Segunda Caida

Phil Schneider, Eric Ritz, Matt D, Sebastian, and other friends write about pro wrestling. Follow us @segundacaida

Sunday, August 09, 2020

Lucha Underground Season 4 Episode 21: Ultima Lucha Cuatro - Part 1

TL: We have gone from this series being one of the most sought after pieces of wrestling IP in a really long time to it being available for free on Tubi to watch from the built-in service that comes with my Smart TV. Just in time for us to put this show to bed for good over Ultima Lucha Cuatro. It's been so long since I've watched this I had to go back and read what I wrote for the last couple episodes to familiarize myself with it again but even then, I'm not sure I'll get there. This is very much going to be in-the-moment, based on the ringwork stuff from me. Character work be damned.

ER: So detective Vazquez has lived through a thousand years of society and she's just a cop? The things she must have seen, the dynasties she saw fall...and she's an LA detective? Are there vampires that just open their own paint store?

TL: For being 1,000 years old, Vazquez looks fantastic. Good for her. Extremely happy that her and Aerostar completed the pendant, as they're now going to be able to withstand a guard attack while traversing the Hidden Temple for their lost tribal icon. Hoping Olmec makes an appearance on commentary tonight.

ER: Lots to talk about in just the intros, because Vampiro makes the most ridiculous faces for the duration of Matt Striker's opening spiel. Vampiro was acting like he was reading along with a script, and was making these bug eyed affirmative faces every time Striker would finish a line. Also, it just hit me that Vampiro has hair. He was a big fat guy who voluntarily was shaving his head, intentionally looking like the boat zombie from Zombie!? Nobody shaves their head just to look cool, it's always a choice that's made for them. But Vampiro has hair and he makes reaction faces bigger than the biggest Jeremy Borash TNA reaction faces. Also, Melissa Santos' had a great dress/headband combo, very flattering and a cool style.


The Rabbit Tribe (Paul London/The White Rabbit/El Bunny) vs. Sammy Guevara/XO Lishus/Ivelisse vs. The Reptile Tribe (Jeremiah Snake/Daga/Kobra Moon)

ER: This kicked ass, the kind of bananas match you want from a LU multiman. I do wish the Rabbit Tribe hadn't been eliminated so early, but I like what they did while they were there. This could have been a real mess, but it turned out to be the best kind of mess. All of the jumbled attacks worked well when everyone was in the ring together, Jeremiah throwing big straight kicks at anyone on his path, then tossing his own team to their death. Jeremiah THROWS Kobra to the floor with a powerbomb, bouncing her right off White Rabbit, who just picks her up off the ground and throws her into the ringpost. Two great back to back bumps from Kobra, and the craziest one was yet to come. The dive train was cool, with El Bunny hitting a tiny tope con hilo while Ivelisse held open the ropes, then Ivelisse bent over the top rope while standing on the middle rope so Guevara could vault over her onto the pile (the camera guy really zoomed right up Ivelisse's birth canal, so I can only assume this episode was guest directed by Larry Clark), then Ivelisse flipped over the ropes to cap it off. I dug how everyone scattered, giving every side of the Temple a cool view of different action, but Sammy and Kobra Moon fight up to the top and get a great tease where Guevara almost throws her right off...before hitting a nutso Spanish Fly off the camera stage instead. Even though the move was performed perfectly and everyone was in place to catch, it's still flat out nuts. Plus, they did a great job in editing to not show the actual floor until they were flying off, so you had no idea if there were seven people or zero people down there to catch them. There were some strong pinfall saves, nice kicks to the back of the head, great use of fake blood when White Rabbit jams his gloved fingers down Guevara's throat, an awesome bit where XO fights back against the whole Reptile Tribe, just a ton of fun. This match really felt like season 1 LU, which is nothing but a big compliment.

TL: It's so wild to see Killer Kross go from LU to Impact to becoming The Next Big Thing in NXT in the span of like 18 months. I remember when he called out Batista at Bloodsport and kinda scoffed, but now he's pretty undeniable, and as if on cue, he destroys all six of his opponents only to eat a quintuple superkick. Guevara's excitement is so palpable here, and it's really wild to me that he got used as fodder for Jake Strong like he did. The big Spanish Fly dive was really well done, and him getting the first pin to eliminate the Tribe was a nice touch, but again, with how Kross was built up throughout the season, it seemed like a waste of him here, which unfortunately seems to be this season's MO. The blood was a great touch, like Eric said, but I would have just liked to see a Kross/Guevara singles match, especially with how much Guevara has impressed in his AEW run. The final fall started off really well with the Ivelisse near-fall, and even dug Vampiro's comparison to a World Cup match where a team gets a red card and has to play with 10. Okay, the timing of the near falls here has been REALLY good, and has done a good job of building up the challengers as underdogs, and XO's fire out of the corner really played up, and the extra shot by Jeremiah to give Daga the submission was a nice touch. The booking was a bit much, but the match was exactly what it needed to be given the stips. Feels like the least interesting team won, though.


Ricky Mundo vs. Taya

ER: This is exactly what it should have been: a mostly one sided massacre to blow off a story that never had legs. Once Mundo's creepy doll got involved this went beyond a dark obsession story into something into something eyerolling with no chance of an interesting payoff. And so, the only answer was to have Taya take everything in a short match. I liked Taya landing heavy on a couple crossbodies, the curb stomp looked good, and the post match table spot with Taya letting out her ruined wedding aggression was the best this was going to be. It's smart to know your limits and I'm glad they didn't make this into some overblown epic that it was never going to be. They spent the correct amount of time on it, and you need that kind of smart editing.

TL: I'm not really into this at all because of Ricky more than anything, but Taya showed some nice fire. I wish it was more one-sided than it actually was, with a Taya steamrolling being more emphatic, but LU has always been about the hand-holding for references to previous parts of the storyline, so given that, they hit all the right notes and Taya stood tall. As Eric said, was exactly what it should have been.


Mask vs. Mask: Son of Havoc vs. Killshot

ER: This didn't work for me. It never felt like an actual big stip match, really it didn't feel any different from any other singles match these two have had against any other LU opponent. There were big spots, but every LU match with these guys has the exact kind of big spots that this match had, this match just had less of them (so I guess that means that they are more important?). Plus, the big spots didn't really look that great. Havoc's three big moments all saw him land physically short with his arms in front of him, with Striker even having to cover for his short SSP landing by saying he got Killshot with his head. The camera stand dive looked big, but Guevara's Spanish Fly 20 minutes earlier off that same camera stand looked way bigger. I liked the superplex onto the gurney, but the set ups for all these spots felt like they could have been tightened up in editing. The big shock is when Dumb Donald finally takes off his knit cap to reveal Shane Strickland!

TL: The matches that led up to this left a lot to be desired, even though I came away from them thinking Killshot was at least trying to do a bit more than just throw out spots, and figured maybe the blowoff could lead to something more focused, but the focus came more from them remembering walking through their more complicated sequences. And then after the first Killstomp, it slows to a halt once the gurney gets involved, with them chewing up airtime more than them building up to big spots including either that or the table Havoc introduces. I think the play was for the match to be more deliberate than the Hell of War match, which was basically like a 20-minute adrenaline shot, but instead, it came off plodding, and knowing both the Hell of War match and what Sammy did earlier in the night, not even that Havoc splash in the table came off as good. The superplex into the gurney was pretty damn insane, but for Havoc to survive that, a Killstomp, and then a Storm Cradle Driver seems a bit much. The only thought in my head is "I really hope this doesn't end on a roll-up" and I'm holding on tight. I think the reason I'm not feeling this match as much is because I've seen a lot of the stuff they've done better either earlier in the night (strikes, dives, nearfalls) or in previous matches including either guy, but hey, if you're gonna finish a guy, a Shooting Star Press on a guy tied to a gurney will get it done. "History has been made!" says Matt Striker, and I agree, this match is now in my past. There just wasn't enough drama here for me to buy into the nearfalls, nothing was really earned. It came off flat and hollow. And wouldn't you know it, it's Jermaine Strickland, who basically drops the mic and heads for NXT mediocrity, which I guess is better than what can be said for most folks on this show. At the very least, it got the women in the crowd ready to cry, which is what you really need from an apuestas match. But not before Dante Fox shows up in stolen valor for their tribute to the troops as Strickland heads for Orlando.


TL: It really does feel like we're crawling to the finish line of this marathon, but I also feel like, especially given how the finale of previous Ultima Luchas have gone, we're going to see something absolutely wild given the environment they're working, which is really all you can ask for a show doing its swan song. At least send us home on a high note, even if it's been more slog than passion project this season.


COMPLETE GUIDE TO LUCHA UNDERGROUND


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Wednesday, November 13, 2019

Lucha Underground Season 4 Episode 16: Kill Mil

ER: Weekly reminder of just how awful every part of the Antonio Cueto character is.

TL: Oh man. So...you are a show that caters basically exclusively to hardcore fans. You then have MATT STRIKER READ A PREPARED STATEMENT to set up the main even that night? Over a highlight package? I mean...I never thought I'd say this, but Vampiro saying, "You say something? We got things to do!" after that was the best. Thank God for Vampiro. Praise Vampiro.


Jack Evans vs. Matanza

ER: This was pretty silly. I'm not sure what kind of character Evans is working, as he did a bunch of dialed to 10 mic work where he was just yelling annoying sounds and acting like a real goofball. Cool? Then he does a comical Mr. Furley stumbly run up the stairs only to run away from Matanza and get tripped by Antonio Cueto's cane. They're going for Looney Tunes vibes but also very serious Evans-will-leave-The-Temple-in-a-body-bag vibes and it doesn't really work. Evans vs. Matanza is a damn fun pairing, but this isn't that. This is Evans wide eyed running from Matanza, getting tossed a couple times, coming back briefly to hit a fantastic 630...only to see Matanza instantly shrug it off and hit the Tour of the Temple. This could have been a the best possible style clash, instead we had to pretend Jack Evans was suddenly a guy who couldn't wrestle very well.

TL: Jack Evans continues to be awesome on the mic, Antonio Cueto continues to be a terrible caricature in place of an actual good on-screen authority figure. Jack plays up the horror movie vibes better than most by knocking on the door to the entrance ramp only to be out of luck. Jack getting to run around a bit and be evasive only to eventually fall after a valiant effort is at least a good version of this match, but I would have liked a more competitive match between these two because it would have been good to watch. Evans rag dolling for peak Samoa Joe back in the ROH days was fantastic to see; him doing the same for Matanza would have ruled, too. Alas, all this for a cheap pop to hear Antonio warble about human sacrifice. I mean, literally seven months ago on WM weekend, a dude has his throat slit on stage during the absolutely terrible Blackcraft show. If you're gonna kill someone on a wrestling show, at least make it campy as fuck.

XO Lishus/Ivelisse/Joey Ryan vs. Jeremiah Snake/Daga/Kobra Moon

ER: This was rough in just about every way. Sloppy as hell, not a lot of build, just a mess of a match. Xo Lishus was probably the lone highlight; I love the snap he gets on things like armdrags, and really I just love the snap he puts on everything. Ivelisse has one of the more embarrassing hot tags of recent memory and later hits a slow motion cannonball off the apron. Daga even trips on the ropes getting into the ring. Striker calls Jeremiah Snake "this generation's most controversial athlete", which does sound much more intriguing than "some guy that a lot of people wish would just go away because they don't dig his fucking vibe" which is the reality. This was as skippable as it gets.

TL: Killer Kross as the White Rabbit is a good fit for the promotion; hope he calls out Big Dave in a knock off Tower of Doom match by season's end. The match itself was basically a mid-tier trios pairing with folks thinking up "creative" spots only for them to not land clean. XO probably looked the best in the match, Joey's shtick continues to be tired, Crane's descent to complete irrelevance continues. Daga with a weird Toryumon double arm-bar to finish. Kross and London stand idly by for the most part while Bunny gets the offense post-match, and I'm baffled again. This fed, folks.

Nunchuck Match: Aerostar/Drago vs. Jake Strong

ER: I'm a big fan of stupid stips matches, and a 2 on 1 handicap nunchucks match would certainly qualify as stupid, but Strong isn't a good enough stooge to make the nunchucks portion of this match interesting. We get the fun visual of actual nunchuck retrieval at the top of the Temple steps. At one point Aerostar and Drago pose as two children trying to sneak into an R rated movie wearing a very long trenchcoat, beating Jake with nunchucks. But Strong just kind of stands there and takes a dozen nunchuck shots, like he couldn't go anywhere. Every other time he took nunchuck shots he would just awkwardly bend over to take them, just poking his butt out. To put over a nunchuck shot you really need that scaled dog reaction, needs some hopping, some yelping, some fleeing; Ol' Jake Strong just behaved like he was in a very specific BDSM video. There were individual great moments, like Strong's vicious gutwrench powerbomb, or Aerostar's no hands springboard splash, but this didn't work as well as it could have.

TL: NUNCHUKS MATCH. I need Sleazy E out here in an exhibition at least. Jake Strong being treated as a top guy in AEW right now is still absolutely baffling to me (and he hasn't even wrestled a match!!!) but he's been at least a little bit entertaining taking on all the low-tier juniors, which should prepare him well for AEW. It's at least something that uses the gimmick well, even if the gimmick itself is terrible. The crowd chants "This is awesome!" for some reason, possibly the nadir of the chant, or maybe they're in on the joke. But let's point out what these guys did in their seven minutes: They had huge bumps, they laid shit in, and they went out there to maximize an absolutely limiting gimmick. I'm writing this match up as it happens, not after the fact, and this is actually becoming one of the great shitty gimmick matches LU has ever done. The finish was awesome stuff. They also 100% went early on the bone break sound effect. I am going to look back on this fondly as one of the great examples of everything both bad and good about LU: The gimmick is terrible, the entire setup is basically shit. But guys went out there and killed it, did everything they could to maximize what they were given, and somehow, someway, production values made it look not nearly as good as it could have. I can't think of a single 15-minute segment in any LU show that captures all that. Amazing stuff.

Mil Muertes vs. King Cuerno vs. Dragon Azteca Jr. vs. Pentagon Dark

ER: This didn't add up to a ton, made everyone except Pentagon feel super marginalized, which is a repeat trend for PPP. We also got some more Fenix coming out to assault Melissa Santos, which is great because then he will still wrestle the same way and get cheered for his cool spots, so what is actually the point of doing that kind of storyline? It does lead to our no close second greatest part of the match, when Dragon Azteca hits an incredible tope con giro over the ringpost, crashing both of them into the announce table. Awesome, awesome spot. I have to assume the rest of this was mangled by hasty editing, because the only other option was that it was mangled by foolish match layout: Cuerno hit his big tope into Pentagon and Muertes, except Pentagon was back up to the apron as quickly as Cuerno, only for both of them to be hit by a Muertes spear to knock them off the apron. So either Pentagon sold a Cuerno tope - treated like a major move for much of the series - by immediately leaping up to the apron, while Muertes sold it by running to the other side of the Temple to get in the ring for his spear...or the editing was so trash that it just made the wrestlers look like trash. Neither is a good look.

TL: Things I knew were going to happen before this match started: Muertes was gonna rule ass for a few minutes, Penta was definitely going to be on the outside in a 4-way match when you shouldn't have any downtime due to the fact everyone can at least face someone, Cuerno was gonna hit his tope, Dragon was gonna out-effort everyone. AND THEN HE DOES THAT CORNER DIVE. HOLY SHIT. It's weird to think a match like this is so methodically paced, but that's LU for you. Willie Mack coming back to cost Mil the match was a cool twist. And then of course Penta wins. Muertes taking the fall was surprising but I guess if they're pairing folks off, Mack/Muertes in a deathmatch should be fun, at least. Match was 100% a mean multi-man LU match. Like Eric said: Production here was really off again, selling was off all around. Again, I feel like there's just a lot of things that are supposedly creative but done in a way that doesn't play to anyone's strengths. It used to be the hallmark of this show but now it seems like that's all gone by the wayside. Really rough to see at this point. Azteca/Fenix has a chance to be good, Mack/Muertes could be a defining match for two guys I thoroughly enjoyed in this fed, and Penta somehow ending up the last LU champ will be fitting in a way because they really had nobody else to go to, it seems. Maybe they'll still surprise me. Who knows.



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Thursday, February 21, 2019

Lucha Underground Season 4 Episode 14: Pet Cemetary

TL: Eric sent me this review literally five weeks ago and I haven't even begun to get to it. Between the holidays, a trip to New Orleans where I dressed up as a banana on New Years Eve and was the talk of Bourbon Street, a new job at a place I actually love working at, moving into a new place for the first time in almost a damn decade, and my waning love for a product I once fervently enjoyed, I held this up probably longer than I should have. I'll take the L on this one, as the kids say. However, I will say that I'm seeing this out to the bitter end. I will find the love where I can.

Ivelisse vs. Dragon Azteca Jr.

ER: I thought this was really great, probably my favorite LU match of the season, and that is an unexpected thing. It told such a fine story and was a really fantastic babyface performance from Ivelisse. It really had a great pull and in a fed that hasn't done a great job building to triumphant title victories, midway through this I was genuinely interested in rooting Ivelisse to victory. That's special whenever it happens. Ivelisse has been dealt kind of a bum wrap due to injuries. She's had two big injuries that happened right when she was getting big momentum and they cut her right off. After this performance I thought she would make a great choice for a Mae Young Classic deep run. Rachel was watching this with me and sometimes she pays attention, sometimes she doesn't (though she seems to pay attention the most during women's matches), but midway through this match she says, "Hey she's really good. I forgot we were watching a man vs. woman match." It's not that she's bridging the gap with power spots, but she's working like a fun Rey Mysterio underdog and her execution lands heavy enough that the weight difference is plausible. Her strikes look good, her headscissors and armdrags have good pull, and I like her crisscross stuff off the ropes. She has really expressive reactions and it was awesome to see this big babyface performance on TV without it getting into overly emotional Gargano territory. Azteca played his part well, he didn't work this as a heavy breathing try hard babyface, he worked subtle heel and he did it well. It would have been easy to chicken out and work face vs. face but he was kind of a dick, not hesitating to work snug with a lady, doing cool little things like whipping her arm into the mat. This was really good, and I really hope this is a star making moment for Ivelisse. The fans have been over the top for her since the beginning, and fuck it, let her get imbued with some kind of paranormal super powers and have her destroy Penta H in the series finale. It's all I want now.

TL: I like Azteca and feel like Ivelisse can be good in small doses, but reading Eric's first sentence made me take pause. I mean, he said himself it was unexpected, so that means I get to look at this in a totally different manner than he did. Totally expected, if you will. Vampiro putting Dragon Azteca "Between #1 and #2" on his Best in the World list is certainly a take, hope he puts in a #WDKW100 ballot. I do like Azteca basing for Ivelisse early, as her arm drags are actually really fluid and her lucha background is sound. The match itself is really basic, but well done. Azteca has good cutoffs, good snap on his offense, deep submissions, and it amplifies Ivelisse's offense. I'm starting to see why Eric enjoyed this match so much. That DDT off the ropes was nasty and Azteca took it on the dome. This is so much different than your normal LU match where folks are trying to get in ridiculous moves for two counts. These two are simplifying things and it's making the bigger moves mean that much more. Right on cue, Azteca doing the damn Pillman bump off the stair rail on his missed dive was disgusting. The stretch run from there is really fun, as Ivelisse expands on her fun offense and Azteca doing simple reversals gives it more impact. Yeah, that was a great match. I'd have to think a bit on whether it's the match of the season so far, but that match had absolutely no reason to be that good and it overdelivered. The improvement Ivelisse has shown after her injury riddled third season is noticeable. She can go. Really impressive showing here.

King Cuerno vs. Mil Muertes

ER: I thought this was money too, even if Cuerno has lost significant luster since season 1. It's a big boy battle that only goes a few minutes before ending in a DQ (a LU rarity), but we get a tremendous Mil performance and a super fun slugfest finish. Cuerno felt on Mil's level a few seasons ago, a guy who could be the potential top guy in the fed, and while that feeling isn't really there for me anymore he's still a guy who makes a fun match for Mil. Mil's big right hand might be my favorite thing in the fed, and I loved him crushing Cuerno with corner lariats before dropping him with that right. But the big fireworks in this one happen once they both spill to the floor, as they do nothing more than throw punch combinations at each other. Stand and Trade is such a fickle thing for me, as it's kinda like art: I know I like it when I like it. Here I liked it, just two dudes landing big rights to the jaw, real nice worked punches that would have played well even without sound sweetening, both mixing it up with occasional body shots, some cool close up magic from both. Marty Elias tries to get them back in the ring and gets violently shoved into the front row of fans for the DQ, Elias taking a great backwards bump into the fans. This all worked for me.

TL: I'm surprised this didn't get saved until Ultima Lucha, honestly, as it really could have been built to another big match between these two who are a great pairing. I always gush on Muertes' offense, but everything he does in this setting looks so crisp. His working punch is tremendous, and then he throws these standing mounted punches that look like crap when other folks try them but he makes look good. Also gets to hit his snap powerslam and his awesome chokeslam, so I'm sufficiently entertained. This is being worked with urgency, which it should be considering their history, and I dig it. The punches they trade back and forth are fantastic, and they are absolutely hauling off on each other. Whenever the camera misses a cut on a punch and you see the impact, you can see just how they thud. I mean, I don't know who told them to go out and work a goddamn Lawler/Dundee match, but God bless whoever did. Digging the Double DQ because you could buy them tossing Marty Elias aside, but I don't like them getting "rewarded" by getting into a match with Triple P. Maybe his laziness will make him want to stand aside and let these two haul off on each other? Because that's what I want.

Aerostar/Drago/Fenix vs. The Reptile Tribe

ER: This was mostly a rush job to serve as a backdrop for a pretty - on the surface - pointless rudo turn from Fenix. I thought the match was going along fine until the silly turn, with Drago putting in a nice showing (good to see after his brutal performance against Jake Strong), getting launched into a cool dive by Fenix and hitting this trippy assisted headscissors out of the corner. Jeremiah Snake (ugh) had nice snap on his lariats and bumped big for the fliers. Everything was going fine. Then Fenix turned on Aerostar and made really made grouchy faces, and shoved Melissa to the ground. I think the Melissa/Fenix videos were among the best of those kind of vignettes they've done. They were silly, but silly in the way that I wanted, and always sweet. That's important. A turn this late in the game makes no sense, and I can't imagine anyone who was excited when seeing it happen. We'll see where it goes I guess, but this show is in the home stretch at this point, why end something like this on a sour note?

TL: I can buy Jake Strong taking on three dudes after his recent Bellator win where he looked like a goddamn machine so I'm all in on him calling folks out like that. Dark Fenix being an obvious foreshadowing for his eventual teaming up with his brother is a choice. This is my contractually obligated sentence where I talk about how I miss Pindar. Daga started working Dragon Gate recently. He's no Adam Mayhem, but at least his offense has a bit more snap to it. Really odd to see this style of wrestling after a match featuring more traditional lucha and then an all-out brawl, so it's tough for me to get into it, but also, I like maybe, what, 2 people in this match? Fenix when he's on is damn good and I've seen Kobra work some great matches in tag teams in 2018. Dark Fenix's offensive outburst was tremendous and he's that much better than his brother's dark persona in all of 75 seconds. The heel control segments in this match just aren't engaging at all. Really think this should have been worked as more of a sprint. Aerostar hits a nice Silver King dive, Dragon hits that vaulted tornillo, and then Fenix does the turn given away by his black outfit. Because that means he's evil. I agree with Eric: Losing Fenix/Melissa is a huge blow for this series' production values and for love in general. Because getting the Lucha Bros. together in LU is more important than love, I guess. It's not at all. Not even a little bit.

TL: Okay, this is an honest question: Does Antonio Cueto know how to open a beer bottle? Was that a hammer he was using to open his Modelo? Dying to know where Marty got all that cash, too. I know he's got "aztec blood" in him, but who's the benefactor giving him all that cash?




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Thursday, November 29, 2018

Lucha Underground Season 4 Episode 10: A Snake Scorned

Saltador vs. Matanza

ER: A good cult leader occasionally needs to sacrifice one of his acolytes to either test their faith or further control them, but you gotta be really careful when you only have a couple followers to start with. You can't sacrifice your entire cult, you need to build up some numbers before you start sacrificing. I liked Saltador all tingly from molly, tickling and caressing Matanza, hitting a nice pop-up dropkick, then getting wasted. It does come off silly that they keep calling these minor beatings "sacrifices" (and really, we've seen tons worse one-sided beatings in this fed), when we've already had two ACTUAL murders happen this season. Taking a powerslam feels a little bit underwhelming when we're comparing it to a beheading.

TL: I think London deciding not to be like Jim Jones or David Koresh and going down with the folks whose minds he’s enslaved is a neato twist on the idea of a cult. Like he got an advanced copy of “Wild Wild Country” and realized the best way to control folks is to just be the outspoken leader and have honest-to-god minions. Kind of self-perpetuates the idea you’re that much more important than the others AND gets the point across that you also can’t fully protect anyone from anything that leads to their imminent demise. We all get sacrificed eventually.

Point is, molly or not, Salty should have known better.

TL: Killshot with a good cocky promo and it might be the most I’ve ever liked him when he wasn’t in a death match. Like actual motivation for him now. Totally throws me off.

Killshot vs. Dragon Azteca Jr.

ER: This had a lot of really dumb dance partner practice run stuff, a couple parts where it genuinely looked like they were just practicing their routine so they could be ready for the semis. For every move that looked cool (Azteca leaping from top rope to apron to give Killshot a rana, Killshot hitting his Fosbury Flop dive to the floor), there was another moment that just looked like poor exhibition; Azteca and Killshot struggling to get a knucklelock that allowed Killshot to get Azteca on his shoulders (what is with so many people having offense now that requires their opponent to be on their shoulders? Is this stupid Kenny Omega influence? I can't think of a more unnatural spot for an opponent to end up than seated on your shoulders, like Killshot took his girlfriend Azteca to Glastonbury), or one awful spot where Killshot took ages to set up an arm submission, Azteca just standing still while Killshot walks around him holding his arm, both men working on material while we watch. Match was as expected: Had some big moves, none of the moves hurt the other enough to keep them from hitting their own moves.

TL: I really don’t get why folks who are athletic need to do these cooperative spots that never look good or fluid or smooth. It’s a really messed up way to look at it from a psychology standpoint: The human mind anticipates the big move and basically ignores everything leading up to it, which is why spots like that still get pops. It doesn’t matter if it makes sense. Only if it looks good at the end. There’s a couple spots here that read like, “Okay, so you can read the dude’s mind and anticipate his moves, but you can’t actually move when he’s doing the move.” It’s just mind numbing. The Killstomp 100% should have gotten a 2 count (maybe not even that) because Killshot didn’t even hit him even barely with it. The DDT to finish wasn’t so flashy that it outranked things like a DVD on the apron. Just really, really weird match layout, and that’s saying something for Lucha Underground.

ER: Aerostar/Drago bit was a fun tiny fantasy moment of undying friendship between a dragon and a spaceman, with the music doing a good job to capture the mood. It's tough to film male friendship, but I liked this. It was short and simple and I think they need more tiny character moments like this. With commonplace murders they've gone beyond over the top, and Striker just treats every single match like it's extremely important, so really nothing feels important at all. But friendship? That's something I can get behind.

TL: On my feed that I watched for this episode, the music bled over into the beginning of Melissa’s ring intro for the trios titles match and I figured it was because the producers loved the beat that much. I really don’t blame them. It was like a hip-hop version of those old silent films where you see folks move their mouths and then a screen card comes on with what they said afterwards. Like if you did an old Laurel and Hardy film but with someone producing the ragtime music on Garageband.

Daga/Jeremiah Snake/Kobra Moon vs. Son of Havoc/Killshot/The Mack

ER: Striker is so weird underselling Vibora's decapitation. Minutes ago he was flipping out for a dance aerobics routine and sounding like he'd never witnessed a tornado DDT before, now he says during a ring entrance "Well you may note Vibora is absent, as we just witnessed his decapitation," so he clearly knows about a murder, doesn't care about it, and is also going to continue talking about Worldwide Underground as good guys. The vibe of this whole season has been pretty fucked. But this match was really fun, and cooperative in a good way as any cooperation lead to an immediate crash. We had a ton of dives (loved Havoc hitting a move and then flying past the ringpost with one, it's typically a good idea to lift something from Santito if you can), Mack hitting a big flip dive, Moon getting tossed into a dive (like that trend, make her into a man-propelled wrecking ball), and we got a few nice showcases of Mack and Jeremiah's stiff work. The match starts with a weak Daga strike combo, so it's alarming when Mack comes in and really pounds him with an elbow. Like, oh, yeah, that's what that's supposed to look like. I like how Snake and Mack interact (I keep accidentally typing "Snack", which feels like a name Meltzer might give Callihan if he continues to chub out, and now I want a Halloween episode where Mack dresses like Callihan and calls himself Jeremiah Snack, box of cookies in hand), like how Snake cuts off Mack's turnbuckle handstand with a stiff kick. This whole thing had a real nice flow, and there's no reason the multiman division shouldn't be the strongest in the fed. The title win felt a little underwhelming, even after a good match, and Killshot berating Havoc after the loss will surely lead to another Killshot feud I don't want to see. But overall, this was a fun one.

TL: HA. I also noticed Striker basically no-selling a decapitation based on all the madness-based murders that have happened this season. Didn’t even go with the Owen Voice or anything. Just another line read. “Lucha Underground: We Got Murders!” He also no-sold Mack’s amazing satin jacket. As someone who weighed 300+ pounds a short while ago, seeing Sami start to be a bit heavy makes me take pause given where he was during the Finlay matches. The dives were fun, Mack was the most fun, the wacky tandem offense with Sami and Kobra was fun. Finish was deflating. Killshot unraveling after being so cocky doesn’t do it for me. We’ve already seen brooding Killshot, don’t need more brooding in my pro wrestling. The postmatch Killstomp was probably the best one ever because he just sprung up and did it. No posturing or bullshit or nothing. But yeah, I don’t need to see a super light-hitting feud between these guys.

ER: We get a match ending brawl between Cage and Pentagon that starts fairly lethargic, but gets good when Pentagon brains a member of Metalachi with his own guitar. Striker actually made me chuckle with "Probably the biggest hit they'll ever have!" We do focus a bit too much on a black priest with a bad pun name (Father Rick O'Shea, har har har) making big gasping faces like he's permanently reacting to some Drag Race shade. And I think this might be the debut of a silly arm cracking sound effect when Pentagon snaps his arm. I'm pessimistic about the match next week, but I'll hope for the best.

TL: Cage out here looking like he’s wearing something out of Shane Douglas’ closet circa 1996, and yeah, it starts off slow but really picks up. Not the best LU brawl, but not the worst. I’m more than over Pentagon at this point, and I don’t think it’ll be a bomb-throwing match, which is what it should be, but I just want it to be a car wreck at this point.

TL: How dare Eric no-sell Mack taking the incredibly tacky witches hat off Cueto’s head, putting it on his own head in response to being put in a “Haunted House Match” with Mil Muertes, and saying “Trick or Treat, mother fade to black”. Virtuoso performance by the LU MVP.




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Monday, November 05, 2018

Lucha Underground Season 4 Episode 9: A Match Made in Heaven

ER: This may be an odd question...but was that actually Melissa playing Mariposa in the opening segment with Cueto? Her voice sounded completely different from how I remember her sounding (not merely the absence of her minor speech impediment, her voice just sounded different), and the mask covers enough that I actually have no idea.

TL: Was that…a competent set up for the main event? Like, did they actually lay out the consequences in a cogent manner for us to understand? Wild, man.

Mala Suerte vs. Matanza

ER: So now we've established bunny hop "boings" and speed bags SFX to our LU SFX canon. This was short but nobody died. Suerte hit a great baseball slide dropkick to start, Matanza hit a nice headbutt to cut off bunny hops and hit the Wrath of the Gods. But again, nobody died, which seems important to point out now.

TL: I literally cannot add anything to what Eric said about this match when those SFX were involved. Peak pro wrestling production, that.

Joey Ryan/Jack Evans vs. XO Lishus/Ivelisse

ER: I really liked this, especially as a showcase for Evans and Lishus. I wasn't excited for Joey opposite another woman, but I liked the turn into Joey being a full blown sex addict, just wanting any kind of touch and contact with any human (at minimum, any human). I think him being into getting slammed into XO Lishus' juicy hot ass and liking it is an important thing to happen. Sex addict is far more interesting than overt pervert. Lishus is a ton of fun, a great take on an exotico. The splits legdrop is good, and I also realized with his outfit, butt stuff, splits...he's basically cosplaying as Naomi. That feels like a level of exotico we haven't had in wrestling, an actual drag routine paying tribute to a fan favorite. The cartwheel slap is great with the character, and there was a hilarious moment with he and Evans, where Lishus ducked a clothesline and landed in a crabwalk, Evans overran him with the miss, ran back, but was chased into the corner with a quick burst of crabwalking from Lishus. Evans played it great, the timing was down, a genuinely funny and unique moment played perfectly. They went way too heavy on SFX for Ivelisse, she had a couple weak shots that came off comical with the loud thigh slap sound, but stuff like armdrags and ranas looked fine and she ate Ryan's offense well. Evans is still finding his place without WU, and I hope he's featured more from here now that he's away from WU. But he and Lishus owned here.

TL: I want to be a part of the conversations Joey has had with other folks to try and figure out how he could evolve his character. As Eric said, the climb from pervert to sex addict seems like the natural next step for him and who better to bring it out of him than Lishus, who has the athleticism that makes it look like he can hang with Jack F’n Evans step for step. Evans’ athleticism never ceases to amaze me; his springboard moves look out of control but also look like they kill folks. Yeah, the Lishus/Evans stuff was terrific, which led to the absolutely disgusting finish with the omoplata that really looked like a chokeout as opposed to all the other loosely applied MMA finishes you’d see in wrestling today. Stoked to see this get a longer feud, too. Ryan and Ivelisse were definitely in this match.

Mariposa vs. Dragon Azteca Jr.

ER: This was so short and really a nothing match. It was presented as an obstacle for Azteca but he didn't have too much trouble with Mariposa. It's a Lucha Underground update on an old early 90s Wrestling Challenge squash match. In one of those matches the enhancement talent would maybe get a dropkick or a couple elbows that get no sold. In a Lucha Underground squash match the enhancement talent still gets to break out a Kudo Driver moments after taking a huge 450 splash. The times they are a changin'.

TL: Love the foul to start the match during the belt presentation, love the kick to the inside of the thigh even more. Also love how in 2018, a 450 splash and a fucking KUDO DRIVER get 2.9s, but crossing the legs on a rolling prawn hold? Can’t get out of that, no siree. But hey, I’ve never wrestled before, so I don’t understand psychology, I guess.

The Reptile Tribe vs. Worldwide Underground

ER: So Striker says that Vibora is "striking in his absence" meaning nobody else knows about Vibora's death, but you'd think his absence would be focused on a lot more if that was the case. Instead they're just immediately cool with lizard Jeremiah Crane being the replacement. Also, could we have maybe done a little better than Jeremiah Snake? Here are a few off the top of my head with similar vocal patterns: Jereboa Crane, Jereviper Crane, Jereconda Crane. They aren't rhymes, but the syntax is the same as his original name and they roll off the tongue similarly. Or, they could have embraced their ridiculous side and further have their cake and eat it too, and he could have been Janaconda Cobrane. Also, I like that even in a rare 4 on 4 match, Ricky Mandel still isn't good enough to make the cut. I want them do have a 10 man tag to see if he has a shot at getting some playing time.

And I really liked this match. It was the right amount of fun and action, and really the fed should run more 8 man tags. I've gotten tired of their go to singles match style, but throw any 8 people from the roster in a ring and they should all have enough material to work a fun 10 minute match. You get less reliance on kickouts and more reliance on saves at that point, and a well timed save is more exciting to me than a big kickout. We get a ton of big dives, some complicated (like Kobra Moon getting launched into everyone by Jeremiah) and a couple impressive Aerostar ones, and a huge cannonball into everyone by Jeremiah. The pacing was kept brisk, and the whole thing was kept light which is a good thing because serious matches typically feature Striker reading a bunch of lousy copy about the Fates of Worlds and the Calamity of Man. The post-match worked for me too, even though the Macho Man stuff was all really obvious, I loved the Pomp and Circumstance playing while Mundo had Taya up on his shoulder. Taya's reaction to the proposal was good and as I've been wondering the past couple weeks this surely throws WU into full babyface, which isn't a bad twist. I somehow didn't notice the relevance of the episode title, which now seems like it should be saved for the inevitable wedding episode of LU, and I also somehow foolishly never considered a wedding episode for LU. We're well over 100 episodes at this point, and if we actually want to pretend that this is an actual TV series and not wrestling, then we're already into syndication and we're overdue for a wedding and a baby. We've already gotten to the point of the show where it's consistently going downhill from its peak, so now we need a couple of classic ratings poppers!

TL: The graphic leading into this match looks like it was made for an ECW TV main event in 1997, which is terrific. Big wet fart for the return of Crane as part of the Reptile Tribe. Don’t care enough to even make fun of the name. Aerostar wearing the bandana over his mask is as goofy looking as Klay Thompson wearing the bandana during his 14 3-pointer game last week, which means I love it. Vibora had been getting better so I’m a bit sad he’s not a part of this, because this seems like the type of match where he’d really stand out.

More wild atomicos match than I would have thought with this set up, as I figured there would be more pairing off than a whole bunch of dives, but they wanted a frenetic pace from the start. PJ Black’s hot tag that began with a bunch of first week training offense after the springboard was amusing. Nothing like armdrags and shoulder blocks to fire things up. The more I hear “Jeremiah Snake” the more I cringe. He also gets a lot of the match here, which is disappointing. Would have loved to see more Moon and Drago, especially considering Aerostar was brought in specifically because of his past with Drago. Instead, Drago gets to watch Aerostar hit his second ridiculous dive of the match and then take the fall. Postmatch was actually cool for the fakeout, Johnny being magnanimous, and the two-bit Savage aping. It was ELIZABETH who did the “Ooooohh yeah” part, man. C’mon. I’m not sure what wedding day shenanigans will occur to hold it up before it actually happens, but I’ve been entertained by WU skits to the point where I’d at least enjoy it. Can’t remember too many happy RobRod movie marriages, but maybe they’ll make an exception here.



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Thursday, September 13, 2018

Lucha Underground Season 4 Episode 4: Pain, Love and Sacrifice to the Gods

TL: Catrina trades in the dominatrix starter kit for the Jessica Rabbit dress sans sparkles thanks to a reverse Snow White? I mean, considering the magic threshold on this show, a wardrobe change seems like an odd way to show off your newly stolen lifeforce. Also, I’m sorry, but the dude’s LITERALLY NAMED FENIX. As in, HE RISES FROM THE DEAD. How are we not supposed to see him coming back from the dead after this? “Hey, Mark. We’re gonna call you Big Mac not because you’re super strong and your last name is McGwire, but because you’re a big fan of Burger King.” Zigging when they should zag, man.

Also, we get Striker saying Famous B might need a literal leg amputation due to what Jake Strong did to him two weeks ago, which is less believable than anything that happened with Catrina to open the show.

Big Bad Steve vs. Jake Strong

ER: Damn this was shaping up to be my favorite match of the new season, as it had the pacing of a cool big dude stiff fest (really looking forward to see what Google hits we get from "big dude stiff fest"), but then it kind of quickly flipped switch into full Jake Strong showcase squash. Strong and his flesh beard still come off a little mouth breath-y, but with Steve's bumping he came off pretty badass. Steve threw a couple of thee fucking best punches of 2018 in the middle of this, throwing one corker, and than a wrist bending shot right off Strong's forehead, staggering him. Strong had big shots to the gut, hard back elbows, stiff avalanche, wrestling tougher than I expected from his Impact run. After the match Strong hits a nasty powerbomb on the floor, Steve really getting planted. This was cool, really could have been awesome with a bit more time.

TL: Not gonna lie: Kinda want a shirt with the Big Bad Steve logo on it. The fact they actually made a logo for him is awesome considering a lot of folks in WWE can’t even get a damn shirt made. Steve has some great right hands as previously mentioned, as someone named Big Bad Steve should have, but they just look nasty as all hell, even with Strong’s stiff strikes going right back at him. Really shows how even the simplest of offense can make someone look good like that. We lost our boy Pindar due to beheading at the end of last season, so I’m definitely down to see Steve in his place as burly base with good looking offense. Strong squashes are necessity due to what they want him to be this season, but yeah, I wish this had more back and forth to it. Still, a good piece of business, as the kids say.

TL: As good as lucha masks and sweet suits are, lucha masks and cowboy hats are basically right there with them, and Cuerno makes it look good. Cage gets to flex and flex into a Muertes match next week and yeah, I am on board for that.

Daga/Kobra Moon vs. Johnny Mundo/Taya

ER: Really fun match, Mundo and Taya working full on babyface, and Taya looks to be having a blast with it, and it's kind of infectious. She really laid it in too, hitting some spirited back elbows and strikes, kicking Moon in the back of the head and hitting a sick curb stomp that bounced her forehead off the mat. Mundo hit his timing spots nicely, he and Taya actually come off tas the rare cool "shades of gray" characters, that can work either way one week to the next. Moon took a nice beating here, and Daga runs nicely into Mundo kicks. I liked this a lot more than I expected (just like Strong's performance, I must be in a real good mood, leaded instead of unleaded.

TL: I really want to like Daga because he’s got the athleticism and looks like a guy who can hang either as a tecnico or rudo, but he just doesn’t have charisma like you’d think. Taya was the standout here, doing a good lucha sequence with Daga and just bringing the stiffness with her strikes. That curbstomp was NASTY, as was PJ Black’s kick to set it up. Don’t know if I liked it as much as Eric, but it certainly didn’t suck.

ER: We're definitely into Leaded territory here because I dug that Vibora wrecking ball segment after the mixed tag. Vibora hitting goateed lizard cannonballs and big boots was apparently just what I needed.

TL: So Vibora goes off in the offseason and has some honest-to-god improved offense and looks like way better ring presence. Suffice to say, if this Vibora is the one we get this year, count me in.

Mr. Pectacular vs. Matanza

ER: I didn't feel like seeing Mr. Pectacular (although maybe in my good mood I'd like him in a gassed Power Plant trainee kind of way), and Matanza puts in a nice unlocked and unleashed squash. He hits a cool twisting back suplex after throwing Pecs into the corner, and then hits probably his greatest Wrath of the Gods, stopping, pivoting, feet leaving the mat to slam him the other way. A nice comeback for a person who murdered someone by ripping their face off a couple seasons ago.

TL: Pec just makes me miss Tino Sabbatelli (who, coincidentally has a pec injury right now), but he takes a great beating here. The Matanza body control points have been pointed out time and time again by us, but this was it at the top of its game. Everything had extra oomph to it, and sign me up for an unleashed Matanza, which was my favorite part of Season 2. This was a Mil Muertes-level squash here.

Chavo Guerrero Jr. vs. King Cuerno

ER: Wasn't expecting the comeback of Chavo, and it's good to see him still. a guy who should get more credit for what he's done. Chavo can still put on a good show, limps out a tweaked knee, hits a heavy crossbody, bumps hard over the top the floor, eats a chairshot, do some nice balance beam fight work around the raised barrier (which Cuerno hits a great high crossbody off of); Chavo is like the better version of David Sierra, and that's a good thing. We do get an unfortunately messy teeter totter spot, with Chavo setting up way close to the ropes, but Cuerno got through the spot well, and hit his bullet dive right after, which was convenient timing. I thought both came off well overall, but Cuerno came off stronger and that's more important.

TL: It’s funny that Eric waxes strong on Chavo to begin this after what I said about Muertes in our last review. Totally agree that he’s underrated in a way, and that he’s done a lot in a career that’s basically a quarter century long. I think I might be higher on Cuerno than other people, as I always liked his offense, and he shows off some personality here, too, playing to the crowd and helping build to the big spots, like the aforementioned bullet tope (preceded by an awesome top rope sunset flip). Guerrero shtick never really gets old, and Chavo knows how to do little things in matches that stick out. Enjoyable stuff and yeah, a good ending to a good top-to-bottom episode. The further we are away from the season premiere, the more this is turning into a show I enjoy watching again.

ER: My favorite episode of the season so far, We got manageable length matches with big dudes doing cool spots, just a really fun quick moving show. Felt exciting and action packed.


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Tuesday, November 21, 2017

Lucha Underground Season 3 Episode 21: Sudden Death

TL: How can Rey see Vampiro? Why do people keep punching mirrors? How can Vampiro get out of his facepaint so quickly? Is that in the budget to just keep breaking mirrors? Why am I looking for logic so much? Is it a reflection on my own search for self-worth?

Nah.

1. Johnny Mundo vs. The Mack

ER: I was a huge fan of All Night Long...Again. The second it finished I immediately started this episode, and I don't think anything in LU has ever made me want to immediately watch another episode right away. I thought the timing of the finish was great and loved that Mundo retained with essentially one second left on the clock. Dario runs it back and makes it Anything Goes, and that was a nice layer to add to everything they went through the prior week. And these two made excellent use of their new stips. The match was filmed two weeks after the iron man and I thought they did a pretty great job of picking the intensity back up from where they left it. They spill to the floor pretty early after Mack catches a Mundo springboard into a stunner. Mack hits a big cannonball into the seats and I loved the visual of Mundo holding up broken chair pieces to shield himself from more attack. Mandel comes out to run interference and we get some nicely integrated parkour as Mundo scrambles up into the upper bleachers to get away from Mack. Sexy Star comes out to get rid of Mandel and she does...I mean...literally the worst double leg takedown anybody has ever seen. I don't even know how Mandel knew to fall down from it. But we get the friends out of the way and Mundo crashes down from the upper levels with a great dive. Finish is pretty sick with Mundo getting a Taya-assisted sunset flip powerbomb onto a bunch of chairs, and Mack falls short again. I like that Mundo keeps retaining, and they keep finding ways to keep the belt on him that seem worthy. I really dug this match, loved the series.

TL: Eric and Phil did a great job talking about the All Night Long match, one of the more surprising matches I can remember watching and definitely the best thing I ever saw Mundo in. I wasn’t a fan of the finish considering there was a couple minute left for Dario to do his explanation. (There’s me looking for logic again. I think I’m failing here.) That being said, I dig the Falls Count Anywhere add-on because that’s gonna guarantee some more Mundo crazy gymnastics and Mack doing something crazy with his size somehow. The match even starts out like I hoped, with both guys trying to end it early because they spent so much time against each other the week before. The Stunner counter in particular was inspired, as was Mack’s realization that even with Johnny rolling to the outside he still had a shot due to the stip. THIS is the type of stuff that made me like LU in the first place, and when they do these things right, it’s still special.

And right on cue, there’s Mack doing something crazy with his size by doing that flip dive into Mundo sitting on chairs. And as Mundo parkours out of trouble into the stands, he does an absolutely insane corkscrew plancha off the edge of the bleachers after some Ricky Mandel interference. Stretch run here was fantastic, as the nearfalls all made sense and weren’t complete overkill, and Taya making her return to help Johnny win plays into how Johnny won the title and was the natural counter to Mack being a better street fight-type guy. Another really well-done match between the two, and Mundo as champ works extremely well. Best thing I’ve seen from LU in a long time.

ER: I think Cueto could have done a *bit* better on that trophy. You can go understated without looking cheap. I expected him to go understated and simple, or big and garish. This cup with the banners or bunting just looked flimsy.

TL: The Cueto Cup seems like it should have horns on it, or dripping with blood, or filled with whiskey. Is also peak Cueto for him to turn on a dime on Matanza for looking weak and giving Rey the title shot against Mundo, but at the same time, if Matanza doesn’t whoop up on Cueto, what the hell are they doing?

2. Aerostar, Fenix & Drago vs. Pindar, Vibora & Kobra Moon

ER: Well, I guess this was what it was. The lizard stable doesn't do much for me, I do not care about their plight. Drago has been falling stock for two seasons now so maybe joining up with the evil lizards will make him more interesting again. I think Pindar/Pain is a great addition to LU as he's an impressive base and can bump big. There were some sloppy set up moments that were just lazy (Pindar on the top rope and the Aerostar just climbing up the ropes and getting onto Pain's shoulders to help with a move) but Aerostar moves like no other wrestler and Pindar is a great guy to have catching him. I really like Fenix and think LU has been his best environment. He matches up here with Vibora who is not someone I'm interested in seeing. Nobody was asking for a lucha Lance Hoyt. But, I enjoyed the sequence of Fenix kicking him off the apron. The trios division feels like it's on a downward trajectory.

TL: Aeorstar’s ridiculous acrobatic offense continues, as his pairing with Pindar showed off some tremendous timing and Pindar’s amazing ability as a base. Then the damn Luchasaurus comes in and, well, it all comes screeching to a halt. I still don’t get how it’s a lucha company and a martinete isn’t illegal, and then they one up it with the Drago re-turn, which had him literally tagging in on Team Reptile while tagging with Aerostar and Fenix. Again, I’m looking for logic and getting nowhere, which seems like I need to just curb that during these reviews.

ER: Mundo backstage segment felt like Mundo, Mandel and Taya were all filmed separately, came off really weird. Mandel would react to things wrong, they kept jumping back and forth from comedy to serious, it all came off odd. But, it was all saved by "There's no time for pants."

TL: To be fair, I don’t like wearing pants when I train either, so I’m squarely on Team Mundo here.

3. Boyle Heights Street Fight: Mil Muertes vs. Prince Puma

ER: These two have had plenty of big time fights, last in a Grave Consequences match. Striker built this as Puma perhaps finally beating Muertes (even though he already beat him earlier this season), but this kind of just continues LU's weird habit of not building to anything very well this season. If Striker is building up "local hero" Puma's final chance at besting Muertes, it's weird that it came as an unannounced match on a show where the big deal was clearly the resolution of Mack/Mundo. They had over a year to make the proper vignettes or do the proper build, this whole match was taped 13 months prior! And the best they can do is have fat zombie Vampiro glower at him occasionally. But whatever, the match was fun because you know these two match up nicely. Puma takes a rough bump through the chairs and gets speared through a table he set up (aint' that always the case?) and does plenty of amusing things, my favorite being hanging onto the stair handrail at its peak, with Muertes trying to throw him over. Puma has some nice comebacks, with a flat out awesome kick jumping off Dario's office wall. Puma always takes Muertes' big powerslams nice, and Muertes took enough damage to make a loss believable, taking a stiff 630 and then taking a freaking brick to the face to finish. I have no interest in where the Vampiro storyline can go, but in a vacuum this match was plenty fun.

TL: One of my favorite pairings in LU hook up again and my expectations are high, especially after Grave Consequences. Scariest part of the first few minutes was when they cut to Vampiro looking at the monitor enjoying the violence and you couldn’t see where his hands were. There is an issue here with doing a similar match to the opener because you have more crowd brawling and it’s getting into ECW territory with going to the well once too many times, but Puma using everything from signs to a shoe for a weapon was top notch. Cueto almost casually telling them to get out of his office was one of the better spots of the match. Striker is very much doing too much trying to get the story over here, and here I thought nobody was yelling in his ear about story points. Don’t know if Puma’s gonna be able to do the flipping Van Terminator on WWE TV as long as Shane-O-Mac is still on screen. Finish was interesting with Puma getting the 630, eating a stone shot, then taking the Vampiro brick and crushing Mil for the win. Just their chemistry alone makes it a good match, but at the same time, there probably wasn’t much else they could do for an encore after Grave Consequences. Obviously going to set up Puma getting another shot at Mundo/Rey because there really isn’t anyone else who could win the Cueto Cup (Plus the Rey title shot at the Cup finals), but at the same time, probably the best matchup that could be done at Ultima Lucha III.



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Thursday, June 15, 2017

Lucha Underground Season 3 Episode 15: En La Sombras

1. Killshot vs. Dante Fox vs. Mariposa vs. Jeremiah Crane

ER: I thought this was one of the more successful 4 way scrambles of the season. Participants don't always matter in these matches, as there's enough down time for everybody that people can be hidden. But layout is important and you need a traffic director, and people need to hit their stuff. It got a little kick-y and way too sound effects-y at one point (there's a spot down the home stretch where everybody is hitting a variety of kicks, back to back, and all of them have the exact same sound effect, so you were just getting that Slim Jim snap every two seconds), but this was a fun 10 minutes. Fox hit a bunch of rabid succession dives, and then Crane levels him with his awesome low tope. We get a ridiculous chair tower spot that leads to Mariposa throwing nasty chair shots at everyone, throwing chairs around like Necro Butcher, hitting guys at annoying angles with unfolded chairs, really fun bit of violence. Crane felt like he was running things in there, hanging back for the flip offense and always there to cut things off and keep it flowing. The postscript of the match was terrible though, with our final image being the continuing feud of Killshot/Fox, and Killshot hitting his finisher. And I still have zero clue what his finisher is supposed to be. He always just stomps both feet next to his opponent's head. Is it supposed to look like he's stomping the guy's face? Is it a bad bombs away? Whatever it is, no part of him makes any sort of contact with his opponent. Is the fear of another human being leaping high into the sky and *almost* landing on your face enough to paralyze one man long enough to get a 3 count? I'd probably be pretty rattled if I were lying around somewhere, and somebody almost landed on my face. So that's probably it. We'll go with that.

MD: I wanted to name this review: "Night of a Thousand Kicks." that's what this match felt like. In general, though, and this might just be me not watching a lot of super indy multimans and tags, I was really impressed by the complexity of the layout of this. There was a ton for these guys to keep track of and they did so pretty smoothly. I'm tempted to agree with Eric and give the credit for that to Crane. On the other hand, when you have this many strikes and kicks, none of them end up meaning anything. As much as I loved the image of the chairs (and it makes sense because Callihan's the world's best Ambrose), the unprotected shot meant nothing and was totally unnecessary. If you're going to do a spot like that, make it matter. On the other hand, Mariposa's shoulder blocks felt like they did matter because it was such a striking image to have the female in the match be the bully. They completely made it work and believable. Striker insinuating on commentary that insane Mariposa was somehow inspired, like the rest of America, by Sexy Star was pretty maddening though. And sure, if the shoulder blocks resonated, her tossing chairs around the ring absolutely did. She was a total bruiser in this match, even getting to finish the Tower of doom spot. I liked how frustrated she was in not winning the match too. Reactions like that are important in putting over the stakes. Killshot was generally as annoying as usual. Fox wasn't much better (and they're both all the worse for being neither heels nor faces; just being there). And yes, absolutely, on a show that's so heavily produced, why would they so clearly show us Killshot whiffing on his post-match finisher?

ER: There's not much worse than slo mo training in a dark gym to soft flamenco guitar plucking, and then finding a spider in your locker. Yucky! Luckily, that spider was in the locker of the woman who has overcome more than any woman in history.

MD: The Sexy Star thing wasn't so bad in 2x speed. She was hitting that bag super fast.


2. Kobra Moon vs. Drago

ER: Not a lot of LU matches end in a DQ, so I guess that makes this one noteworthy? According to Vampiro, Kobra Moon might not have any bones or cartilage, which I suppose could explain some of the clumsiness. I thought Drago looked quite good in the limited time we got; he did this single leg while shrugging her other leg over his body with his shoulder that looked smooth in a nice understated way. The smaller lizard person looks like Dirk Benedict at the end of Sssssss ("Don't say it, hiss it!").

MD: I'm thinking they should probably have done this over a span of three weeks right? Lizard guy one could debut after a normal Drago squash and look good in the debut. The next week, the trios champs could run him off. Then Lizard Kane could show up on week 3? That would have made everyone look stronger. This way Lizard Kane (did they have to give him both the Chokeslam AND the Tombstone?) was the only one who really got over. Drago's trip-based offense looked better than Angelico's trip based offense later in the night at least. His Dominator was brutal. I can't believe they let Ron Simmons do that week in and week out in 1996.

ER: Sexy Star has shown more anger and passion over this spider in her locker than she showed following her six months as a kidnapped slave. I'm starting to think Sexy Star is really bad at this.

MD: Hey, they made the Iron Fist hallway fight look good. Is this the first real time we've heard Mariposa speak? That's a mistake.

3. Jack Evans vs. PJ Black vs. Son of Havoc vs. Angelico

ER: This was quite the worst of stupid multiman spots, with tons of really bad set ups for moves that didn't look great anyway. PJ Black standing bent at the waist holding Angelico's waistband for an eternity, just to set up Havoc doing a double stomp, was a microcosm of this match. But it did peak with a legitimately holy shit spot with Angelico superplexing Jack Evans off the buckles to the floor. He clearly went over PJ/Havoc and took a full superplex all the way to the floor. Crazy, insane spot, taken by an insane man. But it was fine, as Jack was back in the ring for the finish no less than 15 seconds later. Very little to love about this match.

MD: In theory, I kind of liked that they switched up the way the match was laid out compared to the other multimans and made it a bit more of a 2 vs 2 thing. In practice, they didn't lean hard enough into it. Angelico/Havoc/Ivelisse had a real connection with the crowd. They could have done more with that. I don't think this was necessary worse than some of the other Bulls matches with the contrived set ups, but when you add in the lack of (narrative) impact everything had, it was pretty grating. I liked when they dumped Havoc out of the ring and that did set up an Angelico vs the World bit, but the bit itself was so bad that it didn't really earn any lasting goodwill. And hey, Angelico looks like a putz after they set up his return.

ER: This, right here, was a bad episode of professional wrestling.

MD: I'd call it more middling. That first multiman, while not necessarily a good professional wrestling match, was at least an impressive spectacle.

ER: I will compromise and say, "This, right here, was not a good episode of professional wrestling."


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Thursday, July 07, 2016

Lucha Underground Season 2 Episode 17: Crime & Punishment

ER: Having Dario mug in the ring during the Aztec medallion intros was a somewhat out of character but funny bit. "Aerostar!! Welcome back to Earth!" Making fun of the interchangeability of the Disciples of Death, egging on Chavo and Cage may have been the best ("Fight it out guys, fight it out!!"). Again, Dario out there riffing and cracking jokes was a little off considering the punishment he and his brother went through last week in Graver Consequences, but the guy is funny and charismatic so it's fun to see him riff.

1. Argenis vs. Daga vs. Kobra Moon vs. Mascarita Sagrada

ER: This was perfectly acceptable, if flawed. Everybody did something I liked and something I disliked. Daga hit a nice shoulderblock and a really great rolling flip dive to the floor, but then took ages to set up a silly double submission on Argenis and Moon. Moon would throw a great dropkick but then do some clunky stalling (though these may be character directives that I just don't understand yet or aren't being communicated well), Sagrada took a fine beating, with him getting tossed and spun neck first into the bottom rope, and Argenis doing a Backlund lift into a driver on him looked sick. So yeah, some fun stuff, some problems. This was definitely a 4 way match between some low level guys.

2. Marty the Moth Martinez vs. Killshot

ER: Martinez deserves a lot of credit in this one for taking some of Killshot's stupid indy offense and making his other stuff look good. But damn there are so many guys in this fed I'd rather see get 8-10 minute singles matches than Killshot. The way he boings and sproings out of offense makes stuff that should look really devastating just look fun and painless. He takes a nasty release German at one point, and an exploder into the buckles, and then just kinda bops around like he's covered in Flubber. He takes a curbstomp and makes it look like Boogaloo Shrimp perfecting a new breakin' move. Moth takes a ridiculous DVD on the apron and some sort of neck duck driver from Killshot, leans into all of his thigh slaps, takes a great spill off the apron after a sidekick, really tries to make Killshot look good. But they seem ointent on the Killshot hardsell this season, so I'm sure we'll get more of these "feature" matches with his athletic brand of bumbling.

3. Gift of the Gods: Texano vs. Joey Ryan vs. The Mack vs. Sinestro de la Muerte vs. Aerostar vs. Sexy Star vs. Chavo Guerrero

ER: These Gift of the Gods matches haven't been very good so far. 7 guys is too many. In a trios match you have a few guys waiting on the apron because they're not tagged in. In this match you have guys lying around selling or waiting on the floor because...they just don't want to win, I guess? Mack looked good in this, Aerostar had some cool moments (I mean, throw Aerostar in a match and he's going to do a couple cool things). His falling meteorite is a crazy awesome flying move, and I liked when he was rope running at one point he found a way to kick an opponent on the floor with both feet, while not missing a beat running. That's impressive. This whole match existed to set up the Cage/Chavo angle, which feels like a weirdly roundabout way to just get to a cage/Chavo match that was set up out of nowhere anyway. Let's take several weeks to have qualifying matches for entry into this match, to set up a match between a guy who was and a guy who wasn't supposed to be in this match.

ER: The Pentagon/Vampiro sadomasochism stuff is getting weirder and weirder. I like where it will eventually wind up, with an even more violent Pentagon emerging to take on Dario and Matanza. But this went on a bit too long.

ER: Pretty nothing show this week.  If you had to skip one, this wouldn't be a bad pick.

PAS: WILL DO!!!
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Tuesday, April 12, 2016

Lucha Underground Season 2 Episode 11: Bird of War

ER: So is the buddy cop Reyes/Ryan stuff supposed to be funny? There's some midi-sax music playing and they're cracking jokes about Matanza - a guy who Reyes witnessed eat a man's face - being released from the cage. I don't get it.

PAS: The cop stuff is some of the dumbest stuff they are doing in this fed (and they are doing some dumb stuff), it doesn't even make any internal sense and the acting in it is Spice channel bad. Joey Ryan is a pox on our house

1. Ivelisse vs. Kobra Moon

ER: I actually really liked this one. I guess it shouldn't be shocking as Ivelisse has been great so far, but Moon had a flat debut against Sexy Star and - even though any work against Sexy Star should immediately be discounted - it sucked some interest out of this one for me. And then they both went out and had a snug, nicely laid out match. Any pensiveness Moon showed against Star was gone here, as both ladies laid into each other with chops and knees. A lot of the rollups were held really tightly and there were moments were this felt like a mean fight, which I wasn't expecting. Ivelisse sold Moon's rope chokes well, and I kinda liked the hissing as a taunt to your opponent.

PAS: Yeah, Eric is riding alone on this one. I thought some of submission stuff was cool, and Ivelisse always works stiff, but Kobra Moon still looked in deep waters. Felt like a pretty decent WWE women's match from four years ago, and pretty good Alicia Fox v. Brie Bella level stuff doesn't excite me.


ER: Killshot video managed to be good and bad at the same time. Somehow they managed to incorporate his bad indy offense into him killing ISIS, and for that I love them. But who the hell was he shooting at? He fired upwards of 35 shots at ludicrous trick shot angles, practically doing an Annie Oakley Old West Shooting Show, but he would fire 5 shots in one direction, and then a terrorist from the same direction would burst onto the screen. For a guy who misses half his spots it would make sense for him to also have terrible aim. But having Killshot take down terrorists is a step up from showing somebody fighting three unnamed luchadors in a nighttime alley.

PAS: This was OK I guess, the gunshot special effect were really corny though and Killshot is a suck ass dude to get this sort of effort for.

2. Cortez Castro, Mr. Cisco & Joey Ryan vs. Marty the Moth Martinez, Mariposa & The Mack

ER: Fun trios match, if you ignore that Mack was mostly fine teaming with his "mortal enemies" who kidnapped and potentially sexually abused his best lil buddy. Mack was somewhat miffed when he didn't get the hot tag, but apparently didn't think to refuse to tag with the people who assaulted and held his friend captive. Does he just really want the trios belts that badly? Does he respect the spirit of competition so much that he will literally set aside ANY difference? Oh, that's right, we had a cooperative chop exchange between he and Marty. That should make his raped friend feel a little better.  So all of that shit is the stupidest shit possible, but right in the middle of it we got a great little Cisco/Mack roll around, a fun Cisco/Mariposa segment, Ryan dropkicking Moth right in the chin, and I like the way Moth and Mariposa work together. This was also the most work Cisco has gotten in a match and he looked killer. Post match Star at least shows some fire going after Mariposa, while Mack cheers her on. But why the fuck didn't Mack just do this himself if he wanted it for her so bad? Instead he just held the tag rope wanting the hot tag like a doof the whole match.

PAS:  Cisco is badass, and I loved his section with the Mack, but I totally agree with Eric that the Mack/Star v. Martinez siblings stuff in-ring is totally divorced from the back stage vignettes. In ring we have a testy little feud with some tag partners who don't get along. In the back Sexy Star is recovering from being stuck in a pit by Jame Gumb. It feels like they decided to film all the sexual assault stuff after the fact and retconned it in. It is pretty amazing that a show which can do so many thing so right, can do other stuff so blindingly wrong.

ER: Okay, Mysterio, Horus and Puma is a killer trios team. I am 100% on board for that.

3. Fenix vs. Matanza

ER: This was awesome. This is a monster I can get behind. Fenix just kept coming at Matanza and damn does Cobb just have some ridiculous strength. The way he caught Fenix on the tope was just unreal. He caught him with his side facing the ring! This was not a guy getting caught on a plancha, this was a man pulling a speeding bullet out of the air. all of his catches where he then adjusts mid catch, or AFTER the catch, before a slam are just incredible. That extra step to show you that Matanza has you now, and he can bend twist turn whatever while holding your corpse. He caught Fenix in mid air a few times, always pausing, turning his body in a new direction to show he was the one completely in control, and then just crushing him through the mat. This whole thing was just killer. And then full on tecnico Mil Muertes bursts into frame and I immediately get excited for a Clash of Famous Monsters. Killer stuff here.

PAS: Yeah this was the best Matanza has looked. Fenix got some offense in, but still got eaten alive. I also loved how Matanza was smashing his head against the floor like he was trying to open up a coconut, really violent looking and very different then you would normally see in a wrestling match. Muertes v. Matanza should be totally awesome. I love Clash of Titans matches and this has some of the coolest build up a match like that has ever had.

ER: Overall a good episode with the wrestling all delivering, which is all I can really ask for.


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Sunday, March 06, 2016

Lucha Underground Season 2 Episode 6: Gift of the Gods Ladder Match

1. Sexy Star vs. Kobra Moon

ER: After a few weeks of poor shows the words I definitely want to hear to start off a show are "She is...Sexy....STARRRRRRR". Good grief. But at least it's against another person her size and not against Cage or something. Although I have no fucking clue who they think they're talking about when describing Sexy Star; not only is she amongst the biggest female role models in history, inspiring, courageous, incredible, but she's also the spirit of Selena and Celia Cruz all rolled into one! What the fuck does any of that mean!? And really for what this was, it was totally fine. It was kept short enough that Star didn't botch anything, Moon looked better here than in her debut, and they did some cool stuff. I really liked Moon's clubs to the back, and especially liked that nasty forearm across Star's throat during a pinfall.

PAS: I think Eric is being overly generous here. I thought both ladies looked tentative and untrained. Sexy Star has been wrestling forever, so there is no excuse for her looking like a fitness model John Laurenetis tried to fuck being thrown in a four minute Smackdown match. Poor Willie Mack getting dragged down into this. It is a shame to go from The Mack to Captain Save a Ho.

ER: We get a trio of fun vignettes, and I'm loving the Famous B late night ads. "After dominating the world of underground fighting..." and "Pick Up Yo Fone!" No clue where it's going but it's entertaining me so far. Rey as Pai Mei is amusing so far, although I'd rather just see Rey in the ring. But then we end on Cuerno in his dope tejano hunting lodge and I am totally sold. This was all good stuff.

PAS: Cuerno in the hunting lounge was super cool, I am loving the focus on him this year. Rey doing the training montages isn't as cool as Konan doing them last year, and a pretty big waste of Rey

2. Prince Puma vs. Pentagon Jr.

ER: Not as good as their match a couple weeks ago, but with a better bullshit finish than that match. Both guys went into epic death selling we're in a war mode about 3 minutes in. Maybe Pentagon's overhand chops always got sound sweetening, but now that the fed sweetens the sound on 80% of the strikes it kind of lessens the impact of Pentagon's. I liked the drop down code red, Pentagon's dropkick to a handstanding Puma always looks devastating (both guys do this spot better than anyone), thought Puma looked silly doing his little do-si-do into a soccer kick after his senton. If this match was made to put over Muertes, however, he looked like a total murderer post match. I loved him disposing of Pentagon and then wheeling around and just brushing off Puma with a straight right hand. But jeez twice now in a couple weeks that they've run what should be a marquee built-to match and just rushed through it before ending it with the focus on something else. I get that it's building up a 3 way (even though a singles match with any combination of the three guys is infinitely more appealing), but a Puma vs. Pentagon match should ALWAYS be a big deal, not just tossed off twice with minimal prior warning.

PAS: Yeah I loved Muertes coming down and wrecking fools, but this felt like less of a match and more of a time kill for a run in. It felt even more like a Nitro main event then their last match. I really want to see what these guys can do against each other in an actual match. It felt last season that this was the big showdown they were building towards, and it is a shame it is being blown off in such a lam-o fashion.

3. Gift of the Gods Ladder Match: Fenix vs. King Cuerno

ER: We've talked about how creative seems kind of bankrupt so far this season, and you can look no further than the episode titles we've been getting lately. I mean at this rate the episodes are going to just be called "Some Guys Will Try to Win Wrestling Matches". This was a match that had several cool spots, but didn't really add up to anything substantial. It also appeared to be approximately 70% climbing. Climbing ladders, climbing barriers, climbing up things at ringside, climbing to get into position for moves that may or may not happen. There was ample set up time throughout this match, and it was often kind of lazily done and misguided, or spent setting up things to not get used. Nothing really seemed to hurt either guy, and we got weird little spots like both men climbing and then just hanging onto the belt rack, and then falling. The way they set it up made them both look like they were climbing for the sole purpose of hanging from monkey bars. The rana through the table looked nice, a couple spills on the floor looked good, Cuerno getting tossed into a ladder only to leap up and hit a clothesline off it was cool, dug Fenix' full extension superkicks, I liked some of the crowd brawling...but it felt like they were always just walking or recovering or climbing, without it adding up.

PAS: This did feel more like a construction challenge at a team building retreat then an actual wrestling match. Lots of setting up of contraptions to get everyone over the wall. It was weird how much was set up and never used. The big bumps were pretty big, but the match itself felt weirdly small. Have no idea what the booking point of Cuerno winning the Gift of the Gods, never cashing it in, and then just losing it again. Felt like a bit of a time kill. Fenix's big dive was bonkers though.

ER: Not a total miss this week, but still not approaching anything close to what we got in the first episode. I'm confident things will pick up eventually, but as I don't check spoilers for this fed I have no clue WHEN exactly that pick up might come.

PAS: I am getting less confident every week.


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Friday, February 12, 2016

Lucha Underground Season 2 Episode 3: The Hunt is On...

1. Bengala vs. Kobra Moon

ER: Wow, I'm so happy I managed to not get this spoiled as I had no clue Kobra Moon was Thunder Rosa! I've had the privilege of doing commentary on a few of her matches, as she works all over the Bay Area - including several shows for Phoenix Pro Wrestling. She's barely been wrestling a year, so it's a little crazy to see her get a TV gig. She's really nice, and clearly worked hard over this last year. So color me surprised when I recognized her through her mask and weird....snake tongue waggling? The snake stuff does not really work for me, but I'll give her credit for committing to things. If the producers told her to act like a snake, but a snake that is also a professional wrestler, I'd be hard-pressed to think of someone who did a better job of acting like a snake within a pro wrestling ring. Now, the match wasn't very good. I'm not excited for even more intergender stuff in this fed. I'm confident it won't be as bad as the Sexy Star stuff, but intergender matches have such a lower ceiling (and lower floor). As far as I know Rosa hasn't worked intergender matches up here, so it would be odd that they'd specifically bring in someone who has just a year under their belt, and then make them work a format they haven't worked before. She's very small, and I just can't see how that will work out. Match was fairly short, with Kobra hitting a rana to the floor, hitting a nice axe kick, doing a nice job of getting the knees up late on a Bengala splash. But Ricky Marvin isn't a very big guy and was much bigger than her here, already stretching the plausibility of things. So I'm left with a weird neutral feeling, as I could not be happier for her to be getting this opportunity, but I'm also unsure where she fits into the fed.

PAS: Ricky Marvin is also a bigger guy then he was last season, he is starting to get Super Astroish, but I am not sure if his agility has caught up to him yet. I liked the snake stuff in theory, although that choke sleeper looked barely applied. This didn't do much for me, and Kobra Moon looked a little too fragile to be a threat, Aja Kong I could buy kicking guys asses, not so sure about this girl who looked 105 pounds.

ER: I'll level with you, I didn't really understand that Aerostar vignette.

PAS: I think he is a time traveling space alien? Vignettes have gotten stupider and stupider this season, they feel like they are leaning into the Chikara which is not where I want to see this show go. Is there a dumber idea in wrestling history then Big Ryck getting murdered in the comic book? By the Disciples of Death who are Rough and Ready in the actual wrestling portion of the show, but apparently savage murder machines in the canon comic book. I like this show mostly but wrestling being taken over by Comic Con dorks is the fucking worst. I don't need a pro-wrestling extended universe.

2. Jack Evans vs. Drago

ER: So Jack Evans is probably a crazy person. I can't understand how his body lands the way it does sometimes. He finds a funny and dangerous tone here, doing silly stuff like bumping a slap with a 720, doing a funny cartwheel handspring eye gouge, hit little peekaboo through his legs on the top rope that leads to him getting superkicked...but then also just getting dumped on his head a couple times in a fast neck snapping way, or taking a rough DDT while draped over the top tope. I don't need him to go full Kenny Omega or anything, and some stuff eeks a little close, but he seems to know how to read the room. Drago had some fun moments and I really liked him in the opening minute bullying Evans into the ropes a bunch. But spotlight was kind of on Evans here.

PAS: I thought this was a little Shawn Michaels vs. Hoganish with Evans taking these outlandish over the top bumps for simple things. I like the idea of Jack calling himself the Dragonslayer but he is at his best taking big beatings, I wish they were setting up Jack vs. Muertes or Matanza where those spinning bumps would make more sense.

ER: Texano had kind of a misfire of a last season, but this package did a nice job of making his time here seem a bit more impactful. And just when I was rolling my eyes at yet another vignette of masked guys jumping a LU guy and getting beaten down, Texano starts breaking everything in sight with his bullrope and it gets awesome. Breaking beer bottles out of hands, breaking tables in half, busting chairs that get thrown at him. El Texano, The Whipmaster is infinitely more interesting than a feud with Daivari.

PAS: I did like the bullrope stuff, but man are the vignettes repetitive and lazy this year, does everyone live in some alternative universe where people in lucha masks are attacking people in the streets? Is this Frank Miller's Gotham?

3. Last Luchador Standing: Fenix vs. King Cuerno

ER: This fed knows how to doll up for their gimmick matches and this was no different. After a little early clumsiness with Cuerno balancing on the top rope while Fenix balanced on the opposing top rope things picked up big with Cuerno taking a big bump over the top, only to move out of the way as Fenix tope'd into nothing. Yes please. They use their sound sweetening for good as Fenix gets tossed into the ringpost and they do this great *ping* sound that sent shock waves down my hands thinking about fouling a pitch off in just the wrong way. Cuerno continues the beating by tossing Fenix through a row of chairs. Cuerno got to be a real badass throughout this, as Fenix got to hit some flashy dives (including his awesome springboard tornillo from the middle rope), but Cuerno would always cut him off, eventually knocking him to the floor and hitting the sick arrow tope past the ringpost. They shot the dive with the overhead camera and it was easily the best use of that camera angle yet. Everything builds to what we think is going to be a lunatic bump off of Dario's office, from a fed who loves doing lunatic bumps off of Dario's office. And unexpectedly, instead, Cuerno just takes a BRUTAL bump through a set up table, falling off the ladder. This may have been the nastiest bump in LU's history. And it's all because, for some reason, Cuerno HELD ONTO THE LADDER while falling!! So you just had this slow fallback as the physics of a man on a ladder shifted, and started to tilt back, and then he just kept hanging on tight to that ladder, all the way through the table and through the floor. You don't need sound sweetening to enhance the THUMP his body made. Cuerno was like Wile E. Coyote using an Acme drill to weaken a cliff side, and as he drills all the way through the cliff and begins falling to his sure death, he's still there in the sky, falling while drilling. That was Cuerno, just holding onto that ladder as he fell to his sure death. Insane.

PAS: This was a step below some of the absolute peak LU gimmick matches, but this was very good. Fenix is a guy I haven't loved outside of LU, but he is great in these kind of over the top brawls. He gets such great height on his dives and takes huge bumps. He also has a sense of dramatic timing which really comes in play in these kind of big main events. Cuerno was great too that final bump was truly nuts and truly unexpected.

ER: I'm predicting Phil will hate the cop show sketch to end things, and I definitely do think they need to pick a side, with Reyes playing things too serious (badly) and Ryan playing things too hammy (badly), but I foolishly like the angle of a vice squad put together specifically to take down madman Dario Cueto. Plus we got confirmation that B-Boy actually DID have his face eaten off.

PAS: This was super dumb, if you are going to do some convoluted crime story at least have it make internal sense. Reyes says "I should have brought him in when his brother killed Bael" and there is no answer and the whole story get exposed,  and then you have Joey Ryan playing a cop in a gay porn and that means we have to watch Joey Ryan. Cuerno was fun as a hammy evil promoter early in this feds run, but the more they have tried to build some sort of B movie horror film the dumber it has gotten. This is Hellraiser 6 level writing and completely divorced from what makes this fed good.


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**And we liked the Last Luchador Standing match enough to include it on our 2015 MOTY List (You see, it was recorded in November 2015, even though it aired 3 months later)**


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