Lucha Underground Season 4 Episode 3: Rest in Pieces

ER: I don't have much use for Ricky making derpy evil faces with his doll (come on, creepy dolls? We can dig deeper than that, right?) but I thought everybody else's comedy reads were good, much better than I was expecting. Johnny himself had great timing and hit all the beats he was supposed to, with Taya being good with reaction faces (and the dark lipstick is a cool choice). "Has anyone seen Angelico around? I owe him a beating."

TL: My favorite video game series of all time is Xenoblade Chronicles, where the monsters you face are basically just giant versions of animals you’d find in real life. The second game that came out last year has giant spiders and snakes in it (both animals I’m deathly afraid of), and if I get bored driving back on my commute from work and stare at the hills while waiting in traffic, I half expect to see giant animals come over the hillside and make a beeline for the cars. This is also why “Giant Spider Invasion” is my favorite MST3K episode by far. Feel like me visualizing this stuff helps me face my fears.

What I’m trying to say is that Jack Evans’ fear of snakes leading him to make a colonic appointment excuse trying to get out of a match is totally something I understand. Ricky’s replacement-level Al Snow circa 1999 faces can leave, though.

Jack Evans vs. XO Lishus

ER: I had never heard nor seen Lishus before this, but thought he had a great debut. It was a really long showcase (longer than most debuting guys) and Evans is a good stooge for this kind of routine. Lishus clearly has a dance background and I like how he integrated it, taking a splits bump, a really impressive Matrix bridge, his crazy leg split finisher off the top, and big bumps. He and Jack are both athletic bumpers with impressive body control, though Jack is better at making them come off more reckless. I liked Lishus' dive, although for an exotico he needs to work more stiff. Both guys had amusing handsprings, with Lishus hitting a big slap at the end of his and Evans landing a eye rake. This was plenty fun, surprised they had Lishus go over so strong, but this kind of debut is infinitely more interesting than Mr. Pectacular or Jake Strong.

TL: Yeah, for as much crap as we give LU on a regular basis, they’re the only semi-major fed in the US that would book an exotico on the regular, let alone even hear of one, so it’s cool to see XO get a shot here. The athleticism was a blast to watch, and Jack’s bendy selling and nutty bumping really helped put some of the more athletic stuff over even more. The split-based offense is tremendous, and he’s the only guy I’ve seen make an X-Factor look actually hurty, so a lot of props here for XO. Now go give Effy a shot, LU. Also, Jack Evans’ shit-talking is hilarious coming from a guy his size, and I always enjoy how a guy who should be out of wrestling due to his risk-taking and bumping has somehow found a way to elongate his career by being a shit-talking semi-comedic rudo.

ER: Oof that Pentagon/Cage segment was lame. Pentagon cuts a promo that sounds like bullet points for a promo, like they planned on fleshing it out later but forgot so Pentagon was left with his catch phrase and "I'm gonna defend my title, and keep winning". I like Cage but he was tanked by awful Striker/Vampiro reads here. Cage pulls a table out from under the ring, starts setting it up, and Vampiro (sounding like he was dryly added in post) says, "Wait...what is Cage doing?" Striker says "How can Pentagon break someone who is not man, but machine!?" And then moments later Cage on the mic says almost the exact same thing. Yeah, Pentagon got put through a table, but what a half asleep segment.

TL: Bullet points in a promo, you say? Sounds like Penta is ready for the writing of the award-winning World Wrestling Federation. I know Penta is being booked as being nigh unstoppable, but Cage jumping someone from behind doesn’t make a lot of sense considering how he’s been booked. I mean, Penta just ran through Matanza and the rest of the roster in Aztec Warfare. Cage putting him through a table isn’t exactly something that’s gonna make me salivate for a match between the two of them. Another instance of weird LU booking.

Grave Consequences 3 Way to the Grave: Mil Muertes vs: Jeremiah Crane vs. Fenix

ER: Plenty of violence and plenty of bullshit, which really would make this a pretty great fed if they consistently delivered on those things, and also greatly depends on the quality of the latter of those two things. This one went on too long and had a finishing stretch I didn't like, but there was so much violence, a spirited Fenix performance, and a monster Muertes performance, enough that I gotta call it an easy win. The whole thing likely would have been better if they just did any combination of these guys in a one on one Grave Consequences match, but I thought the three did a good job of keeping the action moving. There were some nasty spills in this one, with everyone seeing who could take a meaner fall into their respective casket lids (Crane took an especially rough one on the floor). Muertes' big right hands were easily worth the price of admission, so many of his great overhand rights that really look like they should have broken Fenix's face, and the shot of him ripping at Fenix's mask while punching his bloody face from above was fantastic. Crane and Fenix brought plenty of nice kicks, Crane flew threw chairs (no shock), and we also had plenty of silliness. Ivelisse came back with bright red hair like Eva Marie (the camera showed her running from behind and I actually thought it *was* Eva Marie, which would have been hilarious), so since she's borrowing the look I assume her new name is Eva Lease. Her interference was quick and got Crane out of there, and there was a nicely done finger break spot, and not long after we get Fenix crashing off the top basically through Crane. The end run wasn't very interesting as it turned into a big moves trade off between Fenix and Muertes, and while all the moves looked good it got annoying seeing Fenix take a huge slam that caved in a coffin, and just get back up and start springing off ropes again. Although it must be said, Fenix's rope work in the match was pretty breathtaking. So while overly long, the match definitely delivered overall, and was one of my favorite Muertes performances. An easy win, and the first genuinely good episode of the season.

TL: Even with Sami’s presence in this match, Mil and Fenix kill it in these matches (their match back in Season 1 was one of my favorite LU matches ever; Mil/Matanza might have been even better) so I’m all about it. Just watching Fenix find new ways to fly (the plancha off the roof of the refrigeration room) and Muertes’ nutty violence (love me an elevator door slam like he’s in a damn Looney Tunes ep) makes this worth watching, even if there’s some flubs with vaulting and other awkward three-way spots. Sami is always at his best taking a beating and he bumps huge here on a few things, including a powerbomb on a coffin and a ridiculous bump off a Mil spear on the outside. The Ivellise stuff was at least well done, even if Ivellise’s hammer was obviously a fake with the head actually breaking off and took away from it a bit. I also can’t top Eva Lease.

The remainder of the match is Mil whooping up on Fenix using the bottom turnbuckle and then absolutely pasting him with some AWESOME right hands (as if we need yet another thing to add to the list of things Mil does well). After an awkward staredown on the outside with Mil, I actually loved Melissa as a second getting the crowd into it as they’ve been a bit tired during this match and weren’t popping for a lot. Fenix taking that belly-to-belly into the casket was disgusting, but he’s named Fenix so he’s back doing his ultra-athletic offense and taking another crazy bump with that chokeslam on the casket. It probably did go a little long, but there was a lot more good than bad here, and while it’s not in the top level of Grave Consequences matches, it’s very good stuff.

Because it’s on the mind, Muertes seems like a guy who is continuously underrated at large, even with two of the greatest lucha brawls of all time with LA Park and maybe the best Abyss match ever in TNA, along with his unbelievable LU brawls (and for me, perhaps the best squash match TV worker going right now). I don’t know what to make of his standing in the grand wrestling pantheon, but he’s carved out a hell of a career in a way that really nobody like him ever has. The more I see him, the more I’m realizing how great he’s been for a long, long time; he has constantly reinvented himself either as Judas or Mesias or Muertes in multiple territories in multiple countries and hasn’t really lost a step at all. It’s remarkable when you step back and look at what he’s done, and even though this isn’t perhaps the shining moment of his LU career, a match like this is so much better than so many other wrestlers’ best matches that it’s easy to forget how good he’s been. His stuff does not go unnoticed with me.

TL: Of course, we get some Striker biblical bullshit to sign us off before seeing Matanza chained up like Eren Yeager (and, I’m guessing due to the magic of Lasik, two good eyes for Antonio - must be good medical insurance at The Temple) before busting loose and breaking Dario’s key. I don’t know what the upping of the whimsical stuff does to my enjoyment of the show (more a fan of kitsch than the actual hard magical being stuff), but if Catrina is bringing herself back due to Fenix, can she bring Lorenzo Lamas back, too, at least? Maybe Antonio found his eye and that’s why he’s got two good eyes right now? At least I’m trying to connect the dots here.


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