2011 PWG BOLA Road Report, 8/20/11

So once Finlay got announced on a PWG card then my friends and I knew it was time to take a drive down to Reseda for a day. We've been to a few PWG shows before, but not for awhile (last card we went to was the Claudio/Danielson headlock match, which has to be 5+ years at this point). But hey, Finlay will get me out of the house and to the other end of the state on a weekend. So we rented a car, found a hotel room, and drove down the 5, stopping at Portos Cuban bakery (even brought tupperware with me to take back a boatload of potato balls, guava pastry, and medianoche sandwiches), then onto a long night of pro wrestling.

The line around the building was long and by the time we got in the building it was REAL full. There were still a bunch of people in line behind us and I have no clue where they all ended up sitting. They also did not allow food or drink to be brought in, so I had to put my massive bag of Sour Patch Kids back in the car. A gal by the door did allow me to take some licorice that they had taken from a little girl and her grandma, so long as I ate it outside. We managed to get four great seats together, right in front of the entrance curtain and opposite the hard camera. This should ensure plenty of shots of me running and screaming and pushing people out of the way as wrestlers do dives in our section...which ended up happening in practically every match.

1. Chris Hero vs. Willie Mack

This was one of the matches I was really looking forward to, and it did not disappoint in the slightest. I had only seen Mack live once before (as Chocolate Caliente at a Lucha Va Voom show), and he was an entertaining, chunky guy with a decent punch and some pretty great dives. Here he looked at least 30 lb. lighter and really toned up, and was wearing awesome trunks that looked like fishbowl computer wallpaper. This was probably the stiffest match of the night, and when you're on the same card as Fit Fucking Finlay, you deserve a doff of the cap. Opera gloves. I was expecting all the first round matches to go a little shorter, since some of these guys would be working three times, but this felt long, like 20 minutes. It never dragged and it really built to a nice pitch.

Hero throws some nice chops but Mack's chops had Hero's chest bright red by the end of this. Hero's stuff all looked so great up close: The cravate w/ knees, the punches (good lord he threw some great punches in the turnbuckle right in front of me), and FUCK the elbows. He hit some downright NASTY elbows on Willie Mack. Hero's rolling elbow is one of the nastiest things in wrestling today. He planted one right under Willie's chin and later in the match I literally jumped out of my seat when he came off the ropes with one to the back of Willie's head. That SMACK sounded like a gunshot went off in the building. That rolling elbow could have been a quicker way to put down cattle at a slaughterhouse. Also, Hero's rolling yakuza kick *should* look stupid. The move on paper just does not work. But somehow it works REALLY nicely when Hero does it. Hero also had 3 or 4 rad little sliding kicks right to Mack's cheekbones that had to sting.

But none of Mack's comebacks seemed the least bit silly. He always had the feel of a guy fighting from underneath, but a very powerful guy fighting from underneath, and therefore a very dangerous guy. Mack got crossed up on a couple rope running spots, but has a bunch of cool offense, and is really agile for a big guy. He throws a nice elbowdrop, couple big suplexes, hard clothesline, bumps big, has awesome bug eyed facials, has a boss beard (needs to be a bit bigger though), and even plays up how black people have the hardest heads in wrestling (or do Islanders? Any current Islander working a hard head gimmick?). Great spot as Hero threw a GREAT overhand right (everybody loves Hero's elbows but that right hand was thrown 6' away from me and it looked AWESOME) and then sold his hand after bouncing it off of Mack's noggin. Also loved the Human Tornado tribute spot with Mack breaking out the shuck n' jive corner kicks. Hero clearly had done some scouting in the tape room, as when Willie pointed for the ref to "look over there" so he could kick Hero low, Hero yelled "Please god don't look over there!" to no avail. Match was awesome, loved the backslide reversal Mack won with (floating over for extra leverage, never seen that before), and this match delivered BIG. I was really looking forward to it, and it far exceeded my expectations. Possible match of the night right here.

2. Fit Finlay vs. Kevin Steen

THIS was obviously the reason my friends and I drove down. Shoot, Finlay is working Portland in a couple months and I'll likely be going up for that, and that's 4 hours farther than L.A. And Finlay doesn't even have an opponent announced for that show. Fit Finlay is my favorite wrestler of all time, so if I get the chance to see him on some sort of tiny card then I will be taking that chance. The match itself was totally awesome. They started off with a real snug collar and elbow, Finlay went for a lightning fast go behind, right into a nerve hold, kicked Steen's knee out from under him, the grabbed Steen by his fucking palate, wrenches his head back and elbows him right in the fucking NOSE! Steen scrambled up, and then said something like "My nose is fine, by the way." That's just about the dumbest thing you can say to someone like Finlay. When I was a kid and would get spanked for being a little asshole, one time I made the mistake of telling my mom that it didn't even hurt. Guess what happened? Wooden spoon is what happened. THAT shit hurt. Every other time I ever had to get spanked, I sold that shit like I was Shawn Michaels selling to the back row against Hulk Hogan. My mom's hand couldn't hurt a fly? Did not matter. I was taking Psychosis bumps on my fucking head for that shit from that point on. Steen's parents obviously never gave him any boundaries, so it was up to Finlay to draw some for him. Allow me to cut and paste what happened next: Finlay went for a lightning fast go behind, right into a nerve hold, kicked Steen's knee out from under him, the grabbed Steen by his fucking palate, wrenches his head back and elbows him right in the fucking NOSE! How many times does it take a lab rat to learn that he'll get shocked if he pushes a button?

Steen gets up and SLAPS Finlay hard in the face to which Finlay chuckles at, takes him down with a drop toe hold, and instantly locks on across face with his forearm RIGHT across Steen's nose. This was framed perfectly 6 feet in front of my face and I have not wished I had a camera any more badly in the last year than I did at that moment. Finlay also does a picture perfect knee drop right across Steen's face and then the awesome bombs away butt splash, and then stomps BRUTALLY on Steen's fingers a couple times (and I imagine everybody in attendance wanted to see that). It's like when Modern English played my college and they did "Melt With You" three times. They knew what the fucking people wanted. From here we go into a bunch of nasty forearm exchanges, roll to the floor for more forearms, and back in for more that I could not imagine a human being not loving. Couple of great spots where Steen doesn't break clean in the corner, followed by Finlay suckering Steen into the exact same spot and clubbing him. Both men decide to dislocate each others shoulders with a nasty shoulderblock. Now THAT was a collision! Finlay came off the ropes about as hard as he could and just slammed right into Steen, and Steen stood right up to it. I LOVE a good shoulderblock spot, where dudes don't bump it until they've been hit. I fully understand guys that bump early for them, but I love guys that just dish them out and take them.

From here Steen starts working over Finlay's knee and that's the story for the rest of the match. Finlay on the apron and Steen on the floor, Steen grabs the bum wheel and just YANKS it, causing Finlay to take a really great bump on the apron, just legs out from under him and crashing down on his hip. Ouch. Steen wraps Finlay's leg around the corner post, stomps on it, just beats it down. At one point Finlay has his kneepad pulled down and he has visible black and blue marks on the inside of his knee. AWESOME. I like the idea of A) Steen stomping on Finlay's knee until it is black and blue, or B) Finlay noticing earlier in the day he had black and blue marks on his knee, and him going "Let's work this into the match". It works on either level for me. Finlay gets a bunch of little comebacks and Steen keeps beating him down. I get super excited when Steen goes up for a swanton, and lands HARD across Finlay's knees. Finlay hits the Celtic Cross, but his knee is too fucked as he climbs foolishly to the middle rope. Steen yanks his bum wheel again and locks on a tight cloverleaf and Finlay taps. Now, of course I was hoping to see Finlay win here, but it ended up making all of his comebacks really exciting. Between rooting on Finlay live here, and flipping out on every nearfall live when Jerry Lawler almost beat Miz, my lungs have gotten a decent live wrestling workout this year. Awesome match.

3. Claudio Castagnoli vs. El Generico

This was a kinda decent match that turned into an awesome match because of a botched spot. first few minutes are fine, Claudio working over Generico's back with some cool stretches and backbreakers. Sean and I talked about how funny it was that Claudio was using about 4 backbreaker variations one match before a Roderick Strong match. Generico is flexible so it looks real good when Claudio bends him in painful ways. The botch happens when Generico goes for a springboard rana with Claudio nowhere near a good position to take it. As predicted Generico hits him at an awkward angle and there is really nowhere for Claudio to bump it, so Claudio makes a snap judgment call that kicks the match into awesome overdrive: no sell the botch and just start beating the shit out of Generico. He just picks him up and gives him three straight gutwrench powerbombs, each one dropping him harder than the last. Generico keeps getting comebacks, but Claudio keeps coming up with awesome ways to violently make him pay. Big crossbody off the top? Claudio catches him and drills him with a backbreaker. Claudio also does his insane flapjack into a nasty European uppercut, which is basically the only example of Street Fighter II Turbo-as-pro wrestling that looks good, and it looks GREAT. Generico gets some cool crucifix counters and close roll ups, and there was an epic moment where they were both fighting on the top rope to see who could to a stupider move. Claudio goes for a top rope Riccola Bomb, Generico tries countering to a brainbuster, Claudio reverses that into a Riccola Bomb that almost gets pulled off but Generico hits a rana that Claudio rolls through, only to have Generico roll through that for a roll-up win. This was the best way to do a roll-up win for Generico as Claudio had taken 90% of the match and I just wouldn't have bought Generico being able to hold him down any other way. But this way really used a bunch of Claudio's momentum against him and the match overall was really fun with a GREAT finishing stretch.

4. Eddie Edwards vs. Roderick Strong

Well this was what it was. Taken in 5 second random snapshots, it had a lot of impressive moments. But in the end they were all empty and meant nothing. All the spots looked good, but who cares when they don't build anywhere? Strong hit a brutal backdrop suplex on the apron, but it must not have been that brutal as 3 seconds later Edwards hit a vertical suplex on the apron and then did a moonsault off of it. And that's kinda the story of the match. If you're into lifeless move and hold exhibitions, then this is for you. I personally do not care to see somebody fight to get out of an ankle lock, then just stand up and hit a big move. Ending gets ridiculous as it completely kills the crowd. Edwards hit a fucking MASSIVE double stomp from the top rope to Strong lying on the ring apron, then Strong rolls into the ring, stands up, and gets hit by another stomp off the top from Edwards. Not only does this only get a 2 count (which was the point where the crowd went dead silent), but THEN....it gets followed up with a Malenko/Guerrero roll-up sequence!! The same exact sequence YOU were tired of in 1998 (maybe earlier for some of you). I tell Rachel this would be an ideal time for her to use the ladies room. Big moves were hit, big moves were reversed, somebody won at some point.

5. The Dynasty (Joey Ryan & Scorpio Sky) vs. RockNES Monsters (Johnny Goodtime & Johnny Yuma)

This match was kind of a hot mess. Some individual things worked, some things did not. I had heard some good things about Goodtime, but was not very impressed here. He would likely appeal to the types of folks who enjoy wink wink nudge nudge Street Fighter II Turbo moves-as-wrestling (the E. Honda 100 Hand Slap in the corner was mildly amusing, just not what I was looking for). Yuma didn't do much for me at all. He looked kinda like Vince Noir from Mighty Boosh and had some Young Bucks offense. BUT, he was also responsible for the best part of the match as Ryan chucked him into the crowd from the ring, and Yuma went SPLAT through a bunch of chairs and ended up splayed out in a real nasty way. I wish I would have gotten a better look at it, but the chairs he splattered through were the ones we were sitting in, so I got the fuck out of Dodge, screaming like a girl as I ran and shoved women out of my way. Match kind went off the rails at this point as all 4 guys were in at once and it was pretty cluttered. We get some stereo moves (dual frogsplashes) and some big suplexes (Ryan dumped Yuma with a pretty nasty pumphandle German) and the match ends in a roll up. At this point in the show I react larger to roll ups than any big head drops, since 4 of the first 5 matches have ended with one. The double stomp from the top to the apron? Sitting on my hands. No way that can finish a match. Small package? Oh snap, this could be it!

Young Bucks run out and start shooting about how they don't shake hands and it. is. horrible. Both Bucks are very punchable. This promo sets up KoW vs. Bucks for later which should actually be pretty good. I wanted Finlay to be involved somehow, because how much fun does Finlay vs. one of the Bucks sound!? A man can dream.

6. Willie Mack vs. El Generico

Match starts with a long dance contest. Not my cup of tea, but it didn't feel out of place here. I actually kinda figured that this would be a comedy match, since Mack worked a LONG match against Hero that was stiff as all get out. Plus he is kinda chubby. So yeah, we get dancing. Crowd seemed into it, so I can't complain too much. Comedy continues as they do dueling Human Tornado corner kicks. Eventually the match got rolling and Mack looked really good, busting out a bunch of cool offense that he didn't get to use in the Hero match, including a great knee drop. You know the kinda knee drop AJ Styles does? Mack did that, except he's bigger and thus it looks even more awesome. Mack has a bunch of cool throws and Generico bumped a clothesline really nicely. But eventually Generico cam back with a nice yakuza kick in the corner and ended it with a brainbuster. Match was the shortest of the night and enjoyable enough. It naturally wasn't as good as each guy's first matches, but I'd rather have two really good matches and one OK comedy match than 3 OK-decent matches. So both guys going long in the first match was way worth it.

7. Kevin Steen vs. Eddie Edwards

More comedy mixed in with some stuff I thought was silly in an unintentional comedy way. Match started off with a silly shoulderblock exchange. Now again, I love a real nice, hard hitting shoulderblock. They look nasty and it makes my joints and torso hurt by thinking about someone running into me at that speed. So Steen and Eddie just start exchanging them like they're chops. One guy would bounce off the ropes and hit one, and that would cause the other guy to bounce off the opposite ropes and hit one, and so on and so forth until the move was killed dead. Just boing shoulderblock boing shoulderblock boing shoulderblock over and over again and it was kinda dumb. Then we went into a long eyepoke segment that was pretty amusing. I can't ever hate on an eyepoke spot, though they kind of ran them into the ground here. There was a really fun spot where Edwards threw Steen to the floor, and made the crowd clear out of the way for a dive. You bet your ass I ran out of there. Edwards runs off the opposite ropes, does a fast baseball slide kick to the floor, and then just pokes Steen in the eye. Then they bite each other for awhile, and then they go into wrestling is serious strike exchange, while the fans are chanting Kill, Steen, Kill....and....this shit just doesn't work all together.

Sometimes Steen is really wrestling-as-serious business, and sometimes he's wacky guy hamming it up to the crowd, and sometimes it's both all at once, and I just don't buy it. It's like on The Office, when Michael Scott is such a buffoon and completely unrealistic, but then there would be an occasional episode where something bad happens to Michael and you were supposed to feel sympathy for him...but it was impossible to feel sorry for him because he was so unrealistic most of the time. Steen has this real obnoxious habit of just tossing off loud one liners to the crowd in a match. Not so much working the crowd at all, but just stopping a match to be Henny Youngman for awhile, and then restarting the match where it left off. There's working the crowd, and then there's just trying to get a chuckle, and he always goes for the latter no matter the mood of the match. So they are serious, then they get some yucks, and whatever.

Then since doing a long silly shoulderblock exchange wasn't enough, they do dueling superkicks. I'm...kinda speechless on that one. Eddie Edwards took a superkick...then just kinda hit a superkick back. Didn't sell it or anything, just kinda...did a superkick after being hit with one. I'm...confused? How can anybody be interested in two guys pretending to fight if at any point moves that we have collectively determined hurt a whole bunch can just suddenly not hurt anymore? Moves mean something because we know each worker's history with each move. And this wasn't even some fighting spirit nonsense or anything, just taking a move that's usually a big deal, and doing the same move back with no harm done. I guess I'm just really confused by what they were going for there. Like, will other wrestlers see that and go "Oh shit, didn't know that was an option." Is Eddie Edwards the annoying kid in elementary school who would just pretend he didn't get tagged when everybody was playing tag? I hated that fucking kid. Is he Michael Myers? Who got shot 6 times in Halloween and fell off a balcony and then came back for Halloween II and got shot a bunch more (including in the face!) and then burned alive and still came back? I don't know if Edwards has the acting chops to pull off Michael Myers. And so we get more moves, we get more counters, and I assume at some point for some reason one of these moves will keep one of these guys down for one more second than all of the other moves kept them down for. And so the world turns.

8. Kings of Wrestling vs. The Young Bucks

This was a comedy match that worked quite well for me, and I have to give a lot of credit to the Bucks here. I have never seen them play heel and they were really great at being big bumping, stooging goofy heels. Hero and Claudio work a bunch of double teams with them like the double rowboat spot and the Bucks bump into place hilariously and slip on banana peels and fall on each others' groins and it's actually pretty great. Now, they were not as entertaining when they went into their heel control section, and I actually fell asleep at that point so I can't really say why they were not as entertaining. I can't blame them for me falling asleep, as it was like 11:45 at this point and I had been up since 2:30 A.M. and drove down from the Bay Area and had a giant lunch at Portos....or maybe it was their fault and their offense is so boring it put me to sleep. Who knows. Either way we still get a bunch of fun spots from everybody, with Hero elbowing and kicking everyone in sight, and Claudio hitting an insanely long giant swing (with Hero booting them in the face to end it!). Matt gets the pin with his feet on the ropes and this may have been the last KoW indie match for quite some time. KoW hit their MASSIVE finisher on Matt after the match is over and he takes it like a champ.

9. Kevin Steen vs. El Generico

Final was pretty fun and had a lot of nasty moves that got kicked out of, but it all worked fine in context. Match started right away as Steen was in the ring and Generico ran out and they went at it. Generico really just burst through those ropes and almost took out a dude walking past the curtain and then almost plowed into the ringside cameraman. Crowd is real into this as everybody is standing at this point, they brawl all over the building, Generico overshoots a couple crazy dives, chairs get tossed, a kid in a Generico mask gets taunted while Steen locks on the cloverleaf (the move that ended his other two matches), both guys hit completely nasty package piledrivers, Generico boots Steen's head off a couple times, and wins with a NASTY brainbuster on the apron. The match was under 10 minutes, but was all action and in the moment it totally worked.

Great fun show overall, totally worth driving down for. Next show doesn't sound worth driving over from Burbank to see (Ricky Romero and Davey Richards!!!), but if Finlay is on a card again, you can count me in. Favorite match of the night might have been Hero/Mack, but Finlay/Steen, and Claudio/Generico were great as well. All other matches had at minimum some decent moments (Edwards spits really high and there was a fun moment in the Steen match where he somehow managed to spit on the same crowd member two different times from two different spots in the ring. That's some impressive spitting right there. It took Haruka Eigen's art and turned it into high art), and at minimum were very good.

I would recommend going out of your way to see this show, with three great matches and some real fun ones. Get on it.