Segunda Caida

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Wednesday, May 03, 2017

23 Things Berzerker Should Never Apologize For

58. Berzerker vs. Mr. Perfect - Superstars 12/14/92

In which Berzerker outbumps the guy whose most widely known skill is "athletic bumping". And this is really good, even with a long Ric Flair interruption in the middle of it. We start out with some classic Berzerker criss-cross rope running, ending when Perfect hits a gorgeous and stiff dropkick that sends Berzerker flying backwards at dangerous speeds over the top to the floor. Berzerker rolls back in and throws some elbows, rope runs some more, and ends up hitting a nice high kick on Perfect. Both guys try and outbump the other, with Perfect missing a fast charge in the corner, Berzerker taking a backdrop to the floor, Perfect getting dropkicked off the apron, all awesome stuff. Flair comes out to distract Perfect for awhile (the Rumble was in just a couple weeks and we were setting up some stuff) but Berzerker and Perfect were really great at continuing to scrap while Perfect also gets separated from Flair by the refs. There's chaos between Flair and Perfect, and Berzerker is flying all around it, working spots into the match while Flair and Perfect are arguing, running into a back elbow during the melee. After Flair is gone Berzerker gets a nice near fall off the world's strongest slam, but then makes the mistake of ducking for a backdrop and getting Perfect Plex'd. After the match, for good measure, Berzerker takes another giant bump to the floor off a Perfect lariat. This whole thing was awesome, and even played in the Flair interruption really nicely.

59. Berzerker vs. Virgil - WWF UK Fan Favorites 12/15/92

Very fun match, and I should reveal that I've also secretly been loving Virgil during this project, seeing a few of his matches while watching shows for their Berzerker matches. I already knew I liked WCW era Vincent/Curly Bill WAY more than anybody else (writing numerous glowing reviews of him and defending him on the internet even!), but for some reason it never crossed my mind that I would also like WWF Virgil more than anybody else...but I think I might. He's looked really good in some of this era stuff...Would a Complete & Accurate Virgil just be WAY too much of a stretch? Is the Berzerker C&A just perfectly on the button nose of our blog, to the point where it's both acknowledged as ludicrous, while also being beloved by our dear readers? But a Virgil C&A would just be "Aren't there some other unwritten parts of the wrestling universe you could be writing about isntead? Who the fuck are you people?" But I kind of want to do it...Thoughts?

Anyway, the match is fun. Both men are treated equal, so they both take it to the other. Virgil hit a stiff clothesline, Berzerker hits a stiff clothesline. Virgil had a clothesline-heavy moveset, which is pretty cool I think. Berzerker takes a big bump to the floor for him, and they also work a super fun sunset flip spot, with Berzerker desperately holding the ropes, and Berzerker breaks out his first ever camel clutch. Virgil had a good showing here, and after awhile Berzerker got sick of that good showing, and went for his sword. Virgil won by DQ. Once the referee saw a man swinging a sword in the ring, he was like FUCK IT. I don't care if no weapon was used, there's a fucking giant man swinging a sword and that has to be illegal as fuck just on principle. Ring the bell. Ring the goddamn bell. The second I see a sword we're done. We're done.

60. Berzerker vs. Bobby Perez - 1/4/93

I had no money riding on Bobby Perez, and for that, my pocketbook thanks me. Bobby clearly did not do the extensive tape room viewing, all of the advanced scouting, that I am doing. But I appreciate Perez's gumption in trying to sneak up on Berzerker while Berzerker was taking off his vest. OH SHIT, IMPORTANT: Berzerker has a giant white fur vest now. I forgot to make note of the vest when he first started wearing it, but I believe I first saw it during that SWS trios match. It's a big, majestic white fur vest. His now-long curls and impressive beard mingle with the wooly vest fabric. And while he is removing this vest, Perez wanted to start the match. And, so, Berzerker wheeled around and pump kicked Perez right in the chest. Those steps Perez took toward Berzerker's back were the last time Perez had the advantage this match. The kick to the chest was one of Berzerker's very best, ever. Perez had no chance. He eats a flying shoulderblock, Berzerker sinks the big kneedrop, big legdrop, wins with the falling slam, pinning Perez by simply kneeling on his chest. Today, Bobby Perez works at his brother-in-law's carpet installation company, probably.

61. Berzerker vs. Bob Backlund - WWF 1/8/93

Thank you, Philadelphian with a camcorder. The idea of lugging my family's circa 1993 camcorder to a pro wrestling show sounds like an awful chore. But somebody did that, and didn't bother to stop taping during an extended bearhug segment. This cameraperson would have been a fool to do so, as bearhug spots are the best. But it's great that this match got taped in the first place. Battery life on camcorders was LOW in 1993, and I'm positive this person brought a camera to tape Flair vs. Hart and Michaels vs. Jannetty. The Flair match is listed as a 27 minute match, and the Michaels match got 13+. But this kind soul used his battery to record a Berzerker match, against an opponent who he never faced on an actual officially recorded show. I would love if someone was taping this match, and then Jannetty/Michaels right after...and then ran out of battery during the Flair/Hart match. For two decades after, tape traders would be shitting all over this person for botching the recording on Flair/Hart - two guys who think their matches against each other are awful but in reality always matched up really well. "So we don't have a Bret/Flair match, but some dude taped 10 minutes of freaking Berzerker humping Bob Backlund??!" It would be mocked on tape lists. And I love it. I love that someone out there thought to experience the utter pain in the ass that was to secretly record a live wrestling match in 1993, and specifically chose this match. Who is this person? Would I know them, if I saw them on the street? Would we understand? Would our eyes meet, and would our hearts tangle with alliteration: Berzerker. Backlund. Big Boots. Bodyslams. Bearhugs. Besties. BAE. What are these feelings? Is this real?

Match itself was wonderful and worked entirely different from other Berzerker matches. It's a great fusion of Berzerker and Backlund. Berzerklund. What a missed tag team opportunity. We start with Berzerker stalking Backlund, and Backlund sweeping at Berzerker's legs with his hand (similar to what I've seen Kerry Von Erich do), and these sweeps allow Berzerker to do a banana peel bump and then his great splits bump. This was a really smart use of the splits bump, as Backlund was directly sweeping that one leg, and coming this early in the match was unique, but was a nice way of showing that Backlund could get to the Berzerker. And here's where the match can potentially lose some people, but I was hooked: we go into a long knucklelock/test of strength spot. It's long, but I thought it was always engaging. I'm always fascinated by Backlund's strength and I weirdly got into the battle. Unexpectedly, Backlund rolls back through it and spins into a wristlock. I love it. Backlund can't go toe to toe with this guy, but he finds his ways. We also get a long, engaging bearhug. I love bearhugs. Many people don't. This match isn't for those people. But this was an awesome bearhug, and Backlund was great at milking the pain. Great faces from Backlund and I loved the moments he would rear back to punch Berzerker, only to have the hold clamped on tighter. Finish was great in that it played into both men, with Berzerker throwing him into the ropes and lifting Backlund into a bearhug, but Backlund shifting his weight and falling onto Berzerker with a makeshift Thesz press for the (quick) pin. A fun, unique match in the Berzerker canon, filmed by a mystery.

COMPLETE & ACCURATE BERZERKER



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