ROH TV Workrate Report: 3/14/11

So this might be it. I went to DVR next week's ROH TV and it was not scheduled. Maybe it's taking a short break for March Madness? Maybe this is done. I'll write this report as if it were the last time I was watching ROH on my TV.

Bravado Brothers promo to start!! Oh...it's the same promo from like 2 months ago.

1. Bravado Brothers vs. Grizzly Redwood/Bobby Dempsey to start! We don't get to see these guys that often, so I'd rather have this on my TV than one last Chris Daniels match. Dempsey has the most unfortunate fat face. He looks like a bad present-day Artie Lange. Dempsey hits a great headbutt and tags in Grizzly. I'm not sure which Bravado is which. I think Harlem has the straight hair, and Lance has the curly hair. Grizzly gets thrown around really nicely, and Lance has a nice forearm shot. Harlem works a bearhug on Grizzly, and it's a little disappointing that Grizzly doesn't have a bearhug in his arsenal. Call it the Haggerty Hold. I dig Dempsey's one-armed singlet. His hair is a disappointment to fatties everywhere. It would work if he was a heel. Bravados pull out their San Diego Chicken offense and do a crossbody to Dempsey while the other is on all fours behind him, sending Bobby tumbling to defeat. Well that was fun and at 5 minutes didn't have time to lag. I'm gonna miss you guys.

TPT Finals tonight!

2. Pancration Rules Match! KO, subs only, no closed fists to the head, no hitting the back of the head, no knees on the ground, ropes in play.....Davey Richards vs. Tony Kozina! OK, for someone who has not liked a Davey match in 3+ years, this match sounds kinda cool on paper. I dig Kozina, and the confined rules might keep Davey from getting too shitty. It starts with them circling each other like RINGS fighters, open hand slaps and leg kicks. Davey knocks Tony down with a high kick and maneuvers into a guillotine, but Tony rolls out and both get back to their feet. Tony takes 2 kicks to the elbow and sells it real nice. Both throw knees from the clinch and the struggle within the clinch looks good. Tony gets leverage and dumps Davey on his head. Davey up and goes for a desperation takedown, and runs right into a knee from Tony. Davey turtles up and Tony blasts him with strikes on the ground before getting a rear naked choke. Davey fights up and reverses into mount and then foolishly goes for an ankle lock. What is this Davey, 1992? Tony gets the ropes and Davey kicks him in the same elbow again, then kicks him in the face. Kozina gets hit with a running knee and after some palm strikes on the ground, the ref calls it off. Best Davey match you will see. It was 5 minutes, cool action, and it took away all his stupid handsprings and fighting spirit. Davey doing faux-MMA is so much better than Davey doing pro wrestling.

Embassy is out, with no Necro. He has Princess Mia, Ernesto Osiris, and a guy in a green blazer/turtleneck combo (like Carl Sagan!!). I always like Nana on the stick. Nana introduces the newest Embassy member and it is......

Tomasso Ciampa? Cannot say I'm familiar. He is ambiguously brown and has a mohawk.

3. Tomasso Ciampa vs. Mike Sydal. Sydal you know because he has maybe the worst tattoos in wrestling, and you know the ground that covers? Mia gets shots in on Sydal and throws a nice superkick, especially for someone wearing a dress. Sydal has really lousy kicks and elbows. They are so light and fluffy and painless. Ciampa agrees as he is not hurt and blasts Sydal with a clothesline. Then does a completely preposterous but fun powerbomb into backcracker. You can't do it on an opponent over 130 lb., but it looks cool so who cares.

4. And now we got the finals of the TPT'11, Kyle O'Reilly vs. Mike Bennett. Crowd is amped for Kyle. They SMELL the upset. I am nervous as there are still 25 minutes left in the episode and that seems like a looooong time for them. We start the match as 80% of ROH matches start: headlock takeovers, rope running, some shoulderblocks...then we cut to Corino impressed with the match, talking to nobody in particular. "Yeah. Good, good. Wow, that was nice." Bennett gets knocked to the floor and then gets thrown into the rail. He plows into that rail as if he were applying for a gig in NOAH. O'Reilly again does his awesome dropkick from the apron through his opponent, and it looks even more impressive here as the guardrail comes unlatched and it looks like he kicked Bennett so hard that he flew into the rail and broke the rail apart. Stuff happens as I type that, and Bennett gains control with a DDT on the entrance ramp, which O'Reilly takes at a real awkward angle. Kyle gets back into the ring at the 19 count, doing an admirable stumble sell to make it back in. Bennett, instead of capitalizing on his stumbling opponent, goes for a resthold, which O'Reilly eventually backdrops out of. Bennett is selling major fatigue for some reason. I predict Kyle will take the next 6 minutes, and Bennett will hit his finisher to win. Nevermind, Bennett hits a decent spinebuster. O'Reilly gets some kicks, and a missle dropkick gets two. Ewwwwww then we go into a real ugly "MMA" sequence where O'Reilly takes a month and fumbles around before getting Bennett into a sloppy triangle that would impress NO one. O'Reilly transitions into a guillotine and Bennett powers up and hits his finisher. Well this match peaked during the big dropkick and DDT on the floor. O'Reilly did a real good stumble back to the ring and acted concussed, but back in the ring it was business as usual and it didn't have too much heat from there.

Bennett has words with Corino afterwards, making fun of all his crummy advice he gave to the losers of the tournament. It takes approximately 30 slow minutes to build to Bennett punching Corino, and when it finally happens it's just not worth it at all. Murdoch punching Dibiase this was not.