RIP Virgil: A Weekend With Vincent

For the last 2+ years I've spent every day writing a book painstakingly reviewing every single match that took place in 1997 WCW. One of many guys making this project worth continuing has been Vincent's work as the nWo's Enforcer, the man stationed to the front lines who doesn't actually realized he's the weakest link of the coolest gang. It's a great role made greater by everything that Vincent brings to it. Here are two classic nWo Vincent performances from a summer weekend of 1997 WCW TV. These are the first two WCW reviews I've posted publicly on Segunda Caida since starting the book, and it feels Correct that my first full preview of what my WCW book will be like is to honor Vincent. A Real Character. 

Each match is under 2 minutes and showcase Vincent's incredible charm. His ability to act cool without realizing he's not. I don't think anyone actually did it better. 

DDP vs. Vincent WCW Saturday Night 8/9/97

The story goes that Charles Wright was the guy in line to get Vincent's eventual spot in the nWo, but seeing the perfect way Vincent embodies his Lowest on the nWo Totem Pole Role, I really can't visualize what The Godfather's place would have been. Vincent's role was an important one. A wrestling stable of a certain size needs a clear weak gazelle, a man there to take bumps that the higher ups won't take and stare up at lights the higher ups will never see. Without Vincent, the nWo might be more formidable, but I'm not sure how it would work. Would Wright and Norton have teamed instead of Norton and Bagwell, and would Bagwell have in turn wound up as the nWo Vincent? I'm not sure if that's better, because Buff really thrives in Vicious & Delicious in ways that I don't think Kama The Extreme Fighting Machine would have. Vincent is too damn good at being exactly what he should be in the nWo and to the nWo that the other ways just don't make sense. Adding one guy to the bottom makes the whole group better. 

Who else in the nWo would have been pinned by DDP on a Saturday Night, taking 30 seconds of a 90 second match to even lock up, reacting visually to the boos of the crowd and even flinching at DDP's BANG? Vincent spends the match making a beeline for the ropes any time DDP locked in a slight advantage (which was every time contact was made), sticking his body through the ropes to make the ref back DDP up, DDP kicking him in the ass while Vincent's torso is halfway out of the ring and those tight Guess jeans are framing his perfect set inside the ring. When Vincent finally steps to DDP he walks right into an elbow smash and jabs, a big kick to the stomach. His knees are turned to a fine powder with DDP's pancake piledriver, a move I'm surprised more guys didn't just refuse to take. Vincent takes the Diamondcutter like he was writing a manual for 2009 Christian. Heaven needed a champion, and the nWo needed a Vincent. 

The Giant vs. Vincent WCW Pro 8/10/97

This is incredible. This is the moment. And I fully understand why the cameras cut away from this moment, but whomever chose to  do what, it was incredible. Upon entering the ring Vincent attempts to "roll" in over the top. He doesn't attempt to enter the ring like Solar with any kind of beautiful arc, but more like a guy skinning the cat into the ring. Rolling over the top, casually. Smoothly. Except Vincent, upon holding the top rope and rolling in, clearly gets hung up between the middle and top ropes, and so the camera cuts away for several seconds. When they cut back Vincent is only just getting himself untangled from the ropes. This man rolled into the ring and got hung up in the ropes like they were made of fly paper, then stood up and walked to the center of the ring like a man who didn't just loudly shit his pants while stepping into a room where all eyes were on him, casually removing his sunglasses with the biggest smile on his face. 

I hold firm to my belief that Vincent knows exactly what character he is playing, knows his exact role on the entire roster hierarchy, and perfectly understands that he is the man who needs to act untouchably cool while also stepping on any possible rake in sight. For all we know, the camera cut was only unfortunate timing, and Vincent was actually intentionally lying across the middle rope, in the same way Jeff Jarrett lies across the ropes in the corner to taunt his opponent. But I choose to believe that Vincent was hung up in those ropes like he was caught in a tuna net, and that he 100% knew exactly what he was doing, and fully understood his role as a guy who thinks he's cool and has no actual idea that he is not, but would also do whatever it took to maintain his status as the least cool guy in the Cool Guy stable. 

Getting stuck in the ropes was only the beginning of Vincent's brilliant Zero Offense performance, as the cool guy getting into the ring in the least cool way possible then tries his damndest to stay physically away from The Giant. He avoids contact as long as possible and is scared the entire time he's in the ring, and it's all perfect. He at first acts like he's merely circling behind Mark Curtis while circling the Giant with good intentions, but then he Hey Buddy claps Curtis on the back the way a stranger would when he was about to force a man into doing an unexpected illegal favor. A man passes you on the street and gives you a head not and a shoulder clap, suddenly you find yourself as a human shield. As Vincent fully hides behind Mark Curtis in the corner, Curtis - a human shield who was in no real danger - looked like he had no idea Vincent would be holding him as a shield for so long, and looked to actually be trying to wriggle away so Vincent could take his medicine. And Vincent is that, a child trying to not take medicine. 

He takes comic flat back bumps when he gets thrown to his back and headbutted, gets kicked in the ass when stumbling away, dragged back into the ring as he was trying to frantically army crawl the floor on his stomach. His crossbody is caught, and Giant's backbreaker is among his most backbreaking, even though his insistence on keeping his hands balled into fists while clutching Vincent -  instead of gripping Vincent's back and balls with full increased pituitarily outstretched hands - shows he is a Giant who feels shame and is no wild giant at all. He has the restraint of modern man's guilt showing through those balled fists, and it is a tell that all of Universal Studios can read. Were they to meet an actual Forest Giant, they all know that beast would have no problem gripping them squarely by the ass and genitals for any reason, and now they all know The Giant is no beast, but simply a large man who has been sadly touched by mankind's insistence on feeling shame. Imagine The Giant asking someone which ear is "the gay ear". Sad. 

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Dirty Dick vs. Slick Ric: 1996 Syndie Series

Our buddy TomK found an odd two match Syndicated Series of these two matching up in 1996. It is a classic WCW 90s puzzler. It's heel vs. heel, totally random and pretty fun.

Dick Slater vs. Ric Flair WCWSN 3/27/96 (Aired 3/30/96)

PAS: This was a World Title match, Slater's first World Title match since he worked a house show series of Texas Death Matches against Flair in 1989 (CageMatch is the best). This was heel vs. heel with Flair accompanied by Miss Elizabeth and Slater by Col. Parker. This was brawling Flair mostly with a lot of chops and his fun downward punches, and he gives Slater a bunch of offense. Finish was a classic piece of horseshit: Elizabeth tells Parker that Woman wants to see him in the back and he struts to the back in full Robert Parker mode, Woman is tremendous as a soap opera temptress, asking Parker if his ring was really Elvis's ring. While Parker is in the back ready to pull it out, Flair rolls up Slater and puts his feet on the ropes for the pin. No idea why this match happened, no idea why they ran such a goofus angle around the finish, but it was totally great stuff.

ER: I loved Schiavone calling this match like Slater had a genuine shot at the title, and I like Flair in control mode with a guy with some clout. It's fun because Flair would come on the B shows and work stooging matches against guys like Joey Maggs or JL, but then brawl like a heavy with someone like Slater. We get some cool Flair punch angles that we don't often see, like his cool right uppercut that he rarely throws. Sadly we get a weird clip in the middle, not sure how Slater got Flair into the figure 4, but we get an awesome moment with Slater fighting for a backslide for a good 2 count. It looked like something Slater specifically did to make it more dramatic, just act like it's tough to hook Flair into it and then fight it over. We see so much slick execution these days that seeing a guy milk a backslide is just incredibly satisfying. Slater takes a nice bump to the floor and a nice heavy backdrop, and that finish was definitely a Col. Parker-specific WCW finish. I don't think there was another non-wrestler during this era of WCW who got more camera time during matches. At this point when I see one of Parker's boys is in a WCW match I just assume we'll get a few long shots of him being distracted by a wily female. They at least go to a split screen while he's getting conned by Woman (I've seen several matches where they just cut away from a match to see Parker trying to get his dungus wet), and I loved Slater flipping out on him after the loss, but you have Parker as your manager and you know that snake is gonna bite you occasionally. Not intentional Parker/snake reference.

Dick Slater vs. Ric Flair WCW Pro 5/11/96

ER: This is a much more complete match than their prior encounter and had a constant back and forth, with Slater reeling from hard Flair knife edges and throwing some nice punches back, and Slater trying to out-Flair Flair and work the leg by yanking it and locking in spinning toe holds. We get Woman likely driving ringside males crazy with interference while wearing a 90s gothy minidress, looking like if you took all of the hottest qualities from every girl in The Craft. Chris Cruise talks about how hobbled Slater is after 20 years as a wrestler, doing a nice job of building a little sympathy for the guy, and we get plenty of cool moments like Slater kicking Flair in the face from the apron with his cowboy boots, or Flair really planting his knee on a missed kneedrop. Finish was nicely set up by everyone throughout the match, as Slater goes back to the spinning toe hold but leans his face in too close and gets poked in the eye by Dirty Ric, then popped with a weapon from Flair's trunks. I dug how the announce crew was talking about how this match would be a battle over who was the dirtiest player, sounds like a fun weekend show title they could have changed hands a few times.

PAS: I don't really remember seeing Flair work this kind of hide the object match before and it was a fun finish. I love how this was sold like a series, with Dusty mentioning the WCWSN match, and how this was a battle to see who was the dirtiest player in the game. Slater worked this more like a babyface, not really cheating but brawling and taking it to Flair, often preempting Flair's attacks, catching him up on top and blocking his punches. Flair was full heel and had Woman interfere and eventually won with a knucks shot. I feel like a face Stud Stable versus heel Horseman feud could have been awesome and this was a little taste of that.

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My Favorite Wrestling: WCW Pro 6/22/96

Billy Kidman vs. Jushin Liger

ER: Weird little match that I did not remember happening. Does anyone remember heel Liger working a mini run on the WCW D show? This is short but plenty of fun, Kidman was a good guy to get beat around, and Liger had no issue beating Kidman around. We get some slippery wristlock roll throughs to start, but Liger tires of that pretty quickly and lands a handspring elbow and drops him with a great brainbuster. It is kind of odd that he worked the brainbuster into the match so early, as he ends up winning the match with a superplex/bodyslam/top rope splash, which all looked tough but that brainbuster is a thing of beauty. He also hits that fantastic rolling kick into the buckles. Perhaps the oddest thing about the match is right smack in the middle of it, Kidman hits one of the best shooting star presses he's ever hit. It was short, quick to the mat, and landed really nicely right across Liger's chest. The fans went nuts, right when it was hit, Liger kicked out at 2. I didn't realize a shooting star press (done against Liger!) in 1996 was a kicked out of move in the states, or anywhere. Also odd that Liger immediately went back on offense right after such an awesome move. So the structure and layout was all over the place, but the match itself was really fun, which is basically what I watch these shows for.

Disco Inferno vs. Johnny Boone

ER: I love when Boone shows up, he's a big bumping jobber and he usually looks like a slightly cleaner cut Jamie Dundee. That has never been more true than in this match. He's wearing turquoise tights/singlet top, and the tights have purple and pink tassels. He has the same kind of shaved sides short mullet, but no dirty mustache, instead the beginnings of an IT guy goatee. Boone is a great guy to have on a roster though, he'll take a Hot Shot painfully, he'll throw a dropkick that's one of those great Memphis dropkicks, like Lawler's, and he'll hold a schoolboy tight. I should think of a different way to phrase that last part, so that SVU crimes bots don't find this site and begin tracking down me AND Boone. So let me explain that when Johnny Boone really holds a schoolboy tightly, what I mean is that he holds that schoolboy so deep and tightly that it's very difficult to escape or kick free. Fixed it.

Steve Armstrong vs. V.K. Wallstreet

ER: "Let me talk to you about Mutual Bonds, Steve Armstrong." There's nothing that confuses these Florida tourists more than one of those stock market tycoons. Wall Street was in theaters so many years before this match. Armstrong is really great here. He's the same size as Wallstreet and works like it, which is a nice twist on a jobber match. Armstrong holds a snug headlock, takes a big bump through the ropes and that hard stage, big flipping bump on the low knee. Steve Armstrong is also a man who holds schoolboys tightly. This match is fantastic because Wallstreet does all his most bullshit bullshit, holds an abdominal stretch in the ropes at weird time, holds a couple of nice chinlocks, but the fans respond in a HUGE way! ALLLL of Wallstreet's stuff gets the crowd absolutely rabid for Armstrong, which is wonderful. The fans are going crazy for an Armstrong sunset flip and a roll up, and is going nuts when Wallstreet eats boot in that stupid spot where a guy is apparently going for an axe handle to a lying down opponent. Armstrong even hits a great stiff arm southpaw lariat for a nearfall. But Wallstreet quickly ends the fun and just hits a big samoan drop for the win. Fired up fans for heavyweight Steve Armstrong? Yes please. Match ruled for that.

Nasty Boys vs. Public Enemy

ER: Did the Public Enemy live in the studio where they taped Pro? I swear these guys never leave, they just haunt MGM Studios in Orlando. And this is babyface Nasty Boys, which is weird but it's kind great to see them coming out and slapping hands with fans. Sags is even chatting with fans in the front row. He totally makes this chubby white kid's day, leans in and asks him "how are you doing buddy?" while rustling the kid's cap (white shirt with a white baseball cap, like he had been out whitewashing fences earlier that day) and the kid excitedly yells "ALRIGHT!" This kid's eyes were beaming, totally made his vacation. The match itself wasn't great. It's weird seeing Sags as a face in peril, with Rocco working wristlocks on him. It gets plenty of time and it wasn't awful, but it PE weren't very interesting on heel offense, you get clumsy moments like Knobbs not really rolling out of the way of a Drive By, but everybody acted like he was. Plus, if you're watching a Nasty Boys match you kind of just want to see them be unprofessional. I don't want a very sympathetic Nasties team. They're from Nastyville. The breakdown was pretty good, with Knobbs finally in and throwing a big lariat to both PE. But the out of the ring stuff that ended the match was great, with both teams brawling to a double DQ, and Knobbs getting hiptossed off the apron through a table, but instead bounces off and over the table, onto the stage, and down the two steps of the stage to the floor. Knobbs hits like 5 hard surfaces on his way down, then got up punching. So we ended as strongly as possible.


COMPLETE AND ACCURATE WCW B-SIDES

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My Favorite Wrestling: WCW Pro 6/15/96

Jushin Liger vs. Eddie Guerrero

ER: Sheesh you throw on a disc of Pro without looking up match lists ahead of time (pro tip: if you're looking at match lists before popping in ANY TV wrestling from 20+ years ago, you're doing it 100% completely wrong. Not knowing what's next is almost all of the fun). Liger is wearing his sick black/gold/silver gear, and tons of fans in fannypacks are super excited by Eddie. And this completely owns. They start off with a bunch of quick stuff, and then Liger takes over with a great rolling capo kick, fat somersault senton, an actual fast and violent looking handspring back elbow, big powerbomb, throws nasty palm strikes to back Eddie into the corner, really dishing out a beating. Fans are amped for an Eddie clothesline but Liger plants him tailbone first over his knee with a backbreaker. Liger is a total dick in this and it's great. Sadly we cut to finish shortly after that, with an Eddie frog splash. That's the one micro downer about syndicated WCW, the finishes are usually pretty sudden and/or predictable. But all of this was awesome. This kind of thing isn't really a hidden gem, as any time someone like Liger turned up on TV, that was going on comps and getting traded. This was a match an internet wrestling fan would have booked in 1996.

Kensuke Sasaki/Masa Chono vs. Steiner Brothers

ER:  Well this episode hit banger status pretty quick. The layout of this was cool, as the evil Japanese team jumps the Steiners and gets an early advantage by being sneaky and cheating, but the Steiners each hit painful belly to belly suplexes on them and Scott hits lariats. So we start with a bunch of big dudes crashing into each other, and then Chono tells everybody to calm the hell down and we start working a nice southern tag with Team NJ cutting off the ring, Chono working a nice cravate. I dug things slowing down and driving the Florida white shirts crazy, and it built to a nice Steiners comeback. Rick catches Chono up top and hits a big suplex, Scott hits the Tiger Driver and an awesome Frankensteiner, fans go nuts. Steiners against a team who has no problem taking a beating is always gonna be fun. Chono was a real hoot in this, stooging around holding his back, bumping for stiff Steiner stuff, crazy episode so far.

Scott & Steve Armstrong vs. Public Enemy

ER: I swear Public Enemy is on every fucking episode of Pro. But then I always end up kind of enjoying them. So many people in the crowd have fannypacks, it's insane. But this is fun. Armstrongs throw a zillion dropkicks, and PE kind of suck but they also have no problems trying stupid shit. Some of their stuff doesn't work, but they try it and shrug it off pretty well if it doesn't. Scott takes a big bump to that hard Pro stage, and they tease Rocco giving him the Drive By through a table on the floor, but Scott scrambles away and Rocco does the Tiger Mask feint, and I bet if I was a little younger when Public Enemy came into WCW I would be WAY into them. If I saw them putting someone through a table one time, single digit age me would flip out. Rocco does do the Drive By to Scott, but not through a table, just on the mat, and he protects him really well which was something I didn't realize PE did. So that's pretty cool. I liked this.

We get a big WCW Motorsports infomercial, with Sting and DDP hanging out in a pit crew, an announcer running down how Car 29 has done in some recent races, how cool Diamond Ridge Motorsports Inc. is, and the WCW pit crew getting face paint like Sting. I bet when WCW bought (leased?) a racing team, one of the pit crew guys made a joke about how they'd all have to wear face paint, and the other crew members laughed because how stupid would that be? And then a month later nobody was laughing.

Scotty Riggs vs. Ric Flair

ER: I always love seeing Flair working small studio matches, though it is an eternal drag to see him accompanied by Woman and Elizabeth. The whole match you have Cruise, Dusty, and Zbyszko selling the Great American Bash (airing the next day) with a main event of Arn/Flair vs. Kevin Greene and Steve McMichael, and Larry is going on and on about football players with big mouths who think they can be wrestlers, and brings up Alex Karras getting beat by Dick the Bruiser and crying and limping all the way home, and Dusty cuts him off with "You're still talking about that 20 years later!?" You know he is. And this match rules. It goes 11 minutes, and Flair bumps around the whole time for Riggs, and any momentum Flair gets is because he cheats or has Woman cheat. It's so ridiculous and so awesome. Flair takes two big backdrops, tons of back bumps off shoulder blocks, flops on his face after getting punched, works the mat with him, gets beat in a knucklelock, basically a guy in the main event of the next PPV giving 80% of a long TV match to someone who doesn't get on PPV. It's great. Woman claws at Riggs' eyes after he takes a super fast bump to the floor, Flair jabs a thumb into his eye and throws great headlock punches, and Flair drops a clean kneedrop. Riggs gets some pretty great nearfalls, the best coming from a roll-up when Flair attempted the figure four. And the finish was fantastic, with Riggs going up top and Flair falling into the ropes, causing Riggs to take this painful as hell looking Hamrick bump where he falls off the ropes and catches his knee on the way down. Flair immediately goes in for the kill. This was a tremendous TV main event, easily comp tape worthy, and totally surprising. I had no thoughts on Riggs before this match, and suddenly Flair gives me an affinity for him in 11 short minutes. This is a total WCW syndicated classic.

Easily one of the best episodes of Pro you'll ever see, the 4th most important WCW show at this point of 1996.


COMPLETE AND ACCURATE WCW B-SIDES

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My Favorite Wrestling: WCW Pro 4/6/96 & 4/13/96 Redux

ER: Rachel and I had some drinks on a Saturday, and played Tokyo Jungle, then I got the craving to watch some WCW syndicated pro wrestling. What I didn't realize, was that I grabbed a disc of WCW Pro that I already reviewed, three years prior. I obviously had no memory of it, it all felt new to me, but I went through two full episodes of Pro before finding the old reviews. So I thought it would be fun to post both of my reviews side by side, with drunk me from Saturday night, reviewing the same matches as (presumably also drunk) me from 2015. It's kind of fun to see me comment on different things in the matches, comment on things I possibly missed, but also make some of the exact same jokes and act like I'm saying something profound and for the first time (when it turns out I had some of the same revelations years earlier, apparently). Oh, and also, I skipped the Konnan match. Once I knew I had already watched it, I decided that in life there's just no need for a man to double up on Konnan matches. Here are the musings from the two viewing sessions:

4/6/96

Barrio Brothers vs. Craig Pittman/Jim Duggan

ER15: I have no memory of Sierra and Santana actually being called "Fidel Barrio and Ricky Barrio". I mean I have no memory of Ricky Santana in WCW, let alone as Ricky Barrio. And this was not good.   Sierra leaned out of all of Duggan's clotheslines (which were not thrown with much authority anyway), and then Pittman/Duggan just worked arm wringers on Sierra for what felt like 3 minutes. This has a classic WCW syndicated finish. The call to go home happens right at the 4 minute mark, except only the ref and Duggan know about it, so Santana breaks up the pin at the 2 count and Nick Patrick just calls for the bell anyway. This really seems like it happens every few shows. I mean Santana literally pulled Duggan by the leg off of Sierra, and Patrick didn't even count the 3, just called for the bell after 2. Usually it seems to happen in Konnan matches.

ER18: Whoa I had no idea Pittman and Duggan were ever a team, and this starts the night off with classic innocent 90s jingoism. A flag waver and a drill sergeant taking on a couple of mulleted ambiguously brown people. But it's strange to me that a team of Cuban/Puerto Rican workers wouldn't be huge territory babyfaces at the Florida tapings. If they did there shows in a Florida neighborhood and not a theme park for white families, you would get a totally flipped reaction running this match. I want the entire fucking series. Duggan throws some big meaty fists and I am much more of a Duggan apologist the older I get. This was fun, though I wish it had a bit more clubbering and less "Pittman holding an arm". Still, there were some nice shots, Santana takes a big backdrop bump, you'd dig this.

Scott Norton vs. One Man Gang

ER15: I had no idea these two ever matched up, and right when Gang came out I realized it was a match I REALLY wanted to see without having ever thought about it existing before. Like, Norton walked out and I was like "oh okay, a Norton singles match. Didn't realize he was getting singles matches this early in WCW." and then Gang came out and I was like "I WANT TO SEE THIS SO BAD!!!" I had no idea Gang was still working WCW at this point. The Konnan US Title loss was a few months before, and I don't remember much of him after that. So was surprised to see him pop up here. And it was awesome. BUT only 3 minutes long. Heartbreaking. But these 3 minutes are really good with both men working stiff with big clubbing blows and punches. Gang towers over Norton here which shocked me. I mean Gang looked enormous here, a good 6" over Norton. Rachel, not knowing the size of these two relative to others, thought Gang was Big Show size. Really carried himself like a giant, but worked really quick here. He took a huge bump off a Norton lariat, hit a super fast avalanche in the corner, really able to both bully Norton around while also look vulnerable. Norton will never have a problem clubbing a dude, and the match-ending powerslam he hits on Gang was epic. Picture Norton doing his normal fast high arc powerslam, but to a guy as large as Gang. Crazy finish. Two more minutes, shoot probably even one more minute and this would be a great find. As it is, it's wonderful, and they cram a lot of stiff action into three minutes, but just needed a *bit* more.

ER18: Ohhhhhh shit this is a big boy banger right here! One Man Gang is such an undeniable wrestling badass. He throws these hard downward elbows, big fists, and has a couple different super nasty face rakes on Norton, ripping at his nose and clawing at his mouth. No more than one minute into the match, this turns into a straight up shoot, as Norton stands up and punches Gang right in the fucking ear a couple times. This cruelly only goes 2.5 minutes, and you want 5 more minutes of these two beating the shit out of each other, but Norton hits a big ass rotating powerslam for the win, and I can't complain too much. But with even 2 more minutes this match would be legendary status.

Men at Work vs. Public Enemy

ER15: Boy there were a lot of Public Enemy tags on syndicated WCW TV. Many of them not good. This one? This one totally worked. PE just throw out nothing but clotheslines, and Mark Starr and Kanyon bump all over the place for the clotheslines. Men at Work would gain a minor advantage, stop and mockingly do the PE dance for all the white-shirted losers, and then PE would hit another clothesline. Clotheslines all around! Sometimes double clotheslines! There were no less than 13 clotheslines in this match. Clothesline, flat back bump. Then Rocco hit the asai moonsault on both guys, and put it away with the Drive-By. There must have been some kind of in-joke here. Or, Grunge and Rock just wanted to throw all of the clotheslines, and Men at Work had no problem with that. Men at Work did throw a nice double elbow drop at one point. Whatever, this all worked for me. Most of these guys are dead now.

ER18: Well, when you watch wrestling from 20+ years ago, you're going to eventually hit a match where everybody in it has been dead for 5+ years, and it takes the mood into total Bummersville. But these guys ain't dead in April '96, and this match rules. There must have been a backstage bet going on at these tapings because we've seen some nice stiff work from everyone tonight. Men at Work were a fun team that probably never had the chance at a great match, but they worked as really fun fake Barry Windhams. PE kinda suck but Rock's somersault senton lands hard, and the match was good.

Shark vs. Pez Whatley

ER15: Tenta...doesn't give Pez a whole lot here. There's a good leapfrog segment that allows Pez to show off his hops, Tenta crushes him with a nice elbow, hits a real nice falling slam, steps on him a bunch. After Shark gets the never-in-doubt win, Chris Cruise says "Well...it would appear...that maybe Pez Whatley never had a chance." It would appear so.

ER18: Pez goes for a single leg and Dusty freaks the fuck out and starts screaming that Pez is trying to bite Shark in the knee. Shark's singlet is one of my favorite outfits in wrestling. I love Tenta. Shark hits a big elbow drop and leg drop, big avalanche, hits the Shark Attack reverse bulldog (a pretty cool finisher that was only used a short time). We're on a pretty bleak run of dead guy competitors, and Pez really didn't offer a ton, but I always love seeing Tenta.

Ice Train vs. Lex Luger

ER15: So before you know what happens in this match, let me ask you how you would have guessed this match going. I would have guessed "test of strength, couple of shoulderblocks where neither man goes down, Ice Train gets a miniscule advantage, Luger calls for it to go home out of nowhere 2 minutes in." That sounds like exactly what you were picturing, right? Don't act like you expected this - what actually happened:

The match went almost 10 minutes, Luger gave Ice Train practically the WHOLE match, Ice Train won by DQ when Jimmy Hart attacked him with the megaphone, then Luger got punked out by Norton and Train after the match. Seriously. That's what happened. Luger stooged for Train the whole match. Train worked over Luger's arm and Luger put it over huge, sold his left arm, clutching it to his side, even setting up runs for Ice Train by doing things like missing a corner charge with his bad shoulder/arm. He gives Train everything. He even puts over Train's strength by going for a pinfall and then comically launching himself off of Train on the kickoff. And Ice Train really really really does not make the most of this gift. He looks so bad throughout so much of this. His punches are just impossibly bad. His arm work and Fujiwara armbar are surprisingly good, even tossing out a legdrop to Luger's wing at one point. But then he went and hit the worst drop toe hold I've ever seen. Luger didn't know what it was supposed to be. None of the announcers had any idea what it was supposed to be.

Actual exchange after the alleged drop toe hold:

Chris Cruise: Well I...believe that may have been some...maybe a drop toe hold?
Larry Z: Well we might never know unless we get...Quincy on the case.
Cruise: Quincy!?
Dusty: Quincy!! Quincy hasn't been on the air in 10 years!
Cruise: Maybe 20!
Larry Z: Look...with 80 cable channels you can find anything...
Dusty: Quincy Adams! Quincy Jones!
Larry Z: You know what...

Norton runs in after the interference, Luger clubs him and Norton completely no sells it, then Luger BEGS OFF!

I mean, this was awesome. Luger just totally stooged the whole time for a guy who really didn't deserve it. 1996 Luger has been just so consistently good.

ER18: Luger in '96 was really good, and I'm not sure why a bunch of us were such idiots back then. Was it always uncool to like Luger, like it would take points off your smart cred? Luger in '96 was like Big Match John Cena, if he embraced a heel side. Luger had this cocky smirk and gave Ice Train 4 straight minutes of big bump selling, getting leveled by shoulderblocks, stumbling and falling on his face, begging off, and after that he starts raking Train's face on the ropes and dropping big man elbows. He grabs a bearhug on a guy bigger than him, AND IT LEADS TO AN ICE TRAIN BEARHUG REVERSAL!! Ice Train pulls of a credible press slam kick out. Luger hits a big backdrop slam that Ice Train has the balls to stand right up from and Ice Up. And Luger generously shows more ass, taking a backdrop bump, getting DQ'd when Jimmy Hart hits Train with the megaphone, begging off from Scott Norton postmatch and eating a double clothesline. Luger was a fucking god in 1996. He is so much better than people ever gave him credit for.

4/13/96

State Patrol vs. Fire & Ice

ER15: This was really fun, and according to Chris Cruise the debut of Fire & Ice!! Historic!! Parker is a guy who won't back down and he jumps Train and immediately stiffs him up. It doesn't last long as Train gives Buddy a massive backdrop and a lariat right into Parker's throat, then Norton tags in and steamrolls him with a shoulderblock. State Patrol get to double team him for a bit, choking him out on the ropes and clubbing him, until Norton does a cool double vertical suplex on them. Finish is Norton hitting his nasty shoulderbreaker on Parker followed up with a huge standing splash from Train. Really fun tag.

ER18: Chris Cruise is saying this is the first time we've seen the Fire & Ice team, I am on such a great run of Pro because you know all of these dudes are gonna beat the shit out of each other. State Patrol are probably a team worth of a Complete & Accurate (though I'm leaning Beverly Brothers), and Parker is great. A C&A Buddy Lee Parker really should happen. He stiffs up Ice Train with elbows, takes a ridiculously high backdrop bump, eats a shoulderblock from Scott Norton that would separate my shoulder, but work convincing double teams and strike hard. Fire & Ice dish it right back though, and Norton hits an absolutely world shattering shoulderbreaker on Wright (rough enough that Rachel asked if those were illegal now), and Train laid it in with a super high Big E style splash. This was really damn good.

V.K. Wallstreet vs. Cobra

ER15: This was maybe the most offense I've ever seen Cobra get. He throws a nice dropkick, some decent-ish punches, threw a really nice high arc powerslam. A lot of guys threw pretty nice powerslams during this era WCW. But Cobra really was a guy who seemed green for several years. I once saw somebody selling a "Super J" comp tape from their tapelist. I assumed initially that it was some Super J Tourney Comp, but no, it was legitimately a Jeff Farmer comp, just during the time he went by Super J. That is probably the weirdest comp tape I've ever seen.

ER18: Cobra is a guy who really should have better, but he was a fun generically handsome 90s straight to video hero, the kind you'd see opposite of Lance Henriksen and think "Man why doesn't this Lance Henriksen guy get better gigs?" Wallstreet has a rep as a boring guy who would hold an abdominal stretch too long, but he's popped up for me in a few weirdly good performances these last few months. He had an awesome IRS/Kerry Von Erich match that I'd never seen before, that had this cool section with KVE fighting for a claw and IRS trying to tangle him up in the ropes. And here Wallstreet is throwing sharp back elbows and big shoulderblocks against a big dude, planting him with a powerslam, really looking like a tough guy. There are some good Rotundo performances out there, and I'm happy for him.

ER18: We get an amusing promo from Ric Flair, sitting with champagne in front of a lavender backdrop, with Woman at his side and Elizabeth lying down behind him like Simone Simon in Cat People, and Flair just talks about what a lucky guy he is and how much he loves women and how jealous Randy Savage must be of him. This guy needs a beating.

The Giant vs. Butch Long/NOT THEE Manny Fernandez

ER15: Manny Fernandez is announced as Vern Henderson here. I always feel for jobbers when they get their name announced wrong. But an onscreen graphic to boot? Ouch. So Manny and Long didn't actually get any offense here. I'll give you time to collect yourselves. Giant threw a nice corner clothesline, and (recurring theme!) a big powerslam. Cool spot where Manny was trying a single leg on Giant, Long flew in with a crossbody that got caught, Giant did a huge kneelift to Manny and then a fallaway slam on Long. This maybe went 90 seconds.

ER18: Manny and Butch have sorta matching tights. Were they going to be a regular team that ended up forgotten and lower on the totem pole than Disorderly Conduct? Sadly for Mr. Fernandez, the prematch graphic said he was Vern Henderson. Chris Cruise does him right during the match and calls him by his true name, but man that's gotta be frustrating to show up on TV and not even get to see your name. Giant shows off some cool stuff, a big powerslam, a great kneelift, throwing a guy like a basketball into the other's face, a fun throwback squash. Both guys were big enough that it looked extra impressive.

Men at Work vs. Brad Armstrong/Steve Armstrong

ER15: This was awesome. It's a fun example of WCW syndicated hierarchy, as there are still matches that surprise me with who's going over. I didn't see Norton going over One Man Gang, and here it was more of a toss-up. Armstrongs don't win a lot, neither do Men at Work. Armstrongs won this one, but ask yourself if the result wouldn't have been different if it were Scott and Steve instead of Brad and Steve. Steve/Scott seems like a team that could feasibly lose to Men at Work. But man this was good. Starr and Brad had glorious slicked down tightly curled mullets, you got a shit ton of dropkicks (and Brad is a guy with a great dropkick), Kanyon showed off a beautiful piece of underrated pro wrestling by nailing Brad with a big right hand coming out of an arm wringer (think about it, picture a guy doing an arm wringer, twisting up and under, only to be met with a right hand on the other side. You love it.), Steve continues the TREND by hitting a big rotating powerslam on Starr  (seriously, EVERYbody did a powerslam and it's the best), Kanyon predicts indie wrestling 15 years into the future by hitting a urunage onto his own knee, and that early match urunage leads to a great finish where Brad scouts it, reverses it later when Kanyon goes for it and slips right out the back into a dynamite Russian legsweep. This was just wonderful classic tag wrestling.

ER18: Armstrongs were so safe and wholesome and professional. They're working axe handle to arm spots, they're throwing armdrags and dropkicks, they're setting up miscommunication spots with Men at Work colliding on a rope running spot, and the white middle class fans are eating it all up! Steve hits this great high angle powerslam like he was Rick Steiner, but Kanyon drops a pitch perfect elbow drop across the back of Armstrong's head while he's pinning Starr. Seriously the perfect elbow. We get a nice long FIP section with Starr capturing Steve in a body vice and Kanyon dropping knees. We get a cutaway that makes Scott Armstrong look like a real weirdo: He's been out there the whole time at ringside, rooting for his boys, and wearing black windbreaker pants and a turquoise Universal Studios shirt tucking into them. And 3 minutes into the match we get a camera angle way from the back of the studio, a crane shot moving away from the action, the kind they use to get a look at the crowd...and all of the ring crew visible in the shot (camera man on the apron (a role that doesn't exist in modern TV wrestling), camera man on the floor, guy in charge of how much slack cable a camera operator needs)...are wearing the exact same thing as Scott Armstrong. They all got tucked in Universal Studios shirts, tucked into their black workout pants. Why did Scott Armstrong come out to ringside, wearing the exact same gear as the WCW ring crew? He could have worn anything. You don't want to be the guy wearing a red polo and khackis to Target. Did the Universal Studios security not believe Scott Armstrong was a wrestler so he had to sneak to ringside as a member of the ring crew? I'm so in the weeds on this clothing choice. Earlier in the match Steve Armstrong went for O'Connor roll and Kanyon broke it up by waiting for Starr to kick out, then hitting a uranage backbreaker on Armstrong. I thought it was dumb, as it was a bit too much of Kanyon's NOVA-ish side, but more that he was just assuming Starr would kick out. "I'm gonna hit this big innovative move once my partner kicks out of that plausible pinfall." BUT at the end of the match Brad gets an O'Connor roll on Starr, Starr kicks out, Kanyon grabs Brad in a uranage...and Brad reverses it to snap off a Russian leg sweep for the win. That move that I thought stood out as stupid, paid off in the end, and I left this match a happy man, other than the fact that I will never ever get an explanation for Scott Armstong's attire.

Lex Luger vs. Vern Henderson

ER15: Henderson is a fun old roided guy who pops up a couple times of year in WCW. He always tries, attempts offense he probably shouldn't, and takes at least one big bump a match. I always smile when Vern pops up. Luger is a little more controlling here than he was against Ice Train, but he still gives Vern a lot. Vern breaks out a neat little floatover armdrag that you wouldn't expect him to, and as advertised gets tossed to the floor and takes a big back bump without getting slowed down by the ropes. His punches are bad and Zbyszko calls out how awful his hammerlock is. "Luger must just be letting him put that thing on to be kind!" Luger hits a powerslam (THEME!) and runs nicely into Vern's corner boot. But then it's torture rack time. Fun little match. Luger was like Bill Dundee in terms of 1996 WCW studio taping mastery.

ER18: We get two straight weeks of Luger main events, and Vern Henderson gets his name graphic on two different matches AND a main event slot. Vern Henderson is having the best week ever! But then Dusty calls him Florence Henderson, and that good week window slams shut. Henderson is an older musclehead that I always end up liking, he bumps big for a guy who looks like he can't move his torso much, and he always tries new offense that he's probably too big for. Luger is way too generous in these matches but it's awesome, he gets a couple of early elbows and throws Henderson to the floor through the middle rope (with Vern taking a nice no hands bump to the floor), and the rest of the match he totally gives to Henderson. Henderson does this very slow but very awesome Tim Horner armdrag, rolling over Luger's back. He also hits a big flying back elbow that looked nice, all of this with Luger bumping all over for him. The only actual drawback to syndicated WCW is that the finishes can get lazy (which is a dumb statement coming right after the fun ending to the previous match). With the big stars you often get them showing ass until it's time to go home, and then just hitting their finisher. Macho Man obviously did this a lot, Flair not shockingly as well, and here Luger bumps all around for Vern until he just kicks him and gets him in the Torture Rack. Still, we got a fun match up until that bit of uninspiration.

Barbarian vs. Konnan

ER15: Woof. What a waste of Barbarian. Let me be the first person to talk about how awful a wrestler Konnan was. At this point he had been given the US title, yet still clearly had no idea how to take offense. He had no idea how to fall, and many times came off like a totally untrained wrestler. At one point Barbarian hits a lariat and Konnan puts his arms at his side and just tips over. Later he spun around twice before hitting a kick to the stomach. I can't actually figure out a way to type what he did, to properly convey how misguided it looked. Barbarian was in the ropes, Konnan right in front of him, in place, just spun around clockwise - twice - on his feet, and at the end of the second spin just threw his leg out, so it was like a sidekick to the stomach. Barbarian sold it properly, like a confused man who kind of got flicked in the nuts by a good friend. Just holding his stomach and looking up at Konnan, confused. Later Konnan has problems getting up on a powerbomb (didn't seem like he intentionally sandbagged Barb, just looked like he was clueless) so Barb muscled him up and planted him anyway. The finish is Klassic Klueless Konnan, as Barbarian goes for another powerbomb, Konnan is supposed to do a rana, but Konnan instead manages to completely brain himself, just awkwardly dropping right onto his own head and neck. Barb tries gallantly to roll through it, and Konnan ends up sitting on Barbarian's chest holding his own head for the pin. A true champion.

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Complete and Accurate WCW B-Sides

Syndicated WCW is my anytime mood brightener, my absolutely favorite wrestling to watch and absorb. Gassed up Power Plant guys, one off appearances, matches from guys you didn't know were under contract, theme park tourist fans in a rolling sea of white shirts, just the easiest to digest wrestling ever. This will cover the syndicated programming airing during the Nitro era, but I may expand that with no warning whatsoever.

WCW Worldwide

4/9/95
4/16/95
10/1/95
10/8/95
11/5/95
11/19/95
12/10/95

6/23/96
6/30/96
8/4/96
8/11/96
9/15/96
9/22/96
10/27/96
11/3/96

5/4/97
5/11/97
8/10/97
11/9/97
11/16/97

5/30/98
6/15/98
7/4/98
8/1/98
8/9/98
8/15/98
12/5/98
12/12/98
12/19/98

2/13/99
2/20/99
2/27/99
3/6/99
3/13/99
3/20/99
3/27/99
4/3/99
5/8/99
5/15/99
10/23/99
10/30/99
12/5/99

WCW Saturday Night

2/7/98
2/14/98
5/16/98
6/13/98
6/20/98
7/25/98
10/17/98

1/16/99
2/13/99
4/10/99
6/26/99
7/31/99
9/4/99
11/27/99

3/11/00 Pt. I   3/11/00 Pt. II

WCW Pro

3/23/96
3/30/96
4/6/96
4/13/96
6/15/96
6/22/96
8/10/96
8/17/96
8/24/96
8/31/96
9/7/96

WCW Main Event

6/23/96
7/7/96
7/14/96
7/21/96

5/24/97
5/31/97
9/6/97
9/13/97

WCW Nitro

10/21/96

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Rey and Psicosis are Playing MC's Like an Old Accordian

Rey Mysterio Jr. vs. Psicosis AAA 3/15/96 - GREAT

Cool hidden gem, as we get a handheld of a AAA spot show. With the hubris of youth both guys pretty much keep the pedal mashed down. We do get to see some matwork early, I especially liked Psicosis's reversal of a tapatia. Finish of the first fall was a little abrupt though as Psicosis just got done with the mat work, picked Rey up, hit a rana off the top, hung him in the ropes, legdropped him and tapped him with a sharpshooter, felt like they just wanted to move on. Otherwise the pacing in this match was good, we got a couple of big dives for a house show including a quebrada into some chairs, and a baseball slide headscissors. Really liked the finish of the tercera as Psicosis was rolling but just gets caught with a flash rana for the pin, really established Rey as a guy who can catch you out of nowhere.

Rey Mysterio Jr. vs. Psicosis WCW 7/27/96 - GREAT

These syndie matches between the two are just like popcorn, disposable, delicious and easy to binge on. This was relatively early in Rey's run, and this was pretty much a Rey showcase against maybe his best base ever. It is a trip to watch early feather light Rey, when you are used to current solid Rey. He moves so fast in this match and the timing of his headscissors are just great. We don't see anything super nuts, although he does hit a flipping senton on that weird elevated WCW Pro stage. Psic hits a couple of nice powerbombs, but is mostly there to make Rey look good.

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Lord Regal is Driving Your Girlfriend Home

Lord Steven Regal vs. 2 Cold Scorpio 7/27/93 - FUN

PAS: Kind of an odd match, it is a 10 minute time limit draw worked about 85% on the mat. That is right up Regal's alley, but it doesn't really work to the strengths of 93 2 Cold. Regal had some great looking stuff, but Scorpio's counters and hold work looked a little tentative. Also when 2 Cold finally flies, he hits a weak looking superfly splash. Regal did enough stuff to get it to FUN, but this on paper looked like a dream match, and instead it felt like Regal imposing himself on the match.

COMPLETE AND ACCURATE REGAL

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Regal Snuck Into My Room Just to Read My Diary

Lord Steven Regal vs. Dean Malenko 2/7/97 - GREAT

I remember thinking back in the 90s, that these were a pair of guys who weirdly didn't match up well with each other, but I thought this was pretty great (maybe this is an idea like Dave Matthews Band and Welfare Reform which needs to be left in the 90s). This opened with a mat section which was unsurprisingly great, Regal is just a master of doing cool little things in every match, and his maximalist approach mixes nicely with Malenko's minimalism. . Here Malenko puts him in a head scissors and he does all of the these neck manipulations and adjustments to get out. Later in the match Malenko hits a couple of back elbows and Regal adjusts his jaw like they knocked out a tooth. The match ended abruptly in a time limit draw without any real dramatic near falls which keeps this out of EPIC territory, but I need to track down the rest of their matches.

COMPLETE AND ACCURATE REGAL

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My Favorite Wrestling: WCW Pro 4/13/96

A request from the wonderful and dependable Cubs Fan, a mere hours before the most exciting baseball game of his last decade is about to commence (I'm pulling for the Cubs, buddy).


1. State Patrol vs. Fire & Ice

This was really fun, and according to Chris Cruise the debut of Fire & Ice!! Historic!! Parker is a guy who won't back down and he jumps Train and immediately stiffs him up. It doesn't last long as Train gives Buddy a massive backdrop and a lariat right into Parker's throat, then Norton tags in and steamrolls him with a shoulderblock. State Patrol get to double team him for a bit, choking him out on the ropes and clubbing him, until Norton does a cool double vertical suplex on them. Finish is Norton hitting his nasty shoulderbreaker on Parker followed up with a huge standing splash from Train. Really fun tag.

2. V.K. Wallstreet vs. Cobra

This was maybe the most offense I've ever seen Cobra get. He throws a nice dropkick, some decent-ish punches, threw a really nice high arc powerslam. A lot of guys threw pretty nice powerslams during this era WCW. But Cobra really was a guy who seemed green for several years. I once saw somebody selling a "Super J" comp tape from their tapelist. I assumed initially that it was some Super J Tourney Comp, but no, it was legitimately a Jeff Farmer comp, just during the time he went by Super J. That is probably the weirdest comp tape I've ever seen.

3. Giant vs. Butch Long & Not THEE Manny Fernandez

Manny Fernandez is announced as Vern Henderson here. I always feel for jobbers when they get their name announced wrong. But an onscreen graphic to boot? Ouch. So Manny and Long didn't actually get any offense here. I'll give you time to collect yourselves. Giant threw a nice corner clothesline, and (recurring theme!) a big powerslam. Cool spot where Manny was trying a single leg on Giant, Long flew in with a crossbody that got caught, Giant did a huge kneelift to Manny and then a fallaway slam on Long. This maybe went 90 seconds.

4. Men at Work vs. Brad & Steve Armstrong

This was awesome. It's a fun example of WCW syndicated hierarchy, as there are still matches that surprise me with who's going over. I didn't see Norton going over One Man Gang, and here it was more of a toss-up. Armstrongs don't win a lot, neither do Men at Work. Armstrongs won this one, but ask yourself if the result wouldn't have been different if it were Scott and Steve instead of Brad and Steve. Steve/Scott seems like a team that could feasibly lose to Men at Work. But man this was good. Starr and Brad had glorious slicked down tightly curled mullets, you got a shit ton of dropkicks (and Brad is a guy with a great dropkick), Kanyon showed off a beautiful piece of underrated pro wrestling by nailing Brad with a big right hand coming out of an arm wringer (think about it, picture a guy doing an arm wringer, twisting up and under, only to be met with a right hand on the other side. You love it.), Steve continues the TREND by hitting a big rotating powerslam on Starr  (seriously, EVERYbody did a powerslam and it's the best), Kanyon predicts indie wrestling 15 years into the future by hitting a urunage onto his own knee, and that early match urunage leads to a great finish where Brad scouts it, reverses it later when Kanyon goes for it and slips right out the back into a dynamite Russian legsweep. This was just wonderful classic tag wrestling.

5. Lex Luger vs. Vern Henderson

Henderson is a fun old roided guy who pops up a couple times of year in WCW. He always tries, attempts offense he probably shouldn't, and takes at least one big bump a match. I always smile when Vern pops up. Luger is a little more controlling here than he was against Ice Train, but he still gives Vern a lot. Vern breaks out a neat little floatover armdrag that you wouldn't expect him to, and as advertised gets tossed to the floor and takes a big back bump without getting slowed down by the ropes. His punches are bad and Zbyszko calls out how awful his hammerlock is. "Luger must just be letting him put that thing on to be kind!" Luger hits a powerslam (THEME!) and runs nicely into Vern's corner boot. But then it's torture rack time. Fun little match. Luger was like Bill Dundee in terms of 1996 WCW studio taping mastery.

6. Barbarian vs. Konnan

Woof. What a waste of Barbarian. Let me be the first person to talk about how awful a wrestler Konnan was. At this point he had been given the US title, yet still clearly had no idea how to take offense. He had no idea how to fall, and many times came off like a totally untrained wrestler. At one point Barbarian hits a lariat and Konnan puts his arms at his side and just tips over. Later he spun around twice before hitting a kick to the stomach. I can't actually figure out a way to type what he did, to properly convey how misguided it looked. Barbarian was in the ropes, Konnan right in front of him, in place, just spun around clockwise - twice - on his feet, and at the end of the second spin just threw his leg out, so it was like a sidekick to the stomach. Barbarian sold it properly, like a confused man who kind of got flicked in the nuts by a good friend. Just holding his stomach and looking up at Konnan, confused. Later Konnan has problems getting up on a powerbomb (didn't seem like he intentionally sandbagged Barb, just looked like he was clueless) so Barb muscled him up and planted him anyway. The finish is Klassic Klueless Konnan, as Barbarian goes for another powerbomb, Konnan is supposed to do a rana, but Konnan instead manages to completely brain himself, just awkwardly dropping right onto his own head and neck. Barb tries gallantly to roll through it, and Konnan ends up sitting on Barbarian's chest holding his own head for the pin. A true champion.


Have you had enough 1996 syndicated WCW, Cubs? Well there's gonna be more! After all, you were my first donor, gotta give the people what they want!


***I'm probably sounding like a skipping record (like my Metal Health LP that awesomely skips during the first chorus of "Cum on Feel the Noize", so it just gets stuck perfectly on Kevin DuBrow yelling "Mooore moooore moooore") at this point but I'm still trying to raise money for my friend and coworker whose home burned down, completely disappearing every single one of her possessions. The donations have slowed but no matter, I still have plenty of neat requests to fulfill and WILL be continuing to fulfill them! I'm matching EVERY contribution and will continue writing above and beyond for those who donate. You donate $1? That's awesome. Whatever you can do, and then you get to make a request. This means SO MUCH to me and you all are making me so happy***

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My Favorite Wrestling: WCW Pro 4/6/96

We continue down the CubsFan requested journey through some randomly selected 1996 WCW syndicated television.


1. The Barrio Bros. (Fidel Sierra & Ricky Santana) vs. Sgt. Craig Pittman & Jim Duggan

I have no memory of Sierra and Santana actually being called "Fidel Barrio and Ricky Barrio". I mean I have no memory of Ricky Santana in WCW, let alone as Ricky Barrio. And this was not good.   Sierra leaned out of all of Duggan's clotheslines (which were not thrown with much authority anyway), and then Pittman/Duggan just worked arm wringers on Sierra for what felt like 3 minutes. This has a classic WCW syndicated finish. The call to go home happens right at the 4 minute mark, except only the ref and Duggan know about it, so Santana breaks up the pin at the 2 count and Nick Patrick just calls for the bell anyway. This really seems like it happens every few shows. I mean Santana literally pulled Duggan by the leg off of Sierra, and Patrick didn't even count the 3, just called for the bell after 2. Usually it seems to happen in Konnan matches.

2. Scott Norton vs. One Man Gang

I had no idea these two ever matched up, and right when Gang came out I realized it was a match I REALLY wanted to see without having ever thought about it existing before. Like, Norton walked out and I was like "oh okay, a Norton singles match. Didn't realize he was getting singles matches this early in WCW." and then Gang came out and I was like "I WANT TO SEE THIS SO BAD!!!" I had no idea Gang was still working WCW at this point. The Konnan US Title loss was a few months before, and I don't remember much of him after that. So was surprised to see him pop up here. And it was awesome. BUT only 3 minutes long. Heartbreaking. But these 3 minutes are really good with both men working stiff with big clubbing blows and punches. Gang towers over Norton here which shocked me. I mean Gang looked enormous here, a good 6" over Norton. Rachel, not knowing the size of these two relative to others, thought Gang was Big Show size. Really carried himself like a giant, but worked really quick here. He took a huge bump off a Norton lariat, hit a super fast avalanche in the corner, really able to both bully Norton around while also look vulnerable. Norton will never have a problem clubbing a dude, and the match-ending powerslam he hits on Gang was epic. Picture Norton doing his normal fast high arc powerslam, but to a guy as large as Gang. Crazy finish. Two more minutes, shoot probably even one more minute and this would be a great find. As it is, it's wonderful, and they cram a lot of stiff action into three minutes, but just needed a *bit* more.

3. Men at Work vs. Public Enemy

Boy there were a lot of Public Enemy tags on syndicated WCW TV. Many of them not good. This one? This one totally worked. PE just throw out nothing but clotheslines, and Mark Starr and Kanyon bump all over the place for the clotheslines. Men at Work would gain a minor advantage, stop and mockingly do the PE dance for all the white-shirted losers, and then PE would hit another clothesline. Clotheslines all around! Sometimes double clotheslines! There were no less than 13 clotheslines in this match. Clothesline, flat back bump. Then Rocco hit the asai moonsault on both guys, and put it away with the Drive-By. There must have been some kind of in-joke here. Or, Grunge and Rock just wanted to throw all of the clotheslines, and Men at Work had no problem with that. Men at Work did throw a nice double elbow drop at one point. Whatever, this all worked for me. Most of these guys are dead now.

4. Shark vs. Pez Whatley

Tenta...doesn't give Pez a whole lot here. There's a good leapfrog segment that allows Pez to show off his hops, Tenta crushes him with a nice elbow, hits a real nice falling slam, steps on him a bunch. After Shark gets the never-in-doubt win, Chris Cruise says "Well...it would appear...that maybe Pez Whatley never had a chance." It would appear so.

5. Ice Train vs. Lex Luger

So before you know what happens in this match, let me ask you how you would have guessed this match going. I would have guessed "test of strength, couple of shoulderblocks where neither man goes down, Ice Train gets a miniscule advantage, Luger calls for it to go home out of nowhere 2 minutes in." That sounds like exactly what you were picturing, right? Don't act like you expected this - what actually happened:

The match went almost 10 minutes, Luger gave Ice Train practically the WHOLE match, Ice Train won by DQ when Jimmy Hart attacked him with the megaphone, then Luger got punked out by Norton and Train after the match. Seriously. That's what happened. Luger stooged for Train the whole match. Train worked over Luger's arm and Luger put it over huge, sold his left arm, clutching it to his side, even setting up runs for Ice Train by doing things like missing a corner charge with his bad shoulder/arm. He gives Train everything. He even puts over Train's strength by going for a pinfall and then comically launching himself off of Train on the kickoff. And Ice Train really really really does not make the most of this gift. He looks so bad throughout so much of this. His punches are just impossibly bad. His arm work and Fujiwara armbar are surprisingly good, even tossing out a legdrop to Luger's wing at one point. But then he went and hit the worst drop toe hold I've ever seen. Luger didn't know what it was supposed to be. None of the announcers had any idea what it was supposed to be.

Actual exchange after the alleged drop toe hold:

Chris Cruise: Well I...believe that may have been some...maybe a drop toe hold?
Larry Z: Well we might never know unless we get...Quincy on the case.
Cruise: Quincy!?
Dusty: Quincy!! Quincy hasn't been on the air in 10 years!
Cruise: Maybe 20!
Larry Z: Look...with 80 cable channels you can find anything...
Dusty: Quincy Adams! Quincy Jones!
Larry Z: You know what...

Norton runs in after the interference, Luger clubs him and Norton completely no sells it, then Luger BEGS OFF!

I mean, this was awesome. Luger just totally stooged the whole time for a guy who really didn't deserve it. 1996 Luger has been just so consistently good.


***I'm still desperately trying to raise money for my friend and coworker whose home burned down. The donations are coming in and the requests are getting weirder and I fear they're going to start purposely torturing me. BUT NO MATTER! I'm matching every contribution and will continue writing above and beyond for those who donate. This means a lot to me and you all are making me so happy***

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My Favorite Wrestling! WCW Pro 9/7/96

This show is being billed as a huge deal because it's the long-anticipated debut of GLACIER!! I cannot believe that people had to sit through months and months of hype vids for Glacier, and WCW debuts him on what has to be their weakest show. Were they just petrified of him botching a match on live television? Why couldn't they have at least debuted him on a Saturday Night ep? Or debut him on the next week's Pro, which was at least right before the Fall Brawl ppv. Anybody have any clue why they hyped his debut for so damn long and then just threw it out on the Pro?

1. Scott Armstrong vs. Alex Wright

Battle of a couple 2nd generation workers! But sadly this doesn't get the chance to stretch out as they seem to be held to a pretty strict 3 minute rule. Nothing at all inoffensive about this match, but this felt like a pretty standard house show run of start with some mat stuff, go into some exchanges, one guy gets advantage, other guy transitions to advantage, first guy gets win without ever really transitioning back. Here Armstrong got the knees up on Wright's little slingshot corner splash, but Wright basically just went to his German suplex moments later to end it.

2. Craig Pittman vs. Terry Davis

Terry Davis used to pop up as a jobber all the time on WWF TV when I was a kid. The guy looks like a baby faced Luke Gallows, with no facial hair and horseshoe haircut and the most unflattering singlet/tights combo you've ever seen. This was one of those awesome Pittman matches where he was basically working with a mannequin. Davis got no offense, never attempted offense, he was just like a life-sized wrestling buddy who you could try moves on. And that's what Pittman does. You get the sense from watching some of these Pittman matches that he makes up most of these moves on the fly, and it gives the moves a sense of originality.  At one point he takes Davis up into a torture rack and drops him into an atomic drop. Most of the time I got the sense that Davis was dead weight (or again, not sure at all what move Pittman was doing) so Pittman would just dead lift him and then slam him. At one point Pittman locked on a rad liontamer where he crossed Davis' legs. And I love Pittman's battering ram headbutt finisher. I'm genuinely starting to look forward to Pittman matches. This guy was the great lost worked shoot fighter of the 90s.

3. Big Ron Studd vs. Chris Benoit

Boy the only way you can describe this is "mismatch". Ron Reis is gigantic, and also not good at pro wrestling. Match still has a couple decent Oh Shit moments, like Benoit hitting a massive German on Reis, and then Benoit finishing with an enormous superplex (which is pretty stupid since Reis went to the top rope to get into position for it, and there's zero chance the guy was going to be doing ANY sort of offense off the top, but whatevs) that Reis baaaarely gets over for and practically spikes himself. Jeez. Benoit gets the pin and then stomps Reis' head after the pinfall which Reis clearly was not expecting.

4. Brad Armstrong vs. Dean Malenko

Cool short match ruined by the stupid, rushed finish. Both guys work super quick armdrag exchanges and the fans are jacked, Larry talks the whole match about the "Armstrong curse", and Brad gets to take like 80% of this. I'm into it, fans are into it, things are looking good. Then Brad hits the Russian leg sweep and instead of going for the pin instantly goes up top. So Malenko gets up from Brad's finisher after being on the mat only 2 seconds, as he has to be up in time to catch Armstrong. Armstrong hits a full impact crossbody off the top, Dean even did that bump where he jumps into the crossbody to take a huge back bump from it with Armstrong splatting right on top of him........and then Dean just rolls him over and pins him. What. The. Fuck. So Dean takes Armstrong's finisher, takes a massive crossbody off the top...and then just wins. I get that he was supposed to roll through the crossbody and use Armstrong's momentum against him, but then you'd think he'd take more of a rolling bump instead of a SPLAT back bump. Just garbage.

5. Glacier vs. The Gambler

So it has to be said that Gambler looks AMAZING here. Usually he comes out in just a satin little league coaches' jacket with "The Gambler" stitched into the back over a deck of playing cards. You know the jacket, because you wanted that jacket. But HERE he comes out decked to the nines as a riverboat gambler and it is INCREDIBLE. I have never seen him decked like this and here he full-on out-Robert Parkers Robert Parker! He's got a white button up ruffled shirt (tucked into his trunks), suspenders, pocket watch, black coat with tails, and dressed bowler hat. Amazing. The guy is doing card tricks on the way to the ring, has a cocky swagger and looks like an actual big deal. I love the Gambler. And I cannot imagine anybody else running into Glacier offense better than Gambler did here. All of the spots came off without a hitch and a lot of the set-up was fairly complicated. It would have been VERY easy for somebody to get lost along the way (though there was no doubt tons of rehearsal put into this), but Gambler made it. He sold all of Glacier's ridiculous 5 fingers of death strikes appropriately, ran into kicks like he was supposed to, and looked downright pro. Bowler hats off to The Gambler. I wish that guy had a job in wrestling today. Any clue what he is up to at all? For a guy who was a part of a major promotion for 5 years, I haven't heard anything about him in ages. Guys less famous than him have done shoot interviews.

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My Favorite Wrestling! WCW Pro 8/31/96

1. Hugh Morrus vs. Johnny Boone

Man Morrus squash matches are just the worst. I haven't seen a good one yet. Half the moves miss and just look bad and he always looks really awkward and makes weird faces and stands around all clenched-butt. I actually don't remember Boone as a worker (just as a referee) but here he's pretty game and flies into turnbuckles and has awesome tassle tights and holy shit literally 90% of the crowd is wearing white t-shirts. How is this something I did not notice until like a week ago. When I think of 90s clothing I think of neon and shit, but the gear of the 90s was clearly white t-shirts a few sizes too large, with or without logo. It all makes so much sense now.

2. Scott & Steve Armstrong vs. Public Enemy

This was pretty cool as we had a face Armstrongs team vs. a heel PE team. I actually didn't realize PE had worked WCW as heels at any point. And really, their schtick works much better with them as heels. Instead of doing a goofy dance with a bunch of tourists, the dance instead took on an act of mockery. Hit a move, do the Cabbage Patch, get boos. That's really how it should be as PE are grown men wearing children's clothing ensembles. And I really like heel Public Enemy. They don't have much offense that looks good (although I like Rocco's elbow drop) so them cutting off the ring and working over the Armstrongs with simple punches, holds and stomps works better for them. And the Armstrongs are a great team at getting the crowd hyped for some hot tags. Great table fake early in the match where I thought the Armstrongs were toast, only for Steve to trip up Rocco to make an early comeback. End run was pretty hot as the PE get crossed up and I completely bought that Scott was going to get the win with a roll-up. Armstrongs don't really win matches though, but I was able to buy in. That means that this works, baby. What's crazy is this gets a little over TEN MINUTES which if you had told me prior to viewing that this episode had a 10 minute plus PE match, I would not have been enthused. But this was grade A tag teaming baby!

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My Favorite Wrestling! WCW Pro 8/24/96

Good grief Larry is wearing an absurd button up tie dye shirt and really seems like he's attempting to look worse than any number of crowd members wearing t-shirts with Taz dunking a basketball. I'm also convinced that t-shirts were only made in color "white" during most of the 90s. Thinking back to all of my No Fear shirts when I was in 7th grade and those were all white. This is just a whole crowd of white shirted people in weird fitting pants. You can't see much detail, but I'm assuming there were at least 7 Big Johnson shirts in this crowd.

1. Mike Enos vs. Chad Brock

Shit yeah this sounds fun on paper, and it really was a fantastic Enos showcase. Not only does Enos tear into Brock but he also makes Brock's sub-par stomach kicks look good. Enos shows ass for Brock and misses a giant elbow drop. Enos also hits an insane standing overhead belly to belly which is really impressive since Brock isn't a tiny guy. Enos' strikes look great and he came off like an absolute mauler here.

2. Faces of Fear vs. Chip Minton/Billy Payne

You know what? I'm calling bullshit on the monster Meng. This dude was the Bruiser Brody of the 90s. Everybody has heard so many stories about Meng biting peoples' noses off and bar fights and Finlay backstage staredowns and they just think this guy is thee fucking shooter. But you know what? Meng usually looks like dog shit in the ring. His strikes usually look like garbage and he rarely stiffs up jobbers. Billy Payne had a jheri curl mohawk and a horrible singlet. Nobody deserved a stiff beating more than this guy. And it just didn't happen. Barbarian worked Payne's ass over something fierce. Booted his face, threw some crazy stiff chops. Meng just makes goofy faces and locks on his death grip. He does hit a stiff atomic drop on Chip Minton, but that seemed more like Minton getting his trademark crazy height on moves and launching himself balls first into Meng's knee. So that's it, this is the moment where I no longer get excited for Meng vs. jobber matches. The guy was just too much of a lovable teddy bear to hurt poor little jobbers. All rep no actual video to back it up. Yeah, it was amazing that one time he speared the cardboard cutout of Goldberg, but I need some nose biting or finger breaking before I come back on board.

3. Chavo Guerrero Jr. vs. Rey Misterio Jr.

According to Chris Cruise this is the first time these two have met, and that's pretty damn cool if true (and it's not unbelievable as I don't think Chavo really worked anywhere before WCW. If he did then I've never seen it). Rey takes a lunatic monkey flip bump that lands him into the ropes and he and Eddy are like the only guys I've seen do that spot regularly and it just seems super dangerous. Rey recovers and sends Chavo to the floor, and hits a somersault senton and just splats butt first into Chavo and Chavo lands with a brutal thud onto the unforgiving rotating platform that the Pro ring is placed on. And Rey comes up limping and holding his knee. Hmmmm. I mean, knowing what I know now it's not a stretch to think that Rey's knees were already feeling like a bag of potato chips that had been stomped on, but we'll see how this plays out. Back in and Chavo starts wrenching and elbow dropping the knee so thank god. Makes me just think that Dean was missing physical cues in that other match, but...naw I have no clue what happened in that match. And HOLY FUCK Chavo hits a plancha to the floor and Rey absorbs it halfway on the stage and half off and they splat right onto the edge of that stupid ass stage set up and Rey has those 2009 Misawa "awwww fuck that hurt" eyes going on. Back in and Chavo hits a beautiful moonsault press just like his daddy, but misses a springboard crossbody and Rey pins him. Chris Cruise says that was impressive because Rey showed that he can hang on the mat as opposed to just aerial attacks, but Rey literally did nothing whatsoever on the mat in this match. Still, match was plenty fun.

4. DDP vs. Craig Pittman

Well...that was an 8 minute DDP/Craig Pittman match. About 3 minutes of this was DDP holding a chinlock, building to him getting caught with his feet on the ropes. So that whole gag happened. Pittman is a real odd duck as sometimes he looks really cool in the ring and other times his style just does not mesh and he moves really clunky. Like here. DDP will bump big for an old man and Pittman ate a clothesline real nice and took the Diamond Cutter on the floor but...this just didn't work out.

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My Favorite Wrestling! WCW Pro 8/17/96

1. Chip Minton vs. Diamond Dallas Page

This wasn't much and I'm kinda shocked that WCW never tried to push Minton at all. I mean, how often does an actual US Olympian get into pro wrestling? He was pretty raw but had some obvious talent. Instead we get a bunch of Larry Z griping about how bobsledding won't make him a better wrestler and acting as if Minton was leading a bobsledding invasion against WCW wrestling.

2. Jim Powers vs. The Gambler

Alright, I'll be honest with you: Jim Powers is not very good at pro wrestling. But what's even worse is that he's not very good in a completely boring way. He does hip tosses. He rams guys' heads into the turnbuckles. He throws a super light dropkick. He has just nothing going for him at all. You can't laugh at him for being horrible, your brain just goes blank for 4 minutes. So thank god for The Gambler, who tries his damndest to have a fun match with Jim Powers. He doesn't succeed, but he tried. This was at least notable for being one of the few matches where The Gambler controlled the match and took most of the offense. Powers was working comebacks most of the way through so Gambler got to control with Arn Anderson-meets-Chris Elliott charm. I wish actual good wrestlers would try and work a competitive match with him.

3. High Voltage vs. American Males

Hey, you know who used to be good? Marcus Bagwell. I really liked him in this, working the hot tag for Riggs. He had a really nice dropkick, cool shoulderblock and a great crossbody off the top for the win, and this was an enjoyable 7 minute tag. You know who wasn't good back then? Kaos (or "Chaos" as it was spelled here). He was just totally lost and it was a testament to how decent Bagwell was that this thing didn't fall completely apart. Kaos was totally baffled by rope running spots and got way confused during all those exchanges.

***Baseball Rambling Below***

So all through this show they've been showing an ad for an old Sega Genesis baseball game (World Series Baseball 2?) and what so odd about the commercial is Brad Radke is the guy they used as the sports star hawking the game. Now Brad Radke was one of my favorite non-Giant ballplayers of all time. He was a small market guy who played his whole career on the Twins and retired when he wanted to, while he was still a relevant player. What made me really like him was his numbers always looked worse than they actually were, and he regularly got overlooked as a really good player because of that (Matt Cain would later hold many of these traits Radke held, and Cain is one of my all-time favorites. What made me love him so early on was it felt like the Giants finally had their own Radke). I mean, in the last couple seasons before he retired, Radke had a 5+ K/BB ratio. That's great. But this was not later career Radke being featured in a commercial. 1996 was only his 2nd year, and what was notable about his first couple seasons was that he gave up more HR than any other pitcher in MLB over those 2 years, giving up 32 in '95 as a rookie and 40 in '96. His rookie year ERA was 5.32 (5.42 FIP, oooof). And this commercial was amazing because Radke was in it for just that reason: he gave up home runs. The commercial showed him giving up bombs and painted him as a bad luck loser. For a 23 year old player to make fun of himself like that just made me love Radke that much more, and even more awesome that he averaged 5 WAR over the next 5 seasons after this commercial. So not only did Radke make fun of himself, but he had the last laugh. Awesome.

***Baseball Rambling Over***

4. Scott Flash vs. Mark Starr

This could have been a really good jobber match, but Norton just absolutely refused to sell anything that Mark Starr throws. It was real bad. He just walked through punches and kicks and made it pretty clear that Starr was a doofus. It did show just how decent Starr's punches were, when they can look good even when somebody doesn't acknowledge them. Norton was a beast here, so I get it. But I felt bad for Starr. Norton's shoulderbreaker is a vicious, reckless move that looks insanely painful.

5. Chris Benoit vs. Joe Gomez

Jim Powers, why can't you be as hilariously awful as Joe Gomez? Gomez was just awful. Hilariously awful. Even Rachel noticed how often he tossed his hair back while horribly executing basic offense (did BJ Whitmer watch a lot of Gomez when he was younger?). Here he does an insanely slow backslide set-up, stopping midway to whip his hair back TWICE. By far the best part of the match was Gomez missing a running crossbody block off the ropes. What made it so great was the fact that Gomez clearly did not know he was missing the crossbody. This is what a missed crossbody looks like when Joe Gomez clearly thinks he's going to be crashing into Chris Benoit. But Benoit ducked, and Gomez flew hilariously/dangerously/awesomely into the ropes, and then rolled to the floor. It was spectacular. Later in the match Gomez goes up to the top and it looks like he's climbing ropes for the first time right here and now in front of the world. Every step up looks super shaky and he has to stop on each rope to regain his balance. Yes, he did not even climb up on the buckles, he climbed up on the ropes right next to the buckles. When he finally disastrously gets to the top, he leaps off with the worst top rope splash I've seen, coming in way forward heavy, like he was attempting to do the Worm by first leaping off the top. He just flops there hilariously, and then lies there on his face, a total failure pile. Even better, Benoit just kinda lets him lie there for awhile, face down, until casually walking over and putting on the crossface. Thank you, Joe Gomez.

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My Favorite Wrestling! WCW Pro 8/10/96

8/10/96

1. Kurasawa vs. Jim Duggan

These vacationing Florida fans were going hog wild for Hacksaw (you see this show was the show right before WCW's Hog Wild PPV so what I did there was a little play on words). There was one woman in the crowd who was waving her hat around during his entrance who very clearly said, "Wave that flag, Hacksaw! Wave that flag!" I...kinda like the match for the first minute or so. Kurasawa muscles Hacksaw into the corner and laces into him, and that's kinda how it goes until Duggan decides it's over, reaches into the trunks for some tape, wraps his fist and wins with the taped fist punch. Dusty's gigantic red leather blazer looks like something out of Suze Orman's nightmares.

2. Eddie Guerrero vs. (not THEE) Manny Fernandez

Manny is kind of your 1996 jobber doofus, who always breaks out new offense in every match, but none of it is done very well so it just comes off hilariously inept. Here he busts out a northern lights suplex and a goofy double leg drop (springing off the bottom rope but still holding onto the top rope when he lands. Durp.). He's not good, he's not really awful, he's just not...THEE Manny Fernandez. Eddie slaps fives on the way to the ring and two white girls noticeably shrug away from him in horror. Eddie doesn't get much here before the finish but does throw some amazing corner punches which are some of the absolute hardest punches to make look good. Here he snaps them off right into Manny's neck. Froggy splash looks pretty and Dusty always squeals with glee when he gets to say "froggy".

3. Squire Dave Taylor vs. The Gambler

Holy lord this is like a WCW B-Sides dream match for me. There's no way it can live up to the hype I've already created for it in my brain's fantasy booking chamber. And it doesn't, although it's just about the most fun 2 minutes you could hope for. Gambler starts off with a hip toss and then a running back elbow, which Taylor takes a massive bump over the top to the floor for. Gambler chases him, and from there to the end Taylor beats the shit out of him. 5 nasty European uppercuts, a great yakuza kick to the side of Gambler's head, and finishes with Taylor's unreal fallaway slam which is arguably a top 5 finisher of this period, maybe ever. He holds guys up like he's gonna hit a simple bodyslam, and then just flips back into a float over/overhead suplex. Looks totally nasty and must take freakish strength to pull off. It's like a Spanish Fly variation on the fallaway slam. Taylor is so awesome.

4. Dean Malenko vs. Rey Misterio Jr.

This gets a full 11 minutes and starts off completely awesome, with Malenko keeping Rey in place with some nasty elbows in the corner (don't actually remember Malenko working this stiff), taking him down with a GREAT single leg and wrenching him around with a knucklelock. By the time he ran through Rey with a stiff clothesline (with Rey bumping lightning fast onto the back of his head), I was hooked. This didn't look like two guys remembering sequences, it looked like a competitive fight. What made that single leg so great is that it actually looked like Rey didn't want to go down, and Dean was actually taking him down. There was none of that far-off look certain wrestlers get where it looks like they're just thinking about the next spot, it looked like two guys making things look believable to fanny-pack sporting tourists (the only venue in all of wrestling where the fans wearing fanny packs outnumber the wrestlers wearing them).

And then around the 3 1/2 minute mark it just gets...not good. Rey appears to hurt his knee, so Malenko begins to work over every other body part except for Rey's knee, and it comes off really odd. Malenko locks on a Fujiwara armbar, Rey holds his knee. Dean hits a brainbuster (sick brainbuster, for the record), and Rey comes up holding his knee. At this point we go into some very long body scissor portions with Dean wrenching Rey's neck...which Rey comes out of holding his knee. But Rey's knee selling comes off far too campy for me to believe it, as he strongly limps around as if he's wearing only one platform shoe. He still hits high dropkicks and hits a springboard dropkick and beautiful springboard rana flawlessly, and also lands off the top rope onto his feet without his leg buckling at all.

So...if Rey was working an injury for 9 minutes of this match...why didn't Dean attack the leg at any point? It's very surreal to see a guy get his neck cranked on and then not act like his neck is hurt in the slightest but instead act like he can barely walk...until the moment of the match where he gets all his offense in and is suddenly fine again. I've seen countless matches where selling is ignored when a guy has to get his stuff in, and whatever. But I don't think I've ever seen a match where a guy sells a different body part from the ones being worked over, and then ignore his own fake injury.

Finish is a real dud here too as it was supposed to be Rey rolling through a samoan drop and getting the roll-up win, but instead Dean fucking PLANTS him with a samoan drop...and then Rey just rolls him over for the pin. In theory I assume it was supposed to look like Austin Aries' old samoan drop slam, but it just looked like Rey took a move, no sold it and instantly got the pin. Blech.

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My Favorite Wrestling: WCW Pro 3/23/96

WCW Pro 3/23/96:

1. Joey Maggs vs. Lex Luger

So people bagging on Luger officially needs to stop. Dude was damn good as late as '97. He looked real good here and bumped around for fucking Joey Maggs, who doesn't actually jump as often as his name would have you believe. Luger worked this match 50/50 and it was weird for everybody.

2. Ice Train vs. The Gambler

Boy Ice Train was not very good. Here he blows a couple hip tosses and botches a shoulderblock. Gambler, however, was great, as The Gambler always is. His sateen little league coach jacket always looks primo, and he always gets his gimmick of being a gambler over pre-match, whether it be holding a deck of cards, or throwing dice like he did here. The problem here was that the cameras didn't do a good job of showing the dice before he starting rolling, so it looked like he was uncomfortably miming jacking off while looking straight into the camera. This went on for too many seconds before the big dice reveal (he rolled a 3). His character feels like something that would really work today, in one of those "ripped from the headlines" type deals. He could lose all his money in some sort of Bernie Madoff scam, or lose his home in a subprime lending scenario.

There's a man in the crowd with a tucked in Dolphins jersey who clearly has no idea how to boo while giving the double thumbs down. It's like he's doing a weird combo of "revving a motorcycle" miming, and "crying baby with fists balled into eyes". His buddies all walk that line of a) wrestling fan or b) developmentally disabled...or c) developmentally disabled wrestling fan (it's almost always C).

3. Kurasawa vs. Randy Savage

Best part about this was Savage has Hogan at ringside holding a chair, cheating for him the whole match. Savage needed Hogan's interference to beat Kurasawa. All the while they're building up Hogan and Savage about to face 6 dudes in a cage at Uncensored, but Hogan helps Savage beat Kurasawa.

4. Konnan vs. Kanyon

Boy Kanyon will bump fantastically to put over crummy Konnan offense. Kanyon takes no fewer than two moves onto his head here, including the finish DDT which Kanyon plants himself on gorgeously.

5. Meng vs. Hulk Hogan

I actually like this match-up and it is hilarious how much Hogan cheats like a motherfucker through this whole match. Not one move he does is legit or done after being provoked. Right out of the gate he's biting Meng on the forehead, arm, leg, backraking him, choking him on the mat, hitting him with a chair, all while the announcers are putting him over. But then Meng does all that shit back to him and Dusty says like only Dusty can "Well he kinda had that comin to him." I don't want to see Meng job to the legdrop and luckily Zeus and the Ultimate Solution run out and Rachel is like "That guy from the Ice Cube Coors Light commercial did wrestling?!" and Savage wisely pulls a chairshot instead of hitting Meng as hard as he could in the face, because Meng would have bit his nose off backstage.

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