a guy who is primarily known as a heel, and who looks like a serial rapist, Jake Roberts is such an awesome babyface. The timing of everything he does is great, First part of match is Jake working the arm and constantly pointing to Dark Journey in the cage, like bitch you are next. Slater takes over by posting Jake and wrapping his arm in the ropes and smacking it with a chair. Jake takes a pounding, but times his comebacks perfectly smacking Slater with a boot. Jake goes down kind of easily though as Slater pops him with a top rope elbow, which is weird, as you rarely see a heel win clean in a grudge match like this. The abrupt ending hurts this a bit, great match but I think I liked the match Jake won the belt in better.

29. The Fantastics vs. Chavo & Hector Guerrero 10/12/84-SLL

A lot of people seemed to come out of this set with a lower opinions of the Fantastics and a higher opinion of the Guerreros. My feelings on the tag teams on this set have already been documented elsewhere. I came out of this liking both teams just fine. Didn't like either as much as the Rock 'N' Roll Express, the Midnight Express, DiBiase and Williams, or Roberts and Barbarian, but that's hardly a knock. These were two great teams, and this was your classic tag match wrestled to near perfection. The early brawling before the ref steps in and manages to get some small semblance of order is great. From there you have your basic faces dominate the heels/heels isolate a face/face gets the tag and comeback formula, and they know how to do it well. This is your classic tag formula, but it's wrestled at a sprint pace. High energy and high-end offense circa 1984 abounds, and the finish, with Chavo hitting the tope de Cristo on Fulton's kidneys, was the perfect capper to it all. Bill Watts on commentary saying that the move "could even fell Andre the Giant", really got across the danger of the move, and by proxy, the danger of the match. I'm a guy who often complains about "M0VES~!" marks, but I'm not really anti-offense. I just think there's a right and wrong way to use it. This match shows you how it's done.


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SLL's All-Request Early Saturday Morning

Yeah, I didn't expect I would end up having things to do today, either. Sorry for the less than timely debut of SLL's All-Request Friday Night, wherein I review five matches as requested by YOU, the Segunda Caida reader. Next week's actually be up Friday night. Honest injun. If it's any consolation, at least this is only the second shittiest thing to happen in wrestling today. Now, onto the requests!

Kendall Windham & The Itallion Stallion vs. The Mod Squad (JCP, Summer 1987)
Requested by Victator


On the surface, this seems like an odd match to request, but when you dig a little deeper...it's still an odd match to request. Kendall is a guy I've liked more often than not, but still, this is a match with four guys who are pretty low on the pecking order in '87 Crockett. Then again, I've seen enough WWE Superstars to know that guys in that position can break out some great stuff when given the chance, and I went into this figuring I might see something like that. And well, I think I saw where it was supposed to happen, I'm just not convinced it actually did. This is a ten-minute time limit draw, and the idea as put forward on commentary by Tony Schiavone (who actually does a pretty solid job trying to get the match over...this match would've been great as a radio broadcast) is that these are four young guys who want to make a name for themselves, and the exposure they're getting on the Superstation means they'll be giving it their all to prove themselves to the fans and the top brass. But their all really isn't that much, and instead of coming off as guys ready to break through, they came off as guys who were still green or who had topped out at a low level. Match is laid out in a pretty traditional 80's US tag style: faces dominate the heels early, heels isolate one face and work him over, face fights back and gets the tag to the fresh man, house afire, breaking down in Center Stage. This isn't the worst version of that match I've ever seen. The Mod Squad are solid heel clubberers. Basher comes off of the apron and boots Stallion in the back after he had been thrown to the floor, which looked pretty cool, and I liked Spike's big overhand punches to Stallion's gut. They were fine in that part of the match. But it's hard not to think of the long list of teams that could've done it better. It's even harder not to think of the long list of teams that would've been more compelling than Windham and the Stallion, who were just deadly dull here. I mean, I don't mean to review the match I want to see instead of the match I am seeing, but formula's familiarity makes it hard not to think of all the times it's been done better. It's a great formula, but a formula doesn't do all the work for you. These guys didn't screw it up, but they definitely weren't afraid to coast on the formula, either.

Ricky Morton & Tommy Rich vs. The Midnight Express (NWA, 10/27/1990)
Requested by DylanWaco


Now this is how it's done. The Rock 'N' New Fabulous Ones high five each other at the top of the match, and then the MX and Cornette all high five each other, Stan Lane attempts (unsuccessfully) to high five referee Teddy Long, and then he and Bobby Eaton strut past each other to deliver a slick behind-the-back high five. The Midnight Express > you. Match proper starts with some basic exchanges between Eaton and Ricky Morton (who will wrestle practically the entire match for his team), before it starts breaking down when Eaton gets Morton in the corner and smacks him hard across the mouth. Irish whip into the opposite corner gets reversed, but Eaton tosses a mean back elbow when Morton charges in. Then we get a slick criss-cross sequence where Morton takes the upper hand and pulls out the circa 1990 hurricanrana, with Eaton tumbling into the face corner and taking a bionic elbow from Rich. The MX manage to control soon enough, though, and they are in full asskicker mode tonight. Lane gets a blind tag and catches Morton with essentially a really big snapmare off of a back body drop. This is also one of your better MX-era Lane performances, as signified by him following a superfluous springboard with the awesome clothesline takedown he did to George Takano nine years prior. Normally would complain about the superfluous springboard, but here, it felt like he was just doing it because he was an asshole, and it worked on that level. All of his redneck kung-fu stuff looked really good here as well. The MX double teaming is in full effect, including a drop toe hold followed by a nice Eaton elbow drop and a back body drop into what was basically a really big snapmare. But the real highlight here is Lane slamming Eaton on the entrance ramp, and then Eaton busting out the Rocket Launcher onto Morton on the ramp, which looked crazy as hell. Then Lane celebrates by cabbage patching in the ring. Seriously, he is like the dick of all dicks in this. It doesn't get the pin, though, so they wail on Morton some more, and Eaton hits the Alabama Jam, but asks the ref to count the knockout, which would probably look weird to some people, but the whole story of the match is that the MX are total jerks and that they are basically trying to kill Ricky Morton for the fun of it, so I can go along with that. But he makes it to his feet, and a whole lot of awesome punches get thrown before Morton blocks another Rocket Launcher with his knees and makes the rolling tag to Rich. He makes quick work of the Midnights, but Cornette and the racket come into play. It looks like it's curtains for or heroes, but then the Southern Boys hit the ring, both dressed as Jim Cornette, and Corny flips out, allowing Rich to grab the racket in the confusion and bop Stan Lane over the head with it for the win. I don't know where this ranks alongside the other classic R'n'Rs/MX encounters (and that is what this was, Rich was pretty much a non-entity here), but it was a great one, and not to be missed.

Mad Man Pondo vs. Super Ninja (UWF, 7/20/1991)
Requested by jaedmc


Damn, I did not realize how long Pondo has been at it. That's...that's a little sad, actually. Anyway, jaedmc requested this match because "not everything you watch should be good". Honestly, though, I didn't think this was a bad match. I mean, it wasn't good, and if nothing else, it's damn weird to see a professional wrestling match end with a guy shooting the half amateur-style and just keeping his opponent down for three. But Ninja - whoever he was - seemed pretty competent, and Pondo didn't really do anything outstandingly good or outstandingly bad. Aside from the finish, this match was unremarkable.

But who cares about the match when you have the commentary? We have Bruno Sammartino arbitrarily shitting on a Mad Man Pondo armdrag, a completely off his meds Captain Lou Albano, Vince Russo prototype Herb Abrams coming out to put himself over, and all three of them plus Craig DeGeorge struggling to call the nigh-unpronounceable name of "Pondo".

Tiger Jackson vs. Irish Leprechaun (WWC, 1980's)
Requested by Tim Evans


I woke up today to find that "Macho Man" Randy Savage, one of my personal favorite professional wrestlers of all time, was dead. Sadly, no one was on the ball enough to recommend a Savage match for me to review, but I can still honor his memory by reviewing a match featuring the Macho Midget himself, Tiger Jackson. It also features Irish Leprechaun (as opposed to Albanian Leprechaun?), who bears a more than striking resemblance to Hornswoggle, though I am told they are not the same person. I don't want to sound like a big racist or anything, but all these leprechauns look the same to me. Amusing comedy bit early on with Leprechaun trying to convince the ref that Jackson is pulling his beard, and Jackson eventually gets fed up and just does it. This is pretty lopsided in Jackson's favor, though Leprechaun gets to do a little bit of cool stuff on offense. Has a nasty headbutt, and he escapes a headscissors by standing up, pulling Jackson's legs off of him, and spinning him on his head like a top. But then Jackson gets the Leprechaun in a compromising position and...turns his feet around 180 degrees? And then the Leprechaun turns them back into place and scores the fluke win with a big splash! Eat that, Sid Vicious!

C.M. Punk vs. Chris Hero - 90 Minute Time Limit Best 2/3 Falls Match (IWA:M-S, 2/7/2003)
Requested by Wrestling_KO Mike

I've got a bit of multitasking to do as I write this, which means I probably shouldn't even be reviewing this match in the first place. But I've made dumber decisions than this and didn't back down from them, so this has no excuse. This match was pretty hyped back in the day because it's two indy darlings wrestling for 90 minutes. But it's also a match that's kinda been lost to time, and that few are interested in revisiting because...well, because it's two indy darlings wrestling for 90 minutes. Even at the time, I seem to recall the reception to this match being somewhat split. I, personally, liked it, but it's 2011, I'm kinda averse to indy darlings wrestling each other for 90 minutes, and it all begs the question, will I still like it? There's only one way to find out, and to make things easier on me, we're going to be doing this in five minute intervals, because passing judgment of all 90+ minutes of this in one go is just not going to happen, nor is me rewatching it immediately afterwords to make sure I got all the details right. Set the WABAC Machince for 2003, Sherman. We're going to Clarksville, Indiana....

C.M. Punk: "We might be here for a while."

Punk always carried himself like a star. We probably shouldn't be surprised that he became one. The opening minutes of the match see them take it to the mat, and the matwork is fine. I can't really complain about anything here so far. What I can say is that in 2003, I couldn't push a button and make a bajillion Negro Navarro matches instantly appear on my computer. If you were looking for quality matwork, your options were a little more limited then than they are now. If you were looking for quality matwork stateside, forget it. You had to wait three more years for Finlay to come out of retirement, or for the occasional Benoit/Regal match on Velocity. So this aspect of the match, while not bad by any stretch, probably isn't as big of a deal today as it was then.

Five minutes gone....

Next five minutes are pretty much the same story as the first. Can't complain, but can't say I'm blown away, either. But near the ten-minute mark, Hero had Punk in a seated hammerlock, and Punk turned his head back and nailed Hero with a short headbutt. Hero threw a nice one of his own in return, and now things are really starting to get interesting.

Ten minutes gone....

More headbutts from the hammerlock. Hero throws a hard chop, too. And then the pace starts to pick up a bit, as we get a few quick armdrag exchanges before Punk locks down Hero's arm. He does the move where he bars Hero's arm and then lifts him up vertically, which is pretty impressive looking on a guy as indy big as Hero.

Fifteen minutes gone....

If you're wondering how we could get fifteen minutes deep into this match when so little seems to be happening without me getting bored, I honestly don't have a definite answer. I think it might just be that they're milking everything they do for all it's worth. Whatever it is, it's surprisingly effective. This is the best five minutes of the match yet, as things go all Benoit/Regal with them still exchanging holds but also laying in some heinous chops and slaps and punches and headbutts while in the holds, including the requisite headbutt exchange while in a knucklelock. This is a blast. The minutes are just flying by.

Twenty minutes gone....

And we're back to simple, straightforward hold exchanges. Again, not bad, but after they kicked it into high gear the last five minutes, a little disappointing to see them dial it back in these. There is one really nice armdrag by Hero in this part, though.

Twenty-five minutes gone....

At least the hold exchanges are good. Hero works over Punk's arm really well, and then Punk turns it around with a rolling toehold. Hero escapes by almost Irish Leprechauning Punk's foot and turning it into an ankle lock.

Thirty-five minutes gone....

Yeah, I don't know where the other five minutes went, either, especially since the five minute intervals are being called out by Jim Fannin, and these last "five" didn't feel any longer than the five before it. The match takes another turn for the chippy here, as Hero attempts a German suplex, but Punk lands on his feet and stomps Hero's jaw in. That young Knockout Kid throws his first forearms of the night, as both guys start dropping bombs on one another.

Forty minutes gone....

Hero does a straightjacket choke cavernaria while biting Punk's nose.

Forty-five minutes gone....

Punk starts unloading on Hero. His urakens leave something to be desired, but otherwise it's pretty good. Then Hero comes back and uncorks the somewhat tubby man tornillo plancha, which ruled it.

Fifty minutes gone....

Fifty-three minutes in, and Punk finally scores the first fall of the match, and this is one of the more contentious parts of it. Punk goes for a shining wizard that was presumably supposed to take the fall, but overshoots it somewhat, and instead spins around and hits another kneelift to get the pin. On rewatch, the overshot isn't as bad as I remember. He doesn't hit it full on, but he gets enough of it that I don't think it really hurts the match that much. He fits two more full-on later in the match, they honestly don't look that much more devastating than the one he just grazed Hero with. What does hurt is that at this point in this match, this doesn't feel like something that merits a fall.

Fifty-five minutes gone....

It's around that both guys start to look a bit worn, and it's weird, because other than the simple fact that they've been wrestling a really damn long time, it doesn't feel like they've done a whole lot to each other. The entire first hour of this match is worked at a pretty even tempo. It has some highs and some lows, but it hasn't really built to anything. It made the first fall seem out of place, and it makes the current sense of desperation from both men seem somewhat unearned.

One hour gone....

Now they're earning it, as Hero takes over and gets some big nearfalls, including one off of the Hero's Welcome that had me briefly wondering if that was what tied up the match. Past the hour mark, they are developing a sense that Hero needs to score a fall soon, or he's going to fall too far behind Punk to overtake him.

Sixty-five minutes gone....

Punk breaks out the flying headscissors on the floor and an elbow suicida that lands him in the third row, but Hero comes back during a fight on the top rope and hits the Pepsi Plunge on Punk to take the second fall, and that genuinely did feel like a big moment, and a major dramatic turning point for the match.

Seventy minutes gone....

The finishing stretch begins in earnest, and what's interesting is that both guys are totally wiped out to the point that you buy the idea that any move could potentially win the match, even though you know without even looking at the results that this thing is going the full 90 minutes.

Seventy-five minutes gone....

I don't have anything really specific to say about this five minute block, so I guess this is as good a place to put this comment as any: this is a great match, but aside from the fact that the Punk/Hero feud was built around them having really long matches with each other, there is absolutely no reason the match needs to be this long. Not gonna knock the match for going this long, because this is the match I'm watching, and I'm reviewing the match I'm watching, not the one I want to watch. But 90 minutes is a long fucking time to spend watching a wrestling match, and there's nothing in this match that these guys couldn't have done in 30.

Eighty minutes gone....

Punk tenaciously works the sleeperhold, which seems like a really good idea in a match like this. Hero sells it really well, and then pays him back with a pair of backdrops and a snap Regalplex that knocked Punk even loopier than he already was.

Eighty-five minutes gone....

I've never run a marathon before, but I imagine that the end of one is kinda like the end of this match. It doesn't really matter what they're doing (though, for what it's worth, what they're doing is pretty good), it's just really cool and borderline miraculous that they even got to this point. And to a large extent, that was really the big appeal of this match - they could've done this in 30 or less and not lost anything, but they chose to do it in 90 just because they could, and that is pretty awesome. Hero hits a superbomb and crawls over to make the cover, draping one arm over Punk, but Punk does the same, and the ref counts the double pin as the time limit expires. But Ian Rotten comes out from the back and, in a rare moment of brevity, says fuck that shit and the match gets restarted.

Sudden death....

Both guys pull themselves to their feet, lay in some hard shots, and then Hero outmaneuvers Punk to lock in the Hangman's Clutch to finally put him away, and it feels like every bit as big of an accomplishment as they treat it as. I have seen many better matches than this, but it is still a great match, even with it's flaws, and on a meta level, what these guys pulled off here was unbelievable. I don't need to see anyone try to recreate it any time soon, but I'm glad it exists, and I'm glad that I've seen it.

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