FOUND FOOTAGE FRIDAY: OMNI 7/3/83

7/3/83 Full Show 

Bill Irwin vs. Brett Wayne

ER: Great combo of guys, a weird size mismatch but not a wrestling mismatch. We're both big Irwin and Sawyer fans, two more men who've had their career cases bolstered by all this Omni footage. Irwin is this great wrestling weird guy, a stumblier Terry Gordy, big and lunging and always off balance a bit. He's a stomping lummox and Brett Wayne is a strong underdog who connects with the Omni setting. He's great at fighting to his feet, he's great at taking offense with real expression. The way he rag dolls on a big backbreaker is just one good example of his emotive selling. Irwin mostly in control, but that off balance gait makes him feel less in control. 

Irwin builds to his biggest offense, and it's all powerful stuff. His gutwrench and vertical suplexes land heavy, and I loved his Bruiser Brody kneedrop. Fresh off an All Japan tour where he worked exclusively as Brody's partner, he does a pitch perfect impression of Brody's bodyslam and King Kong kneedrop, only Irwin's kneedrop looked better. Everyone in the Omni and my house thought Irwin was missing that kneedrop when he was setting it up. It hits square and Brett already has his foot on the ropes. I wish it had missed so it didn't lead directly to Brett fighting back with babyface fire. 

The count out finish is excellent, as Irwin tosses Sawyer to the floor and Brett gets his whole leg hung up over the guardrail as he lands. The guardrail isn't even especially close to the ring, a whole commentary table and more away, he just flew. He takes another, different kind of great tumble over the rail when Irwin boots him from the ring. Great rail work. Buzz Sawyer saunters out as this is happening, and there's a great bit where he keeps half heartedly talking Bill out of jumping off the top buckle to the floor as Brett is struggling.

MD: Loved this. Great way to get the crowd going. There was a massive size difference but they milked it as far as they could. In the first exchange on the mat, Wayne scrambling free got a massive pop because they made a big deal out of it. Then Irwin complained about him being greased up. The first few minutes were bit after bit, Irwin missing an elbow or running into a boot or getting twisted around while trying to control the arm. Celebratory babyface shine stuff made better by the connection Wayne had with the crowd, the size difference, Irwin's willingness to stooge. 

He did take over and there weren't really hope spots or comebacks so much as big kickouts from Wayne, starting with a kickout at one. Because it started the sequence, it had a completely different effect than a late match nearfall that was about fighting spirit. It was a bit of defiance before Irwin had beaten him down as much. At one point he managed a kick out and the place went nuts and Irwin slapped the mat in frustration. Then Irwin hit the knee but Wayne's leg bounced up on the rope for a great visual. He got mad at that (instead of making faces) and tossed Wayne out. Wayne took this amazing pinball bump over the rail, and then when knocked off the apron as he was trying to come back went sailing over it again. Great stuff leading to a countout. Post match, Irwin menaced him like he'd come off over the top but officials stopped him. He still got over for the sheer threat of it given his size.

Bob Sweetan vs. Killer Brooks 

ER: I love Killer Brooks' look as a wrestler so much, a total dirtbag who looked like Ricky Jay without success. He has the look of a man to be looked at with scorn, and the Omni all feels that scorn. This is a man to avoid as he's buying his beer and Twinkies at the store. Brooks is so hateable on sight that the Omni is excited to see noted huge piece of shit Bob Sweetan punch the hell out of him. That's what this is, a big fat piece of shit punching a scum bag around the ring while the scum bag begs off and takes funny bumps. Killer Brooks is one of the more underwhelming wrestlers I've come across in our 20 years of 80s projects, but he's great at getting punched around by Sweetan. Sweetan had a great bit where he kept badly hiding headlock punches from ref Nick Patrick, but the crowd disliked Brooks so much that they kept siding with Sweetan and saying he did nothing wrong. The time limit draw finish is unsatisfying, but Brooks' scramble at the finish was the coolest part of the match. Mr. Piledriver finally sets up the piledriver, and Brooks, panicking, floats his leg out to the ropes while dragging Sweetan down with a double leg. It looked more spry and agile than anything I've ever seen Killer Brooks do, so it's possible it was all an accident. 

MD: I'd say this overachieved. Same idea as the first match in some ways but this time Sweetan was more the aggressor and able to push Brooks around. Fans went up for every punch, especially the ones in a headlock that he hid from the ref. Brooks took over with a cheapshot or two and kept laying in punches (big stomp ones). Sweetan hulked up with a "Now you've done it" look that got a pop fromt he crowd and Brooks did take a draping face first bump into the corner. They kept brawling to the bell for a time limit draw. Pretty minimalist overall but you can't really say it didn't work. I do think Brooks needed something extra during his control whether it was working the crowd more or a little more variety in offense, but the fans still went up big for Sweetan's comeback. I would have rather a double DQ for too much punching than the draw maybe too.

Tully Blanchard vs. Pez Whatley

MD: Ah, this is why they didn't do the DQ in the previous match. After cutting Pez off on a comeback, Tully got DQed here for pounding on him in the corner. Then they had a post match of Tully running into a bunch of punches before he got the upper hand and more or less kept his heat on the way out in the Tully way. Match itself was a lot of fun. First few seconds were beautiful as Tully turned a handshake into a slap and then ran like hell. Of course he got clowned shortly thereafter. Then he reached over the ref to hit a cheapshot in the corner and was off to the races. What a jerk. What a pro. Little odd to see him in this setting but he was going to get over as a heel anywhere and he clearly did here.  

ER: I could have watched Tully go after Pez for a half hour without getting restless. Tully is both for this, born to move as despicably as possible. I think I love this match structure, where Tully beats Whatley's ass by being an underhanded but tough asshole for 5 minutes then Pez beats Tully's ass for a couple minutes after the DQ. Tully's movement should be studied. It's dickhead Baryshnikov, strutting around on his tiptoes after cheapshots and violent outbursts. That short elbow he shoots into Pistol's jaw, before violently pulling him by his trunks through the ropes to the floor? That's what I want. I want that trunk pull, that sudden jolt to the waist that sends Whatley's head and shoulders folding to the apron. The crowd hates Tully's shit pants smug strut after. Pistol's punches after the bell were hot fire, and Tully takes two big spills for him. He drops like lead from a missed middle buckle elbow, and flies fast through the ropes to the concrete to put over Pistol's atomic drop. If I could be guaranteed a Tully match like this on every indy card, I'd ho home happy with wrestling every time. 

Ronnie Garvin vs. Iron Sheik

MD: Weird card so far. This was a deal where the title was on the line for the first ten minutes only but it didn't matter because it was a non-match. Garvin choked him with the towel and kept choking him with the towel and the ref just threw it out. He said he was going to give everyone a July 4th gift and get Sheik out of the country and then really didn't do that. They did leave the fans with a happy memory as Garvin atomic dropped Ellering into Sheik on the floor. Still, this had to feel a bit like a rip off. And actually, that's maybe not the best idea in general, because Ellering was in the next match and it was built at least a little about deferring punishment to him. This card is kind of all over the place even if specific bits are okay in isolation.

ER: This was hot, smoking hot. Garvin is an animal and Sheik is great at being overwhelmed by this haircut of a man. The timing and scrap of it all was tremendous. It was a great Paul Ellering match, a guy we don't always praise and a guy who doesn't always add to a match. Here he's excellent dressing, a bee buzzing on the periphery and getting tangled into and out of the action in ways that felt like a guy actually breaking up and exacerbating a fight. When Nick Patrick would get tangled with them it would get even better! Sheik gets hung by the neck from the top rope that Garvin used to distract and snare like a gi. These Omni DQs/count outs/messes are great at building to a climactic explosion of someone out of the ring, and this one was perfectly executed: Sheik's flying into Ellering with a running kneelift, Garvin sidestepping at the last moment. Timed to the T, with nobody looking around for a cue. The sense of space from all used to max effect. 

Stan Hansen/Tommy Rich/Ole Anderson vs. The Road Warriors/Paul Ellering

MD: I feel for Arn that he wasn't in the Tommy Rich role after they made a big deal about him not going with Ellering in the build. This is Ole in his Bill Watts standing tall phase and he is over but it's still weird. Also weird is Hansen and Tommy Rich as tag team specialists and, of course, like always, the Roadies eating so, so much offense in the extended shine. It goes on forever. Very fun to see Hansen cutting off the ring by blocking so Rich can come in and keep the assault on. He also hit a great monstrous belly to back out of a headlock.

Pretty interesting heat. They kept cycling in the babyfaces (first Hansen) and controlling with headlocks using hairpulls or their own corner to keep control. There'd be tags but it'd be right back into the headlock. They opened things up on Rich which let Ellering tag in quickly over and over to get cheapshots. Eventually he kicked his way out of the corner (to great applause) and made a hot tag to Ole. Ole ended up back in the headlock and they really worked it this time. I thought maybe they took the fans a bit too low because there'd already been a hot tag but when Ole started to fight back, the fans did get up for the comeback. He went through the legs which was a wild image and got a hot tag to Hansen. Everything fell apart after that and I think the Roadies were DQed for tossing Rich over the top. Man Mountain Darsow (who just debuted on TV) came in to take care of business and the fans did like that. Too many inconclusive finishes on this one, I think.

ER: Hansen vs. The Road Warriors is so sick. He looks so damn tough against them, he looks towering. The way he knocks them both back with chops, the way he moves both with no issue, it's marvelous. Hawk and Animal are not yet Hawk and Animal. They are not will imposers yet, they are machines without full ideas of what to do. They're 10-20 matches into a 2,000 match career, a feeling that has never been felt before. Think of being 10 of 2,000 into anything. Your 10th ever beer, or your 10th ever burger; how those would be if Stan Hansen was punching your neck while you had it. Hawk has this nasty side headlock grab that looks like some real ranked bouncer Dalton sweep up the eyeballs toughness, and Hansen just lifts him cold and quick with a back suplex, like it was instinct and the easiest way to shake off a 275 pound man. 

The Road Warriors are infants with fuzzy Monchhichi haircuts. Hawk, always gifted with finding surprising ways to take offense, apparently had that skill from go. I watched it back a few times when he ran through a Wildfire punch to his stomach, stumbling through it and out of it with a leg buckling forward roll.  The Road Warriors long headlock control wasn't my favorite. Animal did the greater portion of it and his control was too stifling with too little advancement; too slow burn without catching fire, too smothering to lead to rewarding babyface selling, minimal intrigue given to Tommy and Ole in the headlocks. The headlock on Rich was enough, we didn't need one on Ole. Rich finally tagging out to Ole was one of the best parts of the match, Ole great at fighting messily through Hawk and Animal and Ellering for good measure. 

The real treat is after the match, as I've never seen any part of Barry Darsow's one month long Man Mountain Darsow era. His rarest persona. He's dressed like a 5 year old who likes big truck, and big hulking baby who's a Real Man's Man. Unrestrained Darsow is a sight. It's the biggest I've seen him outside any modern YouTube thumbnails. Had I been there and been even slightly more interested than the depressed man in white slacks in the front row, I would have thought Darsow was a future wrecking ball no different than Hansen and the Road Warriors. I wouldn't have known about how much he would call people goofballs.  

Buzz Sawyer vs. Scott Casey

MD: Casey had come in from Southwest and built this with a promo that he heard Sawyer was the toughest guy around so he wanted to fight him. Meanwhile, there had been some Rich and Sawyer animosity (re)building with a great backstage fight at the last Omni show. This was definitely good. Buzz got outwrestled to start, and he made it very engaging, constantly moving and flailing, teasing clean breaks and handshakes, taking his signature bump sideways out of the ring after a punch during rope running. 

He took over with a spinning heelbutt in the ropes after all those clean breaks and his cutoffs were all wild bits of body motion as he got his feet up. Finishing stretch had him missing a huge top rope knee drop and then holding the ropes after a roll up reversal. I could have used a little more on the comeback but this was really just to set the stage for Rich making the save for Casey and the two of them having a wild bloody brawl around ringside. Better to save the energy and fans' attention for that. 

Larry Zbyszko vs. Mr. Wrestling II

MD: We've not covered the weekly TV the vault has been posting leading up to this show. Those have had less great matches and more were great episodes where stories ran throughout the show.  

They had built to the last match by having this great show long story with Larry saying Wrestling II didn't deserve a shot followed by II winning a handicap match (pinning one person after another with his new pal Rick Rood coming out to ensure Larry didn't interfere), and then Larry's crony Killer Brooks failing to pin two guys, the second being Rood, after II came out to help him. 

That led to the last Omni show having Wrestling II get a pinfall on Larry that was counted by by Rood while the ref was down and stealing the belt. On the next show, they instituted a new rule where in case of a draw, a ref could decide a winner, and it was all about setting up Killer Brooks and guest commentator Wrestling I as co-refs for the upcoming match.

The following week, Larry finally got Geigel to force Wrestling II to give the belt back to him, but that led to a $25,000 vs Mask challenge where Larry brought in Tully and Wrestling II had Pez as his partner. They'd do a three round elimination tag. The reason for this was clearly because GCW TV wasn't set up to do one long match over the whole show. That defeated part of the purpose of the TV to cut promos for the weekly shows around the horn. By doing it in rounds, they could be a bit like Portland who would do promos between falls of 2/3 falls matches. The elimination gimmick was more to put Wrestling II's mask more at risk and build the story of the match. 

That was fun (even if it was weird to see Tully as anyone's second banana) and led to Wrestling II beating the odds.

Which brings us to this long, long title match. Like I noted, it was a great build and we were lucky to see it. 

The premise here is that with the two refs, Larry wants to wrestle clean if Wrestling II dares. Wrestling II does dare ("Mr. Zbyzsko, my name is Mr. Wrestling"). Brooks is all cleaned up which is funny to see. 

So they work this match for far longer than you'd expect with Larry getting one-upped hold after hold, exchange after exchange, and throwing a fit on the outside (with the fans counting along) only to come back in and get shown up again. That meant headlocks that II was able to keep despite Larry's best efforts, times where it looked like Larry might have gotten an advantage with something legitimately slick only to immediately lose it, and rope running where he did A-B and C right only to get clowned on D. At one point, when Larry was disengaging to try to figure out what to do, II grabbed the house mic and said "I thought you wanted to wrestle" to a big pop. We've seen this a thousand times, but I've never seen it taken to this level where they just run it for so, so long building up pressure for him to totally lose it. And the best part was that they had the fans the whole way between the build, the premise, and the execution (including and especially Larry's selling of the humiliation).

Finally, Larry got frustrated enough to throw a punch. Brooks (playing it even) was quick to admonish him and II hit a kneelift, only for Larry to go sailing out. Then the humiliation continued. Roll-ups, rope running, monkey flips. There'd be little glimpses of Larry losing it, not breaking clean in the corner, escalating to a body slam (only to get slammed immediately himself), but he kept going back to the wrestling, even having just a bit of luck with a full nelson. It wasn't enough and II escaped. That's when Larry lost it and kicked II through the ropes onto the table on a rope break. This was a whole 30 minutes into the match, which is a massive testament to the two of them, being able to keep the ball in the air that long.

Larry opened things up from there, peppering in punches on headlocks. Both I and Brooks (surprisingly) admonished him. He'd keep throwing punches, with Brooks doing most of the admonishing. Because he was giving him grief, there was only so much I could do, even as Larry came back for more punches. Eventually though, that little bit of delay, that little bit of distance let II start to duck and weave and mount a huge comeback.

Things get a little muddled for the finish unfortunately. We get a bit of out of the comeback clipping leading to a double down. II then does get the kneelift but Larry's hand is in the ropes and Brooks starts giving II grief. That causes I to get in his face and Brooks to toss I out. I eventually comes back and takes Brooks (who had been more or less doing his job) out of the match. II has a clear advantage down the stretch but can't quite put Larry away before the bell. As it rang, he had him in a great sleeper, with Larry's legs far, far out causing a big visual lean. I awarded the match to II (given the new rule that refs could do that on a draw) but said the belt should stay with Larry. The clipping hurts it a bit and it'd almost be better with only one ref (though it did help cover some of Larry's punching, maybe), but overall, I thought this was a fairly big accomplishment to pull off.

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Matches from AJPW 11/25/90: WALKING TALL DORY~! NO RESPECT DYNAMITE~! KIDNEY PUNISHING HANSEN/KAWADA~!

The Funks vs. Dynamite Kid/Johnny Smith AJPW 11/25/90

ER:  A pretty amazing match that I had never seen, with four standout performances. It's so hard hitting, and these new All Japan Classics episodes showcase that in the best way. The sound on these episodes is incredible, and it puts you right in the middle of this high impact style. I can't imagine what it was like sitting front row for such a physical style as All Japan - let alone be a participant in it! -  but this video makes it feel like I was there 35 years ago. It's one of five Tag League matches smack in the middle of the show, and they kill each other and treat it like a match with actual stakes. It's an awesome Dory match and more evidence that Dynamite Kid's Winter 1990 is him at one of his highest levels. Dory comes off like the tougher, harder hitting Funk, an actual Cool Dory match. The match peaks with the Bulldogs working over Terry's Not As Damaged 46 year old legs in ways that contributed to Terry's Old Knees while Terry scrambles in half a dozen of the greatest attempts at making a hot tag, a face in peril to his big brother's ass kicking tough guy. 

Johnny Smith is at his absolute beefiest; Dynamite is at his most bitter and dangerous, a little guy starting the most violent fights at the bar. It's a great team. Dynamite looks angry the entire match, on the apron, in the ring, and treats Terry like an old man to be put to pasture. Terry works lighter to come off as vulnerable to loss as possible, and is at perhaps his most sexy. Sexy Terry working as Pretty Ricky. Ponytail Terry with his little mustache and the best body of his career. I love Hot Ponytail Terry in his Body Glove tights, and here's Dory in his blue trunks working stiffer than anyone in the match,  maybe anyone on the show (Eric's Note: Kawada and Hansen kick each other so hard in the kidneys later on the card that Dory Funk would have died so let's leave it to saying he worked stiffer than anyone in this match). It adds up to a middle of the card tag match that was worked as a small show main event. 

Listen to how hard they're all smacking each other! Dory's contact on his collar and elbow tie-ups with Johnny were the sound of bodies used to taking hits. When Dory is in against Dynamite, he hits him with uppercuts that are so hard that I don't think Kid had to sell his limbs all going numb. He looked shocked that Dory was hitting him so hard. He tees off hard on Smith and really looks like a mat expert going after Smith's knee and ankle. Everyone worked this super honestly, but Dory's work was the most honest and well executed of all. And here's Dynamite, the by far smallest man in the match and the guy who I'd least want to confront about anything. He goes after Terry with no respect. Maybe my favorite spot in the match, is when Terry is hitting Johnny with headbutt after headbutt before they both go down. Johnny goes down, Terry spirals down after, and the second Terry hits the mat Dynamite's eyes go wide and he scrambles up to the top rope to hit a headbutt to Terry's stomach. He pulls it off so hastily, making it look like a snap impulse, and his knees land full weight one inch from Terry's face. It looked so dangerous and was only one of the things that made this match play so tough. Dynamite is so geared up when he's in against Terry, that they even do a spot where Dynamite presses Terry off him on a kickout and Terry flies several feet from it, like Dynamite was Yokozuna. Dynamite kills Terry with clotheslines to the back of the head, throws him to the floor with a back body drop, and - most incredibly - drags him into a standing stretch muffler that blew me away. Dynamite's body had to be in constant agony and as he locked in the muffler and stood to his feet, clasping his hands while the much larger Terry was hanging upside down in a headstand, his pain was as palpable as any I've seen.  

The Bulldogs working over Terry's knee was some excellent third act cutting off the ring. Dynamite wanted that knee all match, and when he got it he was like a dog with a chew toy. He was slamming Terry's calf over his knee and it looked like one of the most violent pieces of work I've seen. Terry's selling was incredible, crawling and leaping towards Dory while Smith and Dynamite had to keep tackling and blocking. There were some nearfalls that got the big crowd to bite, like one of the most well-used and well-executed rolling inside cradles. Dory pulled the cradle and Smith rolled it over and the movement was so good that Yokohama bought in. Terry's win over Smith was so well done, as Dynamite had totally drained Terry and suddenly one of the biggest stars in wrestling history looked like he could be beaten by Johnny Smith. He has to resort to scrambling on top of Smith during a pinfall exchange and just weigh his body down. The Bulldogs looked like a tough vital team against two legends, and The Funks looked legitimately at the top of their abilities. 

Andre the Giant/Giant Baba vs. The Land of Giants AJPW 11/25/90

ER: Phil and I wrote about this match 7 years ago and I don't think I appreciated it enough then. It seems funny to say that I didn't appreciate an Old Andre match enough, as I think every single review of any Old Andre match I've ever written is me appreciating and analyzing every step he takes. I love the 1990 Tag League old broken but still proud Giants, and we should all be thankful that we got to see them against the worst Fake Road Warriors team ever assembled in a respected promotion. I cannot and will not say it is a great match, because it is not. The Land of Giants - Skywalker Nitron especially, specifically - are total cornballs. Nitron is the goofiest of all, almost surely the goofiest wrestler All Japan used in 1990. You're off the hook Richard Charland and David Sammartino. But part of what makes the match great, is that Andre and Baba know that these two are cornballs, and the gift that brings us is a very active Andre match. 

Andre is old but not nearly as old as he'd look in 1992. He was in the ring a lot against both cornballs and had a bunch of great ideas and ways to attack both of them. He looked really strong, even if Nitron sold some of his offense with the goofy acting only seen from people reading stories to small children in libraries. Andre looked like he had a lot of fun beating these two goofs up. He had two different cantaloupe fist punches, one while holding Nitron in a headlock and the other just thrown to the face and followed up with a NOAH worthy headbutt. He grabbed Masters in a knuckle lock and made it look like he was crushing his hand. The camera had a zoom in on Andre interlacing his fingers with Butch and his fingers were so big they looked like they were forcing Masters' fingers to break apart. It looks like something that would and did drop Masters to a knee. The best part is when he broke the knuckle lock by rearing back and punching Masters in the fingers. 

This match has Andre the fucking Giant holding Rob Zombie's Michael Myers in a bearhug. Freddy vs. Jason is my least favorite Nightmare on Elm Street movie and my least favorite Friday the 13th movie, but Andre the Giant vs. Michael Myers is a horror movie showdown we needed to see and I would have paid money to. There's no way I would have gone into that movie and gotten Andre keeping his bearhug locked in by pulling on The Shape's rattail. Moustapha Akkad wouldn't have had the guts. 

Stan Hansen/Danny Spivey vs. Toshiaki Kawada/Mitsuharu Misawa AJPW 11/25/90

ER: The Funks vs. New Bulldogs was a hard hitting match. Every open hand on chest and back landed with a loud crack and Dory Funk threw in a last hurrah before his 50s with a great Walking Tall badass role. It's great. But then two matches later Kawada and Hansen took such righteous anger out of each other's kidneys that it made me think *I* was going to piss blood. This is some of the toughest wrestling you'll ever see. Hansen is in full force of nature mode and he hits Kawada like a kid in training camp. Every chair, every shoulder, every godforsaken kick, was felt thoroughly. Hansen is such a force of nature, that you're not expecting Kawada to take such a force so head on. Kawada kicks Hansen back even harder and cracks baseball bat shots off the old cowboy's torso. Kawada makes such wicked contact that Hansen's pancreas selling looks like the man is learning how to sell a bruised pancreas in real time. Hansen is the best Train Running Off the Rails impacter in wrestling and it was amazing to see Kawada throw his whole body at a moving train. The finish is incredible and features one of the greatest low bridges I've ever seen. Misawa flies over the top rope with such speed that I jumped in the same way I do in the movies when a car gets unexpectedly T-boned. Spivey's team with Hansen took his timing to a really high level. Misawa is there one second and gone the next and as he's flying one direction, Hansen runs the other and knocks Kawada into the sky with a western lariat. Later, Doc and Gordy try to hit harder clotheslines on Taue in the main event and make fine cases. Later still, Jumbo and Taue outdo them all with their clotheslines to Gordy. It's show-long clothesline oneupmanship I can support. And then Jumbo gives Gordy another. 

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1990 Andre Remains Undefeated, 1990 Hansen is Unmoved, 1990 Funk is Ponytail Terry

Andre the Giant/Terry Funk/Dory Funk Jr. vs. Stan Hansen/Joel Deaton/Dan Spivey AJPW 12/1/90 - EPIC

ER: I love this. It's 8 minutes long and every second is great. It has numerous peaks from all six men, efficiently mixing and maximizing several different pairings, playing perfectly into the natural hierarchy. You know this is going to end with Joel Deaton being pinned by somebody, you know the second Deaton is left in the ring that we are close to the end, but those facts do not diminish a single exchange because often what should happen happens for a reason. The match has everything, including my three favorite pro wrestlers all doing the things that make them my three favorite wrestlers. This is the only time my three favorite pro wrestlers ever were in a match together. Do not even try counting some West Texas battle royal from 50 years ago, this is the only match Andre, Funk, and Hansen ever had. Isn't that something?  

Terry Funk vs. Stan Hansen never had an exchange that wasn't worth watching, and here it's Ponytail Terry, taking a swing at Hansen on the apron, a swing to connect. I don't think Hansen sees it coming but his blurred vision instincts knew he had to duck quick and low with the speed Ponytail Terry was approaching him. Hansen chops Terry so hard, Terry punches Hansen like he does, and it's great...

but it's nothing like the smile on Andre's face as Hansen is backed into their corner and he tags in. I don't know if Andre entered a ring quicker over the rest of his life, and Hansen hops backward up onto the bottom buckle like a trapped animal. His instincts are correct. When he tries to lock up, Andre grabs pro wrestling's ultimate ass kicker by the fucking throat and backs him up all the way across the ring, dropping him with one punch to the chest while Mustache Joel Deaton runs for his life down the apron. Everyone got their own individual Andre Jump Scare spot. 

Andre uses his size and Sasquatch grabbing ability to herd all three big men into a corner and hold them there so the Funks can use him as a battering ram. Hansen is trapped below the pile and shows he's one of the best wounded animals in wrestling, only here it's his pride that's wounded and makes him advance on Andre with punches and chops. Hansen is an egotistical Great White Shark in a way that nobody else has ever captured. Hansen famously never stops advancing in his matches, and when Andre stops him dead in his tracks by grabbing his fucking throat, I wonder how many times it will take him to learn that this is the one man you cannot keep advancing on. Andre does not back Hansen up by the throat, this time, he punches him in the nose and tags out. 

Sometimes Dory looks at his opponent with those Sydney Sweeney eyes and upends them with two hard uppercuts, and it's the best 1990s Dory.

Andre looks like he's having the time of his life on the apron. Apron work is just one other thing that old Andre excelled at. When Dory reverses a whip and sends Deaton his way, Deaton hits the damn brakes while Andre nods and grins at him like crazed Willem Dafoe. This match sets up the idea of Joel Deaton getting whipped into Andre more than once and pays it off incredibly for the finish. Hansen and his goons all hit Dory hard on the floor far away from where Andre can reasonably get over to them, which is a great old Andre spot where heels take advantage of how there's no chance Andre will be able to even reach them. But they always eventually wind up too close. Spivey tries to get all cute back in the ring and rolls Dory up with an abdominal stretch cradle, but Andre reaches over the ropes and breaks up the pin by grabbing Spivey's entire mullet in his fist and not letting go! Spivey looks like a man actually considering whether he's fine with having his hair ripped out to escape. Andre is the best apron threat in wrestling history. 

You can see the moment Hansen knows he's not defeating Andre and you can see the moment one second later when it stops bothering him. Hansen had a pattern all match of using Joel Deaton as a projectile in his war against Andre. Deaton was used in two rocket launchers, and 1.5 of them connected. When Hansen got tired of getting throttled, he decided in one instant to whip Deaton as hard as he could in Andre's direction. Joel Deaton is a great pro wrestler and even though we all knew the entire match was building to his demise, he never once wrestles like he knows. When Hansen whips him toward Andre and starts heading for the showers before even seeing whether Deaton got caught or not, Deaton really thinks he is hitting a big time clothesline on Andre. He is not a man forced into running toward his own death, he isn't a guy running towards someone just to take a spot, he is a man doing his best to connect with that clothesline. 

It doesn't connect, Andre kills him. Hansen won't stick around to see the pin.  

You want to tell me old Andre's elbowdrop sucks? You're wrong. In this very match you can see an example of the most perfect elbow every dropped, that of Stan Hansen. There has never been a better elbowdrop than Hansen's. His form is perfect, his landings always directly on target, his impact incredible and something I wouldn't survive. You cannot throw a better elbowdrop. Andre's elbowdrop is ugly. Not just by comparison, it's just ugly. The form is terrible. He looks like an old dog who is taking five steps just to lie down. Legs down first, then the left arm to the elbow, then the right, slow roll to his side, off center on his favorite fur covered rug. But when the camera cuts in close and you see Andre lying across Deaton's chest, there is no way Deaton could get a shoulder up if his life depended on it. When old Andre pinned someone, it was a shoot. Andre lying on top of you cannot be kicked out of, so the delivery of Andre falling on top of you does not matter. Hansen's elbowdrop is about maximum targeted impact. Andre's is about finding the best way to get laterally onto his opponent. Impact is not created in form when you are Andre's size, it just Is.  

COMPLETE AND ACCURATE ANDRE THE GIANT

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FOUND FOOTAGE FRIDAY: OMNI 2/26/84

 

Jesse Barr vs. Pez Whatley

ER: A match made completely worthwhile by the finish. Up until the finishing stretch I was prepared to write "Yep this sure is some undercard wrestling. Well Barr did work his chin lock fairly effectively and I appreciate that" and be done with it. But then we go on an excellent one minute run to finish on a perfect high note: Barr throws Whatley through the ropes to the floor, fast, and the cameras pan to Whatley and what appears to be a ringside security guard facing away from the ring while eating popcorn and literally reading a fucking magazine. When Whatley tries to get back in the ring he's greeted by Barr's legitimately great kneelift - the best piece of offense all match - and I love how Whatley's reaction is to get obliterated by the kneelift and desperately try to roll back to the floor before being dragged back in. All of that is made worth it by Barr taking one of the greatest banana peel bumps I've seen when Whatley sweeps his leg. Barr made it look like he had no idea the football was being pulled. 

MD: Nice way to get acclimated to 1984 here. The ref, especially does a great job in both checking Barr before the match (showing Barr that if he doesn't agree, then he'll declare Pez the winner) and then catching the hairpull on the top wristlock cutoffs the second or third time Barr does it. Barr was maybe 25 here and you had to wonder what his ceiling might have been at this point. He looked good, high energy especially on a kneelift catching Pez on the way in and then bumping big for Pez's finishing stuff, and Pez, of course, knew exactly what he was doing and played to the crowd well between it. Ok opening match but I'm glad they didn't decide it needed to be a time limit draw. 

TKG: Fuck all that, this ruled and was ridiculously hot for an opener. Pez Whatley backdrop driver may be the most impressive suplex on a show with great throws. Just holds Barr up in impressive lift before perfectly dropping him. Whatley just looks like a hoss throughout this dominating on mat. Why wasn’t Whatley in the Varsity Club? Why didn’t he get a Triple Crown title challenge. You watch that suplex and shocking that it wasn’t finisher. Barr actually hits a desperation knee to get straight back on offense. And really the high knee lift is Barr’s only move. Was Barr doing a loaded knee pad gimmick? Barr refuses to let ref Scrappy McGowan check his kneepads before the match until Scrappy threatens him with DQ, all of his offense and comebacks and signature bump built around knee lift. Hits a knee lift for control and then slaps on a chinlock. Whatley wins with this high neck yolk move (instead of a bulldog from behind he yolks opponent down from the front), Whatley goes for it several times and never quite gets it till the win. First time, I thought it was a crossbody that he got too much height with, second time I thought it was a Mil style in ring tope and when he finally hits it clean, clear that is what he was going for and match is over. The moves based match structure had a real first round of a early 2000’s Super Eight feel to it, and you could totally see Ketner booking a Billy Fives, Scoot Andrews, Barr, Pez 4 way dance for the next month.

The Spoiler vs. Johnny Rich

ER: Spoiler standing on the top rope looks like a magic trick. It looks like an illusion. He's standing so still, like he's not even standing on anything at all. Don Jardine is a man the same age as me and twice my size, yet he stands effortlessly on the ropes with the grace of El Hijo del Santo. Watch him. Watch his entire body. At one point he appears to be only standing on one leg, right leg on one set of ropes, left leg on another, until one of the legs lifts...and the rest of his body doesn't move. His entire body is still, no part of him looks like he is countering weight to maintain balance. He looks like he is standing on solid ground. He looks incredible. You've never seen anyone walk the ropes like Spoiler. Fenix, Komander, Elix Skipper, any name, none are comparable to what Spoiler does. 

I could go on and on about the unreality of his rope work - if this wasn't a full card and only this match, I would write several paragraphs on him standing on the ropes - but maybe the greatest thing about it is how he uses his rope work for heel heat. I don't think there has ever been a heel who has used "look how well I balance on the top rope" as the basis for his heel heat, but there is Spoiler on the top rope, striking and holding a pose like a large buccaneer, showing off his balance to a bunch of husbands and wives out on a Sunday. The Spoiler draws heat from standing still on a very high point, and the crowd starts coming alive for Rich's comeback because of it. Johnny Rich does this thing where his punches keep looking better the deeper into the match we go, and it makes the crowd louder and more responsive. And then my man hits the blade for Spoiler's claw, and we get this incredible, violent, wrenched in claw that Spoiler made look like he was breaking Rich's entire upper torso. The shot of Rich, still standing, body being contorted while held in the claw, blood covering his face quick, made me go from "Man Spoiler matches always deliver" to "oh wow they did something special in just 6 minutes". 

MD: Great look at the Spoiler and I'm glad people will see him that are unaware. Hot start to this as he clubbers right away in the corner only for Rich to fire back. But then the size advantage takes over as he just hefts him up and then tosses him into the corner. The rope walk elbow drop is just super striking because he does it with ease and without hesitation and he followed it up by draping Rich in the ropes and kicking the ropes and they made it look great and painful. Someone needs to steal that. 

Rich eventually rolls in (and to the other side of the ring so he can recover) and fires back with jabs, but pressing Spoiler into the corner is no good. He'll just grab your head and use it to steady himself as he walks the ropes. From there, he started utilizing the claw, getting Rich out of the ring with it and then immediately catching him on the way back in, leaving him a bloody mess. I'm happy people will get introduced to Spoiler this way (And Rich was perfectly fine in his role with fiery but futile comebacks).

TKG: The Spoiler putting Rich in a cat’s cradle is the greatest yo-yo trick ever done with a wrestling ring..

Ted Dibiase vs. Mr. R

ER: This was not designed to be a great match, but instead was worked like the first six minutes of a bigger match, all basic Mr. R side headlocks floated over into Dibiase pin attempts and then back again. I had never seen any of the Mr. R angle and my favorite part of this was Rich avoiding Jesse Barr and Spoiler's attacks as he rolled out of the ring and jumped the rail. The fans were into this and all they did was headlock shoulderblock stuff, showed how over the full angle was. 

MD: We had maybe 25 seconds of this previously. I imagine those might have been the 25 seconds we needed but we have so little actual Mr. R footage, this is still interesting. They worked the first five minutes of a very conventional match with the usual chain wrestling. Dibiase was very into it and this was fine, but it's interesting just how normal and conventional it was. After about five minutes, Dibiase calls his cronies in and the heels all try to get Mr. R's mask, but he darts out of the ring like a trickster and hops the rail and wins by DQ. The energy at the end with the angle bit was very good but this was really all just a tease.

TKG: There was some cool fighting for top wristlock stuff here but this reminded me of a lot of the Mid South Dibiase technical fussbudgeting with no direction killing time before the loaded glove finish. I kind of need to feel like you are stealing a win for me to get mad at a DQ.

Les Thornton vs. Tommy Rogers

ER: My God Les Thornton is a little tank. Tommy Rogers had a real credible side headlock and he really cranked it in a few times, especially on one spot where Thornton tried to push off, but just when I thought I knew what snug was, Thornton made me say "whoa" aloud (in the bathroom at work where I was watching this) at how violent his reversal to headscissors was. Thornton pulled off the headscissor with such speed and force, in a way I haven't seen. Rogers couldn't have stopped this if he wanted to. Made me want to see a Thornton/Finlay match. Every headscissor looked great and Rogers sold his frustration in them so well. His hair pulls are done with such a quick snap that it made me smile when Rogers finally broke a headscissors with a knee straight to the head. Rogers has a clean sunset flip that looks like an actual pin, and Thornton really thunderclaps his ears with his legs to break. Love the bounce Rogers got on Thornton's butterfly suplex and how both men made every headlock exchange look like actual struggle and applied pressure. The finish had a couple things that didn't quite work. Thornton has a way of taking Rogers dropkicks that makes Tommy look like a chump, and Rogers tried a back suplex that saw him dropping Thornton's full weight onto himself. Thornton's pin reversal win looked like it didn't even have half the leverage of any of the headlock/headscissor exchanges. Basically I loved the first 13 a lot more than the last 2.   

MD: I thought this was going to be wrestled straight but as it went on Thorton leaned heel. There was a lot of ref interaction early. I liked him the first match but he got a little too involved here turning holds over, kicking the arms off when they were holding the ropes, etc. They did some really neat things with headscissors right after pins including a transition into a takeover from Rogers i'm not sure I'd ever seen.

The match opens up midway as Thorton starts to introduce heel tactics. It leads to a really big extended comeback by Rogers where Thorton keeps trying to cut him off but can't. That played more to Rogers' strengths so it was better than if this was just wrestled clean. The fans were pretty into it by the end and when Thornton holds onto the tights to win, they are very much not happy with him.

TKG: Meltzer wrote about Malenko v Benoit from Road Wild that it would be a great match with a different audience and I was like “fuck that, they would have worked it differently for different crowd”,,,the best part of that match is how hostile the work was making the crowd. I was joking with Phil the other day about a Les Thorton v Scott Mcghee match which the WWF had booked to kill heat and send crowd to concessions. I assume Vince Sr was getting percentage of concessions and built into his card formula were these log technical draws that were intended to get a hostile crowd response and send people to concession stands and my memory of Thorton v Mcghee was that crowd started “boring” chants from moment they came to ring but actually never left their seats for concessions, transfixed; just couldn’t take eyes of one guy has a headlock which other guy counters with a leg scissors and just got more and more hostile about the idea that it was holding their attention. Match had a bunch of same elements while that one was built around egging on hostility while this is built around the pops for the face and encouraging the cheers. We don’t build matches to kill crowds anymore and kind of miss it as an art….but this was really cool too

Wahoo McDaniel vs. Nikolai Volkoff

MD: Basically a slugfest. Volkoff had big over the top punches. Wahoo had straight shots and chops. Volkoff did do this one shot to the face that I thought was amazing and Wahoo, as he was firing back, did a chop where he just ran through Volkoff in a way that I hadn't seen him do too many times before. Volkoff did get one bearhug in there but it was functional and led to a wild clap escape by Wahoo. He hit both of his backbreaker variations (including the press slam one). Things got wild on the floor with Wahoo dodging a chairshot. This was one of those matches where it was just interesting to see how they made the noise for their strikes. Not stomps so much as recoil jumps, things like that. Eventually the ref, who had been all over the show as noted, tried to get in the way of a Wahoo choke and both guys ultimately tossed him for the no contest. Wahoo tried a bunch of elbowdrops to crush Volkoff but he kept on rolling to safety.

TKG: Crap, was Nikolai Volkoff always this bad? It is Wahoo, you can hit him. He won’t cry. Volkoff’s lift before backbreaker is always impressive but c’mon. Wahoo keeps on leaning into strikes and Volkoff pulls them even more. Aways a joy to see Wahoo tee off on someone but Volkoff is a shitty guy for him to be stuck against.

ER: Damn, was Nikolai Volkoff always this good? Do I like Nikolai Volkoff now? Wahoo is Wahoo and the chops (more than one to the face!) are great and his comeback had the heaviest shots of the match, but has Volkoff been good this whole time and I just haven't sought out any of it? Is the Don Muraco Eastern Championship Wrestling Title match good? Is the '94 WWF run good? Volkoff was a big weird guy here and I loved the way he kept awkwardly kicking at Wahoo's forehead like he was Bad Taue. Imagine how great Volkoff could have been had he just been Bad Taue? He throws his kicks up with the same awkwardness of Taue, but with normal body proportions so his legs aren't as long. He does two great backbreakers to Wahoo. Well, one good back backbreaker and one incredible backbreaker. Volkoff is one of our few wrestlers to make gear a part of his backbreaker. It must be so humiliating to not only have your back broken, but to have your singlet or trunks stretched and wedged and rearranged during the lift. Volkoff kept lifting higher and Wahoo's singlet kept stretching further, an insult I think worse than mussing someone's hair. He bumped bigger than I expected when Wahoo started firing back, getting upended by a running chop and pinballing all the way across the ring for Wahoo's excellent shoulder shrug to the jaw. 

Jake Roberts vs. Ron Garvin

MD: Just an exceptional match. With these GCW Omnis, we see the Jake Roberts that we were always promised, the master of psychology, of bringing the crowds up and down and using every dirty trick. He was good later on but was too much a babyface and without the room to breathe like he had here. His ribs were taped coming in so we had his reach and leverage and dirty tricks and Ellering at ringside against the promise that at some point in the match, Garvin would get free and use the hands of stone to punch those ribs. 

They built it and built it and built it, Roberts leaning hard on the ref disallowing punches and utilizing every hairpull, tights pull, piece of rope to choke, distraction from Ellering, everything he can manage. At one point he goads Garvin into the corner (with Garvin having the advantage) only for Ellering to pull the leg out. So much of the match is just a seated armbar, but they work it so well, with hope spots like Garvin pulling Roberts' shirt up to expose the taped ribs, just that. It's so good. He gets him once but Roberts' escapes, and then when he finally gets him and ties him up in the ropes, laying in shot after shot, the place comes unglued. The ref takes a great bump and while Garvin's able to stop Ellering from using the chair, Jake blindsides him and DDTs him on the chair. When the ref comes too he hits a couple of insult to injury elbow drops for the pin, keeping the program going and getting huge heat. Just a brilliant match, maybe even a perfect one for what they were trying to accomplish.

TKG: I think of Garvin as a guy who is relentless on offense, and less of as a guy who is really great at selling but he is…he isn’t bumping for strikes but somehow by standing tall and selling the toughness of not going down, he makes the strikes look far more legit. Also I am so used to TOUGH manager Paul Ellering, that exasperated throwing hands in the air freaking out Ellering was super fun.

ER: 1984 t-shirt Jake is such an amazing era of Jake Roberts. He never looked more like the most dangerous Molly Hatchet roadie. The load out guy who everyone fears but everyone knows is the guy who can get you crank...and beyond. He did not look like a wrestler or move like a wrestler and it's what made him one of the most compelling wrestlers. He did not throw his uppercut like a wrestler. When he throws five downward punches at Garvin's face when Garvin has him by the leg, he punches like a carny. When the throws cross chops at Garvin's throat they're...maybe the best non-punch strike you've seen. Jake is wearing a t-shirt to cover up his taped ribs, and this might be the only Garvin match I've seen based around him throwing body shots. Once he starts teeing off on Jake's ribs, even tying him up in the ropes like Andre, the crows loses their mind. The whole thing is incredible. Roberts stifles Garvin for so long and escapes at the right moments, and it all burns down as Roberts is finally getting his ribs battered while he sells it like he's doing kabuki, bent at the waist on tip toes. The finish is dynamite, with Garvin being spiked right on Ellering's chair with a DDT. You can't fake the way Garvin takes this DDT, that's a man going vertebrae first onto that chair. The best past is Jake doesn't pin him after that. He rouses the ref by shoving him the way a big brother would shove his little brother after calling him numb nuts, then when the ref is watching he falls onto Garvin with an elbowdrop. He grabs at his ribs on impact, totally worth it. Had this been on one of the DVDVR 80s sets, we would have called it one of the greatest Jake matches. Now we can. 

The Road Warriors vs. Stan Hansen/King Kong Bundy

PAS: In my mind this is an insane Kaiju battle, a tag version of Andre vs. Hansen. It wasn't that, much more of a traditional tag match, but it was delightful. I am going to leave Eric and Matt to rhapsodize about the initial lock up, but man was that beautiful stuff. We don't have a ton of Road Warriors stooging and bumping, and they do a great job of that early, I can't remember seeing Stan Hansen working face in peril, and we get a nice spoonful at once, I have definitely not seen hot tag Bundy, and hot tag Bundy was incredible. I wanted a bit more of an explosion at the end, it felt like this was a match setting up a huge gimmick blowoff, which never happened, but man what a treat.

MD: Finish or no finish, the fans got their money's worth on this one. It was, in some ways, very weird in the entire history of wrestling. GCW Roadies were still raw, were very willing to stooge and show ass in a way that they really wouldn't later. Bundy was a big towering babyface, and Hansen played face-in-peril. We don't have a ton of performances like this out of him. 

When they did finally take over on him, it was by focusing on the arm, the old Hansen standard, but his hope spots were great and rousing, just big booming attempts to fire back, with the fans getting behind him, before he'd get cut off. There were only so many teams in the world that could believably keep him down like this but the Road Warriors in 84 were on that list and they really made it work. Bundy coming in at the end was like a wrecking ball and yes, this broke down with Ellering grabbing Bundy's leg and all four guys firing off until the ref called it. It's great that the Road Warriors became what they did, but I do wonder what I would have looked like if they stayed on this road instead. Just a tremendous Hansen performance overall and a new piece of a puzzle that was already feeling complete. 

TKG: This was way more a standard tag than I was picturing but a pretty great standard tag. I assume most of this will be covered by everyone else but I really loved all the Hansen face in peril trying to make sure that he still was getting blood flow to his fingers while the Road Warriors working over his arm.

Ric Flair vs. Brad Armstrong

MD: This went how you'd expect it to go except for that maybe it stayed clean (though with Flair still strutting when he did well) for quite a while. I loved Brad's energy on his hope spots/comebacks. The bit where he climbs the bottom rope to start firing back on Flair was great and I want to see Daniel Garcia implement that as part of his act ASAP. Just super, balanced pro wrestling with a little something for everyone who might be watching in 1984. More of this please, and soon.

ER: I want to know more about the Donald Sutherland/Kurt Vonnegut led couple who left at the same time with the cool younger leather jacket couple. Leather jacket guy had his hand on his girl's inner thigh and they had just found out this Brad Armstrong headlock had hit the 10 minute mark. They made a look before both getting up at the exact same time and I didn't see a single solitary second the rest of the show where it looked like they even know they were there. A bunch of kids take their place and the 13 year old on the end is wearing a sleeveless Union Jack and has his arms crossed the entire time. He's the fucking coolest 13 year old I have ever seen at a wrestling show. 

TKG: The weird thing about the “traditional long slow build Flair main event” is how fucking fast paced it is. Like this is the fastest paced match on show. In theory Flair is trying to slow it down but it never slows and just builds. I also really like the way it feels like 2/3 falls match where it has parts, an initial technical fall section, a brawling section and a quick running exchange section that feel like they build off each other. At one point Flair does his first set of chops during the technical section to regain control and those are completely different than the type of chops he does during the actual brawling section.

TKG: Referee Scrappy McGowan worked this entire show solo and it is a real impressive performance. HE is neither a tough ref who is completely in control nor a ref in over his head struggling to assert himself but instead just a perfect medium. Guy who gets manipulated by heels but also stops heels from cheating. Of the Georgia refs, he isn’t one that I think of as getting talked up but he was really great throughout this show.

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Found Footage Friday: HANSEN~! IDOL~! WAGNER SR~!? HANSEN~! IDOL~!

Dr. Wagner (Sr.) vs Manuel Soto 1979

MD: This was apparently the first round of a $100,000 tournament with the finals in Madison Square Garden but I'm not going to look it up and try to figure it out if that was actually something that happened. This is a rare look at Wagner, especially in a full match. It goes around ten minutes and was worked "gentlemanly" and primarily on the mat with a few escalations and those were usually armdrags and the sort. The wrestling was god though. Wagner wrestled interestingly in the first few minutes, very reactive, very defensive, a lot of counter-wrestling. Soto came off as a bit more fiery and won most of the escalations with Wagner basing for him. They never stayed in anything for long, keeping things moving even though it was mostly on the mat. I wouldn't say we learned a ton about Wagner here but you got the sense he could back it up with skill in a straight match like this. I have no reason, after seeing this, to question anyone who might say that he was great certainly. I just maybe don't have a ton of proof to verify a sort of greatness that would take him over the top either.

Austin Idol vs. Stan Hansen Memphis 9/12/83

MD: A wild almost nine minutes here. Stan ambushes Idol as he's coming over the guardrail and they never look back. He opens him up immediately and once they make it back into the ring and the bell rings,  targets the wound like only he could. There's a bit early into this where he puts his heel right on the bloody forehead and scrapes and it's the simplest thing in the world but given how he does it, it's downright grisly. Beautiful pro wrestling. Idol fires back after a couple of minutes of it and the crowd goes nuts. Hansen is extremely giving here, bouncing over the ring, flailing limbs, letting himself get slammed. It builds to Stan tied up in the ropes, Idol pushing the ref away, and then Stan kicking Idol into the ref in one of the better ref bumps you'll see, and Hansen taking advantage, hitting a lariat in the ropes and winning by DQ. Hart's a great little nuisance throughout as Hansen has absolutely no regard for him. 

ER: The face of the DVDVR 80s Memphis 100 has changed over the last couple weeks. We wrote about a tag a few weeks back that could have placed in the top 10, and now we have two more Stan Hansen Memphis matches. Stan Hansen worked one month in Memphis in 1983, in between All Japan tours. He showed up and kicked Austin Idol's ass over five matches, three of which were included in and underrated on the DVDVR set. Now we have the other two. All five of Stan Hansen's matches in Memphis, during that one month of 1983 directly after he won the PWF title from Baba, are now all viewable on YouTube and you could watch all four singles matches and the tag in under an hour. That's a thing we can all now do, any time. 

Stan Hansen blew into Memphis one day and beat Tom Prichard's ass for the TV title and then hung around for a month before blowing out. Imagine how large Hansen must have looked inside the WLMT studio. If you were a fan of Tom Prichard in 1983, it must have felt terrible seeing this large man with no mustache show up and just beat your boy's ass the way he did and then make fun of the trophy that Memphis was using for their TV title. Hansen looked completely unstoppable in every way for 5 minutes and then came back a couple months later to beat the blood out of Austin Idol for one of the couple dozen titles Memphis had. This was full unstoppable Hansen but I like that it was very clear Idol was jumped. The official match time is about the same as the one-sided mauling of Prichard, under 5 minutes. But this 5 minute match is preceded by the out of ring beating that leads to Idol's incredible blade job. Hansen jumps Idol in the aisle and it's a beating that stands out as good in Memphis. He does this thing during the beating that's so perfect. It's a thing Hansen can do that any other big guy could do but doesn't have the intuition or charm to do. While bleeding Idol out on the floor, he rolls into the ring - there was no count, the bell hadn't sounded - and just runs the ropes a few times at full speed before going back out to bleed him some more. I don't think any wrestler understands the value in this, to look this aggressive and unflappable at the same time, knowing your opponent won't be getting up and leaving while you run the ropes. 

Idol's blade job on this video quality makes him look like Hogan, the entire top of his scalp dyed red giving him the same blond horseshoe haircut. Hansen goes after that cut in some disgusting ways too, digging his heel into it and punching down at the cut multiple times, even doing his perfect kneedrops into the cut. He forces Idol into one of the most natural and effective ref bumps I've seen, shoving Idol with his boot so hard that it looked like Idol couldn't help but careen into the ref. Hansen's lariat in the ropes was as nasty as any he's hit in the middle of the ring. Idol did not go flying backwards to the floor, he absorbed it. There is a full arm smack as Idol is momentarily flattened between the ropes and Hansen and the crowd audibly reacts to the sound. Imagine seeing this monster destroy Austin Idol in his first night at the Mid-South Coliseum. Hansen could just show up in any room and any building and look like this, at any time.  

Austin Idol vs. Stan Hansen Memphis 9/19/83

MD: This time, Idol attacks before the house lights come up. Great fire as he takes it to Hansen and Hansen gives and gives. He eventually gets an inside shot in as he is want to do when pressed and takes over. The transition is him missing a second rope knee drop and Idol soften him up for his leglock. I imagine Hansen couldn't keep doing a big miss bump like that as the decade went on, not with any regularity but it would have provided a bit of welcome variety to his usual open door to vulnerability in AJPW (the missed lariat into the post). Before the leglock can happen, Hart gets up on the apron and everything devolves into chaos. Post-match, Hansen says he's going to show him a thing or two about the leglock, brandishes a chair to injury him, Lawler makes the save and Ventura comes up to set up the next tag because Memphis booking is a never ending churn of great stuff. I know I didn't say much about either match, but they were simple, straightforward, primal, territory wrestling perfection really.

ER: This is the weakest of the four Hansen/Idol matches, if only because it feels the least complete, but has a completely different charm than those other matches. It was also weakened by having a completely spaced out Randy Hales on most of the call instead of Lance Russell, and when Lance joined in he kept throwing too often to Randy. Randy sounded like he had never spoken about wrestling to anyone before this match. This one is more of an Austin Idol match. Idol got blindsided and brutalized a week ago, now he's back and not going to make the same mistakes. Hansen in Memphis is amazing, but also might be one of the places that Stan Hansen wouldn't have really "worked". I love Austin Idol and I love his offense. I love Lawler, Dundee, all these guys. The Memphis set was my favorite of the 80s sets. But watching Austin Idol work strikes with Hansen, I'm not certain all of these Worked Strike Masters play as well off Hansen as they do off men who don't seem so large and indestructible. 

I think Stan Hansen is a gifted seller. The way he drops to knees and gets staggered and backed up and the way he eventually falls is genuine talent, a real theatrical gift. His body control seems impossible for a man his size, but he does several degrees of staggering and lost steps that show he always knows the exact level of punishment he's supposed to be selling. Sometimes, however, it looks like he is selling almost too much. Idol was laying it in, but not laying it in for the level that is necessary to look like Hansen is actually taking damage. I don't know, maybe I'm up my own ass on this one. Hansen is just such an armored tank that the best worked punches in the world are only going to look as good as Stan Hansen can make them look. The missed knee off the top rope is a nutso spot for Hansen to use, like the John Nord kneedrop plancha a decade later. A man that size should not be able to jump off the top rope and land like that without blowing out his entire lower half. Hansen missing offense always seems to make more sense as a transition to his opponent, because again it just rarely feels realistic that someone is able to fight their way back into control. I wonder how often Hansen did a miss this spectacular. You have to have a finite amount of them. That's not a spot I'd seen him do - not like that - and I imagine the total number is low. Now we have one of them. Maybe it's the only one. 

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Found Footage Friday: HANSEN~! GORDY~! PARK~! FAKE KONNAN~! KENDOS~! MOCHIZUKI AND FRIENDS~!

Terry Gordy vs. Stan Hansen AJPW 6/8/90

MD: We only had around seven minutes of this previously and those seven minutes are pretty much what you'd expect, a super hardnosed finishing stretch between two monsters with gold on the line. I went through every single match we have on tape for 1989 and 1990 All Japan over the last five years or so, and, of course, we keep getting more, both in this format and with handhelds, but it's always enjoyable to push at the conventional wisdom and see how it holds up. I may have mentioned this before, but one of the biggest surprises of 1990 AJPW was how Baba dealt with the loss of Tenryu. This show obviously has Misawa vs Jumbo, right? And yes, there is a push throughout the year to promote Super Generation Army vs Tsuruta-Gun, but that often wasn't the main title scene for the back half of 89. When it came to the Triple Crown and the tag titles, it was foreign hosses up and down, Hansen, Doc, Gordy, Spivey, and even a bit of Bigelow thrown in for good measure. Off to the side you had Land of Giants and Abby and Kimala II, and even Andre. Big dudes. They couldn't present the larger than life force that was Tenryu, so they compensated with more conventional giants on top, all the while giving time for Misawa, Kawada, Kobashi to develop and become more and more credible. It was a giant bandaid and the flip flopping of the Triple Crown is a great example of it.

With the full footage, what we see here is a title match style fight between two absolute monsters. They work it like Jumbo would often work his title matches, on the mat and with holds, but with these two that meant wrenching of necks and grinding of faces, just brutal stuff, power against power, with technique only utilized to open the door for more rough and tumble hurting. It's twenty minutes of the two of them throwing every imaginable strike at one another, just laying it in and meeting each other half way. On some level, every time they dropped down to a hold felt like a momentary mercy, because at least they weren't absolutely smashing each other, but then you saw the hold and just how hard they were struggling against one another to put on the pressure or how to escape and you realize that there's no mercy in a world where there's a title between Hansen and Gordy. It all escalates towards moments of opportunity, Hansen hitting a lariat out of the corner as Gordy goes to the well one too many times, Gordy (who survived that lariat only by rolling out of the ring) ducking another wild flailing arm to sneak in his DDT. Ultimately, Gordy couldn't hit the powerbomb. It was never a case of a simple block though. It was Hansen going up and getting squashed in his attempt at self-preservation, bodies clashing and crashing in unique, visually striking ways. Gordy decided that the only way he could really get an edge on Hansen down the stretch was that corner clothesline, turning his body into a freight train thundering across the ring. Hansen hit that first lariat out of it, and then later on he got an amazing roll up nearfall, and in the end, stopped it just long enough to duck and create distance for a second lariat and the win. This was the sort of program that had to carry the company though, so post match Doc rushed into prevent the celebration and to destroy Hansen. Really an amazing title match now that we have all of it. People should go back for this.

PAS: Holy hell what a war, on first impression this felt on the level of the absolute best Gordy matches ever, and in the same tier as the Hansen All Japan bangers. It felt like these guys were both taking things personally almost from the beginning. There are some really grinding collar and elbow tie ups, and Hansen took Gordy into the corner and popped him hard right on his ear, and from that point on it felt like a series of escalating receipts by each guy, getting uglier and uglier. Every facelock, kneebar, stomp and punch felt like it was getting out of hand. The little stuff was awesome, and the big stuff was huge and incredible. Hansen takes an incredible bump and sell on Gordy's DDT and we get a couple of incredible Hansen lariats. Post match was awesome too as Hansen may be the only person on earth who can look momentarily credible brawling one on two against the Miracle Violence Connection.  This feels like as good as a discovery as we have ever had in this project, an all-time great match in a way which is just completely missing from pro-wrestling these days. Loved every second.

ER: It's wild to find out this late in the game that Misawa/Jumbo might not have been the best match at Budokan on 6/8/90. Getting the missing two-thirds of a Triple Crown Title change 35 years later makes me think that All Japan was suppressing the footage of the better match that night so as not to overshadow the then-biggest moment of Misawa's career, because now we know how special Gordy's transitional Triple Crown loss really was. Somehow, we are still finding matches that raise the stock of two different legends. This is one of the greatest Stan Hansen singles match performances of all time, and it might be the actual greatest singles match performance of Terry Gordy's career. The full footage gives us such a captivating fight between two killers, Gordy coming off as a man who has no plans on losing his new title, forcing Hansen into one of his finest ever vulnerable performances. Hansen sells more in this match than any match I've seen, and he is amazing at it; Gordy comes off so mean and so punishing that it gives us the gift of a Stan Hansen match where he's working from underneath for longer stretches than you've seen. What a gift. 

We never got to see all of the matwork in this special affair. That's always the first thing that goes. But Gordy and Hansen work the mat in a way we will never see again, and rarely saw then. This was not two men going for guard passes, this was two huge men shoving each other around on the mat, a constant struggle lock-up turning into fight from their bellies, both men laid out but applying full pressure to the other. Every quick headlock turns into more super heavyweight mat resistance, any attempt to pick up the other man turns into both men falling on top of each other and fighting more from a horizontal position. Te best part of the matwork? Each man punching the other's downed body from their knees, in a way that looked more like a alley mugging gone murder. More matwork should have Terry Gordy punching down from his knees like he's stabbing an intruder. 

Hansen flattens out on a Gordy attempt at a double leg, Gordy pancakes Hansen when Hansen's body goes out from under him blocking a powerbomb, a Gordy DDT spikes Hansen and drops his full weight on Gordy; Gordy can use Hansen's size and aggression against us, and it leads to Hansen more desperate than we ever get to see. How many times have you seen Hansen get slumped in a corner, resting on the bottom buckle to hold himself up. How many times have you seen Hansen absorb an impact and drop to his knees or stomach, fall on his face, fall over the bottom rope. Terry Gordy makes Stan Hansen fight like a desperate man and I can count on one hand the number of men who have effectively done that. Stan Hansen desperately pulls Gordy by the trunks from his knees just to bury his head in Gordy's stomach, behavior you never see Hansen need to ever entertain. Look at the way Stan Hansen scrambles for three different cradling leveraged pins, and how they're three of the best pins in any title match. Hansen was using his off balanced weight and trying to force and keep Gordy's shoulders to the mat in ways he never has to do with anyone else. Terry Gordy was one a higher plane and never flying higher, and we get to see a Stan Hansen who is actually coming up against something dangerous. 

But also? Stan Hansen rocks Terry Gordy's shit on multiple crowd gasping occasions. There might be nothing I love seeing more in pro wrestling than Stan Hansen kicking a downed man with his entire lower leg. Every Hansen kick to the length of any man's body gets the exact same celebratory reaction from me, a Guaranteed Oof. I revere Guaranteed Oofs. Their durability provides consistent comfort in ways we shouldn't take for granted. I would scream the ugliest scream of my life if Stan Hansen had kicked me in the chest or kneed me in the cheekbone the way he did Gordy, and I would be left with neck pain for life with either of his Out of Nowhere/Always There lariats. Any match that has a surprise Hansen western lariat that doesn't lead to the finish, is swung blindly, at eye level, making Budokan jump to its feet, it's a guaranteed great match. 

Stan Hansen doesn't work the lariat into any match for the hell of it. He has plans in store when the lariat works as a mid-match reset, a way to slow his beating and stop a hungry zombie. Terry Gordy loses his Triple Crown - he looked so fucking cool and convincing carrying those three belts, that a Japanese man was holding a large Confederate flag at ringside. How fucking weird is that? - three days after winning it, but he beat Stan Hansen so bad that Hansen had to use a Desperation Lariat. This was one of the greatest matches of the 90s, and of two guys who had eras of great matches. 

It will never be like this again.  

Kendo Star/Kendo/Monarca vs. Principe Island/Konnan/Hombre Bala CMLL 1990?

MD: Another week, another young Park match. These really do help the guy's already stellar case as he's fascinating to watch here. First of all, tho3 ugh, this Konnan el Barbaro, being not the Konnan but instead some tree trunk like big lug, was kind of just there. It was funny towards the start of the segunda where he was jumping up and down to feed all of Kendo and Kendo Star's flourishes but with no life to it. He did take a crazy bump that we barely saw upside down into the chairs during the comeback so good for him there. He also had a pretty swank furry jacket, so that was something. Hombre Bala matched up well with Kendo Star to start, and may have been a central pairing though it was hard to tell.

Really, we're watching this for Park though, and he was paired with Kendo and the two of them meshed perfectly. Kendo was a guy who knew how to be theatrical, knew how to play to the crowd, knew how to come off like a Star, and he knew how to get the most out of a petulant bastard like Park. They were able to rope run and feed for each other and everything else, but they had a great bit where they just got in each other's face, escalating from stares to slaps to pushes to a dropkick from Kendo with Principe Island charging back in only to slump in a fit of unreleased angst. The beatdown was fine, but Principe was outside for a good chunk of it. I did like the double stretch they took the fall with, like a rudo version of la estrella. The comeback came when they were really laying it in on Kendo with a triple team and saw some big bumps like the one from Konnan. Finish was clever, as the refs were tied up with the other four doing some spots in the corner and Principe slipped in a brutal foul on Kendo. It got overturned post match but everything stayed chippy and hot. The Kendo vs Principe Island rivalry was prime for a hair match. Again, he was just so emotive and seething with upstart energy in these matches. It's crazy to think that he had most of the rest of his career as a mask and didn't lose a bit of the charisma.

Masaaki Mochizuki/TARU/Takashi Okamura vs. Masakazu Fukuda/Kamikaze/Hiroyoshi Kotsubo WYF 3/20/1997

SR: This was the first match between these 6 guys. All their matches are great, and this is in Korakuen Hall and feels especially wild because WYF fans hate the karate guys at this stage, so it feels ultra heated.  Match was pretty much the perfect mix of shootstyle and WAR-esque potatoes/scrappiness with that trademark WYF levels of unpolished, dirty fighting. Early goings were really good as WYF guys kept their opponents grounded in scrappy fashion. Even Kotsubo looked really good as he kept taking downs with explosive shooting takedowns, at one point even leading to both guys tumbling outside and brawling on the floor.  Kamikaze is impeccable in these matches, kicking people in the face, hammering a guy with punches and taunting the karatekas further. Fukuda also looked great - just hurling dudes with suplex that looked insanely forceful, and trying to crush peoples face with dropkicks and stomps. Buko Dojo guys started breaking out their kicks later and it's everything you can ask for. There's a pretty great dive sequence, Mochizuki flying at people with kicks, Buko guys breaking up pins and submissions with nasty kicks etc. Even the Kotsubo vs Taru matchup which is really shit on paper ends up being good. WYF was striking gold with  this feud in 1997, and I'm so happy we get the beginning of the feud, really heated and violent from the get go.

MD: As familiar as Sebastian is with this stuff, it's a stretch for me. It's good to stretch though. If this is new to you, here's a cheat sheet. On one side, Taru has the shinier black vest. Okamura has the mullet. And Mochizuki has the white letters on his back. On the other, Kotsubo has the singlet, and Kamikaze has the frosted tips for his hair. That's about all you need along those lines. What I love about this is that it seems to encompass just about every style of pro wrestling except for hiding the object. It's presented, more than anything else, as shoot-style adjacent, with a lot of strikes and struggles for holds, but the fact it's a six-man (and I love tag wrestling in this setting) forces pro wrestling nonsense on it right from the get go; I'm talking controlling in corners and coming in to break up holds or even to join them. You'll have guys rolling around on the mat or throwing kicks and then immediately Mochizuki will be training slaps with Kotsubo or doing dropkick/spin wheel kick spots where they crash into each other. It takes itself seriously and treats everything with weight and respect while still building up to over the top stuff before dragging it back down to more fundamentally sound grappling or sparring. Fukada will toss people around. Things will spill out to the floor. The crowd pops for just about every piece of impact. And it all builds to dives, top rope moves, and bombs. They're able to layer it throughout the match and put weight behind the impacts, underpinning it all with animosity, so it never quite feels like excess no matter how much they squeeze into twenty minutes. 

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Found Footage Friday: HANSEN~! SPIVEY~! KOBASHI~! ACE~! PUTSKI~! FUJI~! KUWAIT~! SMOTHERS~! EATON~! ROCK 'n' ROCKERS~!

Ivan Putski vs. Mr. Fuji WWF (Kuwait) 1982

MD: The Rex match might have been technically better and even more primal and straightforward in some ways, but this had astoundingly glorious bullshit. At the two minute mark of the video, Fuji starts to play "hide the salt" and they milk it for another three and a half minutes before locking up, with the fans getting more and more into it as the ref can't catch him. Fuji eventually gives up with it and they start cycling through holds that Putski can power out of. Fuji gets an advantage on an armbar by pulling the tights to get Putski down but he ultimately gets a hyper noogie for his trouble. The crowd is loving every second of this so far, much like the Rex match; Putski just has a special relationship with them and Fuji isn't at all afraid to make goofy faces and flail about. Around twelve minutes after the goofiness with the salt started, Fuji finally gets it in Putski's eyes. This triumphant moment earns Fuji a bit of karate and a nerve hold before Putski shakes it off, hits two back body drops, and chases a retreating Fuji to the back. Another good time had by all. I don't know what this says about me, but I can watch Fuji hide salt in front of an irate crowd all day.

ER: People cannot get enough of Kuwait superstar Ivan Putski, and they show nothing but confused indifference for Fuji's salt ceremony...until they clearly see that Fuji is saving salt for Putski's eyeballs. I wish I knew more about the average Kuwait wrestling show attendee's familiarity with classic wrestling heel tropes. I want to see Bobby Heenan hiding a weapon for 20 minutes in Kuwait, slipping it in his boot and back in his trunks and even standing on it. Imagine Lawler hiding a weapon that doesn't actually exist and getting these men (No Women Allowed in the Kuwait Wrestling Club) to lose their minds, tearing their keffiyehs from their heads. Fighting Ivan Putski is like fighting a person in one of those inflatable dinosaur costumes. Much like the Moondog Rex match this week, there are some tremendous strength spots. 

I could see a lot of these spots done by a skinny fat super indy undercarder and played for hack laughs, but the exact same spots done by a completely gassed 5'4" man in early 80s Kuwait play like the pinnacle of the genre. Fuji breaks Putski down to his knees with a nerve hold, both hands digging into Putski's armpits while clutching his pecs, and in an incredible moment Putski rises to his feet and begins loosening Fuji's grip by flexing his large pectorals, Fuji's eyes growing wider, hands still gripping Putski's fleshy muscular breasts, Putski going through every posedown challenge to break the vice, a Most Muscular pose with unbroken eye contact finally freeing him. Putski's strikes get better the longer the match goes. His headlock punches have more intensity than Nolan Ryan's, and his elbow strikes to Fuji's chest in the ropes bounce him wickedly. But when that salt finally comes back into play, it's glorious. Fuji sneaks it into Putski's eyes and Putski swings his short T-rex arms blindly at him, while Fuji stays just out of arms reach throwing throat thrusts and headbutts. But Ivan Putski is the Most Powerful Man in the World and, much like the Philistines blinded Samson and still felt his full wrath, Fuji is soon tossed hardway by two backdrops, and flees the building before it all gets pulled down on top of him. 

Stan Hansen/Dan Spivey vs. Kenta Kobashi/Johnny Ace AJPW 11/20/90

MD: Pulling this back from the middle of the handheld card as it's the last major match we haven't covered yet (there's a Ricky Santana/Doug Furnas vs. Dick Slater/Joel Deaton match which isn't all that interesting and an opening match Teranishi/Kikuchi vs. Fuchi/Ogawa match that I don't promise I won't cover in the weeks to come). It's always fun to hear Kobashi come out to Kickstart My Heart. The contrast here is good. Early Kobashi/Ace (the All-Asia stuff) can be frustrating if they're up against a small, quick team and you get a lot of action and not a lot of weight to anything. But there is nothing but weight when you're in there against Hansen and Spivey. Obviously, Hansen is the real muscle, but Spivey starts this match out by catching Ace off a cross body and just SOS-ing him over his head and shortly thereafter, when Kobashi tries to get technical with him with a leglock, just jams his leg down upon Kenta's face in the nastiest way possible. Spivey wasn't a bad Hansen partner by any means. He was big enough and had some presence but it was also believable for Kobashi to bounce back off the ropes and drop him with a heart-filled shot.

Whenever this hits the outside, it gets great. Hansen just uses the rail and a chair and even this big wooden table. He was better smashing Ace with it than going for the lariat against it, though, as he took out his own arm opening up a fairly lengthy "contain the beast" bit from the two of them. You can't keep Hansen down (in 1990) for long though, and they rotated about until they were beating Kobashi down, with him surviving despite the odds and some nasty shots (including the aforementioned chair shot). At one point Ace broke up a submission by running in and bounding off the ropes with a clothesline but he got absolutely nailed by Hansen the second time he tried it (which was happening more and more in AJPW at this point and was always a great spot). The comeback was wonderful and imaginative, with Kobashi ducking a double shoulder block that sends both Hansen and Spivey to the floor. A dive on Spivey and a suplex on Hansen followed and Ace and Kobashi got in some hope that they might, maybe, steal this one. But of course it wasn't to be. Hansen got fed up and lariated one after the other in quick succession to end it. At this point in their development (where they may have won the secondary titles but were still losing to Jumbo/Partner and even Misawa/Kawada), Kobashi and Ace just hanging as well as they did meant something to the crowd.

ER: I'm not sure how many things in wrestling make me smile wider than Stan Hansen running to the ring through a parting see of fans, chasing after some, swinging his bullrope at others. Danny Spivey looks huge here, like the World's Largest Wings Hauser. He's several inches over Hansen whenever they're next to each other. Did Stan Hansen gift every touring gaijin tag partner his own set of chaps, like a leather goods Ribera Steakhouse jacket? Underneath his Gifted Chaps, Spivey is wearing Daisuke Ikeda's future ring gear, larger. There's a woman in the crowd who loves him and yells SPIVEY all match long. For her, he leans into a strong Ace clothesline and bumps big for a Kobashi back suplex. I love the precision and speed that Spivey and Hansen used to get Kobashi to the floor, slammed face first into a table, and rolled back into the ring. It was like 5 seconds flat. Hansen just threw Kobashi's body like he was a bag of autumn leaves. Stan Hansen was the first guy I ever saw do the Ringpost Chop and I thought it was incredible. Here he tries to take Johnny Ace's head off with a lariat and instead Western Lariats a thick table as hard as he would lariat a man. Hansen was a genius at hitting offense into inanimate objects, thrown as if he never once expected he would miss. 

Nagoya, in one night, got to see over 10 minutes of Stan Hansen and Abdullah the Butcher getting cut off decisively from their tag partners, and I love whenever Hansen is the Man in Peril. He is both great at selling while in offense, and also a constant threat. Kobashi and Ace are like two cops trying to take down a guy on PCP, just swinging chops and feet, always a second from lashing out. Hansen is great in peril, and he's even better getting his revenge. Cower at the ease with which he throws Kobashi with a head whipping bodyslam, or the way he and Spivey launch Kobashi with a backdrop and Stan is already falling on top of him with an elbow. Hansen and Spivey miss a tandem 3 point tackle into the ropes like two men who weren't expecting to hit the ropes, because Stan Hansen tis a man who has considered the concept of object permanence. Kobashi's pescado into Spivey hits flush. Hansen just beats the shit out of him. There's a really great sunset flip nearfall, where Ace does an unconvincing sunset flip and Hansen balances himself and starts knuckle punching Ace in the head, but Kobashi does a mountains-moving dropkick to send Hansen flying back into a close pin. He shuts that shit down swiftly and suddenly, putting Ace down hard on his back with a shoulderblock, backing into the corner as he calls for the Lariat. Kobashi screens into frame to save his dude and takes the absolute worst swinging hell arm to the nose, a fool of a man for startling a large blind man who never chooses Flight. Ace loses the match, but absorbs a comparatively polite lariat. 

Tracy Smothers/Bobby Eaton vs. Ricky Morton/Marty Jannetty Wrath Pro 2/18/07

MD: Speaking of glorious wrestling bullshit. This had Smothers on the mic to start (of course), with the usual threats to leave to get the fans chanting and then a great bit about having no heat with Morton. Tracy graciously said that if Ricky turned on Marty, he'd not only give him the right to ride with them, he'd give him five whole bucks. Morton didn't take the deal. That and Smothers making a show out of taking his shirt was the first ten minutes of the video.

Of all the various ways to watch and enjoy wrestling, there's only one that is unquestionably wrong: you can't quantify wrestling; if you're counting the number of kickouts or punches, you're doing it wrong. But you can speak about things more broadly in terms of time, especially in a narrative sense, sure, and with that in mind, I'd like to report that the next six minutes were Jannetty and Smothers goofing. Jannetty would get a takeover or reversal; Smothers would complain about the tights or the hair even if it made no sense given what actually happened; Jannetty would then do the move to the ref slowly to show him it was impossible. At one point he even had the ref do a counter on him to show him. It was six minutes well spent.

After some more stooging and clowning from Eaton and Smothers, they got about a minute of heat on Morton, before he came back and they went right to a double roll up and some more Smothers jawing including the singsong promise never to come back and yelling at everyone to go home. The entire video was around twenty-five minutes; 35 with ten more minutes of heat would have been preferable, but it's hard to complain too much about what we got given the venue and the age and filled out bump cards of the wrestlers involved. 

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Found Footage Friday: ARQUEROS DEL ESPACIO~! LOS TEMERARIOS~! TENRYU~! HANSEN~! FOOTLOOSE~! PANAMANIAN LUCHA RIOTS~!

Los Temerarios (Black Terry/Jose Luis Feliciano/Shu el Guerrero) vs. Arqueros del Espacio (Lasser/Danny Boy/El Arquero) UWA 1989 - GREAT

MD: Half an hour of pure action and motion here. Just one killer exchange after the next building to a tercera of multi-man spots and dives before honing in on an exciting finish. El Arquero is Robin Hood, generally considered to be a B-Team Alvarado, but this match is a great example how that has nothing to do with him and everything to do with how great his brothers are. He was spectacular here, including a step up moonsault press and an amazing contribution to the dive train. The VQ was a little rough, with a blue tint, so it was hard at times to tell Danny Boy and Lasser apart but they both more then held up their own so it hardly mattered. You could tell Feliciano and Terry apart on the rudo side but they based and kept up on all the exchanges equally well, each outdoing the last with every opportunity. The match started with a very good mat based Shu/Arquero exchange and basically didn't let up for twenty minutes and two caidas until things ultimately escalated even further. There wasn't really a beatdown or a comeback so the momentum shifts were slight and the finishes somewhat sudden but you definitely couldn't fault the action here.

PAS: Outside of a bit of a wonky finish, this is at the level of any classic trios we have on tape. Loved to get a chance to really see Shu El Guerrero do his thing. What a slick mat wrestler, he is so good at using Amateur style takedowns and level shifts. Robin Hood feels like a guy who if we had more footage of would have the rep of the rest of his family. He's so fast, so elegant in his movements, just a treasure of a wrestler to watch. Our boy Terry isn't a focus of this match, but looks like a great business like rudo in his ability to stooge, bump and base. I wish things didn't fall apart at the end, because before that this looked like an all time classic, and while I love unearthing cool oddities, finding an all-timer is really special.

ER: I'm a few days late to the party but was excited to check this one out. It delivered. It's 1989, but between the ref's untucked shirt and the video angle, it feels like a weird modern indy lucha. The main giveaway that it's 1989 is that no wrestler would be caught dead shirt-cocking it the way the Space Archers do. The matwork is modern as hell and showed hardly any light. When you're talking the Carlton Celebrity Room, the quality of your night depends on the luchador. You know, Jose Luis Feliciano, ya got no complaints. Feliciano was so quick, with Terry not too far behind him, both basing impressively for Danny Boy/Lasser. I'm not sure which one of them it was (if you're wondering, Shu has the mask with the white plume, Arquero is Robin Hood and has the bandit mask, Terry is the shortest Temerario), but let's say Lasser had two of the slickest armdrags I've seen, Robin Hood hits one of the sweetest moonsault presses (making contact while perfectly vertical and them landing on his feet like Kerri Strug) and a dive that was just as nice. If you're looking for the Terry highlights, my favorite bit with him was at the very beginning of the tercera. It's not the Black Terry you're used to seeing brawl through gravel, but it's great classic luchador Terry, a treat seeing him work airtight fast exchanges. 

Stan Hansen/Genichiro Tenryu vs. Toshiaki Kawada/Samson Fuyuki AJPW 7/16/89

MD: Just to put this into context, it's just five days after Hansen and Tenryu win the tag titles, on a Brody memorial show. In 89, we see Tenryu against both Fuyuki and Kawada in singles matches, but this tag is new to us. A person might expect all of them to go easy on one another since they were stablemates in Revolution, but that person simply wouldn't know the first thing about Genichiro Tenryu. This was a war, with Hansen and Tenryu working to teach Footloose a lesson and Kawada and Fuyuki fighting to prove a point, sure, but also for their very lives. They did best when they were able to work as a unit, and they shined most individually when Tenryu pushed them to far and they furiously fired back, Kawada with kicks and Fuyuki by punching Tenryu repeatedly in the face. More often than not though, they ended up on the ground having the meanest boots from Hansen and Tenryu crashing into their back or ribs. 

Hansen created emotional opportunity better than any wrestler ever and an Irish whip reversal never looked as real as when Fuyuki managed to reverse Hansen and throw his entire body into him with a back elbow so he could make a tag. Likewise, Kawada hit a front missile dropkick, which rarely looks great because it always just pushes his opponent into his own corner, into Tenryu who leaned into it and not away from it. All four of these guys leaned into everything, except for that tragic moment after Footloose had gotten Hansen on the ropes through staying on him two-on-one where Kawada went for a dive and crashed and burned as Hansen moved. There was a lot of that here, with Footloose knowing they had to take higher risks to stay in it and Hansen or Tenryu simply being able to move, including the finish where Tenryu got a clever cradle out of nowhere after a dodge. It was a clever finish but maybe a slightly anti-climactic one after the violence that preceded it.

ER: I really loved what Matt said about this match, and I love AJPW matches that have all of these little story elements going on that you can really get into, all of these little hierarchy moments where you know when Kawada or Fuyuki are really punching above their weight and the crowd is half getting excited to see how they might test Hansen/Tenryu, and half getting excited to see how Hansen and Tenryu are going to punish their insolence. But I also love AJPW matches like this where you can pay no kind of attention to the stories or relationships and just sit back at 1 AM on a Friday night and have a ball watching all these guys beat the hell out of each other. I love how hard Footloose came out of the gates, fearlessly going for the kill on Tenryu knowing that the punishment will be threefold. I couldn't believe how hard Kawada was throwing lariats in this match, what a murderer. When you are in a match with Stan Hansen and you are the one throwing lariats that make me flinch away from the screen, you are a murderer. I love how Footloose really felt like they were throwing the kitchen sink at the champs, how a lot of their strikes were thrown at odd angles and not just "proper kick exchange" form. It felt like Footloose were just wildly throwing all of their limbs at the larger champs and praying something would land significantly enough for them to capitalize. 

When Hansen tagged in and started going after Fuyuki's arm and shoulder (just to be a dickhead), it's so perfect that Footloose pay all of that back when Hansen misses a charge shoulder first into the corner. Hansen's lariat never even comes into play, but Footloose were so good at capitalizing and changing gears that it was easy to see them somehow getting an upset. The whole thing is wall to wall nasty kicks to the back, Kawada's wild missed running plancha, Hansen's great bump where he builds up a head of steam and crashes headlong between the ropes to the floor, and Footloose throwing their bodies as hard as possible at the champs. I thought the finish really worked, as not only did Tenryu's inside cradle look impossibly snug with no way of escaping, but I loved the visual of Tenryu having to "resort" to just using weight and leverage to win the match. Tenryu was getting beat worse than he expected, and instead of staying in and fighting fire with fire, he saw a quick way out and took advantage of it. I don't know if the finish would have worked as well in other Tenryu/Hansen title defenses, but I thought it worked perfectly here as the champs won but showed how vulnerable they might actually be, a vulnerability that was non-existent 20 minutes earlier. 

Sandoken vs. Rocky Star Panama 1980s

MD: More Panamanian lucha. The primera didn't waste any time. After a bit of jockeying for position, Rocky Star hit three dropkicks, moved Sandoken right into a butterfly suplex flawlessly and then press slamed him and locked in a bow and arrow for the win. The segunda was even more abrupt. Rocky Star pushed the advantage with some shoulder tackles, but ran right into a fairly nasty submission all within a minute. So in that regard, this felt almost like modern CMLL. They had a long tercera and they did a lot. Rocky Star just had a lot of stuff in general. Neckbreakers, goardbusters, drop down No Future style kicks. Sandoken's comeback was big but could have been even bigger, and led to the dives. I loved the finish. Rocky Star made a grab between the legs with the ref trying to talk to Sandoken. In doing so, he made it so Sandoken's leg fouled the ref. That gave him an opening for a foul of his own and the win. The fans, as you can imagine, were not pleased and the last five minutes of this clip are people walking around with chairs over their head threateningly. At first I gave it the benefit of the doubt as there was a lot of potential energy but very little kinetic energy and figured that maybe they were just packing the place up for the night, but nope, it all turned south by the end and became a well-deserved riot scene. 

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