Lucha Underground Season 4 Episode 5: Sacrificio

TL: Vampiro Fashion Update: Palm Beach, Florida area retiree who spends every afternoon during the week at a Perkin’s knockoff for happy hour.

Cortez Castro vs. Matanza

ER: Castro's identity as a cop is now common knowledge (though it was amusing to see people in the Temple reacting to Cueto's news with shock). It feels like we've known this for several years now, and now we know that a Cueto knows, and really that should have lead to an in-ring murder. The fact that newly re-monstered Matanza did not murder an undercover cop in the Temple feels a bit like, ahem, a cop out.

TL: So, let me get this straight: Papa Cueto knew he was a cop? And had sources? And didn’t tell his son? Cold-blooded. But hey, it leads to Matanza almost over-rotating on a Wrath of the Gods. Pay windah. Don’t get paid by the hour. If you love something, don’t do it for free. (In this case, the thing Matanza loves is murder) These are all sayings that make sense for this match.

Joey Ryan vs. Ivelisse

ER: Glad we can edit in absurd sound effects for Ivelisse's strikes, but we can't edit out a guy trying to start a "Suck his dick" chant. Eva Lease pulls off the Eva Marie look much better than Eva Marie, looks cool on her. I'm over Joey Ryan's shtick, and I'm pretty over intergender matches, and I'm completely over intergender matches with Joey Ryan. So we get plenty of attention on Ryan's lollipop getting placed in his trunks, we get a zoom in on Ivelisse's during an armbar, we get Joey trying to make Ivelisse touch his dick and later we get Ryan trying to force her to lick his lollipop. Derp derp derp. The wrestling within the match was fine, I like Ivelisse's energy and there were a couple fun lucha spots, but the size difference stuff does make it a little silly. Eh, it was fine.

TL: I’m trying to think of a match I don’t look forward to more than a Joey Ryan intergender match in 2018. I know that amongst the wrestlers of today, he’s very much respected because of the business he was able to bring in while working a super safe style, but it’s also a style that gets old very quickly. Plus, penis druids. Penis druids. An actual line said by Matt Striker in this match: “Ivellise reminding me of Antonio Inoki!” If there’s anything to take away in this match, I liked the suddenness of the finish. That’s all I got.

Killshot vs. Son of Havoc vs. The Mack

ER: Tecnico trios champs forced to fight each other in a triple threat in Lucha Underground? This doesn't sound like anything we've seen before! I warmed to this as the match went on, especially once Mack went on a rampage. Mack really should be at world title level, and really should be in NXT, and really would get over on the main brand. It's only a matter of time. He was awesome here, wiggling his belly while doing a top rope headstand, obliterating Havoc with a pounce (great sideways bump from Havoc too), hits a big dive, awesome high kick on Killshot, really just adds a ton of excitement to a match when he's flying around. Killshot as a character and as a wrestler I don't really get, his stuff looks more awkward than cool to me, and the character is just underbaked. Havoc is a really good guy to have in a match like this, so he's probably an undervalued guy in that sense (since LU loves this type of match). Glad Mack got the win.

TL: I like the stipulation of two medallions up for grabs because it actually puts an emphasis on not getting pinned, which makes the match more aggressive as a whole. It also, hilariously, makes the three-way stuff start to make sense: Nobody wants to be the guy on the wrong side of anything. The only time I enjoyed an opening mirror sequence in LU. You can tell Eric and I think much higher of Mack than LU does, it seems. But hey, gotta make sure Callihan keeps getting chances, I guess. As he normally does, Mack is the highlight of the match, but this time, my cynicism with a splash of optimism is not necessary because Mack actually wins???? Really hope he wins the belt and gets another shot. Loved the ending, too. Weird for me to come out of a three-way thinking it wasn’t anything more than eh, but this wasn’t too bad at all.

Mil Muertes vs. Cage

ER: Looking at the current LU roster and there might not be another match I'd want to see more, and it's kind of nuts that these two have only matched up a couple times. We could have a total hoss feud, if this match and their trios last season (with Crane) are any indication. This felt like their take on a 1999 Attitude era match (though I guess this whole fed is their take on 1999 Attitude era stuff, so...), with ref bumps from multiple refs, man hiding in crowd interference, and garbage spots. The real meat of the match was both guys showing off how hard they could hit the other, showing off strength spots, and showing off flying spots. We get a bunch of cool full force shoulderblocks and lariats that get shrugged off, Cage shows off a nice rana and Muertes shows off right back with a cool headscissors. Cage hits a big flip dive, Muertes is great at flying into walls, and the powerlift suplex from the middle rope is always awesome. All the stuff with guys hitting the ref worked for me, because the refs all took an absolute freaking thrashing. Muertes wrecks a guy with a spear, Cage hits his fullspeed 360 lariat right into the neck of another, Rick Knox takes a Muertes' chokeslam in brutal fashion; googling Rick Knox to make sure I had his name correct, I saw that he had surgery due to a broken collarbone suffered during the tapings...and this had to be it right? For his sake I hope he didn't have to endure anything worse than this. Pentagon was hiding in plain sight in the crowd to jump Cage, which would have looked stupid in most other settings but I liked it here. Wouldn't mind seeing this match like half a dozen more times.

TL: Super weird to think this is the first time in LU they’ve faced off one on one, but I also hope this is more like a Muertes match instead of a Cage match. Then two minutes in and I regret saying that. They’re just full throttle from the get-go and nothing slows down. The way they trade stuff totally works, and when they show off the power stuff against each other, it’s really awe inspiring. Cage’s outside in superplex was effortless here. I like the ref stuff, and poor Rick Knox lands HARD on the awesome Muertes chokeslam. I loved the Pentagon crowd reveal, something that truly came off as surprising and cool. Don’t know if we need to be seeing unprotected chairshots in 2018 but Penta can swing it. Cage spikes himself on the finishing flatliner. This was really fun, top flight Cage match, and for me, right there with the Cage/PCO match from Americanrana earlier this year. Penta doing the Ciampa wave was hilarious, and I don’t know how they do it, but I’m with Eric: More Cage/Muertes, please.

ER: I liked the vibe of the Rabbit Tribe video, and apparently Mascarita Sagrada got back this season just to be bludgeoned to death by Paul London and a big wooden club. Castro is the dude that needed an onscreen murder, it's weird to waste that visual on someone like Sagrada. I'm sure there was a chance that "this wasn't real, the Tribe was on a trip," but it still spoils that visual. And I'm not sure how they want people to view London going forward: LSD-soaked goofball who still dies on bumps? or is he a dangerous PCP-charged murderer who police found eating his roomates lungs out of his chest, screaming? I'm going to need to know. I want to know if there's a chance of him getting booked in a No DQ match and just murdering someone. I don't think we've had that happen on a wrestling program (I have not seen some 80s territory stuff, so don't know for sure).

TL: I still don’t know why Sagrada just stood there and let it happen, but the visual of London’s white suit getting blood splattered all over it is classic grindhouse stuff and just makes Paul look even more crazed than normal. This very much could be a Kevin Sullivan-in-Florida situation, but the in-ring violence has been very much your normal wrestling fare so far in LU outside of some deathmatches. I don’t know if we’re gonna have an Invader 3/Manny Fernandez-type incident on this show, but London’s the guy to do it with.


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Lucha Underground Season 3 Episode 36: The Rise of the Ring Announcer

ER: I really liked the opening Melissa Santos/Fenix segment, a lot. It came off like an updated take on Girlfight or something. The prior romantic scenes between Fenix/Santos came off silly, this came off downright steamy, like the George Clooney/Jennifer Lopez scenes in Out of Sight, or the Timothee Chalamet/Armie Hammer scenes in Call Me By Your Name. I thought their body language was really strong, loved the interplay of submissions, loved the sparring and grappling as metaphor for relationship dynamics, that gentle hair flop onto Fenix's face, thought all of it worked tremendously well. Now, if you think of it out of a vacuum it gets weirder, as you realize that Melissa Santos is going to be in the ring wrestling for the first time ever and they only announced it at the beginning of the episode where that was happening, and then you start thinking "Wait these two are locking in these tight go behinds and she's letting her hair seductively flop all over Fenix's face and...she hasn't even seen his face? This all seemed pretty intimate. It feels like they've been hanging out. And this whole time, during meals, during dates, during post training showers...Fenix has not removed that mask? How terrible must that mask smell?? Santos has let herself grow dangerously, emotionally close to a man who may have a Monster energy tattoo on his forehead for all she knows. But that's what thinking gets you. Follow your heart. The segment was good.

TL: I can’t even begin to top what Eric just said so my only addition to this, whether it was good editing or camera cuts or what have you, is that Santos looked like she could go!!! I all of a sudden am into whatever that tag match is gonna be. This was one of the best examples of female empowerment the show has ever portrayed because this was natural as opposed to shoved down our throats like Sexy Star was. Santos came off as a big deal with this, which is what wrestling promos are supposed to do!

Dante Fox vs. Texano

ER: I liked this more than I expected, and it's true that Fox is typically more interesting when he's against more of a power base than another athletic flipper. Texano can get really lazy during routine moments, looking like a somnambulist going through simple sequences like a lazy clothesline/back elbow sequence, but he excels here at making Fox look strong. When a guy throws a lazy clothesline you wouldn't expect him to throw himself into a crucifix bomb, and Texano is good at working around fast Fox sequences, like all of the stuff on the apron that eventually lead to the run-up-ringpost moonsault. The match was a good Worldwide length of 5-6 minutes, and even though it got too move trade-y down the stretch I was pleasantly surprised overall. Famous B botches (in storyline) the ending and calls Texano the winner, so Dario sets up B vs. Texano for next week. B says his arm is still broke from Pentagon and Dario FINALLY gets a classic Dario line in (feels like it's been WAY too long) when he says "Well then it looks like it will be a...handicap match!" Pure gold. Dario hasn't felt fully "Dario" this season, and comes off really ineffective and less the all powerful manipulator. That line was needed.

TL: Striker makes a “Clerks” joke (“I’m not even supposed to be here today”) because of Dante and not only does it make me feel old but reminds me that Kevin Smith almost died mere days ago. I thought this was alright, but not a standout or anything. Fox doing a faceplant on an enzuigiri was amusing and then became even moreso when he just went back on offense after taking a bump that looked like it would have killed him. I’ve talked about how Texano has basically looked disinterested ever since when he first came to LU with Alberto Del Rio and was used to put him over not only in LU, but in AAA, so this really does feel like he’s collecting a paycheck at this point. Agree with the line usage, but in Dario’s defense, he was in jail, man. He’s seen some shit. Just not the same guy anymore.

Marty "The Moth" Martinez/Mariposa vs. Fenix/Melissa Santos

ER: Still really surprised that this match wasn't announced at all in advance. Do they advertise? Maybe they advertise and this was announced. It feels like a pretty big match within the LU universe. And it was really fun, although after all the wins and big moments they gave to Sexy Star it's ridiculous that they can't give Santos a good moment. Moth has been licking and rubbing on her for a couple seasons now, and while she's a non-wrestler that never stopped Sexy Star from wrestling. Give her a fucking pinfall, who are we protecting here? Anyway Fenix works a nice match against the two, including hitting an actual good looking Lethal Injection and hitting a wild twisting dive to the floor. Santos getting into the match was a great moment, with Moth running into a perfectly timed high kick from the apron and the gets Irish whipped into elbow smashing Mariposa. The tandem offense didn't look great but the moment was still good.

TL: This WAS announced in advance, but Eric, much like me when I’m trying to burn through reviews, most likely fast-forwarded past the 20-second mention of it from a couple weeks ago by Striker and Vampiro. So…what I’m trying to say is that Eric made the right decision in skipping past how this match got announced in the first place. Striker says Fenix has a “legendary mask” like he’s Atlantis or something. Mariposa is so sudden with her offense, it’s amazing to think she’s been doing this for two decades. One thing in addition to Melissa doing the job in this match: There’s now absolutely no doubt that Marty is gonna lose. Had Melissa gotten a pin on Mariposa, at least you could have seen a more level playing field. Melissa’s offensive moments were definitely cool, but the way this ended was a bit too much.

ER: We get a rundown of the epic card for the 4 episode (!) Ultima Lucha extravaganza, which should make for plenty of fun. Although how absolutely ridiculous does Ivelisse vs. Catrina look at this point?? The last Ivelisse match aired 6 months before this episode, and Catrina has never wrestled in the fed. Does anyone watching even remember why they made that match?

TL: It’s a huge card, but to be honest, I’m really only looking forward to the main event, the cage match, and the Fox/Killshot match. There’s gonna be a lot of filler for me to get into.

Paul London vs. Mala Suerte vs. Saltador vs. Cortez Castro vs. Drago vs. Son of Havoc vs. Pentagon Dark

ER: This was a pretty cracking spotfest, one of the best Drago performances in awhile, a continuation of Paul London as an extremely relevant wrestler after a few years in the woods, some great Saltdaor stuff, just a ton of fun. Drago was the centerpiece of this whole thing, either tying things together and finding things to occupy time. I loved him sprinting across the ring after London leading to London doing his bananas springboard tope en reversa to the floor. he easily could have just stood there doing nothing since London was going to do the spot anyway, this made things feel more immediate. Saltador got some nice moments and I especially loved him getting backdropped into London (who was slumped in the corner). We got a couple big dives, everybody moved in and out of it smoothly, a couple nice saves, just a fun spotfest. We do get a dumbo ending with Havoc and Pentagon getting simultaneous pinfalls, but Dario comes out to announce a ladder match between the two, which is fine.

TL: I like that this match was basically laid out like an atomicos or a cibenertico, as it never really let up and gave everyone some shine. If you’re gonna do a damn seven way, you might as well take advantage and sprint. And yeah, they sprint, big time. London looks great in this match, like a true Droog. I wish he would talk shit in Cockney gibberish slang between moves. But my guy in this match? Saltador. All his offense looked crisp as all hell. He had this great springboard legdrop that looked snug when it landed and he had a great dive. Also looked great taking down Pentagon to start. I don’t like the ending either, a true bait and switch bullshit ending, but we got to see Dario yell “LADDER MATCH!” in a way that made me smile. He must have known tapings were winding down, man. He went for it in this episode.

ER: I love all the backseat of a limo scenes with Dario, and they're only better with Godfrey. I don't know who they can get to be the cigar smoking boss, but considering the programming on El Rey can we PLEASE make it Fred Williamson? We all know everyone in power is a rich old white man, so LU needs to flip the script and present us a rich old black man as the one in charge. If it's Fred Williamson I will happily go back and watch every second of every single Sexy Star moment, and not complain.

TL: Fred Williamson is awesome, but considering he’s done voiceovers for WWE highlight packages before, I’d look at the budget and just not pull ANY punches: KEITH. DAVID. MAKE IT HAPPEN, CHAVO. I NEED Keith on this show, man. Also, I love how in the span of two mintues, Dario adds two more matches I’m actually fine with for Ultima Lucha in the three-way and the ladder match. He might be getting it back just in time for the biggest show of the year, baby.


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Lucha Underground Season 3 Episode 34: Career Opportunities

ER: Slapbak is pretty much the house band at this point. Vampiro is trying to bang the girl in Slapbak, isn't he. Future Lucha Underground champion: Girl from Slapbak.

TL: Slapbak is no Tsunami Bomb, man. I’m all about Lucha Underground champion Emily Whitehurst, man. And then have Kristin McRory, mega-babyface, come after her for the belt. She can even be Agent M! This concludes our Petaluma, CA Phoenix Theater-based punk rock references for this review.

Drago vs. The Mack

ER: I thought Mack was really great in this. His armdrags and rollthroughs were really impressive, his throws look great, his demeanor is impressive. This is probably a really obvious observation, but this match just really opened my eyes to how underutilized Mack has been in LU. I know we've seen him used in higher profile spots, but we've mainly seen him as Sexy Star's best bud, and playing second fiddle to Sexy Star is just way below his level. The way he carried himself in this match made him feel bigger than most guys in the fed. I thought the ending was about as weak as you can get, though, with Drago hitting a dashed off kick combo and winning with his sloppiest ever rolling crucifix.

TL: A Mack showcase match that ends with seriously weak shenanigans to end the match leaves a sour taste in my mouth, no matter if he gets his heat back in the end. It’s obvious that he has basically found his niche as he has a true confidence to him that he didn’t have before. I have absolutely no idea how he hasn’t gotten any other ways to shine since the Johnny Mundo feud, and that’s one of the issues with such heavily pre-produced TV. You can’t really change things up midseason like that. Too bad. It’s almost like they have to wait until Season 4 to do something with him, and there, it might be too late.

Five-O Street Fight: Joey Ryan vs. Cortez Castro

ER: I'm already unexcited about this match, and almost immediately Striker has to turn it into a political statement, just wanting to make sure those boys in blue know that "some of us" really appreciate what they do for us. What a piece of shit. Vomiting all over a show with shoehorned references and blatantly overscripted jokes is one level of dogshit, but outing yourself as an All Lives Matter asshole is an even deeper ditch. I will just mute Striker for the rest of this. On mute these two do a pretty great job with a pretty goofy concept. I mean the idea that Dario just lets Castro still wrestle after finding out he is a cop trying to bring him down is just ridiculous. Dario has had far lesser people murdered just for not winning a wrestling match. But they make a body cavity spot more amusing than I would have thought, Joey breaks a riot shield with his head, Castro misses a crossbody and crashes through a riot squad guy, they do a well done missed sledgehammer shot into a cop car, Joey gets hot coffee dumped down his trunks, Castro smartly uses a riot shield to give him stronger shoulderblocks (I mean that really is a smart spot), a bunch of not-overly-clever moments. I actually think this was the best of the non-Muertes props fights in the series history, and I was NOT expecting that on paper.

TL: Cortez Castro being billed as from “The Streets” is laughably bad. Then Striker says his piece on respecting the police and I really want to reach through the TV and slap the taste out of his mouth. As the only one who watched this match with audio working, I can only add that the racial undertones of a Latino/Caucasian matchup surrounded by “police” on the outside was alluded to on commentary, and I’m ready to fast forward. Screw a mute. Vampiro asks Matt what he’d do in this match and I almost expect him to say, “Ask a cop to help.” Oh, wait. THEY HAVE SIRENS ON TOP OF THE RINGPOSTS. I’M LOSING IT. The setting for this match is such a damper on the match itself that it’s hard to really review it. Then Striker says he wishes folks would fight more in person than on Twitter and I’m out on this. Thankfully, we’re coming to the end of this one, and the match starts being louder than Striker on commentary. Lot of simple stuff looking really good. WHY DOES THE RAT COP WIN???? This was sure something else. I don’t know if I enjoyed it as much as Eric did on mute, which means I’m making terrible life choices.

The Rabbit Tribe vs. Matanza

ER: I would really love a London/Matanza singles match given 10-12 minutes. This was more messy than that made up match would have been, but that's to be expected in a 3 on 1 match where 3 of the people are on LSD. Cobb isn't really a bulldozer in the same way Andre was, so I don't think 3 on 1 is a situation that plays to his monster strengths. 1 on 1 throwing a guy around looks much cooler. He's already a shorter guy (though obviously stocky as hell) so 3 on 1 tends to dwarf him. I did really like the Tribe's rabid rapid rabbit dropkicks in the corner, just all running in on top of each other throwing dropkick after dropkick. It looked like a video of a bunch of bunnies just jumping all over each other in a pen. Still, I wish they gave London more of a platform to shine. After his quality big bumping miracle work in the year and a half long Cueto Cup, I think he's someone who could really shine when motivated. Give him goof off leash, and he'll take it and run. Treat him like an actual guy and he may still work big.

TL: Some cute stuff, but nothing overly great. I think it would have been cool to see this like a gauntlet like the Lotus stuff earlier in the season, but this should have had way more Matanza crazy power stuff to it. Instead, it was oddly more of a Rabbit Tribe showcase. If Festus can get off the craziness and go straight edge, Paul London can, too. Okay, maybe I wasn’t done making Phoenix Theater-related references in this review.

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Lucha Underground Season 3 Episode 9: Loser Leaves Lucha

ER: It hasn't been said, but my oh my does Slap Bak seem like a horrible band.

MD: I have no idea about the band. When I watched this, the El Rey promo stuff was cutting off the sound for the first minute or so. I'll take Eric's word on it.

1. Matanza vs. Cortez Castro

ER: This was a little over 2 minutes long but totally great. Castro comes out with his arm in a cast, and Matanza headbutts him at the bell and then starts stomping the broken arm. Castro's anguish was perfect, and then Matanza stands him up and begins twisting and yanking on the broken arm, and in an awesome visual he snaps the cast straight. Castro gets a great hope spot when Matanza slips the broken cast off and threatens to beat him with it, and Castro hits a nice dropkick to the knee. Buuuuuut, Matanza hits one of the coolest flying uppercuts you've seen, and then plants him with the tour of the temple. All of this was really well done.

MD: Dario's joy over the wheel is the best thing. The very best thing. On the other hand, Castro taking the kendo stick to the ring and then not actually using it is pretty ridiculous. I got a kick out of Matanza being fascinated by the cast. In general, I don't think they've presented Castro as strong enough for a central protagonist role relative to his narrative importance, but then I have no idea where the plot's going. His hope spot was great but him actually using that Kendo stick to start would have probably helped.

MD: I get that they probably needed to have Puma speak at some point to flesh out his character since he's the top face and all but less is far more in execution.

2. Dr. Wagner Jr. vs. Son of Havoc

ER: Fun match, although I was really surprised at how it ended. We all knew Havoc was winning, because we all knew Sagrada was going to get his chance for revenge against Famous B (which, again, seems weird as B did legitimately get him several singles match opportunities. It's not really B's fault that he lost those matches. We may have to just be honest with ourselves that the man weighs 60 lb. and may not be super competitive against most athletes), but I didn't think Havoc would be pinning Wagner clean. Havoc has now been established over many matches as a surprisingly over fan favorite who loses most of his big singles matches. He exists around the top third of the LU card and is viewed as a tough win for main eventers, but an almost certain win. Wagner has so far been presented as an almost untouchable legend, so it was almost shocking to see them work just a straight match without an ounce of a disputed finish. And it wasn't even treated as a big deal! You'd think there would be more drama wrapped up in whether or not Sagrada would get his shot at revenge, but instead they worked an exciting fast paced Velocity match that was satisfying in a bubble but didn't feel like the right match to work with the stip attached. Still, in a bubble the match was fun. Wagner broke out a couple weird throws and it was impressive seeing him work such a fast style.

MD: Speaking of guys that they haven't presented as strong enough, I'm still griping about Havoc's momentum from the end of last season being squashed. When the lovable loser starts to win matches and gets over for it, capitalize on that. Now he gets a truly big win over Wagner and it's just backdrop to Sagrada vs Famous B. Total backwards priorities. That said, the idea of a Believer's Backlash match is perfect for the feud. I was wondering what sort of gimmick would actually be to Sagrada's advantage, and there you go. This was a fun little TV sprint, though, and Wagner gave a ton more than I would generally expect in this situation. Shame that it probably won't mean much in the end.

3. Loser Leaves Lucha: Chavo Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio

ER: Killer match and a fulfilling end to their literally 20 years long feud. I remember seeing these two fight every couple months on Worldwide and WCWSN in 96/97 and now I feel old. But this was an excellently structured match with some fun twists, a real crowd pleaser. Chavo gets a lot of unnecessary hate from wrestling fans, but I still really enjoy what he brings. This is a match you've seen likely dozens of times but I appreciated them breaking out a couple new tricks. Rey works over the knee early and Chavo is good about wobbling around on it, and you just knew he was going to take the first opportunity to attack Rey's knees as payback. The reversals are cool and play off how well they know each other, and Chavo Classic coming in with the DQ was a perfect Guerrero lie/cheat/steal finish. We all knew Rey wasn't going to be the one retiring so naturally Dario comes out with the crowd hyping restart. I loved Classic running straight at Rey after the restart since it was now No DQ (really thought he should have kept interfering the rest of the match, but oh well) and he took a mean spill through his chair/bottom rope. Chavo gets one last great hope spot when he rolls through Rey's Thesz press into a single leg (and because Striker is an abhorrent know it all shithead he just has to call it the White Out. Look at me! I remember 3 months of a gimmick from over a decade ago!!), but it's not enough. Man I flipped out for that single leg. The result was never in doubt, but these two went out and killed it regardless.

MD: The name Loser Leaves Lucha is, on one hand, absurd, but on the other, kind of great. Alliteration is one of the greatest tools in all of wrestling. Anyway, can you believe people complained about Chavo in LU? He was great here. Rey is always great and it's a joy we still get to see him wrestle. Eric's right in that the ending was never really in doubt but the journey was a blast.
Chavo's early pin attempts got over the sanctity of the stip. His rocket launcher power bomb facebuster thing was aces. The leg work was interesting and varied enough to get me past Striker going on about how the Guerreros were known for their legwork. And yes, if this has to be the last we'll ever see of Chavo Classic, it was a great way to go out. The ending was predictable but I got a kick out of the absolute grace Rey showed in getting Chavo into 619 position.

Also Dario calling for the match to get restarted was downright gif-worthy (sorry, Eric):


Classic Dario Face


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Lucha Underground Season 3 Episode 4: Brothers in Broken Arms

MD: I am ahead of Eric now, which is frustrating because I can't just crib off of his notes. That's not to say that Lucha Underground is work, but you definitely have to be in the right mindset. This started with Sexy Star and Dario talking. I love that they call atomicos matches atomicos matches. Why doesn't CMLL ever run them? Why didn't they run Ultimo Guerrero, Gran Guerrero, Euforia, and Niebla Roja vs Rush, Sombra, Mascara, and Marco (or Naito) when they could have? I'm really not looking forward to Mundo vs Star one-on-one when that happens, but at least they're building to it.

ER: FYI you guys, Sexy Star was really bad in that opening segment. Just thought you'd be interested in knowing that. Her line reading always sounds like she's phonetically screaming English, as if she's not actually saying real words, just jaggedly combining sounds together to form objects similar to words. Her kick to the locker door didn't even convince the locker that it had been kicked.

1. Sinestro de la Muerte vs. Prince Puma

MD: Way, way, way too competitive. Apparently Dr. Wagner, Jr. is the only one who can properly squash anyone anymore. This match was supposed to be Puma looking strong against Muertes' crony, to the point that Catrina was going to kill him. I'm not saying it should have been a total squash and it did get across the idea that Puma was more intense now, but Sinestro took way too much of this. Striker's commentary was too staged too, as if he was expecting Mil to run in and was just waiting for the cue. Puma doing the flatliner was cute and I hope it leads to Mil doing the 630.

ER: Decent enough WorldWide squash to pace us until Puma's match with Muertes, until it suddenly didn't turn into a squash and Sinestro got a lot of offense. I thought the opening punch exchange was awful, looked like two guys having a hoedown. Once we got into move trading I dug it, both guys worked fast sequences well and Sinestro was adept at taking Puma's offense. I liked this missed interference spot by Muertes, leading to Puma finishing off Sinestro while glaring Muertes down. The wild dive after the match was great.

MD: Dario's "I'm kind of a big deal" nameplate is awesome. I wonder what the story behind it is. I bet that it's Mascarita Sagrada's secret santa present for him. Passive aggressive Castro is better than scared Mr. Cisco acting. Dario using Pentagon Dark like Teddy Long would use the Undertaker was good too.

2. Cortez Castro vs. Pentagon Dark

MD: So Puma can't get a squash against the guy that they're killing off (literally), but Castro gets completely squashed by Pentagon despite needing to be a quasi-protagonist in all of this police drama stuff. Beats me, though I'll admit Pentagon needed to look strong. I would have flipped the layout of those first two matches.

ER: See, they CAN do squash matches correctly! Here's the obligatory Phil throwback spot where he points out them running the same angle and same match on the same show. I have no idea how I'm supposed to feel about Castro at this point. Am I supposed to be rooting for him? They're not giving me a whole lot to root for. Also noticed JR Kratos just sitting in the crowd, not really reacting to Pentagon's promo. But I loved one guy's reaction to Pentagon saying that in the ring, he doesn't even respect his own mother. Some guy just had total disbelief on his face.

3. Aerostar, Fenix, Drago & Sexy Star vs. Johnny Mundo, Jack Evans, PJ Black & Taya

MD: The best multi-man lucha tags all have a central storyline running through them. Here, it should be to set up Sexy Star and Mundo? That's not promising and frankly, it barely matters because they don't focus on it anyway. They started with Taya and Star instead, with Taya having her share of chants. That's not too surprising given how thoroughly into her character she is. All of the beginning of this was goofy. At one point PJ Black was fighting against superior tecnico odds which is generally not something your heel should be doing? Then they had some heat on Sexy Star, her getting the hot tag to show up Mundo, a fun comeback with Aerostar looking awesome on dives (again), and Mundo making sure Sexy Star lost in the end, continuing their program. I'm not sure where Eric is going to fall on this, but it felt like a mess to me. The destination forwarded the program but the journey was all over the place.

ER: I thought this was fine. The guys I expected to look good looked good, and the people I expected to stink, stunk. Sexy Star looked terrible throughout. This was not unexpected. I was hoping her interactions would be limited to one or two opponents, because she has a knack of making everybody else look stupid by waiting around for her. So, we had a lot of guys waiting for her to get in the right position, or wait far too long in one place for her to finally do a move. The match needed more Fenix, my personal favorite in the group. And when he was in I thought he looked awesome. Evans made me laugh with his neverending string of handsprings leading to a tag out. Even Striker made me laugh right after when he said "Some of Jack's best ring work". Mundo and Black rotated between throwing out something real good, and something overly rehearsed. At one point Black threw a kick about 2 feet to the right of Drago, clearly because it was just meant to be swept aside. I hate when those kind of cracks show. Drago had some nice glue moments, coming in low and fast on dropdowns and keeping a real snug and fast headscissors on Black. Aerostar always seems like he makes up flying moves as he goes and I love him for that. Sometimes they look a little dodgy, but it's worth it for the spectacular moments. So yeah, this was kind of a mess, but the mess all came from expected sources.

MD: I'll let Eric talk about soul stealing and broken necks (or let him not talk about it).

ER: I mean, this match was one of Sinestro's more dominant performances, so it's weird for them to so casually be done with him now. There have probably been 10 lousy Sinestro performances that lead to him not getting his neck broken, so it's weird they just now realized the last of their lightning babies was a dud. I'm unsure how much strength you can gain by stealing the soul of losers, but at least they had the decency to break his neck so he doesn't have to go through life not having convenience store doors open for him. It's possible Muertes will just trade it for some pogs anyway.

4. Dragon Azteca Jr. vs. Chavo Guerrero

MD: Azteca gets credit for selling the arms early on. People sure recover from Pentagons' broken arm treatment quickly so it was nice to see some lingering aftereffects. I'm always irrationally glad that Rey has his "Jr." back. Look, this was all fine and everyone played their respective roles well, but when the most memorable part of a match is Vampiro, on commentary, babbling on about haunted houses and Aztec warriors, then maybe there's something lacking in the match.

ER: I liked this more than Matt, mainly because I thought Chavo looked great. He's probably the most undeserving guy who gets dumped on by fans of the show, and I think he's mostly delivered throughout his LU run. This match may have failed if the goal was to make Azteca look like he actually deserves and has a shot against Pentagon, but at least it continued to confirm how good Chavo can be. All his mat stuff looked good, his clothesline out of the corner was great, really he was awesome at steamrolling Azteca. Again, not sure it's in their best interest to have Azteca steamrolled, but I didn't mind.

(neither of us mention Black Lotus and her ninjas)


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Lucha Underground Season 2 Episode 22: Fame & Fortune

ER: Having Voodoo Glow Skulls on every week really brings me back to high school. I had no clue those guys were still going. I wonder what the Pietasters are up to.

1. Daga vs. Mascarita Sagrada

ER: Striker keeps pointing out that Sagrada hasn't won a match since signing up with Famous B, but he's failing to mention that Sagrada is also getting far more opportunities than he did before. Yeah he was on the winning side of a couple six mans last season, but now he's getting into actual contender matches. I'm not sure how him losing those matches is any fault of Famous B. We might just have to come to terms with the fact that Sagrada is 65 pounds, and that *may* be holding him back. It's cute that Daga leaps way into ranas for him, but really either Striker is missing the point of this storyline, or more likely they have no actual idea what the eventual outcome of this storyline is going to be. And they probably should have picked a different fan to cut to than the girl who was laughing while Famous B was kicking the shit out of Sagrada. I know lucha cameramen are taught to look for cute girls in the crowd, but maybe there was a better time to show her?

2. Cortez Castro, Mr. Cisco & Joey Ryan vs. Killshot, Sinestro de la Muerte & Marty "The Moth" Martinez

ER:  Pretty hard for the LU crowd to muster a lot of energy for this one. Even Vampiro noted how quiet they were at one point. It wasn't a bad match, but it wasn't very good. I liked Moth and Cisco in this, but they were canceled out by Sinestro fucking up every single person's timing (man is he bad) and a few brief but epically goofy Killshot spots that required every person in the match to kill time standing in position so he could do some convoluted flip fuckery. "Killshot with the tactical advantage," says Striker. It's easy to get a "tactical advantage" when Castro wanders onto the apron near no other wrestler, and all the other wrestlers start to cluster in a specific spot, just so Killshot can then vault off of Castro onto everybody, but mostly his partners. It could not have come off less organic. Striker always talks about what an inspiration Sexy Star is, so it's weird to also talk about how much he likes The Moth. "I know Hank raped Debbie, and don't get me wrong I love Debbie....but Hank is kind of cool too! He invited me to a fun BBQ, let's me use his Hulu password and....I don't know I just like the guy!" I get it, Striker likes every worker on the roster and they all get him HYPED, but maybe the fed shouldn't have run a kidnapping/sexual assault angle so every person involved doesn't look like dumb assholes afterwards. Anyway, Cisco had a bunch of cool armdrags, Castro surprised me by bringing some nice strikes, and Moth really knows how to take stupid offense nicely. But this draaaaaggggged. At one point I thought we were well around the 15 minute mark, but we were barely 7 in. After the match Moth steals Killshot's stupid fucking dogtags again, and runs away, but Killshot is faster than Moth so has to do a Barney Fife run to pretend like he can't catch him. Ugh.

3. Sexy Star & Mariposa vs. Taya & Ivelisse

ER: This match wasn't very long, just 10 minutes, but boy did it feel long. It's like they went from editing things super tight to make all the matches seem as exciting as possible, to not editing them in any way and not piping in any sort of crowd noise. These last two weeks have had more stretches of silent crowd than any other episodes combined. These all just feel like quiet, slowly worked Smackdown matches. It's kind of a jarring change of pace. Taya is good at working opposite Sexy Star, though Mariposa and Star are horrible forced tag partners considering their past. I don't need them to be at each other's throats but they didn't even seem like they had a problem with each other. This whole thing was pretty dryly mechanical until it spilled to the floor and we get a couple of awesome bumps into chairs and a big Ivelisse dive. But even then the psychology was out the window as the winning pin would advance the winner to Ultima Lucha, but nobody felt like they were trying to scramble to get the pin. It felt like the wrestlers didn't know the rules and they just added them in after the tapings.

ER: Striker is now calling Prince Puma "The face of the franchise" which is weird since a few weeks ago he screamed "A new star is born!!!" after Puma got the pinfall in a six man. Both comments are weird, as Puma was clearly already a star, well before the 54th episode of the show. But saying he's now the face of the franchise doesn't sound right either, as up until this interview challenging Mysterio he hasn't felt like much of a focal point this season. Mysterio comes out and accepts the match, and I cannot deny that I'm excited for those two matching up in a singles. Curious if they'll work it tecnico/tecnico or if Puma will work subtle rudo. Actually, I'd flip out if Rey worked subtle heel, like a couple moments of Puma working faster than him leading to Rey landing an untoward kick or something. But I'm getting ahead of myself. I assume it will be tecnico/tecnico.


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Lucha Underground Season 2 Episode 16: Graver Consequences

ER: "Running an underground fight club? It's exhausting." "Have you ever run a city?" I didn't realize Lamas would be back and damn am I glad he got to be in a low talking contest with Dario. I got silly excited for all the hints of the mayor.

1. Mr. Cisco vs. Cortez Castro vs. Joey Ryan

ER: I was surprised that this match is for the final medallion. I hadn't realized they were through all the medallion matches already. They should have had a couple onscreen graphics or something. And as I type that the match just ends with a Joey Ryan roll up. Well that's lame. I hope Dario finds out about he and Castro and feeds their faces to Matanza.

PAS: Yeah the undercover cop stuff is so stupid, and has some of the lamer workers in the fed. Mr. Cisco deserves better.

2. Ivelisse, Son of Havoc  & Johnny Mundo vs. Prince Puma, Dragon Azteca Jr., & Rey Mysterio

ER: Was hoping for more out of this one, but it wasn't bad. I oddly wanted to see Rey matched up with Ivelisse, but he was kinda stuck with Havoc the whole match. A lot of Havoc's offense looked pretty light and bad, but he was really good about getting into position for the 619 in some different ways. There was also a cool moment where Rey hops onto Havoc's shoulders on a knucklelock and Havoc tries to shake him off by dropping to his knees. Azteca looked really good and he does some cool little "extra" strikes that I like. It's not enough for someone to run into his boot in the corner, they run into the right boot and he quickly kicks them with the left. Azteca moves real quick and his quickness stands out in a match with Rey Mysterio, so that's pretty impressive. When Puma gets the pinfall Striker weirdly says "A new star is born!!" in one of those lousy "WrestleMania moment!" soundbites, as if Puma wasn't a top 2 guy in the fed the entire first season. Man Striker is annoying.

PAS: This was fine, but for spotty juniors carried by Rey, Havoc is no Super Calo. I do like the Superfriend trios team. I miss Angelico and that is something I can't believe I am saying.

3. Graver Consequences: Mil Muertes vs. Matanza

ER: These guys know how to to a big match, and they brought out plenty bells and whistles for this one. This was arguably one of Muertes' best performances. He was the guy taking it right to Matanza. His right hands were blistering, he hit a big dive, an awesome spear into a bunch of chairs, took tons of big bumps onto numerous caskets (one over the top onto one, getting powerbombed onto one, and more), and just moving things along. Dario was a real champ in this too. Him grabbing Muertes' foot, getting yanked onto the apron and then taking a wild bump onto the apron and floor (that the camera almost missed, get your act together Rodriguez). I was not expecting that. He also takes a tumble from a Catrina slap. I really loved all the bumps into caskets, and jeez were the guys doing some back breaking labor throughout all of this, dragging those caskets around and throwing them into and out of the ring. Matanza also threw some of the best punches I've seen from him, his headbutts were great, of course all of his throws, and I loved the powerslam into the casket. A bunch of great stuff here. Now I just want even more!

PAS: This was a match of insane moments, I don't think it was as great a holistic match as the other big time Muertes match, but man were those moments awesome. Matanza choking Catrina and getting speared into chairs was incredible as was all of the awkward janky bumps on the caskets and the fist through the casket lid was one of the coolest wrestling visuals I can ever remember seeing. They left some violence on the table for next time, and I am excited to see it ramped up another level.

ER: Oh man I loved that scene with Lamas in the back of a limo. Who the hell can the mayor be!?  I loved all of Lamas' stammering and the shot of him in line with the lit cigar. Please don't let the mayor be Russo.


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Lucha Underground Season 2 Episode 14: Cage in a Cage

1. Cage Match: Cage vs. Johnny Mundo

ER: This had some nice moments, but overall didn't do much for me. The best parts were easily Mundo getting chucked wildly into the cage, peaking with him being powerbombed into the cage and sliding all the way down, like Sylvester leaping into a wall and missing Tweety. But a lot of this wasn't very good. For a longer match it didn't really build anywhere. We get silly cage match stuff like Mundo whiffing on a corkscrew moonsault off the top of the cage, even though up to that point of the match he had been trying to escape over the top of the cage. I mean Mundo wants nothing more than an Aztec medallion...but I guess just couldn't pass up the opportunity to do some flips! We also get Taya interfering with maybe the worst Singapore cane shots I've ever seen. I know she had to hold onto the top of the cage, but damn those shots were embarrassing. The selling was all over the map as no matter how much offense Mundo took, he was always the one doing something preposterous off the top. Cage's square driver finish looked nasty, at least.

PAS: Yeah this felt a little like a Smackdown cage match to end a feud which already had a PPV blow off. Mundo does some crazy stuff, but it never really distinguished itself. Taya does take a big beating although her taking a beating as a heel on the same show that Ivelisse takes the big beating as a face, is the kind of repeat itself booking that bugs me about LU. Finish was feud ending for sure.


2. Elimination Match: Fenix, Jack Evans & PJ Black vs. Mr. Cisco, Cortez Castro & Joey Ryan vs. Rey Mysterio, Prince Puma & Dragon Azteca Jr. vs. Ivelisse & Son of Havoc

ER: This was really fun, often kind of a mess, could have been better, but was a totally enjoyable mess. Elimination style could have been good, but annoying that one pinfall meant the whole team was gone. And they shouldn't have made it 4 people in the ring at once. Just make it one on one with tons of dudes on the apron. Having 4 people in there at once means we almost immediately go to two guys lying around sucking wind after taking one move. The twisting springboard flip dive train was pretty great, although I feel bad for Dragon Azteca for somehow doing a twisting moonsault into 6 people and missing all of them. The cameras caught Rey's dive off the top perfectly, shooting it from behind so it looked like he flew 20 feet. Ivelisse hit a really great sunset flip powerbomb, Fenix had another stellar performance (man he makes that Azteca DDT look deadly), and this finally got really good once they got it down to two teams. Evans was en fuego throughout this whole thing, and it now officially the baddest bitch in the fed. Him vs. Rey is a bonkers dream match. Really wish we could have just gotten two separate trios matches instead of this jumbled, sorta rushed match, but there were too many bright spots throughout to get too down on it. I'm just grumpy we got robbed of two additional trios matches by them lumping the semifinals and the finals all into one match.

PAS: I dug this although it was very all over the place. Really dug the dive train, and the part of the match where everyone was taking nutty bumps to the floor. Thought the first two eliminations were kind of perfunctory, and we would have been better off with neither team in the match. Loved the final showdown fall, and Rey looks completely reborn in this fed.

ER: Loved the Pentagon/Vampiro final segment, with Vampiro burning him with evil candle wax (the melted wax looked killer on his mask) and Pentagon cruising out in some weird futuristic wheelchair while Vamp went back to his fat bloated zombie from the beginning of Zombie look. I like that depending on which way you view the segment you can see on man's exhausting rehabilitation, or also a man being harnessed for ultimate evil.

PAS: The hot wax reminded me a little too much of Body of Evidence the Madonna/Willem Dafoe BDSM erotic thriller.


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Lucha Underground Season 2 Episode 11: Bird of War

ER: So is the buddy cop Reyes/Ryan stuff supposed to be funny? There's some midi-sax music playing and they're cracking jokes about Matanza - a guy who Reyes witnessed eat a man's face - being released from the cage. I don't get it.

PAS: The cop stuff is some of the dumbest stuff they are doing in this fed (and they are doing some dumb stuff), it doesn't even make any internal sense and the acting in it is Spice channel bad. Joey Ryan is a pox on our house

1. Ivelisse vs. Kobra Moon

ER: I actually really liked this one. I guess it shouldn't be shocking as Ivelisse has been great so far, but Moon had a flat debut against Sexy Star and - even though any work against Sexy Star should immediately be discounted - it sucked some interest out of this one for me. And then they both went out and had a snug, nicely laid out match. Any pensiveness Moon showed against Star was gone here, as both ladies laid into each other with chops and knees. A lot of the rollups were held really tightly and there were moments were this felt like a mean fight, which I wasn't expecting. Ivelisse sold Moon's rope chokes well, and I kinda liked the hissing as a taunt to your opponent.

PAS: Yeah, Eric is riding alone on this one. I thought some of submission stuff was cool, and Ivelisse always works stiff, but Kobra Moon still looked in deep waters. Felt like a pretty decent WWE women's match from four years ago, and pretty good Alicia Fox v. Brie Bella level stuff doesn't excite me.


ER: Killshot video managed to be good and bad at the same time. Somehow they managed to incorporate his bad indy offense into him killing ISIS, and for that I love them. But who the hell was he shooting at? He fired upwards of 35 shots at ludicrous trick shot angles, practically doing an Annie Oakley Old West Shooting Show, but he would fire 5 shots in one direction, and then a terrorist from the same direction would burst onto the screen. For a guy who misses half his spots it would make sense for him to also have terrible aim. But having Killshot take down terrorists is a step up from showing somebody fighting three unnamed luchadors in a nighttime alley.

PAS: This was OK I guess, the gunshot special effect were really corny though and Killshot is a suck ass dude to get this sort of effort for.

2. Cortez Castro, Mr. Cisco & Joey Ryan vs. Marty the Moth Martinez, Mariposa & The Mack

ER: Fun trios match, if you ignore that Mack was mostly fine teaming with his "mortal enemies" who kidnapped and potentially sexually abused his best lil buddy. Mack was somewhat miffed when he didn't get the hot tag, but apparently didn't think to refuse to tag with the people who assaulted and held his friend captive. Does he just really want the trios belts that badly? Does he respect the spirit of competition so much that he will literally set aside ANY difference? Oh, that's right, we had a cooperative chop exchange between he and Marty. That should make his raped friend feel a little better.  So all of that shit is the stupidest shit possible, but right in the middle of it we got a great little Cisco/Mack roll around, a fun Cisco/Mariposa segment, Ryan dropkicking Moth right in the chin, and I like the way Moth and Mariposa work together. This was also the most work Cisco has gotten in a match and he looked killer. Post match Star at least shows some fire going after Mariposa, while Mack cheers her on. But why the fuck didn't Mack just do this himself if he wanted it for her so bad? Instead he just held the tag rope wanting the hot tag like a doof the whole match.

PAS:  Cisco is badass, and I loved his section with the Mack, but I totally agree with Eric that the Mack/Star v. Martinez siblings stuff in-ring is totally divorced from the back stage vignettes. In ring we have a testy little feud with some tag partners who don't get along. In the back Sexy Star is recovering from being stuck in a pit by Jame Gumb. It feels like they decided to film all the sexual assault stuff after the fact and retconned it in. It is pretty amazing that a show which can do so many thing so right, can do other stuff so blindingly wrong.

ER: Okay, Mysterio, Horus and Puma is a killer trios team. I am 100% on board for that.

3. Fenix vs. Matanza

ER: This was awesome. This is a monster I can get behind. Fenix just kept coming at Matanza and damn does Cobb just have some ridiculous strength. The way he caught Fenix on the tope was just unreal. He caught him with his side facing the ring! This was not a guy getting caught on a plancha, this was a man pulling a speeding bullet out of the air. all of his catches where he then adjusts mid catch, or AFTER the catch, before a slam are just incredible. That extra step to show you that Matanza has you now, and he can bend twist turn whatever while holding your corpse. He caught Fenix in mid air a few times, always pausing, turning his body in a new direction to show he was the one completely in control, and then just crushing him through the mat. This whole thing was just killer. And then full on tecnico Mil Muertes bursts into frame and I immediately get excited for a Clash of Famous Monsters. Killer stuff here.

PAS: Yeah this was the best Matanza has looked. Fenix got some offense in, but still got eaten alive. I also loved how Matanza was smashing his head against the floor like he was trying to open up a coconut, really violent looking and very different then you would normally see in a wrestling match. Muertes v. Matanza should be totally awesome. I love Clash of Titans matches and this has some of the coolest build up a match like that has ever had.

ER: Overall a good episode with the wrestling all delivering, which is all I can really ask for.


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Lucha Underground Season 2 Episode 10: El Jefe is Back

ER: Weird that Striker didn't point out that Chingon is Robert Rodriguez's band. You'd think he'd have all sorts of face slap worthy facts to spout. But I really liked Dario back in the temple, and liked him telling Pentagon that maybe he wasn't "champion material". Pentagon's reaction was understandable, but check out Cueto's awesome instincts when he clutches his arm in tight to his waist to try and prevent Pentagon from breaking it. How many times have you see wrestlers lock on something like a surfboard, and the wrestler taking the move willingly goes along with the sequence and just holds his arms up for his opponent? And here's a non wrestler who gets it.

1. Taya & Johnny Mundo vs. Mr. Cisco & Cortez Castro

ER: This seemed like a match long internal battle wherein Mundo tried to throw the worst clothesline possible. Castro had a nice kick on Taya to start, and then he had some meh kicks the rest of the match. Cisco had some nice moments with Mundo, really dug his big punch. Taya isn't that good when she's not taking big spills, her timing is all wonky and her moveset is loose. If we're going on the sliding Sexy Star scale then she's excellent. But in these matches she's not much. And why the hell were they already hinting at a "feuding tag partners" thing with Taya/Mundo. We don't even know who she is or why they're teaming, just that they've been affiliated since her debut. And now in their first actual tag together he's tagging himself in and stealing pinfalls. It seems like they not only skipped a few steps, but skipped steps to get to an angle nobody would want to see.

PAS: I like Taya's look and I think she fits well with Mundo as a pair of sleazy heel crossfit trainers, but she is really tentative and off looking in the ring. She takes huge bumps, she should probably just be a Sherri Martel like valet, not everyone has to be a wrestler. Mr. Cisco is my favorite under the radar guy in this fed, just so fun to watch.

ER: Man, Marty the Moth has a wildly punchable shitty face. He's like the Mark Teixera of LU. And look at that, we see Mariposa in action beating up unknown luchadors in suits. Hey good idea, guys!! Showing debuting workers beating up random luchadors is LU's "We know who that is!!!"

ER: I still don't know how they haven't gotten any bourbon or scotch companies to sign up as LU sponsors. Cueto would be so great at wedging the brand name into the sketches. "Oh Catrina, I didn't see you there. I was lost in my...Woodford Reserve" (Dario looks at camera before Catrina quickly turns his head toward her).

2. Elimination Match: Ivelisse, Angelico & Son of Havoc vs. Disciples of Death

ER: Oh god these scrubs are still around? Were there only two trios teams at this set of tapings? The gold one takes a cool fast bump through the ropes to the floor. Is that Argenis? He jumped into Angelico's flying knee nicely as well. The purple one was decidedly worse than the gold one. I think he fell over before even being hit by an Angelico flip dive. Angelico had a bunch of cool stuff throughout, dug his run up the apron, jump to inside middle rope knee. His knees usually look cool, though, so this isn't news. Son of Havoc's body presses land pillowy soft but damn him hopping on two DOD members off the top rope was neat. And then his two topes were the first time the match really felt any sort of real excitement or energy. What is the point of DOD again? Also, I assumed at the beginning of the season that they were building to a "Catrina loses her wig" spot, but now I'm pretty sure that she's too serious for that to happen. But it's getting really distracting seeing her holding onto her hair every time she has to take a bump.

PAS: Yeah there were occasional moments from the DoD but man what a nothing group they are. They need to cut bait on these guys, I like the idea of Muertes and Catrina having lackeys, but they need cool costumes and way better wrestlers under them, and they need to be built strong, not like goofball jobber scrubs. I liked Angelico in this too, can't believe he has turned into a wrestler I don't mind watching, his early IWRG days were a tire fire.

3. Sexy Star vs. Mariposa

ER: What the fuck was the point of this? So Moth and Mariposa held Sexy Star captive for some time, then we don't really hear about any of it, and then they just fight with no real build up, both women look bad, and then the match ends. It was mercifully short, but this feud and the Mariposa character are DOA. This violent kidnapper with her savage creep brother just kind of throws some goofy ass stomach punches and whiffs on a sloppy moonsault, while Sexy Star just does a bunch of bad rope running. This was all embarrassing.

PAS: I kind of like Marty the Moth, he is a total sleaze, but Sexy Star is a black hole of interest. Also I feel a little weird about them pushing her as this feminist hero the whole first season, only to have her kidnapped and presumably sexually abused in between seasons. Whole thing just rubs me the wrong way.

4. Pentagon Jr. vs. Matanza

ER:  Boy Matanza (btw "Matanza Cueto" sounds realllllly stupid. Let's just keep the monster on a first name basis, shall we?) is going to be a real tough character to book going forward. Will fans respond to a character in 2016 who sells no offense from anybody? Will he just operate at an untouchable level above every other worker? They have to create a weakness for him at some point, but what will it be without being something silly like Undertaker's urn? Are we going to have somebody melt down Dario's key to harness Matanza's powers? Cobb is a beast and his deadlift throws are awesome, we get our NOAH rail ride/LU guy tossed through chairs spot that I love, but I could see the Matanza character getting real difficult real fast.

PAS: It might be the end of great main event matches, but I thought that was a pretty impressive one sided beat down. Pentagon Jr. will be back I assume and this sure as heck gives him a incentive to come back strong. I liked Pentagon Jr. using the X arm signal, often that Russo break kayfabe stuff irritates me, but here it looked like a guy who was afraid for his life.

ER: Pretty flat episode after some very good ones. Maybe we need that breather episode so we don't get too spoiled. Or something. Dario's segments were a welcome return on this show, and that's really the only thing that kept this episode from being completely terrible. The Sexy Star feud would be a dud even if it was not Sexy Star in the feud, and the Disciples of Death still appearing on TV in any capacity - let alone still competing in matches where Striker talks about how evil they are - is a head scratcher. Famous B wouldn't even give these assholes his card. If anything though the episode set up a couple of future stories that could pay off down the road, with a new trios tournament and Vampiro potentially bringing back Monster Pentagon. But we shall see.


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Lucha Underground Season 2 Episode 5: The Machine

1. Jack Evans vs. PJ Black

ER: I liked this, while also disliking it. I didn't think Black looked very good, but while Black was looking kinda meh, I was loving Evans doing his best to make Black look murderous. Evans bumping for a limp spin kick and taking a roaring elbow like a gunshot and getting launched on a slow lift German looked really good, and I loved him doing dickish things like clotheslining Black's legs while he was on the top rope. But then when Evans would go on offense his stuff would miss just as bad as Black's, maybe even worse. Poor Black had to literally run halfway across the ring to catch a springboard kick to the face. Evans would have fallen about 4 feet short. I like Evans' in his new Dragonslayer shit talker persona, but this match fell pretty flat.

PAS: This was kind of a mess, Evans is at his best getting beat up and selling for bruisers, or in a tag team working as Ricky Morton or a hot tag. These 50/50 matches with high flyers he has been booked in LU really don't showcase his strengths. PJ Black brings nothing to the table,  just a weird waste of money and an example of this feds weird WWE washout hard on.

ER: "I'll turn you from a jobber to a robber". Dug the Famous B late night infomercial, and especially loved that it wasn't him beating up luchadors in a dusty bar. I guess he served his time doing short match job duty in season 1, but now his arm must be all healed from Pentagon and now he's selling life advice and get rich quick schemes in the hood.

2. King Cuerno vs. Killshot

ER: Barf. Wasn't looking forward to seeing Cuerno working 50/50 with Killshot of all people. The sound sweetening was absurd in this match, but kind of hilariously inconsistent. You'd get two superkicks in a row that sounded like brutal bullwhip sound fx, but then they would just let a sloppy Killshot jumping knee go silent. I mean if you're going to make 5 bad Killshot strikes sound like a sledgehammer hitting metal siding, you may as well make all of them sound like that. Killshot had some flat out embarrassing moments in this, among them an astoundingly stupid breakdancing legsweep kick that...well honestly I have no fucking clue what it was supposed to be. The best was him hitting some sort of ace crusher off the apron but he...slipped? or something so ended up kinda slapping Cuerno's tummy and dragging him down by the arm and left Cuerno with no clue how to bump it. Killshot's specialty is doing moves that look like he takes more damage than his opponent, but this one took the cake. This is a taped fucking show, and THIS made the cut!? What kind of Killshot offense was edited out?? Cuerno was made to look like a boob doing even stevens elbow exchanges with this goof. Killshot has no clue how to get in position for anything in the ring. At one hilarious point he is on the mat and needs to get to the corner for the next spot, so starts rolling there, but rolls the wrong way at first so has to loop back around to get to the right corner. He's just rolling around the ring, like ghost Kobashi is giving him invisible Kobashi rolls. It's incredible. Is Killshot fucking with us? Five episodes into this season and we've already had two featured Killshot matches where he took over half the match. Fuuuuuuuuuuuuu...

PAS: Yeah this was stinko, if Cuerno can't drag you to something good, they need to feed him to Matanza.

3. Texano vs. Mr. Cisco, Cortez Castro & Chavo Guerrero

ER: I hate handicap gauntlet matches. They always go short and always end with the people who seemingly have the advantage being made to look completely incompetent. Cisco loses immediately to a superkick (not even a cannon firing sound effect superkick like in the last match, you know, when superkicks were just used to set up other moves), poor cop Castro fares a little better, and Chavo barely eeks out the win after Castro holds Texano's legs down. You know, Texano, the guy who worked even with superstar Daivari last season. The guy now running through the team who one week ago were competitive with the top tecnico trios team in the fed. This was a mess of stupidity, almost designed to be as ineffective as possible, while also presenting the least interesting match possible. Money!

ER: Man Dario blows everybody else on this show out of the water. Him being scaled way back has really caused the show to suffer this season. Even if the wrestling was bad in some season 1 episodes,  you could always count on a couple vignettes in Dario's office with him cockily swirling scotch or making great facial reactions to tecnicos he was screwing over. Now he barely pops up every other episode.

PAS: I loved the speech, I just wish it wasn't in service to some mystical Golden Child horseshit. Still the show has been hurt by his absence.

4. Johnny Mundo vs. Cage

ER: "Love him or hate him, he's in shape." Okay, Vampiro. And you still think he weighs 320, right? That would put Mundo around 275? This match was okay I guess, but this season even more than last feels like there's just zero regard to selling in matches. There was just no rhyme or reason to what was keeping each man down in this match, or what would allow them to pop up to hit a move of their own. One twisting slam from a fireman's carry would put Mundo down, another would allow him to hop up and hit a spinny flippy kick. Still not sure why they sweeten the sound on some strikes but need some others just flapping in the wind. I liked Mundo kicking Cage's legs out from him while climbing the turnbuckles, liked Mundo's rope jump tornillo, and this flew by quick enough, and Striker's references were really obnoxious and ehhhhhhh some wind is being taken out of the sails here. And I was really hoping Mundo would get a rave trash valet for no reason, so my wish was granted! Hurrah!

ER: Ladder match next week should be good, at least? Right?

PAS: Let's hope so this is a bunch of poop shows in a row.

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Lucha Underground Season 2 Episode 4: Cero Miedo

ER: They're doing a pretty decent job at building to the eventual Ivelisse/Catrina throwdown. I'm not sure if they're going to play it for comedy by having Catrina lose her wig, or play it like some sort of noir Bound scenario. Probably the latter.

1. Angelico, Ivelisse & Son of Havoc vs. Chavo Guererro, Mr. Cisco & Cortez Castro

ER: Ehhhh this wasn't much. It wasn't bad, but some of these guys have a decent ceiling w/ a low floor, so you can expect some lows occasionally. I forgot how much I missed Cisco on TV, the guy is a real MVP in these type of matches. He feeds Angelico really nicely (really jammed right into that running knee) and even with some miscommunication on an armdrag he makes it look more like a violent move than a mistake. I liked Chavo and Ivelisse going after the others' legs to play up their Season 1 injuries, and this doesn't have much to do with anything but Ivelisse had awesome pants on. Havoc had a rough night, throwing some embarrassing standing clotheslines (I think that's what those were) and some stuff with pillowy soft landings.  The dive train was a real mess with Angelico coming far closer to plowing into the dad in cargo shorts than he was to hitting Castro, Havoc's moonsault barely grazed, and this kinda just limped to the finish.

PAS: Yeah this was OK, but these teams had way better matches last season with Bael in there instead of Chavo, and Chavo is a lot better then Bael. Yeah this was the worst Son of Havoc has looked, I am shocked how much I have enjoyed Matt Cross in this fed, but this was the Matt Cross I have been indifferent to for the last decade.

ER: Boy that Joey Ryan/Castro "act off" was just about the least convincing thing possible. These guys showing off their acting chops is brutal. "I've always been a better cop than you...because I get the job DONE." Yeeeeeesh. Picture that line in a Treat Williams CBS docudrama. It's possible James Caan could make that line cool, but even then I imagine the cameras would cut and Caan would immediately yell "What is this fucking SCRIPT!?"

PAS: Yeah if you're going to do this stupid cop shit, hire someone who can write some lines, it's LA every guy working at the Sprint store has a NCIS New Orleans spec script, you can't find anyone who can at least script B- cop speak?

2. Joey Ryan vs. Cage

ER: Striker says Cage isn't like one of those Crossfit guys, he's just a normal guy. Yep, looks like any ol' normal guy. Just a regular Joe. Though Vampiro calls him 320 lb. which is just as hilarious. The match is plenty of fun though, even if they don't really follow their own narratives. Cage was especially fun, throwing big lariats with nice follow through, a tight powerslam, big missed corner charge, and putting a nice exclamation point on things with a nasty Screwdriver. "If it's a scoring thing, Joey has more nearfalls in this match than Cage does." Oh my god shut up Striker. But I thought Cage looked really explosive throughout, so it was (mostly) easy to tune Striker out.

PAS: Joey Ryan is who we thought he was. I am not sure Cage v. Mundo is going to be any good but both guys have surprised me so far in this show.

ER: It's fitting that this show is on El Rey, as Dario's backstory is basically the plot of Q: The Winged Serpent, except pro wrestling fleshes out the non-Aztec lore instead of Michael Moriarty as Jimmy the screw up. If this fed ever approaches a scene as great as Moriarty negotiating with cops over Quetzalcoatl's whereabouts and capture, then I will be on cloud nine.

PAS: Poor Rey. Stuck spouting this nonsense. Rey is an all time legend in wrestling, this is like watching Al Pacino in Jack and Jill.

3. Prince Puma vs. Pentagon Jr.

ER: Killer stuff with a bad finish that was already played out in the 90s, that the fans saw coming a mile away. These two work great together so the match itself was wonderful. Pentagon got a nice long non-gimmick match and beat Puma's ass, and I loved Puma using his speed to keep slipping away. Puma moonsaulting into a Pentagon dropkick was just crazy, Pentagon's chops were nasty as hell, Puma hits a big dive, loved the Pentagon corner flip backstabber, I mean basically everything these guys did looked great. I was really into it all. Then Pentagon plants him with that nasty package piledriver, and starts setting up a surfboard instead of going for the sure win. You can hear fans start to go noooooooooo as we all saw shenanigans coming, and sure enough, instead of just stretching him all nasty like, he goes for a stupid pin which leaves his shoulders down. This was maybe the loudest groan I've ever heard from the LU crowd, as right when the 3 was counted most people knew exactly what had happened, because again, that shit was played out 20 years ago. I know popular culture can recycle itself and seem fresh again, but "innovative wrestling finishes" don't ever seem fresh again. A real fart noise to end a cool match.

PAS: This was pretty good up until the end, but it felt a little inconsequential for such a big match. They normally do a good job delivering on big matches in a way that lives up to hype, this felt like a Nitro main event. For the first time ever Hulk Hogan v. Bret Hart, three minutes later the NWO Wolfpack runs in. That finish is stinky, since when is that even a Pentagon Jr. move? It would have worked way better if he had just going for the arm break and had Puma roll him up.

ER: Just when you thought Sexy Star couldn't possibly screw up anything worse than she already has, she delivers two of the worst possible reads you will ever hear. She had about 5 words to attempt to not mangle, and brother, she mangled every single part of it. Not HEEEM....HERRRRRRRR, complete with shaky finger point. Was this a one and done take? What could the other takes have possibly looked like? Did Sexy Star win a sweepstakes? Is she like Batkid, and the whole fed is just banding together to give her the experience of a lifetime?

PAS: Remember when the vignettes were cool? Outside of Vampiro in the insane asylum, everything this season has stunk. Another below average episode. Come on LU give me some love.


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Lucha Underground Episode 28: Shoots and Ladders Review

1. Marty "The Moth" Martinez vs. Prince Puma

ER: This wasn't bad. Moth has an annoying face, and his pratfalls are a bit too dramatic, but he did a good job of involving himself while Puma set up a springboard, and he threw a nice lariat, also threw some poor looking superman punches in the corner. I'm curious where they go with him as debuting him in a (non-title) match with the champ and having it worked fairly even *should* be a big deal, but I don't see his jokester persona as a main event gimmick. Konnan was good at ringside, "He wants to joke? Treat him like a joke!" but Vampiro working his "feud" with Konnan is always lame.

PAS: I like Martinez better as a unnerving creep, then a happy go lucky Colt Cabanaish dude, and that seems to be the direction they are going with him, sort of a wrestling version of Jake Gyllanhall in Nightcrawler. Nice clothesline, and I am surprised how much offense he got.

ER: Mundo was kind of a dud during the interview, but thankfully he had Vampiro there who completely made the segment. It's actually shocking how good Vamp is during this interview segments.

PAS: Yeah Vampiro is awesome as an interviewer, I am a guy who once made $100 writing a magazine article about Vampiro, he is a guy I find fascinating so I am glad he has found a role which keeps me from having to watch him wrestle.

2. Delavar Daivari vs. Texano

ER: LU has a kind of odd habit of putting bigger marquee matches into the middle segment of the show. Daivari cost Texano's team the trios titles, the two went at it last week, but here they're tossed into the middle of the show in Daivari's debut match....and they work a match with no hate, as if it were mid-show filler. Whatever heat these two had during that initial run-in is just G-O-N-E. For two guys that hate each other we start with a dull arm wringer segment and really never get that hot. There's a punch exchange that is just brutal. Texano eventually tightens up, but the first several punches from both men were just winged a foot wide. Daivari looked awesome during his debut run-in, but that is seeming like an outlier performance every time he appears. Also damn, Ryck is really getting around. He'll put out for anybody with money! Odd they turned him tecnico by having his eye get burnt out, but then just have him shack up with Daivari.

PAS: Yeah this was a stinker, this feud is probably the most disappointing in ring feud in this fed. I like Davari's gimmick, but he really should just be a manager at this point, his in ring stuff stinks.

ER: Loved the Catrina/Dario segment, and loved that Dario didn't act like a weenie; just calm, practical. "I can make that happen" as he grips his key. Really well done.

PAS: Dario as evil psycho works better then Dario as ineffectual stooge. Awesome re-intro of Chavo too, I don't know how this Matanza and Black Lotus stuff will actually turn into a wrestling match, but it has been pretty cool so far. Who is playing Dragon Azteca? It would be a cool role for a Villano or Negro Navarro if he gets in the ring.

ER: Chavo is back and this show must have gained some sort of whiskey sponsorship. Everybody on this show was constantly holding a rocks glass. Whiskey sponsorship on Dario's office would be great, and I would kill to listen to Dario insert ads for Woodford Reserve.

3. The Crew vs. Ivelisse, Angelico & Son of Havoc (Ladder Match)

ER: This was super fun and featured the absolutely most crazy wrestling spot of the year. Angelico running and doing a Crouching Tiger dropkick of Dario's office to send Castro flying off a ladder will be burned into my brain. So crazy. The camera pulling back really showed how fucking far he leaped, it looked amazing. Castro also deserves full credit for hanging in there until Angelico actually made contact. The urge to bail early must have been strong. I did a slo-mo back and forth frame by frame Zapruder film study of it. What's great about the spot is that it would have worked well if Castro had bailed early. Angelico would be hurt from the miss, Castro would be hurt on the fall. Still could have taken both men out. But Castro hung in and everything looked awesome. This should play over and over on Lucha Underground commercials. Angelico looked great throughout this, throwing some actual nice whipping punches, connecting on all his leaping knees (including a weird one where he jumps up the apron and into a ring like a praying mantis), also had a rad flip dive onto a ladder that squashes Castro underneath (while Bael escaped. Hmmmm a theme of Castro leaning into everything. Good for him). Cisco has been a top three guy in this whole fed which I wouldn't have guessed going in. His table bump was huge, his offense looks great. I'm a big Cisco fan. Ivelisse limping down the stairs was a good moment, Havoc hits a crazy asai moonsault and then catches chin on an attempted shooting star through a table....this was just plenty crazy and too much fun.

PAS: Yeah this was way better then the trio title tournament final. Mr. Cisco is so great, the bump into Dario's office followed by the crazy tope through the window, might have been my favorite spot of the match, even more then the lunatic Angelico dropkick. I also loved how vicious he was starting the match out, he just throws Havoc into the stairs and starts pounding on him. It would have been nice for the shooting star to be hit more cleanly, but otherwise the finish run was near perfect, just a great build to the big moment of Ivelise crawling up the ladder to grab the belts. This fed is really great at doing gimmick matches, which is not really something I normally like in lucha.


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**NOTE: That ladder match was easily good enough to nab a spot on our 2015 MOTY List, so I'm gonna go ahead and link to that:

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Lucha Underground Episode 26: The Best in the Business Workrate Report

ER: I liked Mundo calling him "Fernandez" and Dario casually correcting him. Still seems odd for Hernandez to be a guy instantly pushed over most guys upon debut. I know most of these things can be explained by "but Dario!!" but sometimes it just feels like a weird choice for the fed.

1. Mr. Cisco & Cortez Castro vs. Angelico & Son of Havoc

ER: Everything in this match was just...off. It seemed like every move by every wrestler *just* missed. Angelico flies over the Crew with a flip dive, Havoc whiffs completely on a split legged moonsault to the floor (taking a way more painful looking spill into the seats), most of Angelico's knees squirt off to the sides, Havoc breaks out all sorts of feather light leg sweeps, even Cisco's spill to the floor sees him going through the wrong ropes...everybody just seemed to be working on different pages. Some of the Crew's double teams looked decent, but this was arguably the worst Havoc and Angelico have looked, and it came in the same match at the same time. Poor showing. It is impressive how over Havoc has gotten, although in this match the crowd seemed mostly interested that Ivelisse was sitting with them.

PAS: I liked this better then Eric did, I thought the Crew looked really good, and had less problems with Havoc and Angelico. I really liked Angelicos kick combos, the leg sweep enzigiri was cool. Mr. Cisco is one of my favorite guys in this fed, he is such a great combo of violent and stoogeish, kind of a short hispanic Arn Anderson.

2. Delavar Daivari vs. Texano

ER: Boy any of the viciousness these guys showed during their trios altercation was out the window here. That was some bad looking brawling. Like Abyss level strikes lobbed a foot past each guy's head. Cow bell shot look decent, but man. This looked bad. I did like Melissa Santos' scrambling "oh SHIT" while Texano rushed the introductions.

PAS: Yeah this sucked, I loved the brawling during the trios match but this was some weak shit. I like the Shah of Sunset gimmick Davari is working, but this was weak shit.

3. King Cuerno & Cage vs. Prince Puma & Hernandez

ER: Hey this was amusing even though it didn't get much time. Cuerno and Cage are good at feeding Puma, Cuerno hit his big tope which we haven't seen in a bit (even if it had a pretty dumb set up since  it required Hernandez to push Puma into the tope, meaning that when Cuerno started setting up the move there wasn't anybody there to actually do the move to). Cuerno is really great at putting over Hernandez. His bumps all look super painful, and speaking of painful bumps how about Puma getting powerbombed on the apron? Yikes. Also, Vampiro needs to stop trying to feud with Konnan.

PAS: That apron powerbomb was nasty, super happy that Cuerno got his tope back. Would like to see him actually have something to do in this fed. Isn't there someone else he can hunt? Do they need to bring in Los Thundercats?

4. Alberto El Patron vs. Johnny Mundo

ER: This was fine, probably the best possible non-gimmick Mundo singles match. Vampiro really needs to stop pushing "knee injuries" in Mundo matches, as he's never going to listen. I get the temptation as Mundo took a nasty spill to the floor, his leg crashing off the wood ring steps in a loud way, even breaking through and splintering one of the steps in a great visual. I loved AdP capitalizing and immediately smashing him with a tope. AdP brings back the Finlay ring skirt spot, and it's crazy that nobody immediately stole that once he retired. Also loved the AdP arm bar after he was playing possum. Mundo actually sold that surprise armbar nicely as it continued to play into the rest of the match (even while Vampiro just kept bringing up his blown out knee. Seriously every single match Vampiro thinks Mundo's knee is just blown the fuck out.), and the match was capable. They filled the allotted time just fine.

PAS: I liked this more then Eric too, what a grump. This felt like the kind of undercard match which would steal a WWE PPV. Nothing remotely lucha about it, but a bunch of cool little additions which put it over the top. Don't know if the ring steps thing was planned, but that into the tope was an awesome bit of wrestling improv if it wasn't. Also really enjoyed the possum armbar and ring skirt spot. Patron is just killing it this year, loved all of his LU stuff and he had a stone cold classic with Roderick Strong in ROH. Totally reinvented himself, makes me think about what similarly misused WWE guys could do with a release. Is there a big time Carly Colon run waiting for us?

ER: Hopefully they explain why Katrina is back with Muertes, or what her plan was from the beginning. It's a little convoluted if we end up getting "it was her plan all along to latch onto a guy and have that guy kill Muertes....so she could then bring him BACK".


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Lucha Underground Episode 24: Trios Champions Workrate Report

ER: I enjoyed the Angela Fong captive lights off training vignette, although in this story the Shaw Bros. and/or Kill Bill stuff is maybe a little on the nose.

1. Pentagon Jr. vs. Sexy Star

ER: God I thought this was really terrible. Star in a long singles is just death as she has no clue how to pace things. Here she sells practically nothing and has no idea how to transition from one move to the next. The most she sells in this match? When Pentagon kicks out of a pin. Seriously, she stomps all over him in the corner, drags him to the middle of the ring, pins him, he kicks out...and then she starts selling like she's been in a war. Drags herself away, holding her stomach, struggling to get up. I had to rewind to see if I missed him doing something unsavory after his kickout. But nope, she just randomly decided to start selling something for the first - and last - time in the match. The rest of the match is just Pentagon striking her or hitting a big move, both of them lying there, and then her getting up and doing a move. It results in her hitting a nice dive at one point, but damn was this match awful. Just horrible layout and then to top it off, a real pointless, rushed result. Pentagon actually gets a bunch of real, actual heel heat, and the next week his actions are already avenged. At this point I reallllly wish Sexy Star was just not around, as all of the booking revolving around her is clearly far and away the worst thing on LU. And that's not even counting Striker and Vampiro talking in their Owen voices for half of the match.

PAS: Yup this stunk, they are trying so hard to make Sexy Star a thing, but it isn't going to happen. Pentagon had no business losing, especially to someone Big Ryck treated like a joke. They go back and forth each week to whether she is a serious competitor or not, she is one of the five worst wrestlers on the roster, and continually placed in big angles. She has the feel of a nepotism push, like she is Mark Burnett's long lost illegitimate child.

ER: Boy that cameraman was really running circles around Mundo/Alberto in that segment. What the hell was that?

PAS: I liked the segment, but I felt like popping a dramamine afterwards.

2. King Cuerno, Texano & Cage vs. Angelico, Ivelisse & Son of Havoc vs. Big Ryck, The Mack & Killshot

ER: Wow I was surprised at how awful this was. You look at that list of names and go "man I hope Killshot isn't in a lot of this" and then Killshot is in this more than any other person. And boy did he look like clearly the worst guy in this fed. Every name I wanted to see more of got dispatched quickly, and every name I did not want to see got the bulk of the time. Willie Mack continues to be a bright spot and I really hope this turns into tons more gigs for this guy. He literally gets better every time I see him. He throws so much into everything, from a standard clothesline to a big fat guy tope. Texano really made Daivari look good, flying hard into a ringpost and spilling out nicely into chairs. But holy shit Killshot. Everything this guy does looks bad-to-horrible, from his offense to the way he stumbles into position to take moves to the embarrassing mannerisms he makes before hitting a move. Here he got to finish off Texano with his finisher "leaping off the top and landing with both feet on either side of your opponent". It's a devastating move that he also uses on the indies. Havoc's offense looked extra pillowy soft (can we just retire that cartwheel elbow into the corner?) here, and there were way too many clunky sections of this. Maybe the clunkiest was that awkward portion where Angelico was in the corner, and Mack, Ryck and Killshot took turns sloooooowly running towards him and finding ways to miss him and fall to the floor. Man all of that looked bad. That's a fairly good way to sum this one up: A lot of that looked bad.

PAS: I watched this with my wife, and she was really irritated by Angelico's overacting while selling. It didn't bother me as much, I suppose that is because I am used to wrestling being an art form aimed not for television audiences but for the back rows of arenas, more like a filmed play then a movie. Still LU is clearly a TV show, so maybe he should tone it down a bit. Liked this a bit more then Eric, thought Big Ryck and the Mack were both great in this, and the Davari v. Texano beat down was pretty violent, still Killshot man, what a turd.

3. Angelico, Ivelisse & Son of Havoc vs. The Crew

ER: Well, this was pretty fun. You may have noticed Angelico's dive. It's still just bizarre to me that this fed doesn't do replays. That dive was the kind of spot you show a dozen times from every single conceivable angle. You bring in extra cameras to make new angles. You watch that Angelico dive and think, what if his foot slips? How easily could you imagine him losing his footing and then crashing down into the ropes and apron? Just a total lunatic spot, one you want to rewind, put into slow motion, then rewind again. Awesome. Cortez looked good here, dropping some nice knees on Ivelisse, and doing an ill-advised but nutty suplex over a ringside barrier into a steep drop on Son of Havoc (which Havoc didn't seem to mind too much, seeing as he was up running around and doing a moonsault seconds later). We'll see where they go with these trios titles as several of the trios matches have been really fun, if we get regular 10+ minute action then these can be a real treat.

PAS: That Angelico dive was so insane, that it made the whole show. Probably the greatest balcony dive in wrestling history, so many of those spots are a guy climbing for a long time to a really high place, take a moment soak in the crowd cheers and fall down. This was awesome because it was a leap not a fall and it pretty much came out of nowhere, no big set up, no four table to break a fall, just some crazy leap to nowhere.


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Lucha Underground Episode 19: Grave Consequences

1. Aerostar vs. Drago

ER: Jeez Louise man. Aerostar. You guys are lunatics. Were parts of this rehearsed as hell? Yah. Do I care? Nooope. Aerostar hits the wild reverse cannonball off the top to the floor, one of the crazier spots I've witnessed. Everything after that is sweet cream cheese frosting. Aerostar sticks the springboard dropkick and then breaks out some Crouching Tiger ropewalk action. Drago pulls out a wild corkscrew moonsault over the top, Aerostar ends it with a great hands-at-side springboard splash. These two continue to innovate, and it's a blast to watch.

ER: Konnan as Hoy Quarlow vignettes continue to rule as this fed has somehow made me interested in seeing Konnan get some sort of vengeance. And nobody with a brain should have interest in anything Konnan. But here I am lord, I'm interested in Konnan!

2. The Crew vs. Big Ryck

ER: This is a 3-on-1 elimination match with no DQs according to Striker. And it's kind of disappointing. The dude gets his eye burnt out, and really comes back and everybody wrestles the same as if these three guys hadn't burnt his eye. It's fairly short for an elimination match, and really aren't they all? Always frustrating when elimination matches get the same length as singles matches, not accounting for the extra bodies that have to believably be pinned. I do like Ryck going wild with weapons, crashing Cisco's body through a chair, violently beating everybody with a busted cane, but for three men Ryck was made to look way too unstoppable. I mean if he tore through these guys this easily what's really stopping him from ripping Cueto's office door off the hinges and gutting him!? I still like The Crew's corner dropkicks but really they looked like total weiners here.

PAS: That was some great looking pomp and circumstance to set up the casket match. Having it brought down by spooky Day of the Dead mimes really added to the match. So much cooler then any of the fancy Undertaker entrances.

ER: Totally agree with Phil there, usually wrestling doesn't get these kind of cool visuals. These days we just get 80 shots of guys standing in the same frame as the Wrestlemania sign.

3. Mil Muertes vs. Fenix

ER: Casket match time, baby! Muertes starts things with a big ass dive and eventually attacks Fenix with a respectful funeral arrangement (I predict Phil will make a joke about Bodie buying flowers for Deangelo Barksdale's funeral. Don't let me down buddy). Fenix goes for a dive and Muertes throws the fucking casket into his face. Was not expecting that one. Fenix gets busted straight open and Muertes chokes him with the ring rope support eyelet. Back in and Fenix gets hurled recklessly into the coffin (propped up in the corner) and leaves a spectacular dent in it. This match really got special when things moved into the crowd, and there was honest to god competent crowd brawling. Not just one guy walking while loosely holding the other guy by the hair, these two were fighting all around, taking mean spills; the fist fight at the top of the arena looked great with both men throwing bombs while standing on the edge of a steep fall. Fenix gets launched headfirst into a heating duct, and really Fenix made this section by bumping around painfully into everything, flying into rails, going headfirst into surfaces, getting splatted by a powerbomb. Mil beat him around the arena and Fenix engaged, and it was beautiful. The double stomp finish into the coffin was great, and while I wish they would have figured out the ending a little better so Catrina didn't just immediately get up from the lariat, that is a minor complaint and this whole spectacle was wonderful. Best LU match so far.

PAS: This was really awesome, I haven't particularly liked either guy a ton in Lucha Underground before (have loved some AAA Mesias), so I was really surprised at how great this was. This was the first time that Muertes has looked like a real killer, all of his little stuff landed with real force, and the big moves like the throw into the coffin were awesome looking. There is this great moment where Muertes is just smashing Fenix's head into the guardrail, like he is trying to open up a coconut. Bloody main even spectacles are one of my favorite kind of wrestling matches, and we haven't had one as good as this is quite a while.

PAS: One of the cool things about Lucha Underground, is the because they have access to the entire AAA roster, they can have guys come in, work a story and leave. One of the big problems with the WWE is that they have the same guys every week, and they only leave if they get hurt or join the UFC. Muertes can be buried alive, disappear for four months and then come back as a bigger deal. It is the kind of thing that the territory system allowed, which is missing in wrestling otherwise.

***ER: We've added the casket match to our Match of the Year list, and decided that for now it's the #1 match that we've reviewed this year. Will it stay #1 all year? No way to be sure, but we've already watched a lot of wrestling in the first 3+ months of the year so it landing at #1 at all is a feat in itself, and we're confident that at the end of the year it will still stand out as being one of the most unique, memorable and great matches of the year.***

2015 MASTER LIST

LUCHA UNDERGROUND MASTER LIST

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