WCW Nitro 12/30/96

1. The Amazing French Canadians vs. Public Enemy

ER: This had some odd uses of time, with the Canadians giving us the whole interrupted off-time National Anthem bit, and Public Enemy taking forever to get into the ring, really hitting every side of the ring to see how many people in Knoxville are waving their hands in the air. When they're wrestling, it's an amusing match. There are fun sloppy punch outs and an old lady in the front row giving advice and encouragement to PE. Both Canadians take nice backdrops (Carl went higher) after a fun punch out, but then get kept on the floor for while PE block the ropes for nearly a third of the match. Rougeau is great at getting himself on a table for PE, something hardly anyone does well. Jacques moves so Rocco Rock puts Grunge through a table with a Drive-By, and then the Canadians win in-ring with their own top rope assisted senton. I don't know what they call drive-bys in Canada, but it's probably got something to do with kicking at someone while riding a black horse. 

2. Jushin Thunder Liger vs. Ultimo Dragon

ER: These two were the big cruiserweight winners at Starrcade the night before, each getting a long time in their matches to build whatever they wanted. Here they didn't even get a third of the time they got at Starrcade, and the match felt disjointed and incomplete because of it. Dragon's strikes all looked very light, and his timing was off on his tilt-a-whirls. Liger had a lot of crisp stuff, like a nice cartwheel tope en reversa and follow up rolling senton, and a hard powerbomb (that was far more respectful than any of his powerbombs to Rey the night before). Dragon can be really lazy about how he sells opponent offense and sets up his own offense, like when he hits a light body slam and nothing else to set up a big missed top rope splash (a move I've never seen him do unless he catches boots on the landing). I did like Dragon using Liger as a jungle gym, scrambling all over him in the corner to hit a nice frankensteiner, and the tiger suplex follow up looked painful while also surprising for the finish. It seems crazy to me to have Liger win a long dominant match against Rey, only to turn around and have Ultimo Dragon take some offense until it was his turn. Things feel wrapped up too neatly and too feebly. 

3. Strap Match: Konnan vs. Michael Wallstreet

ER: This was supposed to be Konnan vs. Big Bubba, which sounds better on paper than Konnan vs. Wallstreet. Wallstreet issues a threat on Bubba's behalf before cheapshotting Konnan with a strap. Believe it or not WCW didn't run many strap matches in their existence, only a dozen or so (and half of those were Sting/Vader). But somehow one of the strap matches they chose to run was a Michael Wallstreet match, all 2.5 minutes of it. Wallstreet whips Konnan, takes a long journey to climb the ropes only to jump off into Konnan's boot, and then Konnan whips Wallstreet. Even with this match being under 3 minutes, they still managed to give us the most common strap match finish, taking up a huge portion of the match with it, and the second any viewer saw Konnan tag the turnbuckle immediately after Wallstreet tagged his first buckle they should have know where this was heading. 

4. Hugh Morrus vs. Kensuke Sasaki

ER: At minimum, this was a couple of guys who had no problem hitting hard and not backing down. They didn't take that as far as they could have, and the finish was as weak as can be, but it's fun to see Kensuke Sasaki hit Hugh Morrus as hard as he can while Morrus acts like none of it phases him. There are hard hitting shoulderblocks, lots of kicks to the stomach, and fast clubs to the back. Sasaki throws whistling chops, Morrus rakes the eyes and throws mediocre punches, makes hard impact on his clotheslines and hits a pretty unforgiving avalanche. Sasaki hits how own just-as-hard lariat, a big powerslam, and his over the shoulder rolling arm drag. The finish is incredibly lazy and one that WCW went to a lot, where someone with a top rope finisher would just take a lot of offense, then hit one singular bodyslam and hit their finisher. The No Laughing Matter hits, and the ref has to slow down his count because Sonny Onoo is late breaking up the pin. This was just two guys filling time until an uninspiring finish, even playing as background to Eric Bischoff confiscating a VHS tape of Hogan losing to Piper, but they hit each other hard and that's enough to make it the best match of the first hour of this Nitro. 

5. Harlem Heat vs. Faces of Fear

ER: This had some timing mistakes and a messy finish, and is really only saved by Faces of Fear's willingness to lean into Harlem Heat's kicks. Harlem Heat really don't show a lot of team chemistry (although to be fair, a lot of that is Stevie Ray being where he doesn't belong), and a lot of their simplest strikes show a lot of light. There are a few big moments in the match, like Barbarian taking a stiff Booker axe kick and not going down, only to get leveled right after by a Harlem sidekick. Barbarian also hit an insane top rope belly to belly on Booker that really threw him to the opposite corner, and to put over how dangerous that landing could have been, Col. Parker came out in his French Legionnaire get-up and whipped Sherri's ass with his riding crop. French Canadians interfere, Harlem Heat get the win even though the interference was aimed at them, and this should have ended with Faces of Fear massacring everyone instead of just rolling away. 

6. Disco Inferno vs. Glacier

ER: This was great, loved every second of it. Glacier was still pretty new, only a few months in, and I'm not sure there was a person on the WCW roster who could stooge better for Glacier's offense at this point. He's great at setting up his own ass kicking, too, taunting Glacier on the mic after Glacier's long entrance. "Look Glacier, you're career is just starting." Telling Glacier that if he knew what was best for him he'd leave, before Disco embarrassed him. I love that stuff. When Glacier finally just grabs him with a top wristlock throw, Disco holds onto the mic the entire time and yells into it in pain through the whole bump. Not all of Glacier's kicks and palm thrusts look great, but Disco makes every single legsweep and leaping kick and palm strike look as great as they will look. Disco pinballed and did pratfalls and made a ton of great OFF noises every time he caught heel (palm or foot) to the breadbox. 

There's a great transition to Disco's control, when he tries to use referee Scott Dickinson as a human shield, distracting Glacier enough to plaster him with a great western lariat. All of Disco's offense looked great, like his snapped off swinging neckbreaker or his elbowdrop straight down onto Glacier's throat. But what looks even better is Disco posing for far too long on the turnbuckles as Glacier does a kip up to a big reaction (obviously, because kip ups are cool) in the background, then hits a flat out gorgeous highlight reel Cryonic Kick as Disco turns around and jumps right into it. You could make an effective Glacier video package using shots of this kick a few times. His form is excellent, the arc on the kick is impressively vertical, and it looks straight out of a John Woo movie. This is the finisher of a guy who is justifying his push. Loved this. 

7. Chris Benoit vs. Chris Jericho

ER: A great example of the 4 minute Nitro workrate match. It's a fairly breathless 4 minute sprint, exactly what fans of these two would enjoy seeing. Tenay refers to him as "Mr. Intensity" Christ Benoit, but that nickname doesn't really fit (and I don't think ever caught on). Benoit isn't really intense here, so much as he has a real vicious dead-eyed performance. Both guys are showcased and get big spots, and things ramp up quick with a great Jericho springboard dropkick that sends Benoit sprawling off the apron, and follows it up with a missile dropkick to the floor! Benoit's offense is delivered really violently; he catches Jericho with a hotshot, throws hard stomps to the back of the head, blistering chops, and a hard landing fast elbowdrop. Jericho refuses to get run over and slams into Benoit with a stiff falling lariat to give the match a good breath. Benoit wins fairly easily with a big back suplex off the top, but this was an action-packed 4 minutes. 

A super entertaining promo happens in the entrance way after the match, with Flair strutting around in a college pullover, Woman looking drop dead gorgeous, Mongo wearing a chambray shirt the same color as his jeans, and another great Debra McMichael promo. Debra is an extremely underappreciated character in wrestling. A condescending Texas Christian who slurs her words and insults you to your face with a "bless your heart" smile just begging to be slapped. Debra does Dynasty party talk better than Dynasty did party talk. When Woman leaves after getting into it with Debra, Debra tells Gene "she's got all these built up hostilities because of her weight gain over the holidays". It's so cutting. Mongo has incredible denim meathead energy, yelling at Woman "That'll be the day, when a skirt like you tells Mongo what to do!" The McMichaels are amazing. 

8. Mascarita Sagrada/Octagoncito vs. Jerrito Estrada/Piratita Morgan

ER: I had no memory of WCW attempting a minis division, and it's pretty wild to just throw out 4 minis unannounced to the Knoxville crowd in the third hour of Nitro and give them 2 minutes to get over. I'm not sure why you even bother sending guys out to that kind of fate. Still, they work a lot of cool spots into less than 2.5 minutes and the fans do start reacting to it. WCW only used these guys for two matches, and this reaction was probably at least as good as any of the reactions they got in front of cold disinterested WWF shows from 97-99. Jerrito bumps appropriately big for a mini version of Jerry Estrada, doing strong base work for all of Sagrada's headscissors and monkey flips. Piratita takes a couple of really big bumps for a big boy, including a great somersault bump past the ringpost to the floor, and there was a fun extended sequence where the rudos kept being lured into doing chain offense to each other. I am not sure why this happened, but it was an enjoyable blink. 

9. Dean Malenko vs. Rey Misterio Jr. 

ER: Matches like these are why a lot of us were switching over to Nitro in 96/97, but a lot of them are weird time capsules now. The moves look good, there's often little story behind them aside from "get up and do more" and the crowds react with most arms folded silence until the matches end in confusion. Here a 9 minute match gets the 10 minute time limit draw treatment, a bell just ringing in the middle of an exchange like the recess bell sounding during a game of capture the flag. The fans weren't reacting to any of the several ungiving back bumps that Rey took, and suddenly ending a match in a draw wasn't going to help. Malenko and Misterio work well together, that's no secret, because Rey can get his head powerbombed into the mat several times a match and Dean is great at catching complicated headscissors and ranas. Early on Malenko works over Rey's back in painful ways, getting him vertical with a single leg crab while digging his knee in, throwing him way up into the air for an awesome flapjack, his great press slam gutbuster, bouncing Misterio with a Last Ride style powerbomb, all punishing stuff. The problem is that for Rey to get in any offense, he has to ignore that he just got his cerebellum smashed into the mat at concussion speed and bounce back to his feet to sprint around. Rey has some crazy moments, like an unhinged butt splash senton from the top rope over the ringpost to the floor, and a cool rana to the floor where he Fuerza bumps his way into getting his legs around Malenko's neck. There were a couple of cool reversals that played off early spots, like Dean catching a headscissors and sitting down into a sideslam, or Rey flying over Dean's head and turning a pop-up powerbomb into a Manami Roll. It all looked cool, but it didn't really play as a full match, and when they just went into a few rapid fire pinfall exchanges they felt like they came from a different match. It's a recommendable match because it's 10 minutes of cool stuff, but every move feels like it happens in its own vacuum.

10. Lex Luger vs. Greg Valentine

ER: Greg Valentine is in his mid-40s here, but when your wrestling style revolves around dropping heavy elbows, throwing stiff chops, and leaning into strikes, well then that's a style that is going to age well. He does feel like an anachronism in this era, but this was a fun short match made up almost entirely of punches, elbows, and clotheslines. When two guys are good at throwing punches and elbows you really don't need much more than that to fill a fun 3 minutes. Valentine really roughs up Luger, and when it's his time to sell he does some great tip toes selling for Luger's punches, and goes down with a thud for Luger's clotheslines. Luger drags Valentine over the ropes from the apron to Rack him, which is a cool babyface visual. 

The show ends on a great segment, with Hogan and the FULL cast and crew of the nWo surrounding Piper and giving him a stiff beatdown. They bash his surgically repaired hip with a chair, Scott Norton really puts the boots to him, Hall/Nash/Hogan do an ill-advised three man press slam and throw spike Piper chest first across Norton's knee, just a total beatdown. Piper gets stretchered out, the garbage rains onto the ring and the nWo (Scott Hall ignoring a full box of popcorn hitting his back, Bischoff never flinching at soda cups. It all leads to the Giant standing up to Hogan and choking him, then fighting off a ton of nWo flunkies. Giant looked like a real monster, and there was a cool visual of Hogan directing the full nWo roster to surround the ring. Bagwell attacks first, leaping off the top rope onto Giant's back and getting flung across the ring. Vincent runs directly into Giant's hand, and Giant palms his head like a basketball while wasting him with a chokeslam. nWo Sting takes another great chokeslam, before the big guys get involved and they swarm the Giant. This is part of what made the nWo great. It was a common talking point at the time that allowing a ton of "lesser" workers into the nWo weakened the entire operation, made it into a club with no kind of exclusivity. But you NEED members to strengthen your gang. You NEED bodies. You need cannon fodder. Vincent is a great guy to get pushed by Hogan into a chokeslam. It's great to have a fake Sting who gets his ass kicked. Even Michael Wallstreet, in his mullet and sleeveless nWo shirt, actually looked cool for the first time in who knows when. He looked like a guy who would get his ass beat in a Bronson movie, and the nWo needed guys like that. Bray Wyatt only recruited like one guy into his cult. How stupid is that?? You recruit EVERYBODY YOU CAN. 

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WCW World War 3 11/24/96

From beautiful (?) Norfolk, Virginia, in front of over 10,000 wrestling fans looking at three large gleaming wrestling rings set up like the Tri-Force, comes the only PPV appearances of Roadblock and Tony Rumble. Who wouldn't want to watch this!? I've never seen it. Let's ride.

1. Rey Misterio Jr. vs. The Ultimate Dragon

ER: This was wild. Ultimo (I'm going to call him Ultimo, but used their weird Ultimate spelling above since they had it in their graphic) took like 85% of this match and won the thing about as definitively as someone could win a match. I guess I had forgotten that Rey became a big star, but they were still pushing Ultimo as a clearly bigger star. Dragon broke out every single piece of offense he knew and it all looked great. This whole thing is just a straight run of bigger and bigger moves. His leg kick combos looked crisp and looked really good for a guy who prides himself on not working stiff. His bodyslams looked Finlay stiff, so that was an awesome surprise. Soon he was building up to big backbreakers, a great tombstone piledriver, a piledriver on the floor, a powerbomb, a RUNNING powerbomb, vicious brainbuster...I mean it was a crazy one-sided beating and Misterio is really great at taking a one sided beating. The crowd gets almost uncomfortable watching Dragon just wreck Rey over and over.

Heenan: "Misterio has landed on the back of his head at least 15 times in this match!"

He's not wrong. Rey finally makes a little run by getting a boot up in the corner, but he overshoots an ambitious two rope split legged moonsault. Even Dusty has to point out on commentary that Misterio got like none of it. Rey has a couple nice rana roll ups, but it just makes more want to see more of Ultimo's awesome video game offense. And boy do I ever get my wish. Rey goes for a huge springboard rana, but Ultimo catches it, bounces him off the top rope, and then absolutely PLANTS Rey with a sitout powerbomb. It finishes the match, and looked like something that should have DEFINITELY finished the match.

2. Nick Patrick vs. Chris Jericho

ER: Goddamn this match rules. This makes me so pissed that we didn't get a run of Nick Patrick as a worker during this era WCW. He's like a god tier Danny McBride character in this match, just a magnificent stooge who genuinely looked like a better worker here than half of the active roster (and WCW had an impressive as hell roster). This match is brilliant. Jericho has one arm tied behind his back, and they work a fantastic match not only based around Jericho with one good arm, but Patrick doing mean offense to a guy with one arm while also convincingly taking a beating from that same man. Both guys' offense looks really good in this, Jericho pulling out a really impressive performance with use of only one arm, breaking out with a cool kick combo, a big leaping shoulderblock, actually some pretty impressive stuff with your body balance thrown off. But Nick Patrick is a real marvel here. He works like a great Memphis worker, throwing nice submarine angle uppercut right hands and fast excellently worked left jabs. He has as many doofus stooge faces as John Tatum, and any wrestler who tips the Tatum Scales for me is going to immediately be a guy who I champion. Patrick is not only a great bumper, he's able to take great bumps while conveying a guy who isn't someone who should be taking bumps.

I remember seeing an interview with Martin Landau about his wonderful performance in Ed Wood, where he talked about how seriously he took the role of Bela Lugosi; how he thought Lugosi was a true legend who he wanted to honor, so much that he thought out each aspect of the character in detailed fashion. And he talked about the crazy method depths he went to properly capture Bela, down to the fact that he didn't just want to do an accurate Romanian accent, he wanted to do an accent of a Romanian man who was insecure about his accent negatively affecting his career. Nick Patrick seems to understand his role in this match as well as Landau knew what tone to use to play Lugosi. Nick Patrick brawled like Windham and stooged like Tatum, and that's something I'm going to be impressed as hell by. Patrick uses the setting really well, brawling to the floor, hitting a cool ring post bump into a ring post joining two rings, setting up a spot where Jericho missed a punch and decked the ring post (Jericho played into all these transition spots GREAT), Patrick found cool ways to take this match into a couple rings and show off to several sides of the arena. That's an AMAZING skill. Patrick throws a ton of great punches throughout, great quick jabs, and then to show you how much of a rebel badass he is Nick Patrick does the Curt Hennig rolling neck snap! Patrick even takes a back drop bump, with Jericho setting it up impressively for a guy with one arm. This match was an absolute blast, I can't believe it isn't some kind of cult favorite. It's really great. Patrick is a legend and there's no sign that he'd even worked a match in the prior decade, and then he turns in this incredible performance?? I would have this super high on a 1996 MOTY List, as ridiculous as that sounds. Not just a superior gimmick match, but a superior pro wrestling match.

3. Giant vs. Jeff Jarrett

ER: This was pretty great, a cool bout derailed by a Crow Sting appearance that should have pissed off Jarrett and Giant. This match felt like a cool Coliseum Video hidden gem, like a cool Doink vs. Giant Gonzalez match that you've never heard anyone talk about. Giant was really quick and had different movement than when he was older and slower, so it was cool to see him throw a hard lariat with a lot more lunge. Jarrett bumped nice for him but also made sure his own shots looked good, and I like seeing the kind of shots in David/Goliath matches where the smaller guy jumps up for corner 10 count punches but gets shoved off, bumping backwards, and these two do a great version of that. Sting comes out and walks around the rafters, and Jarrett and Giant have to continue showing interest while literally the entire crowd is now watching Sting. But these two are good soldiers and this is a fun professional well worked match. Giant takes a big bump to the floor, and misses a big elbow drop off the middle buckle. He hits a hard bodyslam and this whole show can do no wrong.

We got a really great Hogan/Piper contract signing, genuinely up there with the great contract signings of all time, and I'm someone who really likes a good contract signing. The whole nWo is out there surrounding Piper, Hogan, Nash, Hall, Bischoff, Giant, all closing in as Piper talks tall. Hogan is really mean on the mic, some of his best mic work I've heard from this era. He keeps needling Piper about his hip, makes Piper lift up his kilt to show his hip surgery scar, says "I normally don't beat up cripples, but I can't wait to beat up a gimp!" Holy shit, that's pretty cruel. Piper getting jumped and doing his best to fight back while going down was great, and him staggering back to his feet before the nWo had completely left was a strong visual. I'd never really heard about this segment (and wasn't watching wrestling when this originally aired) but this should be talked about as one of the best examples of building interest in a match with a hot contract signing. I really want to watch Starrcade 96 right now.

4. Amazing French Canadians vs. Harlem Heat

ER: Guess what, this also ruled. This felt like an ECW house show tag, 4 big guys hitting hard and bumping hard, building to some awesome highspots. Rougeau was a great bumper in tags like this, really made Harlem Heat look like stars. Booker misses a high sidekick and catches the top rope, and the Canadians take control and the match keeps getting more fun. We build to this insane spot where the Canadians stack up a table across the ring corner, then put the RING STEPS on top of that table, and then already-insane-in-1996 PCO climbs to the top buckle and to the top of the ring steps, and MISSES the biggest cannonball ever attempted. This would have actually murdered Stevie Ray if he didn't get out of the way. I watched his ROH match from Mania weekend the day before I watched this and in that he gets powerbombed from the ring down to the floor - nobody catching him, just literally a powerbomb to the floor - and miss a cannonball from the top to the ring apron. This guy really is genuinely crazy, it's been happening for at least 23 years and at a certain point it can't be a work. PCO is nuts. Booker throws a ton of cherries on this delicious sundae with a vicious Harlem Hangover, that leg whipping perfectly and safely across PCO's jaw. Great 10 minute banger, best PPV ever so far.

We get a brief brawl between Col. Parker and Sherri Martel as part of the tag match stipulation, and it's freaking great. Sherri jumps him and the fans get way into it. Parker takes a huge bump over the top to the floor and Dusty is losing his shit the entire time, going absolutely bonkers. Sherri hits a couple flying clotheslines and a big crossbody off the top and the entire crowd is standing when she hits that crossbody. This is the perfect way to do a manager brawl, and I even wish we got a longer version of it.

5. Psychosis vs. Dean Malenko

ER: Goddamn this PPV absolutely smokes. This is a tough match with both guys staying tight and grounded, relying on some nice strikes and building to a couple big bumps, working a lot of more BattlArts style submission sections. The crowd is silent as hell which is a shame, they've been so hot for everything else and maybe they were already burned out? The PPV has been nothing but great matches and great promos. It's such a fun match to be quiet during, and they seem like a crowd who would be into their thing. Psychosis does his rope flip bump but lands on his feet instead of head, and turns it into a cool spinkick comeback; it's like he used that bump the same way you see a rebound lariat and it was cool. Psychosis does make up for the missing "crazy bump" quota and take a nutso leap to nothing off the top, catching his face on the guardrail. It's one of those dangerous Psychosis bumps where you can't tell if he botched something, or if he's an all timer and missed that ugly on purpose (I think it was the latter). Dusty excitedly says "We in the midst of it" and it sounds cool and he's absolutely right. This whole thing had a cool WCW BattlArts vibe, cool subs and matwork with some flashy quick armdrag variations and some nice strikes, something that I might not have known how to process when this originally aired. Maybe that's why the crowd was so quiet. I seem to remember the general opinion being that these two were a disappointing "mainstay" cruiserweight match-up in WCW, but maybe that was just a stupid guy's opinion that got amplified too loud? Because this match ruled.

6. The Outsiders vs. Faces of Fear vs. The Nasty Boys

ER: Shit this PPV really does feel like the total embodiment of Where the Big Boys Play. This PPV has had a ton of big dudes running into each other. This match is filled with a cool mixture of stiff motherfucker and sneaky motherfucker, and that's a combination you don't often get from a big time professional wrestling company. This is more like a three way race on Scooby's Laff-A-Lympics, and Laff-A-Lympics as Wrestling is something I want right this very second. FoF and Nasty Boys especially kick the shit out of each other, mean knees to the face, chops to the neck, full force collisions; at one point Meng clotheslines Knobbs so hard that you wonder why you ever watch anything that isn't pro wrestling. Outsiders do an amusing job of staying out of this while the other two teams beat bruises into each other, clapping from the apron at the men performing for them. BUT then they get tagged in and Hall is throwing a nice right hand one moment, but then being choked and thrown violently into the corner by Barbarian. This is a legendary big boys battle and nobody is talking about it! I've heard absolutely no opinions on this show and it's fucking incredible. Barbarian slams into Hall with an avalanche that is not so much an avalanche as it is just Barbarian running full speed into Hall. We get an incredible moment of various guys leaping at and attacking guys on the apron, the whole thing feels messy and violent in the best ways. I think every guy in this match misses an elbow drop that they don't actually expect to me a missed elbow drop. Like there is honestly a match-long prank war to see who can make someone miss an elbow more painfully. There are multiple piledrivers, Jimmy Hart is wearing his Misfits jacket with fucking skulls on the shoulders, this whole thing rules. It's a long match, too, over 15 minutes, and it completely rules. I am so in the bag for this show. My god.

7. WORLD WAR 3!!!

ER: These things were terrible, right? I have a very large TV, and when they cut to three separate screens you officially can barely see a thing. I would wager most 1996 viewers were watching this, somehow, on a TV at least half the size of my 2019 TV. This is a 60 person nude beach fuckfest filmed by a guy hiding a half mile away in the bushes. It's the kind of thing that would actually be better if it was just fullscreen and they just switched cameras a ton. It's a damn shame really, you hate to see it, because you can't see it. Because from every minuscule camera shot this whole match REALLLY looked like it ruled. First, it's freaking weird. The entrance might be the best part as 60 different WCW guys just walk out single file and the order is almost completely unplanned, just an endless parade of guys that you mostly know. The whole thing had great energy, you just couldn't see 90% of it at any given time. 

We start with Benoit jumping Sullivan on the floor and brawling through the crowd (with Konnan and Ray Traylor?), Tony Rumble is not only in this match for reasons that wouldn't make any sense to me or anybody, but he's also the first eliminated and Dusty yells out on commentary "Tony Rumble IS GONE!" From there we get flashes of brilliance when we can actually see any of what's going on. Villano IV punches the hell out of Jarrett, Parka punches people, a ton of eliminations look fantastic (Dave Taylor flies wildly off an Alex Wright dropkick, Road Block - in his only PPV appearance - eats a huge clothesline, we get a spot where 8 different guys do running corner attacks on Ron Studd and then DOGPILE him in the ring!), and the final 10 is a fantastic collection of the nWo vs. DDP, Regal, Luger, and Rey. It's so damn good. 

Once they get back to fullscreen and run through all the nWo vs. WCW, it really shows how hot of a battle royal this appeared to be. Regal tricks DDP into charging him and DDP flies to the floor, it takes Hall, Nash, and Syxx to eliminate Regal and he fights the whole way, and while the Giant win was exciting it really should have been Luger. The EASY MVP of the match was Regal. Every single time he popped into camera he looked like a megastar, and he was by far the greatest part of that final 8. Regal was an incredible fighting babyface here, and he stood out more than anybody throughout the entire match; from lacing into Riggs early on to walking tall right up to his elimination, this is an underrated great Regal performance.

ER: Wow, what a PPV. This is honestly one of the best PPVs I've ever watched. This needs to be discussed more. I need to do a podcast where I have a new guest on and we just watch and talk about World War 3 1996. New week, new guest, same PPV.

World War 3 and Me.

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WCW A-Sides? WCW Nitro 10/21/96

Bobby Eaton vs. Chris Jericho

ER: This match unexpectedly got a lot of time (nearly 8 minutes) and it really built into something fun after a slow, distracting start. You see, Syxx and nWo Sting came out under a big nWo banner and we would get occasional cutaways to those two in the crowd sucking away a lot of the attention. So there was a longish moment in the first half of this where Jericho held a hammerlock waiting for the crowd to come around. It was feeling like this was going to be a disappointment, but the whole thing snapped to life with a strike exchange. Jericho threw some nice slaps to Eaton's chest, then when they started throwing right hands I was in. Jericho would throw 2 or 3 for every 1 of Eaton's, with Eaton landing a couple doozies. Crowd didn't care about nWo members after this. Eaton fed Jericho some nice stuff, took his big springing dropkick that he bumped off the apron to the floor, Eaton takes a nice post shot then ducks so Jericho throws a back elbow to the post, shoot Eaton even takes a backdrop into the entrance way, far past the point the mats end. Eaton still gets a lot in this one even it's supposed to be building Jericho up for a match with Syxx, and we get a great Eaton kneedrop off the top right to Jericho's chest, and a cool reversal where he snaps a swinging neckbreaker to reverse a Jericho backdrop attempt, and I'm really glad this recovered and then some. It feels like nWo sucked the interest out of a lot of matches from this era, glad these two persevered.

We get a great Rey Misterio Jr. highlight package, him hitting a bunch of fast ranas while we get a lot of experimental 1996 digital video editing color washes and graphics, while some mournful instrumental guitar plays over it. Not mournful guitar like "Maggot Brain", but more like the mournful guitar in one of those scenes in Renegade where Lorenzo Lamas comes into contact with an old flame, and they reconnect somewhere at sunset, which is when he finds out she's now involved with the cartel.

Jimmy Graffiti vs. Dean Malenko

ER: This is the debut of Jimmy Graffiti, which is all kinds of weird 1996 wrestling. Graffiti is known better as Jimmy Del Ray, one half of the Heavenly Bodies, and it's shocking how much younger he looks without his Rod Beck fluffy mullet/handlebar mustache combo. A smooth face, sensible haircut, and his trademark pale complexion makes him look like the cruiserweight version of The Undertaker, if Undertaker was dressed like a 90s John Cena. I have no idea what the plan was, putting Jimmy Del Ray in baggy jorts and a hockey jersey with subway tagged wrestling boots, but he's out there and this weirdo must be face as Malenko was working heel opposite Rey during this time. And these two have a fun back and forth cruiser match, Graffiti getting a lot of nearfalls and taking some big bumps in exchange. Graffiti takes the Harley Race bump to the floor, getting his feet hooked on the bottom rope and dropping onto his head (and it's weird seeing Schiavone and Zbyszko doing commentary from a folding table right against the ring), and later Dean takes them both to the floor with a crossbody (potentially dangerous bump as it sends both to the floor faster than normal, Graffiti sprawling into the guardrail); Graffiti even takes a pretty mean backdrop suplex and eats some boots to the head from Dean. Malenko is overly generous with Graffiti, giving him several roll-ups nearfalls, Graffiti hits a big sitout powerbomb and a missile dropkick, gets to push out of the Cloverleaf a couple times, really he gets way more of the match than I would have guessed going in.

Diamond Dallas Page vs. Sgt. Craig Pittman

ER: Fun little match that adds a nice twist into it's sub-3 minute runtime. It looks like it's going to be a Page squash, and we get a cool moment of DDP hitting his great piledriver slam (really looks like he's bouncing foreheads off mat), and when Pittman kicks out it lands DDP on top of ref Nick Patrick (who has worn a neck brace all night) and as he sells back pain from DDP landing on him you wouldn't believe how loudly the crowd cheers his pain. I didn't remember nWo heel ref Nick Patrick being so reviled. DDP does a real clever bit of business here as he is on the floor and starts soaking up Nick Patrick's cheers as his own, allowing Pittman to reach through the ropes and grab DDP's arm, yanking him into the ringpost. Pittman is really vicious going after an arm, and I especially like when he throws uppercuts and short arm shoulderblocks to someone, here he also gets to stretch DDP's arm all around the ropes and even gets a visual tap to the Code Red armbar. Alas, Nick Patrick saw nothing, and Pittman eats a Diamondcutter nicely.

Ron Studd vs. Jeff Jarrett

ER: I like the concept of matching Jarrett up against a giant right before he is facing the Giant at Havoc, but they don't do much interesting with it. Studd lifts Jarrett up by the neck a few times, but then they have Jarrett actually hit a vertical suplex with no struggle at all, just gets on his tiptoes, tosses an arm over Studd, and lifts him right over. Then takes an eternity to lock on a figure 4.

Road Block vs. Lex Luger

ER: This episode is clearly booked around my sensibilities, as not only did we get the Jimmy Graffiti debut, but Road Block debuts on the same episode?! And I love how WCW used to handle the debuts of guys like this: Basically pretend you have no idea who they are. Road Block isn't going to beat Luger, but they're at least saying things like "who is this guy? He's huge!" There's a lot of Irish whipping in this match, both guys setting up nearly every attack by first whipping the other into the ropes or buckles, with Road Block standing up to lariats and throwing a few mean ones of his own. Big moment is Luger clotheslining Road Block to the floor, big bump for Block. Road Block is dressed like the world's largest swashbuckling pirate, with his two lane highway capris and a striped tank top that looks like something a lifeguard would wear, but the guy is huge, throws a nice lariat, and does an impossibly cool kneedrop right to Luger's face. The finish could have been really awkward, but Luger is so damn over and knows how to milk reaction that it totally works: Luger tries to get Road Block up for the torture rack, but can't. He tries twice and drops him. It doesn't appear that he is intentionally dropping him, just feels like he can't actually rack Road Block. Block just keeps standing back up after falling and getting back in position to be racked. After the second failed attempt Luger even looks to the hard cam and shrugs. But the fans never turn on him and nobody knew about the You Fucked Up chants, and since these are wrestling fans they just actually want to see him rack Road Block. So Luger tries it a third time, succeeds, the crowd flips out, Bischoff and Heenan flip out on commentary, and it turns out some actual human error made the moment a FAR bigger deal than if Luger had just got him up for the rack on the first attempt.

American Males vs. Harlem Heat

ER: Dear WCW, could you please show me the two teams from this era that I would LEAST like to see against each other? Great. Thank you. Also, WCW, could you give it more time than any match on this episode? Just let it go 10, see what these two teams have to offer? Cool. The match starts with Stevie Ray missing a stomach kick by 18", but does get better (although not enough to justify the runtime). Best moment came from Riggs hiptossing Booker T over the top to the floor and Booker bumping big for it (with Heenan rightly wondering why that wasn't a DQ). The rest was filled with a ton of AM dropkicks, a nice Stevie Ray lariat, Col. Parker taking his banana peel bump on the apron when Riggs hits him first, and one of those finishes that always seem to happen in matches with Buff Bagwell, where a pinfall gets broken up slightly too early or slightly too late, so the finish is really confusing and everyone stands around waiting for what to do. It feels like it happened too often in Bagwell matches to be a coincidence. Also, I gotta say I am loving Nick Patrick in his neck brace, holding his neck every single time he counts a pinfall.

The Fantastics vs. Faces of Fear

ER: 1996 Fantastics on my TV screen? What kind of magic episode is this!? But also, it's really weird that they went well over an hour into this episode without a tag match, and then ran back to back tag matches with two blowjob teams working the exact same match back to back. If you have the Fantastics making a weird one off 1996 TV appearance, maybe don't have your lame in house version of the Fantastics wrestle immediately before them. Also, as much as I like FoF, there's this expectation for Meng matches that rarely actually lives up to reality. Meng is regarded as one of the toughest dudes in pro wrestling history, so everybody always assumes that he has a laundry list of matches where he just takes mean liberties with opponents. But really, he doesn't. I have seen hardly any instances of Meng looking even slightly unprofessional - or even working slightly more stiff than normal - in any match. Look at any heel tag team squash match from 90s WWF and you will likely find a team that treats opponents worse than Meng does. That doesn't mean the matches aren't still fun though. This is mostly the FoF show, and honestly until the final 30 seconds of the match I wasn't sure that any of Bischoff/Heenan/Tenay even knew which Fantastic was which, or even knew their names. After hearing all of them repeatedly refer to each member of the team as "The Fantastics" the entire match (as in "The Fantastics really need to tag out here!"), it wasn't until Tenay actually mentioned Tommy Rogers during his hot tag that I figured at least Tenay knew. But then he *does* just call Bobby Fulton "Fulton", so it's possible he wasn't confident he could identify him as Jackie or Bobby. But just like with the American Males, we get mostly dropkicks from the Fantastics, with most of this worked as an extended FoF squash. We get one really great moment of Bobby taking a backdrop from Meng, but getting caught and powerbombed by Barbarian. Tommy takes a nice bump getting knocked off the apron by Meng, and even kicks Meng in the head a couple times to break up pinfalls (and again, someone knowing Meng's rep would then think that Meng was going to serve up a cruel receipt to Tommy, but that doesn't happen, because Meng only bites off noses outside of the ring), Fantastics throw a tandem dropkick off the middle and Tommy hits one off the top, but FoF amusingly win when Barbarian picks up Tommy for a front slam and Meng just kicks him in the head.

J.L. vs. nWo Sting

ER: I never understood why Jerry Lynn just went by "JL" in WCW. He was under a mask, he could have literally been any name, and it's not like the majority of fans knew who Jerry Lynn was in 1996 anyway. "Gotta keep these initials to stay true to my fans." This show was IN Minnesota. These are his people right here, and nobody knew he was a Minnesota boy. Had he been something 1996-cool like Laser Swarm or if the JL stood for something weird like Jett Lust, then he would have at least gotten a reaction for that. It doesn't get more non-starter than the name JL. nWo Sting gets a great reaction until people realize it's not actually Sting, and I love how he plays up all the mannerisms. The match is more angle than match, but I liked Sting's nice falling powerslam.

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My Favorite Wrestling: WCW Main Event 7/7/96

If that date sounds familiar, it's because this is the pre-show to Bash at the Beach, where something *kind* of huge would go on to happen.

1. The Steiner Bros. vs. Harlem Heat

This match works just fine, until it inevitably turns into the continuing saga of Col. Robert Parker and Sherri, as practically every Heat tag from this era did. In rewatching a lot of this era it was surprising how terrible a lot of the Heat matches were. I remembered them as a decent team but man were they sloppy and man did their tags have horrible structure. But Booker was on during the first part of this, flying into Scott with a huge shoulderblock, working him over with a nice bearhug that Scott turned into an even nicer overhead belly to belly. Rick came in and hit a great powerslam on Booker, and things (shockingly!) slowed down quite a bit once Stevie Ray tagged in. Stevie hits a nice elbowdrop, and then locks on a neverending chinlock until the Parker interference. For his part Parker takes a big hip toss bump into the ring from the apron. On the previous show they were advertising Steiners vs. Rock n Roll Express which would have been awesome. Instead we get this. And this...was probably better than I expected.

2. Billy Kidman vs. Hardwork Bobby Walker

So let's start off by saying that this match gets 90 seconds. Let's go on to say that these guys clearly knew they were only getting 90 seconds, and proceeded to do as much as they possibly could in 90 seconds. Something seemed up right from the beginning as both guys are just working lightning fast. It looked like things were on double speed and I'm thinking "man how are these guys expecting to work a full match at this pace??" Oh, they weren't. But it was fun seeing a noted schlub like Walker going fullspeed, with both guys doing these super quick dropdowns and leapfrogs, Kidman taking a wild bump to the floor off a dropkick, and both working in kooky offense I've never seen either do before. Kidman hit a quadruple jump Asai moonsault (follow me here) starting on the apron, leaping to the middle rope, then the top rope, then the inside middle rope 90 degrees to his left, and then the moonsault. It's like a crazy Aerostar move, with about 70% of the grace of an Aerostar move. Walker jumps to the middle turnbuckle, leaps BACKWARDS from the middle buckle to the top, almost loses his balance and falls backwards to the floor (because it's fucking crazy to jump backwards from the middle to the top) and then hits a crossbody/headbutt block from the top to win. Weird little match with the circumstances dictating unique work.

3. Rock N Roll Express vs. Fire & Ice

Another 2 minute special that really could have been a good tag match if it had been given just a few more minutes. Norton rushes Ricky to start and hits some pretty stiff shots, a couple pretty big slams. Ice Train tags in and hits a rough avalanche. This Morton guy is pretty decent at playing Ricky Morton. Finish is clever but would have loved for it to come after more of a match, as Norton tags back in, picks Ricky up in a gutwrench and Ricky's legs hit Ice Train on the apron causing Norton to stumble. Gibson runs in and takes out Norton's knee allowing Ricky to hit the backslide. That's a pretty decent finish, but yeah didn't get a whole lot of match before it happened.

4. Eddie Guerrero vs. Steven Regal

Now this is the kind of thing you hope for when you pop in an old WCW disc. Is it too short? Yes. Does it have a lousy finish? You betcha. Is everything awesome before that? Well of course. Regal looks so damn good here, with he and Eddie doing all sorts of cool grapples and take downs. Eddie lands on his feet after a monkey flip, hits a cool armdrag off a Regal butterfly suplex attempt, Regal starts lacing in elbows and then Eddie takes a super fast bump to the floor off a Regal toss. Weirdness ensues when Regal fakes a knee injury, suckers Eddie in for a double leg for what you think is going to end it. But something weird happens as Nick Patrick just stops counting at 2, even though Eddie didn't kick out. It looks like Regal was supposed to have his feet on the ropes, but he never puts them there, so Patrick just has to stop the count for zero reason instead of stop the count after witnessing the cheating. The Eddie just rolls up Regal for the win. Folks you won't see a finish worse than that one. But god that first 90 seconds of the match was all the stuff you want in pro wrestling.

Okay, Cubs, that one was a whole lot more...interesting as an episode. Still waiting for an actual good match as so far we've gotten some big time potential that was cut short with bad finishes. We'll keep trying until I think your donation has been worth it for you. Again, thank you SO MUCH for your help.


***I'm still desperately trying to raise money for my friend and coworker whose home burned down. I'm matching every contribution and will continue writing above and beyond for those who donate. This means a lot to me, guys***

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My Favorite Wrestling! WCW Main Event 9/6/97 & 9/13/97

1. Harlem Heat vs. Texas Hangmen

Man, did Harlem Heat work syndicated shows more than any other team? Feels like I have seen more than enough HH for one lifetime. You know you aren't going to get much of a competitive match here, and when Stevie Ray leans into the camera and says "This won't take long," I believe him and I hate that he is so convincing with these words. Sure enough Harlem Heat takes pretty much all of this with their Harlem Heat offense. I get briefly excited when the Texans side step Booker, then come in and hit him with a double clothesline. But that's it as Booker spins his way up and hits a nice double dropkick. HH win with a Booker jumping sidekick. So much damn Harlem Heat on these discs.

2. Greg Valentine vs. Lex Luger

Really fun match that I'm not sure I ever knew happened in a competitive way. Valentine gets a tons of stuff in here which is nice to see against a big opponent like Luger. Luger treats Valentine like a real threat and Valentine plays up Luger's speed and strength. It's kinda worked with Luger evading Valentine's strikes with speed, and Valentine always trying to catch him. When he does catch him it's awesome as you get a couple big Valentine chops and his excellent elbow drops. Even his missed elbow is pretty much greater than anybody's elbow. Valentine even gets a fun fake win, when he gets the boots up on a corner charge and then pins Luger with the feet on the ropes, he ACTUALLY gets a full 3 count which makes me flip out. Valentine jumps up with his arms raised and then Mark Curtis tells him he saw his feet on the ropes. Valentine flips out and that's when Luger puts him up into the rack for the real win. Really shocked Valentine not only got a visual pin, but an ACTUAL pin, before Luger won. Good on Luger.

1. Prince Iaukea vs. Chavo Guerrero Jr.

Good match, much better than I remember their regular match being (feels like I've seen these two match up a few times). We get some solid mat stuff to start with Chavo having nice go behinds. Iaukea takes a massive bump when he misses a springboard body press to the floor, bumping that barefoot onto the Pro/Worldwide stage is just crazy. Iaukea also admirably misses a springboard splash into the ring and sells his tummy but really could have sold his chin. Looks like he whipped it right into the mat (clearly he didn't hit his chin, but it would have been believably faked). Chavo looked sorta off in spots, as it took him too long sometimes to set up more of the lucha-ish spots. Like he wasn't sure what side to start his La Majistral, so he had to awkwardly walk all around Iaukea. Iaukea looked like a guy here with a lot of promise, but I can't ever remember seeing a really good Iaukea match.

2. Hugh Morrus vs. Jerry Flynn

I talk about having to see a bunch of Harlem Heat matches, but man have I seen a lot of Hugh Morrus. I've now seen more than enough to know that I normally don't like Hugh Morrus matches. But Morrus matches where Jerry Flynn gets to work equal? Okay, that's better. Flynn is really underrated, always bumps big and his strike offense always has great snap. His best matches are against the guys who don't mind getting kicked a few times, and Morrus to his credit takes a lot of kicks here. Flynn takes a big clothesline bump on the floor, landing really hard on that Worldwide stage. Back in and he dishes all sorts of cool kick combs on Morrus, even nailing his one in the corner where he holds the ropes on the way over. Morrus' offense is pretty nice here, hitting a big avalanche and dropping a bunch of nice elbows. Flynn gets set up for No Laughing Matter and looks waaaay too far away, but Morrus actually hits it. Also has a cool little finish touch as Morrus does his bit where he drapes his KO'd opponents arm over him, kicks out at two, and then pins Flynn…but Flynn mixes it up by kicking out RIGHT after the 3. I really dug how that little move showed that Morrus goofing around alllmost cost him.

3. High Voltage vs. Villano IV & Super Calo

Man this coulda been really cool. As it was it was fine, but disappointingly short. It's not a total HV squash, as Calo gets some flashes, and then when Villano tags in he wins all the exchanges against Rage. Rage throws a bunch of punches and Villano blocks all of them, returning fire with his own and backing Rage into the corner to hit a spin kick. Villano looks like a badass throughout, even charging into the ring at one point after Kaos takes a swipe at him, with the ref barely able to hold him back. But fairly quickly Calo gets dumped and Rage hits the nice springboard spinning heel kick for the win. This only got like 2:30. If it got just 5 minutes it could have been a nice little lost gem.

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My Favorite Wrestling! WCW Worldwide 9/15/96

I'm currently on a train from San Diego on up to LA to visit my buddy Will and go to an Angels/Dodgers game. It's a 3 hour train ride, and I figure what better way to tell everybody on the train "don't talk to this loser for 3 hours" than put on 18 year old wrestling with all the gassed bodies, mullets, and neon singlets that 1996 still contained. I snuck on train liquor, I got grapz on the laptop (grapz on lapz!) and I'm set.

1. Jim Powers & Renegade vs. Harlem Heat

Haven't done one of these in awhile and boy did I pick a winner to jump back in on. And you know I talk shit about these guys (for 100% deserved reasons) but this was probably better than it had any right to be. I mean, it wasn't great, but you look at those 4 names and…woof. Harlem Heat has been maybe my least favorite thing about this project, as they're both awful, sloppy, horrible long match workers. But this was probably the Heat match I've enjoyed most from the era so far. When they're in there with a more work rate team it's just always sloppy and awful and ugly looking. But here they are with a couple gassed guys trying to be athletic and it's pretty fun. Really Renegade and Powers don't seem much worse than Heat here, pretty even working level. Powers - despite his ghastly 0.5 Abyss punches - was kinda fun; had a nice go behind, stomped Booker in the face at one point, worked an arm wringer alright. Renegade looked awful but bless him for trying. He tried a sort of slingshot dropkick at one point and kinda landed one foot and almost buckled on the other..but shit it's Renegade trying to do some shit. Good for him. His body press earlier was decent enough. Booker hits a wild standing spin kick that looked cool, and match ended with a potentially grisly double powerbomb where the timing was all off and Renegade almost gets spiked. Harlem Heat: We'll almost dump you on your head at least once in a 5 minute match!

2. V.K. Wallstreet vs. Ice Train

Woman across the aisle from me has a Powerpuff Girls text alert song, the song by Apples in Stereo, and it goes off every fucking time she gets a text. Which is like every minute. I like Apples in Stereo. I do not like this trend  though. Mute yer phone! I'm watching my trash on headphones, because I'm courteous like that. She also has a shirt that says "I woke up looking this good" which is really only a shirt that can be properly worn by really fat men who are comfortable in their skin. If you have even a tiny amount of good looks in you, this shirt will make you look like a real asshole. And worse, if you're like this woman, you don't want to risk the shirt sounding 100% believable. Somebody wears a shirt that says "I woke up looking this good", and my reaction is "Yeah. That probably checks out," and that can't be the reaction they wanted. Anyway, holy shit Ice Train both looked awful in this, AND won the match in 90 seconds. Was not expecting that. Wallstreet gets a clothesline, rest of the match is all Ice Train. Was not expecting a finish this soon as Ice Train doesn't do any cool squash match offense. He does a body slam, knocks VK's head into the turnbuckles a few times, Irish whips him into the turnbuckles…and then pins him with a standing splash. Huh.

Awwww yeah a commercial for Last Man Standing! That movie was pretty awful but totally enjoyed by me. Fun Bruce Dern role, fun William Sanderson role, Christopher Walken as a villain which is always great. Total piece of garbage, but I'll watch Walter Hill's garbage before almost any other director's garbage. Love that guy's vision, whatever it is.

3. Pat Tanaka vs. Rey Misterio Jr.

Goldberg's music hits and the one the only Pat Tanaka comes strolling out in his kung fu jacket. Boy that's weird. I would've loved to see this get some time, but it goes 2:15. Great. Tanaka is working a weird Kung Fu master, lots of odd tai chi poses and karate strikes. It's amusing so I get the guy trying to find a gimmick for himself. Why not? Rey is a little sloppy with some of his stuff, he kinda whiffs on a headscissors that Tanaka has to bump anyway. But this era Rey is always super watchable due to his bumps. Here he gets planted with a powerbomb off a rana attempt and does a great flip bump on a clothesline. Heenan is pretty smart on commentary saying that in the future guys will try and imitate Rey, but nobody will be as good at it.

We get a commercial for Levis wide leg jeans. "You can live your life however you want. I'm gonna live mine WIDE." Catch that wide leg fever.

4. John Tenta vs. Konan

Weird little match with Tenta taking 90% of it. Tenta had his ridiculous half shaved skullet at this point, which really seems like the next look someone like Skrillex will have (maybe without Tenta's cop mustache though). Konnan is usually pretty selfish in his matches, making all his opponents work within his sequences, but Tenta takes this whole thing. I wish he looked better as I'm a Tenta fan, but he didn't look great. He didn't look bad, still throwing a great elbow, nice legdrop and a nice powerslam. But he also had a lot of less than devastating stomach kicks and an ugly missed splash. Konna wins with a somersault senton off the middle rope to a standing Tenta. Never seen Konnan pull that one out before.

5. Hugh Morrus & MAXX vs. Nasty Boys

Wasn't expecting much from this, but whatever it was, was okay. Nasty Boys both made a point to stiff Maxx (ne Muscle) for the whole match, every time he was in. Knobbs threw a bunch of nasty punches  to the side of Maxx's head, and Sags did the same. Maxx does his part by not shying away from them, so that's kinda neat. Hugh Morrus is junk, but he hit his moonsault pretty flush here and mostly stayed out of the way. Knobbs took a nice bump after getting posted by Maxx on the floor. So much like our opening tag, 4 guys I'd rather not watch a bunch, putting forth pretty decent stuff. I'm okay with this.

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My Favorite Wrestling! WCW Worldwide 11/9/97

1. Mark Starr vs. Goldberg

Wow, the fans are booing Goldberg as he comes out. Old ladies are giving him the thumbs down. That means that they were giving Mark Starr the thumbs up right before this. How bizarre is that taken out of context? Look into the future just a couple months and see where Goldberg is. But here he is on Worldwide getting booed by old ladies. The match isn't much but it's really fun seeing a huge era in its infancy, maybe the last time that WCW got something right. You can tell that they knew what they were doing here. They couldn't have known just how big he was going to be, but it's really satisfying knowing that they at least had a plan and were seeing it through. Brain and Tony were talking big things for Goldberg the whole match, saying how he was gonna win WW3 and fight for the title. He was already using the "Who's Next?" catchphrase after the match. They were already putting over the spear and jackhammer finish. Goldberg has a nice powerslam here, and shows some major power by deadlifting Starr a couple times...and also awkwardly stands around for large amounts of time, just waiting for...stuff to happen. But again, it's really fun to see such a major part of wrestling history in its infancy.

2. Mike Rapada vs. Scott Hall

Damn, it's kind of crazy that guys like Hall were still appearing on Worldwide at this point (and in the 2nd match of the show!). I'd bet serious money that nobody anywhere near as big as Hall appeared on Worldwide from '98 to the end. And by the way this squash was really fun. Rapada got absolutely zero offense, but bumped HUGE for Hall, and Hall and Syxx stiffed the bejesus out of him. Hall threw some of the nastiest punches of his career, threw a corner clothesline so stiff that Tony and Bobby couldn't stop talking about it, Syxx cheated constantly and played it up to the crowd great (punching Rapada and then blowing on his fist, elbowing him on the apron and then hamming it up by shaking out his elbow). This is what a jobber squash should be.

3. Scott & Steve Armstrong vs. Harlem Heat

It's been kind of eye opening how bad Harlem Heat were in retrospect. It's no revelation that Stevie Ray looks bad in the ring, but I had really fond views on Booker before starting this. I remembered the Benoit matches, the Saturn and Martel matches, and generally liked his WWE run. But boy has he looked pretty lousy upon rewatch. I don't think I could name 5 sloppier guys in the promotion. He must have just had a really great Jan/Feb '98 and that's where my brain froze. All that being said, the match was alright. HH looked bleh, but they worked stiff so it kind of made up for it. Armstrongs are always game but really they weren't given tons here.

4. Shiima Nobunaga/Sumo Fuji vs. Meng/Barbarian

Well this was fun. The FoF squash the Toryumon boys for 4+ minutes, and while they no sold their offense the whole way through, they still allowed the boys do at least do stuff. CIMA hits a bunch of slick dropkicks, Fuji gets to actually work shoulder block sequences with Barbarian (and holds his own!) and the FoF throw tons of big boots to the face, big chops and big slams.

5. Renegade vs. Steve McMichael

Yeah, yeah. You see those two names up there and you know it's not going to be very good, right? Renegade walks out first and you go "Oh. Renegade is in the main event. Huh." And then Mongo comes out and you just kinda know what you're in for. And you know? It wasn't very good. But really this wasn't *that* bad. This was probably the best match these two are capable of, and that has to be worth something. It's almost 5 minutes, and the main thing that stood out to me was that they didn't rest at all. No chin locks. I've gotten so used to 4 minute WWE matches that no matter what have to include a chinlock transition to comeback, that it was kind of jarring seeing two big guys work a 5 minute sprint. Yeah, some of the moves didn't look good. Renegade looks like he couldn't punch through paper. But for what it was, an actual fast paced match between a couple of lugs, this worked for me.

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My Favorite Wrestling! WCW Worldwide 8/11/96

WCW Worldwide 8/11/96

1. High Voltage vs. Eddie and Chavo Guerrero

High Voltage do a bunch of press slam spots and I think that always makes me think they're more awesome than they actually are. Whatever. Rage doing a bunch of presses here lead to a cool Eddie roll-up reversal. But whatever, HV's springboard spots always look great. Heenan's commentary also never ceases to shit all over Mexicans.

2. Kevin Sullivan vs. Chad Brock

Brock bumped around pretty well for Sullivan, but I hate Sullivan squashes because they're always like 50 seconds and he does all his moves in the exact same order: back a guy into the corner with chops, throw him to the floor, go out and get him (if '97, insert Jacqueline vertical suplexing the guy here), tree of woe, double foot stomp. Bleh.

3. Maxx vs. Ice Train

Lee Marshall humbly talking about "powerful men feeling each other out" made Rachel laugh and filled me with wrestle shame. I think this match actually could have benefitted from more time. I think it needed more time to build up that both guys' power cancels the other's out, so the person with the better combo of power and speed will win. Instead we only get one shoulder block no-sold by both, with both flexing and screaming, and then we go into Ice Train spots. I would have liked to see more power parity spots. I did like Maxx's big missed leaping back elbow, but this wasn't great.

4. Big Bubba vs. Chip Minton

Bubba looks like a total skeet here with a week long bender beard and homemade sleeveless shirt. Minton is game here for a beating and Bubba doles out a pretty decent one with a nice big boot, GREAT headbutt from the apron, couple big time slams, although he did look like he was yawning and sleepwalking his way through this. Minton has some really impressive leaping ability and I'm shocked WCW never tried to do more with him as it seems like they could have gotten SOME publicity out of it.

5. Rough & Ready (Enos and Slater) vs. Harlem Heat

I actually don't remember the Enos/Slater team at all. This match gets a lot of time, 11 minutes, and is pretty decent. But good lord Harlem Heat is just not very good at all. They've probably aged worse than anybody in this span. Stevie Ray is worse than you remember him, and yes I know how badly you remembered him. Enos and Slater actually make Stevie Ray offense look good and for that they get enormous credit. Enos throws a standing overhead belly-to-belly that dumps Booker right on his head. Ouch. Stevie Ray throws a clothesline to Slater's stomach that Slater has absolutely no clue how to sell. But overall this whole match works because most of it is awesome Enos/Slater control segments, with my favorite part being Enos cutting off a tag by running and stomping over Stevie on his way to knock Booker off the apron. To the shock of everybody, Booker wins this with a shitty looking kick.

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My Favorite Wrestling: WCW Pro 3/30/96

1. State Patrol vs. Harlem Heat

Awwwww yeah this is what I'm talking about! Harlem Heat have aged pretty horribly in retrospect, but State Patrol are one of the great lost teams of the 90s. Buddy Lee will take and deliver a beating and Harlem Heat will deliver an awkward 1996 beating. Both guys in HH were really sloppy around this time, and while that can derail other matches it kind of added to it here. At one point Stevie Ray gives Buddy Lee an accidental shoot brainbuster. It was supposed to be a suplex that Parker reverses into a crossbody, but Ray just drops him straight down. Ouch. How much of State Patrol's AJPW tours made tape? Also why did they make James Earl Wright's name so close to a famous murderer's name? Was Joe Wilkes Boothe tossed around, too?

2. Giant vs. Southern Posse

Always get stoked for some Southern Posse, or as I assume they were known backstage, "Sonny Trout and the ugly one". I always get unrealistically excited for a Southern Posse match, but I'm not sure if they're actually any good. They both look scuzzy, the announcers never know their names so they always just call each guy "southern posse" ("The Giant with a big slam on southern posse!"), one of them got a HJ at a Molly Hatchett concert*, just something about them I always get excited about. Rachel was stunned at how slim the Giant was.

3. Mark Starr vs. Ric Flair

I miss these kind of syndicated matches, where Flair would show tons of ass and give guys like Mark Starr 70/30, and then cheat to beat fucking Mark Starr. All the fanny-packed women in the crowd get all riled up and it's always an enjoyable 4 minutes. It's also odd thinking that current Mark Starr probably is living better than current Ric Flair from a quality-of-life perspective. Starr is likely at a nearby lake having some beers and doing some wakeboarding as I type this, whereas Flair is a sad, melty mess not being able to cover his tab at Q104's Summerfest.

4. Lifeguard Steve Collins vs. Bunkhouse Buck

I'll level with you, I have never heard of Lifeguard Steve Collins. You know who else hasn't heard of him? Bunkhouse Buck, so he proceeds to kick the shit out of Lifeguard Steve Collins for getting into his ring. Collins is some sort of Baywatch gimmick, wearing real awkward red swim shorts that are loose and pulled up real high. Fuller and Buck cheat like assholes and Buck was a beast here, with great punches and stomps. Great moment when Buck steps aside from a Collins dropkick, then bounces off the ropes and just lambasts with an amazing dropkick. And then, he gets the pin fall after just stomping on Collins' face. Collins was on his back, Buck bounced off the ropes, slowed down and just stomped his face --> pinfall. Then after the match Buck and Parker beat Collins with his red floatation device and choked him some more. It was all I wanted and more.

5. Hugh Morrus vs. Scott Armstrong

These Hugh Morrus squashes just aren't that good. Armstrong is going to be one of the unsung heroes of syndicated WCW. But there's not much to do to make Morrus matches fun. If you would have asked for a 8 word guess on how the match went, it would have been "Armstrong bumps big, Morrus misses moonsault, pins anyway." It would have been right.

6. Robert Eaton/Dave Taylor vs. American Males

Not the ideal opponents, but you can put Eaton and Taylor into the ring with two sacks of leaves and I'd still be entertained by Eaton's punches and Taylor's throws. And those things ruled here. Taylor had a powerslam that might have been one of the most amazing things I've seen in a ring. It was a powerslam that went straight up overhead from a dead lift and ended with a float over. It was downright Karelinesque. I don't think there was anything Riggs could have done to prevent it, either. If he was fighting it with every fiber of his being, he was getting slammed. Also, I'm going to say it: Bobby Eaton knows how to fake punch a man better than almost any other man. You heard it here first.

*probably

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My Favorite Wrestling: WCW Worldwide 12/10/95

Sting vs. Manny Fernandez

Talk about your let downs, but this was not THEE Manny Fernandez. The prospect of a 1995 Manny Fernandez opening match ass beating was instead rinsed down the drain by a pudgy guy who took Sting's offense, and that offense was just OK. I wish they had at least given this Manny Fernandez a nickname like "Boxcar Bertha" or something.

Bunkhouse Buck/Dick Slater vs. Scott & Steve Armstrong

Buck/Slater were so awesome as a pair of dirty prospectors. Just them doing their thing is so fun and the Armstrongs are good foils for them. This match probably could have had zero offense from either team, just Armstrongs getting the crowd pumped up while Buck/Slater jawed with the crowd, and then ended in a time limit draw, and I'd be like "This felt like a ***1/2 match."

Diamond Dallas Page vs. Buck Quartermaine

This doesn't get much time, but I don't think DDP was very good then anyway. It's kind of shocking how good he got in just a couple years. And two guys named Buck on the same show, one match apart? I assume the fans were confused, but would have been less so had he been named Milton Quartermaine.

Dungeon of Doom promo

Good lord the Dungeon of Doom. Zodiac was just running around screaming over everybody's promo, King Curtis was spilling out of his robe (just teasing you with a bunch of side boob), then Taskmaster gave his father the gift of laughter (the gift being Hugh Morrus), and I have no idea what is going on here. And they're in a cave.

Hugh Morrus vs. Joey Maggs

You know what? This wasn't actually very good. But...

Chris Benoit vs. Big Train Bart

FUUUUUUCK Yeah! Benoit vs. Big Train Bart (whom you know as Black Bart!) was fuuuuucking killer. Bart stiffs the shit out of Benoit and also bumps HUGE for him. He take a big clothesline to the floor, catches a great dive, and just really puts over Benoit's strikes. When he takes over the offense, he transitions with HEADBUTTS and they are some GREAT headbutts. THEN he starts working over Benoit's fingers! He grabs Benoit's fingers and pulls them down over the top rope (wedging the rope into the webbing) and I have NEVER seen someone do that. While he's doing this, he's headbutting Benoit in the shoulder. So awesome. This is the man who trained Necro Butcher! And he's wrestling Benoit in his late 40s!! Did YOU know that Black Bart worked WCW TV in the 90s, wearing overalls and headbutting the shit out of murderers!? I did not, but thank you TV for showing it to me! You just picture -- right now -- Chris Benoit and Necro Butcher having it out in the middle of a bunch of families who are watching wrestling at an amusement park because they wanted to beat the heat indoors and rest their dogs for an hour....How can that be anything but 9 stars? Probably the best WCW syndicated match I've seen yet.

Steven Regal/Robert Eaton vs. Harlem Heat

The main event is going nicely until the Robert Parker/Sherri storyline took center stage, then we have Eaton getting the visible pin for EVER, like a 16 count, until Stevie kicks him off and then Eaton just gets pinned. Started strong and then just sputtered to the end. Shame. The more I watch, the more I think Harlem Heat is a really bad team. I think people automatically think they're a good team just because they last a long time, but they often looked downright bad in the ring. Stevie Ray always looked bad, but I don't think people remember how Booker looked in the ring before that series with Benoit in '98, and those miracle matches with Saturn and Martel.

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