Uprising: Lucha Libre Workrate Report 3/9/14

These matches were from the 5/10/13 card in Sacramento that also had a Hijo Del Santo match. Here's betting that match mysteriously never airs.

1. Willie Mack vs. Phoenix Star vs. Brian Cage vs. Ultimo Panda

Cage is juiced to the gills (working a border patrol gimmick is pretty ironic since if I saw a guy crossing the border that looked as gassed as Cage, I would instantly flag him) and what's crazy is that I've seen him on two Bay Area shows within the last month and he's gotten even more massive. If you saw the TNA gut check match with him from a year ago, and then saw what he looks like now? He's put on a dangerous amount of muscle mass in one year. For some reason whenever they have Willie Mac in one of these elimination matches he's always the first guy eliminated, which is lunacy since Panda and Phoenix Star aren't very good. Mac is perfect for these types of matches, as he's a big fat guy who has a bunch of cool offense. I've seen him work long singles matches before so I know he has a decent gas tank. Here he does all his fun stuff like big flying heel kick and awesome standing moonsault. He's also really fun working lucha exchanges as he's just as smooth as tiny guys, but seeing a big guy do a rolling kip-up is way cooler. Now they actually did something right here and started the match at the actual bell time. Usually they show every second of each guy's entrance which is hilarious on a show they pay to air. But they do something that pisses me off just as much, as Mac's elimination happens during the commercial break! This is a taped show, and it's a match that happened almost a year ago. You couldn't figure out how to air this match in full? That is unspeakably annoying. Cage has to hold the rest of this together which he does well, able to take all of Star's armdrags and advancing each spot so it isn't just an Eliminators movez exhibition. Panda's offense never looks that great and he always does a lot of distracting mask adjusting and shorts hiking, but he takes moves well and gets blasted by a Cage clothesline that looked great. Finish was cool with Cage turning a Gory Special into a kind of Sister Abigail which was a nice lucha move with a modern twist. Fun match, but it's going to gnaw at me wondering how much was edited out...

2. Pequeno Halloween vs. Octagoncito

Really fun match that's needlessly shit all over because of a heel ref gimmick getting shoehorned into everything. Sparky Ballard actually makes for a good heel ref, but I have zero interest whatsofuckingever in seeing refs hone their character chops. Still, you ignore eyerolling slow counts and match interrupting bullshit and you focus on Octagoncito hitting a nutso high speed dive into the dirt (match took place in the dirt rodeo arena at a county fair) and Halloween hitting his awesome under the bottom rope sliding splash to the dirt. Pequeno Halloween is killer bumping around for all of Octagoncito's armdrags and flips and flops and I kinda regret not going to this show. I mean jeez, Peq. Halloween and Santo in an outdoor fair setting. Seems like a no brainer (a quick date check shows that I was seeing Yo La Tengo in SF that night, so that's kind of a pretty good excuse).

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Uprising: Lucha Libre Workrate Report 2/15/14

This is appropriate as this match is from their 2/23/13 San Francisco show at John O'Connell high school, which is exactly where I am going tonight to see them. So they're showing the main event to their last show there, right before the next show. That's a cool idea. Good work, guys. They had a couple full commercials advertising tonight's show as well, though oddly billing Rocky Romero as 2nd from the top. You obviously lead with Blue Demon Jr., but I would think Super Crazy would be your 2nd lead. Who even knows who Rocky Romero is?

1. Brian Cage, Derek Sanders & Phoenix Star vs. Blue Demon Jr., El Dinamita & Kafu

Kafu is billed as being 6'4" which is hilarious as that means Demon would be about 6'1", and if you've ever stood next to a luchador you know the odds of them being over 6' are slim. We get a lot of ganging up on Demon to start which is cool, as most Demon matches I've seen don't see him selling or showing much ass. But all the rudos here get to take turns chopping him while he is helpless. Brian Cage is freaking massive at this point. He's close to Jon Anderson levels. He has a look that would work well in WWE, if they didn't do wellness testing. You know who may be a worse wrestler than Blue Demon Jr.? Kafu. I remember when this guy broke into APW and had a silly capoeira gimmick, and then went through his long Brody gimmick, and now is just some sort of semi-Brody who has been working 12 years and can't throw a clothesline. I don't think I've ever seen a match of his where he was anything but the worst guy in the match. Gotta tip my cap to Demon in this one as he clearly has his working boots on in this match. His kicks on Cage look real nice, then he does a nice double dropkick to clear Cage/Sanders out of the ring, and then actually breaks out a spinning headscissors against Phoenix Star! Follows that up with a nice baseball slide dropkick to the floor with a cool uppercut I've never seen him use. Who the hell is this guy? I hope he shows up when I'm there tonight. The match itself was fine, if not a little predictable. Once the tecnicos took over at the 2/3 point there was no real looking back. Not excited at all for the feuding refs things they have going on between Sparky Ballard and Tom Castor. Match ends with Sparky pulling up lame during Blue Demon's likely pinfall victory, but then Tom Castor saves the day by running in and usurping Sparky's authority. Man I don't want to see feuding refs. Maybe if the good guy ref was like a local kid with cancer or something and he got to come in and be the hero. I think that's the only thing that could make me enjoy that spot. I want my refs to be wallpaper, not focal angles during a match.

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Uprising: Lucha Libre Workrate Report 2/1/14

This is from the 1/27/13 show in Watsonville, CA, so we're at least getting stuff within a calendar year. So, I've done over 15 reports on this TV show. You readers that actually read the reports have probably noticed that I bitch and complain about how lousy (for the most part) this show has been. This is not hate-viewing on my part, I just really, really want this show to actually be good. They're a local fed with some workers that I like and it's rough watching them botch so many things in regards to the TV show and presentation. I don't think they're maximizing their opportunity. Over the last few episodes they've at least advertised the dates of their upcoming shows, which should have been a no-brainer from the beginning. They don't do any interviews or background on any of the wrestlers, the spend WAY too much time showing entrances (more on that in a bit), they often feature workers that haven't worked the fed in 2+ years, they put over the referees way too much during commentary. It's like the only lucha they've watched is Guadalajara, as it genuinely feels like the only episode-to-episode continuity they're building up is a potential Tom Castor vs. Sparky Ballard referees feud. There is no rhyme or reason to the matches they air. The dates of shows jump around wildly. The last three weeks have been one match each from one card in July 2012, the week before was some random matches from May 2010. One of the matches was not even particularly good. I'm unsure the benefits of showing almost 4 year old material, but there can't be many if the material in question isn't even good. "Hey, did you hear this Stone Temple Pilots album from 2010? It was horrible! But you should check out their new stuff!" Who are you? Why are you talking about a bad album from 4 years ago?  Why are you talking about STP? But then add to that the fact this is a PAID timeslot. They are paying to show this stuff. So if you're not showing your most recent stuff and making people want to see your current product, you'd likely want to showcase your best all-time matches. A mixture of both would make a lot of sense. "Here's some of our current roster, and here's a classic example of the kind of action you can expect LIVE!" It seems so simple. And yet...

1. El Mariachi, La Pantera & Ultimo Panda vs. Famous B, Fantasma de la Opera & Persian Prince

Over the last few weeks they've gone in a simple presentation direction, either as a way to focus more on specific guys, or (more realistically) as a way to milk their recorded footage to cover more airings. To do this they've been airing just one match per episode, regardless of match length. Thing is, I don't know if I've seen a match in the promotion go over 15 minutes, which means they have one short match stretched out over a full 1/2 hour of programming. It happened the other week with the Lady Apache match, and here we go again. We get FULL wrestler ring entrances and full announcer introduction. Each wrestler comes out separately. Slaps fives with the fans, walks all around the ring. We see ALL of this. We get to the 11 minute mark. Still entrances. We go to a commercial break. Long story long the first actual physical exchange does not happen until my DVR reads 16 minutes. 16 minutes!! Of a 30 minute show that you PAY TO AIR! How is this even possible!? Even then we get a lot of stalling to start, leading us into another commercial. So essentially most of the first 2/3 of their money was spent on guys walking to the ring, standing in the ring, and then doing "who can get this side of the crowd to cheer louder!?" spots. Good lord.

Match itself was fairly decent, as decent as a 9 minute match hacked by commercial breaks into 3 parts could be. La Pantera is not *THEE* Pantera, so pretty lame choice of name there. Panda is a smart gimmick by the promotion of putting a chubby not-very-good guy into a Kung Fu Panda costume. Doesn't matter that he's not good, the kids love it and it gets easy pops. Smart move. The rudos (team with Famous B) don't really get much offense, which is another thing that's really starting to grate on me about this promotion. Most of the matches are just extended tecnico squash matches. It's fine to have those on the card, give the kids something to cheer for, but 80% of the matches they air are tecnicos running wild on rudos, rudos rolling to the floor, and then tecnicos winning. Hardly any times in peril.

Why am I paying money to see these goofs live this weekend? Well, because they booked Timothy Thatcher and Super Crazy. But also...Rocky Romero Workrate Report coming this weekend!!!

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Early One Mornin' While Makin The Rounds Black Terry Took a Shot of Cocaine and Shot His Woman Down

Black Terry/Bombero Infernal/Dr. Cerebro v. Apolo Estrada Jr./Avisman/El Hijo del Diablo IWRG 12/22/13-GREAT

It has been a rough year for IWRG but they close it out with a flashback brawl. Cererbo and Terry had a series of awesome wars with Avisman and Diablo a couple of years ago. Our two new additions Estrada and Infernal acquitted themselves great. Estrada especially ruled he was wandering around bleeding out of his forehead and unleashes two crazy topes in the ending run where everyone in the match is just trying to jam his opponent through the back of the arena with dives. Cerebro is such a bull and he is throwing people around and sneaking in headbutts.  Terry wandering around and throwing punches and chairs is one of my favorite things in wrestling and it is even more awesome with his slick mustache. I did miss the Black Terry Jr. camera work, which added such a grimy awesome look, still lets hope this is more of what we can expect in the new year.

COMPLETE AND ACCURATE BLACK TERRY

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Lucha Azteca Workrate Report 1/4/14

These matches all aired on the 12/20 Arena Mexico card.

1. Leyenda de Plata semi-final cibernetico: Virus, Averno, Okumura, Olimpico, Felino & Tiger vs. Titan, Stuka Jr., Atlantis, Delta, Triton & La Mascara

This had the right amount of big spots to work well for me. I had some friends over while watching it so it's kind of the perfect thing to throw on while you're part watching/part chatting as you don't have to follow any sort of psychology or match storyline very closely. It's just guys coming in and doing their thing, so big spots stand out to you and stop the conversation, and the rest of the stuff kinda flies by the subconscious. Atlantis had a nice run in the middle, giving out spinning backbreakers to anybody that got close. Averno bumped all around for flippy juiced up tecnicos, including a painful bump off the apron from a nutty Titan somersault headscissors. La Mascara splats on the floor with a flip dive that doesn't quite get caught. Stuka's hands-free body press over the turnbuckle is absolutely breathtaking and completely insane, as is Delta's crazy flip dive that sees him run up the turnbuckles from the apron and vault over the other side. Also, Virus is Virus. This match was a blast and was made to look infinitely better when I stopped my DVR and Impact was on and killed the entire room.

2. Reapper vs. Volador Jr.

Boy, I am just not feeling Volador ever since the tecnico turn. He feels just totally neutered now. He used to work real well as a tweener, and he had great body charisma. That seems almost completely gone now, and getting to see his smooth pretty boy face doesn't really help things. The mask match basically killed any sort of rudo believability in him. I also used to think it was cool when he would do something goofy like come out dressed as Darth Maul, but now dressing like Spider-man -without a mask - just makes him look like a kid wearing his Spider-man jammie jams while his mother screams at him to stop doing flips on the couch. "But moooooommmmm, I'm practicing almost killing Reapper with a Spanish Flyyyyy!!!!!"

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Lucha Azteca Workrate Report, 12/14/13

These matches took place on the 11/29 Arena Mexico show.



1. Atlantis, Diamante Azul & Shocker vs. Ultimo Guerrero, Euforia & Tama Tonga

Match starts out as a pretty slow-paced nothing type affair, and sometime around the middle of the 2nd picks up a bit, before having a hot as hell tercera caida. Ultimo and Atlantis stood out early with both guys working fast (Atlantis can often slowly go through the motions, so it was noticeable here that UG was forcing him to pick up the pace on their sequences). This is probably the best I've seen Shocker look in months as he's moving as fast as early decade slim(mer) Shocker as he breaks out a cool headscissors and starts working circles around Euforia, to the point that Euforia appears to gas out! Yes, modern Shocker caused somebody else to blow up. Third fall is awesome as everybody starts working up a notch, with Azul doing his crazy somersault senton into the corner and a crazy flip dive off the ramp way, Atlantis working fast and throwing spinning backbreakers at everyone who comes near, UG bumping around big and cutting low on lariats, just tons of fun in the 3rd. I was seriously ready to write this off after the first and I'm glad I didn't.



2. Torneo Cibernetico: Kraneo, Psyco Ripper, Volador Jr., Morphosis & Mr. Aguila vs. Blue Panther, Mascara Dorada, Valiente, Mistico & La Mascara

These ciberneticos are like lucha junk food. Depending on the participants they can be really good, or they can be like a lot of so-so lightning matches stacked on top of each other. Thanks to the internet we can at least see all the opening matwork (which was almost always edited off Galavision broadcasts). Panther and Morphosis tear it up for the first couple minutes, with Morphosis (the former Histeria) really impressing me with not only keeping up with BP but tossing off some cool armbar transitions and leglocks. Kraneo gets paired up with Dorada which is hilarious since Dorada is probably the fastest guy on the tecnicos side. Kraneo squashes him with a nice leg drop and then catches a cool rana from Dorada. Eliminations start early (which always happens in these which is disappointing as these matches could really go twice as long as they normally do) which robs us of some potentially awesome pairings. The brief Panther/Volador pairing was a treat as I don't remember these two matching up before and it's only 20 seconds but made me want to see a bunch more. Bunch of wild dives happen, people gang up awesomely on Kraneo with him taking a headscissors to the floor from Valiente and then eating two dives in a row (with Dorada's being completely reckless and has him ricocheting off Kraneo on the floor). Kraneo towers over everybody here, with he and Valiente looking like Batman coming face to face with Killer Croc. Kraneo uses his size well, knowing when to cut off tiny little tecnicos by just running into them. Shame that Aguila is one of the final two rudos with Psyco Ripper and Volador. Aguila is clearly the worst guy in this cibernetico (watch him hit the worst standing moonsault I've ever seen, then not call an audible and still end an elimination with it!). Overall the match was fun as hell and got plenty of time. Dorada is a lunatic, Kraneo is my new fattie obsession, Volador still gots the goods even though I liked him more when he worked full rudo instead of this tweener mess he's in now.

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Lucha Azteca Workrate Report 12/7/13

These matches were from the 11/22 Arena Mexico show. Also, I should be thanking cubsfan a lot more than I do, not only for uploading all these matches, but for sending a lot of you our way whenever we do lucha reviews. The guy is awesome. You knew that.



1. Blue Panther, Atlantis & La Mascara vs. Kraneo, Psyco Ripper & Vangellys

This was really fun and what's funny is the TV version cut out the coolest minute of the match. At the 17:30-18:45 part, Panther hits a sweet rana off the top, Kraneo bumps huge to the floor and takes a dangerous looking backdrop into the ropes, and then Psyco Ripper takes some sort of maniacal hybrid Cassandro/Hamrick bump by flying out the corner and around the ringpost, then landing on his back. Pretty sure Kraneo and Psyco Ripper are my new favorite guys. Kraneo is the former Alebrije, whose body is now 35% Golden Corral Chocolate Wonderfall. Psyco is the former Psicosis II who was always much better than most people assumed. Kraneo is just the coolest as he's gigantic both in height and in width, but he busts his ass harder the fatter he gets. I can just picture him at dinner with other workers saying "Yeah, I'm gonna eat this second entree. And then I'll get in the ring and work harder than all of you!" He's super fat now and he's working harder than I've ever seen him work. Everybody needs to get on the Kraneo bus (it makes frequent stops for snacks).




2. Negro Casas vs. Rush

Well this was a match I assume a lot of internet lucha fans were looking forward to. But I could not tell you why it was so damn short. I'm not sure why it wasn't the main event, and I'm not sure why it was only a una caida. I would assume there are going to be more singles between these two, hopefully including a hair match with blood! For a 10 minute match, this was really good. I wanted a 25 minute epic, but for the 10 minute match I got, it was really good. Both guys have great chemistry with the other and holy lord do they have no problem dishing out seated dropkicks to each others' face. So many nasty kicks, with one on the outside against the barricade being especially gross. I liked the end with Casas cheating to win with leg wrapped around the ropes. I liked seeing Casas on the defense for the bulk of this after taking an early nasty kick from Rush. It gave it a Fujiwara type "looking for a way to sneak a comeback" element. I was pretty bummed when I realized the one pinfall was the end, as I was thinking "Oh man, if the first fall was THAT hot then this is shaping up to be LEGENDARY!" but for what we got it was a real good roll in the hay.

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Lucha Azteca Workrate Report 11/30/13

These matches were from the 11/15 Arena Mexico show, so we're back to being just 2 weeks behind. Remember when Galavision was like 6-8 months behind?



1. Lightning Match: Titan vs. Bobby Zavala

Titan is pretty goofy but I guess a lightning match is about the best place to hide him. I'd rather have him doing bad matwork and "hold my hand while I walk on ropes" and handstand flippy spots in a match like this then muck up a decent trios with it. Bobby Zavala is also a goofball but in a different way. He was still able to standout by showing up his douchebag...charm? Charm doesn't seem like a good word for it. He's a rudo, and he's a complete douche. He wears his full body suit and comes out with a dorky spiky mask because I assume he thinks he looks cool but instead he kinda looks like some sort reptilian leather daddy. He's one of those new breed of luchadors who watch a lot of bad indy wrestling and then mimic it, so while Titan is doing goofy headstand backflip head scissors, Zavala is doing crappy things like death valley drivers into turnbuckles, or vertical suplex into turnbuckles. Basically, most moves into turnbuckles looks dangerous, stupid, and less impactful than just doing the move normally. It works better for him since he does act like a total douche, so he may as well have douchey offense. Zavala did do some cool things as well, like Titan leaping over the top to the floor (like the Silver King dive from the middle rope to the floor) and Zavala blasts him with a dropkick on the way down. This was mostly goofy, but still sorta fun.



2. Blue Panther, Atlantis & Diamante Azul vs. Felino, Mr. Niebla & Comandante Pierroth

Wow, this stunk.The first two falls were among the worst I can remember seeing from a match with competent workers. I've seen fairly recent Felino involved in a good match, but when he dogs it I don't think there's anybody who dogs it harder. Here he just gets in the way and can hardly be bothered to do anything when he's in the ring. Panther tries to work mat stuff with him and he just kinda lies there. Niebla was amusing in this but seemed to be more invested in yukking it up with the crowd instead of working the match. Azul seems pretty awful, too. Just because they dress him up like Blue Demon Jr. doesn't mean he has to wrestle down to that level. Comandante had some cool left uppercuts. That was about the best thing that happened here.



3. Negro Casas, Terrible & Tama Tonga vs. Rush, La Sombra & La Mascara

Who cares about that lousy Felino match when you get something like this!? This match is awesome and Rush/Casas completely ramp up the intensity and beat the shit out of each other the whole match. Arena Mexico loves Casas and Rush soaks up the hate, as he taunts them with fake soccer kicks and boots Casas in the balls. Both guys take turns dishing a beating, Rush kicks in Casas chest while he's slumped into the corner, Casas cashes his receipt on Rush's chin later on. Casas throws all his kicks really violently here, Rush had to have been hurting after. Casas throws all those awesome full extension kicks, catching Rush with knees, tons of great stuff. The other guys know their place and do fine complementary stuff. But they knew you were here to see Rush and Casas tear things down, and hung back. Go out of your way to watch this. It will have you salivating for the Rush/Casas singles.

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Lucha Azteca Workrate Report 11/23/13

This show both remained behind, and skipped ahead. The first match is from the 10/18/13 Arena Mexico show, the Casas match is from the 11/8/13 card.



1. Rush & La Mascara vs. Terrible & Tama Tonga

This gets tons of time, but doesn't really add up to anything great. Some nice individual stuff but they didn't make anything special out of the tag format, they just worked it like a CMLL main event trios (short two falls, longer third) but with 4 guys instead of 6. So it was just like a trios, but with two less guys doing cool things. Rush looked good against the two rudos, hit a couple big time dives. Tonga had some cool stuff like a neat missed cross body. Ending was a lame fake ball shot, but I do love that it came after Rush tried and failed to kick Terrible in the balls. Are the ever going to do a full rudo turn with Rush, or do they just like him as a pretty boy who can act like a total dick?


2. Negro Casas, Ultimo Guerrero & Euforia vs. Atlantis, La Sombra & Shocker

Fun match that was notable for being the insane bump show for Ultimo Guerrero. He started with his super high arcing Jerry bump which you can usually expect at a minimum, but then he kept going, taking a couple other big bumps to the floor, bumping a couple times on the floor, getting tossing over the barricade and landing nasty onto his shoulder, taking a really great looking Cassandro bump around the ringpost, tumbling spectacularly over the top to the floor on Atlantis's rolling surfboard spot (Rachel always gets a kick out of that). I don't know what made this match so important to act like a freak, but he did and it was awesome and I commend him for it. Casas looked like Casas and I loved a chop exchange he had with Shocker when instead of risking a hand injury on those mammoth moobs of Shocker he just opted for an eye poke. Remember when Shocker was the guy you'd buy CMLL shows to see? La Sombra's added bulk doesn't stop him from hitting a crazy dive over the turnbuckle to the floor, and Atlantis looked decent. Not a match you'll remember in a couple months, but well worth going out of your way to see UG bump around like he lost a bet.

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Lucha Azteca Workrate Report 11/16/13

This is cool as we jump back a couple weeks to the 10/11/13 Arena Mexico show, meaning we get another chapter in the Porky/Escorpion saga.




1. Valiente, Maximo & Super Porky vs. Comandante Pierroth, Ephesto & Rey Escorpion

Follow up to the first Porky potato fest (Porky's Revenge!) is just as fun as the first, with Escorpion hitting some nasty shots on Porky until Porky snaps with a single leg takedown and just wails on him like when Ralphie finally snapped and made Scut Farkus cry. The addition of Valiente here is nice and even though the match is clearly about Porky/Escorpion, Valiente still hits a boss tope (which was preceded by a fast Jerry bump by Ephesto) and Comandante Pierroth hits a mammoth senton. Maximo's brawling and punches from the mount took away from this a bit as he was whiffing by like 3 feet, but Porky is basically the most sympathetic babyface ever in this as he looks completely helpless. Escorpion throws so many huge bombs that it just made me want that Porky comeback even more. Judging by all the loud Porky chants, the crowd wanted it bad too. I'm loving this feud!



2. Lightning Match: Averno vs. Titan

All you can usually ask out of lightning matches is that the cool spots are cool, and this one had some cool big spots. Titan took some pretty nutty bumps here, including getting splattered on the floor after getting pulled off the apron by Averno, getting crotched in such a way that it looked like he damaged his knee and his balls, and then the coup de grace: Averno sidestepping a crazy fast suicide dive, throwing Titan right into the ring barrier. Averno gets the countout win and Titan may have died. Crazy spot.



3. Rush, Marco Corleone & La Sombra vs. Terrible, Rey Bucanero & Tama Tonga

Quick couple falls and a really fun third fall. Rush gets a nice extended run with Tonga and those two match up nicely, ending with Tonga getting blasted by a Rush seated dropkick in the corner. Terrible bumps all around for Corleone who does a lot of show off stuff with the abs. La Sombra is all bulky now and whiffs on a big flip dive that sees him faceplant the barricade. This is another one for the Rush fans, without tons else to recommend, but Rush is such a dynamic worker now that even seeing so-so matches with his involvement are fairly worthwhile.

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Catching Up On 2013 AAA

Gran Apache, Lucky Boy and Nino de Ebano vs. Atomic Boy, Flamita, and Jinzo, 4/13/13

I don't know much about anybody in this match not named Apache, although I thought (and was correct) that I've seen Atomic Boy before as a mini. The others are either Apache, Navarro, or Arkangel trainees. These kinds of spotfests aren't for everybody, but if they have minimal botches and don't act like wrestling is super serious business I'm kind of a sucker for them.

This one is a real hoot and everybody in it gets a chance to do their thing. Lucky Boy and Nino de Ebano take some big bumps and bust out a couple dangerous dives (one does a springboard swanton and barely rotates before landing). Jinzo looks like a throwback Pena young boy but works like a pretty convincing bully. They all get to do all sorts of goofy 5 man submissions, which is when the awesome glue of the match - Gran Apache - does everything you want him to do: punch slap and kick pretty boys and skinny masked weenies. All the spots were fun  but all of them were capped off great by an old man interrupting them to slap them senseless. From kicking Jinzo in the temple with the toe of his boot, to his great running punch in the corner, to watching all the goofy submissions, mugging to the crowd before smacking everybody in said goofy submissions, and then even bleeding, Apache was the (not at all shocking) star in this. Real fun way to kill 15 minutes.

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Catching Up On 2013 AAA

Canek vs. El Mesias vs. LA Park, 3/17/13

So I used to be more in tune with AAA when it was shown on Galavision, but have fallen out of it more in the last year plus. I figured it would do me some good to go through some recommended matches from the promotion's past year. Park vs. Mesias was probably my favorite match anywhere in 2011, so those two turning up in a match instantly makes me interested. So I'm going into this one wanting more craziness from those two, while also hoping Canek stays out of the way. But I mean the guy is as old as my dad so even if he just takes an inside cradle bump normally I'll still be fairly impressed.

Park really admirably bumps around for Canek arm drags and kicks and "throws", which must be the same kind of difficulty that actors go through when working in front of a green screen. Park bumping for a non-existent arm drag and then rolling himself into a gogolplata seems at least as difficult as expressing genuine fear for a tennis ball on a stick that will eventually be a snarling monster. But Canek is gone fairly early into this, with Park and Mesias stiffing each other up in between. Park makes some chair shots to Canek's neck look really great.

And the moment Canek is gone we go right to the crazy Park/Mesias singles match we all wanted, and holy shit is it awesome. Mesias hits a gorgeous headscissors off the top, Park misses a charge into the corner and practically goes the full Cassandro with it, and after rolling to the floor Mesias hits one of the most insane dives I have ever seen. He gets tons of speed and flies into Park while totally vertical while almost flying into the 3rd row neck first. Good lord. Back in and Mesias takes a reckless Park spin kick off the top, and after rolling to the floor Park blasts him with the Daniel Bryan flying knee off the apron. Each guy tries to out stupid bump the other, with Park possibly one-upping Mesias' dive by taking some sort of top rope chestbreaker, only taking it head first. Both guys end up standing on the top rope dueling for control, and it ends up in some sort of lunatic Spanish Fly with both guys flying off the top and landing in the ring in ways neither intended to land.

This match was a sloppy glorious mess. Not an all time classic like their first match, but both guys did and took so much nutty stuff in it that it rose above the slop and came off like two guys putting everything on the line.

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Uprising: Lucha Libre Workrate Report 9/29/13

So this was from a fairly recent show, happening in May 2013. Which means we jumped from airing 4+ year old matches on up to present day. We're never going to see those missing 4 years of matches, are we? Still that actually gives me hope that Santo's 2013 appearance from the same show eventually turns up on this show.

1. Persian Prince vs. Pistolero

I know Pistolero is a PWR trainee (there's a cringe-y statement from him on the Pro Wrestling Revolution site that seems written by the owner of PWR, talking about how they were a great place to train, but with a bunch of petty thinly-veiled digs thrown in at APW, who I think started training him before he moved on to be trained at PWR. He even calls them "that school up north" which tickles me to no end) and I know nothing about Persian Prince (I could not locate any internet flame war letters that he wrote). Match seemed kind of built to showcase Pistolero, and I dug what I saw. Nothing flashy but I don't believe he's been working for long. He had nice elbows and forearm strikes, took a big bump off a reversed bulldog, and did a cool deadlifty German suplex. Couldn't get much of a read on Prince, but he did ragdoll and fold up nicely for the German suplex. Match ends suddenly and flatly on Prince's first offensive move, a flying shoulderblock with some wonky timing. Something seemed off and Pistolero landed funny taking it, then they just went to the pin. Crowd seemed confused. I seemed confused. Rewound to see what happened, still couldn't really tell. Prince threw a shoulder block, Pistolero bumped kinda fast and awkwardly, match ended.

2. Pequeno Halloween vs. Octagoncito

On paper this was one of the more exciting matches I've seen on a PWR card. And the match delivered and would have been killer live. We get 4 minutes of cool matwork stuff that is kind of exhibition-y, not so much mat struggle as "here's some cool stuff we can do" but that doesn't really matter here. Halloween busts out plenty of cool intricate twisty submissions where he has 3 limbs tied up all at once with all of them doing different things, and Octagoncito has some cool roll ups to get out of them. It builds really nicely to maximize the crowd getting into it, leaping into a couple of really hot dives and big bumps from both guys. Cool spot where Octagoncito tries something from the apron but Halloween hits a drop toe hold, then dropkicks him to the floor and follows up with the Halloween face first slide bump but does this one as a splash on Octagoncito. The match was as good as I hoped it would be. Aside from a couple flubbed headscissor spots everything looked cool, and Pequeno Halloween still looks just as good as he did when he was making tape more regularly in 2007-2009 (when I thought he and Pequeno Damien and Bam Bam were three of the best workers in the world). Pretty impressive that he's kept his work up to that level while working as a freelancer. I just wish he showed up more often.

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Watch This Lucha!

Rey Escorpion/Dragon Rojo Jr./Polvora vs. Super Porky/Stuka Jr./Maximo, 10/4/13

Phil left me a voice mail at work telling me that this trios match was 10 minutes long, and there weren't many better uses of 10 minutes than this. He was right. I've been a fan of Porky since I watched lucha and probably overrate most of his 2000s stuff because of my Brazos fandom and my overall love of fatties in wrestling (this blog could probably be called "Fatties in Wrestling" and 60% of the posts would fit with the title). Porky's been involved in good stuff over the last decade, but this was easily the best work he's done since the March 2003 miracle 8 man which saw him and Gran Markus Jr. clearly winning some sort of bet by showing everybody backstage that they could still outshine everybody (with Porky running all over the place and even hitting that weird leg flip/arm drag thing that guys Juventud size usually hit, and Markus hitting an unreal unassisted rana).

This match starts off with Escorpion (who's quietly turned the corner from really good to excellent worker over the last year) ambushing Porky, grabbing Porky's crotch-wiping towel and wrapping it around Porky's head and throat, then throwing nasty potato shots through the towel. It looked like something Vic Mackey would do to force a confession while also trying to prevent visible bruising. The beating continues to almost uncomfortable levels with Escorpion dishing out nasty punches to the face and body, biting him, and then when Porky finally drops Escorpion starts dealing some furious knees to Porky's head, all while Porky's head is trapped between ring barrier and knee. With his build and height and mustache it looked like a criminal finally caught up to Hercule Poirot and dealt him some street justice.

Porky's sympathy is great here as usually when he's on the mat his teammates need to lift him back to his feet due to his fatness. Here when he reached out his arms to be lifted up his face looked like it was because he was unsure whether or not he could stay standing. The other four guys are all in their as background noise but all serve their roles well. Maximo continues being his underrated self and the dive he hits at the end to take out Rojo was beautiful. Polvora's high speed Cassandro bump to take himself out was lunacy. And it all built to Escorpion being left alone in the ring for a very pissed off Porky, who immediately starts dealing the nastiest left hands he's thrown in years, punching Escorpion silly until he just plants him with a belly to belly (I don't remember the last time I even remember him throwing a suplex) for the win. But it doesn't stop there as Porky exacts revenge by punching a prone-on-the-mat Escorpion over and over to the face and throat, having to be pulled off by teammates, and then kicking him in the ribs while Escorpion is still down.

This was short, got over all the story it needed to, and I cannot wait to see all the follow-up matches.

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CMLL on Fox Deportes Workrate Report, 3/1/13

These were the other matches from the 2/15 Arena Mexico show. And like almost every lucha show that I've randomly discovered on my cable, this channel stopped showing CMLL like a couple weeks after this. I don't know why Mexican cable teases me so, but whenever a channel other than Galavision starts showing lucha, it usually just disappears after a couple months. This time it continued to appear on the schedule, and it would record as "Lucha Libre CMLL", but then I'd watch it and it would be an old UFC show from 5 years ago.

1. Amapola/La Comandante/La Seductora vs. Estrellita/Dalis/Silueta

Boy when Silueta is making TV you know you're really digging deep on some women's matches. Amapola blindsides Estrellita during her ring entrance to at least save us all from that sadness. And that's kinda the story of the match. Amapola and Estrellita match up well and work pretty violently with each other but good lord this felt pretty long for what it was. Dalis and Silueta are what they are, Comandante is usually fine as the 3rd best ruda in a trios, and Seductora doesn't do much for me (although I admittedly have hardly ever seen her).  The dive/plancha spot was OK but pretty sloppy, and Estrellita's finisher Indian death lock/armbar was really cool, but took longer than Undertaker's triangle to set up.

2013 Reyes Del Aire Final! 

2. Volador Jr. vs. La Sombra

Holllllllly shit that match was AWESOME! I was excited for it and this was WAY better than I thought it would be. Volador has been one of my favorite wrestlers period over the last couple years and he did not disappoint here. La Sombra was MORE than game and this was an absolutely insane match with some crazy spots. I loved it. You like headscissor hurricanranas? Well I sure do, motherfucker, and there were tons of them on display here. Each of them gorgeous, each of them in a different part of the building: in the ring, on the floor, on the ramp way, into the barricade, tons of ranas and all of them awesome. Volador sending Sombra upside down into the ring barrier. The dives were plentiful and also nuts, with Sombra doing a hands-free flip dive over the ring post and Volador returning the favor with a nutso swanton to the floor. And when you had so many ranas, you know you're gonna get guys getting caught in ranas and planted with powerbombs and motherfucker we had some of that too and it was glorious! Sombra had a couple ridiculous suplex spots, with him going for a schoolboy, rolling through and doing a Backlund-esque one arm dead lift overhead suplex. Later in the match he goes for a wheelbarrow suplex with Volador grabbing his mini sidekick to prevent it, so Sombra ends up heaving both of them overhead and they all sprawl out fantastically across the ring. Everything about this was fucking awesome with Volador stiffing Sombra with kicks, Volador flying all over the place at fast speeds making Sombra shine, a double mask pull-off finish, shit even Tirantes bumps big after getting a dropkick run into his face. I loved it all and this was just truly great. DEFINITELY go out of your way to watch this. You will not regret spending 20 minutes of your life on this. 

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CMLL on Galavision Workrate Report 2/23/13

These matches were from the 2/15/13 Arena Mexico show.




1. Lightning Match: Dragon Rojo Jr. vs. El Hijo del Fantasma

Lightning matches are pretty hard to judge as I don't believe I've ever seen one with much structure, unless "offense exhibition" counts as a type of structure. Judging selling and build and pace in a lightning match seems like a fool's errand, as none of the wrestlers are trying to do any of those things. They're just trying to do their coolest looking moves in as short amount of time as possible. The absolute best luchadors all try and work a show-off style in these matches, so they're kind of odd in that really great workers like Virus essentially work like Delta. So with all that in mind, this was one of the better lightning matches I've seen. The big spots were big, the other spots were hit cleanly. Rojo seemed a little selfish in this one as he very clearly had a Kurt Angle "waiting to get my shit in" look on his face (well...what's visible of his face). Fantasma hit a great tope that smashes Rojo into the barrier, but he sells it by fixing his hair. Oooookay. But then he hits an insane running dropkick from the rampway to the floor and who gives a shit how he sold a tope. Finish looks awesome as Fantasma goes for a rana, Rojo catches him, bounces him super high off the top rope and into a massive powerbomb.



2. Namajague/Averno/Mephisto vs. Valiente/Stuka Jr./Angel de Oro

1st fall is an extended rudo beatdown, as Okumura comes out dressed up as Namajague so that the REAL Namajague can ambush those sucker tecnicos. Namajague beats down Stuka the whole time, ripping at his mask and throwing stiff clotheslines while Averno is awesome on the ring apron riling up all the Arena fans. Oro wants to throw a beating on Averno but Averno stands with his head down and hands behind his back and Oro is too honorable and then Mephisto just blindsides him. Mephisto finishes this with an absolutely brutal Pepsi Plunge, with him holding Valiente up on the middle rope for a crazy amount of time before planting him. Rudo beatdown continues most of the way through the 2nd, making the tecnico comeback all the more satisfying. It was also satisfying because all three rudos are guys who know how to fly around for tecnico offense. Stuka hits a nice tope that sends Namajague flying into the barrier, Oro hits a nice moonsault from the 2nd rope, and Valiente hits his insane Valiente Special at crazy speeds, nailing that moonsault from the top to the floor. Back in and Namajague gets a kick caught and Stuka throws him down into the splits, misses the running knee and Namajague punches him in the balls to get a straight falls rudo win. Match wasn't much as it was all about setting up the mask/hair match, but it was fine for what it was and SOME indy dude needs to steal the "catch kick->pull opponent into doing splits->knee opponent in the face" move chain. Seems like something that would have already been done in Beyond Wrestling.



3. Ultimo Guerrero/Niebla Roja/Euforia vs. Atlantis/La Mascara/Super Porky

Again more of an angle than an actual match, setting up the Atlantis/UG mask match which should be amazing. It feels like I haven't seen Porky on TV in months, maybe over a year. He seems more immobile than the last time I saw him, but still manages to do his trademark spots (headlock/headscissor takeover, big splash off the top with assist from his team, giant running butt splash to all three rudos), it just takes him way longer to get to his feet afterwards. Roja looks really good here, being a total shit disturber while UG bumps around like a lunatic. Nothing stands out as being spectacular, but it passed the time.

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2013 Lucha Roundup

Chico Che/Saruman/Freelance v. Eita/Tomahawk/Imposible IWRG 3/21

Pretty mediocre match. The DG guys didn't do anything as bad as they have in previous matches, but this was a really subdued Freelance and Che performance. No real crazy dives, Che threw some nice headbutts but didn't fly around or anything. More forgettable then bad, but pretty forgettable.

El Hijo Del Santo v. Oliver John TXT 4/7

Great to see a Santo singles match show up. Haven't had much of an opinion of John before but he definitely worked hard here, he took some big bumps including doing a diving headbutt directly into Santo's feet and flying to the floor. I also really liked his piledriver counter. Santo did cool Santo things, headscissors, headbutts, mat counters, topes. Built to a pretty exciting finish run and a satisfying finish. Very good match better then I was expecting

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CMLL on Fox Deportes Workrate Report 2/17/13

1. Sensei/Oro Jr. vs. Super Comando/Artillero

I always get stoked when Sensei makes TV, and I don't believe I've ever seen Oro Jr. before. Artillero and Comando easily go under the radar as they only work openers, but usually they look pretty decent. HERE,  however, they look downright AWESOME. This was probably my absolute favorite performance by the two brothers. They were just shit kicking, smack talking jerks here. They also got to shine offensively more than usual. Comando hit a beastly missile dropkick that sent Oro sprawling, and Arti got to work a bunch of real cool wrist/arm work on Oro that likely wouldn't have been shown on Galavision. Sensei gets to do cool stuff (love his triangle rana) and love this as the coming out party for Comando/Arti. They are now officially guys I look forward to.



2. The OTHER Reyes Del Aire semifinal!!

Volador Jr vs. Virus vs. Valiente vs. Psicosis vs. Mascara Dorada vs. Guerrero Maya Jr. vs. Maximo vs. Sangre Azteca vs. Mephisto vs. Rey Escorpion vs. Angel de Oro vs. Diamante vs. Niebla Roja vs. Puma vs. Triton vs. Fuego

Yeahhhhh buddy. Really looking forward to this as I think my boys Volador and Virus and Valiente can shine in this type of setting. I think on paper this Cibernetico looks stronger than the other one. And there is some awesome shit at the start of this. Psicosis takes a nutty Fuerza bump, Valiente hits an amazing bullet tope that sends Escorpion into the crowd, Maximo hits a gorgeous rana on Virus, and this is just a blast. Sangre Azteca is a guy who more people should talk about as being awesome, because he is. He doesn't get a long run here but he shines BRIGHT. You know that spot where guys drop to their tummy when an opponent is running the ropes to trip him up, but usually it just looks like going through spots as the guy drops down immediately? Well Sangre actually slides into Angel de Oro  , MAKING Oro jump over him or else he actually would have tripped. It's that extra mile. He gets eliminated by Valiente but goes out looking killer, taking two massive monkey flips into the ropes (like Eddy used to!) and shit that guy is good. But then holy shit Guerrero Maya does a flip tope that sends him flying into the 2nd row and YES that guy is awesome. I'm loving this.

Eliminations start flying fast and Maximo hits a wicked tope with no wussy hands to shield the blow, just face into face, arms at his side. Brutal. Volador and Valiente have a hot segment like you knew they would. And okay why is everybody doing a goofy "powerbomb a guy onto my own knees" spot. Three different guys have now done this same spot in the last 2 minutes. Admittedly Volador may be the guy who brought backcracker offense into Mexico and he seems to be amongst the biggest offenders, but fuck it. He does all that stuff with such speed and snap that I don't give a damn if it's all played out. As with all these matches, they do their thing until the finishes start happening, and then there's a pinfall every 45 seconds. But this was consistently awesome and I would highly recommend checking it out. All the guys seemed to be treating it like a really big deal and this was definitely better than the other one. Tons of awesome stuff.

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CMLL on Galavision Workrate Report 2/16/13

These matches originally happened on the 2/8/13 Arena Mexico show.

1. Demus 3:16/Pequeno Violencia//Pequeno Olimpico vs. Bam Bam/Fantasy/Astral

Hey! A TV appearance from Fantasy! Demus vs. Bam Bam is one of the modern great lucha match-ups, so I always get excited when they're opposite each other. Demus' charisma is a cut above the rest of the minis division and it's a shame he didn't get to become a real boy the other year. Match is good junk food. No substance but goes down pleasantly. Fantasy is always good for some fun (his springboard moonsault while his opponent is hung up in the ropes is pretty nutty), Astral at least finally works with a shirt on to spare me from his topographical back, Bam Bam crashes and burns pretty spectacularly (though not as good as Demus), and the ending made me jump forward in my chair. Demus has Bam Bam up in a muscle buster, parades him around the ring, and Bam Bam wriggles free and drops straight down, catching Demus legs at the last minute and rolling him up. Sounds normal, but the way it looked flipped me out. Bam Bam just sheer vertical dropped, head straight down, and tucked at the very last minute possible. I thought he was just going to get spiked and die. Dude is crazy.


2. Namajague/Misterioso Jr./Okumura vs. Rey Cometa/Stuka Jr./Hijo Del Fantasma

Short but really fun match to build up to the eventual hair/mask match. Namajague is his awesome self here, blowing mist and ripping Stuka's mask, throwing nasty back elbows and taking a massive monkey flip bump on the rampway. Fantasma hits his really cool running ramp-to-ring clothesline and a massive flip dive. Cometa gets spectacularly bullied by Misterioso and does his great flip bump off a stiff clothesline. Misterioso beats him up good and it all builds to some beautiful ranas and the tornillo you want to see. Okumura looked great here, too working his low-rent SUWA/Dinamitas style. I dig all these guys.



3. Ultimo Guerrero/Terrible/Tiger vs. Atlantis/Rush/Shocker

This was alright but also was used to build up the UG/Atlantis mask match, which is a MASSIVE mask match right there. The UG resurgence these past couple years has been really awesome. He's a guy who was one of my absolute favorites in 2000-2001, and my the middle of the decade he kinda personified all my least favorite parts of lucha. So it's nice to see him so energized and awesome again. Speaking of guys who were amongst my favorites 12 years ago, Shocker looks soooo sloooow these days. He looks to be getting in better shape than last year, but he still tries to do all his old spots, just so much slower. Terrible is fun here slapping around Rush and I know I'm way down to see UG and Atlantis tear it up. UG levels him at one point in the match with a brutal baseball slide dropkick (basically did a Fuerza bump dropkick) that sent Atlantis flying. Best "through the ropes" dropkick since the Owen Hart/1-2-3 Kid KOTR match. I'm game for two dudes in their 40s bleeding and dying for their masks.

Also was I napping or did CMLL rock una caida matches this week?

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2013 Lucha Roundup

Hair/Mask vs. Hair Mask!

Namajague/Shiego Okumura vs. Rey Cometa/Stuka Jr. 3/15

ER: So I had been pestering Phil about checking out some Namajague as he's consistently been my favorite "new" wrestler. I mean there have been other discoveries over the past couple years. Terry Rudge has been a recent obsession, but that stuff is also 30 years old. All of my other current favorite guys (Mark Henry, Arkangel, etc.) have been my favorites for quite some time. Namajague is a new guy in that sense, that I have an actual modern wrestler who I can add to my list of people to scour youtube for. So I've been building him up to Phil as completely insane and awesome, and I've been on a semi-roll recommending stuff to Phil lately (everybody needs to listen to the new Autre Ne Veut album. Concert of the year, hottest 1994 R&B jamz ever.) so we both dove into this one without having seen it prior.

And it delivered beyond the degree that I was expecting it to deliver. CMLL Arena Mexico main event style kinda blows. You know that. I know that. It's a dead horse. Any matches that work are usually in spite of the style. But whatever this works and it's really fun. Namajague looks awesome in it, bumping like mad all over the place and throwing stiff clotheslines. Cometa does a bunch of insane and spectacular stuff, spins around a bunch really quick, takes an amazing flip bump off a clothesline, etc. Okumura splats him into the floor with a giant cross body, and Namajague gets buried into the wall by a bullet tope. There's plenty of stuff that makes this work so it's kinda pointless for me to gripe about what I would have wanted instead. I got dumb bumps, crazy spots, and Okumura looking even more like SUWA with his head shaved.

PS: Solid entertaining match in a style I am ambivalent towards. Cometa has some really crazy dives, I remember losing my shit the first time I saw Hector Garza do a tornillo and Cometa spins around like an Ice Capader. Stuka wasn't much here, but the rudo team was pretty great, I am in on Namajague although I am bummed he lost his awesome mask, there was a weird spot where he eats a shining wizard by doing the splits which felt like something Eric Corvis and the card trick guy should steal for Beyond wrestling. Okumura broke out an awesome brainbuster and awkward awesome plancha, he was working like a guy losing his hair Wanted another kick out or two, and there was some slow spots in the Segunda but this was good stuff

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