Segunda Caida

Phil Schneider, Eric Ritz, Matt D and occasional guests write about pro wrestling. Follow us @segundacaida

Friday, August 06, 2010

SEGUNDA CAIDA DECLARES WAR!!! 11/29/94

WE DECLARE WAR

Mikiko Futagami/Mizuki Endo v. Jen Yukari/Michiko Oumaki

Pretty pedestrian Joshi match. I think these ladies may be from LLPW , which is the most average wrestling in the world. There were a couple of nice suplexes at the end of the match, but otherwise it was all bridges and shrieking.

Masao Orihara v. Yuji Yasuraoka

This is a battle of really great hair, Yasuraoka doesn't have the full died tip mullet yet, but it is on the way. Orihara is rocking a blonde high spiked double mohawk, he looks like the tour bus coke dealer for the Germs. I really liked large parts of this match, Yuji was game and brought a lot of energy, and Orihara was in full asskicker mode, spin kicking Yasuroka in the eye, slapping him the ear and stomping him in the head. We had a really great dive where Orihara flips over the ref and annihilates Yuji with a somersault plancha. Match fell off at the end, as both guys start no selling piledrivers which is something which really pisses me off. Orihara has a great piledriver and there is no need for that horseshit in an undercard juniors match.

Ultimo Dragon/Ultimocito Dragon v. Pirata Morgan/Piratita Morgan

Man is Ultimo short, he looked like he had maybe 2 inches on his mini. This was totally fun, pretty much a straight 90's AAA style lucha tag, with a bunch of nifty ranas and armdrags leading into some off the charts crazy dives. Ultimocito is a fucking lunatic in this match, he gets bodyslammed into the seats, does a wild plancha, a somersault tope into the third row, and finishes it off with a top rope over the ring post moonsault which looked like it might have ended his tiny career. Both Pirata and Piratita were rudoing the fuck out of the match, bumping great and eating all of the fancy technico offense great. Ultimo had some moments, but he also really blew a couple of rana's badly and completely botched the finish, it looked like he was going for a running shooting star, but flubbed it. Still really enjoyable spotfest.

Ryuma Go/Animal Hamaguchi vs. Masanobu Kurisu/Nobukazu Hirai

This is your old man potato fest of the show. I am always down for these kind of matches although this wasn't a high end version. Animal v. Kurisu was the higlight as they landed coconut headbutts and on each other and chopped each other really hard. Hirai was kind of the odd man out, as he was too young and not surly enough to really fit in. Go seemed really over as a comedy guy, but didn't bring the violence as much as Animal and Kurisu, his final run with Hirai was actually kind of bad, luckily they tag out and let Kurisu and Hamiguchi smash their heads together some more.

The Eliminators vs. Vampiro/Hiroshi Itakura

As big a train wreck as it looks on paper. Close your eyes and visualize a karate standoff between Vampiro and John Kronus, now take how much that vision sucked and add thirty percent more sucking. Eliminators hit Total Elimination in the first move which is pretty much the only thing you want to see them do, then it goes another ten minutes. I have actually enjoyed other WAR Eliminators, however this was reprehensible.

Jado/Gedo v. Aka Ono/Ai Ono

The Ono's were Kim Duk and Don Muraco under devil masks, and they did an amusing job of awkwardly stiffing and crowbaring Jado and Gedo. It had the feel of one of those particularly surly APA matches. Muraco especially was too fat and lazy to protect his opponents at all, as he just murdered Jado with a poorly executed piledriver. My favorite bit of Muraco bullshit was during a double suplex when Duk goes down, but Muraco just throws his opponent down unwilling to even take a single back bump. Duk also powerbombed Gedo kidneys first on one of those unbreakable Japaneese tables. Jado and Gedo actually get the flash pin, but that doesn't stop them from getting wrecked even more. Not anything approaching a good match, but I enjoyed it.

Genichiro Tenryu v. Tatsumi Kitahara

This is exactly what we thought it was, the two stiffest nastiest fuckers in WAR, kicking and chopping each other unnecessarily hard. Kitihara comes out firing, backing Tenryu in the corner with kicks, and Tenryu stops conversation with a thunderous chop to the throat. That is pretty much the story of the match, not a ton of moves, mostly both guys cracking each other. Tenryu is very good at working near falls against lesser guys. He gets drilled with a couple of head kicks just barely beating the count, and really puts Kithara over as a dangerous guy. Of course he mutilates him with stuff, nothing I love more then reckless Tenryu clotheslines and he delivers a couple of corkers. Nothing complicated about this match at all just a batch of violence.

Ricky Fuyuki v. Kendo Nagasaki

I wasn't expecting much out of this match, but it was a total blast. Crazy late 90's WWF main event style lumberjack match, with constant brawling with lumberjacks, blood, chairshots and mayhem. Nagasaki was shockingly good in this, he bleeds a ton, takes a couple of nice sized bumps to the floor and had good looking brawling. Fuyuki is taylor made for this kind of crazy, as he was the director of all the luncacy. We got Tenryu brawling with Nagasaki, Jado and Gedo throwing chairs and tables around, some Ai Ono and Fuyuki brawling, Nagasaki undoing a ring bolt and chocking Fuyuki with the rope. Just all kinds of fun mayhem. Well worth checking out

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