My Favorite Wrestling: WCW Saturday Night 6/26/99

Dave Burkhead vs. Van Hammer

God bless him, Burkhead and his "buff guy that got fat" body tried his damndest here, but Van Hammer. But, Van Hammer. A lot of men have tried, but, in the end, Van Hammer.

Al Greene vs. Barbarian

OK, this episode ain't starting off too hot. WCW had an odd habit of booking Al Green as a heel, then putting him against other heels. I like the Barbarian a lot, but he didn't look great here and Al Green looked better than I remember him being. TomK had a good story about a diner he goes to in New Orleans that has a wall of autographed celebrity photos, people like John Larroquette, James Gandolfini, Willard Scott...and Al Greene. I've always wondered where those pictures come from. Do the celebrities carry them around with them and hand them out to the restaurant when the owner asks? Or does the owner just have a large number of 8x10s of guys like The Dog Al Greene? I once was at the bad mall in my town, and saw Willie Nelson walking around. I went up to him and quickly found out it was NOT Willie Nelson, but it was Almost Willie, the world's #1 Willie Nelson impersonator. He had a bunch of 8x10s in his bag and signed one for me. So does The Dog Al Greene just carry a bunch of 8x10s around with him?

La Parka vs. Kenny Kaos

Well this was just too much fun, with Parka taking some crazy bumps for a bunch of Kaos clotheslines and actually getting in a whole bunch of offense (including punching Kaos right in the face a couple times). It's been beaten to death by everybody by now, but WCW really just did not know what they had with La Parka. Crowd is crazy hot for the guy in this match. He could have made them a whole bank full of money. Shoot, here we are 12 years after this episode aired and Park is currently my favorite wrestler in the world. Weird.

Barry Windham vs. Rey Misterio Jr.

Jeez, Barry Windham's SUUUUPER tight and SUUUUUPER short jean shorts are the most disgustingly distracting piece of wrestling attire I've ever seen. I would rather seen him in (technically smaller) trunks, as these awful denim shorts just looked like the most uncomfortably ball-strangling piece of clothing possible. Every time he moved or shifted I kept expecting a testicle to rupture. His whole outfit is completely preposterous, with the nut-strangling short-shorts (they were so short the pockets were sticking out the bottom!), cowboy boots, giant knee brace, tank top, and gardening gloves. WTF? Match was fun but ends prematurely as Kendall just runs in and starts beating Rey down, leading to K-Dawwwwg, Swoll, Chase Tatum all running down and getting their swell on and just kinda....looking like shitheads.

Bobby Blaze/Lenny Lane vs. Curt Hennig/Bobby Duncum Jr.

Hennig/Duncum were almost as awesome as the Kendall/Barry Rednecks duo. They just tore Lenny and Blaze apart. Duncum was decent in the ring, but his strengths appear to be his work outside the ring. His distraction spots from the floor or apron were done really great, and he does a bunch of cool stuff (stuff that seems to just not exist in modern wrestling) from the apron to keep the babyface on their toes (grabbing at them when they get close, yelling threats, being awesome). West Texas Rednecks stuff has really aged the best out of all the '99 WCW stuff.

Great exchange from Hudson/Tenay during the 2nd West Texas Rednecks match:

MT: You know, Larry Zbyszko loves this song [Rap is Crap]!
SH: Really? I wouldn't think Larry would listen to anything made past 1912.
MT: Well he told me during Thunder last week that his favorite music is Bob Seger!
SH: Larry Zbyszko loves Bob Seger!?
MT: Yep, BIG rock and roll fan. You'll have to start watching the Thunder broadcasts more often!
SH: Now why would I want to do that!?