WWE Extreme Rules 2018 "Safely Behind Live" Blog

ER: So we gotta get this thing over and done with before Sharp Objects comes on, as Rachel can really only be expected to put up with so much. These were not demands verbally stated by her, these were just things mentally understood and recognized by me.

Sin Cara vs. Andrade Cien Almas

ER: Nice to see Almas running it back on the opening opening dark match of the PPV while the "WWE Universe is still filing in", according to Graves. Was the result of the Smackdown match earlier this week at all in question? There's a problem that Almas takes offense very well, which leads to him giving more offense to guys like Caras, who he really should be running through. The Smackdown match was super fun, but it was also supposed to be a showcase for Almas (to get him ready for pre-show matches I suppose?), so it can Almas doing every big piece of his offense to impress the crowd, but also working a competitive match, so it came off like him having to pull out all the stops to beat Sin Cara. They do a little bit of playing off their Smackdown match, which I was hoping for (even though the crack 7 man announce team doesn't seem to know they wrestled each other on Smackdown), like Almas throwing Cara into the barricade on a dive (nasty spot to happen so early in a match) and Caras slip out the back on the double stomp to the apron. Almas took all the lucha stuff really nicely, took arm drags smooth, bumped generously to the floor, saved that headscissors spot, etc. Cara ate his more impactful offense nicely, so everything they did looked really good, and they bounce off each other nicely, but at the same time the match didn't have a lot of teeth. I did like Almas depriving the fans of a dive spot and instead doing my favorite couple pose in wrestling, with Vega. But this felt like something that was crafted to be a showcase for each guy, separately.

Tables Match: New Day vs. Sanity

ER: Interesting that there's a tables match on the pre-show, as I don't remember many "extreme" matches on the main card when I looked at it earlier this week. We did get a really good Cara/Corbin chairs match on a pre-show before. Perhaps this upcoming PPV is going to be more about the extreme enforcement of rules? That kinda sounds more appealing to me. And this whole match doesn't really work. Everybody in it kind of works equal, which isn't very interesting when you have guys like E and Dain in there. A tornado style match should in theory lead to more chaos and a nasty brawling atmosphere, but instead they opt to do doopy double and triple team spots that require a lot of waiting around and unsatisfying payoffs. That powerbomb/double stomp was very much not worth it. I also prefer past tables matches that I've seen, where the tables were just already set up on the floor, as we get a bit much unnecessary table set up. We just don't get a lot of meat in this match, and it would have been far more interesting seeing them all fight in a normal trios than what we ended up getting. There were a couple nice "going through a table" teases, but this whole thing kind of neutered everyone. Underwhelming.

Matt Hardy/Bray Wyatt vs. Bo Dallas/Curtis Axel

ER: This match feels more pre-show than the two pre-show matches, but I can't deny that I'm digging it more than the two pre-show matches. The B Team are working like a perfectly fine Rougeaus, with stalling bullshit, sneaky shots (loved Dallas kicking Hardy in the head on the apron) and crowd baiting stuff when the cameras might not even be on them (caught Dallas blowing a snot rocket from the apron on the edge of my screen). Wyatt works my favorite performance of his in who knows when with nasty things that like cut-off headbutt on Axel, or stomping fingers when Axel is getting to his feet, but also some nice little selling moments. When Axel was stomping his gut in the corner, Bray did this really nice sell getting back to his feet, pulling up on the top rope the way a guy with a sore as hell core would, even holding his belly while he stepped to the apron after tagging Hardy in. Axel has nice stomps, but I loved Wyatt's dedication at bringing attention to them. I do think the ending was a bit sudden, which made this feel kind of like the first half of a really good match, but I really enjoyed what we got.

Finn Balor vs. Baron Corbin

ER: I do not care much at all about this much, but I definitely think Corbin's look is a step up. I still can't believe we ever get hair matches when balding dudes opt to shave their head. I'll be there within a few years I'm sure, and I'm definitely going to challenge someone before it happens. You just know  Killian Dain is going to show up on some random Smackdown with a shaved head and it'll be a huge waste. Viktor, too. Imagine the month of promos building up an inevitable "must be forced to finally shave head" match between Corbin and Viktor? I don't think Balor has enough strumph behind his offense to look very good against Corbin, and I don't think Corbin is good enough to make a match with Balor compelling. Corbin is at least wrestling aggressively, throwing decent corner lariats, and running after Balor; and I like how Balor is getting caught and punished every time he goes up top, but the finish doesn't do any favors for anybody. I was just getting into the story of Corbin cutting off all attempts at Balor getting ahead, and we get just a small package finish. I have nothing invested in these two, but I don't see how it helps either.

Also, Rachel came into the room during the end of the match and asked "Wait, when did Corbin lose a hair match?" See?? She gets this whole stupid wrestling thing.

Asuka vs. Carmella

ER: The concept of a wimpy manager locked in a shark cage over the ring is a wrestling concept completely foreign to Rachel. When was the first instance of this stip? Anyway, the match is fun and I like that Ellsworth is like me in any stealth video game, having the ability to get active at the very worst time. Drop a chain in front of the ref and escape the cage while Carmella is indisposed? That's exactly me rushing out into the middle of four converging guards in a Metal Gear game. I don't know why Ellsworth's legs are done up like a Steven Tyler microphone stand, but I love how it lead to him being hooked and upside down on the bottom side of the cage. Great visual spot they set up. I was VERY surprised by the finish, and again felt like we got robbed of a second half of match, like we just got the first half and then skipped to the finish. I've gotten that same damn feeling in all three main card matches. Carmella took a nice bump into the railing, our trusty Extreme Rules ring crew is fun getting kicked around by Asuka, love how quickly he bumped to the floor for her. I've really been enjoying Carmella as a character, so I like that she keeps finding ways to get the upset against Asuka, but it feels - again - like we got robbed of half a match.

Jeff Hardy vs. Shinsuke Nakamura

ER: I am ENTIRELY OKAY with how this played out, mainly because these are two guys I was not excited about seeing in a singles match on a Sunday night. Low blow and a really nice Kinshasa? Yes, please. Randy Orton returns (I hadn't actually noticed that he'd been away) and makes me happy that I typically watch these "behind", as I'm able to magically skip ahead to the next match. I did look like Orton came back as a heel, by attacking Hardy, but I bet it's going to turn out that he's just a lame lone wolf. If I'm going to watch Orton, it should be as a heel, because, well, watch Orton for 5 seconds.

Cage Match: Braun Strowman vs. Kevin Owens

ER: This starts nice and hot, with both guys taking big bumps into the cage. I liked Braun running face first into the cage on a missed avalanche, and all the early-seeming finishes tonight in every single other match made me totally buy into Owens winning with the frog splash in 2 minutes. Owens is really good at those rolling cage bumps, getting repeatedly tossed into the cage and rolling down the side to the apron. Graves puts it over by saying it's like having a cheese grater run over your body, which works. Braun is missing all the stuff that's supposed to miss with nice violence; both of his missed avalanches looked rib breaking. I liked the stuff around the handcuffs, liked the caught chokeslam, liked the inevitable cuffs breaking spot, and was blown away by how damn quickly Braun ran up the top of the cage. It did highlight the only glaringly stupid thing of the match, which is Owens' two instances of ultra slow movement. His slow crawling to the cage door earlier was eye rolling, and his slow cage climb was lame. But Braun running up to the damn top of the cage in near record time (especially if we divide it into weight classes for comparison sake) and throwing Owens off the top were a couple of nice match ending moments. Owens took a hell of a dive there. I AM going to sound like a broken record here, but this also seemed to end way early. Normally I'm not one to be begging for matches to be longer, but this isn't all even a match length problem. Instead, everyone just seems to be working the wrong match for their allotted time. They've all started at least promising, they've just all had record skip stops to the finish. I wonder how long it's been since we've had a big table bump off the top of a cage?

Team Hell No vs. The Bludgeon Brothers

ER: I like this match-up on paper, mainly because Bryan feels like a really fun opponent for both of these lovable cosplay doofs. They've lost so much steam with these bad outfits and silly name, but they're both really good at working scrappy small guys. Bryan knows how to dial it up, and all his kicks on Harper look good, while all of Rowan's offense on him look good. Kane comes out somewhat hilariously in a walking boot, and if there's one thing I was hoping for in a Kane match, it's a match where Kane was working much slower than usual. Harper takes out Kane's good leg with a nice looking kick, and AGAIN I think I'm very not that crazy, as this cuts right past a Bryan FIP section leading to any kind of Kane comeback, and goes right to the finish. Who the hell is agent for this show?? I'm hoping someone is laying out all the first halves, and someone else was supposed to handle all the back end work and just completely procrastinating on it and just cutting straight to the pinfall. Kane goes down, Bryan hits Yes kicks, Rowan hits a spin kick and then we get the pinfall. Is my Network feed just skipping ahead because I'm behind, and I'm not noticing? This is bad.

Roman Reigns vs. Bobby Lashley

ER: Lashley throws a decent suplex early, but I like how they're playing this match with Roman getting a long control segment. Crowd is trying their best to not get into the match and come up with chants, but Roman isn't getting rattled and is instead doing all these great puppy dog eyes looks at the crowd as he continues beating Lashley's ass around the ring. Roman is taking his time and the pacing works for the tone. He breaks the slow pacing just once, to run into a nicely timed and quick Drive-By, and the pacing makes Lashley's comeback look more explosive. Roman does his corner clotheslines with a great smug face, and flies into Lashley's bigger pieces of offense (the huge high rotation powerslam and the big man crossbody). Lashley does have fun offense though, a good powerslam will take you far, and there's something I still like about a big man doing an axehandle. And then Bobby shows was an absolute nut he is by taking a HUGE bump over the top to the floor, getting backdropped past the reach of the ropes and therefore not going over slow. He looked like he reached for them on the replay, but that was a Hamrick level bump right there, done by someone weighing 260. The bump felt and looked even more violent than the Owens bump off the cage, and it felt more shocking because I don't think anyone was expecting it to be that rough. The way these finishes have been coming so unexpectedly, I fully bought into the Superman punch finish, but glad it wasn't the finish. Roman doing a full victory lap to run over Lashley was a nice touch, and getting belly to bellied over an announcer's table was nice punishment, and the finish with Lashley cutting off a Reigns spear with his own short spear, was nice, and I like how Lashley played the finish. It's cool to see guys excited that they won a tough match. This match made Lashley look like an actual guy to watch, which has not happened for him so far this run. This is easily the best match of the night so far.

Extreme Rules: Nia Jax vs. Alexa Bliss

ER: I've really been loving the matches between this whole group, and this one is another that is fun right out of the gate. Alexa goes for weapons right away, gets one kendo stick shot in, leading to Jax catching the next one. And then we get a real amusing Looney Tunes spot with Mickie (arguably greatest 2nd in the WWE the past year, she's been so damn great) grabbing weapons frantically for Bliss, with Nia catching all of them when Bliss tries using them, and throwing them into the ring. It was an awesome way to load the ring up with weapons, actually incorporating the weapons thrown into the ring into actual spots. It lead to actual character moments happening instead of everything coming to a complete stop while someone looks for and then throws a half dozen things into the ring. And the eventual beatdown on Nia is a good one, with Alexa eventually getting to use all those weapons, and Nia herself running into some hard shots (ramming herself into the chair in the corner was especially nasty). Mickie is spectacular on the floor with her swooped over hair and Frankenhooker skirt, and she always takes such a great beating from Rousey. That's kind of a lousy thing to be good at, but I think James has helped keep Rousey's status high so far more than maybe anyone. When James finally gets even more involved, you know it leads to Ronda jumping the rail and dishing out a beating. Mickie flies into the barricade a few times, pelvis first into the apron, and then takes a hard as hell looking Death Valley Driver variation in the ring. I like the ways they attacked Nia, with Alexa hitting her in the kneecaps and thighs with a chair, and the finish looked believable enough. I did want a few more minutes of match, but the match didn't feel as abbreviated as most of the rest of this card. You just give me Rousey/Bliss and Nia/Mickie and I'll be a happy camper.

Rusev vs. AJ Styles

ER: We get a couple big bumps early from each guy here, and I'm happy to see Rusev finally get back towards the top of the card. Styles is good at punching up his offense whenever he's against a bigger guy, and I like that we have two guys with good looking submissions. The Calf Crusher is my favorite sub in WWE, but Rusev makes the clutch look really strong. Offense looks good from both guys, the Styles sliding punched looked knockout worthy, and Rusev's belly to belly on the floor landed with a gross thud. Love the false finishes we get with Rusev kicking Styles in the side of the neck with his always good roundhouse, and Rusev selling that damn Calf Crusher with his leg buckling during the clutch. Love a big man selling a limb injury. Rusev kicking out of the 450 was a big moment, and holy hell did Styles aim to erase Aiden English's face on that baseball slide dropkick. I was hoping for a Rusev win here, but Styles is a good champ and they had a good match.

***Okay, here's the thing, I don't want to watch the Iron Man match. But let's see how my evening goes. If Rachel gets a phone call from her sister or something and I'm left with some extra time, sure, I'll give it a shot. But I don't have time to watch 30 minutes of match that might feel like 60 minutes before Sharp Objects, and don't feel like breaking it up into parts. If I'm watching 30 minutes of guys I don't like, I'm diving all in baby!***