Uprising: Lucha Libre Workrate Report 10/27/13

Come journey back in time with me to 7/25/09, thanks to a promotion inexplicably willing to use paid programming to show 4+ year old matches at midnight on a local Spanish-speaking network.

1. Strongman Jon Andersen vs. Oliver John

It's kind of shocking how poorly edited this show is, as the bell for the match doesn't even hit until 10 minutes into the show. It is a half hour show. Literally the first 10 minutes of the program were ring entrances. You are paying money to show guys walking to the ring, jawing with fans, slowly wandering around ringside, and standing in the ring for A THIRD OF THE SHOW THAT YOU PAY MONEY TO AIR! They easily could have fit two matches onto this show if they had just started with Andersen and John in the ring. But I guess we needed to see La Migra revolutionize the art of getting heat by throwing tortillas at Mexicans for 8 minutes. Hilariously, when the bell finally rings, THAT'S when we go to our first commercial break. Amazing. That means that halfway through the show there has been zero wrestling, zero promos, zero ads for upcoming shows, nothing whatsoever that could benefit the promotion or viewers at home in any way. I would LOVE to hear any sort of justification from the people that paid for this to represent their company.

And why did we sit through 10+ minutes of ring entrances? Why, so we could get a 2.5 minute match that ends with John getting counted out by walking to the back, of course! Once the bell rang, John tried to avoid locking up with Strongman, rolling to the floor a couple times. Eventually Andersen caught him and clotheslined him to the floor. Then the other two guys in La Migra got on the apron, and got clotheslined off. Then John snuck in with a chair, hit Strongman with it, and bailed to the floor again, followed by all of La Migra walking to the back and getting counted out.

Yep, couple clotheslines, a chairshot. That's why we needed more than 10 minutes of ring entrances. You see, we wouldn't have been able to figure out that we need to boo one of the guys, and cheer the large roided up guy who kept asking for the crowd to cheer. This match set up a tag match later on in the show, so I assume we get that in a coming week, because lord knows we need to take up a few weeks of programming to set up a tag match that took place last decade.

I have no clue what the point of this program is.

2. El Amante & Ulysses (The Latin Explosion) vs. Derek Sanders & Zack Reeb (La Migra)

Ironically this match is joined right when the bell rings and both teams are in the ring. So...they DO know how to edit filler...which means that they just genuinely felt that showing 10 minutes of ring entrances was the best possible use of their paid programming. Wow.

This is a fun match, a solid 8 minutes of wrestling. Ulysses is a smaller guy who is good when sticking to his size, and stumbles when working bigger. Here his armdrags and headscissors look real good, but then he starts working as if he's much bigger and tries a powerslam and backdrop and it becomes clear that Sanders is working with a Real Doll. Amante is the better of the two and is real fluid in his ranas and dropkicks. Sanders and Reeb are a good team, know how to stooge, and know how to give logical comebacks. Match ends with Reeb hitting an accidental clothesline on the ref, then Latin Explosion getting the pinfall when another ref runs in. Naturally the ruling is reversed and La Migra are still the tag champs. Obviously this was such a devastating moment for Latin Explosion that they felt it would still be relevant 4 years later. Also, 3 of the guys in this match are no longer with the promotion. Jon Andersen hasn't working here in over 3 years. Only Oliver John and Derek Sanders remain in the promotion, so they paid money to promote a guy who hasn't worked there in 3 years, and a heartbreaking moment of an underdog tag team (who also hasn't worked there in 3 years) almost winning the tag titles.

This is a promotion that runs practically monthly, and has been doing so for 5 years. What could possibly be gained from showing matches this old?