On Brand Segunda Caida: Barry Houston

Barry Houston/Todd Morton vs. Terry Funk/Bunkhouse Buck WCW Saturday Night 7/16/94

ER: This was such an incredible idea that I'm quite frankly an idiot for not writing about something like this sooner. This is a pretty spectacular "What if Segunda Caida booked a random WCW tag match" lineup right here. And this is one of the greatest Barry Houston showcases we have, a long tag match that is essentially an extended Barry Houston beatdown with some nice comebacks. Todd Morton is in only for about one minute, still working his Ricky Morton underling look with his Morton mullet and bandana boots. Morton comes in, takes a couple shots from Buck, takes a great backdrop bump because that's what he does (this one doesn't have his usual height, but it takes a flipping bump the way Jannetty takes a clothesline and it's amazing, never seen a guy take a backdrop like this before), and then eats a nasty Funk piledriver. That's all we see of Morton. The rest of this tag match is Buck and Funk destroying Houston. Houston was just so damn good at eating a beating, he relegated himself to a career of eating a beating. He gets a couple fun mini comebacks, the rolling prawn hold was a solid nearfall, but it's so much of Funk and Buck just manhandling him. 

The whole thing starts with him eating a lariat right in the back of the head and goes downhill from there. Buck and Terry are so damn mean here, Funk just tosses him around and his a hard bodyslam, Bunk slams him and stomps his head, Houston takes two huge back bumps from the ring to the floor (landing with a real slap), Funk and Buck hit loud chops and slaps, Funk hits a hard shoulderblock, freaking powerbombs Houston on the floor AND gives Houston a nasty DDT on the floor....it's a freaking massacre. The finish of this is bananas: Funk drops True Man Barry Houston with THREE straight piledrivers. And Barry Houston takes a piledriver as well as ANY man who has ever taken a piledriver; Houston always whips his legs and knees towards the mat instead of keeping his body stiff like most. It really creates the illusion that his neck is snapping, just looks absolutely stomach turning. It's the perfect example of how his gift is his biggest curse: Picture Terry Funk voice saying "Barry - I like that name, sounds like my name - Barry, I remember how well you can take a piledriver. Tonight you're gonna help us out by taking three of 'em." Each one looks better than the last, and this video has a whole highlight reel after the match showing Houston taking 8 different nasty bumps. This is the match that secures Barry Houston a place in the eventual Segunda Caida Hall of Fame.

Barry Houston vs. Steve Austin WCW Worldwide 8/6/94

ER: Man this was a savage beating. Whereas the Funk/Buck tag was a total asskicking that saw Houston get a couple nice comebacks, this was 3 minutes of Austin showing just why he's an all timer. Houston gets not one split second of any kind of offense against Austin, this is just a freaking bear attack. Houston barely got a chance to breathe throughout this as Austin just fired on him the entire time. Austin backed Houston into a corner and threw a fantastic right hand to the jaw and an elbow that really used his whole body. Really every single thing Austin did in this match was with his whole body, looked like he was throwing all of his weight behind every shot. It was 3 minutes of Austin just being the meanest bully, doing everything so explosively. He drops a great knee, throws great body shots, and then does some of the meanest legwork I've seen. He spends the last 2 minutes just yanking and stomping and doing incredible butt drops on the inside of Houston's knee. The amazing thing was all of Austin's attacked looked completely worked, it didn't look like he was just stiffing the shit out of Houston, but I don't think it's possible for anybody to throw worked shots that look better than any of Austin's here. The leg work was great, every shot to the inner knee was brutal, and the stump puller figure 4 that he finished with was disgusting. God bless Houston and all he's done, but my god was this the Stunning Steve Austin show. This man was never not a star.