Lucha Underground Season 2 Episode 13: Monster Meets Monster

ER: Man, I thought Dario was setting up an Aerostar/Fenix/Drago trios team and that is far more exciting to me than a team with PJ Black.

1. Aerostar vs. Drago

ER: Striker says Drago is going through a sophomore slump this season, but he's only faced Jack Evans ad competed in Aztec Warfare. And he wasn't treated like a joke in those. Is it his fault the promotion is dead set on focusing on Sexy Star and Killshot every damn week? Flyer vs. Flyer matches are usually major disappointments, and this was no different. These guys need a base in there to pace out the match and transition them to their next flying spot. Without that, you have two guys not really sure how to smoothly move into their next moves, so they end up hitting a big spot, lying there, and then just getting up so the other guy can hit a big spot. For two guys with some graceful abilities, they sure do manage to look really clunky while setting each other up. To get into position at one point, Aerostar misses a clothesline and somersaults through it...except Drago was just ducking down on a knee that whole time, not moving. So you have Drago taking a knee, motionless, and Aerostar walking past him, throwing a perfunctory clothesline two feet over Drago's head, and then just somersaulting right next to him. Man that kind of shit looks ugly. Aerostar worked a knee injury throughout the match, rubbing his knee and then blowing a springboard spot, and going back to his knee later on. It didn't go anywhere, as Drago never touched it and Aerostar kept doing flying moves. Eventually, one of those moves got a three count. This match would probably look really awesome as a minute long youtube video. But the real deal was a major disappointment.

PAS:  I did like how they worked around Aeorstars blown dive, it makes perfect sense for a guy who tries so many crazy spots to crash and burn on some of them. Sabu blowing dives actually helped his mystique for me, he came off as a completely unhinged maniac willing to do anything to win. I would have much rather seen either guy against a rudo, they really need to bring in Steve Pain to base for these dudes.

ER: "Making me work for it. Classic Cueto." Nice read, Mundo.

2. Jack Evans, PJ Black & Fenix vs. Disciples of Death

ER: Dario says DoD have to be considered the favorites, because they're former champs and are used to teaming together. I mean, they were awarded the titles and have never actually won a match, or even controlled the majority of a match. But sure, let's act like these guys aren't basically the Spirit Squad but without an awesome trampoline entrance. Oh god, now they have names? Have they always had names? And this was the best the DoD have ever looked, but to what point? They still looked like jobbers, and the vignette of Catrina promising Muertes that "they won't disappoint you again". Well, they've literally done NOTHING but be colossal disappointments. Which is what you get when you make Well Dunn out of lightning. Here they had to stand around numerous times waiting for the storyline "uncooperative partner" drama to play out, but they never even got to capitalize on it! Evans would refuse to tag in, DoD would wait around for them to sort it out, and then they'd still not have the advantage! So all that shit was stupid, and it overshadowed what was a really great Fenix performance. Through all the bullshit and all the jobbers being treated like actual threats, Fenix blasted those masked shitheads with kicks, hit some slick dives, and generally looked like a star in a match that didn't really allow for that. PJ hits his nice springboard 450, sometimes the DoD look good but nobody gives a fuck which one looks good and which one doesn't, but this was a nice Fenix show.

PAS: I liked Jack Evans in this too, and it was a fine goofy spot fest, still I am with the DoD hate, what a bunch of total goobers, glad we are finally done with them, although I am hesitant to embrace singles Sinestro Del Muerte.

ER: Welllll...TWO of the Disciples of Death are dead, after getting Temple of Doom'd by the bacne'd member of DoD. If he has the ability to rip the hearts out of electric men, what was he doing stooging for Jack Evans comedy spots 10 minutes ago? How were they losing matches when they have heart ripping ability?!

PAS: Yeah that was really stupid, this guy can appear out of nowhere, and rip hearts out, you figure he might be able to get a fall on PJ Black.

3. Mil Muertes vs. Matanza

ER: Yeah buddy, there aren't too many match types that I love more than two monsters colliding. And these two collide and it is glorious. Matanza is good at showing vulnerability, and Muertes looked like a flat out beast. Muertes hits the best powerslam you've ever seen here, and Matanza does those crazy rolling gutwrenches. I loved Matanza's huge bump over the top, leading to Dario getting involved more than he's ever been before. He takes his first bump off a Muertes choke (really Dario taking a spill should have been played up huge), and it's smartly placed to allow Matanza more time to recover from what looked like a legit nasty spill. I liked all the chairshots and gas can/water can shots. Once they got on the office I sensed a gimmick finish, but even with the gimmick finish Dario totally made it, with the camera doing a couple great shots past the monsters, directly into Dario's horrified facial expressions. I'm really excited to see these two collide again, probably a couple times.

PAS: This was really great, I think Matanza running through people so far makes it a bigger deal when Muertes is able to take him down and hurt him. Super props to Dario for taking that big bump, that is not a normal part of a character actors job. The brawl up the steps was nasty with both guys walloping each other with gas cans and the final bump was crazy and memorable. It was a an obvious first chapter and I can't wait for the second.

ER: The cop show stuff at least gets a little more intriguing without the direct involvement of Castro and Ryan, as TV's Renegade, Lorenzo Lamas comes in to talk about the mayor. If they got Lamas for just a Councilman, who could possibly be the mayor!? Edward James Olmos?? Phil was really kind of adorable flipping out about Lorenzo Lamas over text. "He was in Falcon Crest!!"

PAS: I watched this show before Eric and I teased him with a text that LU debuted its biggest name yet. Eric was "Bigger than Rey? Is it Santo?", and undeniably Lorenzo Lamas is a bigger name, he was the Renegade!!


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Lucha Underground Season 2 Episode 10: El Jefe is Back

ER: Weird that Striker didn't point out that Chingon is Robert Rodriguez's band. You'd think he'd have all sorts of face slap worthy facts to spout. But I really liked Dario back in the temple, and liked him telling Pentagon that maybe he wasn't "champion material". Pentagon's reaction was understandable, but check out Cueto's awesome instincts when he clutches his arm in tight to his waist to try and prevent Pentagon from breaking it. How many times have you see wrestlers lock on something like a surfboard, and the wrestler taking the move willingly goes along with the sequence and just holds his arms up for his opponent? And here's a non wrestler who gets it.

1. Taya & Johnny Mundo vs. Mr. Cisco & Cortez Castro

ER: This seemed like a match long internal battle wherein Mundo tried to throw the worst clothesline possible. Castro had a nice kick on Taya to start, and then he had some meh kicks the rest of the match. Cisco had some nice moments with Mundo, really dug his big punch. Taya isn't that good when she's not taking big spills, her timing is all wonky and her moveset is loose. If we're going on the sliding Sexy Star scale then she's excellent. But in these matches she's not much. And why the hell were they already hinting at a "feuding tag partners" thing with Taya/Mundo. We don't even know who she is or why they're teaming, just that they've been affiliated since her debut. And now in their first actual tag together he's tagging himself in and stealing pinfalls. It seems like they not only skipped a few steps, but skipped steps to get to an angle nobody would want to see.

PAS: I like Taya's look and I think she fits well with Mundo as a pair of sleazy heel crossfit trainers, but she is really tentative and off looking in the ring. She takes huge bumps, she should probably just be a Sherri Martel like valet, not everyone has to be a wrestler. Mr. Cisco is my favorite under the radar guy in this fed, just so fun to watch.

ER: Man, Marty the Moth has a wildly punchable shitty face. He's like the Mark Teixera of LU. And look at that, we see Mariposa in action beating up unknown luchadors in suits. Hey good idea, guys!! Showing debuting workers beating up random luchadors is LU's "We know who that is!!!"

ER: I still don't know how they haven't gotten any bourbon or scotch companies to sign up as LU sponsors. Cueto would be so great at wedging the brand name into the sketches. "Oh Catrina, I didn't see you there. I was lost in my...Woodford Reserve" (Dario looks at camera before Catrina quickly turns his head toward her).

2. Elimination Match: Ivelisse, Angelico & Son of Havoc vs. Disciples of Death

ER: Oh god these scrubs are still around? Were there only two trios teams at this set of tapings? The gold one takes a cool fast bump through the ropes to the floor. Is that Argenis? He jumped into Angelico's flying knee nicely as well. The purple one was decidedly worse than the gold one. I think he fell over before even being hit by an Angelico flip dive. Angelico had a bunch of cool stuff throughout, dug his run up the apron, jump to inside middle rope knee. His knees usually look cool, though, so this isn't news. Son of Havoc's body presses land pillowy soft but damn him hopping on two DOD members off the top rope was neat. And then his two topes were the first time the match really felt any sort of real excitement or energy. What is the point of DOD again? Also, I assumed at the beginning of the season that they were building to a "Catrina loses her wig" spot, but now I'm pretty sure that she's too serious for that to happen. But it's getting really distracting seeing her holding onto her hair every time she has to take a bump.

PAS: Yeah there were occasional moments from the DoD but man what a nothing group they are. They need to cut bait on these guys, I like the idea of Muertes and Catrina having lackeys, but they need cool costumes and way better wrestlers under them, and they need to be built strong, not like goofball jobber scrubs. I liked Angelico in this too, can't believe he has turned into a wrestler I don't mind watching, his early IWRG days were a tire fire.

3. Sexy Star vs. Mariposa

ER: What the fuck was the point of this? So Moth and Mariposa held Sexy Star captive for some time, then we don't really hear about any of it, and then they just fight with no real build up, both women look bad, and then the match ends. It was mercifully short, but this feud and the Mariposa character are DOA. This violent kidnapper with her savage creep brother just kind of throws some goofy ass stomach punches and whiffs on a sloppy moonsault, while Sexy Star just does a bunch of bad rope running. This was all embarrassing.

PAS: I kind of like Marty the Moth, he is a total sleaze, but Sexy Star is a black hole of interest. Also I feel a little weird about them pushing her as this feminist hero the whole first season, only to have her kidnapped and presumably sexually abused in between seasons. Whole thing just rubs me the wrong way.

4. Pentagon Jr. vs. Matanza

ER:  Boy Matanza (btw "Matanza Cueto" sounds realllllly stupid. Let's just keep the monster on a first name basis, shall we?) is going to be a real tough character to book going forward. Will fans respond to a character in 2016 who sells no offense from anybody? Will he just operate at an untouchable level above every other worker? They have to create a weakness for him at some point, but what will it be without being something silly like Undertaker's urn? Are we going to have somebody melt down Dario's key to harness Matanza's powers? Cobb is a beast and his deadlift throws are awesome, we get our NOAH rail ride/LU guy tossed through chairs spot that I love, but I could see the Matanza character getting real difficult real fast.

PAS: It might be the end of great main event matches, but I thought that was a pretty impressive one sided beat down. Pentagon Jr. will be back I assume and this sure as heck gives him a incentive to come back strong. I liked Pentagon Jr. using the X arm signal, often that Russo break kayfabe stuff irritates me, but here it looked like a guy who was afraid for his life.

ER: Pretty flat episode after some very good ones. Maybe we need that breather episode so we don't get too spoiled. Or something. Dario's segments were a welcome return on this show, and that's really the only thing that kept this episode from being completely terrible. The Sexy Star feud would be a dud even if it was not Sexy Star in the feud, and the Disciples of Death still appearing on TV in any capacity - let alone still competing in matches where Striker talks about how evil they are - is a head scratcher. Famous B wouldn't even give these assholes his card. If anything though the episode set up a couple of future stories that could pay off down the road, with a new trios tournament and Vampiro potentially bringing back Monster Pentagon. But we shall see.


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Lucha Underground Season 2 Episode 8: Life After Death

ER: Dammmmn Fenix and Catrina bring the sensuality, with tender arm caressing and neck touching and gentle tear wiping. I bought in. You can't fake upper arm caressing or waist touching. Shit's real.

1. Ivelisse, Angelico & Son of Havoc vs. Disciples of Death

ER: We get another major stipulation literally mentioned as an afterthought, as Melissa Santos does ring intros and as she's exiting the ring goes "Oh, the team of Ivelisse, Angelico and Son of Havoc have agreed to leave the temple forever if they lose." Oh. Okay! It immediately telegraphs the ending, although it would have been quite the hilarious boner if it hadn't. I mean, they hadn't wrestled on TV in a month, and I can't think of a more last minute way to announce a major stip like being gone FOREVER, so by doing that either you immediately reveal the result (which is what happened),  or you treat a major stip - again - like an afterthought. So stupidity aside, and it was stupid, the match was fun. Short and rather inconsequential, but fun. Disciples of Death are second only to Sexy Star in terms of Striker's commentary not ever matching up to anything we've ever seen. "This team is hate personified" "Don't be alarmed by their violence" This is a team who has beaten Pimpi teaming with a mini, lost to Puma/Pentagon without ever even having an advantage despite them being on the privileged side of a handicap, and then got handily beaten here. This is not a team anybody is scared of. Billy Zabka's skeleton gang looked far more menacing biking after Ralph Macchio. They aren't violent, they don't wrestle any bit out of the ordinary. They have never, ever looked threatening. Nothing at all about them is "the embodiment of pure evil". One of them did a really nasty stretch muffler on Ivelisse. That, I liked. Your tecnicos all looked good with Ivelisse standing out, as she has better facials than the other members of her team it's easier for her to make stuff more meaningful.

PAS: This was fine, the Ivelisse, Angelico, Havoc team have turned into a consistently entertaining act. Ivelisse is by far the best in ring female act in the fed and has been able to make the otherwise terrible mixed matches tolerable. The Disciples of Death are such goobers, a total zero. I like the idea of Muretes having a group of evil henchmen, but if you put jobbers like Ricky Mandel and Argenis under spooky masks you just have masked jobbers, and every time they wrestled they felt like that. I hope this is the end of this concept.

2. Bullrope Match: Chavo Guerrero vs. Texano

ER: This was a weird culmination of a pretty bad, very rushed feud. A few weeks ago Texano dominated a 3 on 1 handicap match and lost due to cheating. That kind of thing tends to lead to a cage match or something, but he's a whipmaster so for whatever reason it leads to a bullrope match. I guess that's his special match? They do a decent job, but this whole feud was dead out of the gates anyway, and a bullrope match doesn't tend to be a good visually violent match. I'm sure getting smacked with a thick rope hurts like hell, but it's a violence that hurts more the next day than to the TV audience watching at home. Still, this had moments. Chavo was effective getting yanked around by the rope, off the top, splitting his uprights; Texano took a nice spill through the ringside chairs, and spills through ringside chairs have officially become their version of a NOAH rail ride or a WWE ring steps bump. I like it. The chairs bump is the best of the three as you get tons of motion, like getting tossed into a swimming pool but you get rows of chairs rocking and sprawling. So yeah, okay enough match for what it was, and hopefully the feud is over. Texano has really been quite the muffled fart in LU so far.

PAS: I like Chavo, and I think he has had some nice character moments in this fed but he hasn't really delivered a great match, this was the closest to a good match, as there was some nice violence, but this could have used some blood or a bit more ferocity. I would have no problem if we never see Texano again.

ER: Muertes finally dispatches the Disciples of Death (at least two of them), flipping out and chucking them all around the locker room. I mean that's what happens when you summon a trio of jobbers from the netherrealm. You don't have Hogan recruit Joey Maggs and Frankie Lancaster to do his bidding.

3. Fenix vs. Mil Muertes

ER: Great great big match feel from the guy who has been probably the best big match worker of the last year plus. These guys both know how to read the room and that's important in a big match epic. It's not that far removed from just doing heatless spots in a questionable order. But this whole thing built and Fenix was really able to bring the fight to Muertes the Insatiable. Muertes would stomp him down and pound him through the mat but Fenix was so great in the struggle, so great at fighting back and surviving. Once masks started getting ripped you knew this shit was heating up. That's a thing we've seen a lot in actual lucha, but I don't believe that's a road they've traveled down in LU, as right when Mil started ripping into Fenix's mask it had an Oh Shit feel to it...and once Fenix started ripping Mil's mask it had an OHHH SHIIIIIIT feel to it. Once Muertes spears the shit out of Fenix off the apron things really start to feel real, and as they brawl through the crowd and the bloodied up Fenix is rubbing through people, Muertes just ups the ante by awesomely shoving Fenix into the crowd as he's running towards him on the rail. That was not what I was expecting. Just a bullying, tossed off shove right into the crowd. The fans help Fenix back, and the lunatic runs right back onto that rail, launching himself at the farthest point right into Muertes on the floor. Muertes gets pissed and back in we get nastiness like a DDT off the top rope and a vicious urunage. You haven't seen a urunage this awesome since grumpy old man Hiroshi Hase wrestled a trainee. But Fenix keeps fighting, and just when he's down that's when he sneaks in a superkick, or a rabbit punch, tricking Mil into punching a chair, just annoying Muertes with his mere survival. I was not actually seeing his victory coming. I was looking forward to a long Muertes reign, just a dominant monster on top of his throne. Fenix getting the win was a big surprise and a nice moment, but now I'm wondering what the angry godlord is going to do to get his title back. There's something special about not just an epic, but a main event epic, and this totally delivered.

PAS: This was a killer match, that is three great matches this pair of guys had in 2015. I am pretty sure Fenix got his mask ripped in Grave Consequences too, but Fenix tearing Muertes's mask and blooding him up was a great moment. Fenix is awesome at throwing in crazy highspots in ways that fit in perfectly,  there are a lot of guys in LU who do cool shit, no one makes it matter as much as him. Muertes is so great, he is maybe the best guy at working at vulnerable monster since Vader (Brock is great, but I think I would take Muertes over him.) Great overcoming the odds victory, which makes the goofy post match a little worse, they should have let the victory soak in a bit.

ER: They announce that Aztec Warfare is now for Fenix's just won title, and Fenix is now the #1 entrant, and Mil is now the #20 entrant. That kind of stuff is starting to feel way too overdone and "The Authority" when I'd rather just see Mil murder somebody. We'll see how that works, but this show was mostly a win, and you can argue with that main event it was a major win. And this show needed a win after the last few weeks.

PAS: I totally agree, that kind of stuff is very bush league heel authority figure stuff. This fed is at its best when it does its own thing, and there is no need to book like a tossed off RAW episode. This is the same instinct that brings in guys like PJ Black, and it isn't a good one.


***Muertes/Fenix is an easy add to our 2015 Ongoing MOTY List, because apparently every time these dudes match up it manages to be completely great***


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Lucha Underground Season 2 Episode 2: The Dark & The Mysterious

1. Johnny Mundo vs. Killshot

ER: D'oh! I know I was cursing myself last week when I kept saying things like "They featured all the most important people on the first episode!!" Then right out of the gates they give me the double middle finger Killshot appearance. But really, as a whole, this wasn't bad. Killshot has really poor body language and sometimes appears to be moving in slow motion, but he also hit some of the better sequences I've seen from him here. Mundo is clearly way better as a heel as he tends to tighten some things up, and it was satisfying seeing him blast Killshot with a big elbow. The Killshot DDT off the ropes was real nasty, and him being in the wrong place kind of added to a couple moments of this match, like when Mundo hit the springboard kick that Killshot almost forgot to turn around for. This was probably the best match anybody could have hoped for.

PAS: Naw bruh, this stunk, it didn't have the blown spots one might expect from these guys, but this was also clearly chopped to shit. I can only imagine how bad the uncut version of this match is, lets hope there isn't a Lucha Underground Classics show in 10 years where we see the full versions of all the matches. I don't know if a good opponent for Killshot exists, but I know Johnny Mundo is the worst possible opponent for him. Also if you are debuting Justin Gabriel why have Killshot do a shitty 450 the match before, Gabriel is all 450, he is more 450 then the pair of guys working Mr. 450 gimmicks (WHAT UP JERELLE CLARK!! I SEE YOU HAMMETT!!), don't snatch that dudes only thing.

ER: Oh hey, Sexy Star is back. But as long as the Moth keeps her tied up and away from a wrestling ring he'll be the biggest tecnico in the company.

ER: PJ Black pulling over to fight skinny motocross guys in a motel parking lot was a little silly, but I guess you gotta give a guy something to do in vignettes. Darewolf? There wolf. There castle. Maybe he was actually supposed to do an Airwolf gimmick and the printer messed up the shirts? I know if he brought out an eye-patched Alex Cord as his manager it would be a clear upgrade over whatever a Darewolf is supposed to be. Wait was Jan Michael Vincent the wrong one legged man who Ace signed instead of Gowen??

PAS: This was one of the lazier vignettes. Don't we already have a biker stable? Don't we already have a smooth chested ex-WWE midcarder with long black hair and elaborate kick combos? When LU writers are out of ideas they just have someone randomly street fight luchadores, it has lost its luster a bit.

2. The Mack vs. PJ Black

ER: Fun debut for Black, and naturally the whole time the match was going on I was getting ready to type about how they really backed themselves into a corner by booking the debuting Black against a guy who should be featured more prominently, and how this is a step backward for Mack after having his big match with Cage at Ultima Lucha, and how he really needed to be seen winning after taking the curb stomp through the cinder block, and how he's now gonna have to take another loss and blah blah blah I was totally wrong and should have had more faith that this is not TNA and they won't just bring in any old WWE worker and immediately push them as a far bigger star than their existing talent. This was exactly the way the match should have been handled: a nice back and forth match with a decisive Mack victory, showing Black that he has his work cut out for him in this new company. Mack has potential superstar written all over him and it seems like the company realizes it. Some of Black's capoeira looked a little dodgy, but Mack was always right there with a big kick or chubby moonsault to snap me out of it. Fun stuff.

PAS: Mack looked good as usual, I loved his open hand Ronnie Garvin chops, but I am not going to give them too much credit for not doing the dumbest booking move. I was amused at how Vampiro shit all over Black and his stupid gimmick on commentary, but I don't really get the point of having an announcer do that.

ER: I'm not sure who Moon Kobra is. I couldn't recognize her from her chin/eyes. I don't think the promotion was hurting for another female as I'm not interested in seeing even more intergender matches, but if this is a step toward a woman's division I'd be happy with that.

PAS: That vignette was exactly the same as PJ Black's without the motorcycling, this fed really has a problem with doing the same thing multiple times on one show.

3. The Disciples of Death vs. Prince Puma & Pentagon Jr.

ER: Decent match, although not a great way to make your trios champs look very formidable. I like the storyline idea of Muertes the Insatiable trying to take out the people who he views as his biggest competition, but DOD didn't ever come across as very threatening even with the handicap advantage. That aside this is the best I remember the DOD looking, with the one in a white skull mask (sorry don't know their names) throwing some especially snug strikes. Puma does some crazy dives to the shock of everybody. Although I really don't like Pentagon as a put upon guy fighting the odds, I like him more as lawless monster serving a master for purposes of evil. Having him on the short side of a handicap match is just opposites day, and took away from things for me, even though the ring work wasn't bad (though it did feel choppy and a little disjointed at times).

PAS: This felt like a very lazy bit of RAW booking. Feuding tag partners in a handicap match is a lame-o wrestling trope I can't imagine anyone actually liking. Thought the work was fine, although the DOD are pretty much the Cruel Connection at this point.

ER: Final segment was really cool and exciting, and right when I heard a voice off camera I thought it sounded like Rey. I avoid spoilers as best as possible for this show, but I had heard Rey rumors. This is exciting stuff. So even though it was a clear step back from last week's debut, it was still a pleasant (and quick) hour of TV.

PAS: I am jazzed for Rey, but I would rather not have him stuck in the dipshit tar pit of the Dragon Azteca storyline. Still Rey is the best.


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Lucha Underground Episode 38: UltimaLucha - Part I Review

We get a return engagement from Tomk for this final pair of episodes

1. The Mack vs. Cage (Falls Count Anywhere)

ER: Well this was awesome and completely exceeded the high expectations I had for it. These guys laced into each other and it's as if every move they did was the exact move the crowd was hoping for. This would have been good in a vacuum but it was even better because they both clearly understood who they were working for. They worked in a little comedy and personality, but never lost the viciousness. The brawling through the crowd was some of the best of its kind, punching and throwing each other into spots instead of walking gingerly together. Fans scrambling out of the way added to the insanity. Cage getting speared through a door was totally unexpected and Cage took it like a lunatic, almost like he wasn't expecting it either. The way the camera shot it, and how fast he flew back through the door, it was like he was being sucked out of an airplane at 30,000 feet. All of the bumps and spills on the floor were nasty, and then Cage goes and does an inside out superplex over the guardrail onto the balcony. Jeez. I was hoping they wouldn't go the cinderblock route when I noticed them, since I thought Ambrose/Rollins already pulled off the best worked block spot. But they did and while it exploding was pretty silly, it made sense as a match finish. These two have been real standouts in multi mans and I was just really wanting a brutal singles match, and they totally delivered.

PAS: Yup this was pretty great, they have done a really nice job with the non-luchadores in this fed. I have enjoyed Mack or Cage way more in this context then any other. Mack especially comes off like a hugely charismatic star. It was smart of them to recognize that and move him quickly out of the Big Ryck and Killshot group (and to relegate Killshot to the jobber battle royal last week). I haven't seen any really great lucha matches from Lucha Underground but they really know how to do insane brawls. I also liked how this didn't even bother to go into the ring, most of these brawls have a section where they go into the ring for the finish, the advantage of LU being a television product, is that they could do away with that trope.

TKG: I really like that at this point I feel like I know where stuff is in the Temple. The way I knew various JAPW buildings so during this kind of crowd touring match you know where guys are going to end up. 

The Miller sponsorship continues to amuse me. There was a point where Steve Austin was one of the biggest figures in popular culture and the WWF with Austin was drawing huge attendance and ratings. The WWF wasn't able to negotiate for a beer sponsorship then, while these guys can pull that off? Or did the WWF not want a beer sponsorship because they somehow thought Miller wasn't as prestigious as Lugz boots? Can't be that, it's the WWE, if Bill Saluga wanted to host RAW, they would be thrilled and treat Saluga as a giant star. Gawd, the Saluga/Kane skits... You can call me Glen or you can call me Isaac...

2. Disciples of Death vs. Angelico, Son of Havoc & Ivelisse

ER: Is one of the DoD really named Barrio Negro? This whole thing threatened to get good at a couple points, but there were too many little problems all throughout for them to overcome. First, Ivelisse has a leg injury. That is fine. We've worked around it well enough to this point, gives their team some character depth. But here we had evil beings named the Disciples of DEATH...who had to noticeably work around her injured leg. When one of the DoD goes for a sub on her he has to go out of his way to grab her healthy leg. If I was a Death Disciple, I would probably be a cruel evil being who would take advantage of every single one of my opponent's weaknesses. I'm not saying I want her hurt leg further injured, but I would take a weak, super fake looking submission on the hurt leg over the already flimsy submission we ended up with. These men are created out of lightning! But then we get moments of "Oh we can't work over that leg, that's her leg that's actually hurt". Their characters are manufactured out of lightning for the sole purpose of murder! Second, the promotion still does no replays. This is a multi-camera shoot. They have at minimum three different recorded angles of Angelico's dive. But I guess this show is a "movie", not a sport event. Movies wouldn't show replays of significant moments. But that is also a fucking stupid approach to pro wrestling. I don't need the WWE overkill of constant "earlier tonight" reports all throughout Raw, but you have a skinny human being hurling himself off of a balcony, and you should be showing that more fucking times than Brian Lee going off a scaffold through tables. Whatever. I liked Havoc's consecutive dives, loved the Angelico dive (duh), but the DoD are pretty boring and I'm not looking forward to more of them. Any idea on who they are? I'm curious if it's good workers working poorly in a gimmick, or just poor workers.

PAS: This was the least of the trios title matches they have run, you could see the seams a little bit in this match formula. Angelico's big dive is crazy as usual, but at this point you are just waiting around for him to do it, it isn't the shock that it was the first time, it is turning a bit into a New Jack thing where the whole match is the song and the dive, and these Angelico matches don't even have a cool song. DoD are kind of cool looking, but otherwise pretty lame and sticking random jobbers under the mask (I think its Ricky Landell, Argenis and Marachi Loco) really hurts, I feel like better performers would have been able to do something with the gimmick.

TKG: Back around 2003 or so there was an amusing editorial written to the observer website complaining about Gabe Sapolsky winning booker of the year. The guy complained that all Gabe did was hire cream of the indy scene and the put them in dream match ups, that wasn't what booking was about. Booking was about having to put together a card with an ex wwf midcarder past his prime, the cousin of his favorite ring rat, a steroided guy afraid of muscle tears, the money mark's son, a regional star who can't bump any more and two green kids who can't run the ropes. Not about having a super talented roster but rather hiding the roster's weaknesses. One thing that can be said about Lucha Underground is they were fucking great at hiding guys weaknesses. It's a fed with 4 tough enough wash outs that found ways to make all of them semi compelling. They created a pretty entertaining face tag team here where you essentially knew everyone's story and their relationship to other members of team and found way to book them to work a midcard version of what are essentially  Public Enemy v Gangstas v Eliminators formula send crowd home happy ECW main events. Nicely put together crowd popping spots where no one gets exposed.

ER: I enjoyed the Miller Lite plug within the context of Cage/Mack. Thought they integrated it as well as possible. But damn Striker's Miller toast followed up with "Mmmmmmm that's so refreshing! So good!" is just about the opposite of the spectrum. Nice read, Velma. Not as good as Vampiro drinking out of a clearly empty can and saying "That's good beer, brother."

3. Hernandez vs. Drago (Believers Backlash Match)

ER: Fun match with a totally absurd stipulation that totally worked as a unique stip. It's not something we need to see regularly, but I loved that we got to see it. On paper it seems like a stip that is almost inviting something to go terribly wrong. What if somebody is throwing a blow and Hernandez turns around and takes a strap right to the eyeball!? My friend Sean went to an indy show in a bar years ago, and there was a weapons brawl. There was a boombox getting used, and at one point the boom box was on the floor and Sean moved it so nobody would trip over it...followed almost immediately by somebody getting power bombed onto it, because they hadn't realized it had been moved. So now you give belts to 20 fans...that's some guts on Hernandez to take numerous runs through that gauntlet. What if you get some guy being a loose cannon all excited because he's gonna be on TV?? You can argue that it got in the way of a good singles match at times, but I think it's a testament to how underrated Hernandez is that he put it over as well as he did. And also, that fucking tope into mist-and-then-floor was insane. People will be talking about the Angelico dive but this was just as crazy but in a different way. Striker had some nice moments during this, and I especially like him explaining why Hernandez was able to get out of his Drago Clutch.

PAS: This was also a pretty great gimmick match, it is too bad Hernandez may have burned his LU bridges, because he really hit his groove here as an asshole heel. You don't usually see a guy work as both monster and comedy stooge and he does both well. Also damn does he take a beating, not only does he get the skin strapped off his back by random fans, but that missed tope was one of the crazier bumps in a fed full of crazy bumpers. 

TKG: I've seen a ton of fans with straps as lumberjack matches over the years. It's not a match that always translates well outside of live audience, Seen some good ones. Seen some bad ones. They're matches that I've seen guys who do workrate sprints struggle with. You kind of need a heel who knows how to work like kneepadless Budro or Austin Idol to really pull them off. As ideally they're about the heel and the fans, and need a heel who knows lots of ways to mime taunts at fans and lots of ways to do googly eyed stooging when getting whipped by fans. I realize that I've been watching Hernandez' career disinterestedly since 1999. Saw him working like Rod Price in FMW on Texas indies, watched him working as part of a fake Sheik tag team in AJPW, watched him blow up trying to be a roided workrate wrestler in ROH, watched him work as workrate fake Angle in AJPW when Red was working fake Rey, watched him work as fake JAW Heavyweight tagged with Homicide in TNA, am watching him here. Somewhere between TNA and Lucha Underground he picked up some mid 90s Austin Idol tapes and instead of studying the mic work, studied the in ring stuff. and he's been all about the Fargo strutting and miming since he showed up in Lucha Underground. He was the perfect guy for this match. As pretty much everything in ring was a mess but all the fan Hernandez interactions were great.

This if course wasn't a one man Hernandez show and a ton of credit needs to be given to the ponytailed plant among the fans. According to Fredo he's a local worker who he has seen work as Fidel and he was amazing here. Always in the right place, snoring big, setting up the big spots, set up the fans refuse to hit the face spot (which is really key to match working), kept on feeding himself to Hernandez, bumped big, ate dives, and just directed traffic. A star making performance. I know nothing about him but his sense of ring awareness makes me want to seek out his work.

So I was looking up to try to figure out who was the other guy in the Double Iron Sheiks with Hernandez and according to multiple internet listings it was Beau James' cousin KC Thunder which is ridiculous. I refused to believe it at first but Zellner claims that accurate. Hillarious as KC Thunder is guy who works as spectacularly great superheavy Austin Idol in U.S.A. but worked nothing like that in AJPW where he was doing gaijin w suplexes. Amusing that Hernandez spent majority of career trying to work like K C Thunder in Japan , while it looks like Hernandez's real strengths maybe in emulating KC Thunder in the US.

ER: This was an excellent start to UltimaLucha and I cannot wait to see what they have in store for the finale. Everybody is clearly busting ass and if this is it for them, I have a feeling they're going to go out with a bang.

PAS: Yeah career matches for Hernandez, Cage and Willie Mack make this a hell of a show, although they really could use some more actual lucha in this fed to mix up the brawls, three variations of street fights in one show is getting a little ECWish, they should have had something like Aerostar v. Jack Evans or Aerostar v. Drago in the middle.


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Lucha Underground Episode 31: The Desolation of Drago Review

1. Blue Demon Jr. vs. Chavo Guerrerro

PAS: The rematch 31 weeks in the making. Man I guess I get that Demon Jr. is iconic and all, but he is poopy, and I am bummed he is back. Listless nothing brawl from Demon in a blue suit and Chavo. Thought Chavo looked crisp and like his alliance with the Crew but this was pretty meaningless.

ER: Just think where we all were in life 31 weeks ago. I was a young, virile 33 year old, head full of dreams. Now I'm a worn out zombie of a 34 year old, victim to the inevitable march of Time. I would love to hear HHH's Tough Enough take on Blue Demon's back bumps. Replacing B-Boy with Chavo is a major upgrade for The Crew so that's a good thing. But yeah this wasn't much.

2. Disciples of Death vs. Pimpinela Escarlata, Mascarita Sagrada & Bengala

PAS: Kind of strange to debut your new creepy monster tag team against a comedy trio. I love Pimpi, but demons from the underworld probably shouldn't have to sell fear of his taint. Bengala is apparently Ricky Marvin, and that dude has gotten tubby. Nothing I love more then a tubby highflyer and he hit some cool stuff. I am not sure who is under the Disciples masks, but I was pretty unimpressed, cool look and some cool mannerisms, but not much in the ring.

ER: I couldn't get a feel for any of the Disciples, but none of them looked very good doing the limited things they did. Their formula appeared to be weak stomp -> weak clubbing forearm -> tilt your head to the side -> take a long time to set up your two triple team moves. I do like Ricky Marvin coming in, and am also amused at Phil fat shaming him when he looks maybe 10 lb. heavier than when I last saw him. That Phil can be a real catty bitch. Liked Marvin's tornillo, liked Pimpi flying crotch first into a fan, but overall this wasn't good.

ER: "Johnny, you gave me a black eye. Who cares? I look great in sunglasses." Dario is awesome. But then Dario agrees to put Mundo in a 45 minutes match, and suddenly I don't find him as awesome.

3. Drago vs. King Cuerno vs. Hernandez vs. Cage

PAS: Drago gets in the match because all four guys had previously fought Puma, but because was banned he had to put up his mask. Awesome more impromptu mask matches, one of my least favorite things about this fed. This was a fun indy four-way which is a match type this fed does well. All four guys hit very cool dives, although it was pretty ominous that Cuerno was calling out Killshot, I was hoping he was Matanza food not a guy getting a high profile singles feud. Seemed to be setting up Cage v. Cuerno, but they never really faced off. For a guy putting up his mask, never got a huge amount of urgency from Drago.

ER: Awesome new gear on Drago, love the bat wings. And not only did they inform the TV viewer of the mask match in an earlier vignette, it appears like they announced it to the live crowd literally right before the bell. That is just so so stupid. Also, I was actually bummed when Drago got banished from the fed. I figured he was actually gone for good, or at minimum several months. But here we are like 5 weeks later and I haven't even had the chance to miss him. That's just lazy and pointless writing, and you can only play loose with stipulations so many times before a fanbase doesn't care. Right now there's a nice little bubble of people who are way into this fed, best to not squander that. Vampiro also points out how scaly Drago is looking, and I'm now thinking they should have saved this gimmick for a young flyer with psoriasis. I mean that is a skin condition that practically looks identical to the name of a famous luchador anyway. Starting to feel like a missed opportunity to bring some charity awareness to it. But I liked the match, I think just about every 4 way the fed has put on has been good. Couple rough moments like Drago and Hernandez not really catching Cage on a moonsault to the floor (though that did inadvertently create a good reason for Cage to be on the floor during the pinfall), and of course Cuerno takes the loss because fuck that guy apparently. Still, good action, and their 4 ways never overstay their welcome and that's a very important and often overlooked thing with this kind of match. I liked little moments like Drago going for a double clothesline and not budging Hernandez/Cage, dug Cuerno's right hands, Cage's surprisingly effective moonsault, and both men know how to work well in a multi man, without everybody getting in everybody's way.

PAS: This fed constantly makes the same weird booking mistake, running the same kind of thing on one show in multiple different ways, diluting the impact. We have had shows where multiple guys were breaking up with their valets, multiple shows where Puma faces a muscled up monster on the same show that Fenix faces a muscled up monster, now we have a show built around the return of the exiled Drago on the same show with the return of the exiled Blue Demon Jr., the exiled Chavo Guerrero Jr., the exiled Mascarita Sagrada and the exiled Escarlata Pimpinela, basically every wrestler who has been sent away from the temple all came back on the same show. It makes no basic storytelling sense.

PAS: This was another lackluster show, and I don't have high hopes for an hour of Johnny Mundo next week

ER: I think the last match at least made this episode better than Episode 30 (which was one of the worst of the series), but next week's iron man match with Mundo has me not expecting much. I mean, how many good iron matches have even happened in wrestling history? Rude/Steamboat is easily the best. Does Rock/HHH hold up? So right there we have one, maybe two good iron man matches, ever. That doesn't give very good odds for next week. And with that, Catrina's tits bring us to episode's end.


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