Found Footage Friday: WWF 1998~! AUSTIN~! TOO SEXY~! AGUILA~! FAAROOQ~! CACTUS~! TAFKA GOLDUST~! QUEBECERS~!

WWF House Show Anaheim 3/13/98

Mr. Aguila vs. Brian Christopher

MD: This was the good stuff. I can't imagine anything else on the show is going to reach this level. Christopher was as on as a human being could possibly be. Fascinating reactions to things, fascinating creative choices. He went for a German out of the corner and Aguila landed on his feet. Yet he celebrated like he had just tossed him across the ring. Surely, he would have felt... well, no matter. Then he ate a massive dive and sold his throat for some reason. I enjoyed it. He had some really nice offense too, not just the power bomb down the stretch but a Stroke and this Bulldog which for some reason Aguila decided to sell by compacting himself in a seated spot. Story of his comeuppance was going for the same thing twice and then having it backfire on him in the most spectacular way possible (bulldog #2 let to him crotched in the corner). Really, this was Christopher wound up and given room to run as fast and as far as possible to amazing results.

ER: I love how long they both took coming to the ring. We've never seen Aguila take this long to walk to the ring, and because of that this is the most we have ever heard of Aguila's music. This is the clearest this theme has ever been played. We're learning more about WWF Aguila than ever before, as this is also a clear beautiful look at his gear. This is a GREAT set of gear on Aguila, great use of bright color against white, Lisa Frank color with a clean white canvas. He uses that canvas to paint something beautiful, like the sequence where he knocked Christopher down with a spinning heel kick, hit an effortlessly high floating dropkick to knock him to the floor, then hit an incredible twisting moonsault press to the floor. Cleanest shit ever. 

Christopher was great at setting up his own offense and Aguila's. His set up and execution of the Stroke, rolling Aguila through and firmly planting him, got a stunned reaction and he knew it, soaking in the crowd's hate even more than normal. His messy bulldog (complimentary) nicely set up Aguila shoving him off the next bulldog, balls first into the turnbuckles. The elbowdrop Aguila dropped right on Christopher's face after he dropped to the mat was the best...or was it the best when Christopher hopped to his feet running in place selling that the elbowdrop smashed his nose. How often did we get to see Christopher use two different powerbomb variations in WWF? Funny that I'm seeing it on a house show. Both men covered from the blown spot well, Christopher worked as base for luchadors far better than anyone could have expected. 

Steve Blackman vs. Faarooq

MD: Farooq looked really good here. Just tons of presence. He called everyone ugly on the mic to start, then got Blackman to pose, lured him into the corner and hit a spinning heelbutt I've never seen him do. It was just the way he carried himself. He went for a handshake and Blackman kicked it away but then he got him to run right into the spinebuster slam. Most of his offense was just tossing Blackman out so D-Lo and Henry could beat on him, and Blackman won far, far too soon with a small package out of nowhere, but Farooq looked great in the few minutes we got here, just like the savviest wrestler going. Post-match there was Nation dissension and Rocky ran out and drew chants to try to calm everything down.  

ER: Faarooq looked so damn good here. As someone who's been throwing 1998 WWF on as a break from 1997 WCW, I can attest that this is the best Faarooq looks in the ring in the entire first half of '98. Was he saving it all for the house shows? I'm so confused. He had a really cool Raw match against Shamrock in January '98, so maybe we just weren't getting enough Faarooq against shooters? Honestly, this is one of the greatest NATION performances we have. This is more than just the leader, this is everybody contributing. Faarooq is out here channeling Jungle Jim Kelly with a corner spinkick that he never otherwise used, showing off his peoples' karate to some white karate champ, while his whole team is putting in great work. How about Mark Henry throwing fucking BODY shots full arm into Blackman's stomach? Mark Henry is in baggy light wash jeans and a leather vest and is so wide it's insane. He looks like prom night Shaq. Kama and D-Lo put the boots to Blackman and Kama throws one of the best punches he's ever thrown. Faarooq's singlet doesn't get enough credit for being as elegant as it was. A truly great piece of pro wrestling gear. The simple band diagonally across his torso and the confidence to have so much of the singlet all black. This is confidence. Blackman's inside cradle finish was so slick and so well executed that it played as a finish just as well as Ogawa beating Akiyama, but this was a whole damn Nation show.

Cactus Jack vs. Billy Gunn [Falls Count Anywhere] 

MD: This was great fun. Just constant motion with weapon shots and big bumps all around and stooging from Gunn. Gunn landing on the outstretched chair and taking a goofy flopping bump was one of my favorite Billy Gunn things ever. The transitions were otherwise basically of convenience. Gunn would roll out on the Mandible Claw. He'd roll Cactus back in and Jack would take over in the corner with punches and the running knee, etc. So it wasn't exactly rocket science, but it was still very enjoyable and the sort of thing people weren't going to get on TV. 

ER: Also as part of my 1998 rewatch, I have become a much bigger fan of Billy Gunn than ever before. Did I contribute to the not-long-ago Billy Gunn discourse online? I sure did. I don't know why we didn't give him credit for what he was doing in '98 while it was happening, but damn has his work aged well. This man is a true stooge who is incredible at setting up opponents and taking a lot of damage. All of that is on display here, and all of it plays perfectly off Cactus. Gunn is the best part of the brawl on the floor, the way he hits the ring steps for max volume, the way he flops around on all his bumps and the way he and Cactus get so dirty after a suplex. Why is the floor of the Arrowhead Pond so damn filthy!? Was this a cowboy bar on days the Ducks weren't playing and they needed to fill the arena with sawdust? Gunn and Cactus get so covered in dust that they look like they're on a crew who hauls asbestos out of office buildings. 

Gunn is the perfect foil for all of Cactus's offense, from the violent to the absurd. He leans into Jack's best punches and holds firm to take a running knee in the corner. He gets tossed through a table in the corner and later takes a hard whip into the table he broke. But he is at his best getting over through absurdity, and that is on full display when he gets his balls salad tonged by Cactus and the crowd loses their damn minds for it. Gunn lays Cactus out with a chair and lays the chair over his face, setting up a fistdrop off the middle buckle - he even kisses his fist, which is some expert fistdrop knowledge from a guy who I've never see do a fistdrop before - that is of course reversed when Cactus raises the chair to meet Billy. Gunn's running in place face flop to sell the absurdity was divine. His two big pieces of offense looked great, snapping off a piledriver with real torque and sticking the not-yet-named Fameasser when Cactus ducks his head. For the finish, I loved Billy's kickout attempt after taking the double arm DDT on a chair. No life in the legs, no chance of kickout, but a visual attempt to roll his shoulder up at 3 that didn't take away from any of the violent and/or silly damage he took. 

Mark Mero vs. Chainz

MD: No idea how they thought this was going to work. The only babyface out there was Sable (and someone was whistling for her the whole match). Mero's entrance was over with all the lights and Sable was very over in general, getting her own chant as the match started. Mero played to the crowd, especially when it came to her. Chainz was just there, a de facto babyface who didn't get a shine (he tossed Mero out right at the start). Mero's shots and knees and what not looked good, but no one wanted to see Chainz work up from a chinlock (even being choked by wrist tape). He had a brief comeback but missed a Bombs Away kneedrop and ate the TKO. Probably good to see the state of the Mero/Sable act in a setting like this but this was doomed from the start.

ER: Chainz was definitely the babyface here, he was just the least defined character of the DOA. Part of this was because he didn't have a nazi twin, part of it was having a Z in his name like he was a member of the Burger King Kids Club. But he was a babyface at this point of 1998, even if that was mostly because DOA were in a regular feud with the Nation and WWF crowds were definitely going to be in the corner of DOA for reasons beyond face/heel alignment. Would a heel have the kind of shiny, lustrous hair that Chainz had? 

I thought the match worked really well with Chainz as babyface, throwing strong punches that Mero took like a great overpowered heel. I was also surprised at how fast Mero bumped to the floor when Chainz threw him through the ropes. Both men bump real well for the other. Mero goes down hard for a shoulderblock and clothesline, Chainz takes a shockingly cool bump when Mero snaps his neck over the ropes. He took it the exact same way Jimmy Hart took his apron bumps, and bumping was an underrated part of Chainz' game. Yes, I realize while typing that that every part of Chainz' game was underrated, because there isn't a person reading this who can clearly picture their favorite WWF Chainz moments. What did Chainz use as a finisher? I can't ever recall him winning a match during this run. But in the couple months around WrestleMania this year, he seemed like a guy who was trying for the last time to be noticed. We're not counting that weird stretch in TNA where he was losing 10 pounds a week until he was all teeth and jawbone and his hair started suffering from vitamin deficiency, I mean that he was trying to stand out to someone in WWF who might notice. 

Go watch how much Chainz puts himself out there in the DOA vs. DX vs. Boricuas chain match angle from Raw 4/13/98 (I fully understand if you do not do this) and it was clear he was trying to be noticed by someone. Was it me? Was it me, Chainz, noticing you 25 years after the fact? I love what you did against Marc Mero, Chainz. I loved your missed kneedrop off the middle buckle, and loved you leaning in to take Mero's kneelift to the side of the head rather than to your breadbasket. Nobody else took Mero's kneelift this way, only you Chainz. And it looked really good! I am a noticer, always noticing things. Your effort was true. 

Steve Austin vs. Hunter Hearst Helmsley 

MD: I haven't actually written out the word "Helmsley" in a very long time. It still has a red underline under it. I'm not going back to check. Let me dump in some of the personal stuff here actually. I didn't watch a hell of a lot of wrestling from ~93-98. I remember seeing Hogan turn on scramblevision. Mania XIV was in Boston (I lived in a suburb) so with the public workout and everything, people were buzzing about it at High School and that's when I more or less got back into it, right around here.

That said, I don't go back to 98 WWF much. If we had more house shows, maybe it'd be different. What I have seen tends to be C-Shows. So I haven't seen these guys from this particular year in a long time. And it's fascinating just to see Austin move. I'm more used to the Austin of a couple of years earlier or a couple of years later, but here he was a superstar just ready to get the belt and carry the company. He conducted the crowd and fed off of them. It was a house show. The act hadn't quite calcified yet. So he was a little looser but it didn't feel pandering in any way. 

What I'll say about Hunter here is that he was very giving. His character didn't earn a single thing. He got everything through cheating or Chyna or chance. I imagine it wouldn't have carried through quite as well if TV cameras were on but he let himself be genuinely vulnerable in a way that, after a certain point, he never did genuinely again. And he came off as a better, more effective heel because of it. 

Early on they did a couple of hammerlock bits which were very good. Great back elbow and fun punch out of them. That's probably what I will remember out of this as much as anything else. Austin had to fight his way back from some legwork, but he did. The finish was wonky, overthought. Even vulnerable Hunter is still Hunter. It did six or seven things (too complicated a set up for the comeback with a double down that wasn't really needed, shrugging of the stunner the first time, a ref bump, Chyna, etc.) when one or two would have hit so much better. Still, the good in here was quite good.

ER: Man, I loved this. I loved this. I thought it was great. Austin was flat out incredible and constant motion towards something More, while HHH turned in what might be his best performance of the year. I have seen enough Austin/HHH matches and don't think they always work well as opponents, primarily because of HHH, but this was tremendous and a perfect use of time. If you dare, go ahead and check out their brutally long match a few weeks later from Mayhem in Manchester, and you can see a HHH with no idea how to treat a match against Austin. Here? Like night and day, roles defined perfectly and not a single wasted movement by either. HHH was not attempting to work cool heel, he was just feeding and setting things up for Austin to knock down, which he did spectacularly. The work over Austin's perpetually injured knee/s was interesting, and the ways Austin moved around that knee work was amazing. It's crazy how active Austin was in this era. 

For a guy who would eventually be surrounded by go go go wrestlers, it's wild how much he went went went without making his actual work feel empty and forgotten. It's funny whenever I see Austin talked about as a guy who "didn't do much" in the ring. Maybe that's referring to his "small moveset" (silly) but I watch the guy and see someone who is constantly doing something. Austin is a very active wrestler and this 12 minute and change format is perfect for him to craft this active, cool story. I loved every beat of this. When Hunter was getting his ass kicked, he was actually getting his ass kicked. This was not a self-service stooge performance from Hunter, he wasn't yet at the time where he was "showing people he could work down" he was just the heel taking a beating. Early, Austin rocks him so good with a back elbow to break a hammerlock that I had to rewind it a few times, both to see the elbow and to see the actual anger in Hunter's face. That's how a heel should look when a tough babyface elbows him in his big nose. And, while it didn't smash Hunter's nose, Austin's falling elbow is one of the greatest pieces of offense in wrestling history. What an incredible magic trick. This wife beating beer drinking Texas rattlesnake also figured out how to work an incredibly dangerous elbow, pointed directly at someone's throat and never showing a sliver of light, in a way that looks like he's collapsing a man's trachea. The trust he built with that elbow is incredible, and earned. 

When things settle down into Hunter working the knee, I loved the way Austin would stay in the match while selling, never settling into a long Hunter control sequence (because Austin rightly understood that Hunter has next to no ideas how to control things for that long), which fits perfectly into Austin's style. He is a fighter, a man who wants to constantly advance and who will keep after you after losing a limb, and that's how he sells the leg. There is an incredible spot, my personal favorite moment on this show, where Austin misses a clothesline and falls forward into the ropes, recovering in time for Hunter to kick him straight in the knee. The way Austin missed this clothesline pays such perfect attention to detail, every frame looking like a man who threw to connect, falling into the ropes because your missed momentum carried you there. His fall into the ropes looked like a man who hadn't considered he would ever miss that clothesline. Only the top 0.1% of wrestlers can miss offense with that kind of conviction. 

Chyna's involvement was the perfect amount as well, as her presence was always acknowledged while her threats were mostly implied. When she finally elbow smashes Austin from the floor it played as one of the best moments of an already excellent match. When she finally gets in the ring for the finish, the crowd was rabid for any kind of involvement from her. The way they played Chyna's first year in the company was an incredible use of restraint, totally unimaginable today. Austin's greatest feat in this match is actually making Hunter's goof ass Flair/Race cosplay bumps mean something other than "now is the time Hunter can show that he has watched several Flair/Race matches". His rolling upside down bump in the corner is almost always shoehorned into a match, but here felt like the best possible use and execution, adding an off the rails feel to Austin's comeback fire. 

I honestly don't think I could name 10 better matches in 1998 WWF. If these house shows keep coming, maybe eventually we'll be able to name 20 better. 

Godwinns vs. DoA [Country Whipping]

MD: Three minutes. The fans didn't really care at all until a couple of hard Godwinn shots in the ring towards the end. I was off thinking why they didn't get a couple more hillbillies (Moondog Splat was still active in 97?) and have them as part of the whole gang wars thing. And then I blinked and there was a slop drop and the thing was over. On some level this was kind of Death Valley Days coded. Just guys whipping the hell out of each other for three minutes and going home. If Phil, Matt and Eric booked this though, it'd have way more emotional resonance. 

ER: This was only two minutes long and a mostly useless two minutes, all likely for a very good reason. When you have Nazi Bikers taking on Confederacy Nostalgists it is only a matter of time before they come to some real Can't We All Just Get Along conclusions. Why are we lightly whipping each other for two minutes? We all collectively, the four of us, hate blacks, so why are we fighting each other? Henry and Skull have a moment of understanding that they're wasting their own energy fighting those with the same goals, so they agree to a lazily set up Slop Drop and clear the ring so a full crew of tough black dudes can do something more productive. 

Rock vs. Ken Shamrock

MD: Sort of a tale of two matches here. Shamrock looked great early, charging right in and having a lot of dynamic offense. Rocky fed and fed and fed and he did a great job with it. Some distraction from the outside let Rocky take over and it was a little off to me, a little rough around the edges. He didn't register some of Shamrock's stuff in the hope spots. That sort of thing. They did another ref bump here, but it was a nice one with a ducked clothesline. Then the rest of the Nation got involved and everything fell apart. It looked like Rocky was going to sneak away with a win after a D-Lo chairshot but another ref ran out and the Nation swarmed in. DQ win for Shamrock with the fans getting at least one big moment as he hit the Belly to Belly on Henry after a heated face off. 

Headbangers vs. Quebecers

MD: I had high hopes for this one, and it seemed like they'd be personified in Jacques' look. It was pretty amazing. Quebecers had the blue gear here, but Jacques had his hair pulled back tight, which made him looking like the hairline was really receding, with an almost fluffy ponytail, and a baldspot in the middle. Amazing stuff.

There was nothing wrong with this match really, but I wanted more elaboration in the early stooging. Pierre bumped all over the place, but I needed a bit more pluck and comeuppance from Jacques. It's a house show. Do all the bits. They did barely any of the bits. There'd be more bits on a 1989 Rougeaus TV squash. So I was a little disappointed there. I did like the finish where one Headbanger leapfrogged over the other to avoid a whip into one another, only to run right into Quebecers clotheslines. That set up the Quebecers going for their finisher, it getting broken up and the Headbangers hitting theirs. I needed this to have 600% more bullshit and I'm not sure why it didn't.

Undertaker vs. TAFKA Goldust

MD: There were elements to the initial Goldust character which pushed things in clever, if not entirely subtle ways. I don't think much of that was in this incarnation. It was all trying too hard and so little of it landed. Dustin wasn't at his physical best here but he still bumped all over the place for Taker and had his usual timing. Another distraction transition, this time with Taker choking Luna. I liked the comeback though as Taker hit a flurry of punches to the gut like he was playing Punch Out! Then the lights went off and the place went more nuts for Kane than they did for any of the matches. You wonder about the mic-ing with the cameras as they are for most of this, but when the place explodes for something like that it really does make you feel like they've just been quiet for most of the wrestling. I kind of liked Taker's punch exchange on Kane too. Weirdly, the ref didn't call for the DQ even though it would have made total sense (it wasn't a ball control thing either; Kane was getting shots in). But they wanted to send the fans home happy with a "clean" win after the Tombstone I guess and they couldn't do yet another ref bump. 

I'm going to chalk this off as a dubiously agented show. There were good things, but past the Christopher match, which they still might have gotten pre-show, just at half the length, and the Cactus Jack match which they wouldn't be getting anywhere else save maybe PPV (at least until the Hardcore division started up), I don't think it was all that much of a stronger experience than you would have gotten from a Raw of this era, and as a house show, it really should have been.

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Found Footage Friday: PARK IN PANAMA~! LAWLER~! CHRSTOPHER~! KING~! STARR~! PORKY~! GRUNDY~!

Principe Island vs. Sandokan Panama 1988/89

MD: Almost certainly, Principe Island is LA Park. He's got be around 23 here. Overall, this is a pretty impressive apuestas match to have in his "pre-history." He ambushed Sandokan to start and the primera was bloody and visceral. We lose about twenty seconds to static and when we come back, he's got Sandokan down and is biting the wound. That sums it up pretty well. He ends it with an impressive flurry of bounding back into the ring, over the ropes, and then hitting a flipping dive off the apron, before launching a back flipping kick in the ring for the pin. Occasionally some of his kicks look off and he's a half step behind on feeding for bits of the comeback, but overall he does very well here. That comeback is good despite that, by the way. Sandokan ducks punches and hits big ones of his own to the crowd's delight and then he's able to turn a jumping Principe knee into a back body drop. Pretty rousing stuff. 

Then they really go all out for the tercera, with both guys missing moves off the top rope (Principe missing a senton atomico) and hitting dives (Principe with a bit tope and Sandokan flying off the top to the floor). It's an exciting stretch at the end with a fight over who would hit a move off the top (Sandokan eventually gets a superplex) and a ref bump leading to Principe scoring a phantom submission. When he went to celebrate, Sandokan got behind him, holding him up in an electric chair position while on the second rope and dropping back for the win. You can never get a sense of how full these arenas are because so many people are out of their seats mobbing the ring side area. Post match, Principe seemed to make it through the various stages of grief as he walks around trying to not have his mask taken off by Sandokan. I'm not sure he ever quite gets to acceptance though, as he's still jawing on the mic with his mask off at the end. Not perfect, but a very good overall performance for young Park.

PAS: What a discovery! This is a bloody wild lucha apuestas with one of the all time greatest wild bloody lucha apuestas workers as a pup. The crowd was seemingly on the verge of a riot the whole time, and I thought we might get Park brawling with the fans when he spilled into them. Loved the early violent beatdown on Sandokan: Park busts a bottle over his head to start and grinds the pieces of glass into his head, cutting him badly. He also throws a classic Park chairshot where he let it go as he swung it so it careened awkwardly into Sadokan's head. Sadokan is a real discovery too. We have enough footage now to really get a sense of him as a top level local charismatic babyface brawler, kind of a Panamanian Colon, with some big dives and hard stiff punches mixed in. Matt mentioned a bit of awkwardness but I like my apuestas to be a bit raggedy. I thought this was completely awesome, one of the greatest unearthed pieces of footage we have found since this project started. 

ER: This was tremendous. An apuestas match that really felt like an apuestas, that universal wrestling language we've seen is that way because it works regardless of language or era. Not too long ago we knew collectively very little about the Panamanian lucha scene, and now we have this cool snapshot of local babyface legend Sandokan, who really does seem like Panama's Carlos Colon. At this point I'm going to need to see the Costa Rican Carlos Colon, and the El Salvadoran Carlos Colon, I'm sure there's someone similar in Honduras, and I'm going to need to see the LA Park matches with all of them. Panama is nowhere near Mexico City, so I have no clue how often Park was going down that way, who facilitated his trips there, nothing. I know how often I've driven from the Bay Area to Omaha, NE - the same distance from Mexico City to Panama - and that's zero times baby. Park is just showing up 1500 miles away making locals bleed and starting near riots. He bloodies up Sandokan and runs him mouth first down the apron into a ringpost, then gives him a real LA Park chairshot with an open metal folding chair. It's a real beating, with hard right hands and plenty of flash (I can't imagine cannonballs off the apron were anywhere near the norm in late 80s Panama) while also bashing Sandokan into the ring steps. 

He bumps huge for Sandokan's comebacks and knows exactly when to act cutthroat and when to get his ass beat. Sandokan has great babyface punches and Park's bumping takes over the rest. Park bumps like Jerry Estrada (or, like LA Park), taking essentially four straight backdrops, the 4th sending him flying head first flipping through the ropes to the concrete, goes up for a big spinning backbreaker, takes a nasty full extension stretched out bump into the ringpost, always managing to out-bump Sandokan x2. Sandokan misses a big top rope splash? Just look how high Principe is going to bounce on his missed flipping senton. The ramped up flying is cool, with Park's tope suicida and Sandokan's plancha leading to believable moments of each man barely beating the count, and there's a cool superplex where Park tried to drag Sandokan up to the top turnbuckle by his ears before getting thrown off. If you have to have some drama at the finish, I at least like how this was done. The referee gets knocked to the floor in a big bump, and Park gets the ref-less win after a back suplex. As he's celebrating on the turnbuckles, he eats a flat out crazy electric chair drop off the middle buckle, and the post-match unmasking and mic work sounds heated as hell. I'm going to need any and all unseen La Parka footage, and at this point I want to see more big Sandokan title matches. Model citizen, zero discipline. 

Brazo de Plata vs. Aaron Grundy (Mike Shaw) CMLL 12/15/92

MD: This is hair vs hair. It's 6 minutes, two per fall. It's a Porky hair match so we pretty much have to cover it at some point and it's ok, you know? I'm sure people knew what they were getting here: big guys crashing into each other over a short period of time. Grundy had the advantage to start and did beat Porky around the ring. He took a shot to the post on the outside but no color. He ate a clothesline (meaty enough) in the ring and a pretty woeful splash from Grundy. Porky's big comeback in the segunda (after a missed corner charge) was an unlikely slam and an iffy splash of his own. The tercera saw Grundy take back over with a pokey punch after a handshake lure-in, but he had the good manners to miss a splash off the second turnbuckle and this time Porky got some air on his splash. This was clipped so we just had the action and a few seconds of the haircut but you can't really say that these guys didn't do what they set out to do. And hey, Shaw had nice headbutts, an ok clothesline, some decent punches in there, even if he was no Tugboat on his big splash.

ER: It would be easy to view this match as a disappointment, because I don't think it's possible to have a wholly fulfilling three falls hair vs. hair match that is less than 6 minutes of footage. Super Porky is one of my favorite big match workers and I was dying to see what he could do with Mike Shaw a mere four months before Friar Ferguson's debut/final match. This match just might be the final time that Mike Shaw ever looked like a normal human being. He's a big fat guy of course but his red singlet actually fits him, and he has a nice lush beard that covers up his goiter-like swollen bullfrog neck area. Losing his hair to Super Porky clearly made him go insane, and the man never had a normal head of hair, beard, or eyebrows past Christmas '92. So outside of the weirdness of seeing the last normal glimpse of Mike Shaw, you got a tremendous small scale Porky selling performance. 

I always talk about how Jerry Lawler is not only the greatest puncher in history, but he's the greatest punch salesman in history. He knows how to sell his own punches, and how to sell his opponent's punches better than anyone. Well, of all the praise I've heaped on Porky over the years, I don't think I've ever talked about how Porky is one of the great punch salesman in wrestling history. This match gets sincerely great when Grundy starts throwing punches directly at Porky's poor overworked heart. Grundy clearly starts targeting the ever sensitive heart of Brazo de Plata, and I love how Porky sold each one of the shots. He was in their recoiling from the blows, treating smaller shots like he was dealing with some rough heartburn (I now need to see a handheld where Porky chomps through a handful of Tums before spitting out a chalky mist after getting punched again), and as the punches get harder (and Grundy threw some awesome punches at our big boy's heart) Porky starts recoiling with his whole body, rubbing at his chest and desperately trying to create space before his ticker stops for good. Everything else in the match was rushed or a bit underwhelming - no matter how endlessly entertaining it is to see Mike Shaw throw a standing splash that is literally him just falling forward without leaving the ground an inch, his ugly missed splash off the middle at least had to have hurt his knees - but Porky getting his heart attacked was amazing. You can't ask much more from a 5 minute pro wrestling match than "an obese man tried to force his fat opponent into cardiac arrest". 

Jerry Lawler/Brian Christopher vs. Derrick King/Dustin Starr LAW 8/29/04

MD: This was the main event of the Lethal Action Wrestling 2nd Anniversary show and it was basically the Lawler Family Comedy hour. Before the match got going, Christopher did both his whole dance routine and threw his beads and Lawler seemed like a proud father for how into the crowd was, even if he refused to take the imaginary shovel. It's a little sad to think this was after Christopher's national run was basically over. Lawler's comedy was pretty funny here. They ended up riding both of the heels like bulls; Lawler did a fun dropdown bit off rope running; and the best part was King pulling the strap down fighting out of the corner and Lawler patiently putting it back on before clocking him. 

In general, whenever King and Lawler were in there together it was at least great, but it was probably just fun the rest of the time. The finish was someone sneaking King a chain and him actually getting to pin Jerry so that's probably why Team Lawler took so much of this. The heels started some real control on Christopher and that was fine (even if Starr was probably a half step behind what he might have done a couple of years later) but it was a bit too little, too late to put any drama into this. Lawler rushed in after the hot tag and really crushed everyone though, immediately dropping the strap and hitting some of his better stunners. It's always nice to see Lawler and Christopher as an over babyface team together, but the way this was structured meant that this had a relatively low ceiling, even if it did have a fairly high floor.

ER: This is a match that takes its time getting to where it's going. It also keeps the whole crowd of children and adults wildly entertained with a match that at times felt like something put on for an elementary school. This was a full Brian Christopher Go Brian Go babyface match, started with a 10 minute comedy stretch before building to some punch throwing, and was a 20 minute match with Lawler/Christopher taking at least 90% of it. I didn't care for some of it, Brian Christopher is in for most of the match while Lawler just laughs at G-Rated Brian antics. But then there are some incredibly inspired sections where Lawler and Derrick King work the exact type of match I want to see. Everything Lawler and King do against each other is the exact reason you'd be watching this 25 minute match. You knew the punch exchanges would be good, but you wouldn't have been able to predict the tights game on display. 

Lawler is in flamingo hot pink trunks and singlet, with black pink and turquoise tights paint splatter tights. It's an incredible combo, and one you'd have never guessed he was sporting back in 2004. This is a 1991-1994 era tights and singlet combo. I mean that singlet is PINK. I don't associate bubblegum and splatter paint with the 2nd George W. Bush term. Lawler must have shared his notes with King, because King is wearing his own set of hot pink trunks and singlet with some colorful big stars on his tights. It's nothing at all like anything that was happening in 2004. But the punches in the corner are universal. Derrick King has the best punches in the match. Lawler finally throws some good ones but King's are supreme. King throws a fistdrop and excellent right hooks, and the match peaks when King takes his strap down only for Lawler to slide it back up like Bugs Bunny and deck him. It's perfect, and it almost makes you forget about Lawler dishing out middle fingers and the worst looking Stone Cold Stunners you've seen. 

COMPLETE AND ACCURATE LA PARK

COMPLETE AND ACCURATE JERRY LAWLER

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Found Footage Friday: PANAMA~! KING MIKE RAPADA~! SANDOKEN~! EL SATANICO DE PANAMA~! GEMELOS INFERNALES~! EL BARON~! CHRISTOPHER~!

El Barón y Jaguar Kuna vs. Satánico y Gemelo Infernal 3 Panama 1985

MD: I wouldn't say this held up quite as well as the matches we've seen so far out of Panama. These guys were lithe, wiry, and they had some tricked out armdrags as you'd expect but other exchanges felt downright clunky. Satanico is a pale reflection of the one we know and love, just some guy in a mask. I haven't talked up the Gemelo Infernales' maskes, which are these cool goblin type deals in black and white. #3 here used his knee fairly well. Baron here had a skull match which was pretty solid too, even if he was a scrawny tecnico. His best stuff were the flying driving headbutts. Jaguar had a neat front flip he did for absolutely no reason, one great dropkick and a dive that has to be seen to be believed to end the third fall. Overall, these guys were game and occasionally things got wacky in a good way (like when Gemelo Infernal 3 kept hitting spinning tombstones on everyone which led to some uninspired head-selling by Jaguar), but didn't come together like some of the other Panamanian footage.

Sandokan/Ricardo Díaz/Antorcha 1 vs. Kronos 2/Gemelo Infernal 1/Gemelo Infernal 2 Panama 1989

MD: Back when we were all doing the AWA 80s set over ten years ago, I had the distinct feeling that Verne was terrified at the idea of overheating the crowd. Heels rarely won and they even more rarely got their heat back after the match. After seeing a decent amount of this Panamanian lucha, you really, really get the sense that they wanted to cause a riot each and every time out. Sometimes, they even manage it. Here they didn't but it was sure a surprise to me.

The first two falls were pretty much as you'd expect. The exchanges are a bit more flowing, with a lot of tosses out of a head and shoulder sort of grab. Sandoken has the most tricked out, even if not particular swift, variations. I really liked when he continued the motion through on one of these to get to his feet. Everything was smooth and kept moving, with the tecnicos winning the fall with these fun assisted victory rolls into sunset flips. They're kind of hard to explain but it was all pretty neat and you could imagine some more athletic 2022 guys stealing it successfully. The second fall was more of a beatdown with the rudos winning with submissions.

Then things really opened up. First there was a great comeback with Sandoken coming back with headbutts on everyone, Diaz with fun sweeping punches, and Antorcha with shoulder throws/back body drops, a whole bunch of the. The rudos took back over though, all leading to the Gemelos bloodying up Sandokan and Diaz on the inside and Kronos absolutely crushing Antorcha with a chairshot on the floor. We're talking an all time chairshot here.He got carried away by some of his buddies leaving things with a 3 on 2 numbers game for the rest of the match. There were a couple of comebacks, including a sort of unbelievable 3 on 1 Sandoken comeback towards the end with Sandoken kicking out of a bunch of stuff, but the numbers won out and, like I said, somehow there wasn't a riot. Just another really complete look at this regional subgenre. It remains well worth diving into.  

Brian Christopher vs. King Mike Rapada USA Championship Wrestling 6/9/01

MD: This was a TV match to heat up a feud for the No DQ match live that night. It was Brian Christopher going in to Nashville to try to take the crowd back from (now heel) Rapada and defend his dad's honor. I'm not exactly rushing to watch Rapada matches or anything, but the idea of Christopher defending Lawler and being a stand-in babyface is kind of interesting. Of course he does it in the way that Jerry would love most, blatant homophobia on the mic to start. Rapada's heel act isn't bad, as he has Honest Ernest playing a trumpet on the way down, and he keeps control during the match using the usual chicanery. Here, I think he used the "hidden object" too sparingly, just really once or twice to cut Christopher off instead of really leaning into it. Christopher had a lot of fire to start, beating Rapada around the ringside area including a bulldog on the floor. This was to set up the later match so it ended in a ref bump and trumpet shots (see, it was a good part of the act), but it was a nice look at Big Star Christopher coming home right after his WWF run ended defending the honor of the Lawler name.

Jerry Lawler vs. King Mike Rapada USA Championship Wrestling 7/28/01 

ER: This was maybe 5 minutes long including the post-match, and it wasn't very good, and also it was very good. Mike Rapada is the ultimate example of a guy who did the absolute least with the most, the Renegade von Erich, a man who never got good at wrestling despite constantly working with some of the smartest workers in wrestling history. But I actually like him in his King Mike persona, playing the aloof dumb heel with a stolen crown. He's the best dressed in the ring, but that's also because Lawler is wearing this sunny side up gear that I've never seen him wear, with white tights and yellow singlet. Jackie Fargo is wearing one of those confusing shirts that some 70 year old white men have, the kind that don't fit their personality or body. It's pointless to ask these men about these shirts (or their car dealership hats) because they won't have much of an answer about a) where they got the shirt, or b) why they ever thought it looked like a normal shirt that you would wear in front of people. 

Fargo's shirt is a hideous NBC Sports shirt-jersey, with NBC SPORTS as the name across the shoulders, a big N as the jersey number, and a big Peacock logo on the front. It doesn't resemble anything at all related to sports, and looks much closer spiritually to a toddler's onesie with a baseball playing elephant and the words Lil Slugger across the shoulders. While wearing this shirt, he calls King Mike a "little asshole" for turning on these fine people. Fargo is 70 here, so when he gets down to count a 2 count he needs to pull himself up by the ropes to stand back up, and there is zero chance he's getting back down to count another 2 for King Mike. Jackie literally just stands next to the pin with his hands on his knees waiting for them to take the hint that no count is coming. Lawler picks up on it and rakes Rapada's eyes just to move things along.  Lawler takes the strap down maybe three minutes in and throws four great right hands, also takes a big back bump on a double shoulderblock collision. Billy Joe Travis comes out and gets into the ring only to get punched by Fargo (great punch too) and in the chaos Rapada hits Lawler with a chain, Fargo gets the chain, Travis threatens Fargo, and King Mike kicks the ring announcer. Some hot matches happening an hour east at the Lebanon Airport Armory later tonight, be sure to check em out. 

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Loosely Formed 1998 WWF: Rock n Roll Express! Brian Christopher! Head Bangers!

Rock n Roll Express vs. The Head Bangers WWF Raw 2/16/98

As half-hearted as this "angle" actually was, it was really cool that WWF brought in Tommy Young to ref some of the NWA title matches

Robert Gibson worked much harder during this run than was probably necessary. Just watch how fast he bumps for armdrags and how quickly he feeds offense!

Ricky does a back rake to Mosh, and then does a second one underneath Mosh's shirt

The punch exchange between Ricky and Mosh was far better than I would have guessed it would be. Mosh tightened those rights up when working Ricky the God

Thrasher has a nice powerslam on Ricky

Ricky takes a humongous flapjack, coming one minor rotation away from looking like a Beverly Brothers victim

The Stage Dive was timed incredibly well here and rarely looked this good

Right after Mosh hits the powerbomb portion of the Stage Dive, he throws Gibson over the top to the floor. Gibson really flies, taking that bump like it was 1986, and hilariously that lets the Rock n Rolls win by DQ since getting thrown over the top draws a DQ under NWA rules. This could have/should have continued as a very fun lower card angle, if Cornette was allowed to constantly change rules to gain advantage, under the guise of "Classic NWA Rules". Sorry clowns, you can use tasers if your NWA license is up to date!

Brian Christopher vs. Tony Williams WWF Shotgun 2/21/98

Tony Williams is Memphis worker Kid Wikkid, making his only WWF appearance

Christopher has really great short right hands that he throws exactly like his dad, and I have no idea when exactly he stopped throwing punches like that

also like his dad, Christopher takes a nice backdrop bump

Kid Wikkid has a cool somewhat uncontrolled pescado

Great spot where Christopher ducks a low running crossbody and Wikkid flies right over him and under the ropes to the floor

You know what? Sure Brian, I think you should do a sunset flip powerbomb to the floor and then throw a missile dropkick to the back of this guy's head

Did Brian Christopher have the best bulldog on the roster? Almost certainly. Dustin had mostly stopped using it at this point. Matt Hardy had a good one but Christopher's was better because, as a heel, he could also use the bulldog as a transition for his opponent shoving him off into the turnbuckles

The finish is a real weird one, as Wikkid does a rana takeover and must have smashed the back of his head into the mat (even though it didn't look like a terrible landing) because he comes up with some of the rubberiest legs I've ever seen, completely unable to stand without leaning his weight onto Christopher. He somehow manages to fake his way to an Irish whip but he's a man drowning out there with nothing to lean on. I think he was supposed to get one more piece of offense off that whip, but the man literally couldn't stand on his own, so Christopher called an audible and spiked him with a gross DDT and then dropped a guillotine legdrop to an unmoving Kid

I pointed out Kid's obviously rubberized legs during the finishing sequence, but there were several smaller moments in the match where he looked wobbly. The pescado, the way he moved before tossing Christopher up with a backdrop. 

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Found Footage Friday: ANDRE~! JUMBO~! KI~! NECRO~! CORNETTE~! A FLAIR~! LAWLER~! BABA~! TAUE~! CHRISTOPHER~!

Andre the Giant/Giant Baba vs. Jumbo Tsuruta/Akira Taue AJPW RWTL 11/20/90 - EPIC

MD: Instead of reviewing this, I just want to list all the cool moments. At this point it'd been almost a year since Taue and Baba wrestled each other and Taue grew a lot in 90. He'd throw headbutts at Baba only to eat the brain chop. He'd come back with the palm strikes against the ropes and hit Baba with his own Russian Leg Sweep, only to piss Baba off so he hit him with one of his own. It had been a year (the last RWTL) since Jumbo fought Baba and the crowd buzzed huge when Jumbo tagged in. Early on, Jumbo put on the breaks so Baba couldn't get him with the big boot and Baba gave him a sort of "Aw, shucks" expression.

Then there was Andre, who only faced Jumbo or Taue a handful of times in his career. Taue tried to hit him with an enziguiri but could only get to the middle of his back. Jumbo tried to knock him over with a shoulder block and recoiled with as much over the top selling as I've ever seen out of him (it was warranted). Then Jumbo and Taue combined with a double jumping knee to trap Andre in the ropes but failed utterly to double suplex him. After the aforementioned Baba/Taue exchange, Taue was actually able to slam Baba, though he could have milked it more. Unfortunately, then Andre came in and manhandled him (being Taue!) like he was a child. Andre returned the favor from Jumbo's selling, recoiling from Tsuruta's punches and even going down (though he did toss him on the kick out), and then Taue ran into Andre's fist in the most glorious way possible. They finally got that double suplex, but on Baba, but he was able to ultimately survive the onslaught and tag Andre. Then Taue tried to waistlock him as he was going to German Suplex him and paid for it just like you'd expect.

See, all cool stuff. There was a pretty good match in there too, but that's a lot of cool stuff for a fifteen minute video and a ten minute match.

ER: Man this was awesome. This is the biggest bumping Andre performance of the 90s, and I'm not sure how far back into the 80s you'd have to go to find a match where he bumped more, but it's pretty far. It's amazing. To think, they aired the Andre/Baba RWTL '90 match against The Land of Giants, but their match against the Funks, this match, and the drool worthy Abdullah/Kimala II match all happened on house shows. This show was not officially taped, but was a house show the size of a TV taping, and obviously our intrepid cameraman saw how important this was. I'm so glad he did. I've gotten used to seeing inactive Andre performances, and seeing just how much he can add to a match with as little movement as possible, relying on body language and his incomparable selling and acting. There is so much to gleam from minimalist Andre, that seeing him get in and out of the ring multiple times and taking 4-5 bumps is downright shocking. When he and Baba entered the ring and I saw how Andre was pulling himself up onto the apron and climbing the turnbuckle rungs like a ladder to get the rest of his body upright, I assumed this was going to be a lot of Andre punching people from the ring apron. I've seen plenty of matches where just getting into the ring past the ring ropes looked like Andre pushing a boulder up a mountain, and I'm always excited to see how he can integrate his body's pain into a match. Instead, he made this into so much more. 

There were still great apron Andre moments, like the way he kicked at Taue's foot when Taue was breaking a submission, but I was surprised at how much Andre did in the ring. He worked really well with both Jumbo and Taue, and that first showdown with Jumbo felt special. I loved how Andre sold for Jumbo, how their first exchange went so much differently from their later showdown. When Andre squares off with Jumbo for the first time, Jumbo comes barreling in with a shoulderblock that hits a wall and sends Jumbo recoiling back into the ropes, and when he tries it against Andre just grabs him by the neck and face and squeezes, then blasts him with a headbutt. When a weaker Andre squares off with Jumbo late in the match, it's all about Andre's selling. I loved how Andre staggered around for Jumbo's hard elbow smashes. Andre is a man with somehow impeccable balance, who is able to sell as if he's a man with no center of gravity, always in danger of toppling over. Jumbo hits him with a couple elbows and sends Andre staggering, and Andre has to lunge for the ropes just to dodge Jumbo's big knee. The dodge does not deter Jumbo, and seeing that Andre is still staggered, he knocks him to the mat with a definitive elbow smash. It's wild to see Andre getting knocked down by a strike, and I couldn't even guess the last time it happened before this. 

Taue/Andre was fun in a different way, as Taue is the young punk (I like how a young punk in All Japan is someone who has wrestled almost 500 matches) who boldly fires off shots against the biggest man in Nagoya. I thought the Taue enziguiri looked great, catching Andre in the base of his neck (Andre sold it perfectly, like he just got punctured by a larger than average mosquito), then throwing a couple of jumping knees into Andre's torso before sending Andre careening backwards into the ropes with Jumbo's help. Andre had a great look of panic while stuck in the ropes, and was freed relatively quickly so that Jumbo and Taue could try an ill-advised tandem suplex. I loved how Andre dropped to his butt to block the suplex, as it made the suplex look that much more threatening. Andre did not frequently wind up on the mat during his All Japan run (he winds up on the mat more in this match than in several other available Andre AJ matches combined), so him willingly dropping to the mat only made it look like Jumbo and Taue were *that* close to suplexing him. 

I know I'm focusing a lot on Andre, but I thought this was a tremendous Baba match too. Really, it was a tremendous Everybody match, but I digress. Baba had some fun small stuff with Taue to start, giving Taue a great oldhead "okay, okay!" look after Taue backs him into the ropes and chops him. He does a slick armdrag takedown of Taue and works the headscissors, then later breaks out a rolling ankle pick on Jumbo, rolling down Jumbo's leg from a hammerlock to force Jumbo's momentum forward. It's always weird fun watching first couple years matches from guys like Taue or Tamon Honda, as they have 100% different movesets than during their peak years, and it's barely like watching an early version of the same wrestler, it's more like watching a completely different guy. Taue does Jumbo kneelifts instead of big running kicks, hits Baba with a bodyslam/elbowdrop/legdrop combo that he completely dropped, even throws a great lariat that I don't remember him using past 1992. I loved their dueling side Russian legsweeps (a move that always looks like it might cause Baba to shatter), and how Taue and Jumbo pulled off the tandem suplex on Baba, then took turns seeing who could hit him with a harder lariat (jury is out, both Taue and Jumbo really aimed to wreck their boss). Taue has Baba on the ropes and keeps that energy when Andre tags in, and it goes terribly for him. Taue chops away on Andre until Andre has had enough, then just shoves Taue into the corner and triumphantly squishes him over and over again, whips him into Baba's boot, and then drops that elbow. You can see Andre digging that elbow into Taue's chest as he presses down on his sternum with his palm, making sure the punk stays down. Another 90s Andre classic.

Jerry Lawler/Brian Christopher vs. David Flair/Jim Cornette 3/31/2002

MD: There's a moment in here where David has Lawler backed in the corner and lays in some punches. He'd developed pretty decent ones at some point and Lawler might be the best guy in the history of wrestling when it comes to sympathetically taking offense in the corner. I've seen him as an old man build matches over the last couple of years just around that. Anyway, afterwards, Flair goes over to Cornette and eagerly asks if he did good before getting nailed from behind and stooging. That, right there, was probably David's ceiling, but it was a very effective moment. David looking for fatherly acceptance from Russo or whatever obviously didn't work, but a couple of years and a number of matches later, with Cornette in that role? That might have had some legs.

Having Christopher in there (and I have to admit, he sort of felt like 80s Greg Gagne, after he'd already had some success, teaming with Verne) makes you think that David's best was sort of as a poor man's version of him. Where he stood out the most wasn't trying to be Ric Flair but the slightly off-kilter stooging, just how Christopher was best as an over-the-top stooge. Still, he had a pretty decent cut off punch and got some heat with pile drivers. He also took a neckbreaker in an ugly manner. Bumping just wasn't his strong suit. It didn't need to be here, though, since Cornette carried a ton of weight: with the pre-course promo, with the super padded trunks, by trying to coach instead of wrestle until Christopher tossed him in, by getting shaken up and tagging Lawler hilariously, by using the powder and getting believable shots in on the outside. This was pretty close to the whole Cornette experience and the Lawler family knew how to get the most out of it.

ER: This was great, and really there was only one reason to think this wasn't going to be great, but it's a pretty important reason. That said, this is probably the most complete I have ever seen David Flair look in a wrestling ring. Flair is a complete unnatural ("The Unnatural" would be a really funny gimmick for someone like Renegade or Flair to have worked), a guy who looks like he's never moved athletically in his life, who always took the weirdest bumps while having no idea what to do with his body on offense. Here, more than any other awful David Flair performance I've seen, he knew exactly what to do. Before the match, Cornette got on the mic and talked a lot of great hyperbolic BS about how "David Flair is going to be the best wrestler of the 21st century!" And, you know, I gotta say there are nothing but fascinating matches from the last 100 matches of Flair's career, so maybe he was onto something Has anyone here seen any of the Puerto Rico, All Japan, or even remember if the TNA stuff was any good? Any lucky souls get to see Regal/Flair in South Carolina, taped as a Velocity dark match? I hate how I'm talking myself into seeing more David Flair. 

My favorite part of this was how everyone got to show off their right hands, and honestly, every person in this match had a good right hand. Lawler having a good right hand won't surprise you, and he used it well here (including blindsiding Flair with a right before dropping to his knees with a fistdrop), and Cornette at this point is someone who is established as having a great right hand. But they aren't the ones who throw the most punches in this match. We get two actual punch outs between Christopher and Flair, and they were good! They each showed a bit of light on two of them, but the form of Flair was what stood out the most. This was a man who, just a couple years before, did not have good form on ANYthing. And here he is throwing actual punches to the chin and jaw, not cheating by trying to throw them past Christopher's head or doing that weird Abyss punch where he sands the top of their head. David Flair was throwing actual worked punches in 2002, and they were good. He has a nice gutwrench slam and an even better pair of piledrivers, and you can color me impressed. He still looked like he couldn't really bump, taking a neckbreaker like a baby wiggling in his high chair to avoid the mashed carrots. Also, I love how Cornette was the biggest bumper in the entire match. Every piece of Cornette shtick was great, like tagging out to Lawler after getting punched around by Christopher. Cornette even took a big bump to the floor, and all of his big back bumps to sell punches were perfect. I always love how good Cornette is at bumping despite looking like, well, a guy who would be filmed berating a Wendy's employee.  

Low-Ki vs. Necro Butcher JAPW 5/19/07 - EPIC

PAS: This is honestly one of the great all time match ups in wrestling history. I am not sure how I had no idea they wrestled in JAPW in addition to the two IWA-MS classics the year before and the fun brawl a few years later in IWA-EC. Having this show up is like finding a new Santo vs. Casas or Lawler vs. Dundee match. Necro is really the perfect opponent for Ki: he is willing to meet his recklessness and stiffness with recklessness and stiffness of his own. Ki throws full force kicks to his head, and Necro responds with hard shoot punches to the jaw, just sick stuff both ways. FUTEN shit. There is a moment where Ki lands a double stomp on Necro's back and you can see his spine invert. Necro punches his way out of the Warriors Way double stomp and hits a crazy looking top rope rana. They do the thumbtacks spot with Necro getting Irish whipped and stepping on them with his bare feet. It is an incredible spot the first time you see it, but Necro went back to the well a couple of times with it. Still that is a minor complaint for an otherwise hellacious monster of a match.

MD: This was as good of a brawl-with-plunder 2000s match as you'll find, really, two guys who just threw everything they had at each other and did everything they could to prevent the other from doing the same. Violence and struggle from beginning to end. What made this better was that it was at St. Joseph's gym, with a priest obviously holding the keys to letting JAPW run there and getting to do the ring introductions in turn. So, he got to introduce Necro with his "Choose Death" shirt. That's as pro wrestling as you get basically. You can almost imagine Fat Frank reassuring the guy it was okay because Ki was going over so it was a parable about good vs. evil, with good overcoming the excesses of evil...or something. I especially appreciated the fight out of the Warrior's Way set-up because Necro had previously sort of sat around draped on the top rope for the double stomp. It was a great double stomp, but that had seemed a bit off given the match they were having. The fact he refused to allow such a thing to happen again was great and pulled me right back in. It was the sort of a match where the announcers and the crowd would go just as nuts for Necro taking the Cactus Jack plunge through a table as they would for something like Ki hitting a power drive elbow on the floor. Agreed with Phil on the thumbtacks spot, though it obviously worked for the crowd on that night and they used it effectively in setting up the finish. Necro probably went to that well as often as he did because it protected him in a loss.

ER: Athletically, these two couldn't be much more different. Low Ki has maybe the best body control in American wrestling history (I used to say "in wrestling history" but all of our unearthed French Catch footage kind of popped that balloon) and Necro Butcher wrestles like the proverbial bull in a china shop. It's one of wrestling's great juxtapositions, and they meet in the middle with stiffness. Necro takes so many kicks in this match, all to the body and head, and no matter how many times he punches back at Ki and sticks digs his fingers into Ki's mouth, nose, and eyes, those kicks keep coming. I loved Ki kicking Necro right in the eye, causing Necro to get stuck in the ropes like a death match Andre. Necro has a lot of fun ways to fight back, seems like he was always punching while off balance, from his knees, from his back, even hanging upside down. But I thought what set this apart wasn't just the stiffness, it was the way they each sold strikes and how they each fought for offense. A Necro punch is always a great thing, but when Ki slips out of a powerbomb and gets decked right after, Ki - limp bodied - bounces and flops down to the mat while hitting every rope on the way down, and that's just wrestling perfection. When Necro tries to powerbomb Ki into a table, Ki tries to fight out, making Necro fight against physics to re-lift Ki and finally drop to his knees with a powerbomb. when Ki goes for the Warriors Way, he tries to keep Necro in the tree of woe by grinding his boot into Necro's kneecap, causing Necro to reflexively punch up at Ki until he breaks. Necro getting run barefoot through the thumbtacks is a great way to set up offense, distracting Necro long enough to shotgun dropkick him through a table. Their stiffness was often used as a means to distract, not as a means to an end, and I think that's something that really elevates their feud to all time status. Monsta Mack's screeching Chicken Lady impression over every single awesome part of the match couldn't hold this one back. 

COMPLETE AND ACCURATE ANDRE

COMPLETE AND ACCURATE LAWLER

COMPLETE AND ACCURATE LOW KI

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WWF Raw 2/9/98: A Good Episode of Wrestling TV

I threw on this episode of Raw because I wanted to see the cruiser tag, but I found myself captivated by what looked like a top to bottom rock solid pro wrestling card. Every match looked fun on paper, figured I would dive back into my teens.

Jeff Jarrett/Barry Windham vs. Legion of Doom WWF Raw 2/9/98

ER: How did I not remember the killer fast working cutthroat big bumping tag team of Jeff Jarrett and Barry Windham? I very much remember the bad NWA reboot, but forgot we got actual cool tag teams with them, where Jarrett looked flat out the best he ever looked (work wise, look wise, everything). This is a flat out 1985 NWA tag match taking place on 1998 WWF TV, and it's great. Windham and Jarrett were an awesome team that didn't get enough of a chance, and this whole tag played like a stiff old guy brawl. LOD and Windham are all 38 and up, which was old for this era WWF. But Hawk worked stiff the whole match, dropping Windham with a heavy Thesz press and punching him right in the ear, and later throwing chops to Jarrett that looked like backhands right across Jarrett's face. Windham bumped around for LOD but also gave right back, hitting a couple great lariats and his best punch of the match right on the floor while close to some fans. The crowd was lit up for LOD the whole match. Neither Hawk or Animal were working any complicated power spots here, but they were working quick and throwing themselves into punches and shoulderblocks. Hawk took a really nasty bump for the finish, charging into the ringpost and falling to the floor. The crowd was already into LOD, just two big dudes in face paint running into people would have been enough, but Hawk is out here taking bumps like this. Cornette comes out and we get a hard racket shot, and Bradshaw runs out and looks as pissed and dangerous as peak Stan Hansen. this was great TV tag wrestling.

Pierre vs. Henry Godwinn

ER: A slow burning hoss battle and a rare singles match appearance from 1998 Pierre, who takes several crazy bumps. Both guys hit hard, really swinging limbs into each other, and Pierre kicks things up a notch with a bonkers no hands tope that falls a little short, so the big man just does a gigantic belly flop to the floor. Godwinn takes a nice spill to the floor, too, but here's Pierre taking a big lariat over the top to the floor, missing a huge in ring cannonball, and getting super height on a backdrop. They kept a real pace here, really filling the minutes with a lot more movement than I expected from two tag guys. This was a big man's match where the misses were just important as the hits, and both landed heavy.

Pantera/Brian Christopher vs. Taka Michinoku/Aguila

ER: This show is an easy 3 for 3 so far. This match got 6 big minutes and everyone here made the most of those minutes. Pantera gets catapulted over the top and gets big air before crashing hard, and then Christopher gets backdropped to the floor, with Pantera taking a somersault bump into him after getting dropkicked off the apron. Aguila hits a killer corkscrew plancha, Taka hits one of his breathtaking no hands springboard planchas; this was a hot freaking match and the crowd was reacting well. Christopher had a long heel control segment on Aguila that was real good, and I forgot how strong the reactions were for Aguila. There's a great moment where Christopher narrowly ducks a high arcing, 2/3 across the ring Aguila moonsault press, and Aguila grazes vertically over the top of him and lands belly first on the mat. The finish was a great Memphis finish, with Christopher digging in under his balls to pull out a fake weapon, and Pantera shoving the crotch weapon into the nose of his mask. Pantera leaps off the middle buckle right into Taka, and Taka bumps as if he just got hit in the face with a sock of nickels. High end WWF cruiser match for the time. Pantera had this incredible 6 match run in 1998, bounced, then came back for more a year later. I'd love to know who was asking about Pantera every year.  

Ken Shamrock/Chainz vs. The Rock/Faarooq

ER: I really liked Chainz here, he of arguably the dumbest WWF wrestling name of 1998. But he hit with big clubbing hands to the side of Rock's ear, took a nice Nation beatdown, and took a big bump over the top and into the guardrail. Faarooq had a nice powerslam and took Shamrock's sillier MMA strikes (he still hadn't figured out punches, but his kicks were thrown nicely), and Shamrock hits a really cool standing rana. Rock stooged around nicely and took advantage of cheating with such confidence, he was really operating at peak heel power already. House show Rock was probably amazing during this period. The match ends with a DQ when Rock absolutely obliterates Shamrock's brain cells with a chairshot. Good lord. Rock swings a chair right into the flat of the forehead and this was a 19 fucking 98 chairshot indeed.

Steve Blackman vs. Recon

ER: This ruled. Blackman does a bunch of karate blocks and chops and a big armdrag, and suddenly the Truth Commission's (genuinely great, almost John Carpenter influenced) music starts up and Jackal gets lowered from the ceiling speaking over the house mic from a podium. He cuts this wild Jim Jones promo about how the WWF fears him, and Blackman and Recon bizarrely have a match like they have no idea it's going on. They don't stop once to look over at Jackal's sermon, just continue having a very normal (and very fun) match. It's so weird!! Blackman comes off as a more interesting worker than Shamrock at this point (though he has no crowd connection whatsoever. He steadfastly refuses to acknowledge anybody other than his opponent), and here he's awesomely and robotically going through every single move he knows, landing weird elbow drops, high spinkicks, a fast sunset flip, and finishing with a cool rings of Saturn variation. The whole presentation of this was strange in a great way.

Goldust vs. Thrasher

ER: This is the late 90s, and so Goldust is dressed as Marilyn Manson (and really is wearing almost the exact same gear Charly Manson would later use), and we have to hear JR obnoxiously call him "Marilyn Manson Dust" the entire match. I hated how he said it every time. Mare-uhh-lenn MAN-sun Dust. We don't get too many Thrasher singles matches, and this is a unique match up, and a Goldust singles match is almost always going to work even if it's Goldust working with a stupid wig. They do oddly get mixed up on who is supposed to be the heel, with Mosh choking Goldust from the floor and Goldust getting a babyface comeback right after. But this match had Goldust throwing several great punches, Thrasher hitting a cool springboard back elbow, a nice Goldust hotshot on the barricade, the kind of stuff I wanted to see.

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On Brand Segunda Caida: 90s Terry Funk

Branding Iron Match: Terry Funk vs. Virgil NWC 2/11/95

ER: Funk had a really fun formula for these 90s indy matches, and it's a formula that really gives the crowd their money's worth. He really makes sure he does a ton of stuff on all sides of the ring and even into the crowd, really giving so many of the fans an up close shot of a legend acting like a lunatic. Funk comes out with his large open flame branding iron and is literally waving it inches from peoples' faces, jamming it at the ring announcer, chasing ref Jesse Hernandez around ringside with it, almost lighting his own hair on fire rolling into the ring with it, constantly looking like a man going through with a completely terrible idea. And then he stooges around the whole damn building for Virgil. 

The match opens with Funk taking a punch from Virgil and falling off the apron through the timekeeper's table. The match literally starts with a table spot, and we brawl through the crowd from there. Chairs get thrown (and they're those solid as hell hotel conference event chairs), Funk takes spills over the ropes, gets hung up in the ropes, elbows the promoter in the head, literally hits a fan that gets too close (and if it was a plant it was extremely well done as Funk got him and then security from all over the building swarmed in and they never went back to it), throws garbage cans all over the place after emptying them, gets busted open (with the announcer regularly noting that Funk was covered in blood and ketchup and mustard), hits a big piledriver on the floor, staggers straight off the apron, eats two nasty DDTs from Virgil, just total chaos. 

The finish is overdone, but played well by Funk. He gets locked in the million dollar dream and headbutts the ref to get out of it, then wallops Virgil with the branding iron. Promising the loser getting BRANDED is an absolutely ridiculous stipulation, as who is going to actually get branded!? But Funk brands Jesse Hernandez who sells it as well as you can sell getting your flesh pretend burnt. This was not a great Virgil performance (and nowhere near as good as his genuinely great WCW heel run) but obviously Funk was going to show up. We even get a fun JYD appearance at the end (NWC was the home of the very last JYD matches) and he blasts Funk right in the chest with a hard lariat.

Terry Funk vs. Mark Henry WWF Raw 6/1/98

ER: This match is so cool, and one of the first genuinely good matches of Mark Henry's career. Sometime around March '98 things clearly began to click for Henry. His Raw match against Owen was legitimately his best performance to that point in his career, but he was also a standout in his six man tag at Unforgiven, and looked like a monster in a Shotgun squash against Jeff Hardy.  

This is Terry Funk crafting a tight 5 minute match around a still limited opponent, with Henry shining right at the moments he needed to. Lawler was obviously the expert at these matches (there's a reason so many people were sharing his King Kong Bundy matches after Bundy passed) but he's 53 year old Funk taking it to a massive Olympian. There are moments where you can see Funk guiding Henry through things, but they happen early and by the time this match gets going Henry looks like a natural. Funk dishes out chops and a neckbreaker, then more chops and another neckbreaker...except he instead heel kicks Henry in the balls while standing with the neckbreaker. Ridiculous. 

This gets really crazy when they go to the floor, as Funk tries a Vader bomb from the middle rope to the floor (!), but gets caught by Henry and slammed into the ringpost. Very unexpected. Henry takes an awesome bump tumbling into the ring steps head first, and Funk does arguably the craziest thing he did during this WWF run when he hits an Asai moonsault on Henry, crashing with almost ALL of his weight directly into the guardrail. I mean holy shit. His hip and leg just smashed into the railing, and Henry actually sold the impact perfectly, knowing to sell it as a graze and not as a KO. Lawler's, "He's 53! How many 106 year olds do you know?!" response to JR's "middle aged and crazy" quip is genuinely funny, but seriously this spot was pure insanity. Henry had to have zero experience catching a moonsault, so this was the natural result of that, but I also think the spot worked better because Funk crashed and burned so hard.. Truly nuts. Back in the ring we get a hard shoulderblock with both slamming into each other, Funk going flying, but Henry merely staggering. The smack on that collision was LOUD, and I dug Henry's elbowdrop, his legdrop that showed no light and perfect form, and his two standing splashes. It was super impressive seeing how fast Henry could scramble to his feet, serious quickness, and I really loved how these two matched up. At this point Funk wasn't really being put in a position to carry young talent in a match, and it was awesome to see that he could still craft a cool match around a talented but green opponent who had major unique abilities.

 

Terry Funk/Bradshaw vs. Too Much WWF Shotgun 7/14/98

ER: You knew this was going to be a mauling, and it was a fun one. Bradshaw honestly may have been at his best in '98/'99, as his work may have gotten somewhat smarter a few years later, but he lost a lot of that intensity and energy. He was super imposing and moved really quick, so he could have fast exchanges with smaller guys like Scott Taylor, all while it was obvious that the quick exchange was going to end with Taylor getting flattened. This was a lot of Too Much stooging, which, of course that's what it was going to be dummy, and it was great seeing those two stooge while getting occasionally punched. I think the most offense they got was a couple of tandem dropkicks on Bradshaw, and an eyerake to set those up, but there was so much movement that it never felt like an outright squash, even though 95% of this was dominated by Funk & Bradshaw. Brian Christopher takes three big bumps to the floor, Scott gets to throw a couple nice punches at Funk's jaw, Funk locks Taylor in a rolling abdominal stretch that sees Christopher running after them in circles not knowing how to stop it, all great stuff. I really liked Funk hitting a southpaw lariat to send Christopher over the top, and Bradshaw during this era really carried himself like a guy who I desperately would have sought out in All Japan and later NOAH. I like Bobby Duncum Jr., but damn Bradshaw would have been so much cooler in late 90s All Japan than Duncum. The clothesline from hell was a clothesline that should finish a match, and both of these teams ruled.

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New Footage Friday: Lawler, Rude, PG-13, Rich, Dougie, Koko, Bruno, Baron, Bruiser, Ladd

Dick The Bruiser/Bruno Sammartino vs. Ernie Ladd/Baron von Raschke WWA 8/25/73

PAS: This was a no DQ match with Sam Menacker the play by play announcer as the special referee. Apparently according to Cagematch the Bruiser/Bruno tag team was called Annihilation Inc. which is a hilariously Progress Wrestling tag name for the early 70s. This a pretty great big star tag match with Bruno and Bruiser walloping the heels and Heenan running around bumping and getting in the mix. It was kind of odd to see Bruno take a subsidiary role, he is usually such a titanic force, but he was definitely the B-Side of the tag team. Bruiser is a trip, super expressive with some fun Stooges spots, including making Ladd punch himself. Finish was wild with Heenan splitting Menacker open with a foreign object and the heel working over both faces with the ring microphone, kind of odd to have such a non-finish in a no-DQ match but it certainly got the crowd into an appropriate lather.

MD: Where to even begin on this one? Apparently Bruno and Dick the Bruiser were called Annihilation, Inc. I sort of loved Bruiser here. He was far enough along that he could be a big ham, but not so far along that he had become a self-parody like he would into the 80s. Bruno might have been the outside attraction but Bruiser was the guy who was the most over with this crowd. He had this way of adding an extra pause to everything, almost freezing time for just a little too long to be believable but just long enough to transcend belief, to push it from faux realism to borderline mythic.

The heel side here was great. Ladd was just larger than life, with an athleticism he'd lose later. He threw himself into Bruno's punches and back out with the bumps. He had this way of maximize his physical presence, not just on offense, but on selling, taking up as much space as possible to get over his writhing and pain, especially by the ropes and on the apron. I also love the idea of a guy so big needing to utilize a loaded thumb gimmick. There's something underhanded and insulting about that. The Baron was more chickenshit than you might expect. I think he was back body dropped about fifteen times in the match.

Menacker was all over this match as the special referee. It was no dq, so he was mainly there to stop Heenan from overtly interfering. If this was a title match or something more serious, it would have grated, but as an over the top tag, it fit perfectly, really didn't take any heat or credit away from the babyfaces, and the fans loved it.

ER: This was a blast and there's so much to cover that I'm not sure where to begin. I haven't seen any Bruiser or Crusher from when either were closer to their peak, so it was wild seeing Bruiser getting reactions like he was all four Beatles in 1964. Every time he would move an inch he would get wild shrieks from the fans, it was insane. I'm not sure I've seen a large crowd in love with a wrestler this much, pure adulation. He clearly loved soaking it up, but I just couldn't get over how much people screamed when he would do something as simple as go for a pinfall (imagine if Bruiser was in the USWA 10 man below, just doing pinfalls! The event would sound like an absolute massacre with all the constant screaming). Due to Bruiser's impossibly huge popularly, Bruno really could have been any man. I don't think I've ever seen a legend as big as Bruno so clearly relegated to second banana status, sheerly due to the popularity of someone he's teaming with. Imagine Hogan and Rock teaming in 2002 and seeing fans flip out for Rock and then look at Hogan as someone who is standing in front of the Rock and could he please move because we can't see the Rock when you're standing there. Bruno is the cute sheep wandering back into frame in front of the cutest sheep in the petting zoo.

The heels basically stooged for 20 straight minutes, which is fine by me. Ernie Ladd looked gargantuan. Obviously the guy is big, but he looked like freaking Andre here. He also took 3 bumps over the top to the floor, was made to punch his own face by Bruiser (and bumped big for it) and was a real great foil for Bruiser. Baron isn't really a great bumper, he has a long awkward body and falls more like 2010 Akira Taue, if Taue was also constantly getting a chair pulled out from under him. But those bumps work tremendously well in a stooge setting, buckling at the waist from kicks to the stomach, falling on his butt after big punches, taking a ton of backdrops, all of it great. Two different times he does this awesome apron pratfall: He's standing on the apron and takes a shot, and his legs fan out so he's basically doing the splits heels first on the apron, holding onto the top rope while his butt is hanging over the floor, before dropping to the floor. The second time he did this bump was when he was holding Bruiser prone and Ladd naturally accidentally clocks him, just an all time great pratfall. Heenan is fantastic at ringside, kicking at officials, running in with sneaky and not so sneaky punches, causing total chaos and distraction, introducing a ringside microphone cord to choke Sam Menacker and others; Menacker got a couple little Walking Tall moments too, got to slide Baron's foot off the ropes during a pinfall, stuff the fans could get into. This was great, real crowd pleaser. Nobody went home disappointed by this one.

Jerry Lawler vs. Rick Rude CWA 8/27/84

PAS: This is from a commercial video tape of USWA cage matches and seems to have fallen through the cracks, no other reviews, didn't make the DVDVR Memphis set, etc. This was worked kind of like a Bruno cage match with Lawler beating the bricks off of Rude for much of the match. Lawler laying in punches to someone is going to be always worth watching and Rude took an appropriate pasting. I am never going to be down with no-selling a piledriver and one of the great things about the Lawler hulk up, is how he remained vulnerable during it, popping up after a piledriver is the opposite of that. Still despite that this was a pretty heated brawl and really fun discovery.

MD: This was just a mauling. Every wrestler in his mid-20s should probably have to take ten minutes of Lawler's offense in a cage while the crowd gets more and more into it. It builds character. Rude already had a lot here, though, and you can hardly belief this is the same guy that started the year off as a bland babyface in Mid-South. I love his attempts to escape, especially the ones that are futile, either trying to go under the cage or in between the two slats. He wanted nothing to do with any of this and it's glorious. His little bit of offense comes late in the match, almost entirely because of Lawler's own hubris, mostly groin-related and wholly appropriate to his character. The no-sell on the pile-driver is fine because Lawler was still so fresh you figure he knows his to protect himself. It's worth it as the place comes unglued with the strap. It wasn't a spot he overused and here it meant a ton. Nice, refreshing violence with Rude coming off as a guy who deserved the comeuppance he received.

PG-13/Spellbinder/Tex Slazenger/Brian Christopher vs. Tommy Rich/Doug Gilbert/Jesse James Armstrong/Tracy Smothers/Koko B Ware USWA 2/6/96

ER: This match was plenty fun and also so so so so so stupid. It's a USWA vs. SMW 10 man anything goes tornado cage match, most pinfalls in 30 minutes wins. If you knew that info, and didn't even know the participants, you'd know that you'd want to see it. And then you see the names. PG-13! Tommy Rich! Smothers! Thicccc affffff KOKO! And then you realize that this is on USWA's home turf so PG-13 and Brian Christopher are working babyface, and you know this is going to be 8 stars. This match seemed too big to fail. These 10 names, in a cage, weapons, anything goes, the easiest win. The match doesn't even go the full 30, comes out to more like 22 minutes, just more condensed violence right?

And then they go and have almost SEVENTY PINFALLS in 22 minutes. That is not a typo. This was a match almost wholly comprised of pinfalls. Every back bump a guy took, that guy would get pinned. This started happening in the 2nd minute of the match, and kept going until the very end, when they hilariously tried to build drama with a last minute kickout. The kickout was absolutely hilarious, a genuine laugh out loud moment, because it was literally the ONLY kickout that happened the entire match. This was a match that had some guy getting pinned in some part of the ring literally every 15 seconds, and most of the match guys would be waiting in pinfalls for waaaaaay too long while a ref finished counting another pinfall at some other part of the ring. The pinfalls were so plentiful that the ref finally just stopped getting down to count some of them. The pinfall kickout was so hilarious because it made me desperately want JC Ice to yell out "Wait...THAT'S an option!?" Whoever it was that kicked out (video is pretty washed out and guys frequently are blocking other guys) was like the first ape in 2001 to learn how to use bones as tools/weapons. More guys got hit with a hubcap AND a cowbell than kicked out of any move. There were more referees in this match than there were kickouts. It was awful. The participants clearly were working under the rules of "Anything Goes, 'Cept Kickouts".

This was the worst All Japan battle royal I've ever seen. Now granted, the All Japan battle royal is one of my favorite gimmick matches, and they always leave a ton of room for personality to shine through. This is like if someone watched a couple of All Japan battle royals, and came away thinking the key to those being fun was the pinfalls. Or a computer noted when the biggest pops occurred on a card and determined that people cheer loudest during ring entrances and winning pinfalls, so the computer spit out some dot matrix paper stating that the most successful crowd reaction would be for a match that is only ring entrances and pinfalls. And for all the guys in the ring, and all the potential action that was happening, and all the guys spending more time on their backs than all the whores in Tennessee, we spend the whole match in a real tight shot from a ringside handheld camera. A match with this match participants needs some distance to put everything into scope, to follow the action. Watching this much action in a tight frame is like showing up late to the movies and having to sit in the front row, needing to turn left and right to follow action across the screen. 

Even with an entire, match long constantly annoying series of pinfalls, there were some small, tiny gold nuggets in this. Maybe not super nice gold, maybe tooth gold, but still it would be impossible to put these 10 guys into any pro wrestling situation and not get *something* out of it. These 10 guys have good enough schtick that you could have made this a "Hands Tied Behind Back, Must Wrestle on Knees" match and it probably would have turned out better than this. But still, there were moments. Tommy Rich looked like a guy who I want to see in more (better) multiman garbage brawls; it was fun seeing PG-13 as babyfaces, their usual (wonderful) schtick being cheered wildly instead of booed; Christopher hits a big dive off the top to the floor, Dougie hits people with a chair, Koko clonks a few guys with a cowbell and drops someone with the ghostbuster, I thought Jesse James actually showed a ton of charisma and was always super active, and we get a cool spirited post match run in with some skinny dirtbag guy in cut offs talking a ton of shit, Miss Texas eating a piledriver from Koko, and coming off far more violent than anything in the actual match. I cannot imagine a worse match featuring all 10 of these guys. I mean seriously put these exact 10 guys in ANY match other than this one, run that fucking simulation a thousand times, and I just can't picture it being worse than what we got here. Literally any singles match combination from those 10 names would have been better. Pick the least enticing singles match (Jesse James vs. Spellbinder?) and I'm positive it would be better than what we got. This was improbably awful. There's no way this match should have been this bad.

MD: Yeah, look, I don't even know what to say about this. Eric's got it covered, right? Ok, I do sort of occasionally enjoy how malleable the rules of wrestling can be. There are norms that everyone agrees upon and when people break those norms, it has the potential to screw up everything for everyone, because it shatters the social contract that allows for suspension of disbelief. Sometimes, however, you can be in a situation so unique that the norms don't apply. Old Survivor Series matches kind of work like that. You can definitely get eliminated on a bodyslam in an old Survivor Series match. This sort of had the makings of that. You had two companies feuding. It was in a cage. It was falls count anywhere and no DQ and chaotic.

Still, this was absolutely nuts. They should have made it so one counts worked as falls. If normal marathon matches are the equivalent of soccer games, low scoring with a lot of defense and very much a test of endurance, this was a basketball game, with everyone hitting layups and running back across the court. There was some cumulative selling as things went on but it was dangerous because anytime you fell down for more than a second, you were going to get pinned. Maybe it was more like Pro Wrestling Calvinball. Of the things I'm fascinated by in this match, it's not really the structure or any specific spots or performances. I wonder how they convinced someone like Tommy Rich to get pinned fifteen times on tape. Was it because he was going to get to pin someone else fifteen times? You know these guys weren't getting paid much for this. How did they put this together? The announcers could barely keep track of the score. It sort of crescendoed to a final moment. It wasn't like a battle royal where you could remember the order of elimination. Somehow they got to where they were going, so more power to them, I guess.

Last thought, this was a cage match where the cage was solely used to corral the participants and keep them in an area. It served a purpose, pushing everyone together so closely that there'd be constant action and constant pinfalls, but it wasn't uesd in any other way.

PAS: This was a mess, such a cool looking match on paper, with all time great guys like Tommy Rich and PG13, plus awesome fun dudes like Koko and Doug Gilbert, hard to fuck it up, but they fucked it up. This reminded me of an All Japan Battle Royal, where Misawa would get knocked down and dog piled to get eliminated, those were light hearted undercard fodder, this was a main event with guys going down to eye rakes and bodyslams. USWA was always trying weird stuff, a lot of times it worked, this time it really didn't. We have very few arena matches from 90s Memphis, so I was amped when this turned up, it could have been left on the cutting room floor.

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Phil is a DAD!

Congratulations are in order as my great friend and writing partner, Phil Schneider, is now a father. His son, Daisuke Ikeda Schneider*, is a huge 9 lb. 5 oz. and is beautiful. Maybe some day we can do an Indy Fat Guy Investigation on young Daisuke. In honor of Phil now being a dad, here are reviews of a couple matches where fathers teamed with sons (and obviously, be sure to search around the blog for all the Rush/Pierroth matches I've written up). Congrats Phil!

Jerry Lawler & Too Much vs. Dustin Runnels, Bradshaw & Terry Funk WWF Shotgun 6/16/98 - GREAT

ER: Matt championed this one 5 years ago but I have zero memory of seeing this when it aired, and it really really stands out as unique when compared to other 1998 WWF TV matches. This show was taped in Austin, TX and I imagine that awesome face trios was put together specifically to take advantage of the Texas crowd. I'm so used to seeing WWE beat guys in their home town that it's so weird seeing three hosses  wrestling in the state they identify with, and it all goes exactly as it should go. Seeing Lawler as a heel this "late" in his career is really great, and really everybody in this match looks great. Taylor gets the misfortune of drawing Dustin and Bradshaw for the first part of the match, with Dustin throwing some nice armdrags and a sweet fist drop, then Bradshaw unleashing hell all over the ring with the nastiest clubbing blows you've seen and arguably the best corner clotheslines. Taylor just gets mauled here. Lawler is great on the apron always acting super amused by Too Much's antics, always smiling to the crowd while pointing to them (like he was saying "Right?! Aren't these guys great!?"). When he finally tags in (after Funk begs for him) we get Funk rushing Lawler with punches, Lawler playing the smart game and throwing some great shots, immediately piledriving Funk and then adding another one for good measure. Kevin Kelly puts over Lawler big here and Funk sells the piledrivers in a great Tenryu type way. Funk eventually roars back leading to a big Lawler bump to the floor and Funk banking Lawler's head off the announce table. Fans were flipping out for Funk and it was glorious. Funk being in 1998 WWF was just weird. Everybody gets time to shine in the match with Christopher playing the perfect stooge and bumping all over and the face hosses running through everyone in front of a super hot crowd. What a fun little gem of a TV match.

Dusty & Dustin Rhodes vs. Ted Dibiase & Virgil (WWE Royal Rumble 1/18/91)

ER: This match is definitely regarded as more of a famous angle - with Virgil finally turning on Dibiase - than a good match, but I really really liked the match. Dustin Rhodes was 19 and Virgil was kind of a stiff, but damn if it's not a fun and satisfying 10 minute tag. Ted Dibiase had my absolute favorite theme song when I was a kid, and only now do I realize that they just completely jacked the hook from Brother Louie. But it's still the best, and nobody knew how to walk to a ring like Million Dollar Man era Dibiase. That sequined suit, and that cocksure walk he had, with Virgil walking out in front of him, it always amazed me. Plus how cool does Dibiase look with the jacket off? Just sequined pants and dickey-with-bowtie. That Virgil himself takes off Dibiase's tearaway pants for him is the cherry on the sweetest sundae.  Dustin and Virgil actually work pretty great together here, with a couple fast exchanges, some fast rope running, a great Dustin leapfrog and a neat little roll through by Virgil that ended with Dustin throwing a great stomp to his face. Dustin really isn't far from being fully formed here, and I can't believe he's only 19, as that means he was only 23 as Goldust which is....okay I just always thought he was older and never did the math on it. His Dusty aping spots are understandable in this setting, and he doesn't have his great powerslam yet, but he's not too far from being Dustin Rhodes: Great Wrestler. But he does some neat things that he later abandoned, as the match hinged around him missing a big running knee in the corner. He leaps into it, plows knee first into the top buckle, and does some nice spots around trying to use that knee but it being too hurt. Dibiase as aggressive vet lion going in for the kill on wounded Dustin was awesome. He worked quick, like he had an appointment to get to but had to beat an ass first, yanked on Dustin's leg, dropped THEE greatest fistdrop, taunted Dusty, just some really great Dibiase moments. Virgil works a fun stiff, reckless style, Dusty is mostly out of this except for elbows and to eat the roll up pin, but there's a little bit of magic in this one. Plus it made me realize how much I miss the lens flare on these old PPVs, all of the colorful refracted beams from the hot ring lights shooting off pinks and blues and yellows, I just love it.


*Daisuke Ikeda Schneider mayyyy not be his son's real name. His real name is obviously one of the following:

1. David Richard Schneider
2. Shawn Michael Schneider
3. Charles Taylor Schneider

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