Segunda Caida

Phil Schneider, Eric Ritz, Matt D and occasional guests write about pro wrestling. Follow us @segundacaida

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

And I Don't Want to Know if Cassandro's Lonely/Don't Want to Know if He is Less Than Lonely

~Nygma/Polvo de Estrellas/Yuriko vs. Cassandro/Pasion Cristal/Pimpinela Escarlata (AAA, 4/10/08) - VERY GOOD

Boy the Night Queens are just the largest grab bag in all of exotico-based lucha libre. They range from being extremely fun to being the worst wrestlers you have ever seen. And they were completely not horrible at all in this match. Polvo looked really good here and really set up spots nicely, getting into good position. The other at least can eat a rana and do some cool garbage spots.

Cassandro completely owned this one, just running around like mad and hitting all kinds of awesome spots. His springboard huracanrana is a really a thing of beauty, and he had a great somersault tope (along with his always nutso ringpost bump). Pimpi had some great stuff here including an awesome bombs away butt drop off the top, and Pasion Cristal ranged from looking really crummy to really taking some nasty garbage spots. The Night Queens putting his head in a trash can, then missile drop kicking it was pretty great.

This match was really fun, but rather short. That might've been for the best, as too much stuff was going well all at once, we might've been pushing our luck to ask for more.

~Incognito/Mascara Ano Dos Mil Jr. vs. Cassandro/Hijo del Cien Caras (Promociones Wagner, 8/2/08) - SKIPPABLE

This match wasn't really all that bad, it was just filled with more hermanos antics (and not fun rudo antics, more lame finger poke of doom antics). Initially I was super disappointed, as the matchlist I had did not mention that these were the Dinamitas SONS. So I was salivating over the potential for Cien Caras beating down the Juarez Mystico, or Mascara Ano Dos Mil's undoubtedly AWESOME facials when Cassandro tried to kiss him, OR even the brothers going against EACH OTHER!! All sounded like incredible options.

But then the sons came out instead. I don't know if they're the real sons, but I'm assuming they're not. I mean, I hope they're not as they both appear to be in their mid 30s and don't have an ounce of their supposed fathers' talent.

So Cassandro and Incognito match up really nicely and Cassandro was able to work a bunch of cool spots and roll ups with him. It's not even so much that the jr. Dynamite Bros are bad...they're just really uninteresting. They let Cassandro and Incognito hit their spots, then one would just let the other pin him (they're on opposite teams! It's wacky!). Crowd seemed to genuinely want them to fight each other, but they wouldn't. By the 3rd caida they just started working as a team and the match ended when Cassandro and Incognito each got the pin on seemingly their own respective teammates. I really had no complaints about who was the legal man at that point, but was just hoping for a little more creatively. Maybe the brothers could've done some subtle dissension, like when Billy Zabka's teammate Bobby is told to do an illegal move to take Daniel out of the Karate Kid tournament, and he does it but is instantly remorseful. Bobby never understood why they were beating up Daniel so much. It wasn't HIS ex-girlfriend that had the hots for Daniel, it was Johnny's! So they're fucking dressed up like skeletons and beating the shit out of Daniel and Bobby's like "He's had enough Johnny" and fuck man, he probably didn't even WANT to do karate but maybe his parents got a divorce and he was a latchkey kid or something and he just wanted something to do in the afternoons to take his fucking mind off all the serious shit in his life, but then all that serious shit starts becoming JUST AS SERIOUS and he has to forfeit his own fucking place in the tourney all because Billy Zabka wants to square off in the finals against Daniel, at ANY cost. Ralph Macchio was 23 in that movie, by the way. What the fuck, right?

Cassandro looked really good here, but it just wasn't meant to be.

~Cassandro vs. Chuck Taylor (IWA-MS, 9/26/08) - FUN

I think this match is unfairly maligned by the internet fans of Cassandro. Cards on the table, Chuck Taylor is pretty bad most of the time. Sometimes he doesn't look as bad, namely when he's teaming up with the far worse dudes that make up Team F.I.S.T. He's not good, but he ain't anywhere near as bad as Icarus. Yeah, his brand of "wink into the camera" comedy that makes him the Ryan Reynolds of wrestling can get a little old a little fast, but I thought it worked quite nicely against Cassandro, a man who knows how to integrate comedy into and around his awesome wrestling.

Tracey Smothers was on commentary here which is entertaining beyond belief. Some of his asides were just awesome: "He's exotic and everything he is, but uh, he knows his stuff" or "I'm familiar with his stuff, but I've never seen him live". Cassandro IS exotic and everything he is! And the idea of Smothers being familiar with Cassandro's work before this tournament is just fucking rad. Smothers just sitting around watching random AAA dvds and saying, "Man this fucker is exotic and everything". It's a visual I want to have.

The match itself it really awesome when Taylor doesn't wrestle. Every time he tries to do something like a clubbing forearm it's just as ugly as ugly gets. But his comedy works really well here. Cassandro naturally wants his goods, and Taylor is great trying to avoid a mid-match makeout session. Hiding behind the ref, getting through the ropes, it's all fun but you know that kiss is inevitable. His post-kiss sell is really great, as while Cassandro has him in a leg lock he's alternating selling his leg with trying to wipe another man's saliva off his mouth. He also takes the "run face first into Cassandro's ass" corner spot really great. I praise Fit Finlay for always leaning right into punches, forearms, and kicks, and making them look way better than they should at it seems odd to praise Chuck Taylor for leaning into somebody's ass....but damn if Taylor didn't lean right the hell into Cassandro's ass to completely put over that awesome spot.

Cassandro has some troubles with the ultra loose ropes but totally makes up for it by hitting an absolutely insane somersault tope that crashes right through Taylor (nice catch, doofus) and lands him through about 8 chairs. Totally crazy. So yeah, this match had a lot going for it and was totally fun, more than made up for Taylor's usual lousiness and the weird ending.

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