AEW Five Fingers of Death 10/6 - 10/12

AEW Collision 10/11/25

LFI (RUSH/Sammy Guevara/Dralistico) vs. MXM TV (Johnny TV/Mason Madden/Mansoor)

MD: Hey, it's a multifunctional TV match. In and out in under 4 minutes, not counting the set up. That gave everything the sense of chaos you want out of a Rush match. Now that Caster's no longer doing the challenge (at least temporarily), this fills that spot on the card, gives fans the surprise of not knowing who will come out, lets Mansoor stooge big (here flipping onto his face and then trying foolishly to attack Rush), lets the challengers figure out how to deal with the problem of Mason Madden (catching him mid-pose with tandem kicks and then dodging him as he crotched himself) and work fairly even with Johnny to start. They fit in a huge spot with Dralistico crashing Johnny into the guardrail on his 'rana, a bit of sizzle with Taya hitting one off the apron herself, and then, just like last week with DCF, the big bomb train on Mansoor. Put LFI over strong to set up their trios titles challenge, entertained the crowd, filled a few minutes, and set things up by having Eddie's music interrupt them for the next match. Perfectly effective pro wrestling right here.

Eddie Kingston vs. Beast Mortos

MD: Another week, another match, another step to climb. You watch Eddie and you feel his pain. When he gets knocked down, that hurts, yeah, because of course it does. But it hurts him to get up too, to turn the body, to get his feet under him, to press up against the weight of the world and find his way back to his feet. It hurts. It doesn't hurt Speedball when he gets up. It doesn't hurt Kevin Knight. It hurts Eddie. Every single time. 

It's a contradiction lately. Every time it gets harder than the last. Yet every time it gets easier too. Because he's working his way back out of his hole, working his way back up to the light, working his way back to who he was when he won the Continental Classic and held three titles at once. 

But yeah, it hurts.

He was more of himself here. Two weeks ago, if he tried a shoulder block on Mortos, he'd crumble. Now he stood firm. He forced Mortos out of the ring, forced him to ask for a time out, forced him to push the dissonance hard. He's so big and so fierce and he had to rely on an eye poke. That hurt too but it probably felt good and right, because Eddie forced him into that spot. That was a victory right there, the only sort of victory Eddie knows, the kind where he ends up with a finger in his eye for his trouble.

Yeah, he went for the uraken right off the bat, because Mortos is a threat and because Eddie's not yet Eddie yet, not really, not all the way. But when that didn't work, he didn't stop, he didn't look down, he kept on pressing. And that meant that while Mortos got the better of him for a time, that he was able to fight back, able to get under him and hit an exploder, and able to hit a uraken that didn't feel like a fluke for once, that felt instead like like a more commanding, more dominant strike. 

So yeah, it hurts, it all hurts, it'll always hurt, but with each step, Eddie gets closer and closer to finding himself once more. 

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AEW Five Fingers of Death 4/14 - 4/20

AEW Dynamite 4/16/25

Athena vs Mercedes Mone

MD: There was a post that went viral a month or two ago where people were besmirching the good name of Manami Toyota because she didn't hit some of her stuff clean. I've some issues with Toyota structurally (because of course I do) but that's the last thing I'm going to criticize her on.

You want wrestling a little rough around the edges. You don't want everything to hit clean. You don't want things to look collaborative, even when you know they have to be. You want that grit, because with grit comes determination, and through determination, you get emotion that you can latch onto as a fan. Go back and watch Jumbo from the 70s, watch Fujinami from the 80s. Watch the sweat come down grimacing faces and veins all but popping out of necks. That draws you in, immerses you. It doesn't make for as good a gif but it makes for a far better match.

Almost nothing in this match looked like it hit clean but almost every single thing looked like it hit nonetheless, and it hit messy, and it hit dirty, and it hit after deep struggle, not just a struggle between the wrestlers and one another, but a struggle between the wrestlers and themselves as they worked to heft up their opponent. One might think that would pull people out of the match (feel "botchy"), but it did exactly the opposite. It drew them in all the more because it gave a viewer something to push off against, something real to underpin the fantastical world of pro wrestling, something worth believing in.

What, then, bridged the gap between two people struggling to hit moves and a match so gripping that it's still hanging on to me almost a week later? Some of it was the stakes. This was a big, first time match, champion vs champion, hot act vs hot act. The outcome was up in the air.

And that crowd wanted it so badly. The crowd reminded me of the crowd for Ospreay vs Danielson, a crowd that was reverent, almost too reverent, that was just happy to be there, that knew they were seeing something special. That it was in Boston meant that Mercedes wasn't even a de facto heel, and no one really got cheered or booed. It reminded me too much of that Ospreay vs Danielson crowd, where they weren't necessarily reacting to specific moments but instead just were glad to be there, glad for anything that happened. It's the sort of crowd that you can do anything for and that you can do nothing for. That Fletcher, Callis, the Death Riders were so over as heels later on (and Nick Wayne for the ROH taping) was such a testament to them and their performances both on that night and over time. So it was a special crowd, but that too was a double edged sword. I would have liked to see this somewhere other than Boston. I'd like to see it again somewhere other than Boston.

What really put it over the top for me though was the reactions of Mercedes and most especially of Athena. You watch her face throughout the match, watch her eyes, and you see someone reacting in the moment to everything that's happening, every success, every failure, every advantage, every mistake. Even if she might make the same sort of shocked face you'd get out of other wrestlers (let's say the Adam Coles of the world) on a two-count kickout, there's something that her eyes do a moment later as she shifts gears that almost no one else in wrestling is managing.

And here, it was contagious. I'm not sure I fully bought into the lock up that took them up the ramp and back but once things crashed out on the ring with the fight on the apron and the dive later, everything clicked for me, including Mercedes' own reaction. I haven't seen her this alive in years, and it lasted through the second battle on the apron, through the tombstone sequence, all the way to the finish. I don't know if this is the destination for All In or not. I don't know if Athena's just headed back to ROH where she can continue to anchor it. I'm not sure if she's made for live TV since she's so used to freedom and excess, but as an attraction, she makes everything (and I mean everything) more special around her whenever she's around. Even if there's maybe a potential cost to that, it's one worth paying now and again.

ROH TV 4/18/25

Dustin Rhodes/Ross Von Erich/Marshall Von Erich vs MxM Collection/Johnny TV

MD: There was a moment at right around the halfway point on this one where I was wondering exactly what they were going for. MxM and Johnny took out the champs on the way to the ring and Dustin was on the floor for almost the entirety of the match, but there was a modified shine here. Ross and Marshall fought off everything Mansoor and Johnny threw at them.

And then it hit me, I'm watching Von Erichs. That's exactly what Kerry and Kevin would have done in this situation, and it would have gone just like this for them right until Mason came in, because in this situation, Mason was Gordy and even if the Von Erichs could stand tall and fight off Buddy and Michael, they weren't going to be able to handle Gordy too. Von Erichs are a force of nature but then so's Mason Madden, and I'm not sure I've ever felt that quite so much as I did here.

Everything built to a great hot tag sequence where they made sure to nail Dustin again on the floor so it could go around and around a few times until he finally got in there. By holding back Dustin (as beloved a star in the hearts of the fans as AEW has) so long in these six-men, not only does it really give Ross and Marshall a chance to shine, but it also ramps up the pressure for Dustin to come in and hit his stuff.

This had lots of clever bits down the stretch including the set up for Shattered Dreams off a missed Mason shot and a claw-assisted triple nut shot that was sort of like a pro wrestling Rube Goldberg machine in the best way. There was a lot of wrestling to watch over the last few days but I'm glad I caught this one.

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LUCHA UNDERGROUND ~FINAL~ EPISODE: Ultima Lucha Cuatro - Part 2

ER: When I started Lucha Underground season 4 TWO YEARS AGO, who could have possibly predicted it would take two years to complete? It was that magical combination of near total disinterest in the product after seeing the show's quality decline each season to the next, with a stupid completionist attitude of "you've already written up the rest of the show, might as well finish this race". I loved the first and second season, found some bright spots in the third season, and have just not really enjoyed a lot of this final season. Replacing Dario with Antonio was a brutal decision, most storyline payoffs were weak or poorly constructed, and the roster wasn't anywhere close to as interesting as it was in the first couple seasons. But I like finishing projects, and this one was more of an attainable goal just because it was actually finite. And so, six years after the show began and just over two years after the show's finale aired, we come to the conclusion of Lucha Underground on Segunda Caida.

TL: LU is one of the weirdest entities in recent wrestling history: A pro wrestling outlet with genuine backing and a fresh take that became this supernova of a favorite within not only the wrestling community, but with actual, honest-to-God mainstream buzz. We're talking about a show that was featured at SXSW after its first season, for crying out loud! And then they predictably gave it all away, going away from what made it so appealing in the first place and making some questionable decisions both with personnel and booking that it could never really recover from. What was found out by the time Season 4 came around was that, just as a show can earn tons of goodwill basically overnight, it can lose it just as fast, if not faster. Talent predictably lost faith in the direction of the company when predatory contracts were handed out like a death sentence, and on top of that, outsiders brought in never really elevated the organically grown original roster member to the heights necessary to thrive. That may have been the most crucial aspect of the company: It was COMPLETELY organic and self-sustaining, and the pro wrestling trope of guys with name value on the outside looking in at the hot new show on the block trying to get involved because they're "veterans" essentially killed a lot of what made it work. So here we are, seeing how high the dead cat can bounce.

ER: I liked our opening Mundo/Taya segment. Mundo has good Meathead Han Solo energy, and Taya's braid shaking sell of the doll possessing her was hilarious. They seem like fun.


2/3 Falls: Dragon Azteca Jr. vs. Fenix

ER: This match was good enough, and they tried some big things, but I cannot get interested in the Melissa Santos/Fenix angle. She doesn't have the acting chops to pull it off, and it was far more interesting when they were just fawning over each other like they were in a 2000s Morrissey video. Her having to act through ring announcements is ruffff. The first two falls are a little dry, felt like they were holding back for the third fall, which makes sense. Rudo Fenix isn't really any different than Tecnico Fenix, other than occasionally glowering at Melissa, and a lot of his offense looks like it's focusing more on a soft landing, which makes some of their exchanges look tentative. The tercera gets changed to Falls Count Anywhere by Antonio, and we get some violent callbacks to the earlier falls, but they also don't make a ton of sense. Fenix hit a nice German in the ring on Azteca early in the match, and it's weird when he hits one on the floor that is sold basically the same as the one in the ring. Similarly, Azteca won the segunda with his big tornado DDT, yet when he does the same on the floor Fenix is up wandering into place seconds later. It's weird to do callback spots when you're only calling attention to the newer painful versions being somehow less effective. We get some nice big spots around a table that refuses to break (nice rana off the upper level seating, big Fenix senton off the top to the floor), before it finally gets pulverized by an Azteca cradle driver off the top. The big spots didn't really lead to any big pinfall moments though, and it all felt like it was just building up to be the background to Melissa's involvement, which leads to no justice or interesting storyline wrap. It does lead to Shaul Guerrero as our guest ring announcer for the final hour of the promotion's history, so that's a weird footnote.

TL: A bit too cooperative at the start for this one, and the rapid cuts on the strike exchanges make me beg for a wide shot to see how bad it looked in full. Azteca had a nice dive, and the Fenix Driver to finish the first fall was definitely nasty. Azteca's crispness on offense is always fun, shows out a bit in fall two with the absolutely wild swinging DDT to even it up. The restart to make the final fall Falls Count Anywhere was a bit on the nose, but at the same time, it'll give Fenix an excuse to do something mighty dumb. I liked the German basically out of nowhere on the floor, as suddenness in a stip match based on the ruleset always pops me. The swinging DDT on the floor was even more wild than the one that evened up the match, but I wish there was at least a pin opportunity off it. And then Fenix kicks out at two off the rana through the table, rendering that point moot, I guess. The Fenix Swanton to the floor where he basically wipes out on the table is some Great Sasuke shit, and then Fenix takes the Cassadora through the table for a near fall and I guess you have to actually kill him? And then one time through the table and another Fenix Driver finishes? So Azteca never really had a shot? Just a strange layout for the match, doesn't really give Azteca a rub as the Azteca/Melissa stuff made him look dumb, and then Antonio says, "Love makes you do strange things," which is the cherry on top of this. Shaul Guerrero is fine? This company mystifies to the very end.

The Mack vs. Mil Muertes

ER: This had the same kind of unhinged first season cartoon violence that made that season so damn enjoyable. Two heavyweights work a fast sprint that has hard punches and kicks, big dives, hard bumps, big nearfalls, and an axe getting swung at Mack's head. It is a death match, after all. This felt like the entire match was really made for absolute Temple Fan Enjoyment, as each section was worked the way the Temple seems to respond to. Muertes is my favorite brawler in the fed and I could watch him knock Mack in the head with those big right hands all day. Both guys hit crazy topes, and Muertes has an awesome one that knocks Mack backwards into the ringside casket. But I also really liked the big nearfalls section where both guys had titanic finishers spammed to death, like a sick Mack powerslam and an even sicker flatliner that Mack takes crooked on his head. The finish stretch is classic LU, with Mack hitting a few stunners and then breaking a damn brick over Mil's head, putting him down with one last big stunner. Great all action match that felt like them getting an opportunity to work the match I knew they could work together. They had a singles match earlier this season that was incredibly dumb, a Haunted House match that included a "serious" section where Muertes got out a knife. This showed they had much better ways of integrating weapons into a match that was actually interesting. I'm happy they got a second singles match on the books as it's a singles pairing I always wanted from LU. It took until the literal final episode to deliver, but we made it.

TL: The pre-match was cute, Shaul not finding her footing yet is a bit odd given she's only 30, only an AEW ring announcing credit to her name? I'm extremely happy this matchup is happening, as Mil and Mack were two of the bright spots in the promotion's history, and the casket to start has me stoked. Mack is nuts, hitting his fat guy tope con giro and braining himself on a DDT on the apron. And then things pick up from there and these are two guys that know how to turn it up a few notches. The weapons in the casket is an awesome touch, and then the Muertes tope sending both into the casket was gnarly. We have an axe and a sickle involved, so I guess someone's been watching Mr. Pogo matches. I mean, a couple of weeks ago, someone actually got shot during a wedding angle on IMPACT so an axe doesn't surprise me. An ICE PICK, goddamn. I just rewatched Basic Instinct a couple weeks ago and yeah, the ice pick shots led to grimacing. A spinning heel kick that looked nasty AND Mack saying "KUNTA KINTE 3000" before laying in a shot, Mack rules, man. Muertes also hits his nasty chokeslam, so I feel like I'm getting everything I wanted out of this match and then some. Mack getting to kick out of the Flatliner is a great sign of respect considering how protected that finish is, AND THEN MACK HITS HIM WITH A BRICK AND A THIRD STUNNER FOR THE WIN. Mack's run in LU was an absolute blast, and Muertes was without a doubt the most consistent person in the entire run; to see them go out with one last banger against each other is incredibly satisfying. Highly doubt anything will touch this for me the rest of the night.

PAS: This was good stuff, a classic Mil Muertes garbage brawl with blood, dumb bumps and stupid weapons. Nothing in this felt space alieny or spooky ghosts, just two big dudes escalating violently until the ending. The spin out of the chokeslam into a stunner was really cool, I wonder if Austin and the Undertaker ever did that spot? I liked the Icepick as Kevin Sullivan's spike and the blood looked really cool in Mack Afro's like red soul glow activator.  LU eventually killed me, and I stopped caring about any of this stuff, but this match is the kind of thing that initially drew me to the fed. 

Johnny Mundo vs. Matanza

ER: I am genuinely excited for this one. I don't think I'm being hyperbolic or nostalgic to say that this episode has captured a real Season 1 vibe so far, the obvious best season of the series run. Is this like how March 2001 WCW was actually feeling like things were changing for the better, just a few episodes before it was all over? The power glove thing is soooo stupid but also soooo perfectly Lucha Underground. Mundo has a super power glove and it gives us a sign of Matanza we've never seen before, because now Matanza actually fears something. So we get a fun mixture of invincible Matanza as he kicks out of an early Moonlight Drive and other Mundo attacks, and tosses him with a few hard landing suplexes. The Gift to the Gods looks great, and Matanza really chucks him off the top with an overhead belly to belly. They brawl up to the top of some Temple structures, and we get fun Mundo parkour leap into a far wall, but he still gets caught by Matanza and tossed into a different wall. We get a big stunt fall where Mundo gets tossed through a roof ("You can see the asbestos falling from the walls," says Striker, a poor thing to have on tape when it comes to future class action lawsuits) and we get the big LU moment of power glove Mundo emerging through a door in the wreckage. Scared Matanza is a fun sight and something we might as well get to see in the final episode, love how weird begging off Matanza felt. We still got a couple of Matanza last gasps and this never felt like Mundo was going to dominantly come back, and it still felt like a big deal when Mundo put the monster away.

TL: Matanza's entrance gear is absolutely outrageous, some shit that he should have worn every week. Big time Vader mastodon helmet vibes with it. And yeah, I'm with Eric, the Power Glove is one of the great kitschy pro wrestling gimmicks of our time, and Mundo has the range to do fun stuff with it. And that happens in the start where he shows it could actually take down Matanza, a great bit of psychology to start, and then Matanza catches him and starts absolutely mauling him with sick power moves, including an impressive vaulting belly-to-belly. Mundo had a nice little comeback, too, and then just an insane Super German Suplex from Matanza with Mundo vaulting off the top of the post for maximum height. If you're gonna have a bombfest and aren't going to crush each other like Mack and Muertes, at least go big and with style, you know? The parkour stuff was great, too, which is a rarity in a Mundo match for me, so these guys are doing a great job with this match style, something that has genuinely impressed me. It's wild that LU missed so much in Season 4 only to have a match that encapsulates everything about it in basically one match, and the Johnny rising from the dead to use the gauntlet's power to kick out of the Wrath of the Gods and BIG PUNCH his way to victory, just a boatload of entertaining pro wrestling bullshit. Eric and I have watched a ton of cheesy horror movies lately so all those tropes rang true here, and both guys played the roles to perfection. Wild that he'd give up the glove like that, though, better man than me.

ER: I disagree with Tim's statement that there are such a thing as "cheesy horror movies". 

Pentagon Dark vs. Marty The Moth Martinez

ER: The Moth has basically retired from wrestling post LU (he has had less than 10 matches since this one, and this one aired two years ago), and he goes out with an all time LU performance. This whole match is the Moth show. He hits a true gusher, no blood packets for the Moth, just that thick kind of blood that soaks your entire head and thins your hair. Marty throws himself around ringside with abandon, going through several sets of chairs and hard into the ringpost (which is when the blood starts flowing). LU is a fed where basically everyone (especially heels) was required to take sprawling bumps through ringside chairs, in the same way everyone in NOAH had to learn how to get thrown into a guardrail. Guys getting tossed into chairs is always something that lands with me, with so many moving parts that it always looks painful and chaotic. Now considering guys go through chairs at least once per LU episode, it's pretty awesome that Moth's chair bumps actually stood out as crazy. He hip tosses Pentagon through a table, rips at his mask, stabs him with a fork, eats what appears to be a piece of bacon, and gets Pentagon bleeding. The match needed more blood, so this is obviously a good thing. That's about all Moth got out of this, busting Pentagon open and eventually hitting him while stuck in a trashcan, because the bulk of this was Moth making Pentagon look like (Antonio Cueto voice) A GOD. Moth bumps around for Pentagon and makes Penta come off like the top guy, eats a flipping piledriver off the floor, flies out of the ring through a table, gets a barbed wire board bounced off his head, gets thrown through glass (!), and eats a sick package piledriver through a bunch of chairs. Pentagon was essentially working as Hogan during the last couple LU seasons, all catchphrases and relying on others to violently bump for him, but with enough charisma it is a tecnico formula that clearly works.

TL: Perhaps the most telling thing about LU is that Marty Martinez, who has essentially disappeared from pro wrestling since this finale, is in the main event of a show in the last episode of the series, and is in a match that really has little doubt going into it of who will win. Just an absolutely weird run for him, too, as the whole psychopath gimmick was so hit-and-miss outside the ring, only to see him overperform inside the ring, including with Fenix at Ultima Lucha Tres. But we know it's Penta Dark's night to end it on top, and the only thing to consider going in is if he'll actually go for it or hold off knowing that sweet Tony Khan money is coming. Marty is going for it early on, though, taking wild bumps and hitting an absolute gusher two minutes in, and if you're gonna go out, you might as well go out bleeding all over the place. Penta is bringing it, so I'm happy about that, at least. These two really do just go all out, chair shots, the garbage can shots, and then the bat shots to the garbage can Penta is stuck in, just really violent shit. I mean, Marty does lesser stuff like the table bump to the outside and then goes through the pane of glass full on, takes the Fear Factor through chairs...look, this is absolutely the Triple H at Royal Rumble 2000 performance from Marty, a very good way to go out, and Penta did enough here to make it worth watching. I don't think I liked it as much as Muertes/Mack, but I'm a big fan.

ER: Hilariously, a barely mobile Vampiro brings in his MASTER, who is actually honestly seriously called Hexagon Dark (because why would you follow a master who has one less side?) and Vampiro's master is the tiniest little man! I thought it was Darby Allin, but apparently it is Australian Suicide, who is the same size as AAA era Rey. They couldn't have found anyone with decent size? Bring back Ezekiel Jackson from the grave and put him under a Penta mask? I'm pretty sure the only guy in LU smaller than Hexagon would be Mascarita Sagrada, but I'd have to see them standing side by side to be certain. And then Jake Strong comes out and cashes in Gift of the Gods to be the final champion in LU history!! The whole episode felt designed to give the LU fans nothing but matches they wanted and finishes they wanted to see, and then the entire series ends with the fans bummed out and quiet about Jake Strong.

TL: The Australian Suicide Hexagon Dark master bullshit was hilarious to me, and leading to the obvious Strong cash-in bullshit was even more hilarious. Marty goes out like that knowing he's done, and then you get about as impactful a Strong cash-in as when he won his MITB cash-in. This means that LU absolutely was thinking a Season 5 was going to happen, when everything about the show said otherwise, and the postscripts, with Matanza getting his heart ripped out (?!?), Strong getting the glove, Taya being possessed by a damn doll, I think I would have loved to see Lucha Underground Season 5: Temple of the Gods. AND THE WADE BARRETT REVEAL. GODFREY IN THE LIMO. Why is Lucha Underground deciding to become interesting right when I lose interest? AND LITTLE CUETO IS BACK? Okay, I take back everything I said, bring it back, man.

ER: And we get a long, wistful series of vignettes, segments designed to set up the storylines for a season 5 that was assuredly never going to happen. Black Lotus murders Matanza with the gauntlet, Strong steals the gauntlet from series punching bag and perpetual loser Dragon Azteca Jr. (breaking his ankle just to remind him that he's a loser), Taya is possessed, and Wade Barrett is revealed as a higher power (in 2018 we would have had no clue how true a higher power he was, as taking Mauro Ranallo's voice off of television is a real god tier move). And to really hammer home the cruelty, we get one final glimpse of Dario being resurrected, and as much of a drag parts of this last season was, I would have obviously been back for season 5 and WARRING CUETOS!! But they went out with a very strong last episode, and that will leave a lot of goodwill for a promotion that I watched in its entirety.

TL: This is still pretty obviously the death knell for the promotion given most of the guys on top are with other promotions, namely AEW, but you have to give them credit for at least making it look like they had a plan going forward. Dueling Cuetos, leaning in completely to the Gods motif, I mean, gimme 22 episodes of that, please. Someone is going to want to watch this the entire way through years from now because it'll be readily available on something other than Tubi and be flabbergasted by what happened here: a promotion that got a ton of talent, most of them at exactly the right time, but only went forward with specific guys due to a number of factors that seem so incredibly dubious in retrospect, only to stumble sideways into greatness multiple weeks due to that multitude of talent. LU was odd until the very end, and perhaps the only thing that would be more odd and more fitting is if somehow they got everyone back together for Season 5, even with all odds stacked against them. We'll be ready when it happens.

COMPLETE, SOMEHOW, EPISODE GUIDE TO LUCHA UNDERGROUND

2018 MOTY MASTER LIST

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Lucha Underground Season 4 Episode 19: Savagery

TL: Gonna do a little something different while reviewing this: Watching the whole episode while my overly loud dishwasher is running in the background. When you live in a 450 sq. ft. granny unit, sometimes things like this are unavoidable, but also, I much prefer the constant whirr of the dishwasher to at least 95% of the dialogue on this show. And my point is immediately made by the opening segment featuring Cueto and Strong. Another time where AEW not letting Jake talk is a good thing; then again, seeing a known racist have to react positively to a perceived ancient piece of Mexican history is high comedy, as is his idea of manifest destiny with saying the phrase, "This isn't your temple. It's mine!" as he leaves. What a segment. Dishwasher, don't fail me now.


Aerostar vs. PJ Black vs. Hernandez vs. Big Bad Steve vs. King Cuerno vs. Jake Strong vs. Dante Fox

ER: Oh damn we get a battle royal in LU, AND the long overdue return of Big Bad Steve!? Okay Big Bad Steve got eliminated as I was typing that first sentence and I hate this now. This was a pretty bad battle royal. It goes only a few minutes, Steve and Hernandez get eliminated super early the exact same way, people keep showboating on the apron, Dante Fox returns after a year and gets a couple of slippery escapes, whatever. The show is named after Jake Strong, he mush mouthed his way through the opening video with Cueto, we knew who was winning, but that doesn't mean they had to go out and do a battle royal that took as much time as the entrances. Lame.

TL: BIG BAD STEVE BACK IN THE GODDAMN BUILDING. And I'm happy to see Dante back, too, as him going balls to the damn wall with Killshot was worth a return. It's a battle royal, which should make Eric happy. (Arrested Development Narrator: "It didn't.") He likes to do a yearly get together where we blind pick battle royals based on the participants. The last one we did, he chose the Slamboree '98 Cruiserweight Battle Royal to start and I ran away with the entire evening on points, blowing away the field. Can't believe he has me back for it, to be honest. In less than a minute, Big Bad Steve gets to show off why he's a goddamn base god for Aerostar and then throws a fantastic right hand only to get eliminated first. About right. This is obviously a vehicle to get Strong right into the main event. Sad that it has to come at the expense of guys like Fox, who showed out to such an amazing extent that him getting treated like an afterthought here is incredibly puzzling and incredibly sad. And then they make the battle royal pointless by just having a 7-way match for the belt next week. And it sets up a Mundo match later that night? Okay. I know I'm just getting over food poisoning but I still don't get what just happened. On the bright side, guaranteed more Big Bad Steve, baby!!! Dishwasher update: A low rumble, but still loud enough to drown out Striker. A good start.

Killshot vs. The Mack

ER: This was more angle than match, using a first time pairing that could have potentially been interesting, to instead set up an uninspiring Mil Muertes run in. The spear Muertes hits on Mack is arguably the weakest I've seen from him. The match didn't really have time to go anywhere interesting.

TL: This had a couple neat things going for it and then they ended it for the angle, which in itself seemed pointless, especially given how well Mack came off in browbeating Muertes before. This was very much in the vein of those old Attitude-era TV segments where a 2-3 minute match gets thrown away for an angle that didn't need to be expanded upon. Dishwasher update: A couple of louder whirrs every now and then, really digging in deep to get that good clean.

ER: I've gotten so into Sammy Guevara crushing it while playing the lowest man on the totem pole in The Inner Circle that it's now weird to see him as the plucky babyface joining XO and Ivelisse. The trios match should still be good.

TL: The Sammy reveal was fun as he's been one of the only people I've enjoyed since AEW has started up, but holy crap, the inside jokes about Famous B's 7-year contract for an LU talent write themselves. That's the only thing I enjoyed about this. This whole show has been just nothing but promos, really. Dishwasher update: Cleaner than Famous B after that trash can shot.

Jake Strong vs. Johnny Mundo

ER: This is that kind of 2011 pro wrestling vibe that I have absolutely no interest in revisiting, baby! There were some things I liked here, big individual moments, but I don't think it added up to a very good match. Mundo takes some big bumps, including this awful moment where he hit a kick from the apron and managed to fall on the buckles, apron, ring steps, and floor, winding up with his legs over his head. But seconds later he was totally fine. Mundo is such an athletic bumper that he often winds up making bumps absolutely meaningless in a Petey Williams kind of way. And this was certainly a match where no move mattered. Both guys took control at will, no matter what they had just taken. Strong took over after taking a sitout powerbomb on the floor, Mundo took back over after taking a big lariat to the back of the head, both guys just kept popping up whenever necessary. And by the time we get to ankle lock reversals I am praying for death's sweet release. Matanza runs out at the end, there's an obvious blood packet to really plant the flag in this shit sundae, and I am happy it's over.

TL: Johnny just got to walk out in front of 40k+ and work a minute in the Rumble for a big payday and you have to be happy for him to be able to go from a promotion on its last legs (and the husk of Impact!) to being an upper-midcarder for the world's biggest promotion at the drop of a hat. I kept waiting for something to jump out in this match given they know each other pretty well but nothing really made an impact for me outside of Johnny's nuts bumps to the outside. And then they start brawling into the crowd and the sweet, slow, rhythmic churn of my dishwasher soothes me as Morrison decides to turn a wrestling match into a literal parkour demonstration. There was no rhyme or reason to this match. A guy like Strong who has been put over like a world-beater didn't get to look like one here; 50/50 booking is such shit. If a guy is a world-beater, make him one. Have him show a weakness every now and then, but now he's just trading spots with a guy who, while presented as a top guy, is working this like any other match. Just mind boggling to me. It's amazing to me that I'm about to type this but here it is: The Nunchucks Match from earlier this season blows this match out of the water. Strong leaned into everything Mundo threw, so there's that, I guess. This is very much in the Adam Cole/Michael Elgin ROH Title mold and folks, that match style ain't it. It's wild they worked a 15 minute match that led to that ending considering how Strong has been booked but hey, what do I know? Matanza comes out, busts Johnny open, takes Taya on a tour of (Jake Strong's) temple, and then wails away on Mundo as if he was Ralphie finally giving Scott Farkus what for. And as the dishwasher starts to drain out the dirty water for the rinse cycle and steam starts to form, the sweet release of this show finally happens. 45 minutes of my life gone, never to be gotten back, but transcribed in all its hellish nature for you, the reader of this website.


ER: They went from the best episode of the season, to (I think) pretty easily the worst. The wrestling was not good, the angles were not interesting, and this whole thing felt like the ultimate wheel spinner of an episode. This was not the go home show to Ultima Lucha, but it made me much less interested in Ultima Lucha.

TL: Three. More. Episodes.

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Lucha Underground Season 4 Episode 9: A Match Made in Heaven

ER: This may be an odd question...but was that actually Melissa playing Mariposa in the opening segment with Cueto? Her voice sounded completely different from how I remember her sounding (not merely the absence of her minor speech impediment, her voice just sounded different), and the mask covers enough that I actually have no idea.

TL: Was that…a competent set up for the main event? Like, did they actually lay out the consequences in a cogent manner for us to understand? Wild, man.

Mala Suerte vs. Matanza

ER: So now we've established bunny hop "boings" and speed bags SFX to our LU SFX canon. This was short but nobody died. Suerte hit a great baseball slide dropkick to start, Matanza hit a nice headbutt to cut off bunny hops and hit the Wrath of the Gods. But again, nobody died, which seems important to point out now.

TL: I literally cannot add anything to what Eric said about this match when those SFX were involved. Peak pro wrestling production, that.

Joey Ryan/Jack Evans vs. XO Lishus/Ivelisse

ER: I really liked this, especially as a showcase for Evans and Lishus. I wasn't excited for Joey opposite another woman, but I liked the turn into Joey being a full blown sex addict, just wanting any kind of touch and contact with any human (at minimum, any human). I think him being into getting slammed into XO Lishus' juicy hot ass and liking it is an important thing to happen. Sex addict is far more interesting than overt pervert. Lishus is a ton of fun, a great take on an exotico. The splits legdrop is good, and I also realized with his outfit, butt stuff, splits...he's basically cosplaying as Naomi. That feels like a level of exotico we haven't had in wrestling, an actual drag routine paying tribute to a fan favorite. The cartwheel slap is great with the character, and there was a hilarious moment with he and Evans, where Lishus ducked a clothesline and landed in a crabwalk, Evans overran him with the miss, ran back, but was chased into the corner with a quick burst of crabwalking from Lishus. Evans played it great, the timing was down, a genuinely funny and unique moment played perfectly. They went way too heavy on SFX for Ivelisse, she had a couple weak shots that came off comical with the loud thigh slap sound, but stuff like armdrags and ranas looked fine and she ate Ryan's offense well. Evans is still finding his place without WU, and I hope he's featured more from here now that he's away from WU. But he and Lishus owned here.

TL: I want to be a part of the conversations Joey has had with other folks to try and figure out how he could evolve his character. As Eric said, the climb from pervert to sex addict seems like the natural next step for him and who better to bring it out of him than Lishus, who has the athleticism that makes it look like he can hang with Jack F’n Evans step for step. Evans’ athleticism never ceases to amaze me; his springboard moves look out of control but also look like they kill folks. Yeah, the Lishus/Evans stuff was terrific, which led to the absolutely disgusting finish with the omoplata that really looked like a chokeout as opposed to all the other loosely applied MMA finishes you’d see in wrestling today. Stoked to see this get a longer feud, too. Ryan and Ivelisse were definitely in this match.

Mariposa vs. Dragon Azteca Jr.

ER: This was so short and really a nothing match. It was presented as an obstacle for Azteca but he didn't have too much trouble with Mariposa. It's a Lucha Underground update on an old early 90s Wrestling Challenge squash match. In one of those matches the enhancement talent would maybe get a dropkick or a couple elbows that get no sold. In a Lucha Underground squash match the enhancement talent still gets to break out a Kudo Driver moments after taking a huge 450 splash. The times they are a changin'.

TL: Love the foul to start the match during the belt presentation, love the kick to the inside of the thigh even more. Also love how in 2018, a 450 splash and a fucking KUDO DRIVER get 2.9s, but crossing the legs on a rolling prawn hold? Can’t get out of that, no siree. But hey, I’ve never wrestled before, so I don’t understand psychology, I guess.

The Reptile Tribe vs. Worldwide Underground

ER: So Striker says that Vibora is "striking in his absence" meaning nobody else knows about Vibora's death, but you'd think his absence would be focused on a lot more if that was the case. Instead they're just immediately cool with lizard Jeremiah Crane being the replacement. Also, could we have maybe done a little better than Jeremiah Snake? Here are a few off the top of my head with similar vocal patterns: Jereboa Crane, Jereviper Crane, Jereconda Crane. They aren't rhymes, but the syntax is the same as his original name and they roll off the tongue similarly. Or, they could have embraced their ridiculous side and further have their cake and eat it too, and he could have been Janaconda Cobrane. Also, I like that even in a rare 4 on 4 match, Ricky Mandel still isn't good enough to make the cut. I want them do have a 10 man tag to see if he has a shot at getting some playing time.

And I really liked this match. It was the right amount of fun and action, and really the fed should run more 8 man tags. I've gotten tired of their go to singles match style, but throw any 8 people from the roster in a ring and they should all have enough material to work a fun 10 minute match. You get less reliance on kickouts and more reliance on saves at that point, and a well timed save is more exciting to me than a big kickout. We get a ton of big dives, some complicated (like Kobra Moon getting launched into everyone by Jeremiah) and a couple impressive Aerostar ones, and a huge cannonball into everyone by Jeremiah. The pacing was kept brisk, and the whole thing was kept light which is a good thing because serious matches typically feature Striker reading a bunch of lousy copy about the Fates of Worlds and the Calamity of Man. The post-match worked for me too, even though the Macho Man stuff was all really obvious, I loved the Pomp and Circumstance playing while Mundo had Taya up on his shoulder. Taya's reaction to the proposal was good and as I've been wondering the past couple weeks this surely throws WU into full babyface, which isn't a bad twist. I somehow didn't notice the relevance of the episode title, which now seems like it should be saved for the inevitable wedding episode of LU, and I also somehow foolishly never considered a wedding episode for LU. We're well over 100 episodes at this point, and if we actually want to pretend that this is an actual TV series and not wrestling, then we're already into syndication and we're overdue for a wedding and a baby. We've already gotten to the point of the show where it's consistently going downhill from its peak, so now we need a couple of classic ratings poppers!

TL: The graphic leading into this match looks like it was made for an ECW TV main event in 1997, which is terrific. Big wet fart for the return of Crane as part of the Reptile Tribe. Don’t care enough to even make fun of the name. Aerostar wearing the bandana over his mask is as goofy looking as Klay Thompson wearing the bandana during his 14 3-pointer game last week, which means I love it. Vibora had been getting better so I’m a bit sad he’s not a part of this, because this seems like the type of match where he’d really stand out.

More wild atomicos match than I would have thought with this set up, as I figured there would be more pairing off than a whole bunch of dives, but they wanted a frenetic pace from the start. PJ Black’s hot tag that began with a bunch of first week training offense after the springboard was amusing. Nothing like armdrags and shoulder blocks to fire things up. The more I hear “Jeremiah Snake” the more I cringe. He also gets a lot of the match here, which is disappointing. Would have loved to see more Moon and Drago, especially considering Aerostar was brought in specifically because of his past with Drago. Instead, Drago gets to watch Aerostar hit his second ridiculous dive of the match and then take the fall. Postmatch was actually cool for the fakeout, Johnny being magnanimous, and the two-bit Savage aping. It was ELIZABETH who did the “Ooooohh yeah” part, man. C’mon. I’m not sure what wedding day shenanigans will occur to hold it up before it actually happens, but I’ve been entertained by WU skits to the point where I’d at least enjoy it. Can’t remember too many happy RobRod movie marriages, but maybe they’ll make an exception here.

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Lucha Underground Season 4 Episode 6: Break the Machine

TL: Vampiro Fashion Update: Substitute teacher who heard you really liked Neil Degrasse-Tyson’s “Cosmos,” but also believes the world is flat.

Paul London vs. Dezmond X

ER: This was a good enough parkour thigh slap match, although I think it's odd they didn't do any kind of immediate follow up on London possibly killing Son of Havoc's best friend. I also thought it was silly to have London lose so easily to Xavier, even with Rabbit Tribe interfering. Savage LSD soaked murderers should get at least a little protection. London was really amusing in this, bumping around as fast as he ever has, none of his boy's interference working, missing hard leaping avalanches, leaning into jumping kicks from Xavier, always looking like he's struggling to keep up. Xavier was fine, but LU always has a few of him around, I would rather see more resurgent London.

TL: I was thinking about guys like Desmond X and a lot of it has to do with that his style is now the norm on the indies. Guys who are in that 150-200 pound range, have athleticism, maybe does one spot different than other guys of his ilk, but don’t have anything that stands out in a way that’s a cut above anyone like it. That seems really basic and obvious to some, but that’s kind of the issue I have: What’s the point of having that type of athleticism if everyone else has it? I’ve been hyping 205 Live all year long, and a lot of it has to do with the fact that the guys on that show have figured out how to co-exist in ways that don’t seem redundant to other folks on the show. Anyways, as I wrote this, we got to the finish where Desmond reverses a Dodon into a roll-up to win the medallion, but there wasn’t much that he did that made me feel like he made an impact. Also, how does London not come out with blood-stained clothes, man? Huge missed opportunity.

ER: The Papa Cueto stuff is suuuuuuuuuper garbage you guys. Any mic time from him is an automatic pass. BUT he gives us an impromptu battle royal with all the Gift of the Gods people, so I can't be all that grouchy. But the battle royal is only a couple minutes long and not much. Muertes press slammed Ivelisse onto Cuerno on the floor. All the eliminations came quick until we were left with Havoc and Mack, and Havoc eliminated himself with a tope con hilo, because he values friendship. That was pretty pointless, as there were many ways we could have gotten to the "somebody taken out of Gift of the Gods". Hopefully this puts Muertes into something more interesting than a scramble match.

TL: If Papa Cueto has been around for over 40 years like he said, you’d think he’d learn how to speak in a way that didn’t make me want to change the channel. Eric and I are calling a battle royal for the first time ever at PPW’s 4thanniversary show in November, and we are both as excited as you could expect considering Eric’s love for battle royals and my ability to win battle royal pools at his birthday parties, so anytime you get folks going over the top for anything, we’re gonna love it. The kitsch that Papa brings to the table was funny for maybe two shows or so, but seeing it every show for what will be like…what, 10 months’ worth of shows? Good lord. Like how Mil came off here: Got almost everyone out, and by doing so, was the odd man out because Mack didn’t think he could hang. Mil should be in the title picture anyways, so doing this match seemed a step below him, so I’m fine with this. Now let Mack win and strap him already!

Vibora vs. Johnny Mundo

ER: I went from not liking this, to kind of checking out on this, to enjoying it by the end. Vibora had a really great ring clearing run-in a couple weeks ago, looking the best he's looked on LU. Here he started off back to slow luchasaurus, working a plodding move for move match with Mundo that felt like it wasn't really going anywhere. Then Mundo hit an insane looking tumbleweed to the floor into Kobra Moon, crazy looking spot. That got my attention. But by this time more lizards were coming in and more Worldwide Underground were getting involved, it was feeling too Attitude Era, and Mundo overshot his twisting moonsault as he always does, and Vibora got an unexpected kickout. I don't know why I got more interested in the match then, but I did. It doesn't make sense to me, as I wasn't digging the match, so you'd think the match going longer would be bad news, but the kickout was well done and worked. Now, it was certainly weird that at this point the lizard clan were clearly the tecnicos, and seeing tecnico luchasaurus trying silly Burning Hammer variations, or take a reverse rana, or kick a chair out of Mundo's hand was fun, and Mundo's headkick parkour was working. I do wish Vibora showed some of the energy that he showed in his big moment a couple weeks ago, but he was definitely connecting with the crowd here. They won me over, wasn't expecting it.

TL: I’ve been all about Vibora’s extended offensive showing, so as long as he isn’t out here just doing the usual big guy offense, I’ll be into it. And sure enough, after Johnny’s good start, Vibora gains control and starts on offense and I’m digging it! Last season, Vibora was easily the most skippable guy probably in the entire fed, and now I’m out here digging what he brings to the table. Super strange, man. That Johnny dive was absolutely nutso, a no-look somersault plancha to his periphery. Really insane stuff, one of those spots to remind you Johnny is still amazingly athletic. The Worldwide Underground/Reptile Tribe stuff was okay, I guess, but I also was digging what happened leading up to it, so I didn’t feel like I needed to see it. Weird to have this type of chicanery-filled match when it isn’t the main event, too, but I have to hand it to them as they worked it rather well. Vibora got to show off his offense (He’s not a seven-footer, but that offense is nuts for a guy his size, still), and that finish was CHOICE. I’m a huge sucker for Akira Taue’s super nodowa, and here Johnny takes it off a damn springboard. I loved this showing from Vibora, what a damn turnaround for him.

ER: The XO Lishus Flashdance workout with Jack Evans spying his competition from around the corner clearly looked like something that Ted Cruz would have open in a tab, but Lishus really comes off like a potential star. The Ricky Mundo talking doll stuff is too try hard, but I liked his interaction with Evans.

TL: I don’t get why you feel the need to give someone a doll, but Jack Evans can make literally everything work, and XO’s got the stuff to really break out. I get this is a means to the end of Evans and Angelico rejoining, but still, too much goofiness here, even with Jack selling his ass off for Ricky's doll nonsense.

Cage vs. Pentagon Dark

ER: I wanted more out of this one, and that's always going to be the case in Pentagon matches now that he seemingly takes 75% of them. He's picked a lot of the worst offense to make up his repertoire, the slingblade and backcracker variations all need to disappear, and when he's up against someone with super cool offense like Cage it just doesn't play well. It feels like all the people I want to win this season are being used as cannon fodder for guys I don't like. The stuff around ringside was good, some rough falls on the temple steps and over the handrail, bumps into chairs and Cage thudding nicely when taking the slingblade. But in-ring it's mostly Pentagon, and not very interesting. The package piledriver was impressive, but this just isn't the horse I want to see backed.

TL: I can’t get over Pentagon, who is maybe 5’9” (listed at 5’11”, my ass), going basically eye to eye with Cage here. The mask tying part is really good stuff, but like Eric said, Penta getting so much offense seems a bit much considering who he’s up against. Cage has barely shown that even a guy lie Muertes can do much against him, but Penta going 50/50 with him, especially with how Cage is portrayed, seems too try hard. Never need to see a damn Canadian Destroyer again, but yeah, two of those and the Fear Factor seem about right to put Cage down, I guess? Super push for Penta is officially questionable now, especially when Cage gets to get his heat back afterwards, too. Penta already beat him clean in like seven minutes; what good does him being able to stop the arm breaking do? Should have stopped the pinfall from happening, man.


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Lucha Underground Season 4 Episode 4: Pain, Love and Sacrifice to the Gods

TL: Catrina trades in the dominatrix starter kit for the Jessica Rabbit dress sans sparkles thanks to a reverse Snow White? I mean, considering the magic threshold on this show, a wardrobe change seems like an odd way to show off your newly stolen lifeforce. Also, I’m sorry, but the dude’s LITERALLY NAMED FENIX. As in, HE RISES FROM THE DEAD. How are we not supposed to see him coming back from the dead after this? “Hey, Mark. We’re gonna call you Big Mac not because you’re super strong and your last name is McGwire, but because you’re a big fan of Burger King.” Zigging when they should zag, man.

Also, we get Striker saying Famous B might need a literal leg amputation due to what Jake Strong did to him two weeks ago, which is less believable than anything that happened with Catrina to open the show.

Big Bad Steve vs. Jake Strong

ER: Damn this was shaping up to be my favorite match of the new season, as it had the pacing of a cool big dude stiff fest (really looking forward to see what Google hits we get from "big dude stiff fest"), but then it kind of quickly flipped switch into full Jake Strong showcase squash. Strong and his flesh beard still come off a little mouth breath-y, but with Steve's bumping he came off pretty badass. Steve threw a couple of thee fucking best punches of 2018 in the middle of this, throwing one corker, and than a wrist bending shot right off Strong's forehead, staggering him. Strong had big shots to the gut, hard back elbows, stiff avalanche, wrestling tougher than I expected from his Impact run. After the match Strong hits a nasty powerbomb on the floor, Steve really getting planted. This was cool, really could have been awesome with a bit more time.

TL: Not gonna lie: Kinda want a shirt with the Big Bad Steve logo on it. The fact they actually made a logo for him is awesome considering a lot of folks in WWE can’t even get a damn shirt made. Steve has some great right hands as previously mentioned, as someone named Big Bad Steve should have, but they just look nasty as all hell, even with Strong’s stiff strikes going right back at him. Really shows how even the simplest of offense can make someone look good like that. We lost our boy Pindar due to beheading at the end of last season, so I’m definitely down to see Steve in his place as burly base with good looking offense. Strong squashes are necessity due to what they want him to be this season, but yeah, I wish this had more back and forth to it. Still, a good piece of business, as the kids say.

TL: As good as lucha masks and sweet suits are, lucha masks and cowboy hats are basically right there with them, and Cuerno makes it look good. Cage gets to flex and flex into a Muertes match next week and yeah, I am on board for that.

Daga/Kobra Moon vs. Johnny Mundo/Taya

ER: Really fun match, Mundo and Taya working full on babyface, and Taya looks to be having a blast with it, and it's kind of infectious. She really laid it in too, hitting some spirited back elbows and strikes, kicking Moon in the back of the head and hitting a sick curb stomp that bounced her forehead off the mat. Mundo hit his timing spots nicely, he and Taya actually come off tas the rare cool "shades of gray" characters, that can work either way one week to the next. Moon took a nice beating here, and Daga runs nicely into Mundo kicks. I liked this a lot more than I expected (just like Strong's performance, I must be in a real good mood, leaded instead of unleaded.

TL: I really want to like Daga because he’s got the athleticism and looks like a guy who can hang either as a tecnico or rudo, but he just doesn’t have charisma like you’d think. Taya was the standout here, doing a good lucha sequence with Daga and just bringing the stiffness with her strikes. That curbstomp was NASTY, as was PJ Black’s kick to set it up. Don’t know if I liked it as much as Eric, but it certainly didn’t suck.

ER: We're definitely into Leaded territory here because I dug that Vibora wrecking ball segment after the mixed tag. Vibora hitting goateed lizard cannonballs and big boots was apparently just what I needed.

TL: So Vibora goes off in the offseason and has some honest-to-god improved offense and looks like way better ring presence. Suffice to say, if this Vibora is the one we get this year, count me in.

Mr. Pectacular vs. Matanza

ER: I didn't feel like seeing Mr. Pectacular (although maybe in my good mood I'd like him in a gassed Power Plant trainee kind of way), and Matanza puts in a nice unlocked and unleashed squash. He hits a cool twisting back suplex after throwing Pecs into the corner, and then hits probably his greatest Wrath of the Gods, stopping, pivoting, feet leaving the mat to slam him the other way. A nice comeback for a person who murdered someone by ripping their face off a couple seasons ago.

TL: Pec just makes me miss Tino Sabbatelli (who, coincidentally has a pec injury right now), but he takes a great beating here. The Matanza body control points have been pointed out time and time again by us, but this was it at the top of its game. Everything had extra oomph to it, and sign me up for an unleashed Matanza, which was my favorite part of Season 2. This was a Mil Muertes-level squash here.

Chavo Guerrero Jr. vs. King Cuerno

ER: Wasn't expecting the comeback of Chavo, and it's good to see him still. a guy who should get more credit for what he's done. Chavo can still put on a good show, limps out a tweaked knee, hits a heavy crossbody, bumps hard over the top the floor, eats a chairshot, do some nice balance beam fight work around the raised barrier (which Cuerno hits a great high crossbody off of); Chavo is like the better version of David Sierra, and that's a good thing. We do get an unfortunately messy teeter totter spot, with Chavo setting up way close to the ropes, but Cuerno got through the spot well, and hit his bullet dive right after, which was convenient timing. I thought both came off well overall, but Cuerno came off stronger and that's more important.

TL: It’s funny that Eric waxes strong on Chavo to begin this after what I said about Muertes in our last review. Totally agree that he’s underrated in a way, and that he’s done a lot in a career that’s basically a quarter century long. I think I might be higher on Cuerno than other people, as I always liked his offense, and he shows off some personality here, too, playing to the crowd and helping build to the big spots, like the aforementioned bullet tope (preceded by an awesome top rope sunset flip). Guerrero shtick never really gets old, and Chavo knows how to do little things in matches that stick out. Enjoyable stuff and yeah, a good ending to a good top-to-bottom episode. The further we are away from the season premiere, the more this is turning into a show I enjoy watching again.

ER: My favorite episode of the season so far, We got manageable length matches with big dudes doing cool spots, just a really fun quick moving show. Felt exciting and action packed.


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Lucha Underground Season 4 Episode 1: El Jefe

ER: Yeah yeah, we're back. We're late because of me, but we're back. I am still doing this spoiler free, which is seeming like an exponentially stupid thing to do considering I've liked each season less than the one that preceded it. I'm hoping for a nice return to form this season. Saying that, I don't actually know who is still involved with the fed, which is part of the fun/horror of going into this thing blind.

TL: Hilariously, if we didn't avoid spoilers, we might cherry pick through things instead on here. There's a lot of horror in this one, though. A LOT of horror.

ER: I immediately regret falling behind at the very beginning of the season, since we get introduced to Papa Antonio Cueto, which I imagine caused quite the varied reactions. I both love it for its ridiculousness, and hate it for its everything else. This is clearly a show with some money behind it, surely we have some extra dough in the coffers for a better wig? Cueto's wig was a 0.8 on the Amanda Bynes Courtroom Appearance scale. The beardwork was okay. The voicework was sub-Christian Bale Batman growl voice. The framed photo was as good as any funeral portrait you've seen, but they lose major points for not having a Temple flower arrangement. Okay this was fucking awful.

TL: So, we get the saga of Dario, the feds, and the power glove, complete with Lorenzo Lamas’ removed eyeball and some dude in a Puma mask who may or may not look like someone who has a big match coming up at NXT: Takeover Brooklyn 4. But THEN we get Dario not only dying, but his father coming to his sparsely attended funeral.

AND IT’S THE SAME GUY THAT PLAYED DARIO WHO IS PLAYING HIS FATHER.

Imagine after the aborted Vince car bomb angle that got shelved because He Who Shall Not Be Named did That Which Shall Not Be Described, you get Vince coming back as the ghost of Vince Sr. haunting Raw on a regular basis. It would have been way better than the Twitter bot that played the Raw GM for months upon months. I understand LU is a pulp show on a pulp network and there is some goofiness going on, but this goes beyond the pale on the goofiness scale. Of course, Antonio berates his son, knocks down his memorial portrait in the ring because he finally has control of HIS promotion, and then announces Aztec Warfare for the LU title. That is definitely a way to start off the new season of this show.


Aztec Warfare 4!

ER: Okay, THIS was fucking awful. What a terrible, sluggish, boring, uninteresting match to start your 4th season off with a fart sound. This whole mess was designed to show the dominance of Pentagon, and for a lazy dude he turned in one of his absolutely laziest performances I've seen. Maybe because it was so long and one-note? It was bad. It started with him and Tommy Dreamer having a super slow mo kendo stick battle, and continued with him hitting his finisher on approximately 10 guys. The new entrants appear to be coming in every 30 seconds, and there's an elimination every 30-60 seconds. New guys come in, new guys take one move, new guys leave. It was fucking awful. Even Matt Striker wasn't trying, and brother they don't come more try hard than Matt Striker. In arguably the least inspired moment of a match filled with uninspired moments, Vinny Massaro comes out, gets a pepperoni pizza delivery, starts to eat a slice and in the flattest tone I've ever heard from him Striker weakly says "PizzaGate". That's it. That's the joke. The joke is that there is no joke. There's a reference, but no attempt at a joke. And the reference is already nearly 2 years past expiration. When Pentagon hooked Massaro's leg on the pin I expected him to flatly sputter out a Sandy Hook reference, but no. I rooted pretty hard for Chavo, just because he was infinitely more interesting in this match than Pentagon, and the crowd clearly hates him because he's...well, no LU fans were ever able to give any actual reason why they disliked Chavo. Striker points out how hot Catrina looks, and normally the golf with eyes bugging out and a tongue on the floor reaction from Striker is the lamest, but in an aggressively shitty match like this Catrina's hotness really was a genuine highlight. Fenix was easily the most interesting of the wrestlers involved, and it really wouldn't have taken much effort from him to earn that title. Awful, awful, boring, lazy match.

TL: I actually wrote out a play by play for this because I'm absolutely crazy and also thorough when it comes to pro wrestling things I feel like I have to watch. Good lord almighty was this a slog to get through. I mean absolutely terrible in most ways. The idea behind it was to absolutely make Pentagon The Guy in the promotion, but instead, it's like a Cliff's Notes version of the folks you might see on this program week to week, and it really doesn't do a good job of selling that here. Pentagon is in at 6, and it doesn't get actually entertaining until Fenix is in at 13, where he outshines his brother in like 1/25 the time. The biggest issue I had with this is that all the guys you'd be excited to see, especially someone like Muertes, are in the match for all of like...2 minutes? I mean, Chavo gets a producer's run? Marty gets a shot to try and score an upset on Pentagon as the final guy in the match? Especially after Marty lost to Fenix in the way he did last season? This isn't even a reset. It's like taking the neuralizer from Men In Black. And after this I need it. There isn't a single thing coming out of this that makes me excited for what's to come, and that's a terrible omen for a show that already blows so hot and cold.

ER: And we get more from Papa Cueto, which was a character that just could not have sounded good at any step of the writing process. I'm not as imaginative as I perhaps once was, but I cannot actually imagine a worse way to start a new season of LU. This honestly has to be the worst episode in the history of the series.

TL: Can we get Lorenzo Lamas back up in this thing again please? More Godfrey? Papa Cueto has worn out his welcome and it's only been one show. I started reviewing these with a Sexy Star match. This whole show was worse than that feeling.


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Lucha Underground Season 3 Episode 40: Ultima Lucha Tres Part 4

ER: FOR THE RECORD, we've had this written up for over a month, but Phil and I have been going content crazy with the NJ/AJ handhelds and the WM weekend shows, so I kept putting off posting this. But I made it to the finish line, bitchez!

TL: A 100% honestly accurate text message conversation that happened before the final taping of Ultima Lucha Tres:

Vampiro: hey, bro

Striker: Sup, Vamp?

Vampiro: was thinking we ball out for the finale ya know?

Striker: I totally agree. Biggest show of the year!

Vampiro: got this sick suit I was planning to wear on the first date with that singer from Slapbak

Striker: Nice!

Vampiro: but she shot me down so I gotta wear it anyways and was thinkin about wearin it for the final ep, brother

Striker: Sounds good!

Vampiro: what sick threads you got?

Striker: I’m going to wear an official Lucha Underground T-Shirt. Have to stay on brand and let people know what show they’re watching!

Vampiro: cool bro you do you

I mean, I’m not even on camera when I do commentary and because I’m out there in front of folks, I feel bad if I’m not wearing at least a shirt with buttons on it. Gonna petition the owners that Eric and I only wear official PPW apparel at shows now that professional broadcaster Matt Striker thinks it’s fine to wear a t-shirt on the biggest show of the year.


Cage Match: Matanza vs. Dragon Azteca Jr.

ER: Azteca never felt like a guy who was supposed to hang with Matanza, and this match bore that out. We get a fun twist with DA getting thrown right through a side of the cage, crashing through it to the floor and technically "escaping" just a few minutes into the match. Naturally Dario says we can't have shenanigans like that, though I liked the false finish. The real finish has the return of Black Lotus, and I'll level with you: I really couldn't explain her role up through season 2, but now that we haven't seen her on TV in what has to be well over a year, my interest level in her storyline is probably not going to go any higher. She hits a big crossbody off the top of the cage, which looks cool, but honestly who in the crowd was flipping out about a Black Lotus return? Leading up to this match DA lost to Dante Fox, Johnny Mundo, Pentagon, and Matanza. The last person he beat was Chavo. I am not sure how he earned this match, and it was worked like he did not earn it.

TL: I knew what the finish was before the match even started. When you have a matchup where Dragon Azteca, Jr. has absolutely NO CHANCE against a guy like Matanza, but you’re hoping that the face gets his win on the big show of the year, you let the guy with overpowering strength throw the dude through the cage to the floor. Matanza looks like a badass, Azteca “wins.” I did like that the build to the false finish came after Matanza threw Dragon Azteca up against the cage a bunch, which really made that throw come off even better than it would on its own, which is still a great spot. After the restart and Azteca ripping off Cueto’s shirt, you get Matanza slamming Azteca around outside before throwing him back him in as Vamp asks a question about anaconda’s feeding habits. Striker was silent for a good five seconds before he started talking again. Why the hell does MATANZA need help winning a damn cage match? Especially when Azteca hadn’t beaten anybody in months? Super weird match. Black Lotus’ return only to find out that Dario Cueto was a liar seems like the biggest waste of time in wrestling history. How did Lotus not watch any episodes of the show and see Cueto lied basically every week? What a revelation.

Jeremiah Crane vs. Cage vs. Mil Muertes

ER: My god the insanity! This match delivered beyond what I was hoping for, turning into an epic big boy X-Division spotfest, that also had tons of blood and crazy weapons usage. This would have been awesome without the weapons, just three big lugs working stiff and crashing into each other, but the weapons were crazy and the spots around them nuts. So you get Crane's great yakuza kicks, you get all three crashing to the floor like big Nitro cruisers (Crane with his great low-pe, Cage with a big flip dive, Muertes diving off the tope), Muertes slams Crane shoulders first on a chokeslam, Cage drops people with his awesome driver combos, all great stuff. Once Crane brings in a heavy trash can then all hell breaks loose. Everybody takes rough can shots, Crane starts gushing blood, Crane gets chokeslammed through a table on the floor, and back in the ring Cage keeps bouncing around like he's 100 lb. less, pulling off a big rana and a perfect Asai moonsault (and Muertes pulls off a flawless spinning headscissors on the floor, so these guys are all just the lightest heavyweights). Things get crazier and grosser when Crane slams a bunch of wooden stakes right into the top of Cage's head. I've never seen anything like that before. It's like two dozen chopsticks were just sticking stright out of Cage's head, with blood starting to leak out down the sides of his head. My god. He even takes a DDT to hammer the stakes DEEPER into his head. What the hell, you guy!? Muertes goes through a sheet of glass and comes up covered in blood, but they decide to go for ultimate crazy and we get Crane getting superplexed off the top THROUGH Muertes and a couple tables. Holy cow. The singles match portion (with Crane eliminated) between Muertes/Crane was a nice cooldown, with two big tiring dudes beating each other up. I dug their strike exchange, love that Muertes snap powerslam, and love Muertes getting the win to return to dominance. He really should be the top monster in the fed, but damn I really love Cage in LU. Awesome battle of the Kongs.

TL: This was wild stuff for sure, but I had to rewind and see when Crane took the shot to start bleeding and…it was off Muerte’s plancha? That’s…an interesting time to blade. I loved how Muertes always looked dominant even when Cage or Crane would find an advantage for a minute. Three big dives to the outside? Muertes takes them both out with his. Crane and Cage set up tables? Muertes chokeslams Crane through the first one. (He also threw out his awesome twisting variation earlier in the match.) Muertes doing the tilt-a-whirl headscissors on the outside was one of the great eye-opening moments that made you remember how ridiculously athletic Mesias is for a guy his size. Oh, and then in a match full of sick bumps, Muertes is totally fine bumping through a damn pane of glass. I love the build with the table spot, too. Cage moonsault? Nah. Crane crazy splash? Nah. Cage superplexes Crane through Muertes on the table on the outside? DEFINITELY. I also find it funny Cage felt he needed to do Weapon X to finish off Crane, but considering how this match has gone, why not be sure? Singles portion was fine and I liked the Crane came back out after he was eliminated to at least try and get some revenge on Muertes, but ain’t nobody bringing him down. AND THEY FINALLY DO THE THING WHERE THE GAUNTLET PUTS OUT THE LIGHTS!!!! And it leads to Cuerno’s return! Love the staredown where Cuerno has stolen the glove and shows it off only for Catrina to hold up her stone like it’s just as good. High comedy. Awesome stuff here. Cage was close to the best I’ve ever seen him.

TL: The Mundo video that Taya made came off as incredibly try-hard to be goofy and cool. The only good part was when they showed Dario in front of his “I’m Kind Of A Big Deal” nameplate.


Career vs. Title: Prince Puma vs. Johnny Mundo

ER: A long, epic, blown out ECW style bullshit-filled stips match, which is what a big Lucha Underground stips match should be, though sadly I enjoyed the bullshit portions a lot more than the one on one pairing, and the bullshit peaked in the middle of the match. I loved the Worldwide Underground coming out to interfere. Jack Evans is a great kind of stooge: impossibly athletic, and able to convey grace and clumsiness. It's awesome to see him interfere with a million spin springboard kick, but also flee and run into a cameraman. Angelico makes his big return and gets revenge, Ricky Mundo triumphantly tries to save everyone and immediately eats a kick, referee Rick Knox hits a sloppy as hell flip dive on them, Taya is dressed in a cut up neon shirt and jean shorts like she just got dressed to leave the set of a bikini carwash movie, and it all leads to an awesome kick out where Puma hits the double knees and a springboard 450. Great near fall. But I thought everything after that part of the match was a bit too flimsy and anticlimactic, with Mundo overshooting some spots, and a big punch exchange that didn't look great. Puma winning was a nice moment, but then we cut away to a close up on Vampiro trying to do a cool satisfied evil look, but it reads like him standing there looking like the dumbest possible version of Krang's android body. And then we end up getting...

TL: The match did the usual indy standoff that I’ve not even remotely enjoyed one bit in LU but when it spilled to the outside, it picked up mightily. The spot where Puma missed a dive from the crowd railing to the apron and then hit a double springboard shooting star plancha to the outside in basically one motion is one of the best feats of athleticism I’ve seen in LU. Puma actually gets a lot more offense here than I thought considering when Mundo is in control, it’s normally compelling stuff. Instead, this gets worked more as a sprint and a bomb-throwing match. Then the bullshit happens. I liked that Puma’s go-to kick to the nuts gets blocked, that’s decent storytelling considering it’s how he got around stuff in the past. It gets crazy after that with Angelico’s return as he helps clear out the rubble and we get Rick Knox getting his tope con barely over the top giro. Then…they go to commercial. Amazing production. So now two of the worst punchers in LU start trading shots and we get a couple near falls back and forth while Striker points out Vampiro’s obvious turn that has been foreshadowed all year. Puma wins with a 630 after kicking out of everything Mundo had. Vampiro grins like he just let one rip and doesn’t care who knows it. He’s as proud of that fart as anything he’s ever done.

Career/Title vs. Career: Prince Puma vs. Pentagon Dark

ER: Dario just can't have Puma winning a title here, so we get his career put on the line again. And this match didn't really work for me, but I've also been "out" on Pentagon for awhile now. We get our ample assortment of their one loud shotgun handclap sound FX on kicks. We got those in the triple threat match, but a lot of those shots looked like they landed heavy. Here you can tell the shots weren't landing as the sound effect SLAPS kept happening, but there's little crowd reaction. The crowd is the true indicator on a big shot landing. We get our flipping piledrivers, and package piledrivers, and I really dislike Vampiro as an onscreen character at this point. That stupid master story has gone on far too long, and it's idiotic to just have him sitting out there like a doof providing bad commentary, but also apparently being super evil and sinister. None of it works. And I don't actually understand the fans' obsession with Pentagon.

TL: I actually thought it was interesting that the arm break spot came early because of the stipulation, but it made the match clunky and even in spots where the arm shouldn’t have been used at all, it got used in ways that made it look hokey as opposed to brave for trying to fight through it. Amazing that even in what’s obviously his coronation, Pentagon looked like he was half-assing it. At the time, it was somewhat obvious Puma was heading off to greener (yellower?) pastures, but I think they did him a disservice by making him go out like this. Booking him to lose like this because you felt Vampiro needed to be a part of a main event storyline again was better than a guy like Puma going out on his sword. Got it. After Vampiro pulls Penta out of the way of the 630, Striker offers a little kid to come over and do commentary instead of Vamp and I wish the kid took him up on the offer. Penta Driver. Fear Factor. New champ. Sure. Fine. Stoked to watch Ricochet in NXT with proper booking behind him. Penta promises to rule over LU with balls and zero fear, and I agree that it takes a lot of balls and zero fear to put on these types of performances when you’re getting such a strong push.

ER: We get a lot of different storylines advanced in the final couple minute montage, like the lizard people actively choosing to be a far worse team by having Daga decapitate Pindar, the best member of the group. I'm glad Cuerno's back. The heavier guys have been my favorite parts of LU and this season could have only been better with him around. Oh and Godfrey shoots Dario. That's pretty big.

TL: Killing off Pindar is inexcusable. I have to imagine they figure out a way for Cueto to come back even from this: The show would be so much worse off without him as an authority figure, which is amazing sentence to say about a professional wrestling television show when WWE has four authority figures they can’t book well at all. Stoked on Cuerno’s return, stoked on more Rey and Matanza, stoked on Fenix and Melissa riding off into the sunset. But man, VAMPIRO has a master now? Get over it. Nobody cares.

TL: We will most likely be back with weekly’s come this summer when Season 4 starts airing. Considering this season was close to not happening, will be interesting to see how it’s done.

ER: Yeah, it's televised wrestling that still has guys I like. I see no reason to stop now. It's content, baby!

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Lucha Underground Season 3 Episode 35: Cien

ER: I cannot believe there has been 100 episodes of this show, and I really can't believe that I have officially written about 100 episodes of this show. My goodness that is a lot of words written about Lucha Underground, with 3 different people. Props to Tim for crossing this threshold with me.

TL: Happy to have been here for the handful I’ve done. Always loved the work Eric, Phil, Matt, and all the other contributors have done on the site. I am definitely stunned that this show made it to 100 episodes in a way. Makes me wonder how many other feds could do 100 episodes of wrestling with such huge variations of quality. Hell, CWF Mid-Atlantic is blowing this out of the water on a regular basis and they’re about to do episode 150.

Sexy Star/Fenix/Cage/Prince Puma vs. Taya/PJ Black/Johnny Mundo/Marty "The Moth" Martinez

ER: This match had a comical amount of "I make your partner do a move to you" goofy mousetrap offense, but I liked it. It was just a 6 minute atomicos match but had a lot to like with all the goofiness happening. I liked all the moments where Mundo uses Taya as operation human shield, like rushing to tag her in when Cage gets into the match, or blatantly throwing her right into a big Cage lariat so that he is in a better position to attack Cage. The double teams were all goofy but they fit well into the match just because they were pulled off seamlessly, with both Puma pulling out some ridiculous combos, a crazy spinkick out of something that started like an armdrag, a big springboard kick, plenty of fun bits. We get a couple good DDTs, both Moth and Puma really took them on the side of their heads, really outside of Moth having to bump around for Sexy Star this was plenty fun. Also looking forward to Crane/Cage if it ends up happening as more than just a backstage beatdown.

TL: So, this is some really basic quibbling with wrestling booking. Okay. You have Fenix in a blood feud with Marty that is building to an apuestas match. Marty starts off the match with Sexy Star. He shows ass and basically has to tumble to his corner for a tag because he can’t handle Sexy Star. So this means, with Fenix going to a standstill with PJ Black in the next section of this match…that Sexy is being booked stronger than all three of them? Really? I just wanted to expand on Eric’s point about Marty bumping around for her because it’s just one of those things that seems really out of place with all the stories they’re trying to tell in this match. When everyone pairs off into the feuds they’re in at the end, it’s really fun, and I dug Puma doing a gainer off Mundo’s springboard kick. Looked really sick. A good little match, if not something that felt rushed.

TL: I’m such a huge fan of the corny-ass backstage segments that LU has. It’s really amazing that they even exist in a universe where Being the Elite is also a thing. I’ll take this overacting over tongue-in-cheek inside references at wrestlers being better than “The establishment” any day of the week. Also, if it becomes a three-way between Muertes/Cage/Crane, I’m in. Just don’t give Crane a bat.

Dragon Azteca Jr. vs. Pentagon Dark

ER: They're keeping the matches to 6-7 minutes this episode, which keeps things fast and avoids bloat. You know you're likely not getting a great match, but you don't get guys working themselves into corners either. I thought this was really fun, even though I'm bearish on Pentagon he's still a really nice base for Azteca, and I loved all of Azteca's crazy height and balance he would display, every time Pentagon would toss him into the air. Him landing on his feet on the top was super impressive, and I loved him getting tossed up onto the stage and running back and immediately hitting a beautiful rana to the floor. Azteca hit a big skytwister press to the floor not long before that, and back in they did some nicely done sexy dance fighting. Pentagon would cut off Azteca when he got too cute (like making him pay for a handspring attempt by hitting a double stomp), and the package piledriver was nicely planted. Azteca gets launched a few times postmatch by Matanza, a sure curse when an employer knows how great you take big throw offense. This episode is nice and brisk.

TL: One of my favorite things in lucha when I first started watching it was Hector Garza’s tornillo. It was so amazingly graceful and also looked like it completely wiped you out when it landed. Azteca hits a great one here, mainly aided by the camera angle, but it also gave me a reason to talk about one of my favorite moves. This is better than most Pentagon matches this season because Azteca’s offense is good and Penta knows how to take it, and Penta can be a good transition guy. Azteca landing on top in an ode to early Rey stuff was awesome, as was Penta hitting the Fear Factor to finish off it. Matanza tossing around people never gets old.

Matanza vs. Rey Mysterio

ER: Good match, as you'd expect. Rey sticks and moves until Matanza sticks him, and then we get a nice long Matanza beatdown, slamming the back of Rey's head into various surfaces, clawing at his eyes, cutting him off with a nice straight leg big boot, Rey tries to tangle him in the ropes and Matanza keeps beating on him with Vader-like full arm blows. The Code Red was a nice comeback and then we go a classic Rey run, big springboard senton and legdrop, big DDT, Matanza gets a chair kicked into his face in nasty fashion a couple times (I wonder how hard front of his mask really is? It doesn't seem pliable but I'm not sure it's protective), and I love Matanza finally just taking Rey out at the knees with the chair. End run was big with a couple large Matanza throws, a nice missed charge into the post, but Rey moonsaulting into the Wrath of the Gods. This match didn't necessarily seem like a huge deal, which is a shame since you had without a doubt the biggest wrestling star in the company versus a murderer who has never been beaten in a straight match, but in a vacuum the two of them matched up predictably well.

TL: Rey’s barrage to start this was fantastic and really made the match have a sense of urgency that can sometimes be missing in LU. Of course, Matanza is a great base for Rey’s offense, including snapping over on a springboard rana with a tight window. The baseball slide Rey bump is one of my favorite lucha bumps ever, right up there with the Estrada bump. Matanza just slamming Rey into whatever he finds appealing is great stuff, just overpowering him in every way possible. The Code Red off the top was nasty as all hell and a great way to get Rey back into it. Why does Matanza need a chair, though???? As Eric said, he’s literally killed a guy. Like he needs a damn chair. The rotating German Suplex is still an awe-inspiring spot even though I’ve seen it done so many times. Cool finish and I liked that Cueto made sure Matanza won. I do think it was treated like a big deal, but it didn’t get the pageantry that you expect from a monumental episode since it was rushed into from the previous match. It was definitely worked like a big match, and I liked the postmatch beatdown with the chair more than the chair stuff during the match due to there being more intent there, but I’ll like anything these two do together, really.

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Lucha Underground Season 3 Episode 32: The Cueto Cup

Mask vs. Mask: Veneno vs. Sexy Star

ER: Is this an unannounced MASK MATCH!? I honestly don't remember. I guess it's possible they announced it, but it seems crazy to start off a random episode (an episode where it's not even the main focus! The episode is about the Cueto Cup!!) with a freaking mask match. Oops and it's Cortez Castro. It's Cortez Castro everybody. This mask was mercifully short and we're all thankful for it. Can't these two shitty cops just kill each other in an ineffective standoff?

TL: It was announced, but it was a Joey Ryan skit, so I can understand Eric forgetting it. Might be the best Sexy Star match in LU history because it lasted 45 seconds and barely had her involved in it at all. I’m trying to think of the worst cop standoffs in movie/TV history but I’m drawing a blank. This is way up there, though.

TL: Okay, so Johnny’s manager/agent/stooge, whose name I’ve already forgotten, tries a power play on a guy with multiple homicides under his watch. Smart move. Johnny threatens to take the belt elsewhere, which obviously means down the interstate to Reseda. To be frank, there have been worse title defenses there considering Elgin’s been a champ there. And Adam Cole.

Prince Puma vs. Pentagon Dark

ER: The stock has dropped pretty big for both of these guys, for me at least, so I had low expectations. The whole Cueto Cup tourney has been mostly disappointing filler programming (we need to pad out some episodes of a longer season...let's do a huge tournament!!) with a couple standouts, but a finals is a finals and there should be excitement over them. And if anything, this was a match that was totally made by the crowd. The crowd was in love every step of the way, even when things got completely stupid. If you watched this on mute, you would miss out on the unironic love that the Believers have for these two. The match itself was a lot of things that I don't like about modern wrestling, peaking with a dueling Mexican Destroyer spot. I thought Pentagon looked bad through half of this; it was very noticeable at the beginning how they were trying to hide his poor looking offense by switching off to gimmick camera angles, and later he would do annoying little things like charge into Puma's boot in the corner...and come about a foot shy of boot. But again, the crowd loves these two and this felt like the right match for the setting. I liked a couple of the little moments, like Puma rolling through with a nice armdrag after Pentagon went for his driver, and the camera angle to catch the winning 630, Puma's northern lights rolled through to a deadlift vertical suplex looked insane, and outside of that silly dueling destroyer moment we didn't get any overkill. "Right match for the audience" may sound condescending, but that's not my intention. It wasn't my bag, but it felt right in the moment.

TL: First thing I notice here is that Pentagon Dark, who has this presence that plays bigger than he actually is, is SHORTER than Puma, who’s listed at 5’10”. I know wrestlers are generally shorter these days, but I got a kick out of it. It’s billed as a match that was three years in the making (which is true) and yeah, the crowd is definitely into it. I did like that there was a fight for the Pentagon Driver (aforementioned armdrag was slick as all hell). That dueling Destroyer stuff killed me, too. Just, okay, I want to make this clear to today’s pro wrestlers: Just because you can trade moves to build up heat doesn’t mean ANY move will do. Yes, even your precious Canadian Destroyer. Yes, when Misawa traded neck-breaking Germans with Kawada or Kobashi or Akiyama 20 years ago, it was just as dumb. It makes NO sense. NONE. I’ll say this about Striker: He did EVERYTHING he could to put this thing over as more than it was. Presentation matters, folks. But this fell flat in so many ways for me. I’m glad the crowd found a way to enjoy it, but it’s just not my thing.

Rey Mysterio vs. Johnny Mundo

ER: This was a pretty wonderful match with some pretty historic levels of bullshit. My memory is spotty (as this show has somehow existed for a few years now) but I think this is the first time Dario has actually gotten physically involved in a match (I think he fought with Catrina but I don't think he got in the ring to alter an outcome), and I think this was the first time we had an appearance from Lucha Underground Security. The match itself was really fun, with Rey coming out fast as the aggressor and really pasting Mundo out of the ring and following to the floor with hard elbow shots. and Mundo was really great about using his body as a twisting, crashing weapon. Vampiro takes about 3 minutes and digs his heels in on a really terrible analogy about a jukebox, where I guess Mundo is a jukebox and Rey is a song on the jukebox and the analogy isn't working but he's convinced that the more he talks about the analogy the more the analogy might make sense, and it's the quietest we've ever heard Striker as he's completely letting Vampiro die on the vine and Vampiro just keeps rolling with it. The bullshit gets really fun, with Dario stopping a ref's count and then pie facing Mysterio. This has to be the first time he's gotten physical with a non-Matanzas wrestler, right? Rey sets up the 619 on him, but Mundo gets to Rey and splats him with his finisher that usually overshoots. We get big Dominic running out to double leg Mundo, then paste a member of Lucha Underground Security with a running elbow smash on the escape. Love it.

TL: Holy crap. Vampiro sets this one up as Rey as LeBron James, saying he’s “come home” to get back to his roots. That is a hell of a statement. And Vampiro’s made a lot of statements. Between that and the jukebox thing, along with Striker in the previous match, I’m looking to see if there’s a SAP feed. Rey plays his hits pretty well, with the face-first bump under the bottom rope and the slick baseball slide into the headscissors. He even pulls out the Dragonrana suicida he used to do with Eddie. It was not the pace I was expecting, to be honest. Was expecting more of a control segment from Johnny, but this being a 50/50 match was pretty good for me. I have no idea how there was a Rey Mysterio Canadian Destroyer in this match, but here we are. The worst security in the history of pro wrestling can’t even deal with Dominic. The Dario stuff was at least funny, and Johnny wins on a bullshit finish, which is 100% on brand. Definitely entertaining, definitely creative.


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Lucha Underground Season 3 Episode 29: The Hunger Inside

ER: I have to wonder if Cueto feeding Matanza a big plate of raw meat is an inside joke. When we were just starting Phoenix Pro Wrestling, my pal Josh (PPW owner/booker) drove down to meet up with JR Kratos and Jeff Cobb to film some things, and go over plans for the first few shows. And he said at one point that day the two of them ate this huge bowl of raw looking meat, while chatting, just getting that protein.

TL: So last episode, I was either uninterested (three matches with three indy standoffs to start off will do it to you) or Eric made all the good points already so I’m gonna jump right in and be all about this week’s episode. I hope. Matanza wanting raw meat that bad just makes me want sashimi, and also makes me want to go back to Japan. Hey! Jeff was in Japan in December! He ate steak! I don’t know if it was raw, but he ate steak! Gonna say with 100% confidence that this scene was the thing that got him to Japan. Deductive reasoning at its finest, baby.

1. Pindar vs. Fenix

ER: This delivered just about what I wanted, with Pindar dropping a bunch of big slams and powerbomb variations, hard elbow shots to the jaw and back of the head, and Fenix almost killing himself. My favorite part of the match was actually Kobra Moon choking Fenix in the corner while the ref was distracted. She really got that arm wrapped around his neck and sunk it in from a position of leverage. That choke is pro wrestling right there. Pindar threw some nice knuckle punches at Fenix's dome. Pindar still looks like Dirk Benedict at the end of Sssssss, and to my surprise we don't get a dozen shots of Melissa concerned for Fenix (just one!). Luckily, Pindar is base-y as hell because Fenix could have died doing that Spanish fly off the top. Finish is awesome with Fenix just jumping both knees first right into Pindar's guy, the way I used to jump off the back of the couch onto my poor father.

TL: Pindar as a base for Fenix’s shenanigans makes me giddy coming in. I have absolutely no idea what Vampiro’s talking about with Fenix’s black and white attire. Pindar with a fantastic quebradora that Fenix bumped crazy for. In fact, that’s just the beginning of an AWESOME run of Pindar offense. The spinning wheel kick in the corner is one of my favorite moves I’ve seen in a long time and was very Jerry Flynnesque. The monkey flip with Fenix doing the AJ Styles “wait until the last possible second to tuck and roll” bump was insane. Even Pindar’s crazy-ass Royal Butterfly slam just looked cool. Then Fenix one-ups him with his ridiculous springboard sole butt to the face, which basically always looks good. That Spanish Fly was definitely problematic, but Pindar snapping off for the bump was masterful. I really hope we get to see more of him this season. Great start, even with Fenix off his game.

TL: Jack Evans with a wired jaw is high comedy to me considering his body is basically made out of rubber. Still a better promo not being able to talk right than PJ.

2. Dante Fox vs. Prince Puma

ER: I'm so tired of writing up matches like these. I don't know what to say anymore. Big moves were hit, usually really well! Strikes were exchanged, dives were done; some of the moves looked really painful, but they probably weren't because neither guy seemed to have much trouble taking a move and then doing a move. Sometimes moves didn't hurt, and other times just doing a move might make you lie on the mat and breathe hard. At one point I actually forgot who was who, as it didn't really matter in terms of following along with the action. You knew cool things were going to happen, and after about 10 minutes of cool things then one of the guys would be pinned. Both men may as well have been wearing Green Man jumpsuits, as it really didn't matter who was doing what. This was the sexiest of the sexy dance fighting. Do you remember years and years ago, when (I think) Eric Bischoff suggested making pro wrestling an Olympic sport, with judges and points systems? A lot of us within our circle laughed it off and knew it would just be cooperative gymnastics specifically appealing to judges instead of crafting something interesting. Well, this - and a lot of popular current wrestling style - is cooperative gymnastics specifically appealing to judges. This is wrestling seeking star ratings and chants, all that's missing at this point is breathing heavily while holding your pose at the end of your Bolero routine. These two should enter some kind of swing dancing competitions or something. There's a whole touring circuit out there that's missing them.

TL: So this has all the makings of all of the crazy athleticism of Ricochet/Ospreay, matches that I actively disliked due to the choreography. Also, Striker calling Puma/PJ Black a five-star matchup is such pandering bullshit it makes me take him less serious than ever. And yeah, this match doesn’t start off the way I’d like it to, as both guys do the dive tradeoff as the substitute for your normal indy standoff; selling not even optional, more like non-existent. Something finally happens when Puma catches the Fox moonsault, only for it to be a DDT that looked sick enough that if it got no-sold, I would have just skipped the match entirely. Fox grabbing a chinlock after four minutes, with the way this match started, would make Kevin Owens laugh out loud. Randy Orton doesn’t even have the balls to do that. Then, when Puma goes right back on offense, it’s as if the Fox “control segment” didn’t even matter. And now they go into a damn rollup sequence and then a ludicrous kick-trading sequence. AND THEN THEY SELL FATIGUE TO TRADE ELBOWS. Good lord almighty. One of the reasons Dragon Lee/Kamaitachi at least worked was that they built up to stuff in a way and sold high impact stuff in a way that at least made sense. This was a cherry picked version of that match where selling only mattered to remember the next sequence. Striker also literally calls a brainbuster a “modified Jackhammer” in this match. I know Puma’s moving on. You know Puma’s moving on. I am moving on from this match because it’s just not even close to the type of wrestling I can enjoy. I’ll just say this: Ricochet going to NXT is going to 100% work out for my personal enjoyment of him because they’ll figure out the best way to tone him down and accentuate his strengths. At least until they sign Ospreay in a year or two.

TL: Oh, so NOW they figure out Cage killed a guy with the power glove. This is the worst police department of all time. I do think it’s hilarious they somehow got the TV feed from Cortez’s match as Veneno, as if they can access the shows at any time. I have a feeling they can get the Tom Magee/Bret Hart match.

3. Johnny Mundo vs. Dragon Azteca Jr.

ER: [I'm not sure what happened, as I wrote this up some time ago and when I went to post, I had nothing written for this match, no memory of what happened in it, no clue what happened to whatever I originally wrote]

TL: We get a close look at Ron Funches and the Mysterio family in the crowd, with Dominic looking big. Striker references them often in this one, so I figured I’d just get it out of the way now. This match coming in was something I’d be interested in if Dragon literally works this like Rey would against Mundo, but instead, he gets off to a good start with an enziguiri and then a springboard rana that Mundo rolls outside for with a ridiculous bump. I have no idea why Azteca would do a forward roll before trying a pescado rana, but Johnny’s sick spinebuster counter off it is another great Mundo transition spot. Mundo’s control sequence is fun with his sliding knee and his always good-looking springboard kick. Azteca works really well from underneath here, and when he is able to vault Mundo to the floor, he hits a truly insane somersault plancha over the ringpost, complete with awesome camera shot. I also love Dragon’s unique kick counters, as he slides towards the corner off a whip and then just catches a charging Mundo in the face. I also love a good Toyota Roll, and Dragon does a great one here. Azteca also busts out the prawn hold from the top rope, which always looks nasty. Of course, Mundo trips up Dragon on the top and finishes with The End of the World (this one more of a headbutt than a splash). This was your normal good Mundo match. Postmatch, Mundo tries to go too far with the chair around Dragon’s neck, only for Rey to save him and take him to the back…which leads to Mundo coming back out and getting in Dominic’s face, with Dominic actually saying, “You know who I am.” Then he eats a belt shot while Rey gets held back by Johnny’s posse. It’s a great heat-seeking move, to be honest, even if it was telegraphed and the Mysterio family did no favors with their acting. Feel like this was a way better build-up than any of the “true fight” stuff from the weeks before.

TL: Yeah, this had way more meat for me to dig into this week, even if the only match I truly got into was the opener. Next episode has the Mil Muertes/Jeremiah Crane match that has had a build and is supposedly quite good, so we’ll see how well that stacks up.


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