LUCHA UNDERGROUND ~FINAL~ EPISODE: Ultima Lucha Cuatro - Part 2

ER: When I started Lucha Underground season 4 TWO YEARS AGO, who could have possibly predicted it would take two years to complete? It was that magical combination of near total disinterest in the product after seeing the show's quality decline each season to the next, with a stupid completionist attitude of "you've already written up the rest of the show, might as well finish this race". I loved the first and second season, found some bright spots in the third season, and have just not really enjoyed a lot of this final season. Replacing Dario with Antonio was a brutal decision, most storyline payoffs were weak or poorly constructed, and the roster wasn't anywhere close to as interesting as it was in the first couple seasons. But I like finishing projects, and this one was more of an attainable goal just because it was actually finite. And so, six years after the show began and just over two years after the show's finale aired, we come to the conclusion of Lucha Underground on Segunda Caida.

TL: LU is one of the weirdest entities in recent wrestling history: A pro wrestling outlet with genuine backing and a fresh take that became this supernova of a favorite within not only the wrestling community, but with actual, honest-to-God mainstream buzz. We're talking about a show that was featured at SXSW after its first season, for crying out loud! And then they predictably gave it all away, going away from what made it so appealing in the first place and making some questionable decisions both with personnel and booking that it could never really recover from. What was found out by the time Season 4 came around was that, just as a show can earn tons of goodwill basically overnight, it can lose it just as fast, if not faster. Talent predictably lost faith in the direction of the company when predatory contracts were handed out like a death sentence, and on top of that, outsiders brought in never really elevated the organically grown original roster member to the heights necessary to thrive. That may have been the most crucial aspect of the company: It was COMPLETELY organic and self-sustaining, and the pro wrestling trope of guys with name value on the outside looking in at the hot new show on the block trying to get involved because they're "veterans" essentially killed a lot of what made it work. So here we are, seeing how high the dead cat can bounce.

ER: I liked our opening Mundo/Taya segment. Mundo has good Meathead Han Solo energy, and Taya's braid shaking sell of the doll possessing her was hilarious. They seem like fun.


2/3 Falls: Dragon Azteca Jr. vs. Fenix

ER: This match was good enough, and they tried some big things, but I cannot get interested in the Melissa Santos/Fenix angle. She doesn't have the acting chops to pull it off, and it was far more interesting when they were just fawning over each other like they were in a 2000s Morrissey video. Her having to act through ring announcements is ruffff. The first two falls are a little dry, felt like they were holding back for the third fall, which makes sense. Rudo Fenix isn't really any different than Tecnico Fenix, other than occasionally glowering at Melissa, and a lot of his offense looks like it's focusing more on a soft landing, which makes some of their exchanges look tentative. The tercera gets changed to Falls Count Anywhere by Antonio, and we get some violent callbacks to the earlier falls, but they also don't make a ton of sense. Fenix hit a nice German in the ring on Azteca early in the match, and it's weird when he hits one on the floor that is sold basically the same as the one in the ring. Similarly, Azteca won the segunda with his big tornado DDT, yet when he does the same on the floor Fenix is up wandering into place seconds later. It's weird to do callback spots when you're only calling attention to the newer painful versions being somehow less effective. We get some nice big spots around a table that refuses to break (nice rana off the upper level seating, big Fenix senton off the top to the floor), before it finally gets pulverized by an Azteca cradle driver off the top. The big spots didn't really lead to any big pinfall moments though, and it all felt like it was just building up to be the background to Melissa's involvement, which leads to no justice or interesting storyline wrap. It does lead to Shaul Guerrero as our guest ring announcer for the final hour of the promotion's history, so that's a weird footnote.

TL: A bit too cooperative at the start for this one, and the rapid cuts on the strike exchanges make me beg for a wide shot to see how bad it looked in full. Azteca had a nice dive, and the Fenix Driver to finish the first fall was definitely nasty. Azteca's crispness on offense is always fun, shows out a bit in fall two with the absolutely wild swinging DDT to even it up. The restart to make the final fall Falls Count Anywhere was a bit on the nose, but at the same time, it'll give Fenix an excuse to do something mighty dumb. I liked the German basically out of nowhere on the floor, as suddenness in a stip match based on the ruleset always pops me. The swinging DDT on the floor was even more wild than the one that evened up the match, but I wish there was at least a pin opportunity off it. And then Fenix kicks out at two off the rana through the table, rendering that point moot, I guess. The Fenix Swanton to the floor where he basically wipes out on the table is some Great Sasuke shit, and then Fenix takes the Cassadora through the table for a near fall and I guess you have to actually kill him? And then one time through the table and another Fenix Driver finishes? So Azteca never really had a shot? Just a strange layout for the match, doesn't really give Azteca a rub as the Azteca/Melissa stuff made him look dumb, and then Antonio says, "Love makes you do strange things," which is the cherry on top of this. Shaul Guerrero is fine? This company mystifies to the very end.

The Mack vs. Mil Muertes

ER: This had the same kind of unhinged first season cartoon violence that made that season so damn enjoyable. Two heavyweights work a fast sprint that has hard punches and kicks, big dives, hard bumps, big nearfalls, and an axe getting swung at Mack's head. It is a death match, after all. This felt like the entire match was really made for absolute Temple Fan Enjoyment, as each section was worked the way the Temple seems to respond to. Muertes is my favorite brawler in the fed and I could watch him knock Mack in the head with those big right hands all day. Both guys hit crazy topes, and Muertes has an awesome one that knocks Mack backwards into the ringside casket. But I also really liked the big nearfalls section where both guys had titanic finishers spammed to death, like a sick Mack powerslam and an even sicker flatliner that Mack takes crooked on his head. The finish stretch is classic LU, with Mack hitting a few stunners and then breaking a damn brick over Mil's head, putting him down with one last big stunner. Great all action match that felt like them getting an opportunity to work the match I knew they could work together. They had a singles match earlier this season that was incredibly dumb, a Haunted House match that included a "serious" section where Muertes got out a knife. This showed they had much better ways of integrating weapons into a match that was actually interesting. I'm happy they got a second singles match on the books as it's a singles pairing I always wanted from LU. It took until the literal final episode to deliver, but we made it.

TL: The pre-match was cute, Shaul not finding her footing yet is a bit odd given she's only 30, only an AEW ring announcing credit to her name? I'm extremely happy this matchup is happening, as Mil and Mack were two of the bright spots in the promotion's history, and the casket to start has me stoked. Mack is nuts, hitting his fat guy tope con giro and braining himself on a DDT on the apron. And then things pick up from there and these are two guys that know how to turn it up a few notches. The weapons in the casket is an awesome touch, and then the Muertes tope sending both into the casket was gnarly. We have an axe and a sickle involved, so I guess someone's been watching Mr. Pogo matches. I mean, a couple of weeks ago, someone actually got shot during a wedding angle on IMPACT so an axe doesn't surprise me. An ICE PICK, goddamn. I just rewatched Basic Instinct a couple weeks ago and yeah, the ice pick shots led to grimacing. A spinning heel kick that looked nasty AND Mack saying "KUNTA KINTE 3000" before laying in a shot, Mack rules, man. Muertes also hits his nasty chokeslam, so I feel like I'm getting everything I wanted out of this match and then some. Mack getting to kick out of the Flatliner is a great sign of respect considering how protected that finish is, AND THEN MACK HITS HIM WITH A BRICK AND A THIRD STUNNER FOR THE WIN. Mack's run in LU was an absolute blast, and Muertes was without a doubt the most consistent person in the entire run; to see them go out with one last banger against each other is incredibly satisfying. Highly doubt anything will touch this for me the rest of the night.

PAS: This was good stuff, a classic Mil Muertes garbage brawl with blood, dumb bumps and stupid weapons. Nothing in this felt space alieny or spooky ghosts, just two big dudes escalating violently until the ending. The spin out of the chokeslam into a stunner was really cool, I wonder if Austin and the Undertaker ever did that spot? I liked the Icepick as Kevin Sullivan's spike and the blood looked really cool in Mack Afro's like red soul glow activator.  LU eventually killed me, and I stopped caring about any of this stuff, but this match is the kind of thing that initially drew me to the fed. 

Johnny Mundo vs. Matanza

ER: I am genuinely excited for this one. I don't think I'm being hyperbolic or nostalgic to say that this episode has captured a real Season 1 vibe so far, the obvious best season of the series run. Is this like how March 2001 WCW was actually feeling like things were changing for the better, just a few episodes before it was all over? The power glove thing is soooo stupid but also soooo perfectly Lucha Underground. Mundo has a super power glove and it gives us a sign of Matanza we've never seen before, because now Matanza actually fears something. So we get a fun mixture of invincible Matanza as he kicks out of an early Moonlight Drive and other Mundo attacks, and tosses him with a few hard landing suplexes. The Gift to the Gods looks great, and Matanza really chucks him off the top with an overhead belly to belly. They brawl up to the top of some Temple structures, and we get fun Mundo parkour leap into a far wall, but he still gets caught by Matanza and tossed into a different wall. We get a big stunt fall where Mundo gets tossed through a roof ("You can see the asbestos falling from the walls," says Striker, a poor thing to have on tape when it comes to future class action lawsuits) and we get the big LU moment of power glove Mundo emerging through a door in the wreckage. Scared Matanza is a fun sight and something we might as well get to see in the final episode, love how weird begging off Matanza felt. We still got a couple of Matanza last gasps and this never felt like Mundo was going to dominantly come back, and it still felt like a big deal when Mundo put the monster away.

TL: Matanza's entrance gear is absolutely outrageous, some shit that he should have worn every week. Big time Vader mastodon helmet vibes with it. And yeah, I'm with Eric, the Power Glove is one of the great kitschy pro wrestling gimmicks of our time, and Mundo has the range to do fun stuff with it. And that happens in the start where he shows it could actually take down Matanza, a great bit of psychology to start, and then Matanza catches him and starts absolutely mauling him with sick power moves, including an impressive vaulting belly-to-belly. Mundo had a nice little comeback, too, and then just an insane Super German Suplex from Matanza with Mundo vaulting off the top of the post for maximum height. If you're gonna have a bombfest and aren't going to crush each other like Mack and Muertes, at least go big and with style, you know? The parkour stuff was great, too, which is a rarity in a Mundo match for me, so these guys are doing a great job with this match style, something that has genuinely impressed me. It's wild that LU missed so much in Season 4 only to have a match that encapsulates everything about it in basically one match, and the Johnny rising from the dead to use the gauntlet's power to kick out of the Wrath of the Gods and BIG PUNCH his way to victory, just a boatload of entertaining pro wrestling bullshit. Eric and I have watched a ton of cheesy horror movies lately so all those tropes rang true here, and both guys played the roles to perfection. Wild that he'd give up the glove like that, though, better man than me.

ER: I disagree with Tim's statement that there are such a thing as "cheesy horror movies". 

Pentagon Dark vs. Marty The Moth Martinez

ER: The Moth has basically retired from wrestling post LU (he has had less than 10 matches since this one, and this one aired two years ago), and he goes out with an all time LU performance. This whole match is the Moth show. He hits a true gusher, no blood packets for the Moth, just that thick kind of blood that soaks your entire head and thins your hair. Marty throws himself around ringside with abandon, going through several sets of chairs and hard into the ringpost (which is when the blood starts flowing). LU is a fed where basically everyone (especially heels) was required to take sprawling bumps through ringside chairs, in the same way everyone in NOAH had to learn how to get thrown into a guardrail. Guys getting tossed into chairs is always something that lands with me, with so many moving parts that it always looks painful and chaotic. Now considering guys go through chairs at least once per LU episode, it's pretty awesome that Moth's chair bumps actually stood out as crazy. He hip tosses Pentagon through a table, rips at his mask, stabs him with a fork, eats what appears to be a piece of bacon, and gets Pentagon bleeding. The match needed more blood, so this is obviously a good thing. That's about all Moth got out of this, busting Pentagon open and eventually hitting him while stuck in a trashcan, because the bulk of this was Moth making Pentagon look like (Antonio Cueto voice) A GOD. Moth bumps around for Pentagon and makes Penta come off like the top guy, eats a flipping piledriver off the floor, flies out of the ring through a table, gets a barbed wire board bounced off his head, gets thrown through glass (!), and eats a sick package piledriver through a bunch of chairs. Pentagon was essentially working as Hogan during the last couple LU seasons, all catchphrases and relying on others to violently bump for him, but with enough charisma it is a tecnico formula that clearly works.

TL: Perhaps the most telling thing about LU is that Marty Martinez, who has essentially disappeared from pro wrestling since this finale, is in the main event of a show in the last episode of the series, and is in a match that really has little doubt going into it of who will win. Just an absolutely weird run for him, too, as the whole psychopath gimmick was so hit-and-miss outside the ring, only to see him overperform inside the ring, including with Fenix at Ultima Lucha Tres. But we know it's Penta Dark's night to end it on top, and the only thing to consider going in is if he'll actually go for it or hold off knowing that sweet Tony Khan money is coming. Marty is going for it early on, though, taking wild bumps and hitting an absolute gusher two minutes in, and if you're gonna go out, you might as well go out bleeding all over the place. Penta is bringing it, so I'm happy about that, at least. These two really do just go all out, chair shots, the garbage can shots, and then the bat shots to the garbage can Penta is stuck in, just really violent shit. I mean, Marty does lesser stuff like the table bump to the outside and then goes through the pane of glass full on, takes the Fear Factor through chairs...look, this is absolutely the Triple H at Royal Rumble 2000 performance from Marty, a very good way to go out, and Penta did enough here to make it worth watching. I don't think I liked it as much as Muertes/Mack, but I'm a big fan.

ER: Hilariously, a barely mobile Vampiro brings in his MASTER, who is actually honestly seriously called Hexagon Dark (because why would you follow a master who has one less side?) and Vampiro's master is the tiniest little man! I thought it was Darby Allin, but apparently it is Australian Suicide, who is the same size as AAA era Rey. They couldn't have found anyone with decent size? Bring back Ezekiel Jackson from the grave and put him under a Penta mask? I'm pretty sure the only guy in LU smaller than Hexagon would be Mascarita Sagrada, but I'd have to see them standing side by side to be certain. And then Jake Strong comes out and cashes in Gift of the Gods to be the final champion in LU history!! The whole episode felt designed to give the LU fans nothing but matches they wanted and finishes they wanted to see, and then the entire series ends with the fans bummed out and quiet about Jake Strong.

TL: The Australian Suicide Hexagon Dark master bullshit was hilarious to me, and leading to the obvious Strong cash-in bullshit was even more hilarious. Marty goes out like that knowing he's done, and then you get about as impactful a Strong cash-in as when he won his MITB cash-in. This means that LU absolutely was thinking a Season 5 was going to happen, when everything about the show said otherwise, and the postscripts, with Matanza getting his heart ripped out (?!?), Strong getting the glove, Taya being possessed by a damn doll, I think I would have loved to see Lucha Underground Season 5: Temple of the Gods. AND THE WADE BARRETT REVEAL. GODFREY IN THE LIMO. Why is Lucha Underground deciding to become interesting right when I lose interest? AND LITTLE CUETO IS BACK? Okay, I take back everything I said, bring it back, man.

ER: And we get a long, wistful series of vignettes, segments designed to set up the storylines for a season 5 that was assuredly never going to happen. Black Lotus murders Matanza with the gauntlet, Strong steals the gauntlet from series punching bag and perpetual loser Dragon Azteca Jr. (breaking his ankle just to remind him that he's a loser), Taya is possessed, and Wade Barrett is revealed as a higher power (in 2018 we would have had no clue how true a higher power he was, as taking Mauro Ranallo's voice off of television is a real god tier move). And to really hammer home the cruelty, we get one final glimpse of Dario being resurrected, and as much of a drag parts of this last season was, I would have obviously been back for season 5 and WARRING CUETOS!! But they went out with a very strong last episode, and that will leave a lot of goodwill for a promotion that I watched in its entirety.

TL: This is still pretty obviously the death knell for the promotion given most of the guys on top are with other promotions, namely AEW, but you have to give them credit for at least making it look like they had a plan going forward. Dueling Cuetos, leaning in completely to the Gods motif, I mean, gimme 22 episodes of that, please. Someone is going to want to watch this the entire way through years from now because it'll be readily available on something other than Tubi and be flabbergasted by what happened here: a promotion that got a ton of talent, most of them at exactly the right time, but only went forward with specific guys due to a number of factors that seem so incredibly dubious in retrospect, only to stumble sideways into greatness multiple weeks due to that multitude of talent. LU was odd until the very end, and perhaps the only thing that would be more odd and more fitting is if somehow they got everyone back together for Season 5, even with all odds stacked against them. We'll be ready when it happens.

COMPLETE, SOMEHOW, EPISODE GUIDE TO LUCHA UNDERGROUND

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Lucha Underground Season 4 Episode 17: The Moth and the Butterfly

TL: Oh my God, the opening cinematic with Aerostar telling Melissa he's seen the end of everything was extremely bad. Cringey bad. Like the SNL guest who can't read the cue cards off camera bad. Melissa had to have been fed every line she said. Aerostar, bless his heart, is doing what he can with this.

XO Lishus/Joey Ryan/Ivelisse vs. Paul London/The White Rabbit/El Bunny

ER: The return of Mascarita Sagrada to LU can only be a good thing, and Killer Kross finally makes a TV match, a fun late addition to the fed. This was a jump up from last week's trios match. The Rabbit Tribe is a fun stable and the mix of London/Sagrada/Kross is a twisted WAR team that totally works. Sagrada vs. XO Lishus was not a match I realized I wanted, but damn was it fun as hell as it was happening. Paul London bumps around for Ivelisse as well as any man in the fed has, a nice recovery for her after a sloppy performance last week. We got a huge London dropkick to the floor and a Sagrada stopped momentum dive to Ivelisse that somehow looked good. And they did a fun thing all match long by having Kross glower from the apron, with it practically a known conclusion that he was just going to end things the moment he stepped into the match. He did, and they finished on an awesome visual, Kross choking out Joey Ryan with a mandible claw, wearing gimmicked gloves with bloody fingers, like he was gouging into Ryan's esophagus.

TL: I'm stoked to see what Kross does here as the White Rabbit. Mascarita and Paul bring it more often than not, but Kross is here to be brooding and explosive (supposedly). The London unitard/powder white face paint combo is the right kind of weird. Ivelisse getting the hot tag here was certainly a choice. XO LIshus and Sagrada paired off somewhat nicely, and Sagrada just in general came off really well here. One of the better examples of his size not being played up as something of a detriment. I agree that the match-ending mandible claw visual was awesome, and shows how presence and intent goes a long way. The stuff surrounding this was fine, but the Kross payoff was about as good as it's gonna get. It's so weird that they bring him in now with only a few weeks to go and he goes over that strong, but my thought is they take the trios titles...and then the company folds? Sigh.

Killshot vs. Son of Havoc

ER: So I forgot what had been going on between Killshot and Son of Havoc, or if they even had anything, but Striker tells me this is a big match so I'll go with it. They did work it as if it were more important than the #1 contender's match last week, so maybe this is a big deal. They use way too much sound sweetening, but there was good stuff here. Son of Havoc hits a big tope and he's always landing too close to the Temple steps, and I could see these two stepping up and having a fun mask match. They felt like they had big match formula down in a good way here, even if I don't like some of their offense.

TL: Seeing Strickland as Isaiah Scott now in NXT allows him to show off some more personality but the offense still doesn't work with me yet. He needs to tighten things up a bit, and this match doesn't bode well for two guys who like to try stuff that come off incredibly choreographed. And while this did have hints of that, they didn't try to do as much as I thought! It at least had good intentions, and I thought for sure there was going to be a few spots that got too cute. This was fine. And now we get to see it again as an apuestas. THAT'S probably going to be when they get too cute and I yell and scream, but whatever.

TL: Moth gets some promo time and looks way more comfortable in pre-taped segments than with a live mic. Reklusa is a great wrestling name for Chelsea, too.

No DQ: Marty The Moth Martinez vs. Mariposa

ER: This was great, easily one of the best LU matches in this cursed season. I think we'll have to do an actual ranked Season 4 Top 10 matches list when we're done with this. There's a strong chance that I won't have anything from this season on our MOTY List, and there have been strong representatives from the other 3 seasons. There were many reps from season 1, several from season 2, less in season 3, but none so far 17 episodes in to season 4. This came damn close, a really fun and violent brawl with Mariposa taking a cruel beating and firing back with some inventive comebacks. We built up to a couple of very strong nearfalls, more effective than anything I can remember this season. Martinez really beats her up, and I think it actually worked better because they have been presented as having a weird relationship for their entire time in LU. They've established that we could really expect these two to treat each other however, so the intergender thing worked for it. Mariposa took a great beating and bled, got slammed into walls and even powerbombed on the floor! Her comebacks were logical and violent, at one point burying Moth in about 15 chairs, all throwing hard at him, and late in the match she punts him right in the balls as payback for his shot to the crotch at the beginning of the match. I get the Reklusa interference (and love the name too) but I was enjoying the match so much that I was hoping they'd build to something more special for a finish. But this was good, and the postmatch beating Marty gave her felt edgier than LU has felt in awhile. Fans are super hot for the Moth/Pentagon title match, and even though Pentagon is probably the guy I'm least interested in watching on this current roster, I am now foolishly excited for that match.

TL: Oh HELL YES. MORE CHEERLEADER MELISSA. Low key, she's been one of the best match for match performers in the show's history, and I'm stoked to see her get a showcase match here. The start was great, the headbutt from Mariposa, the low blow, the vicious beatdown and mask ripping in the corner by Marty, Mariposa flying into the stands and then SHE BLEEDS ON THE CHAIR SHOT. And then Martinez whips her headfirst into the table like a goddamn madman and this has my attention pretty easily from the get go. Marty then powerbombs her into the grate and then sits out on the floor with it; a sequence that looks kinda blah in other matches, but because of the carnage on the outside so far, really fits in as Marty dominating her early on. They're going for it and it's like they woke this show up a bit. And then the madness of that chair pileup spot during the Mariposa comeback, and Vampiro literally jumping for joy as Mariposa rains down two dozen or so thrown chairs on Marty. I can't get over how much this rules, to be honest. When she set up the chair, I thought she was gonna go crazy and hit the Kudo Driver through it, but the Samoan Drop was nasty as all hell, too. Amazing near falls in this match on her two attempts. Then Marty retains with Pentagon's Fear Factor to retain after Reklusa interference to rub it in. Spectacular stuff, an absolute burst of energy on a show that has long needed it, easily the best match this season. Mariposa remains one of my favorite wrestlers in the history of the show, and even though for whatever reason they didn't give her much to work with in-ring, she absolutely crushed it every time she was given an opportunity to shine. Marty is gonna die for us in the Cero Miedo match (let's be honest: he ain't topping Vampiro from the first one) and that will be fun but man, even without spoilers, it's easy to see how things are going to end up. Five more episodes to go...

COMPLETE GUIDE TO LUCHA UNDERGROUND

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Lucha Underground Season 4 Episode 15: The Hunted

ER: We still have EIGHT episodes of this show left before it's all done. Forever. I think the last time I watched anything from season 4 was at least 8 months ago. This episode aired 13 months ago! I was not enjoying the season, I do not remember much about the season, I don't remember the feuds and stories...but I feel too close to the finish line to not write up every remaining episode. We're 94% of the way home. Why not finish this, he said, trying to convince himself.

TL: The worst thing that could happen to our assessment of Lucha Underground in this, the supposed New Boom Period of 2019, is that everything becomes incredibly dated IMMEDIATELY. Nearly every major player involved in this show has become a completely different (and in the majority of cases, bigger) persona aside from this in the eight months since we last reviewed an episode. When it was cool to see Prince Puma and Ricochet separately or Cobb and Matanza separately, the luster that LU once had makes it legitimately weird to see everyone used here compared to how they're used now. Without question, I don't think there's anyone on this show in the final eight weeks that we watch (EIGHT. MORE. SHOWS. WE CAN DO THIS.) where I'm going to come away thinking, "LU legitimately was the best thing the guy was ever a part of." That's an absolutely strange coda on a show that had some of the best non-major talents in the world on it and was thought of as a true alternative less than half a decade ago. In its defense? It has not resorted to needing to be taped via iPhone stream on Twitch before their "biggest show of the year," so at least that's something. I almost feel like that's how I'm going to watch these shows as we finish up; just comparisons to how LU shortchanged them and how much better they are now.

Except Mil Muertes. If there's one good thing to take away from the legacy of this show, Mil Muertes is a stone cold all-timer. And even THEN. Mesias in PR/AAA was insane. "All that glitters is not gold" as the yacht rockers say. Or Aristotle. One of them.

ER: We CAN do this. Should we do this? Does anyone care if we do this? Probably not. But we're finishing this stupid thing that I started.


Fenix vs. Aerostar

ER: This was actually a nice match to jump me back into the LU home stretch. The finish couldn't have been lazier, but I was really digging this up until that point. Fenix was bumping around big for Aerostar and Aerostar was getting plenty of chances to show off his specific set of skills. He hits an insane dive to the floor where not only does he not use his hands, he has his hands behind his back! He got huge distance, really missile launching himself into Fenix. I also dug later when Fenix ran him the length of the ring, hard into the railing. Fenix staggers amusingly into position after a flipping piledriver, and it's totally worth it as Aerostar hits a killer springboard DDT that Fenix spikes wonderfully for. They got way too SFX heavy on all of Aerostar's yakuza kicks, 7 straight kicks and all of them had that silly slap sound. But I liked Aerostar's makeshift code red after all of them, and I liked how Fenix leaned into the kicks. Now, the finish is real uninspired, as Fenix just decides that the match is going to be over, throws a couple of nice open hand chops (including a real nasty slap right to Aerostar's prone stomach), hits a dropkick off the middle rope that seems like he took the worst of, and then hits a driver for the uncontested finish. I really hate when a guy just decides to come back and then goes right to the finishing sequence after being dominated for several minutes. However, Fenix's spinkick to Dragon Azteca Jr. post match look fantastic.

TL: Fenix walks slowly and wears black so you know he's a heel when he comes out, but I'm getting some really heavy Killshot vibes here and that's not a compliment. There's some good things he can do as a heel; his insane athleticism and kinetic energy means he can make some simple offense really dynamic. His pump kick is killer here and that corner spin kick landed flush. My favorite move he did in the match was that dropkick on the apron that was Shinjiro Otani-esque. When he's been more of a heel with Pentagon before, it hasn't been like this, and while it's not completely fleshed out or, you know, really that good, the flashes you get are still intriguing. Aerostar hits the majority of his spots really well as per usual, the no-hands dive was absolutely insane (followed by Fenix sitting up like some drunk Taker cosplayer), but this was right smack dab in the middle of the LU house style for me. The post match was actually well done (outside of the ACTING by Melissa) and Dragon Azteca, Jr. took his beating like a king.

Dragon Azteca Jr. vs. Marty The Moth Martinez

ER: Oh wow, forgot all about The Moth. I'm pretty sure he has wrestled about as often post-Lucha Underground as I have written about Lucha Underground. Is he even in wrestling at this point? Has he somehow been the only wrestler still affected by the obnoxious LU contracts? He was a guy I really grew to like on LU, and here I am reminded why. He takes a big looping DA DDT right on his forehead, and takes a big damn bump over the top to the floor. Azteca is selling the beating the Fenix gave him before the match, which only made him doing iffy kick combos seem even more dumb. There was plenty of light on the kicks from both guys, but they were only giving the hand slap FX to Azteca, which just made his strikes look worse.

TL: Marty's control sequence here isn't much to really go on about. Azteca comes back and hits pescado con tijeras and then a fantastic somersault dive over the corner and it at least picks up a bit after that. And then it ends???? What a strange end to the match. I don't know who's booking the finishes tonight but they are absolutely discombobulated and sudden and don't make sense. Marty's gonna want Penta again so the cards have been shown a bit here. I'm not sure how much I'm looking forward to that particular match.

ER: Dario's...uncle? father? is just as stupid as I remember. What a tremendously bad idea that was, to take the far and away most interesting character on the show and make him do an atrociously bad voice.

TL: The White Rabbit as Morpheus using Anton Chigurhisms? Sure. El Bunny is an objectively funny lucha handle, though. Paul London continues to shine as the brightest light amongst the darkness this season.


King Cuerno vs. Mil Muertes vs. Pentagon Dark

ER: This match was really fun when they were on the floor, and kind of a mess whenever they were in the ring. They muddled their way somewhat awkwardly through "3 guys hitting each other at once" spots, but things pick up nicely when Pentagon hits a big tope con giro, accidentally chops the ringpost trying a follow up attack to Muertes, and gets nailed by a great Cuerno tope while recoiling from that chop. Pentagon also gets tossed into the upper level fans, taking a cool bump. The in ring is messy. Cuerno hits a too obvious thigh slap knee (it must be muscle memory to do those, because the guys should know that LU is going to sweeten the sound for them), Pentagon whiffs on a backcracker that Muertes still sells (smart move by production to shift to the overhead camera for that one), and the whole thing wraps up pretty quickly for the names involved. Muertes couldn't feel much more like an afterthought, and that feels downright crazy to me if you've watched the other seasons.

TL: Even I though I hate the stip, I find myself enjoying Mil in three-way matches because he's both incredibly good at taking offense and conversely looking like a monster. That's how this starts and it's fun to watch. Penta hitting a dive early??? Okay, if he's here to work, I'll give him my attention. I thought he would full on Lazy Muta this but he's come to play in this one. Mil then turns into the monster he is on the outside with a sick standing spear and then hip tossing Penta over the guardrail. Hey, if you want to take part of the match off, you better take a hell of a bump in exchange. Then when he gets back in he hits some sub-Rollins level sling blades, proving some things never change. And then the run of shit finishes continues as Mil hits his awesome choke slam, waits for some reason, then Penta hits two backcrackers before spinning a kick into the Fear Factor. When Mil was on offense and basically made Penta step up a bit to match him, this was great. Outside of the dive, Cuerno was just another guy to take the fall.


Pentagon Dark vs. Marty The Moth Martinez

ER: Marty won the Gift of the Gods title from Dragon Azteca earlier, and he bargains with Antonio Cueto to get a same night title match. And they put the title on The Moth!!! That rules. That's like some dope 1990 AWA behavior and I am here for it. The match wasn't much - Pentagon had several nice moments in the prior match but felt like a guy losing a title match here - but Chelsea Green runs out and kicks Pentagon right in the balls, and I am giddy at them putting the title on Moth. The fans seem pissed, and now I am genuinely excited at the prospect of the final episodes of the LU run being them only pushing guys who were not actively trying to work whatever weird definition of "opposition shows" LU was pissed about. Let's make this a Moth/Paul London show from here on out!!

TL: The first thing that came to mind when Papa Cueto said Marty could cash in was when Damien Sandow cashed in on Cena. Of course, both guys here are worse than both guys there, and that's Sandow we're talking about. Sooooooo, all that protecting of Pentagon being booked only to have him lose to Marty? That's a hell of a joke to play on Penta for chasing Tony Khan's money. HA! I was trying to figure out who that was and it was Chelsea Green! Awesome. Good for her getting some run here. I'm with Eric. Bring on the non-muckrakers, man. STRAP UP BIG BAD STEVE.


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Lucha Underground Season 4 Episode 1: El Jefe

ER: Yeah yeah, we're back. We're late because of me, but we're back. I am still doing this spoiler free, which is seeming like an exponentially stupid thing to do considering I've liked each season less than the one that preceded it. I'm hoping for a nice return to form this season. Saying that, I don't actually know who is still involved with the fed, which is part of the fun/horror of going into this thing blind.

TL: Hilariously, if we didn't avoid spoilers, we might cherry pick through things instead on here. There's a lot of horror in this one, though. A LOT of horror.

ER: I immediately regret falling behind at the very beginning of the season, since we get introduced to Papa Antonio Cueto, which I imagine caused quite the varied reactions. I both love it for its ridiculousness, and hate it for its everything else. This is clearly a show with some money behind it, surely we have some extra dough in the coffers for a better wig? Cueto's wig was a 0.8 on the Amanda Bynes Courtroom Appearance scale. The beardwork was okay. The voicework was sub-Christian Bale Batman growl voice. The framed photo was as good as any funeral portrait you've seen, but they lose major points for not having a Temple flower arrangement. Okay this was fucking awful.

TL: So, we get the saga of Dario, the feds, and the power glove, complete with Lorenzo Lamas’ removed eyeball and some dude in a Puma mask who may or may not look like someone who has a big match coming up at NXT: Takeover Brooklyn 4. But THEN we get Dario not only dying, but his father coming to his sparsely attended funeral.

AND IT’S THE SAME GUY THAT PLAYED DARIO WHO IS PLAYING HIS FATHER.

Imagine after the aborted Vince car bomb angle that got shelved because He Who Shall Not Be Named did That Which Shall Not Be Described, you get Vince coming back as the ghost of Vince Sr. haunting Raw on a regular basis. It would have been way better than the Twitter bot that played the Raw GM for months upon months. I understand LU is a pulp show on a pulp network and there is some goofiness going on, but this goes beyond the pale on the goofiness scale. Of course, Antonio berates his son, knocks down his memorial portrait in the ring because he finally has control of HIS promotion, and then announces Aztec Warfare for the LU title. That is definitely a way to start off the new season of this show.


Aztec Warfare 4!

ER: Okay, THIS was fucking awful. What a terrible, sluggish, boring, uninteresting match to start your 4th season off with a fart sound. This whole mess was designed to show the dominance of Pentagon, and for a lazy dude he turned in one of his absolutely laziest performances I've seen. Maybe because it was so long and one-note? It was bad. It started with him and Tommy Dreamer having a super slow mo kendo stick battle, and continued with him hitting his finisher on approximately 10 guys. The new entrants appear to be coming in every 30 seconds, and there's an elimination every 30-60 seconds. New guys come in, new guys take one move, new guys leave. It was fucking awful. Even Matt Striker wasn't trying, and brother they don't come more try hard than Matt Striker. In arguably the least inspired moment of a match filled with uninspired moments, Vinny Massaro comes out, gets a pepperoni pizza delivery, starts to eat a slice and in the flattest tone I've ever heard from him Striker weakly says "PizzaGate". That's it. That's the joke. The joke is that there is no joke. There's a reference, but no attempt at a joke. And the reference is already nearly 2 years past expiration. When Pentagon hooked Massaro's leg on the pin I expected him to flatly sputter out a Sandy Hook reference, but no. I rooted pretty hard for Chavo, just because he was infinitely more interesting in this match than Pentagon, and the crowd clearly hates him because he's...well, no LU fans were ever able to give any actual reason why they disliked Chavo. Striker points out how hot Catrina looks, and normally the golf with eyes bugging out and a tongue on the floor reaction from Striker is the lamest, but in an aggressively shitty match like this Catrina's hotness really was a genuine highlight. Fenix was easily the most interesting of the wrestlers involved, and it really wouldn't have taken much effort from him to earn that title. Awful, awful, boring, lazy match.

TL: I actually wrote out a play by play for this because I'm absolutely crazy and also thorough when it comes to pro wrestling things I feel like I have to watch. Good lord almighty was this a slog to get through. I mean absolutely terrible in most ways. The idea behind it was to absolutely make Pentagon The Guy in the promotion, but instead, it's like a Cliff's Notes version of the folks you might see on this program week to week, and it really doesn't do a good job of selling that here. Pentagon is in at 6, and it doesn't get actually entertaining until Fenix is in at 13, where he outshines his brother in like 1/25 the time. The biggest issue I had with this is that all the guys you'd be excited to see, especially someone like Muertes, are in the match for all of like...2 minutes? I mean, Chavo gets a producer's run? Marty gets a shot to try and score an upset on Pentagon as the final guy in the match? Especially after Marty lost to Fenix in the way he did last season? This isn't even a reset. It's like taking the neuralizer from Men In Black. And after this I need it. There isn't a single thing coming out of this that makes me excited for what's to come, and that's a terrible omen for a show that already blows so hot and cold.

ER: And we get more from Papa Cueto, which was a character that just could not have sounded good at any step of the writing process. I'm not as imaginative as I perhaps once was, but I cannot actually imagine a worse way to start a new season of LU. This honestly has to be the worst episode in the history of the series.

TL: Can we get Lorenzo Lamas back up in this thing again please? More Godfrey? Papa Cueto has worn out his welcome and it's only been one show. I started reviewing these with a Sexy Star match. This whole show was worse than that feeling.


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Lucha Underground Season 3 Episode 38: Ultima Lucha Tres Part 2

ER: Sami Callihan is a really impressive actor, I totally bought him having a mean domestic spat with his partner, getting inappropriately into her face and calling her bitch with a clenched jaw, spit flying out, really looking like he might hit her. It was a super impressive method performance where you could tell he did a ton of research to get motivated to act that way.

TL: Ivellise kicking Sami through the bathroom stall door is female empowerment. But first, he’s got to physically threaten her, not let her get a word in, and then call her a bitch when he doesn’t get his way. Hashtag feminism.

TL: Vampiro wearing a 10 out of 10 on the Barry Darsow Municipal Golfer Polo Shirt Scale, by the way. I halfway expected him to say Lucha Underground was brought you in part by Callaway.

1. Battle Royal w/ Joey Ryan vs. PJ Black vs. Ricky Mundo vs. Vinnie Massaro vs. Mascarita Sagrado vs. Argenis vs. Mala Suerte vs. Saltador vs. Paul London vs. Cortez Castro vs. Son of Madness vs. The Mack vs. Pimpinela Escarlata

ER: Tim recently came over to hang out for my birthday and our little group spent all night watching old battle royals and essentially wagering on the outcome, betting on things like who would have the best bump, who would be first out, who would have the best overall performance, etc. It was amazing, makes me want to track down literally every battle royal that's made tape and make this a regular thing. This was a bit short to qualify for a great battle royal, but it was fast moving and we got a lot of big elimination bumps. Son of Madness gets chucked far by the Rabbit Tribe; Mascarita gets a fun elimination of Ryan/Castro as they fight on the apron; Pimpinela is oddly the main guy featured, given the last entrance, Striker not shutting up about him, which is odd only because he was only a fringe part of season 1; Vinnie is first out but hits a big uppercut and eats a big superkick; there was plenty of fun for the time allotted. It worked.

TL: That birthday party included me basically knowing the winners of the Cruiserweight Battle Royal ahead of time in nearly every category, and I ran away with all the points on the scoreboard that night. My finest hour in my friendship with Eric, I’d say. Vinnie should have lasted longer. Pimpi coming in for a one-off to do a bunch of homoerotic spots seems odd to me. Makes me wish we got Cassandro instead. This was fun, but short. Dario getting more jokes written for him! Where the hell was this all season? Guess he only got up for it because it was Ultima Lucha??

ER: The rules will be slanted against Tim next time. He should have purposely dumbed down a few of his answers, thrown a couple of matches, made it competitive. Dude took 80% of the match and refused to job.

2. Catrina vs. Ivelisse

ER: What a weird featured match. Catrina is someone who is a part time wrestler at best (this match was filmed exactly 4 years to the date of her last WWE match, and she has two listed matches that happened in the interim), but can teleport, and is out in fighter braids. Ivelisse has not wrestled on TV for almost a year prior to this match. Their feud is slightly cold. But the match was probably better than it should have been, and I don't mean that in a backhanded way, it was really fun. They used a few tricks to stretch it to (short) match length, but it worked. Ivelisse charges out and takes her down, and considering what they were wearing I'm shocked Striker didn't do a hack Joel Gertner "Catfiiiiiiiight!" But Catrina bails and runs into Dario's office, and by the time Ivelisse breaks in she gets a bottle broken over her head. Now, she ends up breaking THREE BOTTLES over Iverlisse's head, which seems...a bit much. We get a blood packet, as the camera cuts away from Ivelisse's clean face and cuts back to her just absolutely covered in blood. Catrina takes a cool shot into the guardrail and they brawl up the stairs and around the Temple. We get a good nearfall, we get a good spot with Ivelisse kicking Catrina's arm as Catrina was swinging her special rock at Ivelisse's head. They took some good shortcuts, I thought Catrina handled herself well, and it was good to see Ivelisse back.

TL: MIL MUERTES IN A SUIT ALERT. Good lord almighty, what a badass look. There’s a part of me that wishes Andrade “Cien” Almas would do the same in promos, wearing his Sombra mask. Hearing Striker try to sell the backstory to this match is hilarious when it was literally booked as a way to get two good looking women down to their skimpies like it’s Russo-booked WWF. Catrina isn’t great in ring, but she has good facial expressions and knows how to be aggressive. When it finally gets back in the ring, there’s a couple good nearfalls (Striker: “THERE WERE NO FANCY WRESTLING MOVES!” - That comes literally right after Ivellise hits a step-up DDT to finish) and some interesting fighting over the stone. Of course, they HAD to give Sami his heat back, but beating a woman with a hammer while she’s bleeding is more than a bit much. Good lord. This show needs to make up its mind, man. Hashtag feminism.

3. Mask vs. Hair: Fenix vs. Marty the Moth Martinez

ER: Vampiro says that no main event match stip has ever been bigger, but the fed has had a match with a career on the line, and I believe stips that have lead to murder, so...I'm afraid I'm going to have to start taking what Vampiro says with a grain of salt. I'm not sure he's always 100% truthful or accurate. Lucha Underground runs a lot of gimmick matches, a lot of #1 contender matches, but not a ton of stipulation matches. Or, if there is a stip, Dario tends to do something to meddle with it. This is an old fashioned Hair vs. Mask stip, with no shenanigans, a good amount of blood, and a great payoff. This felt like a big time lucha brawl, and not like one of their overstuffed overproduced epics. There was even kind of a flubbed miscommunication moment, which oddly enough also made the match seem more "real" than the other stunt show matches the fed has put out, where they've re-done spots and edited them in. This felt like a honest lucha apuestas match and I loved it. Moth is such a fat-faced psycho, tearing at Fenix's mask early and then busting him open on an uncovered turnbuckle. Fenix is still able to fight back with a big superkick and a huge flip dive onto the Martinez siblings, and a couple flipping cutters (including one on the apron). We get some nice character work with Martinez as the sadistic oaf, tripping on his way back into the ring, but it leads to Fenix eating boots on a moonsault and then eating knees on Moth's crazy chestbreaker/dominator. Fenix catching Moth off the top with a Spanish Fly was huge, and the move really benefitted from the LU cameras. Moth ramped up the psycho by going after Fenix with a pair of rusty scissors, jabbing them into his cut and running them across Fenix's throat. Gross. We get great involvement from both seconds, as Melissa gets on the apron to trick Marty, ending with her slapping him and punting him right in the balls, leading to a huge kick and ropewalk 450 from Fenix to win. Mariposa gets her great second moment after the match as Moth is escaping, bashing him in the head with a chair at the top of the steps, then handcuffing him to the railing to get his haircut. You knew Marty would make great faces during his haircut, and he delivers. Awesome traditional apuestas, probably my favorite LU match this season, with great storyline culmination, great blood, some comeuppance for Melissa, everything I wanted.

TL: I had seen highlights from this match but don’t remember seeing this in full, so I’m pretty stoked to see this thing from the start, especially now knowing that I’ve seen all the Emmy-level acting in the story leading up to this. Fenix is wearing white, so you know what’s gonna happen here. And a couple minutes in, he eats the exposed buckle and this turns into the best apuestas match with blood I’ve seen in maybe a decade. Fenix hits an absolute gusher and is all over the place bleeding. Some amazing shots in this thing of blood falling off Fenix’s mask and forehead, dripping onto the mat. I’m a huge fan of Fenix’s offense here: Every move he normally does with his trademark snap is weary and reached for here. He’s bleeding out, he’s on adrenaline, he’s going in whatever spurts of energy he can find. It’s not your traditional brawling tecnico performance that you might be used to in these apuestas matches, but you are with Fenix on every move he makes to try and get back into this thing. Marty toed the line between going too far and going just far enough. The scissors stuff before Melissa got involved legit made me feel uncomfortable. The finish is the best culmination of a story in LU history. Melissa getting to be a part of Marty getting his comeuppance and doing the haircutting is perfect. We rip LU for doing a lot of things wrong in storytelling and getting too wrapped up in minutiae bullshit, but for all the melodrama we raked them over the coals for leading up to this, the payoff was so good you forget all of it. WAY better this time around watching it for me, and it’s hilarious to say this after what ended last week’s show, but they topped that match here with the drama beating out the craziness for me. I’m still big on Matanza/Muertes Grave Consequences for best match in LU history, but this is right there with it.

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Lucha Underground Season 3 Episode 36: The Rise of the Ring Announcer

ER: I really liked the opening Melissa Santos/Fenix segment, a lot. It came off like an updated take on Girlfight or something. The prior romantic scenes between Fenix/Santos came off silly, this came off downright steamy, like the George Clooney/Jennifer Lopez scenes in Out of Sight, or the Timothee Chalamet/Armie Hammer scenes in Call Me By Your Name. I thought their body language was really strong, loved the interplay of submissions, loved the sparring and grappling as metaphor for relationship dynamics, that gentle hair flop onto Fenix's face, thought all of it worked tremendously well. Now, if you think of it out of a vacuum it gets weirder, as you realize that Melissa Santos is going to be in the ring wrestling for the first time ever and they only announced it at the beginning of the episode where that was happening, and then you start thinking "Wait these two are locking in these tight go behinds and she's letting her hair seductively flop all over Fenix's face and...she hasn't even seen his face? This all seemed pretty intimate. It feels like they've been hanging out. And this whole time, during meals, during dates, during post training showers...Fenix has not removed that mask? How terrible must that mask smell?? Santos has let herself grow dangerously, emotionally close to a man who may have a Monster energy tattoo on his forehead for all she knows. But that's what thinking gets you. Follow your heart. The segment was good.

TL: I can’t even begin to top what Eric just said so my only addition to this, whether it was good editing or camera cuts or what have you, is that Santos looked like she could go!!! I all of a sudden am into whatever that tag match is gonna be. This was one of the best examples of female empowerment the show has ever portrayed because this was natural as opposed to shoved down our throats like Sexy Star was. Santos came off as a big deal with this, which is what wrestling promos are supposed to do!

Dante Fox vs. Texano

ER: I liked this more than I expected, and it's true that Fox is typically more interesting when he's against more of a power base than another athletic flipper. Texano can get really lazy during routine moments, looking like a somnambulist going through simple sequences like a lazy clothesline/back elbow sequence, but he excels here at making Fox look strong. When a guy throws a lazy clothesline you wouldn't expect him to throw himself into a crucifix bomb, and Texano is good at working around fast Fox sequences, like all of the stuff on the apron that eventually lead to the run-up-ringpost moonsault. The match was a good Worldwide length of 5-6 minutes, and even though it got too move trade-y down the stretch I was pleasantly surprised overall. Famous B botches (in storyline) the ending and calls Texano the winner, so Dario sets up B vs. Texano for next week. B says his arm is still broke from Pentagon and Dario FINALLY gets a classic Dario line in (feels like it's been WAY too long) when he says "Well then it looks like it will be a...handicap match!" Pure gold. Dario hasn't felt fully "Dario" this season, and comes off really ineffective and less the all powerful manipulator. That line was needed.

TL: Striker makes a “Clerks” joke (“I’m not even supposed to be here today”) because of Dante and not only does it make me feel old but reminds me that Kevin Smith almost died mere days ago. I thought this was alright, but not a standout or anything. Fox doing a faceplant on an enzuigiri was amusing and then became even moreso when he just went back on offense after taking a bump that looked like it would have killed him. I’ve talked about how Texano has basically looked disinterested ever since when he first came to LU with Alberto Del Rio and was used to put him over not only in LU, but in AAA, so this really does feel like he’s collecting a paycheck at this point. Agree with the line usage, but in Dario’s defense, he was in jail, man. He’s seen some shit. Just not the same guy anymore.

Marty "The Moth" Martinez/Mariposa vs. Fenix/Melissa Santos

ER: Still really surprised that this match wasn't announced at all in advance. Do they advertise? Maybe they advertise and this was announced. It feels like a pretty big match within the LU universe. And it was really fun, although after all the wins and big moments they gave to Sexy Star it's ridiculous that they can't give Santos a good moment. Moth has been licking and rubbing on her for a couple seasons now, and while she's a non-wrestler that never stopped Sexy Star from wrestling. Give her a fucking pinfall, who are we protecting here? Anyway Fenix works a nice match against the two, including hitting an actual good looking Lethal Injection and hitting a wild twisting dive to the floor. Santos getting into the match was a great moment, with Moth running into a perfectly timed high kick from the apron and the gets Irish whipped into elbow smashing Mariposa. The tandem offense didn't look great but the moment was still good.

TL: This WAS announced in advance, but Eric, much like me when I’m trying to burn through reviews, most likely fast-forwarded past the 20-second mention of it from a couple weeks ago by Striker and Vampiro. So…what I’m trying to say is that Eric made the right decision in skipping past how this match got announced in the first place. Striker says Fenix has a “legendary mask” like he’s Atlantis or something. Mariposa is so sudden with her offense, it’s amazing to think she’s been doing this for two decades. One thing in addition to Melissa doing the job in this match: There’s now absolutely no doubt that Marty is gonna lose. Had Melissa gotten a pin on Mariposa, at least you could have seen a more level playing field. Melissa’s offensive moments were definitely cool, but the way this ended was a bit too much.

ER: We get a rundown of the epic card for the 4 episode (!) Ultima Lucha extravaganza, which should make for plenty of fun. Although how absolutely ridiculous does Ivelisse vs. Catrina look at this point?? The last Ivelisse match aired 6 months before this episode, and Catrina has never wrestled in the fed. Does anyone watching even remember why they made that match?

TL: It’s a huge card, but to be honest, I’m really only looking forward to the main event, the cage match, and the Fox/Killshot match. There’s gonna be a lot of filler for me to get into.

Paul London vs. Mala Suerte vs. Saltador vs. Cortez Castro vs. Drago vs. Son of Havoc vs. Pentagon Dark

ER: This was a pretty cracking spotfest, one of the best Drago performances in awhile, a continuation of Paul London as an extremely relevant wrestler after a few years in the woods, some great Saltdaor stuff, just a ton of fun. Drago was the centerpiece of this whole thing, either tying things together and finding things to occupy time. I loved him sprinting across the ring after London leading to London doing his bananas springboard tope en reversa to the floor. he easily could have just stood there doing nothing since London was going to do the spot anyway, this made things feel more immediate. Saltador got some nice moments and I especially loved him getting backdropped into London (who was slumped in the corner). We got a couple big dives, everybody moved in and out of it smoothly, a couple nice saves, just a fun spotfest. We do get a dumbo ending with Havoc and Pentagon getting simultaneous pinfalls, but Dario comes out to announce a ladder match between the two, which is fine.

TL: I like that this match was basically laid out like an atomicos or a cibenertico, as it never really let up and gave everyone some shine. If you’re gonna do a damn seven way, you might as well take advantage and sprint. And yeah, they sprint, big time. London looks great in this match, like a true Droog. I wish he would talk shit in Cockney gibberish slang between moves. But my guy in this match? Saltador. All his offense looked crisp as all hell. He had this great springboard legdrop that looked snug when it landed and he had a great dive. Also looked great taking down Pentagon to start. I don’t like the ending either, a true bait and switch bullshit ending, but we got to see Dario yell “LADDER MATCH!” in a way that made me smile. He must have known tapings were winding down, man. He went for it in this episode.

ER: I love all the backseat of a limo scenes with Dario, and they're only better with Godfrey. I don't know who they can get to be the cigar smoking boss, but considering the programming on El Rey can we PLEASE make it Fred Williamson? We all know everyone in power is a rich old white man, so LU needs to flip the script and present us a rich old black man as the one in charge. If it's Fred Williamson I will happily go back and watch every second of every single Sexy Star moment, and not complain.

TL: Fred Williamson is awesome, but considering he’s done voiceovers for WWE highlight packages before, I’d look at the budget and just not pull ANY punches: KEITH. DAVID. MAKE IT HAPPEN, CHAVO. I NEED Keith on this show, man. Also, I love how in the span of two mintues, Dario adds two more matches I’m actually fine with for Ultima Lucha in the three-way and the ladder match. He might be getting it back just in time for the biggest show of the year, baby.


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Lucha Underground Season 3 Episode 35: Cien

ER: I cannot believe there has been 100 episodes of this show, and I really can't believe that I have officially written about 100 episodes of this show. My goodness that is a lot of words written about Lucha Underground, with 3 different people. Props to Tim for crossing this threshold with me.

TL: Happy to have been here for the handful I’ve done. Always loved the work Eric, Phil, Matt, and all the other contributors have done on the site. I am definitely stunned that this show made it to 100 episodes in a way. Makes me wonder how many other feds could do 100 episodes of wrestling with such huge variations of quality. Hell, CWF Mid-Atlantic is blowing this out of the water on a regular basis and they’re about to do episode 150.

Sexy Star/Fenix/Cage/Prince Puma vs. Taya/PJ Black/Johnny Mundo/Marty "The Moth" Martinez

ER: This match had a comical amount of "I make your partner do a move to you" goofy mousetrap offense, but I liked it. It was just a 6 minute atomicos match but had a lot to like with all the goofiness happening. I liked all the moments where Mundo uses Taya as operation human shield, like rushing to tag her in when Cage gets into the match, or blatantly throwing her right into a big Cage lariat so that he is in a better position to attack Cage. The double teams were all goofy but they fit well into the match just because they were pulled off seamlessly, with both Puma pulling out some ridiculous combos, a crazy spinkick out of something that started like an armdrag, a big springboard kick, plenty of fun bits. We get a couple good DDTs, both Moth and Puma really took them on the side of their heads, really outside of Moth having to bump around for Sexy Star this was plenty fun. Also looking forward to Crane/Cage if it ends up happening as more than just a backstage beatdown.

TL: So, this is some really basic quibbling with wrestling booking. Okay. You have Fenix in a blood feud with Marty that is building to an apuestas match. Marty starts off the match with Sexy Star. He shows ass and basically has to tumble to his corner for a tag because he can’t handle Sexy Star. So this means, with Fenix going to a standstill with PJ Black in the next section of this match…that Sexy is being booked stronger than all three of them? Really? I just wanted to expand on Eric’s point about Marty bumping around for her because it’s just one of those things that seems really out of place with all the stories they’re trying to tell in this match. When everyone pairs off into the feuds they’re in at the end, it’s really fun, and I dug Puma doing a gainer off Mundo’s springboard kick. Looked really sick. A good little match, if not something that felt rushed.

TL: I’m such a huge fan of the corny-ass backstage segments that LU has. It’s really amazing that they even exist in a universe where Being the Elite is also a thing. I’ll take this overacting over tongue-in-cheek inside references at wrestlers being better than “The establishment” any day of the week. Also, if it becomes a three-way between Muertes/Cage/Crane, I’m in. Just don’t give Crane a bat.

Dragon Azteca Jr. vs. Pentagon Dark

ER: They're keeping the matches to 6-7 minutes this episode, which keeps things fast and avoids bloat. You know you're likely not getting a great match, but you don't get guys working themselves into corners either. I thought this was really fun, even though I'm bearish on Pentagon he's still a really nice base for Azteca, and I loved all of Azteca's crazy height and balance he would display, every time Pentagon would toss him into the air. Him landing on his feet on the top was super impressive, and I loved him getting tossed up onto the stage and running back and immediately hitting a beautiful rana to the floor. Azteca hit a big skytwister press to the floor not long before that, and back in they did some nicely done sexy dance fighting. Pentagon would cut off Azteca when he got too cute (like making him pay for a handspring attempt by hitting a double stomp), and the package piledriver was nicely planted. Azteca gets launched a few times postmatch by Matanza, a sure curse when an employer knows how great you take big throw offense. This episode is nice and brisk.

TL: One of my favorite things in lucha when I first started watching it was Hector Garza’s tornillo. It was so amazingly graceful and also looked like it completely wiped you out when it landed. Azteca hits a great one here, mainly aided by the camera angle, but it also gave me a reason to talk about one of my favorite moves. This is better than most Pentagon matches this season because Azteca’s offense is good and Penta knows how to take it, and Penta can be a good transition guy. Azteca landing on top in an ode to early Rey stuff was awesome, as was Penta hitting the Fear Factor to finish off it. Matanza tossing around people never gets old.

Matanza vs. Rey Mysterio

ER: Good match, as you'd expect. Rey sticks and moves until Matanza sticks him, and then we get a nice long Matanza beatdown, slamming the back of Rey's head into various surfaces, clawing at his eyes, cutting him off with a nice straight leg big boot, Rey tries to tangle him in the ropes and Matanza keeps beating on him with Vader-like full arm blows. The Code Red was a nice comeback and then we go a classic Rey run, big springboard senton and legdrop, big DDT, Matanza gets a chair kicked into his face in nasty fashion a couple times (I wonder how hard front of his mask really is? It doesn't seem pliable but I'm not sure it's protective), and I love Matanza finally just taking Rey out at the knees with the chair. End run was big with a couple large Matanza throws, a nice missed charge into the post, but Rey moonsaulting into the Wrath of the Gods. This match didn't necessarily seem like a huge deal, which is a shame since you had without a doubt the biggest wrestling star in the company versus a murderer who has never been beaten in a straight match, but in a vacuum the two of them matched up predictably well.

TL: Rey’s barrage to start this was fantastic and really made the match have a sense of urgency that can sometimes be missing in LU. Of course, Matanza is a great base for Rey’s offense, including snapping over on a springboard rana with a tight window. The baseball slide Rey bump is one of my favorite lucha bumps ever, right up there with the Estrada bump. Matanza just slamming Rey into whatever he finds appealing is great stuff, just overpowering him in every way possible. The Code Red off the top was nasty as all hell and a great way to get Rey back into it. Why does Matanza need a chair, though???? As Eric said, he’s literally killed a guy. Like he needs a damn chair. The rotating German Suplex is still an awe-inspiring spot even though I’ve seen it done so many times. Cool finish and I liked that Cueto made sure Matanza won. I do think it was treated like a big deal, but it didn’t get the pageantry that you expect from a monumental episode since it was rushed into from the previous match. It was definitely worked like a big match, and I liked the postmatch beatdown with the chair more than the chair stuff during the match due to there being more intent there, but I’ll like anything these two do together, really.

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Lucha Underground Season 3 Episode 33: Havoc Running Wild

TL: Really enjoy when Dario can show off the acting chops, as he gets all into making Rey vs. Matanza finally happen. As well he should.

Son of Madness vs. Mascarita Sagrada

ER: Quick match to set up the main event, which is fine as I don't have tons of interest seeing Sagrada face guys in a singles match. Havoc runs out to jump Madness, which isn't very honorable. Madness wasn't unprofessional during or after the match, feels weird for Dario to give Havoc a chance at an Aztec medallion. And they clearly had tons of ideas for Madness, as they brought him in, immediately had he and Havoc fight...then nothing until bringing him back a couple months later to fight Havoc again. We don't really know WHY Madness has it out for Havoc, other than they dress the same and he's the only guy we've seen him against. This is pretty dumb.

TL: Mascarita Sagrada wearing a biker vest is one of the most Lucha Underground things ever. Very happy they didn’t have him come out on a Big Wheel, which is something I would have 100% expected. Madness needed a win somehow, and a regular old vertical suplex (it was supposed to be a brainbuster, but it looked like a damn suplex more than anything else) gets the job done. I GUESS there had to be a blowoff between Madness and Havoc, but did anyone really want it?

Marty "The Moth" Martinez vs. Argenis

ER: I really liked the Argenis/Pentagon Dark match (from Ep. 22, the last time we saw Argenis), and especially like Argenis in that match. His stock continues to rise as he works another match that - just like that Pentagon match - could have been a squash match but instead was turned into something more memorable and meaningful due to Argenis. Here he bumps big for all of Moth's big slams, and I loved his comeback, snagging Moth's foot during a leapfrog to make him faceplant, then kicking him in the chest while he recovers. Argenis hits a big flip dive (and I still get scared thinking someone is going to bust open the back of their head on those temple steps) and a nice rana on the floor. Mariposa throws him into the post, and he takes a nice post bump, and comes up bleeding. We don't actually get a lot of blood in this fed (or wrestling in general anymore), so it really made the match feel like a bigger deal to me, and made Argenis look tougher for lasting as long as he did. I'm game for a Fenix/Moth Mascara contra Caballera.

TL: I don’t know when Argenis became one of the better transition guys in Lucha Underground, but he wrestles the way I want guys to transition on offense. He comes up with nifty ways to get back on offense from basic things (huge sucker for a trip off a leapfrog attempt) and then, as Eric says, he’ll bump HUGE to feed the heel. It’s really basic stuff, but he does it in really great ways. I mentioned Dario’s acting chops earlier, but the cutaways to Melissa saying, “Marty! What are you DOING?” is cringe-inducing. Argenis bleeds buckets because he just wants us to like him that much more before Marty finishes him off. Really happy to see Marty booked like an honest-to-God rudo and actually make him bleed and take a mask. An apuestas match I can really get behind.

Joey Ryan vs. Sexy Star

ER: How does the sound effects guy sleep at night after adding those ridiculous sounds to Sexy Star's slaps? She knows her way around some awful offense (I cannot think of someone with a worse legdrop), but I did really like her throwing Ryan by his chest hair. Striker gets all giddy talking about areolas, but the joke was her clearly throwing Ryan by grabbing clumps of his chest hair. I didn't hate this. I expected to hate this. That has to count for something.

TL: So Sexy Star gets 80% of the match, and then eats a superkick and loses. And when Joey DOES win, Striker calls it “The biggest win of his LU career.” I also expected to hate this more, but it was just there. That’s better than most Sexy Star matches I can talk about.

Boyle Heights Biker Brawl: Son of Madness vs. Son of Havoc

ER: The feud that continues, for reasons we might never know! I really liked the first half of this, both guys took dangerous bumps to the floor, stiff trash can shots, Madnes hits an insane slingshot double stomp to the floor (and Havoc was not lying close to the ring, Madness really went a long way to stomp a hole in him), Havoc getting shoved into the crowd, Madness bumping down the riser seating, big dive from Havoc. All of that kind of stuff has contributed to the best kinds of LU brawls. So I really loved all the stuff that went to the floor, but I didn't love a lot of the stuff in ring. Havoc has really weak offense, which tends to look weaker - and sillier - in the middle of a wild brawl. The driver on the trash can was pretty rough, but the stuff with a hammer and beer bottle just comes off ridiculous. If they had given me some more reason to actually care about why Havoc was willing to hit another guy in the face with a bottle, it could have been a major moment, but other than knowing that these two likely have some kind of a past, that's all we know. They've had two matches, the second one ending with a bottle to the face. It feels like I should know more about those motivations.

TL: That double stomp over the top to the floor made my eyes wide. That’s a ridiculous idea and it looked absolutely rough as all hell. A lot of this stuff looked reckless, which adds to the fact that it’s a street fight. The footprints on the back from the Havoc double stomp was a cool aesthetic. The back body drop into the steel grating was sick. It does lose a lot going back into the ring considering what the first part of this match brought on, and Havoc bouncing around as if he didn’t take a bunch of punishment is par for the course for him. At least the Mushroom Stomp looked good this time. This ended up being a good match, but they could have done a lot more if they made the end of the match look more like the first half of the match.

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Lucha Underground Season 3 Episode 26: A Fenix to a Flame

ER: Okay, so the first round of the most innovative single elimination #1 contender tournament in wresting history was kind of a bust. It had a memorable Paul London performance and I liked Pentagon/Argenis. That's...not a lot to come out of 4 weeks and 16 matches. Here's hoping we get some burners in the late rounds.

TL: Stoked that Vampiro doesn’t have Arau’s name to mispronounce now. Truly feels like a step forward in the commentary of the promotion.

1. Jeremiah Crane vs. Taya

ER: Really fun match, felt like they played the battle of the sexes at just the right level. Taya didn't take 75% of the match like every awful Sexy Star vs. Male matches, and what she did take felt earned. Her and Crane shouldn't be going tit for tat, and my favorite moment was the way Taya bailed and crumbled during a slap exchange. Once I saw them squaring up for a strike exchange I was fully prepared to eyeroll, but they handled it great with Taya slapping him around and then Crane blitzing her with far harder smacks and she immediately goes down. Taya can really take a mean beating, Crane didn't have to hold back, and there was some wild stuff: Crane hits his low tope suicida, cannonballs her into the chairs, Crane kicks her (har har). Taya gets in some logical comebacks, with a big furry boot to the balls making the most sense to block the facewash. She was nuts for taking some of this stuff, and the match benefitted greatly for it.

TL: Man, forgot where JC was billed from, as “The Last House on the Left” just doesn’t jive. Also, a fan in the crowd has a Rick Knox t-shirt, which, well, what ref t-shirts would you want to own? Tommy Young? Joe Higuchi? Definitely not a Hebner. Definitely not a Red Shoes. Anyways, this match begins on the outside a lot like the Killshot match and Taya already sells the beating way better than Killshot, especially considering she slapped him to start. I also like how Taya came back by outsmarting Crane with the balcony work, because in essence, the way this match is booked, she being a part of the Worldwide Underground means she can have some kind of tactical advantage. And the counter off the running boot is FANTASTIC. Took me a moment to figure out what happened, but man, this is a great match. The other part is that even though Taya is tactically sound, she’s also vain, which leads to her downfall in some ways. Don’t like her last minute counter after the powerbomb for the nearfall, but otherwise, I REALLY liked this match, and Taya’s selling and facial expressions were fantastic. Feel like she’s underrated, but that might be me being in the wrong circle, too.

TL: Aerostar being a time traveler makes me wonder why they don’t do some type of gimmick where he’s the LU bookie. I mean, we’re talking about a fed run by a dude who has hidden several murders in his life, including cops and government officials. You can’t tell me Aerostar being the LU bookie would be beneath this promotion.

2. Mil Muertes vs. Paul London

ER: Okay, 2nd round matches are delivering just fine so far. London pulls out all the stops against Muertes, Muertes gets to come off invincible by surviving tons of London's biggest moves and run-ins from his flunkies. I will say that after all that, the flatliner is a pretty weak "death move", but it's a testament to Muertes that he can make some 1999 offense like a spear/flatliner combo seem plausible as a death move. London is almost a decade removed from WWE and bumping as big as ever. And the rolling heel kick out of the corner is lands rougher than most flashy kicks. London superkicks Muertes around the entire ring, and why is LU so damn inconsistent with their one SLAP sound effect. London's first 5 kicks had the exact same sound effect, but then they don't use it on the 6th? Why use it on almost every strike, but then skip one? It already sounds ridiculous, but it sounds far more ridiculous to make every strike sound exactly the same, and then suddenly have one delivered in dead silence. The multiple superkicks are kind of silly, but I like how London kept stumbling his way into delivering them, and loved the payoff of Mil finally catching one and clotheslining his head off. London can still hit the SSP better than maybe anyone, and I like the Tribe's interference made it seem like London could feasibly advance. 2nd round is definitely 2/2 so far.

TL: I’m here for the cat and mouse game and Paul London taking crazy ass bumps for Mil’s power offense. The cat and mouse game was cute. The flip bump off the tackle was nuts. I actually buy London being on something to start the match, only for Mil to whoop him up so much that he comes to a bit and that’s how he makes his comebacks. Striker makes a “Dick Trickle” joke and I groan. I actually dug the London Ode to the Massie Brothers superkick barrage on the outside for its goofiness. The mushroom stomp is also an awesome move that I wish other folks would use more often. The Mil chokeslam is suitably gnarly here. And then the spear and the Flatliner (which London, a crazy person, takes like a DDT) finishes a fun match. Muertes rules.

TL: Never thought we’d actually see a cuckold situation on LU with the Famous B/Texano stuff but here we are. I mean, it's not 100% confirmed that Brenda and B are an item, but c'mon, if you're B, you have to at least try, right? Brenda’s right though: Texano’s dull.

3. Marty the Moth Martinez vs. Fenix

ER: Another winner, even with the...acting...abilities of Melissa Santos on display towards the end. Fenix made up for the size difference by picking shots, landing big kicks (a spinkick right under the chin and a full extension superkick looked great), big dives, and using speed to make Moth miss him and bump. Marty takes a predictably Marty bump to the floor after charging and missing, flipping through the ropes and splatting on the floor. I definitely like Moth more as a guy taking offense, as he's big but lands hard, and takes nice appropriate flops and tumbles off big strikes. His offense could be a bit more simple, there's always a lot of steps to his slams, but they always land big. He hits a german early and could use more simple suplexes, instead we get a crucifix into a Gory special into a dominator that sees him also take a back bump and land Fenix onto his knees...it reads as complicated as it sounds, but the end result usually looks good. I also like how Moth is always in character during pinfalls, kind of oozing onto his opponent. Finish is silly with Santos stopping more Mariposa interference like a mother telling her kids to behave at the market ("Stop it! You stop it!") but this match was killer. An easy 3/3 for the 2nd round so far.

TL: I get that Santos is cute and there’s a bit of a following there with LU fans but she’s not doing it for me in this little angle. Marty’s schizo athleticism plays up here with a guy like Fenix, who just does crazy things for fun. Mariposa is a great second here, which shouldn’t come as any surprise. This is also some really good traditional rudo work by Martinez with the mask ripping and just general nastiness. Fenix has some great comebacks, and that springboard spinning back kick in the corner was absolutely ridiculous and worthy of the ridiculous sound effect. Fenix also must have read my review of the last match because he does his own mushroom stomp variation and I pop like crazy for it. Mothra is convoluted as all hell but Fenix took it very nastily. In fact, I like a lot of Marty’s indyriffic offense looks because he looks like a killer against a guy like Fenix. Santos only being able to say “Stop it!” is basically Skinemax/Hallmark Channel-level acting and it somehow leads to Fenix moving on. The postmatch payoff makes sense since Santos got involved, but as far as Marty using a fork is concerned, he really needs to watch some Abby in Puerto Rico for proper usage.

ER: This was my favorite episode in some time, the wrestling all delivered and the flow was good. This actually got me interested in the tourney, which I had not been until now.

TL: So this seems like a tourney where LU had 20 guys they wanted to showcase but didn’t want to hand out a bunch of byes. Which means that after the first round, it was going to get good. Pro wrestling tournaments are hard to mess up, and it looks like this one is hitting its stride. Like I said a few shows ago though: They’re really telegraphing the winner in a lot of ways, but at the same time, I’m intrigued to see how they get there and see if they play with those expectations going forward. It’s the least they can do and they’re doing it well.

Also, Eric and I are totally in sync in this show in a scary way and we wrote our reviews separately, so that goes to show you just how good we thought this episode was after quite the barrage of stinkers.

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Lucha Underground Season 3 Episode 23: Family First

ER: My gosh you guys! Fenix and Melissa Santos are getting steamyyyyyyyy. They were acting like cute high school kids, with Fenix cruising up in his custom Camaro (I have to imagine the highway patrol would not recommend driving in a mask, as your peripheral vision is of utmost importance on the road) and suddenly the garage gets super windy as Melissa's hair swoops around. These wild eyed kids.

TL: I think what makes this unbelievable to me is that Fenix would drive that type of car, although it does vibe with Eric’s description of literally every movie we grew up watching depicting high school romance. If Fenix was wearing a jean jacket, I would have thought it was too on the nose. Marty is still psychotic, don’t you know. Don’t get why you have to bang your head through glass to prove it, but there you have it. Psychotic Marty Martinez. Psychomoth. Okay, how come he wasn’t just Psychomoth from the start?!? Shoutouts to Melissa for the wardrobe change before the opener.

1. Vinny Massaro vs. Cage

ER: Glad to see Massaro in an actual match, and it was a fun one. Vinny has always been able to crack a jaw with a forearm, and he blasts Cage a few times here. Cage is a beast and leans in to everything, all of Vinny's lariats and elbows, and throws back. Vinny works in one of my favorite spots from his old trainer Mike Modest, when Cage tries to slingshot him back in the ring Vinny just lets go of the ropes and gives Cage an eyepoke (Modest would usually throw a forearm). But Cage catches a lariat and slams Vinny on the apron. I liked Vinny's hope comeback and liked how the Temple crowd was getting into it. Naturally he goes for the Power Glove, misses, and Cage spikes him with the screwdriver. Postmatch Vinny gets busted open and chokeslammed from the ring to the floor. Vinny does not do well in Lucha Underground post match.

TL: Vinny Mass out here taking it to Cage and getting some offense in! He lights up Cage a bit with some nice forearms and then even gets a nice STO. With Cage basically on one leg, this is at least fun, especially to see Cage power through it to make some of this stuff work. Vinny took some pretty sick bumps, including the aforementioned chokeslam, where he really took a nasty fall. So sad to see the pride of Sicily go so soon.

TL: I’m now starting to see what Eric was talking about with these voiceovers, as the cheesiness is definitely apparent. Mundo going the full Johnny Lawrence is inspired, though.

2. Marty the Moth Martinez vs. Saltador

ER: Not loving how Saltador-heavy this match was, as working the LSD gimmick basically just means a sorta boring wrestler now also wrestles badly. It doesn't really work. And Moth isn't really a good style match for him, as they both brought out bad aspects of each other. It's fun watching Moth bump around for armdrags and run into a superkick, but he's a big guy and I like him more against other big guys. Here instead of throwing bombs and big bumps he broke out a bunch of indy offense, like a big silly chokeslam into his own knees while he takes a back bump. That stuff is almost always dumb. The powerbomb into the railing was sick, but didn't seem to mean anything to the context of the match.

TL: Saltador going full on tripped out World of Sport chain wrestling madness is going to get a win from me, even if I’m not a big fan of the mind games shtick. I get the disconnect Eric is talking about, but at least he’s playing up to the gimmick. Striker playing up the sensuality and Marty getting turned on by the violence just makes me shake my head, though. This match made me feel a bunch of different weird ways. It had some decent Marty offense. And the postmatch stalker collage is a bit much, but hey, character development!

3. Pindar vs. Mascarita Sagrada

ER: Pindar was a good choice for this match, as I'm both excited to see him advance (although I was half expecting them to let Sagrada advance improbably far in this tournament) and get more singles matches, but he's also a good base for Sagrada's insanity. Throw all logic out the window and just accept that a super sturdy guy is going to be taking flip bumps for a 60 pound man. Sagrada hits a nutso flip dive rana through the ropes and slaps Kobra Moon. Vampiro - I assume quoting Trump at a recent campaign rally - says he "slapped the bitch out of her". Pindar hits him with a stiff yakuza kick and an amusing flapjack cutter. Pindar was also benevolent enough to not recklessly destroy the little guy.

TL: Pindar continues to be one of the best bases in LU history by being right there for all of Mascarita’s offense and hitting some really nice power offense. He even does the damn Harley Race/Brock Lesnar high knee bump in the corner and I am all in. The Sagrada tope suicida con Dragonrana is an insane spot. And then he does the rope walk diving rana to the outside. The Pyramid Driver into the flapjack to finish by Pindar was ridiculous. This was very fun professional wrestling to watch.

4. Mariposa vs. Fenix

ER: This is probably the best showing in LU for Mariposa, which is a sentence that probably nobody cares about. Vampiro says "Mariposa has been beaten down all her life," which...is not something that has ever actually been implied in any of the Mariposa sketches. I assume Vampiro does not actually watch these shows. But Mariposa looked good, and Fenix is a nut getting spiked on a tornado DDT. Mariposa gets a nice rana to the floor, but really the match was pretty inconsequential. Moth comes out after and Fenix hits a wild dive on everybody.

TL: Mariposa seems extremely underutilized when Sexy F’n Star is getting all that run and she shows again why in this match, pulling out some fun as all hell offense and going toe to toe with Fenix with the highly contrived lucha sequences. I like that she got a bunch of offense in at least, but it was a sudden finish. Bleh way to end just to get to that dive.

ER: Is this tournament going to take place over the rest of the season? Tying up 32 guys like this seems like a really bad idea. I'm sure things will pick up a bit once we get through these first round matches, but we still have EIGHT first round matches to go. That's just too much. And tying up this much time on a cup that looks as silly as that really shows a major lack from the props department. Is this whole thing literally for just a title shot? Dario has stopped random matches to give title shots before. Now he wants to tie up 3 months of TV to reward one? This ranks right at the bottom of Dario ideas.

TL: Quick math shows that they have to go two more weeks for the first round, two more weeks for the second round, then maybe one more week for the third round? So five weeks at least? That’s a lot of tournament to watch, and I love me some tournaments. This might be a chore, though. We’ll get through this, my friend. Together.

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Lucha Underground Season 3 Episode 14: The Bulls of Boyle Heights

MD: I could watch Dario backstage with people all day. Angelico doesn't portray a tough guy well at all, but there's enough weight built up in his grudge with Mundo from time alone that all of this works. I like that he has to go through one more hoop to get to him. I swear that 2017 WWE wouldn't think through a character enough to run with the Bull theme with Dario like they're doing here. It's obvious that his plan was having Angelico and Matanza in the 4 way next week.

1. Cage vs. Texano vs. Joey Ryan vs. Dr. Wagner Jr.

ER: Oh good, I was hoping we'd get some additional Cage/Texano interactions outside of their best of 27 series. And this got a decent amount of time. And was not very good. We did get a lot of Texano/Cage interactions, which we've already seen just...way too much of, and it's still not working. When Texano is announced, Striker said, "One word: GREAT." Texano may have the biggest gap in "actual output in promotion" versus "how promotion wants him to be perceived" in the fed...if it weren't for one TINYYYYYY person in LU illustrating that same thing times 10. Wagner is one of the most charismatic men I've ever seen live, and I'm wondering why it's not coming through on LU. Is it because they want you to think everybody is a big charismatic star? Is it the differences in lucha filming vs. professional high end LU filming? Is he just being portrayed here like "just another guy"? Is it because he was saddled with Famous B - who is amusing in his role but makes a legitimate star like Wagner come off as bottom rung? Wagner still moves like a star, still seems like he has that charisma, but the way they're using him it could really be anybody under that mask. Cage looked pretty impressive here, that moonsault to the floor was nuts (and everybody was nuts for standing right under it), and for what felt like a throwaway match (even though it's part of a larger match concept) Cage came off pretty big here.

MD: This was a typical Lucha Underground multiman. You can't help but contrast it to the match later in the night and while that one had more fun character interactions, this was less stilted and choreographed. I thought both Cage and Texano came off pretty well here, actually. There's zero hook to Texano in lucha underground and generally seeing him here just makes me wish he was teaming with Terrible in CMLL still, but he stood tall against everyone for a decent amount of time. I get what Eric's saying though. I think the problem with Wagner in LU is that he doesn't really get to be Wagner. Everything about this promotion plays against his strengths. He's not a guy who can just come in and hit spots endlessly and then get out of the ring so the next person can take over. It's those dead spaces between spots where he can play to the crowd and make things mean something (or not mean something in a way that makes him look good, which is a Wagner special) where he excels. Even Vampiro pointed out that this wasn't really Wagner's style of match. These things were made for Cage to hit spots though. He was physically astonishing in this match, to the point where I stopped really caring whether or not this was good. Catching Ryan in mid-air and jackhammering him is insanely impressive. It was nice to see the rope come back into play for the finish as it had annoyed me how little its use mattered in the match itself.

MD: The second she told Reyes that he had to go back to the Temple, I was rooting for her to put him under a mask. That they're actually going with that shows how on point this show can be at times.

2. Sexy Star vs. PJ Black

ER: "You can't help but get behind Sexy Star!" You might think that was the case, Striker, but I suppose I just despise poor downtrodden women. That's something about ME that needs work. After all, if I can't get behind this one brave woman, who am I, and what wrong steps have *I* taken as a human? But this match was probably upper tier for Sexy Star. She has no idea how to transition, and no idea how to make up the size difference, and sometimes it's pretty clear she doesn't know how to fall for certain moves, but Black at least knew how to build to her bigger spots and they crafted a nice nearfall off the Styles Clash kickout. I liked Star's rana, and I liked PJ bragging on the top rope to set up his huge nasty drop onto the turnbuckles, and yeah, this was fine. You know she's going to win, and you know the commentary is going to be ridiculously over the top while praising her contributions to the history of womankind, but the match overall worked.

MD: In general, I wish they just moved Star over to Taya. If this had to happen, hwoever, I'm with Eric that the match overall did work. Most of that was on Black, his arrogance (including cheating when he didn't even have to), and is general unwillingness to sell for her unless she really earned it. He seemed to be putting an extra bit of oomph into everything too, which is not something people do with her. I came out of this wondering if I haven't been undervaluing Black. It's a shame he keeps injuring himself on basejumps or whatever. All that said, I'll be honest: I tend to watch Sexy Star matches at 2x speed, so my views on them are suspect.

ER: So Kobra Moon of all people is getting her own stable of reptilians? They're now building her up as some sort of millennia-long leader, when up til now all she's done is lose short matches and flirt with boys. It's a long con, people.

MD: I was wondering how this meshed with her and Daga from last season too. I think the line is that she ate him whole? Still, I'm all for the expansion of the mythos, and even more so the fact that they rationalized spending the money to actually make a GiJoe Serpentor throne in 2017.

3. Marty the Moth Martinez vs. Dragon Azteca Jr. vs. The Mack vs. Mil Muertes

ER: This didn't end the way I was expecting it to, as with the participants I assumed this would be a guaranteed path for Mil Muertes. And Muertes looked pretty awesome in this, loved his big uppercuts, and the showdown with Moth. Moth standing up to him and getting clocked in the jaw, then later speared through the ropes was terrific. Azteca and Mack matched up nicely, and that tornado DDT Azteca hits is insane. The ending was pretty stupid, with Azteca getting almost a visual pinfall on Muertes, then goes up to hit something else, waits there forever for the Matanza run-in (couldn't they have edited that closer together), and then other people just kill time being inactive while Matanza does his thing. His ragdoll slamming of Azteca was cool, but didn't love how it played into the match, with Mack then kind of just vulturing the win.

MD: As much as I liked Marty interacting with everyone, there was a heck of a lot of him putting his head down for a while so Azteca could leap over him or just hanging out so that he could eat that big spear shot off the apron. Him staring down Mil like a madman was the best part of this. Mil looked a step above everyone else. The guy just exudes star power in this gimmick. He moves just a little slower than everyone but everything feels so deliberate and impactful. Again, I did like how Azteca hit his crazy spinning DDT the first time and then got destroyed on the second. The show uses blood relatively sparingly so seeing Dario come out with the gimmick was a striking moment. I can't wait for Rey vs Matanza. I can wait to see Mack and Cage up against each other again considering they just did that towards the end of last season.


COMPLETE LUCHA UNDERGROUND EPISODE GUIDE

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