Just Call Me Pirata Morgan, I'm Sure To Be The Lucky One When Destiny Assigns Wisdom

Pirata Morgan, Herodes, & El Hijo del Gladiador vs. Perro Aguayo, El Satanico, & Ringo Mendoza EMLL 12/17/1989 - SKIPPABLE

There is no reason for a match with this line-up to be this mediocre. Pirata vs. Satanico is a match-up that should tear down the house, and they were good, but a big step down from what you would expect. Really a step down even from lesser match-ups. Everyone else was just kinda there, save for Gladiador, who was outright shitty down the stretch with his "comical" selling. Yeah, this isn't much of a C+A entry, but there's really not a whole lot to say about this one.

Pirata Morgan, Arandu, & El Verdugo vs. Super Astro, Panterita del Ring, & Blue Demon Jr. Monterrey 1991 - EPIC

Now, this one I do have a few things to say about, not the least of which is "holy shit, this match is motherfucking AWESOME". This match had a little bit of everything: a great first fall built around the rudos destroying the technicos and rubbing it in their faces, a second fall built around more high energy technico offense and comedy routines, and a disgustingly violent third fall where Super Astro spews a load of plasma all over himself while he and Arandu try to kill each other. I don't think I've ever actually seen Arandu before, but he was really good in this, possibly the best guy on his team, which isn't a small feat, even if he was the one most heavily featured. He has a great look with his caveman singlet, tasseled boots, and giant poofy hair. He also seems to be working a forehead-based offense, as he spends at least half the match either punching Astro in the head, clubbing Astro in the head, headbutting Astro (which looks extra cool with his giant hair), or biting Astro in the head, which pays dividends in the end. This is really Super Astro's match, though. He doesn't have a big dive, which is a little surprising (though Panterita del Ring - the young Safari/Ephesto - comes through on that end), but it does show the full complement of other stuff he can do - his bumping, his brawling, his selling, his slick offense, his characterization, and in case I haven't mentioned it already, his blood. God, does he bleed a lot in this. There is a great shot of the mat at one point that looks like a Pollack. But yeah, this is a great match if you want a sense of Astro's depth as a worker, as they mostly ground the flier, and he still looks terrific. Pirata is mostly here to act as Arandu's heavy, it would seem, but he is very good in that role. He looks effortlessly cool as he is kneeing Panterita in the balls is the first fall, and then working bumbling rudo comedy in the second where he accidentally shakes Blue Demon Jr.'s hand and makes this big surprised face when he realizes what he's doing, but he actually transitions between two extremes of character very smoothly, so it never seems out of place. Also have to give some props to the crowd, who took dead aim on Arandu's head with their trash after he fouls Astro leading to the win. There were at least two soda cups that landed square on his noggin during the closing moments of the match and the post-match stuff. I was genuinely impressed.

I should note that Tim Evans - who uploaded this match and a lot of the other matches I've reviewed for this project - made a slight error here. The video linked above only shows the first two falls of the match, but the third fall is in another video labeled "Atlantis, Super Astro & Lizmark vs. Arandu, Pirata Morgan & Angel Blanco". Just wanted to point that out in case anyone else - like me - got confused by that. Fortunately, his mistake is an easy one to work around, and considering he's making a match this good readily available to us, it's not like we'd have much room to complain, anyway. Thanks, Tim!

Pirata Morgan, El Hijo del Pirata Morgan & Eterno vs. Angelico, Veneno, & Toscano IWRG 2/9/2012 - SKIPPABLE

The first couple of minutes of this, entrances included, are actually worth checking out. Veneno's entrance is hilariously goofy. I didn't realize until after the fact that he was supposed to be a joke to begin with (more on that in a second), and I have watched enough AAA to just take it for granted that this guy I haven't seen since he was one of Pierroth's cronies in CMLL is now working a babyface Benny Hinn gimmick, as he places his hand on the foreheads of fans as he walks to the ring. There is one point where he comes up to a fat chick in the first row that everyone around her is pointing to, and it looks like a scene from Magic Mike or something. Then he puts his hand on her forehead, and she puts her hand on his forehead, and he ends up being driven back by the power...Antonio Pena would've wept. Or came. Or both. Toscano's entrance is like what John Cena's entrance must look like to people who hate John Cena. The camera aggressively zooms in and out, he grabs his junk with one hand and waves the other in the air like he just doesn't care, he plays air guitar, he signs the cross on his chest before grabbing his junk again...and then Hijo del Pirata charges down the ramp and punches him in the face. And I'm surprised Pirata didn't spend the rest of the match weeping openly over how proud he is of his son. So the first few minutes have some fun, nasty brawling in them from the rudos, and it's looking pretty great, but then Veneno decides "Hey, you know what this violent brawl really needs? Me working the match like an Osaka Pro comedy undercarder." Veneno is bad. Veneno is really, really bad. I'm at kind of a loss to describe his badness accurately. Apparently, he is working some kind of comedy gimmick, and when it doesn't involve televangelist healing techniques, it involves no-selling literally every bit of offense that comes your way while making the shittiest "funny" faces imaginable and often bursting into laughter. Before too long, any sense that you're watching an actual wrestling match is gone, and you are just watching some guys shitty slapstick comedy routine. Seriously, Kevin Steen would complain about Veneno detracting from his match with bad comedy routines. And shock of shocks, Angelico is still absolutely terrible, too. Toscano was pretty game, and the rudos were all giving it their best effort, but there was no saving this from Veneno, let alone Veneno AND Angelico. This felt like a match where Pirata potatoing Veneno for ten minutes while his son and Eterno chanted "RESPETO!" at him would have been perfectly acceptable.

 COMPLETE AND ACCURATE PIRATA MORGAN