Cactus Knows There is Crack in Everything, That is How the Light Gets In

Cactus Jack Manson/Rick Ryder vs. Steiner Brothers NWA 1/20/90 - FUN

PAS: It's Steiner brother mauling a pair of jobbers which is always a blast. Cactus is starting to get a bit of a push, so he jumps Rick and gets a couple of shots in before the hammer is dropped. Rick hits a released belly to belly which folds Cactus in half. Ryder comes in a gets thrown around top rope belly to belly gut wrench, sick Frankensteiner, only for Cactus to beat him up post match, and hit the hipbuster. You wouldn't guess Cactus had such a stellar future ahead of him from this, but this role of punching bag who kills his partners post match was a lot of fun.

Cactus Jack/Abdullah The Butcher vs. Bill Kazmaier/Brian Pillman WCW10/12/91 - FUN

PAS: This didn't have the chaos that your best Cactus/Abby tag matches had, but had some nifty moments. I actually loved the big guy face offs between Abby and Kazmaier and I want to track down their singles match on WCWSN, Abby was a force in this, thrusting Pillman in his bad throat, knocking him off the apron with a running shoulder block, and he and Kazmaier freight train into each other. Cactus was a bit subdued, especially for 91. He is mostly on the defensive and would have ended up pinned by Kazmaier's incubatory FU at the end of the match if Abby didn't cut loose with the Kendo stick. Much more of a standard tag then a whirlwind, but plenty to like.

Cactus Jack/Larry Zbyszko vs. Abdullah the Butcher/Ron Simmons WCW 2/2/92 - FUN

PAS: Love this pair of WAR teams locking up on the Main Event. This was set up to tease the Omni Cactus vs. Abby cage match, and they did a nice job whetting the whistle but never really giving us a full taste. I actually dug the Abby vs. Larry Z interactions the most, with Zbyszko breaking out his spin kick to Abby's big guts, only to be met with some nasty karate thrusts and Abby curling his finger and trying to rip out Larry's eye (with a great bellowing sell by Zbyzko). They did a Simmons face in peril section which wasn't much, only to have him hot tag Abby, almost immediately tag back in and spinebuster and pin Cactus. Felt like wires might have been crossed there. We go right into a fun post match brawl which sees Cactus hit a hipbuster on Abby and smash him with a big rolled up piece of cage material. Release the Omni footage!!

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WWF Raw 4/20/98: A Good On Paper Episode of Wrestling TV

Long Island Street Fight: Faarooq vs. Kama Mustafa

ER: This would have played better as a still photo. I'm not sure if it makes sense, but this was a fairly middling match where both guys looked cool for large portions. The Nation comes out through the crowd, everyone is wearing all black, Kama's street fight gear is black jeans and a black sleeveless T, Faarooq is in black jeans with taped up ribs, just a couple of badass looking dudes. But the match never really matches the intensity of the stip or the look. Faarooq STARTS the match by hitting Kama with a hammer, and it's REALLLL tough to keep up the pace when a fight starts with someone taking a hammer to the head. What doesn't help things is that Faarooq sells a beating like a guy having a restless night of sleep. He's got his ribs taped up, and Kama attacks the ribs, drops a nice elbow, hits him with a heavy ass garbage can (WWF was new to weapons at this point and didn't know to use flimsy cans), and Faarooq sells it like a turtle who realizes he won't be able to get off his back so has given up. This needed a lot more intensity that they gave it.

Dan Severn vs. Mosh

ER: This was really cool, as it was basically worked like a Bloodsport match. Severn shot in with a fireman's carry takedown and double legs and kept Mosh down with his weight, but Mosh was no pushover on the mat. I've never thought of Mosh as someone with amateur wrestling tendencies in the ring, so it was cool to watch him not go limp on takedowns on throws. He was taken down with a reverse waistlock and kept fighting to his right and actually almost pulled off a go behind on Severn. It actually looked like Severn wasn't expecting it and they both tumbled into the ropes. Severn throws him with a couple of cool rolling gutwrench suplexes, and Mosh keeps trying to slow the momentum of them, making them only look cooler and fought for. Mosh even got a big arcing takedown while Severn was distracted, and Severn nearly took a huge head drop off it, like he was Misawa taking a big German. I really dug the two grappling on their feet, ending with Severn throwing what looked like a shoot bodyslam, then doing a similar lift into a powerslam before trapping the arm. The only actual strike that was thrown was a kneelift from Severn (and a really terrible punch on the floor, when Thrasher took out Cornette with a punch that landed somewhere around Cornette's elbow). 

Goldust vs. Bradshaw

ER: This was worked the way the opening street fight should have been worked, and this one didn't need weapons. Well, it did have Bradshaw's heavy chaps as a weapon, and Bradshaw charging Goldust with a big boot and beating him with chaps was more violent than anything in the street fight. Bradshaw was at his most Hansen here, and I swear he whipped those chaps straight across Goldust's face. Goldust is a big guy and Bradshaw isn't going to be able to bully him, so instead we get two guys having no problem working stiff with each other. Goldust is a more generous bumper than Bradshaw so Bradshaw is the aggressor, but the punch and chop exchanges all look good, and they are both really GREAT at making missed offense look like it was supposed to hit. Goldust is really fantastic at moving at the very last second, so when Bradshaw misses an elbowdrop it has the feeling of Bradshaw being actually surprised that he hit mat instead. 

Both guys run face first into boots, Bradshaw throws a couple of wicked corner clotheslines, Goldust hits the best lariat of the match (a leaping one after a fast rope run), and this sadly ends when "Club Kamikaze" (forgot that's what Kaientai was called before they actually wrestled) runs in and attacks Bradshaw. Also, Bradshaw hit a fallaway slam on Goldust at one point, and Michael Cole called it a "desperation move". I think we really need to sit down and ask Michael Cole point blank if he can "What is a desperation move?" Because we now have 20+ years of evidence that shows that I most certainly does not know. Goldust went for a crossbody, Bradshaw caught him, held him, then threw that 270 pound man dead overhead. You could not pause a single frame of that sequence and find anything resembling desperation. For whatever reason, Cole has always used the phrase "desperation move/maneuver" to describe the moment that one wrestler stopped the momentum of their opponent, but never to actually accurately point out a desperation move.

Terry Funk/2 Cold Scorpio vs. The Midnight Express

ER: This was a cool match (one that was somehow given 7 minutes) that the crowd could not have cared less about. I don't think there was anything these four could have done to move this crowd. Bob Holly and Bart Gunn were a bad idea for a Midnight Express team, but we won't go into that because it was obviously supposed to fail. But they were a good team, just a team that the crowd couldn't have cared less about. But I was really surprised that a NY crowd didn't care about Scorpio or Funk. The crowd had just gotten their first Austin appearance of the night, a quick but good promo, and it's probable they were still mentally distracted. I felt bad for Funk, because the old man was out there trying. It felt like he was doing a classic album in front of a crowd who didn't recognize the band. His loud chops got reactions, but his buckled knee selling of Gunn's nice left hands played to cruel silence, his nice neckbreaker got no reaction, his comically wild missed punches got nothing, just a startlingly quiet reaction. 

The Midnight Express could have gelled nicely as a team, but that wasn't what they were there to do. Holly was clearly the most shaken by the silence. The guy dropped Funk with a nice piledriver, and again with a spike piledriver, and THAT gets silence? That would bug me, too. Gunn tried to fire people up from the apron and give us some big slams, but you have never heard bumps this loud because the crowd was just that quiet. Gunn and Scorpio each hit over the shoulder powerbomb - which is a really cool move - to nothing, Holly hits a big huracanrana on Scorpio, Midnights set up a nice drop toehold/elbowdrop double team, and nobody cares. It sucks. Scorpio finally wakes them up at the end by hitting a wild plancha into both Midnights, really flying far out past the mats. And the finish is big for this era, with Scorpio catching Holly's knees on a moonsault but still getting to hit the 450 a bit after. Scorpio's 450 was so beautiful and so impactful that I have no clue why he didn't break out as a guy in WWF. Should have been a super popular midcard guy during the Attitude Era. I'm happy we got his great NOAH run, but I've always wondered what if WWF did Scorpio better. 

HHH/New Age Outlaws vs. Owen Hart/LOD 2000

ER: This was a good longer match that the crowd also iced out, so there was just something with the crowd tonight. They win them over in the end, but LOD gets a big reaction during their entrance, DX obviously gets a big reaction, plus you have Chyna, X-Pac, and Sunny at ringside, so this match should have had some real heat. The opening Owen/Gunn sprint was really good, the two had good chemistry. Owen and HHH always had good chemistry too, so a lot of the pairings were crisp. Owen's spin kick to Gunn looked really good, he had a great drop toehold on HHH (and HHH was always strong at taking drop toeholds, underrated part of his game), and Road Dogg was great getting tagged in at the same time as Animal and doing some "Are you kidding me?" faces. His work with Owen was strong too, and he ran hard into LOD offense. LOD looked a little slow, but still hit hard. Hawk might look clumsy during this era, but he's still going to throw a strong lariat. Animal is a little more energetic, and the crowd does get into the finish. LOD gave Road Dogg a wicked doomsday device, Chyna grabbed Sunny and carried her off like King Kong, Animal decked X-Pac, lots of good action. This was a good trios match with over guys, and a lot of men suggesting oral sex throughout. It should have been hotter.

Steve Blackman vs. Dude Love

ER: This was the weakest match of the night, and it made me realize that there aren't any actually good Dude Love matches other than the two Austin PPV matches. Foley worked the character pretty consistently for a year, mid '97 to mid '98, and outside of those two matches I can't think of a single Dude Love gem. The tag title win was more of an angle, and I don't think he has any other singles matches of note. It's odd that a wrestler as good as Foley could go nearly a whole year with so few quality matches. There aren't even any intriguing on paper matches that I haven't seen, just a bunch of 4 minute matches against guys like the Sultan. This was really dry, and Foley looked like an actual untrained wrestler at different points. The dancing never got over, he paced matches slower, and his execution was loose and uncaring. It was like he was a proto Orange Cassidy except the joke never actually got over. Foley threw a swinging neckbreaker that physically went the wrong direction, and it was one of the only spots of the match. Blackman is another guy who would have been a fun add to modern Bloodsport indies. He had a Zero-1 mostly untrained MMA McCully brothers vibe (but more wooden), constantly looking for new offense that would stick, so he would always try out new strikes or surprise you with a diving headbutt. This mainly served as an angle, with the match kind of just killing time until Austin ran out to blast Dude with a lariat, then throw McMahon hard to the ground. Hot quick angle to end the show.


ER: I was unprepared for the crowd to be so quiet during these matches. The card looked real hot on paper with a lot of good pairings, but the Nassau crowd really didn't care about a lot of this. The strength of a lot of the matches was still there on the screen, but they all would have benefited from an engaged crowd. The unique matches made it well worthwhile.

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All Time MOTY List Head to Head 2009: FUTEN Tag VS. Foley vs. Nash

Kevin Nash vs. Mick Foley TNA Hard Justice 8/16/09

ER: This is a great match. A legitimately great match. Kevin Nash was 50 in this match and I'm doubtful that he has another performance as good at any point in his career. Foley barely had 10 matches left in his career at this point and he turns in easily one of his best performances of the decade. I honestly didn't think either of these two had a match anywhere close to this good in them at this point in their careers. This is a straight up fight, with great selling from both, great blood, and no skipped steps. The selling is great from go, as Nash is throwing super forceful knees in the corner to Foley's gut, and Foley is just stumbling and crumpled after. This whole match is like a super serious version of the Roy Munson/Big Ern showdown, and I mean that in the best way possible. Both men were worn, not 100%, tired, but proud. As the match goes on Nash keeps making all of these hard-breathing "what the hell is wrong with this guy...what the hell is wrong with me!?" faces. Foley takes a hard spill onto the apron, then gets kicked into the guardrail and flies backwards into it, banging off it in sick fashion. Foley amps the crazy by doing his leaping elbow off the apron, with Nash under a chair, and Foley gets his head busted open when Nash shifts the chair.

Foley gets a classic Mick gusher going, and Nash is savage working it over, and still wrecking the rest of Foley's body by ramming the back of his head into the ringpost, the steps, and keeping those knees and elbows coming. Nash's knees and elbows move slow here, but the hit with great impact. His hair keeps getting more fly aways, his eyes keep saying "why isn't this OVER" but there's Foley, getting up after each rough fall, firing back with headbutts and hard fists, and you know Nash gets busted open too. We even get the visual of blood flying onto the camera like I'm watching Hacksaw Ridge. Nash works over Foley's cut with elbows and jabs, and Nash's own cut is dripping pretty good. We don't get a great finish, with Traci Brooks running out and getting on the apron for reasons I don't care about and will never bother to look up, but I liked how the two wrestlers handled the final moments: Foley distracted by Brooks, Nash gives him and eyepoke and boot to the face before Foley can use his barbed wire bat, and Nash pins him by defiantly/desperately pulling that leg WAY back while sitting on his chest. This was an awesome old guy war, the kind of war that's tough for younger wrestlers to have because the added mileage of both men adds in every way to the brutality. This was legitimately great.

PAS: Cactus Jack was at one point my favorite wrestler in the world, one of the first comp tapes I made was a Best of Cactus Jack. I assumed he was completely washed by 2009 but this was a classic Foley performance, basically it was the WCWSN Vader match, with fucking Kevin Nash of all people playing the role of Vader, and doing a pretty solid job of it. The couple of insane bumps Foley takes are legit insane Foley bumps, when Nash kicks him into the guardrail you can see his head snap into the metal and hear the dull thud. The hipbuster elbow into the chair was lunacy, you could see the metal bend, and that eye wound that opened up was truly grizzly. Don't have a ton of nice things to say about TNA over its run, but they would always bring the plasma. Nash landed his stuff with real force, and I enjoyed how frantic he got as Foley kept coming, really good subtle in ring acting. Finish was kind of goofy and unnecessary but otherwise this was a treat. Eddie Marlin vs. Tommy Gilbert with insane bumps, can't ask for more then that

FUTEN Tag Review

Verdict:

PAS: I figured this would be a swamping. FUTEN tags are maybe my favorite thing in wrestling history, but Nash vs. Foley was really awesome. If it had a better ending I could actually see this being a discussion, but that run-in was pretty deflating and the FUTEN retains.

ER: This started when I watched the match a couple months ago on a lark. I'd seen it brought up in various places as a good brawl, and one late night I was in the mood for a short old guy wrestling brawl before bedtime. I never actually considered that the match would be worth writing up, let alone worth writing up as a challenger for our All Time MOTY list. But I was pretty blown away by the performances here, and can honestly say it's one of my 5 favorite matches in TNA history. The ending was stupid, and I would have been furious had I wrecked my body in a physical match only to have it end with an angle that nobody was going to remember. I think this match would have finished really really high if we had a 2009 MOTY List. It's not beating the FUTEN tag, but at several points during the match I loved that my brain was actually thinking "IS THIS MATCH GOING TO BEAT THE FUTEN TAG!?" That's a pretty wild accomplishment on its own, and I would heartily recommend everyone watch this match right now.

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At Night Time the King Goes Out to Look at People

Jerry Lawler v. Slyck Wagner Brown NEW 10/3/04 - SKIPPABLE

ER: Woof. When was the last time you went out of your way to watch a Slyck Wagner Brown singles match? Because I just did. And if feels like I went out of my way to watch a Slyck Wagner Brown singles match. This match just goes on forever. Brown is not good at doing things related to pro wrestling, but I suppose we needed 20 minutes or so to let him tell his story. His story was not very good. You can't get back 20 Slyck Wagner Brown minutes. They're gone forever. Brown has no offense outside of kicks, punches and a moonsault, but even those things seem like maybe too much for him to handle as he's not good at moving from one to the other and seems to get frequently lost during the match. Here he's always repositioning Lawler in unintentionally funny ways. He'll be punching Lawler in the corner, then stop, then kinda grab Lawler by the shoulders and move him over to the ropes, as if to say "Okay, now if you could just stand riiiiight there...." Other times Lawler has to put himself into position for moves that Brown is already supposed to be doing. At one point it was clear that Lawler was supposed to get choked over the middle rope, but Brown was just kind of standing around as if Lawler was supposed to be the one to drape himself over the ropes! Sadly, Lawler does exactly that. Also, we have Mick Foley as the muggy guest ref, who at one point stops the match to go on a detective hunt when he suspects Brown's second may have interfered. I can't shit talk Lawler's performance in this as he tries to make do with all the garbage, but he is just one man. His dropkick was incredible in this, one of the highest I've seen him hit, but Brown and everybody else just drug this dooooooown.

PAS: I remember a period when Slyk Wagner Brown was in the same general discussion as guys like Low-Ki and Christopher Daniel and Homicide. He always stunk, but he would get booked as a worker on USA-Pro and NWA-NJ shows. He was kind of big and the kind of fake athletic, ie could do a moonsault and had a high leapfrog. Some of the Northeast indy guys who disappeared, I would love to have show up and face Lawler, how good would Lawler v. Xavier be? Lawler could have a good match against Cheetah Master, a fun brawl with Magic, he could be a nice base for Ric Blade. It is too bad we have to sit through Slyk (by we I mean Eric, I didn't watch this).

COMPLETE AND ACCURATE LAWLER

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Phil's Ongoing 2007 MOTY LIST

1. Nigel McGuinness v. Samoa Joe ROH 3/3
2. John Cena v. Umaga WWE 1/28
3. Nigel McGuinness v. Takeshi Morishima ROH 4/14
4. Chris Harris v. James Storm TNA 5/13
5. Jimmy Jacobs v. B.J. Whitmer ROH 3/4
6. Samoa Joe v. Takeshi Morishima ROH 2/16
7. Matt Hardy v. Finlay WWE 6/19
8. Shawn Micheals v. John Cena WWE 4/23
9. Jimmy Jacobs v. B.J. Whitmer ROH 3/31
10. Solar 1/Mano Negra v. Negro Navarro/Black Terry Lucha Libre VIP 3/10
11. MNM v. Hardy Boyz WWE 1/28
12. Briscoes v. Ricky Marvin/Kontaro Suzuki NOAH 1/21
13. Bryan Danielson/Takeshi Morishima v. KENTA/Nigel McGuiness ROH 5/12
14. John Cena v. Great Khali 5/20
15. Mitsuhara Misawa v. Bison Smith NOAH 6/3
16. John Cena v. King Booker v. Bobby Lashley v. Mick Foley v. Randy Orton WWE 6/24
17. Briscoes v. Murder City Machine Guns ROH 4/28
18. Finlay v. Undertaker 3/6 WWE
19. Briscoes v. Kevin Steen/El Generico ROH 4/14
20. Colt Cabana v. Jimmy Jacobs ROH 2/24
21. Takeshi Sasaki v. Yuki Miyamoto BJW 3/14
22. John Cena v. Shawn Michaels WWE 4/1
23. Shinjiro Ohtani/Takao Omori/Kazunari Murakami v. Kohei Sato/Hirotaka Yokoi/Yoshiro Takayama Zero 1 1/19
24. Matt Sydal v. The Man Gravity Forgo PAC ROH 3/4
25. Davey Richards/Roderick Strong v. Jack Evans/Delirious ROH 4/14

Previously on the list

Necro Butcher v. Toby Klien CZW 1/13
Chris Benoit v. Chavo Guerrero WWE 1/16
BJ Whitmer v. Jimmy Jacobs ROH 1/27
Nigel McGuiness v. Jimmy Rave ROH 3/4
Matt Hardy v. Ken Kennedy WWE 3/13
Samoa Joe v. Eddie Kingston FSM 3/17
Takeshi Morishima/Mohammed Yone v. Jun Akiyama/Takeshi Rikio NOAH 4/1
Undertaker v. Batista WWE 4/1
Chris Benoit v. MVP 4/10
Yuji Nagata v. Hiroshi Tanahashi NJ 4/13
Mitsuhara Misawa v. Takuma Sano NOAH 4/28
John Cena v. Great Khali v. Umaga WWE 6/4

7. Matt Hardy v. Finlay WWE 6/19

Matt Hardy has really developed a great TV match formula in the first half of the year. A batch of hot offense, he injures a body part, the heel works over the body part, Hardy does a great job of selling, and then he pulls out a flash win. It is pretty much a formula you can use with anyone half decent and have a good match. Hardy plays the role great, he is probably the best seller in the WWE outside of maybe Cena, and his offense is simple and looks good. When you plug a master like Finlay into the formula you are really going to have a treat. Finlay is spectacular here, going after the leg, everything he does is with force and violence and I am loving the indian death lock as a secondary finisher, maybe it is a shout out to Princess Paula.

13. Bryan Danielson/Takeshi Morishima v. KENTA/Nigel McGuiness ROH 5/12
This was a blow away main event of an otherwise crappy PPV. I have read people complain about Nigel just throwing lariats, but I am a Choshu fan, nothing wrong with simplifying what you do, if you do it well, and Nigel was killing people with lariats here, from all angles. Nigel's big match restarts are always fun, and I loved him coming back in with the taped up arm, and the jawbreaker with the bad arm was a great near fall. You kind of forget how good Danielson is, but he was amazing here. KENTA and McGuiness are two of his best opponents, and all of their interactions were great. The multiple reversal finish is a staple of indy wrestling, but Danielson may be the only guy who can really pull it off. The whole finish section with KENTA was completely awesome. The match wasn't perfect, for guys who trained together and work constantly KENTA and Morishima don't interact well, and the points where they were matched up were the weakest parts.


15. Mitsuhara Misawa v. Bison Smith NOAH 6/3

I was down right shocked at how much I enjoyed this match. I really loved Misawa in his matches against Sano and Sugiara. He plays the role of a broken down old Samurai trying to will his body into one more battle, he wants to pass the torch but no one will take it. It is a cool role, and he is incredible in it. Still its Bison Smith, outside of a 2001 match I saw live against Donovan Morgan, and some fun UPW tags with Luminous Warrior against Orlando and Marquis Jordan, he kind of always sucked. No real reason to think that broken down Misawa could drag him to anything. Boy was I wrong Not only was this good, it wasn't a great wrestler dragging a shitty guy to a good match (like Jacobs v. Whitmer or Cena v. Micheals), Smith was right there wrestling the match of his life. Misawa is overpowered early but uses his guile to injure Smith's leg. Smith does a pretty good job of selling this (I saw him fake a knee injury as part of an APW political play during the King of the Indies tourney, so I knew he could sell), but still is able to throw around Misawa. He press slams him from the ring to the apron, which was a totally crazy bump, and also hits some really great shoulder blocks, including a tope from the ring floor over the rail onto a seated Misawa, easily the best I have ever seen Smith look. Still this was all about Misawa's selling. They tease two countouts, one after the press slam to the ramp, and one after the tope into the stairs, and both times Misawa just lies there untill the count gets to 15 or so, then he takes this deep breath, and rejoins the battle. He wants nothing more then to lay down his sword, but something keeps him going. I also loved the finish, Misawa is able to catch Smith and reverse him into a second rope Emerald Frosion (which was the only sequence in this match which didn't look good), and then he pounces, he has been conserving his energy for this moment, and he just pounds on a weakened Smith, until he finishes him with a nasty elbow to the back of his head. Misawa is still totally awesome, but I don't think that it will translate well to his ROH stuff. Although if Misawa can have a match this good with Bison Smith, Misawa v. Joe should be insane.


16. John Cena v. King Booker v. Bobby Lashley v. Mick Foley v. Randy Orton WWE 6/24

You X division cluster isn't really my style, but when you replace interchangeable Sonjay Duttish guys with big hard hitting over heavyweights it can be pretty damn fun. Cena is the wrestler of the year, but he works well in long matches where he can sell and build to big spots, this isn't that kind of match so he really was incidental. Lashley was a monster here, chucking people around, taking big bumps and delivering an absolutely spectacular tope. Foley takes a couple of nice bumps and is over enough to not do a ton, I did love him throwing socko to the crowd and grabbing a chair to waste people. Booker and Orton were the only heels here, and were just awesome, Booker was just recking people with knees, and was the guy in this match doing the lions share of the work. Orton may the best wrestler in the world at timing big spots, and his countering of the five knuckle shuffle into an RKO was perfect. Finishing run was great, as all four guys stuff is so over, that all the near falls were big.

17. Briscoes v. Murder City Machine Guns ROH 4/28

Briscoes are guys with a pretty set formula, the formula is what it is, and you will tend to get what you get from it. The PPV tag against Sydal/Claudio was a pretty basic example of the formula. Some time killish stuff at the beginning, leading into some big crazy spots at the end, about half the time the match ends on time, half the time it goes a bit too long. If the formula is hitting on cylinders it can be pretty entertaining, but it rarely moves into excellent. What separated this match from you standard Briscoes match, was a load of quality bullshit by the Murder City Machine Guns. The first part of the match which is often the Briscoes weak point, was filled with a Shelly and Sabin homage to every cheap heat heel stooge in the book. All of that stuff got me into the match, so when they start with their big finish (and it was a great finish run) it wasn't just a collection of cool looking stuff, but I actually cared.

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