FUTEN is For The Children, We Teach The Children. Puffy is good but FUTEN is the Best-Futen 11/24/10

Ryuji Hijikata v. Kazuki Okubo

These are two of more pedestrian FUTEN guys, and we got a solid if unmemorable undercard FUTEN match. We got some nice looking grappling, some stiff, but not FUTEN stiff kicks. Hijikata is a guy I remember enjoying in BattlArts, but he was kind of juniory with some kind of goofy no selling. They slapped each other for a while and Hijikata hit a suplex and a choke.

Mitsuya Nagai v. Madoka

Madoka is a Beiber haired hairless junior who has irritated me in previous FUTEN shows, Nagai is an ex-RINGS crowbar who almost killed Iziuka a decade ago. This was Nagai cracking the fuck out of Madoka which is exactly how it should be. Madoka didn't bug me that much here, and I actively liked how he sold Nagai's kicks. Finish felt a little flat as it felt they were building to something bigger.

Daisuke Ikeda v. Manabu Suruga

Just a brutal mauling, Ikeda is a threshing machine in this match, by the end of it Suruga's face looked like domestic abuse victim. Surgura was great in this, he was completely overwhelmed and brutalized, but he wanted to go out on his sword. He was winging bombs but in a really desperate frantic way. He hits about a third of them, although he lands some thudders including a couple of square hooks right to Ikeda's jaw, and a Reggie Roby punt which has Ikeda checking his jaw. Still it just temporarily slowed down Ikeda who was Vorheesian, the final beating was uncomfortable to watch. Ikeda is on top of Manabu landing square right hands right to his forehead and nose. At one point Suruga is lying on the mat clawing at Ikeda's leg like Connie Corleone when Carlo got mad. I am not sure if it is an EPIC match, but it is an EPIC spectacle.

Takeshi Ono v. Katsumi Usuda

Ono's amazing 2010 just keeps on rolling. This is our first taste of BattlArts guys returning to FUTEN, it has been a while, but this certainly not the first time Usuda and Ono have tangled and it is great to watch them do a dance. Really awesome workrate match, which had the intensity and pace of a Bantamweight MMA fight. Both guys knew the counters to each guys counter, and they were scrambling for holds and winging shots. It is hard to pull off this kind of back and forth shootstyle without it seeming like some bullshit NOAH juniors match, but these guys did it. The matwork was awesome, feeling like Benzedrine Fujiwara. Usuda was pulling out some sick counters, including a crazy reverse figure four, and Ono wasn't as slick, but in more of a frenzy. Finish was awesome with Ono missing a kick, Usuda grabbing a wastelock, and Ono just spinning around into an Octopus which he took to the ground and pulled Usuda apart like a crab leg. Total blast, everything you would want from this match, maybe the FUTEN singles of the year.

Kengo Mashimo v. Makoto Hashi

A solid back and forth main event between two good wrestlers, but doesn't having the sickening violence or breathtaking technique of previous two matches. Mashimo focuses on landing kicks, and lands some nice ones, while Hashi works headbutts and backfists. There are some crackers, but nothing at the level of Nowitski specials Hashi has thrown in other FUTEN matches. Pretty much houseshow FUTEN, I enjoyed it fine, but even after watching it a couple of times it didn't do anything to stand out.

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Saturday Night's Alright for SLL's All-Request

Domingo Robles vs. Jay Youngblood (WWC, early 80's)
Requested by Tim Evans

This was a fun four-minute aside. Domingo Robles' gimmick is that he's what every clueless dope who read the WKO 100 without actually knowing what they were talking about thinks Black Terry is. He's this aged, broken down, clumsy, ambiguously drunken rudo who feebly attempts to brawl with Youngblood, but inevitably ends up getting knocked on his ass and begging off. And it rules. Robles' shtick is great. He has a million different ways to comically oversell Jay's offense. I think my favorite was when Youngblood hit him so hard that he got "stuck". This is compounded by Rip Rogers' solo commentary, as he is in awe at Robles' ludicrousness, and is actively cracking up at several points. "If at first you don't succeed...give up, Domingo."

Chris Jericho vs. Mike Enos (WCW, 9/23/1996)
Requested by DylanWaco

Enos' theme music epicness-to-push ratio is one of the mostly weirdly disproportionate I've ever seen. Dylan said this was his favorite Nitro match ever, and it's not hard to see the appeal. They do a really fun big man vs. little man match, and communicate the idea really well considering the size difference isn't that big and Enos has a lot of athletic offense for a biggish guy. Enos also comes across as a real challenge for Jericho despite the fact that I don't remember him getting one meaningful win in this entire run with the company and I'm watching from an age where Jericho is a multiple-time world champion (though he had only actually been in WCW a month at this point). Again, not hard to see why. Having not watched his stuff for a while, I had forgotten what a brute Enos could be. He opens this match by slapping Jericho hard across the mouth - seemingly because Jericho had an insufficiently firm handshake - and then cracks him with a headbutt. Jericho fires back with a nice spinwheel kick, but Enos hangs tight and catches Jericho with a slingshot shoulderblock and pins him down with the topes de Jalisco of all things. He spends the next little while beating Jericho up and powering him around. There's a particularly cool run outside the ring where Enos hits an apron dive clothesline and then turns the ringsteps on their side and suplexes Jericho onto them. After that, he turns his focus to Jericho's back. At one point, he breaks out a Boston crab that Larry Zbyszko completely shits on on commentary. Admittedly, it's not a very good Boston crab, but that's not the kind of thing you draw attention to in the booth. God, I hated Larry's commentary. Jericho escapes an Argentine backbreaker and hits a Michaels-style superkick followed by an Adams-style superkick to make a comeback, but it gets cut short in spectacular fashion when Enos turns a top-rope hurricanrana into a superbomb for a nearfall. When that doesn't work, he makes one last run at putting Jericho away, but Jericho over-rotates him on a powerslam attempt and lands on top for the pin. Offhand, I don't know what my favorite Nitro match ever is (Eddy/Malenko from the Saturday Nitro? I haven't watched it in a while. Hmmmm....). It's probably not this, but this was definitely one of the good ones, and a fine example of what used to make that show fun.

Kengo Mashimo & Madoka vs. Daisuke Sekimoto & Yoshihito Sasaki (Z-1, 3/2/2008)
Requested by Brandon-E

BJW guys vs. K-Dojo guys in Zero-One? OK. It's not like Zero-One has an identity of it's own anymore. These are three guys who I currently like, plus Madoka, who I don't really have anything against, back in a time when I either didn't like them or didn't care about them. Actually, weren't those fun MEN's Club multi-mans happening around this time? I probably liked Madoka the most when this happened. Either way, a lot has changed since then, but I guess the more things change, the more they stay the same, because these guys' performances in this match ranks roughly the same as how much I like them currently: Mashimo gives the best showing, then Sasaki, then Sekimoto, then Madoka. And that's not good, because Sekimoto vs. Madoka seems to be the main focus of much of the match, and Mashimo doesn't really even show up until the half-way point. The result is that we have the tale of two matches. The first half, dominated by Sekimoto/Madoka exchanges, is really listless and sloppy. At one point, in rapid succession, Sekimoto backdrops Madoka over the top rope onto the apron (which is blown completely), Madoka Rocker Drops him when he tries a shoulderblock through the ropes (which Sekimoto didn't even seem to be trying to connect), and then takes him out on the outside with an Asai moonsault (which takes too long to set up and leaves Sekimoto standing there like a dope waiting to catch it). It's not good, but at least it was bad in an active way. Most of the rest of their stuff was dull and generic in the way you kind of expect a match like this to be dull and generic. Please, bring on the suck. At least that's interesting. But all of a sudden, Mashimo finally gets in the match, and he gets paired up with Sasaki, and it's like night and day. Structurally, they're not mixing it up too much, but there's just so much more life behind their exchanges. Mashimo looks especially dynamic, having a lot of really crisp offense, and shows some hints of things to come. FUTEN was definitely good for this guy, but honestly, he looked like he was already most of the way there in this match. Their enthusiasm seems to rub off on the others, too, and overall, the second half of the match is a lot more fun than the first, including Sekimoto pulling Madoka off the apron and over the top rope for one of the best German suplexes of his very German suplex-heavy career. The finish is also really great, with Mashimo grabbing a crucifix on Sasaki and rolling it over into the Rings of Saturn, cranking Sasaki's arm over his shoulder to make him tap. The bad first really drags down the good second half of this, but it did make me want to see a Mashimo/Sasaki singles match, so that probably counts for something.

Toshiaki Kawada vs. Minoru Suzuki (NJPW, 8/11/2005)
Requested by Curt McGirt

I have mixed feelings about this. Overall, if I had to call it one way or the other, I'd say this was a good match. Both guys brought enough fire to the proceedings to keep my interest throughout, and that's pretty much the minimum of what I could ask for from a match. They hit each other hard and Suzuki made his funny faces and it was generally structured well. That said, I wanted to like this way more than I did, and while I did like it, I'm not really that enthusiastic about it. Kawada was all over the map here. He was pretty deep into his HUSTLE "not giving a shit" phase, and while there were glimmers of his past greatness (he will still chop and kick the shit out of you, if nothing else), he honestly looked bored a lot of the time. At one point, Suzuki locks him in the sleeper, and I could've sworn I saw Kawada roll his eyes. I mean, we are talking Samoa Joe in TNA "great wrestler just not caring at all anymore" levels of boredom here. OK, maybe that's excessive, but there are some low moments here. Meanwhile, we've got Suzuki. He's kind of a divisive figure in wrestling fandom: either you think he's a really fun superdick heel, or you think he's an irritating Villain Sue. I understand both views, but personally, I've always leaned towards the former. I think the main tipping point is that his no-selling tendencies have always struck me as a bit like Kevin Von Erich's no-selling tendencies. When a guy wails on them, I don't believe either guy isn't in pain (usually), I just get the sense that they respond to pain differently than most wrestlers. He's not the Ultimate Warrior is what I'm saying. But I'm not dumb. I do recognize he's a guy with limitations. He works better in tags than in singles, he works better against lower-ranked opponents than equal or higher-ranked ones, and he works better in short sprints than longer, slower-paced matches. This is a singles match where he's wrestling a higher-ranked opponent, and it goes 17 minutes, which isn't an epic or anything, but is about 7 minutes longer than a Suzuki singles match should go. It's not a sprint, which really hurts the matches main appeal: watching two tough bomb-throwing bastards lay waste to each other. I mean, I guess you can do that for 17 minutes, but they really don't. When they're throwing bombs, it's great, and they throw enough of them to keep the match fun overall, but the match as a whole is still worked at a surprisingly and frustratingly deliberate pace. I don't know. Maybe I just set the bar too high for this one.

The Road Warriors & Paul Ellering vs. The Varsity Club (NWA, 2/11/1989)
Requested by Victator

By contrast, I didn't know what to expect from this. The Varsity Club has been revisited a bit lately, and people with opinions I take seriously are saying that they were a really fun act around this time. Watching this match definitely bore that out. This is worked as a brawlers vs. technicians style clash, and the Varsity Club hold up their end of the bargain, with really aggressive looking amateur takedowns early on, and some great work over Animal's arm later. But the real surprise was the Roadies. I never thought much of them in the ring, but they hold nothing back in this match, clobbering the hell out of the Varisty Club every chance they get. Hawk looks extra vicious, laying in his shots really hard, but Animal really proves his worth as the face in peril. Yes, this is a match where the Warriors are actually fighting from underneath, and they look really comfortable doing it. I mean, I think I vaguely remember Animal and Heidenreich being shockingly good working that style, but couldn't think of the Roadies at the peak of their popularity ever doing it. Well, here they are, and it's fantastic. Hell, even Ellering looks good the brief time he's in, hitting a nice dropkick, and Sullivan doesn't hold this back at all. The finish does, unfortunately. After completely dominating the body of the match, Hawk gets chucked over the top rope after only the slightest of comebacks for the DQ. He takes a nice bump there, but I was hoping for an actual third act to this, so I'm let down. Still, what's there was great fun while it lasted.

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ME FEAR NO ONE, OH NO HEAR COME, THE FUTEN SHOGUN, KILLER TO THE EARDRUM- Futen 9/26/10

Takahiro Oba vs Ryuichi Sekine

Oba is basically the 2010s FUTEN Alexander Otsuka. He isn't going to get into a slugfest if he can avoid it, he will grapple the ever living fuck out of you, and he is maybe a little goofy. This was the most serious I have seen Oba, as this match was basically shenanigansless. Sekine plays the role of the firery rookie and while he may be a bit bland, he brought the goods here. Oba dominates early throwing Sekine around and twisting his limbs in painfully looking ways. Sekine gets a great comeback as he is able to get to his feet and throw some nasty kicks which Oba sold great. They have a really exciting end run to the match which ends with Oba escaping a near KO and grabbing a takedown and putting on a vicious kneebar. Excellent match, and a really great performance by Oba who is really becoming a favorite of mine.

Tamon Honda vs Kazuki Okubo

This match was structurally very similar to the first match, with Honda playing the roll of the veteran grappler and Okubo being the younger kicker. Honda had some nice tight holds and throws, his finishing guillotine was especially slick, and he sold his leg well. Still Okubo didn't contribute a ton, and the match never really built to much. Honda is always worth watching but the match was forgettable overall

Koichiro Kimura vs Brahman Shu/Brahman Kei

Kimura is the one FUTEN act I normally don't care for. He has had exclusively lethargic squash matches. He works stiff, but it's FUTEN, you are going to have to bring more to the table. This was by far the best of the Kimura matches however. The two on one aspect amped up the pace of the match, and the Brahman's were great as planes flying around King Kong. They actually got some pretty exiting near falls, and hit some cool double teams. It also seems like they kick harder every month which is something I appreciate.

Makoto Hashi/Manabu Suruga vs Kengo Mashimo/Madoka

This match had 3/4ths awesome FUTEN guys and when those guys matched up with each other it was good stuff. Mashimo vs. Hashi was basically a poor man's precursor to the Hashi vs. Ikeda stuff, full of hairline splitting headbutts and nasty kicks to the legs kidneys and face. Suruga is the blandest of the high end FUTEN guys, but he is a really solid wrestler and especially great at this style. His grappling, kicks, selling is all top notch. Unfortunately the hairless DDT junior with the Beiber hair brought his 4Liiean juniors workrate horseshit into my FUTEN match. Hashi beats him up some, but doesn't beat him up nearly enough. If he is going to do his rope running and flipping, I wan't Hashi to headbutt the algebra out of him. The good was good, but I don't think it outweighed the bad.

Daisuke Ikeda vs Takeshi Ono

Pretty much the wrestling version of Hagler v. Hearns round 1. The bell rings and Ikeda runs right into an Ono right hand and it goes from there. The story of this match is that Ono is the lower ranked member of their tag team (Apparently called Team Taco, Japan is weird) and he is going to throw the kitchen sink to take out Ikeda. Ono is a buzzsaw, throwing vicious punches in bunches square into Ikeda face and body. Ikeda absorbs these shots and fires back with big punches and kicks of his own. The finish is amazing wrestling, they both quickly counte multiple submission attempts, with Ono slipping out and landing a hellacious knee to the back of Ikeda's head, I expected cerebral fluid to fly out of his nostrils. Ono gets mount and starts pounding out Ikeda but gets caught in an awesome armbar from the bottom and is forced to tap. The best under five minute match I have ever seen, even though it was short it was a complete satisfying. Everything I love about FUTEN in one intense blast, the wrestling equivalent of a Bad Brains song.

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Dick Togo's Kilos Came, Gave You Bobby Brown Jaw

Dick Togo/Men's Teioh/Shiryu/Shoichi Funaki/TAKA Michinoku v. Great Sasuke/Gran Hamada/Naohiro Hoshikawa/Masato Yakushiji/Super Delfin Inoki Produce 12/1/96 - EPIC

This is one of the lesser know MPRO 10 man tags, but it was right there with all of them quality wise. The match took a bit to get rolling, as they worked more strikes then fast rope running exchanges. It gots kicking though when Togo and Yakushiji match up. They are really one of the most breathtaking pairings in wrestling history, the speed and precision with which they execute their ranas, armdrags and headscissors are without peer. Sasuke and Funaki have a couple of really fun shootstylish face offs too, which was unexpected, and Gran Hamada is Gran Hamada. The finish run was amazing, it reminded me of the last 25 minutes of Children of Men with mayhem and insanity exploding when you least expect it. Guys were hitting crazy dives with minimal set up, some thing insane would come out of the corner of your eye. Yakushiji won the death race with a tope over the ringside table, where he ended up completely vertical. You also had pretty perfectly timed pin break ups, as guys would be swooping in at the absolute last moment. Our man Dick gets the win with his unparalleled senton as he is suspended in air like a parade float only to land like boulder.

Dick Togo v. Steve Regal WWF 11/28/98 - FUN

An entertaining competitive squash which would have been perfect on a WCW Worldwide. Regal is vicious here really working over Togo's leg with a variety of nasty leg locks. He really had a Fuchish torturer vibe about him. I remember the Real Man's Man Regal as the pilled up nadir of his career, but looked pretty awesome, I have to see what else from that era is floating around the internet. Offense was suitably nasty, and bumped well for Togo's comebacks. Dick felt a little constricted here (man it is going to be tough to write these reviews without resorting to cheap jokes), he got a couple of runs, but I would have liked to see him go toe to toe with Regal a little more, they way someone like Psicosis or Villano IV would on the Pro, still he is an awesome Mario Mancini.

Dick Togo/TAKA Michinoku v. Madoka/Kota Ibushi K-Dojo 12/1/07 - GREAT

21st century juniors tag wrestling is very much not my thing, but this is about as good as this style gets. Togo and TAKA are in full on MX mode in the first part of this match. Working over the ladyboy Fantastics, cutting off the ring, poking them in the eyes, smirking and kicking ass. The really work over Madoka, and Togo is especially great at kicking the shit out of a guy in an entertaining way. Ibushi and Madoka take a beating well, and kick hard, so they were fine here. TAKA seems to have lost a little off his athletic fastball by 2007, but Togo is as fast, crisp and fluid as ever. The last ten minutes or so was the near fall fest that you would expect, it lacked the egregious kick outs which often kill a match like this for me , and they did some pretty cool shit. I especially liked the part of the match where TAKA tied up Madoka in a crossfaces and kept switching arms when he went for the ropes. Finish run could have used two minutes shaved off in the middle, and a bigger close, but it never lost me and I stayed entertained throughout.

COMPLETE AND ACCURATE DICK TOGO

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