WWE Night of Champions 2015 Live Blog

ER: So I have watched maybe an hour total of WWE TV in the last couple months? I'm pretty uninterested in the product right now, which I don't think makes me very unique right now. As I understand it that's how many people feel right now. I mean as recently as last year I was DVRing Raw and Smackdown and watching all the PPVs, now I can't even remember the last time I watched Raw or Smackdown. Rachel watches Total Divas, but that is probably months behind actual current TV. So I don't know any of the current stories, don't know who current champions are, don't even really know the card. I'm basically going in blind. We'll see how that goes.

1. Cody Rodes/The Ascension vs. Neville/Lucha Dragons

ER: "You call them henchmen, I call them two dangerous cosmic dark horses", gawd fuck off Michael Cole. Boy, commercials during the pre-show match seem pretty pointless. And this match was nothing to blog about, that's for sure. The Ascension are still somehow a thing, Cody isn't very good without his brother, Dragons are really fun but seeing Ascension take their offense looks pretty ludicrous. Neville (arguably the worst ever "one word" WWE name ever) tags in towards the end and he and Cody don't seem to click very well. This was one forgettable TV match right here. Cole was abysmal throughout.

2. Ryback vs. Kevin Owens

ER: I thought this was really good. Steen goes after Ryback's arm and Ryback does an admirable job selling it throughout (loved little moments where he had it clutched tight to his body). Early we get a cool press slam spot with Owens taking a big drop to the floor. Steen trapping Ryback's arm and ramming it into the ringpost looked sick, Ryback really flew into it. Steen wrenched that left arm in a few painful looking ways, really bending it around. Ryback had some cool spots powering out of the arm work, and it didn't overstay its welcome. Finish was sort of cheap, but also really smartly set-up. Ryback had Steen up, Steen raked his eyes leading to a roll-up title win, but Steen smartly raked the eyes while the ref was behind him so it looked good. And I imagine it will lead to an immediate rematch (probably on Raw since they love doing that).

3. Dolph Ziggler vs. Rusev

ER: Oooooo we get some earring drama. God what has happened to this storyline? Match itself was really good with both guys bumping around for each other, Ziggler more obviously, a lot of big moves that hit, and then an amusing finish. Ziggler really flew into stuff, which is not very surprising if you've seen a Ziggler PPV match before. I was more surprised he leaned out of a Rusev boot before bumping off the apron into the railing. Rusev has a great looking spin kick. I dug how quick all of this was worked, and I actually dug Summer Rae's involvement. She throws her high heel and banks it right off Rusev's face (announcers speculated she was trying to hit the ref, but I have no idea what this storyline is so who knows what she was doing), but Rusev really got a shoe banked off his head which lead to Ziggler hitting the Zig Zag. Disappointed nobody said "Summer turned heel".

Between them using replay to show how Steen raked the eyes away from the ref, and how Dolph had his head smack off the mat, I have to give huge credit to whomever is directing this PPV. I've seen so many replays just expose something that looked good at normal speed, but tonight they're all specifically helping further get over the participants. There was a moment where Ziggler spikes him with a DDT and Rusev's head is clearly several inches off the mat, and I fully expected to see a replay of it, but they just moved on. Good work boys.

Between HD Terry Bradshaw and HD Ric Flair, I'm not sure which towheaded blonde good ol' boy is aging worse on my TV screen today.

4. New Day vs. Dudley Boyz (still going with that "z" spelling)

ER: As a jazz minor trombonist, I am 100% fully behind Xavier Woods using a trombone for ringside heat. Except it's clearly just getting them over as not heels. I had no idea the Dudleys were even back.  Quite the coup for WWE to nab the TNA hall of famers. Woods is kind of dangerously TOO "on" on the floor. He's got funny material ("they don't even have the same color camouflage, and I STILL can't see their legs), but he's kind of a constantly running faucet down there. He needs some more contained bursts. Here he's yelling during down time, but also yelling during the big moments of the match. It came off simultaneously entertaining, and more grating than Chris Tucker screaming his way through every second of Fifth Element. Director deserves more props for replaying Big E's nasty apron splash on Bubba Ray. That looked tough. Match itself was good. Dudleys still have gas in the tank, even D-von threw out some nice clotheslines (including a great flying one on Kofi), Kofi took a nice high backdrop, and (except for the limp finish) this was all super solid tag work.

5. Charlotte vs. Nikki Bella

ER: Charlotte has an impossibly non-existent butt. She's like Masa Chono. It's just lower back right down to legs. Charlotte apparently reminds JBL of Mildred Burke. Really? I guess he's seen tons of film footage from the 40s. Because obviously she's more of an Ed Strangler Lewis. I really liked this match, up until the finish. Nikki looked awesome here. Her leg work was really smart and well done, and she had a surprising amount of leg based offense. There was a great moment where Nikki kicked Charlotte's leg before suplexing her into the corner, then we had other cool stuff like a dragon screw from the apron to the floor. Nikki was relentless in this and was just all over Charlotte. But the finish kinda blew and really felt tacked on and totally independent of anything that had happened in the match. Nikki hardly took anything from Charlotte, but then Charlotte was able to effortlessly lock on her finisher, bridging up on her bum wheel for extra leverage. Felt like they suddenly had to go home and couldn't properly build to a real finish. Charlotte really doesn't do tons for me. Nikki however looked really really good. The strut postmatch was amusing but at this point I would be 100% fine with never seeing Flair on TV again. He just bums me out at this point.

6. Wyatt Family vs. Dean Ambrose, Roman Reigns, annnnnnnnnnnnnd Jericho

ER: Some guy in a flak jacket jumps into the ring when they're about to announce the mystery opponent, Bray was really great with a "Is that your guy!?" reaction. Dean was trying to hold back laughter and that's probably not what they wanted, but I'm amused. Michael Cole is in full desperation "What a moment!" selling Jericho's participation. JBL mentions Jericho working for "Riki Tenryu" as a junior heavyweight. Match itself was plenty of fun. I had never seen Strowman before and he was a kick. I'm kind of a sucker for big lugs and this guy is pretty mammoth. Really impressed me standing next to Harper. That is a team I wouldn't mind seeing more of. I loved Strowman's finisher as it really looked like he was squeezing the life out of Jericho. Jericho's legs dangling was a great visual, like fucking Darth Vader choking out a dude. Luke Harper is so damn good, he really should have been given the ball. These teams work together nicely and it always just serves to piss me off that they broke up both teams as we could still be in the middle of awesome trios, with some new members being added or cycled out.

No matches have blown me away this show,  but everything has been good (outside of the meh pre-show match, but technically that shouldn't count against a PPV).

7. John Cena vs. Seth Rollins

ER: Surprised they're running each Seth match back to back, but we'll see where it leads. His white get-up is both cool, but also like one chest piece away from him being the White Ranger. I wish white tights in WWE meant the same thing as white tights in lucha. I think Rollins hits a demonstrably worse Slingblade than Tanahashi. This match was fine. They did some stuff I really liked, some stuff I disliked. I liked Cena's rana off a running powerbomb, with Rollins taking a nasty bump into the buckles. The big move overkill Cena certainly had a short shelf life of enjoyability. I'd be more interested in these guys toning things down instead of this PWG stuff. Although one point in their favor is that the matches only go half the length of PWG matches. So yeah, this was overall fun and didn't overstay.

8. Seth Rollins vs. Sting

ER: So I have no interest in Sting, he's never been a guy I liked, rarely saw WCW growing up so don't have any sort of nostalgia for him. But I really loved this. This is probably more entertained than I've ever been by a Sting singles match. Once he took that wild bump into the announce table I was fully on board. Then Rollins takes that lunatic bump off the top into the barrier. Sting flies into the buckles on a powerbomb, then must be insane as he does a really great crossbody off the top to the floor. I mean that was a great crossbody right there. Just splatted right into Rollins. At this point the match was beyond just "worth watching", it was actively really good. But then I'm not sure what happened with the medic coming in. Maybe I missed something. They were speculating on him maybe getting hurt on that corner powerbomb. But we just sort of had a major stop to the match, which had to have been due to actual injury, which kind of blows a hole into every single match where a guy has a hurt limb and makes Sting look wimpy for the entire match needing to be stopped. Everybody else has to "survive on their injury". Took a lot of steam out of the thing. I still got sucked back in as Rollins put over the Deathlock nicely but this was a weird way to end things.

And then Kane. Because of fucking course Kane. Kane is that fucking herpes sore you're constantly dreading flaring up. You know it's gonna flare up and you keep hoping it won't but you have fucking herpes and you're always going to have herpes.

(I don't have herpes)

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2014 Ongoing Match of the Year List

27. Sheamus v. Cesaro WWE Night of Champions 9/21

PAS: That was as nasty as you would hope it would be. Really felt like a modern version of a Valentine v. Garvin match, with both guys just unloading with shots 1/3 harder then anyone else in this fed (except maybe Lesnar, we will see). Started out with some pretty gritty amateur wrestling and it kept building and building until it finished with the nastiest version of a New Japan slap finish, Okada and Tanahashi need to watch the end of this match on a loop.

ER: Opening standing and mat scrambles remind me of recent Thatcher/Gulak stuff, which is appropriate as those guys always remind me of Cesaro. Feels like Sheamus is a guy who should get pimped more as a top shelf guy. Maybe people are put off by his goofy promos? I think he's doing a fine job of replacing the Irish asskicker hole in my heart that Finlay's retirement left. Sheamus doing a drop toe hold, with Cesaro fighting it and Sheamus finally dragging him down by yanking on his arm was beautiful. These guys mesh so well together and neither has a problem laying in nasty shots. Both guys take turns seeing who can do a nastier kneedrop to the others' temple. I loved Sheamus getting flashy and "skinning the cat" to pull himself up to the top rope, but because of it not going smoothly it allowed Cesaro to immediately catch him with a big time uppercut. Phil made a WWEDG reference up above, made even more apt with Sheamus breaking out CIMA's Iconoclasm on Cesaro. SHIMUS? Finishing run of this is awesome, with both guys tossing each other around in cool feat of strength ways. Cesaro deadlifting a butterfly suplex and doing a weird fireman's carry slam made me rewind. God Cesaro has a great thrust kick and then follows that up with cool punches that he hardly ever uses. Sheamus pulling out the counter Brogue Kick was a fitting end as it was nowhere close to a decisive victory, so should hopefully lead to more of these two. Great match.

40. Big Ryck vs. Prince Puma Lucha Underground 9/27

PAS: I thought this was about as good an overbooked ECWish match as I have seen in quite a while. Ryck looked way better then he looked last week, everything was really stiff looking, and he was great at knowing when to bump and when to shrug off his smaller guy. All the little beats of this match were great, Ryck catching the kendo stick, deciding to chill on a chair while his boys did the work, leading to Puma dropkicking him, that brutal looking KO forearm, and then the crazy Parkour leap from the rafters for the save. The finish felt a little telegraphed, but otherwise this was way better then it had any right to be.

ER: I thought this was pretty great. It was a great example of run-ins and interference actually adding to a match. I was expecting having to see a bunch of the massive Ryck taking a bunch of flipping armdrags. Instead Ryck got to break out a bunch of brutal offense, and Puma's comebacks were handled in really smart ways like having Cortez and Cisco interfere to take all the cool moves, which would lead to Ryck being taken off guard. The progression of the match is just really smart, with Puma fighting this monster, and Ryck actually coming off like a monster. Every one of Ryck's shots looked brutal, loved him flexing over the ropes while choking Puma, loved him pulling him into a KO forearm tug-o-war style, loved his big kneelifts. The spot where Ryck pulls up a chair to watch his goons take apart Puma, only to have Puma take them apart and then blast Ryck with a dropkick is just smart, fun, and unique. Poor props to the camera work for the way they filmed Mundo dropping in from above. It really looked like he flew 20 feet into the ring. This was a really impressive match, with a super smart layout that made every person involved look great.

Ongoing Match of the Year List

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WWE Night of Champions Live Blog

We figured we would give this another shot.

ER: I skimmed through the pre-show as it said on the heading there would be an "exclusive match". Unless it was 90 seconds long, I didn't see one. What I did get to see was Alex Riley talking about an abdominal hernia, Goldust with cool new facepaint, and Randy Orton making a 15+ year old South Park reference. Also, when they were showing highlights of Mark Henry rallying America, Alex Riley said "Now THAT was a solid American rally!" I hate watching preview shows for actual sports, not sure why having a show with Alex Riley is necessary with 5 hours of weekly TV already acting as a PPV preview show.

ER: Tag title match is up first, and they show photos of past tag champs, showing the Blackjacks, Hart Foundation, Legion of Doom, Edge & Christian and…Tony Atlas & Rocky Johnson?! They picked 5 tag teams to show, not sure how Atlas/Rocky made the cut. I guess they didn't have a good enough file photo of Bull Buchanan & The Godfather.

1. Goldust/Stardust beat the Usos

PAS: Man this was a great match. I have talked ad nauseum about how great Goldust is as a face in peril, but he is really great as an Arn Anderson heel working over a face in peril. Just nasty, I liked weirdo heel Stardust too, that glove slap spot was odd but worked with what they were doing. They had some neat counter spots, like Cody turning a Samoan drop into a neckbreaker and Dustin ducking one enzigiri and getting caught with a second. We had a great DGWWE crazy spot run finish and a great ending. Really looking forward to the rematch and whatever other face teams the Rhodes boys wrestle.

ER: Seriously Goldust's makeup is killer here. He also continues his 5 year streak of managing to look in better and better shape. The Dust Bros. have been one of my absolute favorite teams in WWE history, and the Usos are up there too. It's weird what happens when you let guys team for a long time. And this match was killer, a WWE tag match that finally lives up to the hype of all the really good ones earlier this year. Goldust is probably the most versatile guy in the company as he's easily the best FIP, but he's also an incredible aggressor. Here he adds an extra wrinkle by being the guy waiting to ambush an Uso when Stardust's eccentricity allows the Usos an opening. Jimmy hits Cody with a press off the barrier, Goldust is there with a nasty powerslam on the floor. Cody's squirrely goofball is a good thing for his ring work as it adds an intensity that wasn't there before. Him stomping an Uso while holding him by the puka shells was something that wouldn't happen before. Usos are real good FIP and their comeback uppercuts looked as good as ever, also really loved the connecting enziguiri on Goldust (after he ducked the first attempt) that led to the hot tag. I loved Stardust's cool neckbreaker out of a Samoan Drop. This was just a hot tag match, right up there with all the best ones from WWE this year.

2. Sheamus beat Cesaro to retain the US Title

PAS: That was as nasty as you would hope it would be. Really felt like a modern version of a Valentine v. Garvin match, with both guys just unloading with shots 1/3 harder then anyone else in this fed (except maybe Lesnar, we will see). Started out with some pretty gritty amateur wrestling and it kept building and building until it finished with the nastiest version of a New Japan slap finish, Okada and Tanahashi need to watch the end of this match on a loop.

ER: Opening standing and mat scrambles remind me of recent Thatcher/Gulak stuff, which is appropriate as those guys always remind me of Cesaro. Feels like Sheamus is a guy who should get pimped more as a top shelf guy. Maybe people are put off by his goofy promos? I think he's doing a fine job of replacing the Irish asskicker hole in my heart that Finlay's retirement left. Sheamus doing a drop toe hold, with Cesaro fighting it and Sheamus finally dragging him down by yanking on his arm was beautiful. These guys mesh so well together and neither has a problem laying in nasty shots. Both guys take turns seeing who can do a nastier kneedrop to the others' temple. I loved Sheamus getting flashy and "skinning the cat" to pull himself up to the top rope, but because of it not going smoothly it allowed Cesaro to immediately catch him with a big time uppercut. Phil made a WWEDG reference up above, made even more apt with Sheamus breaking out CIMA's Iconoclasm on Cesaro. SHIMUS? Finishing run of this is awesome, with both guys tossing each other around in cool feat of strength ways. Cesaro deadlifting a butterfly suplex and doing a weird fireman's carry slam made me rewind. God Cesaro has a great thrust kick and then follows that up with cool punches that he hardly ever uses. Sheamus pulling out the counter Brogue Kick was a fitting end as it was nowhere close to a decisive victory, so should hopefully lead to more of these two. Great match.

ER: Backstage Big Show pumps Henry up by telling him that 318 million Americans are Henry's tag partner tonight. Really though, there's a LOT of dead weight on that team.

3. The Miz beat Dolph Ziggler for the IC Title

PAS: Not bad for two guys I don’t care about and was stuck as a background to shilling that country act.  Actually built to a fun finish run, with the figure four being put over pretty hard,  I liked Ziggler selling the knee as part of the famasser. Full Worldwide point.

ER: Florida Georgia Line on commentary for the whole match makes me even less excited for this one. I'm a Ziggler fan but Miz is almost always FF time for me. I liked Ziggler in this, loved his rapid fire elbow drops. One of the guys in FGL has Beavis's hair. I'm sure Phil right now is talking about disliking Ziggler (note: I was totally right), but Ziggler is one of the athletic bumper type guys that Phil always dislikes, but usually likes something new he does in every match. Will they or won't they, right? The match did about as good as possible at using the seconds and FGL, and I really liked Ziggler putting over the Figure 4 as an actual damaging submission. That thing has been raked through the muck so much over the years that it was refreshing to see. Fun match that didn't overstay its welcome.

Reigns had emergency hernia surgery so the Rollins/Reigns match is off

4. Seth Rollins "beat" Roman Reigns by count out

PAS: Seth Rollins and Ambrose brawl was a nice piece of pro wrestling. I think everyone knew Ambrose was coming out, but no one does out of control nutcase as good as anyone. I loved his plancha on Jamie Knoble and Finlay, and I liked him being dragged out of the ring. Excited to see that match up again.

ER: I loved the camera showing Ambrose journey from backstage to ring. Actually felt like something they don't do that much anymore. Rollins flies over the top from a giant Ambrose clothesline and then gets tossed like a nut over the barrier. Ambrose does the best "through the crowd" brawls since Jimmy Jacobs or Necro Butcher. Ambrose cannonballed into a sea of agents like Gary Busey jumping into the pool in Point Break. God Ambrose would have been a perfect cast member of Point Break. I need a Point Break sequel with Ambrose as Bodhi Jr. You know Bodhi had to have tons of illegitimate children scattered around Santa Monica.

ER: Before the next match Lilian Garcia sings the National Anthem and Henry wells up with tears. I loved Henry's facials during the anthem, putting the song over more than any black man since Marvin Gaye at the All Star Game. Wrestling always seems to use the Anthem as a cheap pop but here it was fitting and Henry made it a legit powerful moment.

5. Rusev beat Mark Henry

PAS: I liked how this was worked at a slower pace then the earlier match, as it was built on stiffness and selling. Henry is great conveying emotion and selling. I loved the struggle when he finally got the worlds strongest slam up, and I liked how that was the last gasp Henry had in him. I feel bad because they built this up as a huge moment for Henry and had him fail. I am emotionally involved in Henry and I felt real disappointment.

ER: I liked this match but it was the first match of the night to fall below my expectations. Still, it was paced smartly and Henry was able to show how great he is at selling. I was very surprised they put Rusev this strongly over Henry, as he got to overpower and break him down. Rusev's superkick really looks great with the extra pump he puts into it, and I loved the one thrown at a hurt Henry while he was draped over the ropes. Henry's screams as Rusev locked on The Accolade were shockingly real. Henry's emotions in all this were incredible. I really hope they continue with this feud as I think it's good for both.

6. Randy Orton beat Chris Jericho

PAS: I have to give these guys credit for really trying their hardest to have a classic. Jericho was blistering Orton with chops, taking crazy bumps and working some really nifty counters and near falls.  That over the top bump was truly nuts for an old guy.  I am utterly indifferent to both guys, and they actually got me into it at the end.

ER: Man I wish there was a way to watch matches on the Network in double speed. Jericho looked good though, some of his chops were aimed at the throat, like Benoit used to do in matches against Regal. Jericho taking a crazy bump over the top past the turnbuckle got my attention. Michael Cole is the least convincing Diet Mountain Dew pitchman ever. I'm pretty sure the only people who buy Diet Mountain Dew are dads who bought it because they meant to buy regular Mountain Dew, the same accidental purchase market that allows Cheese Nips to exist. Jericho follows up his nutty earlier bump with a nice bump to the floor after Orton kicked him off a Walls attempt. Match overall was better than I expected and Jericho really busted ass. Orton is such a flatline for me though.

ER: Brie Bella is one of the worst stick workers in company history. Really lends creedence to a lot of Total Divas conversations being unscripted, as she actually sounds like she's having a real conversation most of the time on TD. But whenever she does a promo on TV she sounds like an alien trying its best to blend into American society.

7. AJ beat Paige & Nikki Bella for the Divas title

PAS: This is the night of everything exceeding expectations (except for Henry v. Rusev.) I have no reason to want to watch a longish Divas three ways, but this was pretty stiff and relatively entertaining. I liked Paige yelling "Why don't you love me" while headbutting her. I don't know the angle but Paige sort of got me into it in ring. Nikki Bella was sort of useless, but I might not fast forward through the Paige v. Lee rematch.

ER: I dug Nikki in this. She was probably useless as an addition to the match, but I didn't think her work within the match was useless. She cut real low on clotheslines, talks shit within matches more naturally than 90% of WWE workers (who usually work their matches silently) and had a couple cool slams (really liked her trapped arm forward slam). I'm actually amused by the AJ/Paige interplay, the weird not-totally-explained dynamic. I actually sorta kinda like Divas matches, which always leads me to telling Phil about them, and him telling me he won't watch them. So I'm glad he had to watch one here.

PAS: I really liked the stats intro for the Brock v. Cena match. The MMA stuff doesn't work for most match (it would be silly for something like Jericho v. Orton) but it works here.

ER: WWE seems to actually know when to smartly use stats breakdowns to hype matches, which is directly offset by the constant ear poison of their relentless Twitter stats and odd Facebook "like" brags (WWE has more likes than the U.S. Air Force!). But I dug the numbers breakdown here, and I love when they use the numbers to hype the Royal Rumble every year.

8. John Cena vs. Brock Lesnar for the WWE Title

PAS: I thought the first match this year was more of a spectacle then a great match, the rematch was more of an awesome wrestling match, with Cena learning from his mistakes and firing back with some really nasty looking potato punches and elbows. I also liked how Lesnar kept mixing in the Kimura.  I liked Cena totally unloading his entire arsenal on Lesnar, and I would have bought that being the finish. Really didn't like the Rollins run in, there had to be a better way to set up the third match.

ER: First match kind of left me a little speechless. I had no real way to analyze it. How many other times has a huge star taken that much of a beating without getting any real shine? So I was real excited for the follow up and I thought they delivered big time. I LOVE Cena getting German'd by Lesnar. I could watch that all day. Cena takes them impossibly great, like Inoki getting tossed by Vader. All of Cena's comebacks here were (I assume intentionally, though never picked up by the crack commentary team) based on Lesnar's past MMA weaknesses: Cena picking his ankle had echoes of Mir grabbing him, Cena overwhelming him with stiff punches and elbows was like Cain Velasquez completely overwhelming him with strikes. Cena's strikes here were really rough, especially his awesome back elbows (Rachel watching with me said "It looks like Cena's trying to hit Brock for real" which made Lesnar getting up with a bloody nose even cooler). The kimura reversals were great, and damn Lesnar holding Cena vertically in a kimura looked brutal, and I love Lesnar kicking out of Cena's AA's on the one count. I actually wasn't expecting a run-in, and I hope they don't do something silly like build a 3 way. But I did like the way Rollins stuff was handled even if it left the match really flat.

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