Tuesday is French Catch Day: Primitiv! Frederico! Cohen! Tejero! Angelito! Gordon! Piranhas!

Le Primitiv vs Eliot Frederico 7/18/84

SR: Mombo Le Primitif is among the most surreal things I've ever seen in wrestling. It looks like he got lost on his way to fighting Survival Tobita. OJ didn't even mentioned that they subtitled some of the wrestling moves in that match like it was a comic book. E.g. Mombo would do a kneedrop to the arm and it would display CRAAAAACK! on the screen, or ONK! when he got thrown outside. The guy playing Mombo seemed like a capable wrestler but had no idea how to portray this character. He did all kinds of shit, like a plancha or cartwheeling on the ropes. The crowd has no idea what to make of this and treats Frederico as a de facto face. Frederico actually throws some really nice punches here and I want to see him in a match that wasn‘t a confusing mess.

MD: Let's start with the basic facts. Primitiv was in a monkey suit of sorts. He had tribal drummers with him. They played the whole match and chanted "Mombo". Frederico was "the Rocky of the Ring" with a combo boxer gimmick and leather guy gimmick. This was pretty wild stuff. Narratively, Le Primitiv was able to control the arm early, wildly tossing him around the ring. He had some fun stuff in slamming it over the top rope or whipping him into the corner but somehow hanging on to the arm at the same time. Whenever Frederico was able to knock him out of the ring with a punch or a dropkick, he just bounded right back in like he was Brody or something. Big bump, no sell. Eventually, though, Frederico really got him with a back body drop to the floor and he didn't bounce right back in. Primitiv responded animalistically by leaping to the top and trying to cartwheel off the ropes but kept getting caught by Frederico. So things were going well until Primitiv got him out and crushed him with a dive we barely got to see and just pounded him into the seats. After that, it was basically over. He tried to do a top rope legdrop and it ended up more of a stomp and he did a standing one instead. I'm giving all of this way too much credit but it was still pretty compelling. The crazy gimmicks were almost all super athletic in one way or another and this was no exception. Wasn't as offputting as a La Bete Humaine match but it was still pretty out there. And like Sebastian says, they kept flashing words like "AUGH!" on the screen after spots. Or "SPLAT!" and Batman wasn't even in this one.

Georges Cohen vs Anton Tejero 7/18/94

SR: Fun little match that was basically a showcase for the tricks Cohen still had up in his sleeve, and the fact that even old as dirt Anton Tejero was still a bump freak. Tejero got in maybe 1 minute of offense which makes this pretty much a squash though.

MD: Thirteen minutes of pure entertainment. I'm not sure I'd call this a squash necessarily, so much as an exhibition of Cohen's counter-wrestling. Tejero was the aggressor the whole way through. It's just that Cohen had an answer for literally everything he tried except for that one minute where he was flexing his weight and tossing him about. Even then, the answer was to pull him out of the ring, beat him around the ring as he scrambled back, head back in and beat him. Both of these guys were absolute masters. Tejero was an amazing base, stooge, heavy, and maybe the best bumper-out-of-the-ring in history. They fit so many different spots and exchanges and sequences into every minute of this. They're getting up there but they can still go so fast and wrestle so smooth and bump so big. There was no drama here but everything made sense and had weight and skill to it and the crowd was happy for every second.

Flesh Gordon/Angelito vs Piranhas 3/30/84 or 7/18/84

MD: This was a fun one. The Piranhas were Sleestak looking guys with "tails" around their necks. They'd take them off and use them to choke, leading to an early first fall win as one held Angelito down and the other splashed him off the turnbuckles. One of them was a top notch clubberer and they weren't afraid to bump around the ring and take all of the stylists stuff. Gordon doesn't seem quite as slick and smooth as he was a couple of years earlier but he still does most of the spots expected of him and had a great dropkick. There was a hot tag towards the end of the last fall and he really did a great job cleaning with uppercuts, Bordes' jumping knees, and even Drapp's shoulder shrug attack. Angelito took it even further, using all of the greatest hits of the last thirty years of Catch. He hit the up and over into an armbar out of a top wristlock, had Batman's floatover headlock escape, really just all the stuff. The crowd was feeling this too, with rare chants for a public warning after a pin got broken up (after Gordon's cool flying twisting mare finisher), one fan trying to interfere as the ref was distracted, and fans slamming the mat pissed off after the stylists got DQed for using the Piranhas' rope things against them.

SR: Really entertaining cross between Catch and Monterrey. Angelito looked pretty fantastic here working as a technico. He may have been one of the better lightweights still going in Europe at this point, at least when it comes to athleticism. Gordon wasn‘t half bad here either. The Piranhas won‘t exactly set your world on fire (I think they may have been played by the same guys as Les Maniaks) but they are good enough bases here. They had this amusing shtick where they would use a piece of their attire as a foreign object. Also, the announcer kept calling them „The little fishes“ and you have to love that. Match also had good structure with the rudos taking a pinfall early to increase pressure on the technicos,