Brian Kendrick Really Gotta Bite

Brian Kendrick vs. Kyle O'Reilly QPW 2/1/14 - REALLY GOOD

ER: I really liked this. Kendrick is not wrestling like his CWC self, but he's good at doing what he's doing. O'Reilly can be annoying, but he's less annoying in this match (except for the parts where he's really annoying). The opening lock ups were really fun, much different from the Catch Point style that we've been getting used to over the last year plus, this was more exaggerated and showy, but still tough; a lot of bullying around and nice strength tests, but played large. O'Reilly works a snug side headlock and they do some fun work around that (though get a little too cute with a loop of missed splash/slip out of headlock). Kendrick commits to things in fun ways, like flinging his whole body into an armdrag but spinning himself into the mat because O'Reilly held onto the ropes. The best parts are when Kendrick starts yanking on O'Reilly's arm, bending and twisting and working some nasty holds. At one point he picks up the arm by the wrist and just stomps it to the mat. All the arm work was killer. And O'Reilly is good at selling it, in the moment. But it kind of predictably gets dropped, and shoot O'Reilly even wins with his own armbar using his MY ARM arm. O'Reilly is just frustrating as hell, as a lot of his simple grappling looks good. I really loved his headlock variations, the standing one, the bulldog choke he locks on, but he does too much klutzy Johnny Saint kind of stuff, with leapfrogs and crawling between legs and most of it looks bad. His repertoire needs a trimming. Some of that stuff could of derailed things, but I think it points to Kendrick's strengths that he was able to take the stuff straight and not let things devolve. Overall I thought it was really satisfying despite O'Reilly's faults, but the potential was there for this to be really great.

Brian Kendrick/Noam Dar vs. Sin Cara/Rich Swann (WWE Raw 11/7/16) - FUN

Kind of a waste of 4 minutes. Kendrick isn't really a major part of the match as he does a little cheating behind the ref's back, but for the most part it's the Noam Dar show. I get it, they're in Scotland and shoot if you're going to use Dar then use him in Scotland. But the guy isn't ready for prime time. He'll throw a nice kick to the shins or a nice uppercut, but it will be offset by really bad strike combos and cutesy horseshit. This match was more about a nice little Sin Cara statement performance. Cara has been a man with no place on the roster for some time, and even him in the Cruiser division seems a TNAish move for both sides (Cruisers get a guy with a "not a star" stigma suddenly treated like a star, Cara gets demoted and has to be cool with it) but if he comes into the division with this attitude then I'm game. Him deadlifting Dar in a powerbomb was cool and then him breaking out the rolling senton to the floor was sick. Match had zero build and ended sudden, but it had a couple moments.

Brian Kendrick vs. Sin Cara (WWE Raw 11/14/16) - FUN

If asked several months ago if I thought Brian Kendrick would be getting 10+ minute matches on Raw, nobody would have seen that coming. So here he is, and it's weird and kind of awesome. But it's also been just kinda hung right out to fucking dry. Here he gets a long match on Raw, right before Brock and Godlberg are set to come out and be all big buff not cruiserweights. So this match gets a ton of time, and the crowd predictably treats it like they've gone to see their favorite band and they're now enduring an awful unannounced opener. There were plenty of cool things buried in here, even as the crowd was openly shitting on it. Cara had a great showing last week and sadly didn't really have that aggression this week. Our dreams of Cara shooting on live TV are quickly vanishing. But Kendrick dishes out some fun hockey punches and short knees, and takes a big bump to the floor to set up a nice Cara dive. I love how Kendrick smashes himself into the ring barrier. And later this sets up Cara getting ole'd into that barrier on a second attempt. Loved Kendrick's big bump to the floor off a clothesline. Kendrick takes all of Cara's offense nicely and is overly generous, really letting Cara show off his moveset. Nice northern lights, tilt a whirl backbreaker, springboard back elbow. really he kind of owns the last several minutes. Finish is an awesome modern Kendrick touch, with him getting desperate and twisting Cara's mask sideways (hinted at a bit earlier when he was yanking at it) and locking on the bully choke. Finish was really cool but the announce team was shitty during it, really reading it wrong and calling it in bizarre dead Owen voice like it was a grave tragedy. "Look at the mask of Sin Cara, look at how Kendrick twisted it," said in these weird somber tones. Shame.


COMPLETE MODERN BRIAN KENDRICK

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WWE Hell in a Cell 2016 Not Live Blog

1. Sin Cara, Lince Dorado & Cedric Alexander vs. Tony Nese, Drew Gulak & Ariya Daivari

ER: This match left me pretty hollow, really didn't think a lot of the guys in this looked good. Gulak looked the best, loved his subs working over Lince. Him locking the deathlock, fighting with him over his arms, all that looked great. The match started getting good right after the big dive train. The dives happened and back in the ring Gulak grabbed a dragon sleeper real smooth on Cedric. There was a great fight spot over it, with Nese holding Cara's foot on the floor, and Lince coming out of nowhere with the save. We get some fun moves trading, Nese looked stumbly, and the lumbar check somehow always ends up looking good. It seems preposterous, but man does it look painful.

I had that New Day Q&A segment on in the background while I typed up that Cruiser match, and my goodness that was bad. They just yelled the whole time.

2. Rusev vs. Roman Reigns

ER: So they went really long with this one. Probably too long. And it really could have used blood. But overall it was good. It started to get real good when Reigns missed his sliding kick on the apron and Rusev hit a lariat. Once weapons got in their I really suckered in. Rusev bashing Reigns in the ropes with the kendo stick was great, although after he broke it over his knee I started rooting for him to stab him with the stick, Abby style. Things would have gotten so damn real with a kendo stick stabbing. I thought Rusev was on point the entire match. His punches looked way better than Roman's (except for the first time Roman caught him with the chain, then Roman was throwing bombs), and all of his kicks looked great. Roman ran forehead and nose first into one of those, and I thought for sure he was gonna get up with a black eye. The chain spots looked good and that sub with the chain through Roman's mouth was great. So yeah, plenty of great stuff in this one, but they were also given an insane amount of time to do the great stuff. Overall win.

3. Bayley vs. Dana Brooke

ER: Eh this was okay. I actually liked Brooke more than Bayley in this one, which was not something I expected. Dana's the one that got me into it, the moment she kick Bayley's arm in the ropes. All the arm work was really good, her lariat looked really good, and suddenly I liked small powerhouse Dana Brooke. Bayley firing back with her one good arm was nice, but the end felt too sudden and convenient.

4. Enzo & Big Cass vs. Luke Gallows & Karl Anderson

ER: Surprising result, but this was pretty bleh. One of Anderson's better WWE performances, though, so that leaves me mixed. Enzo and Cass just are not good. Cass' big boot usually looks good. But even Test had a bit more going for him than his good big boot. Gallows superkicking Enzo was satisfying, and I did like Enzo's crossbody earlier, but this was flat for me.

5. Kevin Owens vs. Seth Rollins

ER: This was actually my favorite match with these guys. It also got tons of time, but I think that actually made it feel more epic in scope. I think this was the tightest that Rollins has looked in WWE. The strike segments weren't "hold my hair and swing in a phone booth" things that Owens has been spamming, it was just an old fashioned punch exchange. And Rollins looked good in it, really throwing them at all angles. Owens worked in some cool stuff like flying hard into cannonballs (including a brutal one into the cell) and then later splatting Rollins with a couple nasty sentons. One of them hit while Rollins was on all fours, and damn that just hurts my wrists and elbows thinking about it. Rollins muscling up Owens with a powerbomb was nuts, and even though the tables were set up for it, I still didn't think anybody was going through that table structure. But hot damn did Owens get powerbombed through it. Nuts. Owens' chairshots were among the most violent I've ever seen, he really looked like he was laying Rollins out. They weren't landing flush, Rollins was catching some edge, they were thrown to his ribs and arm and stomach, really nasty shots. So yeah, this match felt appropriately violent to justify the time given. Much better than I hoped.

6. TJ Perkins vs. Brian Kendrick

ER: A good match but I think they have better in them. I do love that they're working long real time injury spots into matches thanks to Kendrick. It feels like if Chris Hamrick were suddenly a guy they cared about. But Kendrick does a great long convincing knee injury, always knowing it would end with him jumping TJ. I still wasn't actually expecting the Kendrick win, even though I love it. They've kinda treated TJ like a wet noodle since this whole cruisers on Raw thing happened. Some fan in the front row manages to insult both men in one breath with a "Get a fucking haircut hippie. Nike sucks!" One man, raging against the system. I love how dangerous they have made the captains hook look, almost always a guaranteed win. But this felt like it needed a bit more build.

7. New Day vs. Cesaro/Sheamus

ER: This felt long and I actually think the match benefitted from the slow spots. I liked Big E and Cesaro selling how damn tired they were. I really liked Cesaro and Sheamus cutting off Woods. They were pretty vicious to him in the corner, with both seeing who could throw a harder uppercut. The rolling senton into Cesaro's double stomp. That's finisher level nasty. Cesaro catching Woods' running leg and turning it into a sharpshooter was slick and vicious as all hell. I really wanted it to be the finish. In a way it was, but they get cute and DQ Kofi for interference. But this was a real good Sheamus/Cesaro performance, and a nice New Day showing. The ending was kinda annoying, but match was solid.

8. Charlotte vs. Sasha Banks

ER: Well hot damn I loved this. This felt epic, this had some gravitas. Charlotte jumping her before the bell was awesome, and both of them beat the hell out of each other around ringside. Sasha showed real fire when prepping the table, and you knew something bad was happening. But I somehow didn't guess powerbomb. Sasha got planted with that powerbomb, sprawled across the collapsing table fantastically. I loved the lonnnnnnng stretcher set up. It was taking forever, but I loved it. Every minute that went by made it look like Sasha had more and more of a chance to recover. That powerbomb was nasty but juuuuuust maybe...so when she gets off the stretcher and slaps the hell out of an EMT, I was way into it. And they had a real assbeating fight. Sasha flew into her with knees, Charlotte landed kicks, they laced right into each other. There was a certain sloppiness that actually added to the gritty fight feel, totally made the match. I had no idea who would win, no clue where it would go, was constantly waiting for a swerve of some kind. But the table coming in, Sasha getting tossed all over it, ragdolling into and off of it, felt like a really violent human breaking move. The whole match felt like a big deal (which is annoying to type after how much I know they're going to pat themselves on the back because HISTORY), and they shocked the hell out of me. I thought they would work stupid to justify their spot in the main event, but I thought they were smart in this - even with a couple crazy spots. Awesome match.

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NXT 230 7/10/14 Review

1. Bayley vs. Summer Rae

This is just about the most natural of personality match-ups, as Bayley is inherently likeable, whereas Summer Rae has a face of someone who should never be booked as likeable. It's pretty basic, and both are good at what they do. Bayley is good at frustrating Summer with her kind of playful sloppiness when doing amateur rolls on the mat (with Summer hilariously kicking her legs in a tantrum), and Summer does mean unnecessary things like palm Bayley's face during pinfalls. Neither thing would make a victory more likely, but they were perfect character moments that illustrated why this was a nice match-up. Albert is back on commentary and as awful as ever, unable to make satisfying points from a logic or kayfabe perspective. "She didn't get all of that kick!" he was quick to blurt over everybody, after a Summer kick that mostly hit fine and was sold as such. After saying Summer earned a title shot because she was in a movie, he then compares her to Trish Stratus. None of his points make sense within a storyline or any other sense, his allegiances switch mid match, he's just really really bad at his job. Sometimes he goes for comedy, other times he supports a heel, none of it lands. But Bayley/Summer is a fun match and Albert is NOT going to ruin it for me! Summer is someone who really wasn't utilized much on the main roster as a wrestler, which is a shame as she's really not bad, and has more personality than most. Her role on Total Divas has made me laugh more than most on that show. And here I liked the struggle over the finish, with Summer blocking the Bayley to Belly a couple times before planting her with her axe leg drop. So far all the people coming back to NXT after a "demotion" have been really fun and nicely integrated into the existing NXT roster.

2. Sin Cara vs. Wesley Blake

I think I may be the biggest Wesley Blake fan. I like keeping mostly out of the present day NXT loop, so it's fun watching and enjoying a guy like Blake and not knowing what is going to happen to him. Maybe he's released before 2014, maybe he's repackaged and super popular now. My only real insight into NXT beyond the stuff I've watched so far, is the guys who show up on WWE TV. I obviously know guys like Aiden English, sadly Big Cass, sadly Mojo Rawley, etc. will continue to be in these reports because they eventually made the main roster. But a guy like Blake? I have no clue, and that's fun for me. Blake is really good at constructing 3 minute matches, with him on the losing end. Cara is in to hit all his shit, and it can't be a coincidence that this was the best I've seen some of Cara's spots look. Blake got into position for runs of Cara offense better than anybody I've seen on the main roster, ate those springboard crossbodys, took a huge bump over the top and then sprawled big into the entrance ramp catching a dive. For his part he made his brief moments count, blasting Cara with a great uppercut and surprising him (and me) with an even greater right hand. His single arm DDT was swank and lead to him stomping the arm and yanking on it, and Cara was kind enough to sell it for him. Super fun match, did tons with the time. I think with 90 more seconds this would land on my "Recommended NXT" list.

They're kind of bonering up this Tyson Kidd bitter vet angle with the inclusion of Nattie. Kidd as the dickhead falling from grace relegated to developmental vet? Awesome. Nattie asking him about his moral compass? Death. Unless it's building to a Nattie heel swerve, her presence is just muddying waters. We already see them on Total Divas and know they're essentially a normal married couple, her inclusion tries to bring too much real life into a great wrestling angle, and it's coming out worse on the other side. They're overthinking this thing.

CJ Parker comes out to offer a somewhat loaded apology to Xavier Woods, and "I'm offering you peace. I suggest you accept it," is a quote that perfectly nails the annoying heel nuance of Parker's character. The manipulative dirt fuck hippy is a great heel character, and Parker gets the finer points correct. A guy who makes good points but has a smug and self righteous way of delivering those points is the kind of character who works great on a show like this, and something that would get immediately clipped to hell on the main brand. On Smackdown he would just be a hippy heel, and the crowd would just be expected to boo him because he's a hippy. His apology to Xavier is somewhat sincere and that's what makes him jumping Xavier even better.

3. Bull Dempsey vs. Angelo Dawkins
At first all three announcers were laying it on real thick about Dempsey's body, really putting over that he's unique because he doesn't have abs. Just within this match it was already making me want to dislike Dempsey, and that's crazy if any of you know how much I love fat wrestlers. And yeah having a guy who looks like Dempsey on your roster is much more rare these days, but announcers didn't have to point out just how fat Blackwell or One Man Gang or Tenta were, because they were clearly big awesome fat dudes. And maybe that's part of the problem with Dempsey, is that they're spending so much time talking about how unique his round physique is, but truthfully he's not that far away from being in fine cosmetic shape. Those other guys either died fat or - in the case of OMG - spent the last 20 years slowly slimming down so that he now suddenly looks like Richard Moll. Dempsey looks like a guy who can go on a 6 month crossfit binge and look like a hairier version of every other physique in NXT. So it comes off like them trying hard to point out just how unique he is, because the thing that they say is unique isn't really special. He comes off more as an out of shape guy than a wild fat guy. The guy needs to pack on another 50 lb. to actually look wrestler fat. BUT. But. Eventually everybody shuts up, and I can just enjoy Dempsey beating up Dawkins, and that is very enjoyable. While he might not totally live up to how they're billing him, he comes off very well in the ring. Loved him turning a Dawkins' armdrag into a slick side headlock, his body shots are great, his elbows are great, really carries himself like a tank throughout the whole thing. He's a guy I would have liked anyway, without all of the spoon feeding from the announce crew. This match was basically a Dempsey showcase, but also gave us by far our longest look at Angelo Dawkins. We've seen him get zero offense against Big Cass, zero offense against Tyler Breeze, and not even get tagged in against the Vaudevillains. We know he's tall. That's about what we know. But this match filled things in a bit! He took a nice beating from Bull, threw an insanely high dropkick, seemed like a guy you wouldn't mind seeing more from; another guy like Wesley Blake who for all I know was never used again after this taping. I'm excited to see where he and Bull go, and I liked all of what I saw here from both.


4. Sami Zayn & Adrian Neville vs. Justin Gabriel & Tyson Kidd
I was really liking this, even through a couple of clunky Kidd cross-ups, but Natalya's involvement in the veteran dickhead Tyson Kidd story is just the pits. She's a lousy actress, and there were too many moments where she acted all over the place. She's too over the top when she's supposed to be subtle, and I just really wish the storyline had not included her. Unless it leads to a Natalya NXT heel turn, which it probably won't. But I enjoy heel Natalya far more. But I really this was just a straight up tag with two demoted assholes up against a couple top NXT guys. That's all that this needed, the simpler approach. Is there anybody watching out there that would see that tag, and then go "I liked it, but I wish the tag could have furthered some sort of collapsing marriage storyline." It's always a bummer when a person not in the match takes a match you would recommend, and makes it less recommendable. That's Natalya's tombstone right there : "Made Things Less Recommendable". Zayn and Neville are a fun babyface tag team, wouldn't mind seeing both utilized currently this way. It's not like they do tons of double teams (outside of a nutty sky twister press that Neville did off a kneeling Zayn), they just complement each other nicely; just as, Gabriel and Kidd complement each other nicely. Kidd has been a standout as a heel, though he had a couple stumbles in this one. Gabriel turned in one of his better performances though, he's also a guy who makes a better heel than face. And so this was a real nice 10 minute tag, something I easily could have added to the recommended NXT list. But Natalya man. Natalya as TJ's moral compass is just awful.


COMPLETE NXT EPISODE GUIDE

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WWE Elimination Chamber 2015 Live Blog

Been a while since we did one of these, EC is usually my favorite WWE gimmick match, and while I don't know the card outside of Cena/Owens, I'm stoked.

1. Zack Ryder vs. Stardust

ER: This was on the kickoff show, and man I'm glad I rewound to see what I missed. Who could have missed out on a Ryder match!!?? They had a pretty tidy little 6 minute match, didn't make me regret watching it. I don't understand one iota of the Stardust character, but I like Cody as a wrestler more than most people, it would seem. I like the little things he adds to moves, takes a couple extra steps that others don't. For his reverse roll the dice finisher I dug how he pinched Ryder with a nerve hold to make him drop a bit to put him in better position to do the move. Most guys would just awkwardly and cooperatively bend the guy back right out of the gate. Ryder has some decent stuff in this, really liked his dropkick off the apron. Fun little match.

ER: Just saw Macho Mandow and Axelmania for the first time and.....wow. The last thing on my TV with less legs was Oscar Pistorius (take that Pistorius! I knew we'd get some use out of the 2011 Unused Segunda Caida Joke Folder).

2. New Day vs. Los Matadores vs. Lucha Dragons vs. Ascension vs. Cesaro/Kidd vs. Prime Time Players

PAS: Kind of mess, but a fun mess. Loved Cesaros tribute to Nick Gage face wrap, just kind of made me wish Nick Gage was in this match. Rey was always the king of these Elimination Chamber matches, and Kalisto is no Rey, he kept climbing and almost falling. He kind of looked like Homicide when almost fell off a cage on the first Monday TNA show. Really liked the couple of crazy El Torito dives, probably should have left the highspots to him. Match probably could have used Rowan and Harper, they would have been way better then the bush league Ascension (as would the H8 Club, hey WWE sign Nick Gage) in the role of team who cleans house before the main event run. Really liked the New Day v. PTP section, Titus was wrecking people, and the PTP flew around for him. Finish with everyone chopping him down was really cool. Would have loved this back last year when the tag division was really killing it, think about how much better this would have been with Rhodes Brothers, Wyatt Family and Shield.

ER: Out of all the teams that could have started this match I must say that Ascension was right at the bottom of my wishlist. If we started with Cesaro/Kidd opposite the Dragons they could have done some big things. They've been tearing up TV lately. I love Torito standing on top of the Matadores pod, like a little gargoyle. Sin Cara's swanton off the pod was impressive but took forever to set up, and then Kalisto sold on the New Day's pod for days. But we got a wild Cesaro uppercut and superplex out of it at least. I thought the Kalisto spot was awesomely goofy, much better than Homicide literally getting stuck at the top of the TNA mouse trap cage. I was hoping Kalisto would just spider cling to the top of the cage for the whole match. It would have been the greatest twist on the old "Jimmy Hart hiding under the ring during the battle royal". The strength to climb upside down like that is just nuts. Serious question: have there ever been more than 5 black dudes in a WWE ring at once? New Day vs. PTP may have made history, people. It depends how many members the Nation had and if they ever went up against a team featuring Ahmed Johnson. Overall I thought this match was pretty bad, really disjointed. I think New Day looked pretty awful, although most of that was Kofi. I don't think the tag team chamber concept worked very well. It just leaves too many guys in the ring and too much waiting around for spots to happen.

ER: Rusev is apparently out with a broken foot so WHO will replace him in the chamber?! I'm hoping for Savio Vega myself.

3. Nikki Bella vs. Naomi vs. Paige

PAS: This is not the WWE Women's wrestling everyone is talking about right? Awkard mess of a match with a couple of nice potatoes by Nikki Bella, and some really awkward bumps on the head. Kind of reminded me of a IWA-MS rookie match where meth-heads would try puro moves they couldn't do to impress Ian Rotten. Didn't look like something that belonged on a professional stage.

ER: I don't think a 3 way dance is going to make anybody look that good, so I personally wouldn't rush to judge the "new and improved" Divas division. Also, Naomi works much better as a face. She had a great face moveset. Her heel stuff isn't nearly as good, though the Rear View while Nikki had Paige in a fireman's carry was nice. Ending was super awkward with the botched reverse rana and then Nikki just hitting her finish. I've seen all three women look way better, and yeah, 3 ways stink.

4. Kevin Owens vs. John Cena

PAS: Man Cena may be the best indy dream match worker ever. He is really great at putting over the ROH roster. Owens deserves a ton of credit, the trash talking and stiffness really added a ton to the Cena formula, and I loved that crazy throw off the top rope, and his almost package piledriver. It has been a long time since every WWE main event was guys doing their opponents finisher, so those spots were still novel, and fit nicely with what Owens was trying to do. Cena is a master of working his formula, like Flair or Santo or Choshu he can plug someone in, and let them provide the flourishes. I thought there was a decent chance of Owens going over, but clean as a sheet in the middle of ring was a bit of a surprise. Wouldn't think a guy who according to my wife looks like a slightly fitter Kevin Smith, would be the indy guy who would get the full push, but it seems to be working.

ER: I really love matches where Cena works from under, as he's really great at taking moves (that DDT with him bumping it the way Christian used to bump DDTs??) and selling. So him vs. modern indie workers is a pretty satisfying match up since many of these guys have large movesets. It's a trip seeing Cena take all these big indie moves and it's so obvious he would be colossally over in PWG or Evolve. Owens was put in a big spot here as he controlled like 80% of this and always knew what he was doing next, always building to things, and his execution was spot on throughout. Owens going over clean in the middle was awesome and I will always love shocked and said cutaways to fans in the crowd. Steen broke out tons of cool things and I loved Cena's little comebacks: him grabbing Owens' leg when Owens was mocking him with the fistdrop, dropping butt first on Owens from the top, Owens leaning face first into a Cena lariat, and I really really love Cena's springboard stunner. It's kinda goofy, but I think it works and is a good addition to Cena's moveset. It's still wild to see Steen in the ring, still looking like Steen, gym shorts and a sleeveless T, wrestling exactly like Steen. Just not something I thought would happen, and I couldn't be happier that it is. Great showing from both guys here, really every step of the way in the match.

5. Bo Dallas vs. Neville

ER: Boy "Neville" has to be the stupidest example of WWE shortening names to one word. Who would want to buy a shirt that just said "Neville"? And boy this was a dud. Bo Dallas has come back to absolutely no heat, and people did not care to watch him for 8 minutes. Him working his schtick to total silence is uncomfortable, like when a SNL sketch is really dying. Neville obviously has some cool offense but one minute in he's already hitting a chinlock. Dallas took a nice bump to the post, but seemed to gas real early. This was not worthy of being on the PPV. Stardust/Neville would have matched up better, then Dallas could have been relegated to the kickoff show.

6. R Truth vs. Sheamus vs. Ryback vs. Mark Henry vs. Wade Barrett vs. Dolph Ziggler

PAS: Oof what a mess. We had some ok big man brawling and Ziggler bumping, but the match completely fell apart when Sheamus couldn't get out of his pod. You would think veterans would be better at improv-ing. Always happy to see Mark Henry, but he didn't do a ton here. When Sheamus got in he beat on some folks, but this was long off the rails by then. They did some tired Ziggler v. Sheamus counter wrestling, and a Sheamus v. Ryback section, which was really nasty but weirdly paced. I can't ever remember seeing an Elimination chamber this bad.

ER: WHY WAS THIS SO BAD!? I have seen Chamber matches with far worse guys than this, and I believe this was the only chamber matched I've ever actively disliked. God this was boring. That Sheamus stuff was laaaaame. Especially since we've seen guys break out of their pods before, and we've seen pods get broken by guys getting thrown into them. But there's Sheamus, lightly smacking the pod with his palms and begging refs to let him out. Just kick the fucking thing down, man! This whole thing was worked half speed. Watch Ryback feebly pump his arm while the crowd tepidly mumbles "Feed Me More". Everybody lies around, other times people just stand watching each other.  Dolph flew into some stuff the way Dolph can fly into stuff, Henry as the replacement could have been a big moment but he hardly did anything and also spent tons of time just lying on the apron, waiting. A lot of times guys would be lying around selling after not even taking offense. They would do a move to somebody else and then get out of the way, but couldn't think of a better way to get out of the way than lying on the side breathing heavily. Cole says "Sheamus has never won the IC championship, says it's on his bucket list!" and just picturing anybody saying that winning the IC title is on their "bucket list" makes me laugh, but in a sad kinda way. Just imagine Sheamus cutting a promo going down a checklist "Kiss a girl at the top of the Empire State Building", "Tour the Old Bushmills Distillery""Win the IC Championship". Ryback, Sheamus and Henry looked like somebody ground up a bunch of Somas into their protein shakes. Ryback's powerbomb into the ring on Sheamus looked good, but man this really was the worst Chamber match ever.

ER: I'm taking a break before the main to watch Grace Helbig. My spirits need to be lifted in some way.

7. Seth Rollins vs. Dean Ambrose

ER: This Corpus Christi crowd has been silent death almost the whole night. The only thing Corpus is good for is going fishing, and making sure you get yourself seen around town while a shady P.I. back home is murdering your estranged wife and her lover/your bar employee. I wasn't feeling this match BEFORE they went to some throwback Malenko/Guerrero 2 counts (is there any move sequence that needs a retirement more than that?) but they brought me back in with that Ambrose dive and both tumbling over the table. But then they lose me again by doing a stretch where they kept going for pins after each move. We still get some nice moments, like Rollins bumping the rebound lariat, and Ambrose hitting his wild elbow to the floor on Rollins' goons, but this just never gelled for me. I think TV length singles matches just seem to work best for some of these guys. This was maybe my least favorite Ambrose singles match in a year, and I just typed that BEFORE they announced the fucking horrible finish. Oh man. Fuck this show (props to Owens/Cena though, a nice little gem hidden in a massive pile of shit).

PAS: Yeah this wasn't very good, this went the extra 10 minutes that the Owens v. Cena matches avoided. It really felt like those guys were trying to work a PWG match which really sucks when you are just waiting around for the bad finish to happen. I really liked the tope and some of the bumping, but it all felt formless and meaningless. A straight Dusty Finish did make me kind of nostalgic honestly. They should have brought out Tommy Young just for the hell of it.

ER: Hopefully Silicon Valley and Veep continue to deliver tonight, just so something doesn't feel like a massive waste of time for me tonight.

NOTE** Cena/Owens was good enough to nab a spot on our 2015 MOTY list, so I'll just go ahead and link to that:

2015 MOTY MASTER LIST

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NXT Episode 207 Workrate Report 2/5/14

So I am almost 100% unfamiliar with the NXT goings on. 207 episodes!? How the hell is that even possible?? Have I literally missed 4 years of NXT? Or does it work like weird TV season numbers and this is just the 7th episode of season 2. But yeah, I have haven't seen much of NXT, is what I'm getting at. I've seen the occasional Hero or Ambrose match and that's about it. Never watched a full episode, but I like the fact that exists in its own little bubble, in the same way that Saturday Night or WorldWide used to exist. So in a way this is like WWE B-Sides. I still wish there was a show like Velocity, but this is probably the next best version of that. So, what the hell, let's start reviewing NXT weekly shows!

1. Sin Cara vs. Alexander Rusev

First time seeing Rusev here. I dig the guy's old school powerlifter build. He....doesn't seem that good. But I'm not shocked that he's getting brought up to the main roster. He's not very good at hitting his marks. Cara had to shove him into position at one point when he was taking too long, and he backed too far away from a Cara moonsault press so it ended up hitting him like a backflip dropkick instead. His offense is pretty dry, with mostly power stuff and some random kicks peppered in. He did do a running dropkick at one point that looked really great, really felt like a John Tenta style dropkick. He works this match too evenly, and at one point holds Cara in an armlock for far too long. I get that most short WWE matches need to have that pointless moment where the heel holds a face in some sort of a rest hold to build for the comeback, but it felt more pointless than usual here. Needs more impressive power spots. Plus his average height will be exposed when on the main roster.

2. Alicia Fox vs. Emma

Fox has been the best Diva for some time now, does all "between moves" stuff a lot better than most Divas (and plenty of male workers). Nice stomach kicks, actually makes restholds look like she's working a hold, really nasty wristlocks that looks like she's manipulating joints, cool reckless forearms from the mount. Emma does not seem very good, and I'm already starting to turn on her as she's getting mostly tepid responses but announcers on the main brand and now NXT are putting her over as somebody the crowd just goes batty for and pretending more than 30 people in the crowd are doing her dance. Here she takes a year to do a reverse rolling cradle and just as long to try and set up the Tarantula. I do like her doing the Emma dance into her finisher submission, but most everything else she does doesn't look good.

3. Sylvester Lefort vs. Mason Ryan

Oh hey it's Mason Ryan. Forgot about him. This goes about 45 seconds but is done the way a squash match should be done. Dug Ryan's hotshot into a running big boot. Good follow through on the boot. Would have liked to see some more from Lefort as I dug his hiked-high tights and beard. His strikes didn't look very good though.

4. Aiden English vs. Tyson Kidd

English looks like tall muscular Screech, and when he's wearing that beret he looks like Screech from that Saved By the Bell episode where Screech was in a chess tournament, and Zack and Slater make a bunch of money by running a gambling ring to capitalize on Bayside's sudden and never-again-mentioned chess fever!! Kidd looks really good in this, missing a crossbody in the ropes, throwing nice kicks and doing a cool rana that sends English face first into the turnbuckles. Kidd gets the Blockbuster for the win after English is distracted by some guy named Big Cass who threatens to steal Screech's lucky beret. Couldn't get a great read on English but he threw some great Bret Hart style falling elbows.

5. Adrian Neville vs. Corey Graves

Neville used to be PAC (they still use his moniker The Man Gravity That Gravity Forgot) and Graves is the former Sterling James Keenan. Boy WWE developmental names leave a lot to be desired. Graves has a real good look, like an indie rock Chris Isaak. PAC's flying is always impressively effortless.  I cannot imagine having that much knowing control of my body. I mean I have alright balance and don't trip over my own legs when I go running, but seeing PAC hitting a running tope/moonsault press (picture what starts as a dive over the ropes but adds a twist in the middle to land like a moonsault press) is pretty stunning Most of this match is Graves working over Neville's leg, which he does well. I always like the DDT done to the leg, and he gets a real high cradle on roll ups. The guy looks like he has to actually kick out of pins, not just get let out. Neville is really great at selling the leg, too, which makes the leg work better. Crowd doesn't seem to give much of a shit though. Neville is still good at selling while doing his moves, which is not something you see often. He eventually makes his comeback and hits his killer twisting shooting star off the rope. I liked what happened in the match fine, everything looked solid. It wasn't terribly compelling, and it should have been. The story of "guy gets weapon taken away by wily opponent" usually gets people into it, but they certainly were not here. Now I know nothing of the history, or how the crowd normally responds to these two, but I would have expected them to be a little more receptive to this.


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