Found Footage Friday: QUEBECERS EXPLODE~! CESARO~! GUNTHER~! LOS COWBOYS IN GUATEMALA~!

Los Cowboys (El Texano/Silver King) vs. Astro de Oro/Skeletor Guatemala 9/15/91

MD: There's a certain genre of match that I find fascinating. There's no good name for it but it's best described by the rudos/heels being visibly, noticeably concerned about the amount of heat they might get in front of a specific crowd and adapting their wrestling accordingly. I don't know what preceded this but there was nothing to make Texano and Silver King come off as particularly rudo in the early going here. They came out, they were nice to fans, they posed well with the belts and the anthems. They wrestled clean early. Texano worked really hard to get a handshake. And the trash was still coming and they seemed kind of alarmed and put off by it. For the anthem, there were a ton of kids singing which was always a good sign. Skeletor came out with a robe with Guatemala on the back. Astro de Oro was obviously beloved. 

So there wasn't any mask ripping here. Their win in the segunda was real quick. While they controlled in the tercera there was never really that sense of danger for the tecnicos. You always got the sense that even amidst the double teams Skeletor could PROBABLY make the tag if he really really wanted to. It was, shall we say, a ginger rudo performance. 

Instead, they flew all over the place. They missed leaps off the top rope and dives. There was plenty of heel miscommunication. Silver King was happy to fly out of the ring on a kick out. Skeletor was charismatic and hammed it up a bit with Texano. Silver King and Astro de Oro were really moving at times and mostly everything looked very good. There was a point in the tercera where Texano and Silver King did Tiger Feints instead of diving and one guy right in the center of the crowd shot let out a popper/firework thinking the dive was coming and that's a little bit of really interesting cultural information. It made me sad for him that they didn't get dives because his timing was perfect. Anyway, of course the locals won and everyone survived to see tomorrow. 

Jacques Rougeau vs. Pierre Carl Ouellet WWF 10/21/94

MD: This is about 80% of a perfect match to me. 75%, 75%. I was thinking structurally, but the thing needed blood too. It has parallels to MS-1 vs. Sangre Chicana in some ways. And before you balk at that, think of the setting. This is Jacques in Montreal, in what was supposed to be a celebratory swansong. He's up against Pierre. He's got Raymond in his corner. Polo's out there with PCO.  

And Pierre cheapshots him before he can get his robe off. Raymond tries to break it up but the ref pulls him off which just lets Pierre stomp away. Jacques tries to fire back, but Pierre's younger, stronger, bigger. He lays in a beating, a nasty, brutal thing. Every time it seems like Jacques has an answer, he cuts him off. Jacques is able to outsmart him and back body drop him over the top. He lands on his feet. Jacques gets a flurry and he catches him in midair and puts him in the tree of woe. When the ref tries to stop things, Polo comes over to choke him. Pure heat. There's one moment where Pierre is whipping Jacques off the ropes and Jacques makes a sort of out of control bobbling motion, almost seizing, with his head as he's getting whipped and it's some of the best selling I've ever seen.

The thing is, Pierre can't put him away. So he starts to go with more and more high risk moves. He hits a flip dive. He goes off the turnbuckles, once, twice, and then Jacques catches him, crotching him on top. It's not quite the punch heard round the world but it's pretty damn satisfying, especially to this crowd. 

And it opens the floodgates for the ritual beating. And what a beating it is. When Jacques tosses him into the stairs on the outside, it's about as loud as I've heard stairs. After beating him around the ring, Jacques goes for a mounted punch (no puns). Pierre tosses him off and we get this great ref bump. Polo comes in to attack. Raymond hits him with a superkick.

And that's when they should have taken this thing home. Have it seem like Pierre was going to get the advantage, have Jacques mount one last comeback, go to the finish. They don't though. They just sort of meander with some nearfalls and momentum shifts and they don't lose the crowd, but once you see Polo back on his feet rooting for Pierre, you realize that the match went just a little long in the tooth. The finish is amazing, Pierre going for a tombstone and Jacques turning it around for this gnarly sitout variation and then slowly, fatefully draping a hand over for three. There's just no reason why that couldn't have happened almost immediately after Polo got taken out. And blood. Blood would have been good. Still, 75% perfect is pretty damn good.

Cesaro vs. Gunther WWE 11/8/21

MD: This is a house show match between Cesaro and Gunther. In Leeds. It is definitely. That's nothing to scoff at. It's just not transcendent like Cena vs Reigns or even the parts of Jacques vs Pierre that were transcendent. 

It had room to breathe. It managed the crowd well (and a crowd like that needed managing). It didn't get ahead of its sails. It didn't go off any rails. It was measured and focused and did what it had to. Instead of having the crowd go for dueling chants or ironically entertaining themselves (or shouting 2! a lot or whatever), it got them to clap up three times, early on in a test of strength, then during a surfboard (the one with the head in; Cesaro got out of it with some headbutts of his own after he turned it) and finally once in the heat as he was building to the comeback. 

It got them to chant for the swing right before Cesaro got it down the stretch. They hit hard, both early on and right before the finish. And yes, they built to that swing and they paid it off. They worked things fairly even up front. Gunther would go for cheapshots and deviate from the wrestling first but Cesaro generally had an answer. I liked the big comeback spot as Cesaro was able to catch Gunther in midair and turn him, strength outdoing strength, and the finish was good, with a near-miss with the ref before a cheapshot and a thudding top rope splash. This hit marks, and that's admirable. A good match. A good house show match. And good for the crowd for letting it guide them.

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Pirata Morgan, Killing So His Power Grows

Pirata Morgan, Satanico, & MS-1 vs. La Fiera, El Faraon, & El Egipcio EMLL 3/29/1985 - EPIC

Damn, that was violent. I've had the chance to see Pirata in a bunch of different settings thanks to this project, but at the end of the day, he's still a guy at his best working out-of-control lucha brawls, and this here was an out-of-control lucha brawl. He starts right out by punching El Egipcio in the face when he tries to get in the ring. Egipcio returns the favor, and their brawling is sort of the big hook throughout this match (unsurprising, as they were building to a hair match between the two). I've seen a handful of Egipcio matches now, but this is the first time he's actually stood out to me. And yeah, that's probably because he was booked so prominently in the match, but when you're throwing hands with Pirata and look like you're actually in his league, I'm inclined to think you're doing something right. They pave a nice little path of destruction through the post-apocalyptic wasteland that is any good Infernales brawl, including some great brawling around the ring where Pirata wins the award for most violent apron bumping now and forever, actually breaking the wooden barricades surrounding the ring. Satanico and the recently deceased MS-1 lend some very able support. Satanico in particular almost stole the match from Pirata and Egipcio. Phil said he looked like the abusive husband in a Lifetime made-for-TV movie, and I'm hard-pressed to disagree. Fiera and Faraon maybe perform below expectations insofar as they don't stand out the way they usually do, but you'll be too busy in awe of the Infernales' brutality to notice. Although you will notice at the end of the match when Fiera uncorks a "Hector Garza under-rotating on a shooting star press to the floor"-level horrifying botched dive. He comes off of the top rope with essentially a completely vertical upside-down bodypress to Satanico, except he lands just short of the target and Martinetes himself on the floor. Ouch. Surprisingly, for a brawl this intense, there actually wasn't any blood, but I don't suspect you'll find too many bloodless brawls better than this one.

Pirata Morgan, Antifaz del Norte, & Charly Manson vs. Sangre Chicana, Alebrije, & Vampiro Canadiense Monterrey 5/21/2006 - GREAT

This is a big step up from the last Monterrey match I reviewed for this. There are still some annoying heel ref shenanigans, but he eats a Sangre Chicana armdrag really nicely, so I can't really complain too much. Also, there's no Hator in sight, and everyone looks really game here, even a load like Vampiro. This is a garbage brawl, and like most lucha garbage brawls, it feels less violent than it does when they leave the foreign objects alone, especially after the match above. But it's still on the higher end of your lucha garbage brawls, with Alebrije in particular looking like a star here. He eats and bumps for everything really well, including getting his head taken off with a nasty clothesline from Pirata, and taking some nutty bumps on the wooden ramp to the ring. And there's plenty of fun abuse of Cujie as well, with Pirata putting the little guy in a Romero special, before he's used as a projectile by Alebrije to get his revenge later. I thought Antifaz looked really good here as well. His foreign object shots all had some nice pop to them. This wasn't a standout Chicana performance, but I don't think I've ever seen a match where he looked bad, and this is no exception. If nothing else, he clotheslined a wooden board into Antifaz's face. That was pretty cool. I'm a little iffy on the finish, but I admire the gusto with which Pirata faked his getting fouled, especially after the ref didn't believe him right away and he started to sell more frantically.

Pirata Morgan, Emilio Charles Jr., & Astro de Oro vs. Rayo de Jalisco Jr., Mascara Ano 2000, & Cien Caras EMLL 1989 - FUN

This was a one-fall tournament match, but it's a four-team tourney, so they still get 10+ minutes and I can review it, just with lowered expectations. It's also apparently a parejas increibles tournament, as Rayo is not getting along with the Dinamitas, and Astro de Oro is not getting along with Pirata and Emilio. I am not familiar with this Astro de Oro character, so I checked out luchawiki to see what his deal was.

"Greatest Guatemala superstar. Tecnico, who teamed with Rayo Lazer, Skeletor, Starman (Guatemala), Silverman, Arriero de San Juan. Astro de Oro received 50 Quetzales in his first match.

His best match was versus Mascara Ano 2000 in June of 1989, and his worst was against Dr. Wagner Jr.. Astro de Oro's favorite wrestler is Ric Flair.

In his other life, Astro de Oro is an educator. Astro de Oro also claims to be a very successful amateur wrestler before entering lucha libre.

Greatest Guatemala superstar"

Well that clears that up. I don't know when exactly in 1989 this match was in relation to his career best match against Mascara Ano 2000, but I don't remember any especially great exchanges between the two. Overall, the greatest Guatemala superstar didn't make me forget Super Astro or Brazo de Oro, but he was harmless. Pirata and Rayo were the best guys on their respective teams, and their work against each other was plenty fun and fired up. Emilio looked good, but you'll see much better from him, and the Dinamitas were solid but unspectacular. Still, Rayo doing his comedic evasive twirl face-first into Pirata's fist with nobody else fucking anything up will at least earn this FUN status. In conclusion, greatest Guatemala superstar.

COMPLETE AND ACCURATE PIRATA MORGAN

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