Segunda Caida

Phil Schneider, Eric Ritz, Matt D, Sebastian, and other friends write about pro wrestling. Follow us @segundacaida

Sunday, August 09, 2020

Lucha Underground Season 4 Episode 21: Ultima Lucha Cuatro - Part 1

TL: We have gone from this series being one of the most sought after pieces of wrestling IP in a really long time to it being available for free on Tubi to watch from the built-in service that comes with my Smart TV. Just in time for us to put this show to bed for good over Ultima Lucha Cuatro. It's been so long since I've watched this I had to go back and read what I wrote for the last couple episodes to familiarize myself with it again but even then, I'm not sure I'll get there. This is very much going to be in-the-moment, based on the ringwork stuff from me. Character work be damned.

ER: So detective Vazquez has lived through a thousand years of society and she's just a cop? The things she must have seen, the dynasties she saw fall...and she's an LA detective? Are there vampires that just open their own paint store?

TL: For being 1,000 years old, Vazquez looks fantastic. Good for her. Extremely happy that her and Aerostar completed the pendant, as they're now going to be able to withstand a guard attack while traversing the Hidden Temple for their lost tribal icon. Hoping Olmec makes an appearance on commentary tonight.

ER: Lots to talk about in just the intros, because Vampiro makes the most ridiculous faces for the duration of Matt Striker's opening spiel. Vampiro was acting like he was reading along with a script, and was making these bug eyed affirmative faces every time Striker would finish a line. Also, it just hit me that Vampiro has hair. He was a big fat guy who voluntarily was shaving his head, intentionally looking like the boat zombie from Zombie!? Nobody shaves their head just to look cool, it's always a choice that's made for them. But Vampiro has hair and he makes reaction faces bigger than the biggest Jeremy Borash TNA reaction faces. Also, Melissa Santos' had a great dress/headband combo, very flattering and a cool style.


The Rabbit Tribe (Paul London/The White Rabbit/El Bunny) vs. Sammy Guevara/XO Lishus/Ivelisse vs. The Reptile Tribe (Jeremiah Snake/Daga/Kobra Moon)

ER: This kicked ass, the kind of bananas match you want from a LU multiman. I do wish the Rabbit Tribe hadn't been eliminated so early, but I like what they did while they were there. This could have been a real mess, but it turned out to be the best kind of mess. All of the jumbled attacks worked well when everyone was in the ring together, Jeremiah throwing big straight kicks at anyone on his path, then tossing his own team to their death. Jeremiah THROWS Kobra to the floor with a powerbomb, bouncing her right off White Rabbit, who just picks her up off the ground and throws her into the ringpost. Two great back to back bumps from Kobra, and the craziest one was yet to come. The dive train was cool, with El Bunny hitting a tiny tope con hilo while Ivelisse held open the ropes, then Ivelisse bent over the top rope while standing on the middle rope so Guevara could vault over her onto the pile (the camera guy really zoomed right up Ivelisse's birth canal, so I can only assume this episode was guest directed by Larry Clark), then Ivelisse flipped over the ropes to cap it off. I dug how everyone scattered, giving every side of the Temple a cool view of different action, but Sammy and Kobra Moon fight up to the top and get a great tease where Guevara almost throws her right off...before hitting a nutso Spanish Fly off the camera stage instead. Even though the move was performed perfectly and everyone was in place to catch, it's still flat out nuts. Plus, they did a great job in editing to not show the actual floor until they were flying off, so you had no idea if there were seven people or zero people down there to catch them. There were some strong pinfall saves, nice kicks to the back of the head, great use of fake blood when White Rabbit jams his gloved fingers down Guevara's throat, an awesome bit where XO fights back against the whole Reptile Tribe, just a ton of fun. This match really felt like season 1 LU, which is nothing but a big compliment.

TL: It's so wild to see Killer Kross go from LU to Impact to becoming The Next Big Thing in NXT in the span of like 18 months. I remember when he called out Batista at Bloodsport and kinda scoffed, but now he's pretty undeniable, and as if on cue, he destroys all six of his opponents only to eat a quintuple superkick. Guevara's excitement is so palpable here, and it's really wild to me that he got used as fodder for Jake Strong like he did. The big Spanish Fly dive was really well done, and him getting the first pin to eliminate the Tribe was a nice touch, but again, with how Kross was built up throughout the season, it seemed like a waste of him here, which unfortunately seems to be this season's MO. The blood was a great touch, like Eric said, but I would have just liked to see a Kross/Guevara singles match, especially with how much Guevara has impressed in his AEW run. The final fall started off really well with the Ivelisse near-fall, and even dug Vampiro's comparison to a World Cup match where a team gets a red card and has to play with 10. Okay, the timing of the near falls here has been REALLY good, and has done a good job of building up the challengers as underdogs, and XO's fire out of the corner really played up, and the extra shot by Jeremiah to give Daga the submission was a nice touch. The booking was a bit much, but the match was exactly what it needed to be given the stips. Feels like the least interesting team won, though.


Ricky Mundo vs. Taya

ER: This is exactly what it should have been: a mostly one sided massacre to blow off a story that never had legs. Once Mundo's creepy doll got involved this went beyond a dark obsession story into something into something eyerolling with no chance of an interesting payoff. And so, the only answer was to have Taya take everything in a short match. I liked Taya landing heavy on a couple crossbodies, the curb stomp looked good, and the post match table spot with Taya letting out her ruined wedding aggression was the best this was going to be. It's smart to know your limits and I'm glad they didn't make this into some overblown epic that it was never going to be. They spent the correct amount of time on it, and you need that kind of smart editing.

TL: I'm not really into this at all because of Ricky more than anything, but Taya showed some nice fire. I wish it was more one-sided than it actually was, with a Taya steamrolling being more emphatic, but LU has always been about the hand-holding for references to previous parts of the storyline, so given that, they hit all the right notes and Taya stood tall. As Eric said, was exactly what it should have been.


Mask vs. Mask: Son of Havoc vs. Killshot

ER: This didn't work for me. It never felt like an actual big stip match, really it didn't feel any different from any other singles match these two have had against any other LU opponent. There were big spots, but every LU match with these guys has the exact kind of big spots that this match had, this match just had less of them (so I guess that means that they are more important?). Plus, the big spots didn't really look that great. Havoc's three big moments all saw him land physically short with his arms in front of him, with Striker even having to cover for his short SSP landing by saying he got Killshot with his head. The camera stand dive looked big, but Guevara's Spanish Fly 20 minutes earlier off that same camera stand looked way bigger. I liked the superplex onto the gurney, but the set ups for all these spots felt like they could have been tightened up in editing. The big shock is when Dumb Donald finally takes off his knit cap to reveal Shane Strickland!

TL: The matches that led up to this left a lot to be desired, even though I came away from them thinking Killshot was at least trying to do a bit more than just throw out spots, and figured maybe the blowoff could lead to something more focused, but the focus came more from them remembering walking through their more complicated sequences. And then after the first Killstomp, it slows to a halt once the gurney gets involved, with them chewing up airtime more than them building up to big spots including either that or the table Havoc introduces. I think the play was for the match to be more deliberate than the Hell of War match, which was basically like a 20-minute adrenaline shot, but instead, it came off plodding, and knowing both the Hell of War match and what Sammy did earlier in the night, not even that Havoc splash in the table came off as good. The superplex into the gurney was pretty damn insane, but for Havoc to survive that, a Killstomp, and then a Storm Cradle Driver seems a bit much. The only thought in my head is "I really hope this doesn't end on a roll-up" and I'm holding on tight. I think the reason I'm not feeling this match as much is because I've seen a lot of the stuff they've done better either earlier in the night (strikes, dives, nearfalls) or in previous matches including either guy, but hey, if you're gonna finish a guy, a Shooting Star Press on a guy tied to a gurney will get it done. "History has been made!" says Matt Striker, and I agree, this match is now in my past. There just wasn't enough drama here for me to buy into the nearfalls, nothing was really earned. It came off flat and hollow. And wouldn't you know it, it's Jermaine Strickland, who basically drops the mic and heads for NXT mediocrity, which I guess is better than what can be said for most folks on this show. At the very least, it got the women in the crowd ready to cry, which is what you really need from an apuestas match. But not before Dante Fox shows up in stolen valor for their tribute to the troops as Strickland heads for Orlando.


TL: It really does feel like we're crawling to the finish line of this marathon, but I also feel like, especially given how the finale of previous Ultima Luchas have gone, we're going to see something absolutely wild given the environment they're working, which is really all you can ask for a show doing its swan song. At least send us home on a high note, even if it's been more slog than passion project this season.


COMPLETE GUIDE TO LUCHA UNDERGROUND


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Tuesday, December 17, 2019

Lucha Underground Season 4 Episode 18: Spiders and Skeletons

Matanza vs. Taya

ER: I liked how the mixed it up here, at least having Taya be maybe the only person who has not been sacrificed against Matanza this season. Worldwide Underground has been pretty absent from the last many shows, didn't think they'd show back up by the end of the run. Taya doesn't look great against Matanza, they overused the SFX, she threw two love tap kicks to the balls that really should have been made into a bigger deal; Matanza sold them like he didn't realize she had thrown a strike, Vampiro wasn't even sure she had kicked him low, and that's the kind of spot that could have provided actual drama. Has Matanza been kicked in the balls before? Do we know how he'd react? Does he possibly have no genitals? Was there an online graphic novel that explained that Matanza's genitals were burnt in a fire? I mean, so much time has gone by since the introduction of the Matanza character that it could have been the very first thing we learned about him. It's not hard to picture Dario yelling to the temple "Hees genitahls wur sacruficed...toothuh GODZZZ." But the spot is absolutely meaningless and could have been much more. Mundo makes his return and saves Taya from potential sacrifice, and then throws some of the worst grounded elbows mine eyes have seen. The man has murdered several people, you can lay in the elbows a bit.

TL: A match that had part of me thinking, "How are they going to book their way out of this corner by not killing Taya?" And that's how they did it, with her getting 2/3 of the match, kicking Matanza in the aforementioned questionable cajones, and then, somehow, someway, being in the best position to win the match? And then quickly, Matanza remembers, "Oh, right. I'm Matanza." Right in time for Johnny to kick and capoeira slide his way into the mount for those elbows. Look, Morrison has made a career out of making the flashy look good. There hasn't been a single non-flying strike I've seen him throw that makes me think, "Hey, let's have him lightly tap Matanza's mask with the point of his elbow. That'll make everyone look good." Do love the idea that we are going to see Matanza sacrifice them both at some point, sending Johnny back to Titan and Taya, er...elsewhere.

Mil Muertes/Fenix vs. Dragon Azteca Jr./The Mack

ER: This has to be the best LU match of the season. It clocked in just under 10, presented us a couple fresh match-ups, and had a real gem of a Fenix performance throughout. Also, the team of Muertes and Fenix is SO much more interesting than the played out Lucha Bros. team and it's cruel that this is the only time we've seen it. Power Guy/Flyer teams can't get too much more awesome than Muertes/Fenix, and Pentagon is just a lame Muertes who spends time doing stupid hand gestures to fill in the gaps while Muertes just fills space by punching people. Fenix breaks out some of his all time greatest rope work, bouncing from the top to the middle to the top to the middle to his back, working a fantastic sequence with Mack where Mack blocks a frankensteiner by taking out Fenix's legs, only for Fenix to keep blocking his block by hitting that middle rope and springing right back. Fenix also had a couple of killer saves, the best was him leaping into the ring and kicking Azteca right in the back of the head (but I do love him running in with a punt right across Mack's face), and he bases like mad for Azteca. Azteca hits one of his most awesome tornado DDTs, Fenix tossing him up into the air like a drunk uncle tossing a baby before getting wiped out on the way down. Muertes was a real wrecking ball, and he and Mack had a nice short punch exchange in the middle, Mack takes a couple big spills to the floor, and I just adore this speed and power combo of Fenix/Muertes. There were only a couple moments of the match I didn't care for: Mack really wedged his stunner into the match, and it's an unnecessary cheap pop minor league baseball stadium spot that he doesn't need to do, let alone several times in a match; and we got a weird moment that could have been awesome, when Fenix just leveled a ringside camera guy while swinging through the ropes, looked like he just clocked this guy with swinging legs. Camera guy goes down, dramatically rolls through, and springs back to his feet triumphantly. I...don't get it? Is that dude in some kind of angle? Or did they just not edit out a moment where a camera guy took a kick from arguably the most notable kicker in Lucha Underground, and immediately brushed it off. Vampiro handled it as well as possible ("Even our camera guys are bad ass!") but call an audible dude, stay down. For a fed that edits everything, it's really bizarre that this was left in, which makes me think it was left in for a reason....but why?

TL: Mauro gets a lot of righteous criticism, but holy shit, Matt Striker just made a Meek Mill pun for Mil Muertes and that has me on tilt. Azteca and Muertes are a good pairing, I like seeing what they do together, and after the Fenix/Mack pair off, this hits a different level. PWG has had a house tag style for a while that lends itself more to elaborate set pieces and spots that become more non-sensical as the match progresses, and while they do use that as a template for this match, they hit things much more crisp, they sell better, and the high spots are even more impressive. Azteca with an insane lifting tornado DDT, then, his dive gets one upped by Fenix. Then Mack is like, "Hey, 300 lbs. No hands." So the pace for this has picked up, but they aren't doing shit that defies the idea of what wrestling is and spits in its face, essentially. Muertes breaks up a pinfall attempt with a goddamn straight right hand. The best thing this match does is give you just enough of the pairings that are to come at Ultima Lucha, and then in the off-pairings, it's like they take it up another level. Fenix's rope running in this match is at the highest possible difficulty and he hits it all clean. And then we get a decisive finish to boot. I mean, look, that tag match really shouldn't have worked at all due to the layout, but they not only made it work, but they excelled in making the pairings that meant something stand out AND built awesome transitions in the process. I don't know if I liked it to the extent Eric did, but it's hard not to look at this match in the grand scheme of this season and wonder why it took 18 weeks for folks to look like they gave a damn. Then again, these are four of the most consistent guys on the roster and they got time to show out. Excited to see what they do in their singles matches.

Ricky Mundo vs. Famous B

ER: I thought this was a pretty terrific Ricky Mundo squash, and made me more interested in him than anything up to this point. He hits a big headbutt (that the camera foolishly shoots from above) and looked like he was really laying in shots. Famous B got to cut a funny return promo before the match, and bumped like a loon for Mundo. Mundo's match winning neckbreaker could have looked like the indiest shit ever, except B whipped the back of his head right into the mat. I had forgotten about the Mundo doll thing, and I'm not really feeling a Mundo/Taya blowoff, but I liked what they did here.

TL: Ricky gets to wrestle! So does Famous B! This was fine. Famous B knows how to bump like a goddamn crazy person, at least. I'd like to bring up the psychosexual pretenses of Ricky going after Johnny's wife, but then you have Ricky doing the goddamn crossface on Brenda while laying on top of B and it's like the pretense is right there out in the open for everyone. I guess I'm trying to say Ricky wants to both kill Johnny and have sex with him. There. I said it. Now I feel dirty.

Pentagon Dark vs. Reklusa

ER: I must be back on that LU hype train baby, because this was another really good match! This was also one of my favorite matches on the season, coming just 15 minutes after another Match of the Season contender. Two in one episode? Lucha Underground is the greatest! This match gets several things right that have been lacking this season, and they worked a cool match without any extra gimmicks. It helped that I think this was Pentagon's strongest performance of the season, and Reklusa may have been his most interesting opponent. Reklusa dove off the top during his entrance and proceeded to land grounded shots far harder than Johnny Mundo threw at Matanza earlier, and we get cool stuff on the floor like Reklusa going for a cannonball but getting caught and powerbomb tailbone first on the apron, and her selling Pentagon's leg kicks more effectively than anyone else has all year, really looking like she gets the nuance of a kick to the meat of the thigh. Pentagon based like hell here, catching a big rana from the top to the floor, and taking a tope/tornado DDT, both moves that could have easily flopped. He turned up the sadism, dropping Reklusa on the apron with a package piledriver, and Reklusa's bumping was really good throughout, taking some really tough spills and getting up each time. They even used the ball kick - the one I railed against earlier due to how sloppy and half-hearted it was used in the Matanza/Taya match - effectively here, making it look like Reklusa really could beat Pentagon. The match ending package piledriver was insane, genuinely looked like Pentagon's goal was to break the ring with Reklusa's head. This could be the best Lucha Underground match to feature someone who will only be in one Lucha Underground match.

TL: I actually haven't seen much of Chelsea's work, although I know she has a good presence and she's extremely athletic from the clips of hers I've seen. Love the plancha to start! You can also add, "Will recklessly take bumps on her tailbone on the apron" to that list. Dear God that's sick. Even when Pentagon goes on offense and he looks a bit more fired up than usual, Reklusa is selling like a QUEEN for him, glassy eyed, wobbly kneed, and actually making the sound effects seem worthwhile. And then she hits a goddamn rana from the top to the floor and follows up with Candice LeRae's tope con tornado DDT. This has been the Reklusa show and Penta is totally along for the ride, but I'll give him credit that he's at least bringing it more than he has in other matches this season. I guess I shouldn't be surprised that folks are kicking out of package piledrivers on the apron and Canadian Destroyers, but at least there was finality with the Fear Factor to finish. I now want to seek out more Chelsea Green, incredibly impressive stuff. Get her on NXT TV immediately. Dug the post-match angle, too, as Marty looked like he stepped out of a Creed video to absolve Penta of his sins. Absolutely wild how the intergender main events have killed it these last couple weeks. They've been the best part of the season by far to me. Somehow don't think Ricky/Taya will keep that run going.



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Monday, November 05, 2018

Lucha Underground Season 4 Episode 9: A Match Made in Heaven

ER: This may be an odd question...but was that actually Melissa playing Mariposa in the opening segment with Cueto? Her voice sounded completely different from how I remember her sounding (not merely the absence of her minor speech impediment, her voice just sounded different), and the mask covers enough that I actually have no idea.

TL: Was that…a competent set up for the main event? Like, did they actually lay out the consequences in a cogent manner for us to understand? Wild, man.

Mala Suerte vs. Matanza

ER: So now we've established bunny hop "boings" and speed bags SFX to our LU SFX canon. This was short but nobody died. Suerte hit a great baseball slide dropkick to start, Matanza hit a nice headbutt to cut off bunny hops and hit the Wrath of the Gods. But again, nobody died, which seems important to point out now.

TL: I literally cannot add anything to what Eric said about this match when those SFX were involved. Peak pro wrestling production, that.

Joey Ryan/Jack Evans vs. XO Lishus/Ivelisse

ER: I really liked this, especially as a showcase for Evans and Lishus. I wasn't excited for Joey opposite another woman, but I liked the turn into Joey being a full blown sex addict, just wanting any kind of touch and contact with any human (at minimum, any human). I think him being into getting slammed into XO Lishus' juicy hot ass and liking it is an important thing to happen. Sex addict is far more interesting than overt pervert. Lishus is a ton of fun, a great take on an exotico. The splits legdrop is good, and I also realized with his outfit, butt stuff, splits...he's basically cosplaying as Naomi. That feels like a level of exotico we haven't had in wrestling, an actual drag routine paying tribute to a fan favorite. The cartwheel slap is great with the character, and there was a hilarious moment with he and Evans, where Lishus ducked a clothesline and landed in a crabwalk, Evans overran him with the miss, ran back, but was chased into the corner with a quick burst of crabwalking from Lishus. Evans played it great, the timing was down, a genuinely funny and unique moment played perfectly. They went way too heavy on SFX for Ivelisse, she had a couple weak shots that came off comical with the loud thigh slap sound, but stuff like armdrags and ranas looked fine and she ate Ryan's offense well. Evans is still finding his place without WU, and I hope he's featured more from here now that he's away from WU. But he and Lishus owned here.

TL: I want to be a part of the conversations Joey has had with other folks to try and figure out how he could evolve his character. As Eric said, the climb from pervert to sex addict seems like the natural next step for him and who better to bring it out of him than Lishus, who has the athleticism that makes it look like he can hang with Jack F’n Evans step for step. Evans’ athleticism never ceases to amaze me; his springboard moves look out of control but also look like they kill folks. Yeah, the Lishus/Evans stuff was terrific, which led to the absolutely disgusting finish with the omoplata that really looked like a chokeout as opposed to all the other loosely applied MMA finishes you’d see in wrestling today. Stoked to see this get a longer feud, too. Ryan and Ivelisse were definitely in this match.

Mariposa vs. Dragon Azteca Jr.

ER: This was so short and really a nothing match. It was presented as an obstacle for Azteca but he didn't have too much trouble with Mariposa. It's a Lucha Underground update on an old early 90s Wrestling Challenge squash match. In one of those matches the enhancement talent would maybe get a dropkick or a couple elbows that get no sold. In a Lucha Underground squash match the enhancement talent still gets to break out a Kudo Driver moments after taking a huge 450 splash. The times they are a changin'.

TL: Love the foul to start the match during the belt presentation, love the kick to the inside of the thigh even more. Also love how in 2018, a 450 splash and a fucking KUDO DRIVER get 2.9s, but crossing the legs on a rolling prawn hold? Can’t get out of that, no siree. But hey, I’ve never wrestled before, so I don’t understand psychology, I guess.

The Reptile Tribe vs. Worldwide Underground

ER: So Striker says that Vibora is "striking in his absence" meaning nobody else knows about Vibora's death, but you'd think his absence would be focused on a lot more if that was the case. Instead they're just immediately cool with lizard Jeremiah Crane being the replacement. Also, could we have maybe done a little better than Jeremiah Snake? Here are a few off the top of my head with similar vocal patterns: Jereboa Crane, Jereviper Crane, Jereconda Crane. They aren't rhymes, but the syntax is the same as his original name and they roll off the tongue similarly. Or, they could have embraced their ridiculous side and further have their cake and eat it too, and he could have been Janaconda Cobrane. Also, I like that even in a rare 4 on 4 match, Ricky Mandel still isn't good enough to make the cut. I want them do have a 10 man tag to see if he has a shot at getting some playing time.

And I really liked this match. It was the right amount of fun and action, and really the fed should run more 8 man tags. I've gotten tired of their go to singles match style, but throw any 8 people from the roster in a ring and they should all have enough material to work a fun 10 minute match. You get less reliance on kickouts and more reliance on saves at that point, and a well timed save is more exciting to me than a big kickout. We get a ton of big dives, some complicated (like Kobra Moon getting launched into everyone by Jeremiah) and a couple impressive Aerostar ones, and a huge cannonball into everyone by Jeremiah. The pacing was kept brisk, and the whole thing was kept light which is a good thing because serious matches typically feature Striker reading a bunch of lousy copy about the Fates of Worlds and the Calamity of Man. The post-match worked for me too, even though the Macho Man stuff was all really obvious, I loved the Pomp and Circumstance playing while Mundo had Taya up on his shoulder. Taya's reaction to the proposal was good and as I've been wondering the past couple weeks this surely throws WU into full babyface, which isn't a bad twist. I somehow didn't notice the relevance of the episode title, which now seems like it should be saved for the inevitable wedding episode of LU, and I also somehow foolishly never considered a wedding episode for LU. We're well over 100 episodes at this point, and if we actually want to pretend that this is an actual TV series and not wrestling, then we're already into syndication and we're overdue for a wedding and a baby. We've already gotten to the point of the show where it's consistently going downhill from its peak, so now we need a couple of classic ratings poppers!

TL: The graphic leading into this match looks like it was made for an ECW TV main event in 1997, which is terrific. Big wet fart for the return of Crane as part of the Reptile Tribe. Don’t care enough to even make fun of the name. Aerostar wearing the bandana over his mask is as goofy looking as Klay Thompson wearing the bandana during his 14 3-pointer game last week, which means I love it. Vibora had been getting better so I’m a bit sad he’s not a part of this, because this seems like the type of match where he’d really stand out.

More wild atomicos match than I would have thought with this set up, as I figured there would be more pairing off than a whole bunch of dives, but they wanted a frenetic pace from the start. PJ Black’s hot tag that began with a bunch of first week training offense after the springboard was amusing. Nothing like armdrags and shoulder blocks to fire things up. The more I hear “Jeremiah Snake” the more I cringe. He also gets a lot of the match here, which is disappointing. Would have loved to see more Moon and Drago, especially considering Aerostar was brought in specifically because of his past with Drago. Instead, Drago gets to watch Aerostar hit his second ridiculous dive of the match and then take the fall. Postmatch was actually cool for the fakeout, Johnny being magnanimous, and the two-bit Savage aping. It was ELIZABETH who did the “Ooooohh yeah” part, man. C’mon. I’m not sure what wedding day shenanigans will occur to hold it up before it actually happens, but I’ve been entertained by WU skits to the point where I’d at least enjoy it. Can’t remember too many happy RobRod movie marriages, but maybe they’ll make an exception here.



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Thursday, September 13, 2018

Lucha Underground Season 4 Episode 4: Pain, Love and Sacrifice to the Gods

TL: Catrina trades in the dominatrix starter kit for the Jessica Rabbit dress sans sparkles thanks to a reverse Snow White? I mean, considering the magic threshold on this show, a wardrobe change seems like an odd way to show off your newly stolen lifeforce. Also, I’m sorry, but the dude’s LITERALLY NAMED FENIX. As in, HE RISES FROM THE DEAD. How are we not supposed to see him coming back from the dead after this? “Hey, Mark. We’re gonna call you Big Mac not because you’re super strong and your last name is McGwire, but because you’re a big fan of Burger King.” Zigging when they should zag, man.

Also, we get Striker saying Famous B might need a literal leg amputation due to what Jake Strong did to him two weeks ago, which is less believable than anything that happened with Catrina to open the show.

Big Bad Steve vs. Jake Strong

ER: Damn this was shaping up to be my favorite match of the new season, as it had the pacing of a cool big dude stiff fest (really looking forward to see what Google hits we get from "big dude stiff fest"), but then it kind of quickly flipped switch into full Jake Strong showcase squash. Strong and his flesh beard still come off a little mouth breath-y, but with Steve's bumping he came off pretty badass. Steve threw a couple of thee fucking best punches of 2018 in the middle of this, throwing one corker, and than a wrist bending shot right off Strong's forehead, staggering him. Strong had big shots to the gut, hard back elbows, stiff avalanche, wrestling tougher than I expected from his Impact run. After the match Strong hits a nasty powerbomb on the floor, Steve really getting planted. This was cool, really could have been awesome with a bit more time.

TL: Not gonna lie: Kinda want a shirt with the Big Bad Steve logo on it. The fact they actually made a logo for him is awesome considering a lot of folks in WWE can’t even get a damn shirt made. Steve has some great right hands as previously mentioned, as someone named Big Bad Steve should have, but they just look nasty as all hell, even with Strong’s stiff strikes going right back at him. Really shows how even the simplest of offense can make someone look good like that. We lost our boy Pindar due to beheading at the end of last season, so I’m definitely down to see Steve in his place as burly base with good looking offense. Strong squashes are necessity due to what they want him to be this season, but yeah, I wish this had more back and forth to it. Still, a good piece of business, as the kids say.

TL: As good as lucha masks and sweet suits are, lucha masks and cowboy hats are basically right there with them, and Cuerno makes it look good. Cage gets to flex and flex into a Muertes match next week and yeah, I am on board for that.

Daga/Kobra Moon vs. Johnny Mundo/Taya

ER: Really fun match, Mundo and Taya working full on babyface, and Taya looks to be having a blast with it, and it's kind of infectious. She really laid it in too, hitting some spirited back elbows and strikes, kicking Moon in the back of the head and hitting a sick curb stomp that bounced her forehead off the mat. Mundo hit his timing spots nicely, he and Taya actually come off tas the rare cool "shades of gray" characters, that can work either way one week to the next. Moon took a nice beating here, and Daga runs nicely into Mundo kicks. I liked this a lot more than I expected (just like Strong's performance, I must be in a real good mood, leaded instead of unleaded.

TL: I really want to like Daga because he’s got the athleticism and looks like a guy who can hang either as a tecnico or rudo, but he just doesn’t have charisma like you’d think. Taya was the standout here, doing a good lucha sequence with Daga and just bringing the stiffness with her strikes. That curbstomp was NASTY, as was PJ Black’s kick to set it up. Don’t know if I liked it as much as Eric, but it certainly didn’t suck.

ER: We're definitely into Leaded territory here because I dug that Vibora wrecking ball segment after the mixed tag. Vibora hitting goateed lizard cannonballs and big boots was apparently just what I needed.

TL: So Vibora goes off in the offseason and has some honest-to-god improved offense and looks like way better ring presence. Suffice to say, if this Vibora is the one we get this year, count me in.

Mr. Pectacular vs. Matanza

ER: I didn't feel like seeing Mr. Pectacular (although maybe in my good mood I'd like him in a gassed Power Plant trainee kind of way), and Matanza puts in a nice unlocked and unleashed squash. He hits a cool twisting back suplex after throwing Pecs into the corner, and then hits probably his greatest Wrath of the Gods, stopping, pivoting, feet leaving the mat to slam him the other way. A nice comeback for a person who murdered someone by ripping their face off a couple seasons ago.

TL: Pec just makes me miss Tino Sabbatelli (who, coincidentally has a pec injury right now), but he takes a great beating here. The Matanza body control points have been pointed out time and time again by us, but this was it at the top of its game. Everything had extra oomph to it, and sign me up for an unleashed Matanza, which was my favorite part of Season 2. This was a Mil Muertes-level squash here.

Chavo Guerrero Jr. vs. King Cuerno

ER: Wasn't expecting the comeback of Chavo, and it's good to see him still. a guy who should get more credit for what he's done. Chavo can still put on a good show, limps out a tweaked knee, hits a heavy crossbody, bumps hard over the top the floor, eats a chairshot, do some nice balance beam fight work around the raised barrier (which Cuerno hits a great high crossbody off of); Chavo is like the better version of David Sierra, and that's a good thing. We do get an unfortunately messy teeter totter spot, with Chavo setting up way close to the ropes, but Cuerno got through the spot well, and hit his bullet dive right after, which was convenient timing. I thought both came off well overall, but Cuerno came off stronger and that's more important.

TL: It’s funny that Eric waxes strong on Chavo to begin this after what I said about Muertes in our last review. Totally agree that he’s underrated in a way, and that he’s done a lot in a career that’s basically a quarter century long. I think I might be higher on Cuerno than other people, as I always liked his offense, and he shows off some personality here, too, playing to the crowd and helping build to the big spots, like the aforementioned bullet tope (preceded by an awesome top rope sunset flip). Guerrero shtick never really gets old, and Chavo knows how to do little things in matches that stick out. Enjoyable stuff and yeah, a good ending to a good top-to-bottom episode. The further we are away from the season premiere, the more this is turning into a show I enjoy watching again.

ER: My favorite episode of the season so far, We got manageable length matches with big dudes doing cool spots, just a really fun quick moving show. Felt exciting and action packed.


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Wednesday, March 28, 2018

Lucha Underground Season 3 Episode 39 Ultima Lucha Tres Part 3

1. Last Luchadora Standing: Taya vs. Sexy Star

ER: So this worked better than it should have, and was probably Sexy Star's best actual performance. I think I've said in several other matches something along the lines of "This was probably the best possible match that _____ could have had with Sexy Star", and while I can't say she was actually good in it, for the most part, this felt like her best actual performance. All Sexy Star matches will always have that feeling of minding a toddler while he waddles around a playground: You're omnipresent and next to them at all times, but they don't really take your suggestions on what to do, and sometimes they'll stare at things overly long, and then they'll point and shout something unintelligible at something, and then they'll need help climbing steps, and they'll grab things that don't belong to them, and you don't really feel like you're needed there but need to be there constantly trying to catch them if they fall. Sexy Star kind of toddles around the Temple, and Taya follows her around, throwing herself through chairs and into grating and into tables and bleeding. For her part of things, Star slaps Taya with authority, lands a couple stomach kicks, and throws shots to the back of Taya's neck that actually look painful. They fall into a lot of things, chairs, the bleacher seats, a table, and it almost always looks good. I don't want to see Sexy Star wrestling anymore, but I appreciated that she tightened a couple things up in what should be her last LU match (unless season 4 is already planning on being the Season of Sexy!).

TL: Take a drink every time Striker says “war.” Seriously, it’s amazing. I remember saying it maybe a time or two too many during a recent PPW main event, but he’s in love with the word. Taya got one of my favorite Jeremiah Crane performances out of him in the Cueto Cup and so I am all in on her actually making a Sexy Star match good with her bumping and stooging. Taya even blades, which I am not surprised at in the least. God, hindsight is amazing here with Striker saying Sexy fights for what’s just and ethical. My favorite part about Eric’s toddler analogy is when I look up and see Sexy literally crawling around the ring as if she can’t find her favorite pacifier. They really do lay it in, at least, with the chops looking good even if the sound effects oversell their effectiveness. Sexy does lead Taya around by the nose everywhere; it’s amazing how much Taya is chasing her in this match. The garbage spots do look good, even if there’s a few times where things got telegraphed, but Taya really had a great performance here again. Now make sure there’s no more Sexy Star in Season 4. After the bullshit she pulled last year, she doesn’t deserve to be back, let alone get a push similar to what she got in Season 3.

2. Pindar/Vibora/Drago vs. The Mack/Killshot/Dante Fox

ER: I like this, very edgy subversive stuff here, an impressive Black Lives Matter allegory having every black member of the roster trying to save their America by waging global war against the Deep State Lizard People. It's some pretty revolutionary stuff here on hour 3 of Ultima Lucha Tres. And you know what? I really liked this as a title win for Mack/Killshot/Fox. The Lizard People have been really disappointing as champions, feels like they shouldn't need belts. But Mack's team winning felt like a great tecnico moment, and there aren't a ton of great tecnico moments in this fed that aren't immediately made bittersweet. I don't really know if the match was good, but it felt like a couple doors shutting that had been open for way too long. The Lizards haven't felt as big as they probably anticipated, so it's a good time to dial them back a bit, and the Fox/Killshot feud went on too long and I'd rather see their style as a team than as opponents. Mack came off - again - like a major star in the match, and they really messed up by not shoving him high up the card way quicker. It may get there eventually, but Mack is a guy they could make face of the company, and should. Although I can't believe that the cameras switched away and miss most of Vibora's bump off the Pounce. I don't think I've ever even seen Luchasaurus take a bump, so Mack making him fly off his feet feels like it should have been a big deal. Striker takes forever wrapping up a bootlace-as-secret-code story to just say that Fox and Killshot are working nicely together. I also really liked Pindar in this, he's been a great add to the roster, and I'd love for him to be repackaged. He is an awesome base, gets to show a little bit of personal lizard pride by refusing Kobra Moon's demand that he use a chain, and he's one of the few guys to opt to do a moonsault to sell a Stunner. Has anyone done a moonsault stunner bump? Rock would infamously handspring his way across the ring, but I don't know if I've seen a moonsault bump from it. Dante Fox's back still looks completely disgusting (his death match was filmed the day before!), and him doing a major flip dive over the buckles and just skidding on his back was gruesome. There was flayed skin hanging off. The match was okay, decent energy, but the actual moments and implications were the best.

TL: It wouldn’t be a professional wrestling match if all the available black guys in the fed didn’t wrestle in the same match together. Legit surprised Famous B didn’t come out with them. I’m all about the first few minutes of this match, where Fox and Killshot try their usual stuff but their injuries catch up and it becomes what I wanted most in this match: A Pindar showcase! He has a great little run here during the Lizard control segment, and then when Mack gets the hot tag and the tecnicos figure it out, it gets good. That shot of Fox’s back was absolutely disgusting. Pindar taking the fall was bleh because he looked the best in the match on the Lizard side, but he also made the finishing run look good. And yeah, it’s nice to see tecnicos do something cool without consequence. This was definitely a match where the moments were more important than the sum of its parts, but there was a good layout and everyone was used well. Surprised Drago didn’t get much of a showcase here. Fox is an insane person for going out there and doing his usual stuff with his back like that basically 24 hours after that match. Killshot was at least smart enough to take flip bumps onto his stomach most of the time.

3. Ladder Match: Son of Havoc vs. Pentagon Dark

ER: This isn't very good, and has some absolutely brutal prop set up. The only interesting moment of prop set up is when Pentagon starts throwing a bunch of ladders into the ring and Striker brings up the Public Enemy match. Vampiro compares this moment to when he was in FMW with Terry Funk, and I genuinely don't think that Funk and Vampiro were ever around each other before WCW. I don't think Vampiro ever wrestled in FMW, and I don't think Funk ever wrestled in WAR, really don't think they would have ever been on tour with a company together, before WCW. But then again he has already stated that he got to see Misawa/Kawada matches while on tour with All Japan and...that never happened. The match reaches peak crazy when Pentagon delivers a package piledriver through opened chairs. It didn't lead to a finish. Pentagon proceeds to slowly set up several ladders, and it's completely interminable because the whole time you knew it wasn't going to lead to anything nearly as cool as Crazy Crusher vs. Hell Storm. And for a guy who is I guess spreading the devil's message of violence, Pentagon never actually feels very comfortable setting up all these ladders and tables. It leads to this silly moment where there is a ladder resting on the middle rope and within the rungs of an opened ladder, and he and Havoc are brawling slowly on it because it's rickety and they don't want to fall...but it's like 2 1/2 feet off the mat. This is no Bill Dundee hanging off a scaffold, this is more a red panda hanging off a low branch, and he's trying to recover, but he's just got his panda strength to work with, and eventually he falls...but it's like a 1 foot drop. This didn't work for me.

TL: Dark is gonna have to show me something here because after so much time giving him the benefit of the doubt and saying he’d bring it in a big match, this is the type of situation where he needs to show up. Vampiro bringing up tours of Japan he never went on goes into the JBL Honorary Hall of Fame right alongside “Riki Tenryu” and his drugged showdown with an inflated dinosaur he calls Godzilla during a WWE tour of Japan. Also, not a single ladder hit Havoc when Dark threw them in there, so that wasn’t even close to the Funk ECW chair stuff. Striker also makes an Art Vandelay joke. With as much as I’m talking about commentary, it should tell you what I think of this match. It’s literally setup spot after setup spot. Something happens, weak transition spot (they tried the Randy Orton/Evan Bourne RKO spot and it didn’t look good at all), guy sets something up. Rinse and repeat. Dark literally wrestles as if he’s not getting paid enough for this shit, and since I’m not getting paid at all for it, I’ll care just as much. For a match between two ultraviolent characters where one of them came up as a real-life backyarder, this was as anti-violent and plodding as anything you’d see on this show, but set up much like you'd imagine a backyard ladder match would be. You saw how the first night ended. You saw how the second night ended. I understand if the feeling was that they couldn’t top any of that, but at least go out and try. It’s the blowoff show. Literally no reason to hold anything back here. This was a hastily put together match but could have been much better than it had any right to be. As far as Dark is concerned, I’m out on him.

TL: Man alive, are they telegraphing what’s gonna happen to Puma here. I mean, if you read this site, pretty sure you are up to speed on current pro wrestling news, so it’s no secret what’s going to happen to Puma. If I was watching this when it aired not knowing what was going to happen, it wouldn’t have made me change my mind on Vampiro obviously looking to screw over Puma. It’s another part of this that I had watched previously in highlight form so I’m foggy on specifics, but we’ll see if my feelings change watching the finale.




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Saturday, March 17, 2018

Lucha Underground Season 3 Episode 35: Cien

ER: I cannot believe there has been 100 episodes of this show, and I really can't believe that I have officially written about 100 episodes of this show. My goodness that is a lot of words written about Lucha Underground, with 3 different people. Props to Tim for crossing this threshold with me.

TL: Happy to have been here for the handful I’ve done. Always loved the work Eric, Phil, Matt, and all the other contributors have done on the site. I am definitely stunned that this show made it to 100 episodes in a way. Makes me wonder how many other feds could do 100 episodes of wrestling with such huge variations of quality. Hell, CWF Mid-Atlantic is blowing this out of the water on a regular basis and they’re about to do episode 150.

Sexy Star/Fenix/Cage/Prince Puma vs. Taya/PJ Black/Johnny Mundo/Marty "The Moth" Martinez

ER: This match had a comical amount of "I make your partner do a move to you" goofy mousetrap offense, but I liked it. It was just a 6 minute atomicos match but had a lot to like with all the goofiness happening. I liked all the moments where Mundo uses Taya as operation human shield, like rushing to tag her in when Cage gets into the match, or blatantly throwing her right into a big Cage lariat so that he is in a better position to attack Cage. The double teams were all goofy but they fit well into the match just because they were pulled off seamlessly, with both Puma pulling out some ridiculous combos, a crazy spinkick out of something that started like an armdrag, a big springboard kick, plenty of fun bits. We get a couple good DDTs, both Moth and Puma really took them on the side of their heads, really outside of Moth having to bump around for Sexy Star this was plenty fun. Also looking forward to Crane/Cage if it ends up happening as more than just a backstage beatdown.

TL: So, this is some really basic quibbling with wrestling booking. Okay. You have Fenix in a blood feud with Marty that is building to an apuestas match. Marty starts off the match with Sexy Star. He shows ass and basically has to tumble to his corner for a tag because he can’t handle Sexy Star. So this means, with Fenix going to a standstill with PJ Black in the next section of this match…that Sexy is being booked stronger than all three of them? Really? I just wanted to expand on Eric’s point about Marty bumping around for her because it’s just one of those things that seems really out of place with all the stories they’re trying to tell in this match. When everyone pairs off into the feuds they’re in at the end, it’s really fun, and I dug Puma doing a gainer off Mundo’s springboard kick. Looked really sick. A good little match, if not something that felt rushed.

TL: I’m such a huge fan of the corny-ass backstage segments that LU has. It’s really amazing that they even exist in a universe where Being the Elite is also a thing. I’ll take this overacting over tongue-in-cheek inside references at wrestlers being better than “The establishment” any day of the week. Also, if it becomes a three-way between Muertes/Cage/Crane, I’m in. Just don’t give Crane a bat.

Dragon Azteca Jr. vs. Pentagon Dark

ER: They're keeping the matches to 6-7 minutes this episode, which keeps things fast and avoids bloat. You know you're likely not getting a great match, but you don't get guys working themselves into corners either. I thought this was really fun, even though I'm bearish on Pentagon he's still a really nice base for Azteca, and I loved all of Azteca's crazy height and balance he would display, every time Pentagon would toss him into the air. Him landing on his feet on the top was super impressive, and I loved him getting tossed up onto the stage and running back and immediately hitting a beautiful rana to the floor. Azteca hit a big skytwister press to the floor not long before that, and back in they did some nicely done sexy dance fighting. Pentagon would cut off Azteca when he got too cute (like making him pay for a handspring attempt by hitting a double stomp), and the package piledriver was nicely planted. Azteca gets launched a few times postmatch by Matanza, a sure curse when an employer knows how great you take big throw offense. This episode is nice and brisk.

TL: One of my favorite things in lucha when I first started watching it was Hector Garza’s tornillo. It was so amazingly graceful and also looked like it completely wiped you out when it landed. Azteca hits a great one here, mainly aided by the camera angle, but it also gave me a reason to talk about one of my favorite moves. This is better than most Pentagon matches this season because Azteca’s offense is good and Penta knows how to take it, and Penta can be a good transition guy. Azteca landing on top in an ode to early Rey stuff was awesome, as was Penta hitting the Fear Factor to finish off it. Matanza tossing around people never gets old.

Matanza vs. Rey Mysterio

ER: Good match, as you'd expect. Rey sticks and moves until Matanza sticks him, and then we get a nice long Matanza beatdown, slamming the back of Rey's head into various surfaces, clawing at his eyes, cutting him off with a nice straight leg big boot, Rey tries to tangle him in the ropes and Matanza keeps beating on him with Vader-like full arm blows. The Code Red was a nice comeback and then we go a classic Rey run, big springboard senton and legdrop, big DDT, Matanza gets a chair kicked into his face in nasty fashion a couple times (I wonder how hard front of his mask really is? It doesn't seem pliable but I'm not sure it's protective), and I love Matanza finally just taking Rey out at the knees with the chair. End run was big with a couple large Matanza throws, a nice missed charge into the post, but Rey moonsaulting into the Wrath of the Gods. This match didn't necessarily seem like a huge deal, which is a shame since you had without a doubt the biggest wrestling star in the company versus a murderer who has never been beaten in a straight match, but in a vacuum the two of them matched up predictably well.

TL: Rey’s barrage to start this was fantastic and really made the match have a sense of urgency that can sometimes be missing in LU. Of course, Matanza is a great base for Rey’s offense, including snapping over on a springboard rana with a tight window. The baseball slide Rey bump is one of my favorite lucha bumps ever, right up there with the Estrada bump. Matanza just slamming Rey into whatever he finds appealing is great stuff, just overpowering him in every way possible. The Code Red off the top was nasty as all hell and a great way to get Rey back into it. Why does Matanza need a chair, though???? As Eric said, he’s literally killed a guy. Like he needs a damn chair. The rotating German Suplex is still an awe-inspiring spot even though I’ve seen it done so many times. Cool finish and I liked that Cueto made sure Matanza won. I do think it was treated like a big deal, but it didn’t get the pageantry that you expect from a monumental episode since it was rushed into from the previous match. It was definitely worked like a big match, and I liked the postmatch beatdown with the chair more than the chair stuff during the match due to there being more intent there, but I’ll like anything these two do together, really.




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Sunday, February 11, 2018

Lucha Underground Season 3 Episode 30: Bloodlines

1. Paul London/Mala Suerte/Saltador vs. Ricky Mandel/Taya/PJ Black

ER: This is just the goofy mess it should have been. Rabbit Tribe kept trying a bunch of silly double teams, with some of them working and some not (which, due to their gimmick, some of their stuff really shouldn't work all the time), but they're approaching it the right way. I usually dislike the "man wrestler turned on by woman wrestler" spots, but I was amused by London diving to get in the way of a potential Taya bronco buster. Maybe it just felt like he fully committed to the spot, really gleefully wanting it. So I suppose charm and committment is the key to making assault funny! I dug Jack Evans' sign ("If I was in the match we would have won by now") and Mala Suerte hits a kind of tornillo dive from the apron over the ringpost. This was fine.

TL: Wait, did Striker seriously say about Paul London, “He took the pill that made him bigger?” Like, he accused him of doing steroids or something? And then he immediately redeems himself by dropping WINK MARTINDALE’S name, which I know popped Eric like it did me. Just wait till I help turn SC into a “High Rollers” blog. We’re really close to becoming a Supermarket Sweep blog, anyways. On to the match, which is indeed a Rabbit Tribe trios match. The aforementioned Taya corner spot sure is something. Jack Evans as a character in a Looney Tunes episode with his signs is right up my alley. Enjoyable to say the least, as Rabbit Tribe has found a way to make the goofiness work. In the postmatch skit, really wish Evans had his whiteboard with him.

2. Jeremiah Crane vs. Mil Muertes

ER: YES! This was the match I was waiting for. After hearing all season from people who attended the tapings that "this season was the craziest yet" I have now spent 29 episodes being mostly disappointed. And it wasn't due to high expectations, the action just seems nowhere near as good as the first season. This match felt like the closest we've come to the best brawls of the series. I just love Mil in these crowd brawls. He's bigger than the guys we typically see moving through the crowds, so these shots from above feel more like helicopter shots of Godzilla wrecking everything in his path. The match starts at the top of the temple steps and there might not be anybody better than Crane at violently flying through rubble. He can bring violence, but he's best at inviting violence onto his own person. Muertes throws him through the bleachers, brutally through the chairs, in a fun moment he flapjacks Crane on the stairs' handrail and Crane slides all the way down to the floor bent at the waist. Muertes is a beast, and as he beat Crane with meaty fists I actually liked Stryker pointing out "this is why middleweights typically don't fight heavyweights". Crane goes for his bottom ropes tope and Muertes literally doesn't budge, Crane just bounces off of him. We get a bunch of chairs involved including hard shots to the side of the head and nasty spills into them. In an absolutely nuts spot Crane sets up a table on the floor and takes too long leering at Catrina, allowing Mil to come crashing to the floor with a spear. And the spear doesn't actually break the table! Crane goes flying and Muertes just bulls grossly into the table, later slamming Crane through the bent up table. Crane doesn't go down easy and I wouldn't expect him to and didn't want him to, and we get an appropriate amount of violence. This was everything I wanted out of it.

TL: So this match is supposed to be one of the highlights of this season from what I heard coming in, but that’s really all I heard. No specifics. This has also had a nice little build and is the first thing I saw when starting up these reviews with Eric. The fact it starts with Mil jumping Crane from behind during his entrance makes it stand out immediately. Then, they just absolutely beat the crap out of each other from that moment on, and as much as I’m hot and cold on Crane, when he decides to bump big and sell, he’s as good as anyone on the planet. This match basically requires it since Mil wants revenge for the cheap win earlier in the season, so Crane is from underneath and takes a great beating. The bottom rope tope suicida where Crane just bounces off Muertes is one of the best spots I’ve seen in quite a while. Muertes no-selling the spit chop gets a pop from me, and an even bigger pop when Crane readies the cannonball only for Muertes to freight train him. I mean, this is an absolute mauling by Muertes. Considering what we had seen Crane do in the tourney matches before this, it’s as if the bookers made this match to force him to sell. The best thing this match does is reinforce that Crane just keeps coming forward, but you just can’t do that against Mil, and when he goes down from the chair shots, it’s a big deal considering what Crane had absorbed all match. Then, as Eric mentioned with the table, Crane got a bit too happy he was finally on offense and took that nasty bump through the table off the spear. And then another powerbomb through the half-broken table. Crane’s comeback with the choke and then the cannonball through the table was well earned, but good lord almighty, THIS is the Crane I want. Mil Muertes is amazing. One of the best matches in LU history, and while the All Night Long match was definitely surprising in a way that made it better than it probably was, this match is right there with it, maybe even more so.

TL: FBI agent coming into Cueto’s office and it ISN’T Burt Macklin? No dice.

3. Texano vs. Pentagon Dark

ER: This was fine considering the dropped stock of both guys (for my personal viewing), and I'm happy Pentagon advanced as I actually could have seen something ridiculous like Texano advancing to the finals. The Famous B stuff feels far too distracting considering they have seemingly been involving Pentagon in "serious" angles. So having him out in a serious fight with Brenda screaming at ringside for most of the match feels off. But I liked the horseshoe finish and Pentagon made the punch count. The arm breaking stuff is pretty stupid at this point, and having Pentagon break Brenda's arm to a huge babyface reaction makes a lot of the "under-advantaged women fighting for themselves" stuff they've done seem pretty pointless (if it hadn't already felt that way). Sexy Star has taken up too much time on TV being "a superhero to abused girls everywhere", and a bunch of dudes still jumping up and down while Brenda screams in pain seems like we went through countless bad segments for nothing. But I guess it's kewl because Pentagon has zero fear? I'm glad he was able to finally stand up to Brenda.

TL: I guess they had to figure out a way for Texano to basically go 50/50 with Dark considering how he was booked in the tourney, but this match didn’t really do much of anything for me considering they had to get Famous B and Brenda involved. Have no idea why Pentagon of all people needs to be winning a match with a foreign object, but that’s what this match ended with. (I agree that it was a good shot, though.) Just one of those matches that advanced nothing. Postmatch was disturbing and rendered Sexy Star pointless, so at least that happened.

TL: Eric absolutely no-selling the amulet stuff with Katrina that’s obviously a rip-off of Legends of the Hidden Temple is beyond me. Considering he’s the only person I know who loved that show more than me, I would have at least expected a Purple Parrots reference or something.


ER: We are now slowly transitioning into a Legends of the Hidden Temple/Supermarket Sweep blog. Gotta do a crowd opinion poll and see how many people would be down for show reports. We can count how many awkward high fives occur between the pre-teen members of the opposite sex, chart the disappointment on partners faces when they get stuck with a dummy partner on the Steps of Knowledge, report on Kirk Fogg's improv abilities as he stretches for time while interviewing contestants about their crystal horse collection....this feels like a dangerous suggestion.




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Saturday, January 20, 2018

Lucha Underground Season 3 Episode 26: A Fenix to a Flame

ER: Okay, so the first round of the most innovative single elimination #1 contender tournament in wresting history was kind of a bust. It had a memorable Paul London performance and I liked Pentagon/Argenis. That's...not a lot to come out of 4 weeks and 16 matches. Here's hoping we get some burners in the late rounds.

TL: Stoked that Vampiro doesn’t have Arau’s name to mispronounce now. Truly feels like a step forward in the commentary of the promotion.

1. Jeremiah Crane vs. Taya

ER: Really fun match, felt like they played the battle of the sexes at just the right level. Taya didn't take 75% of the match like every awful Sexy Star vs. Male matches, and what she did take felt earned. Her and Crane shouldn't be going tit for tat, and my favorite moment was the way Taya bailed and crumbled during a slap exchange. Once I saw them squaring up for a strike exchange I was fully prepared to eyeroll, but they handled it great with Taya slapping him around and then Crane blitzing her with far harder smacks and she immediately goes down. Taya can really take a mean beating, Crane didn't have to hold back, and there was some wild stuff: Crane hits his low tope suicida, cannonballs her into the chairs, Crane kicks her (har har). Taya gets in some logical comebacks, with a big furry boot to the balls making the most sense to block the facewash. She was nuts for taking some of this stuff, and the match benefitted greatly for it.

TL: Man, forgot where JC was billed from, as “The Last House on the Left” just doesn’t jive. Also, a fan in the crowd has a Rick Knox t-shirt, which, well, what ref t-shirts would you want to own? Tommy Young? Joe Higuchi? Definitely not a Hebner. Definitely not a Red Shoes. Anyways, this match begins on the outside a lot like the Killshot match and Taya already sells the beating way better than Killshot, especially considering she slapped him to start. I also like how Taya came back by outsmarting Crane with the balcony work, because in essence, the way this match is booked, she being a part of the Worldwide Underground means she can have some kind of tactical advantage. And the counter off the running boot is FANTASTIC. Took me a moment to figure out what happened, but man, this is a great match. The other part is that even though Taya is tactically sound, she’s also vain, which leads to her downfall in some ways. Don’t like her last minute counter after the powerbomb for the nearfall, but otherwise, I REALLY liked this match, and Taya’s selling and facial expressions were fantastic. Feel like she’s underrated, but that might be me being in the wrong circle, too.

TL: Aerostar being a time traveler makes me wonder why they don’t do some type of gimmick where he’s the LU bookie. I mean, we’re talking about a fed run by a dude who has hidden several murders in his life, including cops and government officials. You can’t tell me Aerostar being the LU bookie would be beneath this promotion.

2. Mil Muertes vs. Paul London

ER: Okay, 2nd round matches are delivering just fine so far. London pulls out all the stops against Muertes, Muertes gets to come off invincible by surviving tons of London's biggest moves and run-ins from his flunkies. I will say that after all that, the flatliner is a pretty weak "death move", but it's a testament to Muertes that he can make some 1999 offense like a spear/flatliner combo seem plausible as a death move. London is almost a decade removed from WWE and bumping as big as ever. And the rolling heel kick out of the corner is lands rougher than most flashy kicks. London superkicks Muertes around the entire ring, and why is LU so damn inconsistent with their one SLAP sound effect. London's first 5 kicks had the exact same sound effect, but then they don't use it on the 6th? Why use it on almost every strike, but then skip one? It already sounds ridiculous, but it sounds far more ridiculous to make every strike sound exactly the same, and then suddenly have one delivered in dead silence. The multiple superkicks are kind of silly, but I like how London kept stumbling his way into delivering them, and loved the payoff of Mil finally catching one and clotheslining his head off. London can still hit the SSP better than maybe anyone, and I like the Tribe's interference made it seem like London could feasibly advance. 2nd round is definitely 2/2 so far.

TL: I’m here for the cat and mouse game and Paul London taking crazy ass bumps for Mil’s power offense. The cat and mouse game was cute. The flip bump off the tackle was nuts. I actually buy London being on something to start the match, only for Mil to whoop him up so much that he comes to a bit and that’s how he makes his comebacks. Striker makes a “Dick Trickle” joke and I groan. I actually dug the London Ode to the Massie Brothers superkick barrage on the outside for its goofiness. The mushroom stomp is also an awesome move that I wish other folks would use more often. The Mil chokeslam is suitably gnarly here. And then the spear and the Flatliner (which London, a crazy person, takes like a DDT) finishes a fun match. Muertes rules.

TL: Never thought we’d actually see a cuckold situation on LU with the Famous B/Texano stuff but here we are. I mean, it's not 100% confirmed that Brenda and B are an item, but c'mon, if you're B, you have to at least try, right? Brenda’s right though: Texano’s dull.

3. Marty the Moth Martinez vs. Fenix

ER: Another winner, even with the...acting...abilities of Melissa Santos on display towards the end. Fenix made up for the size difference by picking shots, landing big kicks (a spinkick right under the chin and a full extension superkick looked great), big dives, and using speed to make Moth miss him and bump. Marty takes a predictably Marty bump to the floor after charging and missing, flipping through the ropes and splatting on the floor. I definitely like Moth more as a guy taking offense, as he's big but lands hard, and takes nice appropriate flops and tumbles off big strikes. His offense could be a bit more simple, there's always a lot of steps to his slams, but they always land big. He hits a german early and could use more simple suplexes, instead we get a crucifix into a Gory special into a dominator that sees him also take a back bump and land Fenix onto his knees...it reads as complicated as it sounds, but the end result usually looks good. I also like how Moth is always in character during pinfalls, kind of oozing onto his opponent. Finish is silly with Santos stopping more Mariposa interference like a mother telling her kids to behave at the market ("Stop it! You stop it!") but this match was killer. An easy 3/3 for the 2nd round so far.

TL: I get that Santos is cute and there’s a bit of a following there with LU fans but she’s not doing it for me in this little angle. Marty’s schizo athleticism plays up here with a guy like Fenix, who just does crazy things for fun. Mariposa is a great second here, which shouldn’t come as any surprise. This is also some really good traditional rudo work by Martinez with the mask ripping and just general nastiness. Fenix has some great comebacks, and that springboard spinning back kick in the corner was absolutely ridiculous and worthy of the ridiculous sound effect. Fenix also must have read my review of the last match because he does his own mushroom stomp variation and I pop like crazy for it. Mothra is convoluted as all hell but Fenix took it very nastily. In fact, I like a lot of Marty’s indyriffic offense looks because he looks like a killer against a guy like Fenix. Santos only being able to say “Stop it!” is basically Skinemax/Hallmark Channel-level acting and it somehow leads to Fenix moving on. The postmatch payoff makes sense since Santos got involved, but as far as Marty using a fork is concerned, he really needs to watch some Abby in Puerto Rico for proper usage.

ER: This was my favorite episode in some time, the wrestling all delivered and the flow was good. This actually got me interested in the tourney, which I had not been until now.

TL: So this seems like a tourney where LU had 20 guys they wanted to showcase but didn’t want to hand out a bunch of byes. Which means that after the first round, it was going to get good. Pro wrestling tournaments are hard to mess up, and it looks like this one is hitting its stride. Like I said a few shows ago though: They’re really telegraphing the winner in a lot of ways, but at the same time, I’m intrigued to see how they get there and see if they play with those expectations going forward. It’s the least they can do and they’re doing it well.

Also, Eric and I are totally in sync in this show in a scary way and we wrote our reviews separately, so that goes to show you just how good we thought this episode was after quite the barrage of stinkers.

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Saturday, December 23, 2017

Lucha Underground Season 3 Episode 24: Macho Madness

TL: I want to want something in my life as much as Catrina wants a giant cup with ribbons on it. Also, I’m 1000% certain Vampiro never pronounced Sergio Arau’s name right once in all the shows he played.

1. Veneno vs. Mil Muertes

ER: Man, actual Veneno would have been so much more interesting in LU than Ricky Reyes under a mask. You've seen more violent Muertes squashes. I wonder who designed the cool Veneno mask for a gimmick they don't use?

TL: Man, I’m such a huge fan of Muertes absolutely mauling folks. Yes, there are better squashes, but it’s still worth it to watch him squash folks. He absolutely destroys Veneno Reyes in a way that seems like a waste of three minutes to some, but for me, in the year 2017, our Year of the Sprint, would watch 100 times more. That chokeslam with a twist that he throws looked nasty, like a uranage by the throat, and segues right into the Flatliner. Very much here for Mil Muertes squash matches.

2. Paul London vs. Vibora

ER: "Luchasaurus" has an admittedly better ring to it than "Lucha Lance Hoyt" but the end result is the same. London is an absolute psycho in this, really working vintage death wish London. He plasters Vibora with a couple stiff baseball slide dropkicks, eventually does a bonkers trust fall dive that Vibora has no clue how to catch, so London just topes en reversa to all the way to the floor, almost braining himself on Melissa Santos' seat on the way down. Rabbit Tribe holding Vibora's legs to prevent him from getting back in the ring was a nice way to limit his one on one ring time, and London will be much more interesting in later rounds than Vibora.

TL: Man. I’m definitely not here for a Luchasaurus singles match. I’m also really not here for a Paul London comedy match. Then London is out here bumping big for Vibora and I’m at least enjoying this. The Trust Fall absolutely got me into it due to its nuttiness, and at least they got the booking right with the finish. Alright, I’ll take it. Definitely looking forward to seeing how crazy London is going to bump for Muertes, and Muertes is gonna absolutely maul London. Should be fun.

3. Taya vs. Joey Ryan

ER: Have they dropped the investigation into Dario? I haven't seen any really bad cop vignettes in who knows how many episodes. Have they been doing an Instagram-only storyline tracking all of the movements made against Cueto? This was a perfectly fine first round match, and I thought Taya was really good at aggressively going after Ryan. Her punch/chop combo in the corner looked really good, and I don't think it needed the extra sound sweetening they gave her. Ryan's superkick to knock her off the apron looked good too, and she was smart for going after him with double stomps. Good match, and this was one of the few matches in the first round where I wasn't sure who would advance, and I'd much rather see Taya in the 2nd round than Ryan.

TL: Should have known they would have gone intergender with Joey Ryan. Now, yeah, this is a fine match, but has there been a deep dive on referee Justin Borden? Dude has two AA’s, two BA’s, three Master’s and a Ph.D. And he’s a pro wrestling referee!!! I just finished my first and only Master’s and am finding it hard to get a job and this guy is out here with all of the degrees he can keep himself warm with (Man, College Dropout was really good). And Joey asks him to count faster??? He’s a terrible undercover cop for not knowing how smart Borden was that he’s deliberate in his count. Calling BS on Joey’s cop credentials. Maybe if he got a BA in criminal justice. Anyways, Joey knows how to play off the preconceived gender notions very well and this is at least entertaining. Finish is a bit clunky, but nice to see Taya move on.

ER: I think I'm the only one who thinks these "pure sports build" Rey/Mundo promos have been really lame. It's already fast forward material for me as I cannot stand Michael Schiavello, but I think this kind of "real sports" build is completely pointless in Lucha Underground. They've established a weird fantasy universe where several of their wrestlers have recently murdered people, some people are actual evil time traveling spirits, several people are not 100% human, that trying to do an MMA style tale of the tape build comes off entirely silly to me. But, I really liked Crane's locker room beatdown of Mil Muertes!

TL: Lucha masks and suits will never not be cool. The beatdown was good, but hearing Callahan say “She’s mine!” after what’s been alleged against him is, well, problematic to say the least. Real sport build really needed Cage with his power glove beating up the interviewer. Absolutely over this and I can’t believe I was into this two episodes ago.

4. Jeremiah Crane vs. Killshot

ER: I don't really know what to say about this match. I got a lot more time than every other first round match so far, and they certainly made it their business to do everything they could with that extra time. They did a lot. LU used that one SLAP sound effect they have probably 35 times. So you know guys were hitting each other, because the SLAP sound told us. The problem I had with most of this revolved around Killshot. He's clearly athletic, and can do things that I wouldn't ever be able to do, but his entire tone never changes. He works the first second of the match the same way he works the last second. He doesn't sell, he merely occasionally lets the other guy do moves. He's not having a conversation with his opponent, he's the guy waiting for his opponent to finish talking so it's his turn to talk again. So while it looks awesome when Crane runs all the way around the ring and plasters Killshot into the wall and through several chairs with a cannonball, you also know it's not going to do anything to slow Killshot down (unless it's during those moments where he merely goes into shutdown mode before being reactivated). If instead of making him an army sharpshooter they had made him into a Six Million Dollar Man rebuilt half-robot, then his style would make a lot more sense. Crane eventually gets the pin by dumping Killshot on his head with an underhook piledriver/powerbomb, but Killshot bounced off his head a few times in the match already, and took a few nasty kicks to the back of the head. I'm not sure why this particular shot hurt him any more than those other shots. And I still don't understand what his finisher is. He jumps off the top and lands with his feet on either side of his opponent. I just watched 15 minutes of him landing strikes and suplexes and things that looked much more painful and all somehow had the same SLAP sound effect, so I truly don't know what that move is supposed to be, or why it is somehow worse than the other two dozen moves he successfully landed.

TL: The first six minutes of this match take place entirely on the outside and is done in a way that never got me into the match. When you trade dives like that to the point where none of them mattered, I have no idea how you’re supposed to convince me anything else matters in the match. Really over any spit-based offense from Crane, too. He’s no Haruka Eigen, damn it. And yeah, after that Cannonball, how is Killshot even up and doing any offense with force behind it? And then all his athletic based offense? It’s just spots for spots worth. He sells no pain. They only sell until the next spot, then everything is all right. Both guys hit their stuff as crisp as ever with as much force behind it that they’re essentially superhuman. The crowd eats it up because it’s a bunch of cool looking stuff, but the match itself had zero substance and really played into the worst possible impulses of both guys. When Vampiro talks about Crane selling his jaw and then he basically just goes over and grabs a Dragon Sleeper with suddenness two seconds later, you’ve lost me. It’s amazing to think that Crane thinks he’s a top-flight wrestler at this point when he’s had the Finlay matches under his belt and decided to go seemingly the opposite way of what made those matches great. Yeah, a lot of that was due to Finlay, but man, at least there was attention to detail there. Here, there was none. Strickland didn’t sell a damn thing.

TL: Wait, why does Muertes get the lights out effect and you can’t even let Cage pound his damn Power Glove into the mat??? Unreal.

ER: I don't know who Son of Madness is, but I know an impressive beard when I see it, and the guy has a legendary beard. I REALLY hope we build to a Loser Shaves His Beard match. It writes itself.

TL: Okay, please forgive my ignorance, but it literally took me three seasons of this show to realize that with the Son of Havoc/Madness stuff and them being from the “Open Road” that it’s a play on Sons of Anarchy. Man I feel dumb.



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Friday, October 14, 2016

Lucha Underground Season 3 Episode 4: Brothers in Broken Arms

MD: I am ahead of Eric now, which is frustrating because I can't just crib off of his notes. That's not to say that Lucha Underground is work, but you definitely have to be in the right mindset. This started with Sexy Star and Dario talking. I love that they call atomicos matches atomicos matches. Why doesn't CMLL ever run them? Why didn't they run Ultimo Guerrero, Gran Guerrero, Euforia, and Niebla Roja vs Rush, Sombra, Mascara, and Marco (or Naito) when they could have? I'm really not looking forward to Mundo vs Star one-on-one when that happens, but at least they're building to it.

ER: FYI you guys, Sexy Star was really bad in that opening segment. Just thought you'd be interested in knowing that. Her line reading always sounds like she's phonetically screaming English, as if she's not actually saying real words, just jaggedly combining sounds together to form objects similar to words. Her kick to the locker door didn't even convince the locker that it had been kicked.

1. Sinestro de la Muerte vs. Prince Puma

MD: Way, way, way too competitive. Apparently Dr. Wagner, Jr. is the only one who can properly squash anyone anymore. This match was supposed to be Puma looking strong against Muertes' crony, to the point that Catrina was going to kill him. I'm not saying it should have been a total squash and it did get across the idea that Puma was more intense now, but Sinestro took way too much of this. Striker's commentary was too staged too, as if he was expecting Mil to run in and was just waiting for the cue. Puma doing the flatliner was cute and I hope it leads to Mil doing the 630.

ER: Decent enough WorldWide squash to pace us until Puma's match with Muertes, until it suddenly didn't turn into a squash and Sinestro got a lot of offense. I thought the opening punch exchange was awful, looked like two guys having a hoedown. Once we got into move trading I dug it, both guys worked fast sequences well and Sinestro was adept at taking Puma's offense. I liked this missed interference spot by Muertes, leading to Puma finishing off Sinestro while glaring Muertes down. The wild dive after the match was great.

MD: Dario's "I'm kind of a big deal" nameplate is awesome. I wonder what the story behind it is. I bet that it's Mascarita Sagrada's secret santa present for him. Passive aggressive Castro is better than scared Mr. Cisco acting. Dario using Pentagon Dark like Teddy Long would use the Undertaker was good too.

2. Cortez Castro vs. Pentagon Dark

MD: So Puma can't get a squash against the guy that they're killing off (literally), but Castro gets completely squashed by Pentagon despite needing to be a quasi-protagonist in all of this police drama stuff. Beats me, though I'll admit Pentagon needed to look strong. I would have flipped the layout of those first two matches.

ER: See, they CAN do squash matches correctly! Here's the obligatory Phil throwback spot where he points out them running the same angle and same match on the same show. I have no idea how I'm supposed to feel about Castro at this point. Am I supposed to be rooting for him? They're not giving me a whole lot to root for. Also noticed JR Kratos just sitting in the crowd, not really reacting to Pentagon's promo. But I loved one guy's reaction to Pentagon saying that in the ring, he doesn't even respect his own mother. Some guy just had total disbelief on his face.

3. Aerostar, Fenix, Drago & Sexy Star vs. Johnny Mundo, Jack Evans, PJ Black & Taya

MD: The best multi-man lucha tags all have a central storyline running through them. Here, it should be to set up Sexy Star and Mundo? That's not promising and frankly, it barely matters because they don't focus on it anyway. They started with Taya and Star instead, with Taya having her share of chants. That's not too surprising given how thoroughly into her character she is. All of the beginning of this was goofy. At one point PJ Black was fighting against superior tecnico odds which is generally not something your heel should be doing? Then they had some heat on Sexy Star, her getting the hot tag to show up Mundo, a fun comeback with Aerostar looking awesome on dives (again), and Mundo making sure Sexy Star lost in the end, continuing their program. I'm not sure where Eric is going to fall on this, but it felt like a mess to me. The destination forwarded the program but the journey was all over the place.

ER: I thought this was fine. The guys I expected to look good looked good, and the people I expected to stink, stunk. Sexy Star looked terrible throughout. This was not unexpected. I was hoping her interactions would be limited to one or two opponents, because she has a knack of making everybody else look stupid by waiting around for her. So, we had a lot of guys waiting for her to get in the right position, or wait far too long in one place for her to finally do a move. The match needed more Fenix, my personal favorite in the group. And when he was in I thought he looked awesome. Evans made me laugh with his neverending string of handsprings leading to a tag out. Even Striker made me laugh right after when he said "Some of Jack's best ring work". Mundo and Black rotated between throwing out something real good, and something overly rehearsed. At one point Black threw a kick about 2 feet to the right of Drago, clearly because it was just meant to be swept aside. I hate when those kind of cracks show. Drago had some nice glue moments, coming in low and fast on dropdowns and keeping a real snug and fast headscissors on Black. Aerostar always seems like he makes up flying moves as he goes and I love him for that. Sometimes they look a little dodgy, but it's worth it for the spectacular moments. So yeah, this was kind of a mess, but the mess all came from expected sources.

MD: I'll let Eric talk about soul stealing and broken necks (or let him not talk about it).

ER: I mean, this match was one of Sinestro's more dominant performances, so it's weird for them to so casually be done with him now. There have probably been 10 lousy Sinestro performances that lead to him not getting his neck broken, so it's weird they just now realized the last of their lightning babies was a dud. I'm unsure how much strength you can gain by stealing the soul of losers, but at least they had the decency to break his neck so he doesn't have to go through life not having convenience store doors open for him. It's possible Muertes will just trade it for some pogs anyway.

4. Dragon Azteca Jr. vs. Chavo Guerrero

MD: Azteca gets credit for selling the arms early on. People sure recover from Pentagons' broken arm treatment quickly so it was nice to see some lingering aftereffects. I'm always irrationally glad that Rey has his "Jr." back. Look, this was all fine and everyone played their respective roles well, but when the most memorable part of a match is Vampiro, on commentary, babbling on about haunted houses and Aztec warriors, then maybe there's something lacking in the match.

ER: I liked this more than Matt, mainly because I thought Chavo looked great. He's probably the most undeserving guy who gets dumped on by fans of the show, and I think he's mostly delivered throughout his LU run. This match may have failed if the goal was to make Azteca look like he actually deserves and has a shot against Pentagon, but at least it continued to confirm how good Chavo can be. All his mat stuff looked good, his clothesline out of the corner was great, really he was awesome at steamrolling Azteca. Again, not sure it's in their best interest to have Azteca steamrolled, but I didn't mind.

(neither of us mention Black Lotus and her ninjas)


COMPLETE LUCHA UNDERGROUND EPISODE GUIDE




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Monday, October 10, 2016

Lucha Underground Season 3 Episode 3: Ultimate Opportunities

MD: I liked the opening scene with Azteca, Rey, and Chavo. Both the Casita and the rolling half crab were shot well for something like this. I get why Rey wouldn't want Azteca to go after Pentagon. I don't what bigger challenge Rey thinks they have though.

1. Matanza vs. The Mack

ER: Fun big man match up, and LU does big man go go go matches better than anyone. There's a match floating around of these two a year ago, and they go a little too long and both guys kinda run out of gas. This is a nice edited down version of that, so we get a couple big bruisers going at it with the help of an edit bay, and it's better for it. At one point Mack chops Matanza across the face and Matanza responds with a headbutt to his chest. I dug the hints on commentary that Matanza's mask might be loaded. "What's that thing made of?" Loaded mask is one of my favorite gimmick items. I liked Mack going for a second silly stunner, getting caught by Matanza and then we get that slowwwww deadlift German which I will never not love. Frog splash hitting knees > Tour of the Islands (Tour of the Temple?) is a satisfying ending. The season has begun with Matanza far more vulnerable, which completely tosses out all of last season, but makes for a more workable character.

MD: Bombs upon bombs upon bombs. If WWE bought up Lucha Underground, they could run a Super-heavyweight Bruiserweight classic and the matches could probably be worked almost exactly the same as the CWC was. I'm not sure if that's a good thing in general, but it makes for an entertaining trainwreck, and in this case, an entertaining sprint. They did the usual good job in protecting Matanza while not having it be a squash by having Mack ambush him (he's more vulnerable but they always give a reason). The best part of this though was when Matanza hit that dangling pumphandle exploder suplex thing and Dario shouted "Break his neck. Next time, vertical. For the neck." If we're grading outside managers on syntax, Dario wins. I do really like how Wrath of the Gods can come out of nowhere and just end a match.

ER: Whoaaaaaaaaa. There is a LOT to unpack in these two last segments. And both of these are among the most entertaining LU non-wrestling segments of all time. The Bagel Bites ad. What can be said about this? Havoc and Sagrada hanging out together in Havoc's basement....."apartment".....Havoc clearly hanging out in jammy pants, and then Havoc's mom interrupts the hang sesh with their favorite snack, Bagel Bites! And then we end on Sagrada saying "Thank you, Mrs. Havoc!" With the delivered-with-a-straight-face "Mrs. was my mother's name. Call me Linda." And then we get a nice little Taya/Mundo/Dario segment with Taya showing her loyalty AND getting to correct Dario that PJ Black is actually, in fact, a DAREwolf. Duh. Great couple minutes of non wrestling right there.

MD: As endearing as Son of Havoc and Sagrada and Bagel Bites may be, I think that they did a very solid job building Son of Havoc up between the finale and the premiere and this is two steps backwards. In other vignette news, Taya was great interacting with Dario, pointing out the coke, sure, but with the great "Actually, he's a darewolf" line too.

2. Texano vs. Cage

MD: Texano feels like such a non-factor in the promotion now. Santos sure seems excited about announcing Cage for some reason. This, to me, felt like weightless go-go-go action. Cage focused on the neck to some degree but it wasn't even worth the announcers pointing out because the match didn't call for Texano to sell it. Dario came out after the match to announce this as a best of five series to kill time. Texano, having lost, was happier about that than either Cage or I am.

ER: Since Phil isn't watching anymore, this feels like a good time to bring up his regular complaint of "this fed really loves to book similar matches on the same show. We already opened with a power guys sprint so it's weird to have one right after". Match wasn't very good, either. Texano really is a total zero in LU. I'm sure there are many viewers who have no clue he's any kind of deal in Mexico. I like Matt's use of the word "weightless", because as I was watching this I was thinking about how nothing they did had any weight to it. It was like that Eric Bana Hulk movie, with Hulk just jumping and bouncing around off things. The weight was wrong. Obviously they were in there doing the moves, but they were both selling things like Petey Williams. But lucky us, we'll get to see 4 more chances to get it right!!!

MD: I have absolutely no idea who Ricky Mandel is or why he wants Dario's cool pictures.

ER: Mandel is returning from having his heart ripped out as the least member of the worst stable in LU, the Disciples of Death. Dude's got nothing to lose, may as well just sip a soda and flip through some cool Dario pictures.

3. Aerostar, Drago & Fenix vs. Jack Evans, PJ Black & Taya

MD: I thought they did a pretty good job mixing a Lucha Underground style spotfest trios match with all of the Jack Evans character stuff. I thought PJ Black made for a solid base for Aerostar in particular. I loved the spot where Aerostar evaded a Black corner charge by bounding up onto the ropes and then shifted around and hit a diving armdrag. They also had the great spot to end the match where Black tried to springboard in and Aerostar springboarded from the other corner and caught him with a rana, that was absolutely made by Black's stupid Darewolf scream.

I could probably make ten gifs of petulant Jack Evans but I won't do that to Eric; people should at least check out the goofy entrance though. I love the interactions between the three of them. His reactions to everything were great. It made a nice through story in the match to switch things up (which was good since we've had a lot of bombs and spots on the show already). I thought the payoff was a little frustrating as he just shrugged it off to be where he needed to be to catch dives at the end. I did like how the post match beatdown and save tied everything together. Logical booking is the best.

ER: I thought this was pretty nothing. A lot of guys seemed to be arriving too early at their marks, and there were some weird moments where guys seemed like they were holding way back against Taya. Jack Evans looks like crossfit Necro Butcher so I am in love. His schtick was plenty amusing here and I thought it played great with the team. Drago seemed a step behind, but Aerostar made up for that with a few fun Aerostar-doing-Aerostar moments that Matt covered nicely. This whole thing just felt way too scant, especially for the two major trios teams in the fed. Seems like all the trios teams are way underperforming, especially when compared to the first season. They all have moments you can point to, but none of them have been clicking.

And I wouldn't have minded Jack Evans reactions gifs. Not one bit. Matt's trying to blame me for not wanting them. Don't make me the bad guy, Matt.

MD: The Rey as special ref who wants to be loyal to his apprentice but doesn't want him to win and face Pentagon deal is actually pretty clever. It's the sort of shades of grey booking you don't get in wrestling nearly as much as you should.


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Wednesday, September 28, 2016

Lucha Underground Season 3 Episode 1: Wheel of Misfortune

ER: Loved this season cold open just as much as last season's. Dario doing pull-ups, Honky Tonk Man saying "...one giant key..." when giving back Dario's possessions, and then the gift Lorenzo Lamas gives when he says "all charges are dropped". This hopefully means no more cop segments, but it also means that we all had to sit through those embarrassing cop segments with a 4 word wave of the hand to write it off. And apparently Dario is now under Dr. Claw's thumb.

MD: I wish they'd use guys like Honky more in these roles. Part of me wonders if we're supposed to think this is a reality where Honky Tonk Man doesn't exist as a wrestler or if he just ended up a cop somehow. I'm sure Matt Striker's referenced him 2.43 times in the history of the show or something. Thankfully, my suspension of disbelief was never active in any of the cop stuff. It feels too early for the reset button on bringing Dario back. That's my big problem with this. That was the big moment to end season 2 and it's already undone within the first few seconds of season 3. If nothing else, it meant it was a waste of that moment.

1. Matanza vs. Son of Havoc

ER: I wonder if the wheel was gimmicked or not. Fans were way into Havoc by end of last season and he's really become one of the top tecnicos in the fed. Though I can't decide whether or not it was a good idea to give him to Matanza this early in the season. They could be feeding him to Matanza, only to build him up for a rematch later in the season. But - as Matt had pointed out - this season was supposed to be a continuation of Season 2, so it plays weird to have Havoc get robbed of his "unique opportunity" at the very end of Season 2, only to get a title shot in the first match of season 3. Match itself didn't do much for me. Havoc's light offense didn't look that imposing against Matanza, and Matanza has gone from a thing impervious to pain, to someone who sells for the first 80% of the match before making his short comeback. The biggest guys in the fed got all their finishers no sold during his debut, but now Pentagon and even Havoc are practically dominating him. Havoc was at least good at keeping Matanza on his toes, but I just don't buy his offense keeping down the previously invincible Matanza. Did anyone think Havoc had a chance at the title here?

MD: I'm with Eric on this. Havoc could have been thoroughly elevated coming out of Ultima Lucha 2 if they gave him a few smaller feuds and some wins. On the other hand, this could be part of the broader narrative of him falling and climbing back, but maybe that's the wrong story for a guy who needs to be established just a little more. They put themselves into a catch-22 of sorts with this, as Havoc had to look at least a little strong but Matanza had just come off of selling a ton for Pentagon and needed to look absolutely dominant just as much. It all felt lose-lose to me. I do love the idea of the wheel though. It's a great story engine for this sort of episodic show.

ER: Really loved Dario in the segment with Mundo's gang. This guy gets it. He does not, however, get me, as I keep having to see Sexy Star matches.

2. Taya vs. Sexy Star

ER: Sexy Star gonna keep on Sexy Starring. Slow, plodding match with an unimaginative finish. It was mostly Taya administering a slow beatdown until her boys interfered, with the interference backfiring and leading to a Sexy Star roll up win. Star's running knees off the apron looked good, but Star gave Taya next to nothing to work with here. She looked like she was moving in slow motion. She ran the ropes the way someone might before their match, to test the rope elasticity, get a feel for the ring. Something tells me Star will never get a feel for the ring. Best part of the match was Vampiro going on about Johnny Smith, and Striker trying to correct him by saying Johnny Saint, and the ensuing argument with Vampiro saying "I'm right about this". The argument had nothing to do with anything, but it was an amusing real moment between the two of them.

MD: Again, my favorite thing about Lucha Underground is that it's a TV show with wrestling as opposed to a wrestling show on TV. This match had purpose. Taya beat Ivelisse (through hook or crook) at Ultima Lucha 2. Worldwide Underground lost their trios match. Dario likes making the Gift of the Gods champion defend. Sexy Star vs Taya is a natural match-up (even if an unappealing one). It's all logical. It all comes together. It's all in lockstep. It all has purpose. That's on the way in. On the way out, Sexy Star gets another win (and she'll need those if they're going to push her into a title match at some point), and they build to a rematch between the Trios champs and Worldwide Underground. You have to appreciate the utility of the segment even if you didn't want to watch the match (though, again, I get a kick out of how deeply into her character Taya is).

MD: They're really going to spend an entire season building Catrina vs. Ivelisse? Isn't this a 39 episode season? The mind boggles.

ER: After the entertainment Moth has milked out of some lousy feuds, and his death wish bump performance at Ultima Lucha Dos, I'm really hoping season 3 sees Moth bumped further up the card. He's a puffy weirdo, and he really owns his weirdness.

3. Rey Mysterio vs. Pentagon Dark

ER: Fun match, Rey is just ridiculous. I have no clue how he's able to keep doing this. The dive by Rey early on looked great and Pentagon had an amazing catch off it. And throughout the match I dug all of Pentagon's strikes. His chops and short kicks look good, and the two superkicks he hit were delivered perfectly by him, with full extension, and sold perfectly by Rey. The finish was pretty lame, with Pentagon jawing with Vampiro, meaning that whole mess is still going on. I don't really understand the whole "Dark" aspect of the character. He doesn't act darker than before, and if anything he does more hammy babyface mannerisms than before. At one point he spinning arm pump like he was Chi Chi Rodriguez or something. What is darker about him now? He still loses all his matches and then acts like a sore loser post match. I think Pentagon Emo would have been a more fitting character change (though the splash mountain post match looked really great).

MD: Again, this came from a logical place, with Rey wanting to avenge his protege. Again, it was a little tricky from a "needs" perspective, because there was a need to have a big match to main event the first show of the season but they also had to protect Pentagon (even against their biggest star) and I don't think they managed it. I am, too, in complete awe of Rey. Maybe it's because we don't see him as much anymore and we took certain things for granted, but I come into his matches now completely unprepared for how good he is, even though I know, deeply and thoroughly, how good he is. Somehow, he still manages to surprise. For instance, he had a punch in this match that was just off the charts great. It's not a part of his act you usually think about, but there it was. What do you DO think about is his selling, and it's one of the great constants in the universe. There was a moment towards the end, after the Storm Cradle Driver, where the match (and the time limits involved) called Rey to get back up relatively quickly and head towards the finish and it took me out of things for just a half second, right until the moment you really good at look at his body language, and how thoroughly he was managing to still sell the effects of it, even as he moved through the next spots. In general, I thought this was a little insubstantial, but that's fine because they can always go back to it with bigger stakes.


COMPLETE LUCHA UNDERGROUND EPISODE GUIDE



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